Much as we all bemoan Hollywood's profit-driven desire to remake every movie we loved as kids, be honest with yourself: if you were an up-and-coming screenwriter, and a studio other than 20th Century Fox wanted to hear your take on a newfangled CLASH OF THE TITANS, you wouldn't turn them down flat. In fact, if you're being really honest with yourself, you might realize that - Ray Harryhausen stop-motion f/x aside - what was life-alteringly wonderful when you were eight hasn't aged all that gracefully - at which point it hits you that this is your chance to introduce a new generation of kids to the wild world of Greek mythology. Suddenly, you're writing a big Hollywood remake, and you don't feel the least bit guilty about it. So which deities did screenwriters Phil Hay and Matt Manfredi satiate to land the plum gig of reworking Harryhausen's popular take on Perseus's journey - and, most importantly, what makes them the right geeks for the job? Believing that you can't really know someone until you lunch with them, I sat down with the duo at Umami Burger in Los Feliz last February to ascertain whether they're real nerds or, as has become increasingly common in the industry, well-researched poseurs. Let's put it this way: when a DUNGEONS & DRAGONS digression veers off into a detailed appreciation of TSR's spy spinoff TOP SECRET (and then segues into light criticism of the MARVEL SUPER HEROES game), you know you're dealing with guys who spent an inordinate amount of their high school years in basements. (They also executive produced the D&D documentary DUNGEON MASTERS.) Because I know some of you are hitting up their IMDb pages and preparing to make AEON FLUX and THE TUXEDO cracks, please consider that a) they were hardly the only writers to slug away on those by-committee monstrosities, b) their first-produced work was the keenly observed coming-of-age drama CRAZY/BEAUTIFUL, and c) they got CLASH OF THE TITANS partially on the strength of their adaptation of Garth Ennis's THE BOYS (which is discussed below). Hay and Manfredi are highly regarded writers, and, having paid their studio dues in full, they're now getting to tackle the kinds of projects they would've paid to see as kids. I've yet to see the new CLASH OF THE TITANS (that happens tonight, actually), but listening to Hay and Manfredi rave about director Louis Leterrier's collaborative process has me hopeful they've delivered a film that will be more than the sum of its set pieces. As you're about to read, they were very cognizant of preserving the much-loved beats from the first film while strengthening the audience's emotional connection to the narrative; several times, they spoke of "getting into Perseus's head", and exploring the conflict between unquestioning servitude to the gods and a complete rejection of their authority. They've read their Edith Hamilton and Joseph Campbell. They understand the power of myth. And, perhaps most importantly, they respect the Bubo. Sam Worthington, on the other hand, does not. This is a partial transcript of what turned out to be a free-flowing discussion of all things Greek and geek. It went so well, I wish I would've done it as a podcast. Maybe next time...

Mr. Beaks: So often with projects like this, you can feel like you're trying to make a release date rather than a movie. Was there a lot of pressure on you throughout the writing process?

Phil Hay: I think we felt pretty comfortable. There was definitely pressure because everyone knew the studio wanted to make this movie. But the way we worked with Louis... it was an intense period. We holed up with him, hashed out what we wanted to do with him and producer Basil Iwanyk, and just went.

Matt Manfredi: We just immersed ourselves [in the writing], and there was enough time to finish it. But a situation like this was very educational, because we were always working with the entire team: the line producer, the f/x people, the production designer, and so on. It wasn't that kind of thing where you write a script, then you write another draft and another draft; everyone was coming in at different moments, and we were facilitating with Louis all of those ideas. Louis is very big on getting everything into the screenplay. There aren't passages of the screenplay where it's like, "This is the action sequence, so I'll just sketch it out." Not at all. There was beat-by-beat detail that we sent to Louis. That document needed to be precise due to budgeting as well, because of the speed at which everything was happening.

Hay: It was instructive because when you're writing something, you're usually worried about the read. But in this case, they're budgeting directly off of it, so everything was being taken literally from the script. Your job as a screenwriter is to always, no matter what stage it's in or how fast it's happening, your first job is to inspire everybody involved in the movie - from the actors to the crew to the director. It always is about the read, but there's also this added layer of responsibility of being as precise as possible. When you're in a world of planning visual f/x shots - and one of the great things about Louis is that he's tremendously prepared, and has everything storyboarded. If you know right off the bat that you can use a real scalpel on your CG, that's saving a huge amount of money that you can then spend elsewhere.

Beaks: So as writers, you were having to think about the budget?

Hay: In this case, yes.

Manfredi: But in terms of future projects, it is instructive to say, "Okay, this scene might be getting a little big."

Beaks: When did you guys come on to the project?

Manfredi: Probably July '08.

Hay: We basically came on at the same time as Louis. We'd worked with Basil before, and had just finished working on something at the studio. We started with a really good script by Travis Beacham, who we share credit with. Our job was to get in there with Louis, get in his head, and, between the three of us, concoct a very specific version.

Beaks: Did you read the [Lawrence] Kasdan draft?

Hay: We read that as well. It's weird, but in the world of studio filmmaking, there are multiple versions of the story, and you're just trying to find the one with all the [right] elements.

Manfredi: Kasdan's draft was going off of Travis's draft, and that take was more like a pan-world mythology. There were a lot of different gods; he pulled things from the Babylonians and so on. And when we came in, we thought it was important to keep it confined to the Greeks; for us, it was a visceral, childlike excitement we remembered.

Beaks: We're about the same age, so we have nostalgia for the original film. But for Kasdan, who was probably writing RAIDERS OF THE LOST ARK at the time, I don't know what CLASH OF THE TITANS really meant to him.

Hay: That's interesting. We've never had the chance to talk to him.

Hay: Actually, I think they came out the same weekend, RAIDERS and CLASH OF THE TITANS. Didn't they?

Beaks: I think you're right. [Beaks note: He is]

Hay: For our part, the desire to do it was that we loved the original movie; it was that very visceral, very basic and primal thing when you, like, went to a birthday party and saw it.

Manfredi: I remember that there was an excitement at seeing these myths that I had read about come to life. I had that book where each page was a new Greek myth accompanied by a line-drawing illustration of Medusa or something. I was so excited to see that come to life, so that was a thing to get back to with our version.

Beaks: How important was it to preserve specific beats from that film?

Manfredi: Everything that you - and we - remember loving from the original, we tried to put in there. Medusa, the witches, Calibos, the Kraken... we wanted to preserve the sense of adventure from the first movie. It's an adventure movie. Obviously, in 2010 you're going to have CGI, but for us as writers, it was to try to get inside Perseus's head a little bit more.

Hay: To take an idea like the scorpions, which in the original came from the blood of Medusa, and to twist that into a large battle set piece [where they] come from someone else's blood... those are great islands of stuff from the original movie. But our take is more about getting inside Perseus's head and creating his band of fellow travelers, all of whom we wanted to have more personality. The emotional storyline is what we were really excited about.

Manfredi: The movie is essentially about a man trying to find his place in this world ruled by gods who are not always wise.

Hay: That's one of the great things about Greek mythology that we always loved. We wrote a comedy about the Greek gods several years ago - we're kind of obsessed with the topic from any angle. But this idea that - and it's one of the main themes of CLASH OF THE TITANS - the gods are really not to be trusted or revered. Frankly, they're petty. They're completely crazy in some cases.

Manfredi: It's a guy trying to find what man's place is going to be in this world. Everything is changing. There are different points of view about loyalty to the gods, and we tried to represent those points of view as part of Perseus's journey: there is a soldier who is a very devout follower of Zeus; there is a soldier who is cynical about the gods - and pretty much everything; there is Perseus, and his journey is so much about whether he is going to give into the god side of himself or choose the man side of himself. In the end, it's about reconciling both of those things.

Beaks: So it's an agnostic CLASH OF THE TITANS?

Hay: (Laughs) It's open to interpretation.

Beaks: One thing I loved about studying Greek gods in elementary school was that it was like taking a course in superheroes. I realized that, for instance, the Marvel Universe was derived from all of this.

Manfredi: In a lot of ways, Greek gods are the precursors to modern-day superheroes. They all have their specific powers and weapons.

Hay: And the morals that come up are similar to the moral questions about superheroes. We wrote an adaptation of THE BOYS by Garth Ennis, and it's the same question: when you have so much power, you then have an amazing responsibility. That's kind of the way we've taken on some of the Greek gods here, but we also tried to spend some time with the gods and show that there are differences amongst them, too: there are times when they're wise, and there are times when they're fooolish; there are times when they see things clearly, and there are times when their emotions cloud their judgment. They're like people in that way.

Manfredi: Just the fact that you have these powers does not make you worthy of them, or worthy of adoration. It's an interesting thing to play around with.

Beaks: Since you said that you wanted to preserve everything we loved from the original, I'll just throw it out there: Bubo?

Manfredi: A cameo was filmed. But we have heard various reports of whether or not it made the final cut. They just locked picture.

Hay: We don't know if it made the final cut. It's been in and out. Basically, it was written and executed as a loving nod to that character, because, as a member of the journey that we [imagined], Bubo doesn't tonally fit. But Bubo is part of the lore of CLASH OF THE TITANS. So we thought, "Okay, let's have some kind of visual nod to Bubo that still fits in this world." If it's in the movie, it will hopefully play that way.

Manfredi: A nod to old, maligned Bubo. All he ever wanted to do was help!

Beaks: Was there ever an a really serious Bubo discussion?

Hay: I don't know whether we surprised Louis with it or not, but he was receptive. He was there the whole time we were writing it, so I'm sure we came over to his office one day and said, "By the way, what about Bubo? We have an idea for a scene, a cameo, for Bubo. What do you think?" We know for a fact that Sam was not a fan of Bubo. He did not like Bubo at all.

Beaks: The design of the gods and the other characters are, in many ways, different from what we're used to. Do you feel like you had any influence on the look of the film?

Hay: Because we came in at the same time as Louis, and he immediately started working with character designs, I would say we were more a part of that discussion as opposed to waiting to see how it was interpreted. Like the basic way the gods were going to look, with that John Boorman's EXCALIBUR armor, was a thing that we talked about. Louis had a whole concept for that, and a justification for why that came to be. But things like the Kraken... the size of the Kraken is something that's very important to think about when you're talking about how the end set piece is going to work. And with Medusa, how the tone of that scene, and how in the original... that scene is one of the best scenes in the original movie because it's got a sense of suspense. It's almost horror.

Manfredi: It's probably the scariest scene.

Hay: Yeah. And the fact that she has a bow is critical. It's funny, but that's something that was not in previous drafts. But we thought that was a detail that was important not only as a nod to the original, but to the entire dynamic of the set piece: you're facing someone who has this horrible power and this weapon.

Beaks: What about Pegasus? He looks quite different.

Hay: That was one of the first things Louis said, "Pegasus? He will be black." It all comes from a very thought-out place for Louis. It was more about making that horse look tough. And one of the things Sam said to us in the beginning was, "It's difficult to look tough riding a winged horse." (Laughs) But he really pulls it off. I mean, he looks tough no matter what, but it works. You really have to have a horse that has some muscles and has presence - and, actually, they found a horse that does have real presence. That horse is a bit of a badass.

Beaks: When you started writing the script, did they just dump a pile of mythology books on you?

Manfredi: We already had that stuff. (Laughs)

Hay: It was great to pull out my dog-eared high school copy of Edith Hamilton. But we talked with Louis about - if we're lucky and get to make more movies - what else we'd love to see on the screen.

Beaks: Are there any characters that you purposely held back for a sequel? Also, were there any tough decisions where you had to cut out a character you really wanted to fit into the film?

Hay: There were a couple of huge ideas where we just ultimately went another way. Those things would be great to exploit in the future. And there were some off-the-wall ideas. But I think we were really focused on this movie not falling into... you hope, if you're lucky, that you get to do it again.

Manfredi: There's a lot of real estate there. But in terms of a big new thing, there are definitely ideas that we just didn't have room for.

Hay: I think you learn as you go. We had a lot more stuff on Mount Olympus, and much more intricate plotting with what the gods are up to. But as the process went along, and as Sam got involved and gave Louis his take on things, you realize that you just want to be with that guy on his journey. You shape it around that, and then you hope that if there's another one, there'll be more stuff with the gods - and more stuff with the Titans. But we knew that we had to focus on this movie being as great an experience as possible.

Mr. Beaks: What's up with THE BOYS?

Hay: Looking for a director right now. We really were encouraged the best possible version of that story, and to be very faithful - which we have been. To me, the book is so special. It's a very difficult adaptation, but I think it's working out. We're really excited to see who we can get. I'm just really excited to see that movie.

Manfredi: I think Phil hit it on the head: from everyone at the studio to the producers... they all have an understanding of what THE BOYS is, and what makes it so special.

Hay: And what you can't turn it into.

Sounds promising. We'll finally get an accurate sense of what Hay and Manfredi are about as genre writers when CLASH OF THE TITANS hits theaters April 2nd. Faithfully submitted, Mr. Beaks