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Kevin Smith's Gonna HIT SOMEBODY - With Seann William Scott!!

Merrick here...
In over a decade of covering entertainment on the Internet, I can say with certainty that I've never linked out to the National Hockey League at all - most certainly not to cite entertainment news. Nonetheless, there's a first time for everything... Kevin Smith talked to NHL about hockey, and in the course of the conversation revealed details about an upcoming project - the hockey-centric HIT SOMEBODY - offering NHL.com an exclusive insight into the film's casting.
Smith revealed exclusively to NHL.com that Seann William Scott, who worked with Smith on "Cop Out," will play Buddy, the title character in "Hit Somebody." The script, based on a Warren Zevon song with lyrics by acclaimed writer Mitch Albom, is a story of a hockey enforcer who strives to score just one goal in a hockey game.
...says NHL HERE. In case you're like me, and aren't terribly familiar with the Zevon song, here's a refresher. Since the movie's based on the song, I suppose this could be considered a SPOILER - but here's how it goes all the same.
HIT SOMEBODY Warren Zevon, Mitch Albom - featuring Paul Shaffer and David Letterman He was born in Big Beaver by the borderline He started playing hockey by the time he was nine His dad took the hose and froze the back yard And Little Buddy dreamed he was Rocket Richard He grew up big and he grew up tough He saw himself scoring for the Wings or Canucks But he wasn't that good with a puck Buddy's real talent was beating people up His heart wasn't in it but the crowd ate it up Through pee-wee's and juniors, midgets and mites He must have racked up more than three hundred fights A scout from the flames came down from Saskatoon Said, "There's always room on our team for a goon Son, we've always got room for a goon" There were Swedes to the left of him Russians to the right A Czech at the blue line looking for a fight Brains over brawn--that might work for you But what's a Canadian farm boy to do? What else can a farm boy from Canada do? But what's a Canadian farm boy to do? What else can a farm boy from Canada do? Hit somebody! was what the crowd roared When Buddy the goon came over the boards "Coach," he'd say, "I wanna score goals" The coach said, "Buddy, remember your role, The fast guys get paid, they shoot, and they score Protect them, Buddy, that's what you're here for Protection is what you're here for Protection--it's the stars who score Protection--go and kick somebody's ass Protection--don't put the biscuit in the basket just Hit some, Buddy! it rang in his ears Blood on the ice ran down through the years The king of the goons with a box for a throne A thousand stitches and broken bones He never lost a fight on his icy patrol But deep inside, Buddy only dreamed of a goal He just wanted one damn goal There were Swedes at the the blue line Finns at the red A Russian with a stick heading straight for his head Brains over Brawn--that might work for you But what's a Canadian farm boy to do? What else can a farm boy from Canada do? But what's a Canadian farm boy to do? What else can a farm boy from Canada do? In his final season, on his final night Buddy and a Finn goon were pegged for a fight Thirty seconds left, the puck took a roll And suddenly Buddy had a shot on goal The goalie committed, Buddy picked his spot Twenty years of waiting went into that shot The fans jumped up, the Finn jumped too And coldcoughed Buddy on his followthrough The big man crumbled but he fell all right 'Cause the last thing he saw was the flashing red light He saw that heavenly light There were Swedes to the left of him Russians to the right A Czech at the blue line looking for a fight Take care of your teeth--that might work for you But what's a Canadian farm boy to do? What else can a farm boy from Canada do? But what's a Canadian farm boy to do? What else can a farm boy from Canada do?

And here's the song itself:

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Readers Talkback
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  • Feb. 22, 2010, 11:21 a.m. CST

    Yeah...

    by The Bicycle Sharer

    I liked Happy Gilmore, too, Fat Ass.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 11:22 a.m. CST

    Kevin Smith to reimagine Slapshot

    by Royston Lodge

    Too bad Paul Newman's dead.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 11:23 a.m. CST

    Send lawyers, guns and money

    by CarmillaVonDoom

    The shit has hit the fan....

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 11:24 a.m. CST

    One of my favorite Zevon songs, but...

    by Bungion Boy

    I don't think it needs to be a movie. It's a great little story in the song. But it's told in four minutes. Perfectly. I don't know if I want this stretched out to 90 minutes.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 11:24 a.m. CST

    From title thot maybe it was a Harmony Corrine script

    by KonkBob

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 11:25 a.m. CST

    And coldcoughed Buddy

    by schadenfreudian

    Nice lyrical fuckup. That should be Cold-cocked. <BR> Seriously, does coldcoughed even mean anything (other than what all of my coworkers seem to have this morning. Heyoooooo!).

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 11:26 a.m. CST

    Why not?

    by cloneomat

    'Pushing Tin' was based on an article.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 11:26 a.m. CST

    And I guess Coughlin's Laws will boycott this

    by schadenfreudian

    Since Letterman's involved.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 11:26 a.m. CST

    This song is RACIST!

    by Anything But Tangerines

    This is aboot respect! Excuse me! Can I finish? Can I finish? ... I'm finished.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 11:27 a.m. CST

    To Quote Bill Walton:

    by Aquatarkusman

    HORRIBLE. There will be far fewer laughs in this 90-minute movie than the 12-minute one SCTV made with John Candy knocking over some kid in a field.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 11:28 a.m. CST

    As A Canuck

    by DefyThis

    I think this is awesome. And yes, I'm the stereotypical hockey lovin', beer swillin' Canadian.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 11:28 a.m. CST

    Three things...

    by yourSTEPDADDY

    ...1 kev sure does tweet a lot bout hockey... 2 he should make a movie bout bein fat on airplanes... 3 all the main character has to do is go to LA and learn the Knuckle Puck from Keenan... hollywood need to give me Mighty Ducks Four! bring back Joshua Jackson and Keenan (i wonder what happened to all those other actors)

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 11:29 a.m. CST

    That's all fine & dandy, except...

    by cinemixtape.com

    it's not a particularly good song. Sure, it's gravy for anybody that loves hockey, but NO ONE ELSE WILL GIVE A SHIT. And hockey just isn't very popular nowadays. Seems like a vanity project that wasn't thought through.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 11:30 a.m. CST

    And...

    by yourSTEPDADDY

    ... if its set in canadia, get Trey Parker and Matt Stone to write the canadian dialogue... "what are you talkin aboot? im not your buddy, friend!"... classic

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 11:31 a.m. CST

    Yes, Smith can count on one thing...

    by blackmantis

    He'll make his money back on the Canadian audience alone...guaranteed.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 11:33 a.m. CST

    Is Kevin Smith writing?

    by D.Vader

    Or producing/directing?

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 11:34 a.m. CST

    So Smith doesn't want to direct his own scripts anymore?

    by knowthyself

    Mmmm.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 11:34 a.m. CST

    I don't see Sean William Scott as a goon.

    by Royston Lodge

    If Ethan Suplee magically lost all his weight and got muscles, I could see HIM as a goon.<p> Or maybe Chris Klein. His character from Election would translate really well to this kind of story.<p> Sean William Scott has too much of a whiny on-screen presence.<p>

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 11:36 a.m. CST

    Happy Gilmore Never Plays Golf

    by Crow3711

    Am I Right? Still...not the worst idea I've ever heard.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 11:38 a.m. CST

    Hey- MARK STRONG's been cast as Sinestro

    by D.Vader

    Just FYI, Merrick and others who may be interested.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 11:50 a.m. CST

    I still love Kevin Smith

    by The Chalk Outline

    He may be overrated and makes essentially the same film over and over, but fuck it, they're still better than half the comedy drivel that comes out these days. That and I'll watch anything with hockey in it. I actually paid to see The Tooth Fairy in theatres. I'm that big of a walking Canadian cliche.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 11:51 a.m. CST

    It's a start

    by CherikeeRed

    Maybe now I'm a little closer to seeing Roland the Headless Thompson Gunner at the movies.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 11:51 a.m. CST

    Soudns fun...

    by Zahaladeen

    ...if Smith writes it and Scott is allowed to be a thug version of Stiffler. As for "re-imagining" Slapshot... no. NO. NOOOOOOOOOOO.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 11:53 a.m. CST

    WORST...

    by Impevan

    SONG....EVER....

  • Feb. 22, 2010, noon CST

    Moose,

    by CherikeeRed

    you're a desperado

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 12:02 p.m. CST

    Slapshot truly has ruined it hockey movies

    by Galactic

    Cuz everyone is like "If it can't be better than Slapshot.... why bother?" And it's a valid point. Just hope Kevin Smith knows what he is getting himself into.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 12:03 p.m. CST

    Canada isn't winning gold in hockey

    by The Chalk Outline

    No chance. I said it before the tournament even started. They made some absolutely moronic decisions in picking players and making Broduer the #1 goalie was dumb as fuck. Who cares if he has a ton of Olympic experience? Ryan Miller had NONE before this year and torched his fucking ass. You play the best goalie CURRENTLY, which is Luongo, not Brodeur. Fuck experience. Fucking morons.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 12:03 p.m. CST

    oh yeah and USA! USA! USA!

    by Galactic

    EAT IT CANADIANS! YOU LOST IN HOCKEY!

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 12:03 p.m. CST

    When will someone make a Karma Chamelon movie?!

    by Royston Lodge

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 12:04 p.m. CST

    He has talked about this a lot

    by CmdX

    He really wants to do this movie... he is writing the script for it after he is completely done with Cop Out and going to go after funding (WB is going to look at it first supposedly) sometime late next month or into April.<p>I think it has a lot of promise, we'll see

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 12:04 p.m. CST

    Yeah, well, we'd kick your asses at Shirling!!!!

    by Royston Lodge

    http://tinyurl.com/26ldvq

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 12:13 p.m. CST

    Whatever the budget for this is ...

    by ThreeOranges

    ... expect it to be halved after Cop Out comes out.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 12:16 p.m. CST

    Didn't the Love Guru do enough damage to the NHL.

    by moorE12

    But all joking aside, I can't believe this movie will get made after the other "hockey" movie bombed so hard.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 12:21 p.m. CST

    Chalk Outline

    by Petro45

    I know! Luongo is obviously so much better than Brodeur! I mean, look at the stats! Brodeur is 34-20-3, with a 2.32 goals against average, and a .915 save percentage! Weak! Luongo, on the other hand, is 31-17-2, with a 2.35 GAA, and a .919 save percentage! The difference is obvious! With such stark statistical differences, OBVIOUSLY the intelligent decision would have been to bench the greatest goaltender of all time!

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 12:22 p.m. CST

    Tooth Fairy is doing ok business

    by The Chalk Outline

    Just surpassed its budget and will turn a profit. So it's not like hockey automatically dooms the movie to failure (lol, fuck you Myers you hack).

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 12:26 p.m. CST

    Petro

    by The Chalk Outline

    Stats don't tell the whole story (not to mention his career stats were greatly skewed by playing on a trap oriented team his entire career). Brodeur has been a complete and total failure during the playoffs ever since the lockout ended. Did you not see his epic failure last year? Besides that, when he was injured last year the team's BACKUP GOALIE came in and played better than Brodeur. Brodeur is washed up and coasting on his past accomplishments and being on a great defensive team.

  • At least wait until it bombs. jeesh.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 12:37 p.m. CST

    damn, Canadiens take hockey seriously.

    by ElJirafa

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 12:40 p.m. CST

    Chalk

    by Petro45

    Washed up and coasting on past accomplishments. Gotcha. His save % since the lockout is .922, .920, .916 and .915. I think most teams would take that. And I wasn't talking career stats, but since you brought it up, playing on a great defensive team may have helped his GAA, but not his save percentage. Besides, most serious hockey fans realized the whole "Brodeur is a product of his system" argument was bullshit years ago. Brodeur had one bad game, and even then, except for one goal (possibly two), it wasn't really his fault. You're going to blame him for Crosby deflecting the puck past him? If it wasn't for Brodeur, Canada would have lost to Switzerland.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 12:47 p.m. CST

    Nothing is ever Crosby's fault.

    by Royston Lodge

    He is the chosen one who will bring balance to the Force.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 12:49 p.m. CST

    Finally

    by MacReady452

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 12:49 p.m. CST

    Petro

    by The Chalk Outline

    He is a product of his system. He'd have still been a great goalie on other teams, don't get me wrong, but he wouldn't even be held in the same breath as Roy/Hasek if he was on any other team than the Devils. He's still a great goalie now too, but he's past his prime and Luongo is now the better of the 2, in my opinion. Unfortunately for Canada, the best goalies in the world are now on MULTIPLE other countries. Miller, Lundvist, and Vokoun (though I'm generally alone in thinking highly of him) are currently better goalies than anything Canada has, if you ask me. Even Russia's goalies are as good as Canada's. The one mega strength Canada was supposed to have in this tournament was defense and that has looked completely laughable at times.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 12:53 p.m. CST

    I've never understood the appeal of fighting in hockey

    by AnYangBluth

    Always found it to be a bit of a sideshow, like rodeo clowns.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 12:55 p.m. CST

    this will ALSO FLOP at the box office

    by idrinkyourmilkshake

    Unless it's got a $10 millions budget.What happened to the SCOOPS on this site?Al we get our poor film reviews-NEVER ANY sneak peaks or scoops at all!

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 12:55 p.m. CST

    great fuckin song...

    by Ashs_Right_Hand

    not sure about seann william scott tho..hes funny and everything but i was hopin this movie would be a little deeper than just a screwball comedy

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 12:56 p.m. CST

    doesn't strike me as big enough

    by palooka_boy

    everytime I hear that song I always pictured Kevin Durand... probably because of Mystery, Alaska

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 1:04 p.m. CST

    Kevin Smith better HIT THE GYM first.

    by YackBacker

    Poor fat self-loathing douche. Quit smoking weed, you're causing a nationwide Combos pretzels shortage!

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 1:17 p.m. CST

    The thing with the fighting in the NHL

    by CherikeeRed

    It's just that sometimes you've just got to HIT SOMEBODY. Say you're, hell I don't know, Wayne Gretzky. You're out there being the fuckin' Great One and Eddie Shack flies out of a temporal rift, onto the ice, and knocks you on your ass. Now you're Gretzky and all and that's cool, but you're 6', 185lbs of pure scoring ability-you can't afford the broken hand or 5 in the sin bin. You're no fighter. But Dave Semenko is. And Dave Semenko says you aren't allowed to touch Wayne. Ever. And Dave Semenko will kick the living shit out of anyone who does, regardless of time-travel abilities. The fights are all about sending very clear messages to your opponents, whether it's "Don't touch our talent" or "We're down 5 points but we still ain't your bitch" or "That check was a little bit much, let's discuss it". They're an important part of the game, and can put a lot of momentum back on your side

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 1:18 p.m. CST

    Chalk

    by Petro45

    One problem with the whole "Brodeur is a product of the system" argument: Brodeur has been the Devils goalie since 1993. Since that time, the team has had 9 different coaches. Brodeur won 3 Stanley Cups with 3 different coaches, over a nine year stretch. Needless to say, their have been many different players on defense during Brodeur's 17 year run. Isn't it amazing that, despite all these changes, the Devils defense has been amazing for 17 straight years? At some point, don't you have to acknowledge that Brodeur is less a product of the system, than the system is a product of Brodeur? Finally, you say that Brodeur wouldn't be mentioned in the same breath as Roy/Hasek if not for the "system." I don't recall the rules of the game ever being changed because of Roy and Hasek's dominance, the way that the NHL changed the rules on a goalie's handling of the puck due to Brodeur, aka the "Brodeur Rule." Also, Brodeur banged his hot sister-in-law. For that alone, he commands the greatest respect.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 1:28 p.m. CST

    Looking at peeps like Kevin Smith...

    by sansara07

    ...no wonder there is a world food shortage. What do you call Kevin Smith and Harry Knowles on the same airplane? Grounded.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 1:32 p.m. CST

    Need a new goddamn hockey movie! Slap Shot was 1977!!!!!

    by Tall_Boy66

    I like Kevin Smith so I'm totally on board with this one. Nobody, I mean fucking NOBODY, has made a hockey move in over 30 goddamn years that's actually worth a fucking damn. Even the Slap Shot direct to DVD sequels are fucking embarassing. So give Smith a shot, cause we need one very badly (Christ, there's a new baseball movie every 5 years, new football movie every 2 or so.) Hockey is one of the more cinematic sports, moreso than baseball, so it'll make a good flick. Also, fighting in the NHL is bullshit and totally not "a part of the game" because you'd see them fighting all the time, but notice now nobody has gotten into a fight at the Olympics? Then how is it a "part of the game"? Also, Brodeur made some real wacky way-out-of-his-net moments last night but it's only upping the drama for Team Canada to win gold.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 1:36 p.m. CST

    Fighting in the Olympics

    by CherikeeRed

    Will get your ass suspended. International rules =/= NHL rules

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 1:37 p.m. CST

    Petro...

    by The Chalk Outline

    No, Roy/Hasek never caused any rule changes (unless you count the foot in the crease fiasco with Hasek, lol), but practically every goalie in history since the 90's has copied pieces of both Roy's butterfly style and Hasek's unorthodox style. Both were pioneers in goaltending technique, much like Brodeur for puck handling, which clearly not even Brodeur himself can do right half the time (lol what a tool last night). <br><br>As for the system stuff, everyone knows that even with the coaching changes New Jersey stuck to the trap oriented style and limiting shots to the outside throughout much of Brodeur's career (abandoned it slightly when Sutter was coach).

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 1:45 p.m. CST

    Yeah, but they barely fight in NHL playoff games anyway

    by Tall_Boy66

    Seriously, the instances of fighting go down to, like, maybe 3 fights overall in the entire playoff series across the league right to the Stanley Cup playoffs. If it's such an integral part of the game, why don't they just fight constantly, including playoffs? Besides, hockey fights universally blow. All they do is spin around and punch each other in the ear. It's so lame. I want to watch a hockey game, not a really weak fight.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 1:51 p.m. CST

    I would pay $10...

    by REVENGE_of_FETT

    To see Kevin Smith and Sean William Scott beat weach other into piles of coagulated blood with hockey sticks.</p><p>If that's not what this film is about then I'm not interested.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 2 p.m. CST

    Fear Agent is fucking awesome....

    by REVENGE_of_FETT

    But I don't want Kevin Smith fucking it up.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 2:01 p.m. CST

    Why is AICN trying to access my keychain when I'm logged in?

    by Anything But Tangerines

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 2:02 p.m. CST

    Hockey movie will never fly in the States

    by sharkboy_shellyeah

    When you can get lower level seats at a Tampa Bay game for $35 and get a free parking voucher and free food and drinks just to get asses in seats, there is no way people will watch this movie. Sure , it'll do great in Canada, but when 7 NHL teams are on the brink of bankruptcy, what the fuck does that tell you? I admire Kevin Smith for taking a shot at making something other than an ass-backward romance with dick and fart jokes but now is not the time to try and pull this off. While Gary Bettman is obsessed with selling hockey in the States it simply can't happen.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 2:05 p.m. CST

    thats how mike myers mef his wife...

    by emeraldboy

    she got hit in the head with a hockey puck? ouch......

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 2:07 p.m. CST

    the farrelly bros tried to make a baseball once.

    by emeraldboy

    and nobody saw that.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 2:08 p.m. CST

    that should be baseball movie..

    by emeraldboy

    once. drew barrymore was in it.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 2:09 p.m. CST

    No, seriously, that's a great idea!

    by REVENGE_of_FETT

    Smith should make a comedy about a fat guy having the worst day of his life, culminating in being told to exit a plane. He then completely snaps and takes the plane hostage.</p><p>I'm not joking, I would see that movie!

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 2:14 p.m. CST

    Um...

    by yourSTEPDADDY

    Mighty Ducks was cool...

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 2:19 p.m. CST

    great idea...

    by emeraldboy

    theres only one problem. everyone has group these days. and er, overweight people are no difference. metabolically challenged i think is the term.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 2:21 p.m. CST

    Geektard, there's a lot of Arena Football League movies, huh?

    by Tall_Boy66

    Oh, wait, that league folded. Same with the XFL. And the WNBA is really tearing it up. And let's not forget just how interesting golf is. Sure, American's don't like sports that suck. Right.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 2:24 p.m. CST

    Let's watch NASCAR! That's a sport! Nee-haw!!

    by Tall_Boy66

    What was that about all the sports that Americans like don't suck? You really think you can defend that POV with fucking NASCAR? I mean, really? Or are you just really fucking retarded. I mean, it's fucking NASCAR.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 2:32 p.m. CST

    Kevin Smith's Gonna HIT THE INTERNATIONAL HOUSE OF PANCAKES!

    by SpyGuy

    Oh, wait...Too late.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 2:40 p.m. CST

    Geekard, you even SEEN Slap Shot or are you an idiot?

    by Tall_Boy66

    Ever notice how whenever greatest sports movies of all time are mentioned, Slap Shot is always always always in there? Or are you as stupid as you seem. Y'know, I've seen some apporpriate talkback nicknames in my time, but yours takes the fucking cake. Cause you really are a retard, Geektard. <P> You <P> Fucking <P> RETARD!

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 2:51 p.m. CST

    Wow.

    by Magnus Greel

    A concept that makes me want a reboot of something. If this is originality...

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 3:02 p.m. CST

    If Smith should make any Zevon song into a movie...

    by Hint_of_Smegma

    It should be Werewolves of London. I'd plonk my ticket money down for that, good buddy.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 3:17 p.m. CST

    Hey Tall_Boy 66

    by BanditDarville

    You can hate all you want on NASCAR, but it isn't going away. I for one will keep raising hell at the track, drinking cold beer and having a good time. Watch out, the Rednecks are everywhere!

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 3:28 p.m. CST

    I'd rather see a Mighty Ducks Remake

    by Pizziola

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 3:31 p.m. CST

    What is up with Red State?

    by Engelhast

    Will this be pushing it to the back burner? I really want to see what Smith does with a Horror movie.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 3:38 p.m. CST

    Nascar a sport?

    by sharkboy_shellyeah

    Since when did it take any athletic ability do make a left hand turn for 4 hours? Nascar appeals to the masses of idiots who realize that they also can drive around. Just because you put a stick in some rednecks hands does not mean he'll be able to skate at 30 miles an hour, stop pinpoint and then fire a puck at 100 miles an hour with a surgeons touch top corner. Beer-pong is more of a sport than Nascar.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 3:39 p.m. CST

    Sean Avery

    by Box_Bruceleitner

    The unofficial biopic. This could be sweet, I hope he bangs Elisha Cuthbert and then gets into a bitter off ice feud with a douche Calgary Flames defenseman. Hell if Scott cuts his hair short he'll even kind of look like the prick.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 3:41 p.m. CST

    WHY does Kevin Smith still get ink?

    by la_sith

    Fuck this talentless, stoned fat-ass. He's nothing more than a late show punch-line at this point.

  • Awesome.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 3:48 p.m. CST

    Stifler is box office poison as a leading man

    by exie

    It's why they keep him out of the trailers for Cop Out as much as possible. And don't give me Role Models. That movie was Rudd and McLovin' with Stifler stalking around in back cursing with a little kid. He's hardly a lead actor and the public can't accept him as anything other than Stifler. Pair him up as a leading man with Kevin Smith and I predict the movie will make about 6 million domestic if they give a free blowjob with admission. Without the blowjob, this will be lucky to go straight to Starz.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 3:52 p.m. CST

    So it's a Slapshot remake?

    by davidwebb

    What next, Youngblood?

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 3:52 p.m. CST

    As a life long hockey fan I have to say...

    by Alkeoholic77

    I have always thought Slap Shot was overrated.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 3:55 p.m. CST

    davidwebb

    by IHaveSeenEveryEpisodeOfPrisonBreak

    According to IMDB Slap Shot and Youngblood are being remade and slated for 2012.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 3:56 p.m. CST

    "like" Zevon

    by hst666

    Still prefer to see a Roland the Headless Thompson Gunner film.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 3:57 p.m. CST

    FUCK THIS

    by The Goon

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 4:24 p.m. CST

    Boner is missing!

    by Jubal_Early

    Andrew Koenig, who played "Boner" on Growing Pains, is apparently missing. Random post, I know. But then it's a random story worthy of random spreading. Koenig, I'm reading, apparently played the Joker in a fan film called Batman: Dead End, and Kevin Smith and Alex Ross agreed it's Batman the way you've always wanted to see him. I had no idea. Anyways...we're all just floating...

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 4:25 p.m. CST

    Hate Kevin Smith?

    by ZooTrain

    Go make your own fucking movie. No? Then shut the fuck up. He's not the greatest filmmaker ever, but he was once like us. Only he made it happen. You just bitch. And criticizing Kevin Smith for making the "same movie over and over"? Have you never seen a James Bond film?

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 4:31 p.m. CST

    So I'm guessing a hockey enforcer doesn't score many goals usual

    by Amy Chasing

    Cut me some slack, Australia is mainly made up of desert.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 4:36 p.m. CST

    Chekov's son is missing?

    by Royston Lodge

    That sucks.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 4:37 p.m. CST

    Broomball: The Motion Picture.

    by Amy Chasing

    As exciting as it sounds.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 4:38 p.m. CST

    THEY SHOULD DO A MOVIE ON DURAN DURAN'S VIEW TO A KILL

    by BringingSexyBack

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 4:40 p.m. CST

    HOCKEY? NO, I'D RATHER SEE A MOVIE ABOUT RUSSIAN

    by BringingSexyBack

    women's curling. Seriously, I've been enthralled by the sport the past week.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 4:43 p.m. CST

    What has 300,000 legs, six teeth and 82 IQ?

    by Ivan Alexeev

    A Nascar race.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 4:54 p.m. CST

    NASCAR sucks

    by F-18

    I know the stereotype is "all Southerners love NASCAR", but I'm one that thinks it sucks ass. <p> I know who the drivers are, but sitting and watching them race in a circle for hours is fucking boring.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 4:55 p.m. CST

    KS is going to hit somebody?

    by Xiphos_2

    You know what won't be a hit? a Kevin Smith movie.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 4:55 p.m. CST

    Kevin Smith in I GIVE UP

    by JoeSixPack

    Kevin Smith stars as himself in a movie where he gets super fat and stops even the attempt of making a good film.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 5:01 p.m. CST

    Drag racing>NASCAR

    by Xiphos_2

    So is open wheel just because the wrecks are better. Let's be honest here nobody watches NASCAR for racing strategy but for the wrecks. Oh sure they'll say all the right things but reality is big crashes=big interest.<p>

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 5:10 p.m. CST

    Can Kevin Smith get fatter?

    by fiester

    How fat does he have to get before it's not funny anymore? Not his movies: they have not been funny for a long time.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 5:20 p.m. CST

    No, reallly. How fat is Smith?

    by Uncle Stan

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 5:40 p.m. CST

    does anyone wanna bet?

    by yourSTEPDADDY

    ...that Kev is gonna get liposuction or become even fatter due to this "fat mess"? ...but whoever suggested the "fat man, bad day" movie has somethin there...just DONT CAST PAUL BLART!

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 5:46 p.m. CST

    I like Sean William Scott.

    by MaxTheSilent

    I think he's genuinely charismatic and talented. Although if Smith is gonna try and glorify those boneheaded fuck-wits who play hockey to start fights then I might sit this one out.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 5:46 p.m. CST

    and whats wit the wedding dress spam?

    by yourSTEPDADDY

    ...of all the sites to spam about wedding dresses, you pick a film site whose viewers are marjority fat, unable to "wife" a woman, or teenagers (not sure on the last part anymore) who arent even near gettin married...now, if the spammer spammed about diet pills, porn, or action figures, then it would make sense...worst spammer ever!

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 5:47 p.m. CST

    Merrick, you've been doing this for DECADE?

    by Proman1984

    You still sound like an amateur douchebag. Shit man, you suck.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 5:48 p.m. CST

    and SWS is ok...

    by yourSTEPDADDY

    ...I just cant stop starin at that neanderthalish brow of his...the casting agent for that Geicko caveman show really messed up...

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 6 p.m. CST

    K.SMITH...GOB OF GOO!

    by salv1031

    KEVIN I LOVE YOU! YOU BOEING SINKING BEHEMOTH!

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 6:01 p.m. CST

    Stop Covering This Film!

    by Chaosinabox

    I'm a die hard Kevin Smith fanboy, but I really wish Smith would stop talking about this film, and that the press would stop covering it. Smith himself has said he's got *NO* script written yet and *NO* studio is currently backing it. He's also said Warner Bros. MIGHT be interested in making it if Cop Out is a hit. This entire project is currently nothing but Smith's wishful thinking. It's 2010's Red State.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 6:12 p.m. CST

    remember when kevin smith was cool

    by ORIONgods

    because i dont

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 6:33 p.m. CST

    Put down the bong and chips, Kevin.

    by fiester

    Start eating right and get a personal trainer--you have no excuse for being such a massive lardass. You have more money and time than you know what to do with, so instead of making another piece of shit movie how's about you set aside two months to lose 20 pounds? It's a start anyway. Maybe cutting out the weed and donuts would help your writing too. Might make a watchable film again someday. Fuck it: just take a year off to workout--you get fit and we don't have to hear about any more painful new Kevin Smith films for a good twelves months. It's win-freakin'-win, fatboy!

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 6:37 p.m. CST

    If he's the title character, shouldn't his name be "Hit Somebody

    by CountryBoy

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 6:48 p.m. CST

    Hell yes! Pumped this movie is coming out

    by andrew coleman

    Go Hockey. Go Kings.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 6:52 p.m. CST

    Kevin Smith has a habit of...

    by MrPoop

    ...talking about his future movie projects like they are a sure thing. Jason Mewes as Jimmy Olsen, Jason Lee as Fletch, The Green Hornet, Ranger Danger, and his 60 Million dollar budgeted Sci-Fi comedy he was blabbering about when he thought Zack and Miri was a can't miss hit. All never happened. <p> He has no funding yet, hasn't finished the script and hasn't even signed Sean W. Scott officially. Just more blabbering from a guy who loves to be in the news.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 6:57 p.m. CST

    Dr Mr Smith....Stiffler is done, didn't anyone tell you?

    by SlimButNotreally

    Sean William Scott is bad....real bad. He's the last resort when you can't get guys like Will Ferrell, Seth Rogan, or hell, even Ben Stiller. You didn't actually START here, did you? I mean...no one WANTS him in their movie...they're just left with no options.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 7:01 p.m. CST

    And what an ego

    by MrPoop

    First he says that Hit Somebody will be a movie he thinks will win Awards during an MTV interview. LOL, Kevin Smith Oscar Winner! <p> Now in this article he is saying this will elevate him and Sean W. Scott to Tom Hanks status. I like SWC, but please, if anyone is going to elevate him it isn't going to be Smith.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 7:09 p.m. CST

    MrPoop, sounds like you took it out of context

    by SlimButNotreally

    Based on how you described it, it sounds like Kevin Smith was joking.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 7:27 p.m. CST

    Nah, he was serious

    by MrPoop

    Here is the quote... <p> “I never once thought about winning awards or anything, but that movie I think can do it,” he said. “If I play my cards right and we get the right people in it, it could be an award-type movie.”

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 7:29 p.m. CST

    Definetly a joke

    by Star Hump

    Smith knows he's an untalented hack who got lucky. Scott however has talent. Who knows where he'll end up.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 7:31 p.m. CST

    hmm. maybe he was serious

    by Star Hump

    Then that makes Kevin Smith a DELUSIONAL untalented hack who got lucky.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 7:45 p.m. CST

    Here is a link to the video

    by MrPoop

    He definitely sounds sincere in speaking about it being an award winner. It is at the very end of the interview... <p> http://tinyurl.com/qga2j7

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 7:59 p.m. CST

    Warren Zevon=awesome

    by nostairway

    Mitch Albom=worthless piece of shit That is all

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 8:35 p.m. CST

    love hockey, like the song, loathe kevin smith

    by HoichiTheEarless

    The odds of this guy making a 90 minute turd out of an enjoyable five minute song are rather high.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 9:08 p.m. CST

    oscar worthy

    by Ashs_Right_Hand

    i really think this could be an oscar-caliber movie (at least writing-wise, dont know bout w/ sws in the lead role tho...u can all say what ya want bout smith as a director so far, but the motherfucker can write, and the bare bones of the story as written by albom are pretty good....i really think he can do a good job wit this

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 9:12 p.m. CST

    i don't know how the word HACK became so overused.

    by RedHorseVector

    but could you know-nothings please find a new word to misuse?

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 9:15 p.m. CST

    Hockey Sucks

    by hoorayforeric

    Sorry. Grew up in Florida...if I couldn't play it in P.E. It sucks. I didn't "play" the 12 minute run and didn't "play" jumping jacks. So those don't count...we played soccer...but that doesn't count either. It sucks, too. I'm talking real sports. Football, Basketball, Baseball....Gator ball and which girl gets her period first.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 9:39 p.m. CST

    Kevin Smith is funny

    by Rupee88

    His Smodcasts are and so are his intervies...his films are kinda funny..some more than others.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 10:36 p.m. CST

    mark strong is sinestro

    by ORIONgods

    there u go aicn. give me my check

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 11:19 p.m. CST

    ORIONgods

    by Xiphos_2

    That check has to go to D.Vader he mentioned the Mark Strong casting on this very TB about 11 hours before you.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 11:19 p.m. CST

    Hollywood's new trend...

    by Johnny Smith

    ...should be to adapt Warren Zevon songs. I'm serious, no one would see it coming, and it would secure asses in seats. After this, I'd be up for David Lynch's Roland the Headless Thompson Gunner; Ed Harris's Renegade; Spike Lee's Lawyers, Guns and Money; Danny Boyle's Werewolves of London; Tim Burton's I'll Sleep When I'm Dead; Zak Snyder's Ourselves to Know...yeah, I can see this. DO IT, HOLLYWOOD.

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 11:19 p.m. CST

    New word for hack is

    by Xiphos_2

    RedHorseVector

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 11:30 p.m. CST

    David Fincher's EXCITABLE BOY.

    by Johnny Smith

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 11:30 p.m. CST

    Stick the hack on a fuckin' plane...

    by Citizen Sane

    ... and send his Hugh Jass back to Jersey! Oh, yeah. That won't work. Is he too fuckin' heavy for freight by rail too?

  • Feb. 22, 2010, 11:42 p.m. CST

    For those who say we only complain.

    by MrPoop

    I think Mark Strong will make an excellent Sinestro and I'm looking forward to the GL movie very much.

  • Feb. 23, 2010, 12:24 a.m. CST

    someone get him some new clothes.

    by alice133

    plz get him some long pants.

  • Feb. 23, 2010, 12:56 a.m. CST

    I've never heard that song before...

    by veebeeyes

    but it was surprisingly awesome, even though I don't even like hockey. Now I'm almost look forward to this movie (even though I don't even like Kevin Smith or Seann William Scott). Now if someone will just be kind enough to adapt "The Ballad of Hollis Brown" into a movie.

  • Feb. 23, 2010, 1:04 a.m. CST

    Cop Out looks awful

    by WilliamZabkaRox

    Tracy Morgan is very annoying in the trailers. I think Kevin Smith has a bomb on his hand. Not a good month for Mr. Smith.

  • Feb. 23, 2010, 1:54 a.m. CST

    Seann William Scott!!

    by Sepulchrave

    That's the most egregious use of two exclamation marks I've ever seen!!!

  • Feb. 23, 2010, 3:09 a.m. CST

    Cop Out looks like it could be funny.

    by liesandpicturesofalsolies

    Definitely a rental or a matinee, but I'll see it. I think Hit Somebody could be interesting. Say what you want about Kevin Smith, his ego, and his work: he puts himself out there completely. His level of investment in Hit Somebody is compelling to me. Also, I love the sport of hockey in movies. It bores me to just watch a game but movies it is the best and only.

  • Feb. 23, 2010, 3:37 a.m. CST

    I LOVE

    by Thehairyhandedgentwhoranamucinkent

    warren zevon, the man was an amazing story teller. no need to make this movie

  • Feb. 23, 2010, 4:45 a.m. CST

    Coming Soon: CLERKS 3!

    by LaserPants

    You know it, I know it, let's just all admit it; this will fail as badly as Zack & Miri and Jersey Hurl. Smith had one trick, one trick, and it's a pretty good trick, but it's one trick, and he'll never escape it. His only recourse is back to the tried and true. Watch.

  • Feb. 23, 2010, 5:22 a.m. CST

    TOO FAT TO FLY

    by LaserPants

    There's his next "film" title. Btw, how fucking HUMILIATING to be TOO FAT TO FLY!! HILARIOUS!!!

  • Feb. 23, 2010, 5:25 a.m. CST

    Obesity Isn't A Disease, It's A Lifestyle Choice

    by LaserPants

    Last I checked, nobody forced you to eat 679,852 deep fried fat chocolate cake hoagies for a "late night snack." The only thing that makes you fat is eating too much. It's not a disease, it's a lifestyle choice.

  • Feb. 23, 2010, 8:11 a.m. CST

    Laserpants

    by WickedJester

    Exactly what I said on the previous Kevin Smith is fat talkback.<br><Br>You don't pick your race and you don't pick to have a disease -- and people treat being fat like it's one of those.<br><br>You don't pick to be asian and you don't pick to have leukimia. <br><br>You pick to eat Burger King everyday or the aforementioned deep fried fat chocolate cake hoagies.

  • Feb. 23, 2010, 9:32 a.m. CST

    Favorire Director's Directing Your Favorite Songs

    by What The Duck

    Terry Gilliam/Mastodon's-Crack The Skye

  • Feb. 23, 2010, 9:55 a.m. CST

    Werner Herzog's MY SHITS FUCKED UP

    by savagedave

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qHDdqubE7zQ

  • Feb. 23, 2010, 10:24 a.m. CST

    Hey, I grew up right by Big Beaver.

    by Mooly

    Never heard of this song before though.

  • Feb. 23, 2010, 10:34 a.m. CST

    Uwe Boll's HIT ME BABY, ONE MORE TIME

    by LaserPants

    The turgid sequel to HIT SOMEBODY in which the now fat, ugly, and drug addled Britney "Used To Be Hot" Spears is punched repeatedly in the face by reality.

  • Feb. 23, 2010, 11:44 a.m. CST

    title character

    by WYLD STALLYNS RULES

    "Buddy, the title character in 'Hit Somebody.'" It's quotes like this that make getting up in the morning worth it.

  • Feb. 23, 2010, 12:45 p.m. CST

    I've got nothing against Letterman and I don't boycott movies

    by Coughlins Laws

    based on who's involved. If I did, I would never watch any movie out of Hollywood, as I find most people in Hollywood, in front and behind the camera, detestable people. I take it on a case by case basis. From the description given, I can't tell if this movie is something I'd like. It depends on the tone that Smith takes with it. Will this be based in reality or will it be constant slapstick? I'll let you know in a year when we see the first trailer...

  • Feb. 23, 2010, 1:11 p.m. CST

    What the hell is wrong with...

    by sai_justin

    ...the cruel, pathetic, so-called "movie fans" that post on this site? I've never witnessed such a large gathering of bitchy old maids in my life. Someone needs to lead you all into the nearest crematorium - promises of an ACTUAL platform to vocalize your bile on should be a sufficient carrot. Please, save some oxygen for the productive world.

  • Feb. 23, 2010, 1:28 p.m. CST

    You can absolutely "pick to have a disease".

    by veebeeyes

    There are a whole lot of diseases that one can get due to personal lifestyle choices. I don't know where the hell you're getting the impression that if you have control over something, that it's not a disease.

  • Feb. 23, 2010, 3:39 p.m. CST

    FATTIES ON A PLANE!

    by fiester

    Cue Sam Jackson: "Get these motherfuckin' fatties off my motherfuckin' plane!"

  • Feb. 23, 2010, 6:15 p.m. CST

    Kevin Smith's gonna HIT CONTINENTAL AIR WITH A LAWSUIT

    by MrMysteryGuest

  • Feb. 23, 2010, 6:57 p.m. CST

    My god, how FUGLY has smith's wife become?!!

    by Epileptic SpudMonkey

    Check her out at his website http://www.newsaskew.com/ at the premiere of Cop Out - what the hell happened to her? She suddenly looks middle-aged in a completely hideous, manly way! Putting a couple of streaks of purple in you hair doesn't hide botched surgery and a fugly puffy face droop. To go from pretty hot looking to middled aged tranny looking in a couple of short years is damn unlucky to say the least. Damn, no wonder smith's been so miserable for the last year or so - poor bastard!

  • Feb. 23, 2010, 6:58 p.m. CST

    Kevin Smith's NIGHTFLIGHT TO VENUS

    by Stuntcock Mike

    Bought two seats.

  • Feb. 23, 2010, 6:59 p.m. CST

    Stanley Kubrick's Grandma in the Corner

    by Stuntcock Mike

    .

  • Feb. 23, 2010, 9:56 p.m. CST

    Saw Cop Out last night...

    by Heckles

    ...and I was surprised how much I liked it. Damn funny. Scott wasn't in the film much. But, Smith seemed to know how much to use each actor in Cop Out. Have faith he can do it again on this next flick.

  • Feb. 24, 2010, 2:42 a.m. CST

    am i the only one that thought jay and silent bob..

    by iwasredempted

    strikes back a very underrated movie. very funny stuff.

  • Feb. 24, 2010, 2:44 a.m. CST

    smith needs to do more films that he doesn't...

    by iwasredempted

    personally write. i think the same thing about m night. they are talented. they just need to move away from their own scripts.

  • April 25, 2010, 6:03 p.m. CST

    check out this SMODcast/Bropodcast commercial at http://www.yout

    by avenger0102

  • April 25, 2010, 6:05 p.m. CST

    check out this SMODcast/Brocast commercial

    by avenger0102

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9ZPsyJR16eY