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Harry loves his FROZEN cinematic treat!!!
I like Adam Green - he's a young filmmaker that in his first 3 films he's shown me three very different looks. For HATCHET, he created a batnuts gore extreme 80's Slasher killer ghost story, that is what I call a rollicking good time. For SPIRAL, he created a very introspective horror that rivaled some of what Lucky McKee has done best. But with FROZEN, he's created something that I refer to as Hitchcock With Teeth. The premise can be sold with a single image of three not entirely bright friends on a Ski Lift at night with the lights out during a winter storm.
How did they get stuck on the Ski Lift? Well, it is through no fault of their own. This just happens to be that unbelievable nightmare that you hope and pray never ever happens to you. Suffice to say, once you see this film, begging the Ski Lift operator to let you have one last run before closing.. well, you may never ever do that. At the very least, I would say it is highly unadvisable.
This is one of those suspense, survival films where whether you loved the film or not, you and whoever you took to see the film with, will spend an inordinate amount of time talking about what YOU would have done, what YOU would not have done and generally how horrible it would be to be stuck in the situation provided by the film.
There's a part of me that would love to see this get turned into a Stage Play, because it is kinda perfect for it. 3 characters, 1 location and a lot of characters beating themselves up over every little decision that led to this situation.
Who is in the film? Well, the most recognizable actor is Shawn Ashmore (ICEMAN from X-MEN flicks), he's pretty damn good here. You'll also see Kane Hodder in a very brief and kinda horrific cameo. At least, to me, it is horrific. You'll see.
All that said, the reason to see this movie at theaters this weekend is very simple... it is a fucking amazing audience film.
The first time I saw it was off a DVD screener I got sent for consideration for BUTT-NUMB-A-THON 1138. I watched it on my Movie night with my movie night friend Diana - and about half way through, it felt cold and scary in the house - and we wound up gripping each other, screaming and making crazy "EEEK" style noises as the film continued.
I was sold - and instantly made the calls to secure the film for BNAT. The film played at around 3 or 4 in the morning. Once the "shituation" is in full nightmare mode, the audience was squealing, squirming, shivering and screaming in reaction to the film. My wife was looking through fingers at the screen. The freshly de-pregnified Annette Kellerman next to her had her jaw open in that silly THIS IS SO AWESOMELY HORRIBLE grin she gets.
Now after the film - you'll find people that talk about how they couldn't get into the film because the characters were so stupid. Honestly, these are not the brightest kids. But ya know what. There's alot of dumb fucks in this world that might do some of the ungodly dumbshit these dumb fucks do... That said - I found the film entirely realistic. The girl is one of those excruciatingly helpless damsels, but she kind of relishes that. And we all know girls that are like this girl. That if they were in the situation, they would be a fountain of stupidity from which the boys would drink and then do INSANELY STUPID SHIT all in the name of being a MAN, a HERO.
The movie is a vicious, scary and horrifying experience that was so much fun to see with people that squeal at every frostbite gag, _____________, and then there's the ________s. And the ______s are so fucking evil. I love em. It really is a howling good time!
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isn't this supposed to be shit?
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Fuck.
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it's not playing in Austin, Harry! Have the Alamo fix that fast!
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to this film so much! Can't wait.
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Idiots hunting wolves because people think they are dangerous to man. I hope not.
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Because it's not playing near me.
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I have the DVD screener with me now and plan on watching it tonight. Heard good things plus i'm going skiing this weekend!
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Harry spends half the review talking about what a great audience experience it is, and someone pipes up with "I'm gonna watch it on a screener!"
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Nice.
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...Is Benecio del Toro going to cameo and link this to the "Wolfman?"
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Yes, suck it you motherfucker for once again skipping the dvd section. You are full of shit. And Adam Green's HACHET was one of the biggest pieces of shit ever made. But I guess he is sucking your cock so you can review his newest crap positively. Fuck you, Harry, really, fuck you.
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* You don’t get to pick when you’re going to be professional, and when you’re going to be amateur. *
When would you choose to be an amateur? Well, probably the moments in which you obviously suck, either because you don’t know what you’re doing, or you’re just not very good at it. Or at least in the moments when people are criticizing you. You’d say, “Hey, what do you expect? I’m only an amateur.” That sounds like Ain’t It Cool News. You’re using amateur status as an excuse. You’re basically saying, “Don’t judge me.” And here’s where this indirect proof falls apart: People will always judge you. You can’t control that. You can’t control what scale they’re going to judge you on, or which criteria are most important. The only thing you can control is your work. And that’s why your work, all of your work, has to be professional.
http://johnaugust.com/archives /2006/professional-writing-and -the-rise-of-the-amateur -
They lost 3-0 last night.
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WB is pressuring chris nolan and myself to have batman 3 ready for winter 2011, apparently WB wants to mimic the christmas sucess that avatar has had. At first chris david johnothan and i were against it because we wanted to stick to our july 2012 timeline, but after david i belive it was brought up that if we set the film during the winter it actually would benefit the film and story, so looks like we may be headed towards a december 9th 2011 release date for batman 3.filming should start end of may this year and the story is shaping up amazingliy
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Feb 03, 2010 5:45:07 PM CST
It's a shame Anchor Bay can't release it wide.
by the gospel according to bastardface
It's fantastic to see fresh, original suspense films like this are made and hopefully it won't go unappreciated by the lucky few who can see it. I can't wait for it.
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We missed you.
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Anyone in half-way decent shape could just climb down special ops army style hand over hand legs hugging the cable. To make sure you don't fall you could make a safety loop out of a couple of belts/torn fabric tied together round your waist, undoing and reattaching it after every chair. Only one person has to do it, the other people can sit and wait while the person goes and gets help. Sure it would be tiring, and sure it would take you 2-3 hours depending how far you are from the base. But if your life is on the line, you can push yourself and your body pretty far. I'm by no means a tough guy and am not trying to brag. I'm only about 150 pounds grown man, and a slender, not very muscular build. I have run a marathon though, took me a little over 4 hours, tough as hell, but my life wasn't on the line. If it was, I wouldn't let some tough physical exertion stand in my way.
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"Bugnuts, batshit, batfuck, fucknuts" etc etc..............
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and it's true I adore you!
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Feb 03, 2010 6:05:35 PM CST
I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'd rather watch
by randomwordrandomword
Touching the Void again to see actual, riveting, harrowing frozen survival horror, than this movie.
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much like a cancer that refuses to go away - at least, until it finally kills you.
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the same vein. And let me guess, young twentysomethings beg the lift operator to let them have one more lift. They bribe him with a bit of liquor and/or cash. Lift operator dozes off for a moment, or is distracted by snow bunnies, and just happens to forget about the folks stuck on the lift...ooorrr, its the old guy has a heart attack ploy.
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Those cables are razor sharp.
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Seriously... I was LITERALLY biting my fingers at some scenes. It doesn't help that I work for a ski resort!Great, great movie. Everyone I talked to enjoyed the hell out of it. Seek this out if you can. I know I'll be seeing it again!
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*SPOILERS*Lets go over why this movie is dumb as fuck:
1. One guy who is injured gets EATEN BY WOLVES. Then, another guy, WHO IS NOT SERIOUSLY INJURED, is also EATEN BY FUCKING WOLVES.
2. Ski resorts that are only open Friday->Sunday are rare, mostly because in the US climate there simply isn't enough time during the year to ski.
3. Are you saying that 3 young adults aren't carrying cell phones with them everywhere they go?
4. This, and ultimately this is the biggest issue I think anyone could have with this movie. WHAT THE FUCK DID THE HILL STAFF THINK WHEN THEY FOUND THEIR CAR IN THE LOT? OR THE HILL STAFFER THE NEXT DAY (IF THE LOT WAS NOT LIT)???It isn't scary, it isn't suspenseful, it is just one long collection of the stupidest shit a screenwriter could possibly come up with. -
Seriously it sucks living in tampa because shit like this never makes its way down here. Seen most of Greens stuff because of the fantastic fests, guess I'll be holding out for the DVD.
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which means it's not believable at all. Also, Hatchet had a cool monster design and some good gore, but the acting and everything else pretty much sucked. No, that's not right, it definitely sucked.
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I finally have to ask the question.
I love Harry and I've been coming to the site for many years, but his 2 or 3 sentence DVD "reviews" have never really amounted to much. Serious question here: why the passionate obsession with Harry's DVD column? It is a completely pointless feature. -
Harry's out of left field love for some films, snubs for others, and insanely over the top female ejaculations for movies I've never heard of used to be entertaining. Sometimes informative.
Dare I say that I respect the guy's opinions? It could be true. Even if those opinions are quite often tardy. -
Obviously Harry's taste in film is very close to my own or I would have never stuck around. If he could accomplish a MONTHLY column, loaded with the grindhouse/sleaze that he has unique perspective on (wink wink) I think it would be GREAT.
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Deep breaths. Deep breaths. I think perhaps Harry likes provoking the more excitable in our ranks. Maybe he is hanging out with Herc too much?
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I shall file it right next to "Open Water" on the movie shelf.
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The reason stupid characters in horror films are so fucking annoying is because the best sort of horror and scares comes from putting yourself in the place of the characters. When someone onscreen does something OBVIOUSLY idiotic and wrong you lose the audience. Whats interest and truly frightening is watching someone do eevrything right and fail anyway, and to be honest thats really the only kind of horror I care to watch these days, because the other kind has been done to death (no pun) and it's just so fucking unoriginal and boring. Realistic characters who keep getting the decks tacked against them is the only way the genre will ever grow, you should know this Harry.
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everyone enjoying what is basically a "best of" aicn TB. And the added "I told you so" element because the films have already come out.
As for Harry, no-one wants to hear about his sexual proclivities and when he puts horrible images of himself into our heads which is a DVD column specialty. Just like the unsettling image of 300 pound grown men 'giggling' and tittering like a schoolgirl. And pathetic fantasies like this post's thing where he was cuddling a chick who wasn't his wife. What a wheelchair-bound stud!
No, I think the dvd columns are all about the talkbacks... -
I did think for the very first time Harry had a very good excuse for the Christmas DVD column break. He wanted to spend time with his wife/family. Completely fair enough. No excuse the rest of the time though, and he did promise the third week of Jan catchup... make up your mind man or just don't say anything at all.
It doesn't bug the crap outta me, but I think a good solution would be to just post the thread with the titles and no reviews (and eventually no freebies for Harry), and just let us go at it! -
Feb 03, 2010 9:24:19 PM CST
I hope the lack of "freebies" isn't a factor with this...
by soylentmean
I agree with white_vader. It's the talkbacks that people are looking for, opinions on films not yet seen. Unless Harry's still on vacation it seems like the column should be a pretty constant (and easy) thing.
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a Legion or Edge of Darkness review by Harry. Not to mention the dvd column.
This ship needs a good swab! -
I only like to see the DVD column so I can find out what is new on dvd and blu-ray. Harry's 2 or 3 sentence poorly written reviews mean nothing.
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Go to Best buy and look at what's on the fucking shelf. Jesus...
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That movie was so bad i couldn't finish it i took it and traded it in.and seriously wtf is with not getting the dvd column done?it can't be that hard to do.i always enjoy looking and posting there.no excuse it just seems lazy
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Extreme situations that force characters to make extreme decisions and live with the consequence thereof are one of my favorite types of stories.
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Feb 03, 2010 11:12:39 PM CST
I don't buy that the wire rope would be too sharp
by randomwordrandomword
to climb on. Too sharp to what slice through your fingers? Please, the steel braided rope is very thick and round so that it would support a reasonably light persons' weight distributed over four limbs. Too sharp to cause pain, sure if you're using bare hands, which you wouldn't be if you were on a ski trip. Gloves, reinforced with leather, or other materials would work. Even a little pain is endurable if you want to survive. Just a copout they probably cooked up.
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Smart stuff, right there....
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and common sense. We aren't talking shit about this piece of cinematic shit because the characters were stupid, but rather because THE WHOLE GODDAMN PREMISE IS STUPID! Of course Captain Fatty loves it, as it dishes pain and misfortune to sort of guys who most likely made life hell for him through grades K-12. Ironically, you are a small man Harry, and you seek catharsis in the darkest fantasy worlds imaginable.
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but perhaps the lift operator intentionally strands these kids on the lift, and has a buddy steal and dispose of their car? perhaps? no? if a bad enough storm were coming in, say an ice storm as opposed to snow, the slopes might close down until the storm passed, there could be a logical explanation for the resort to be shut down for a few days. so, nothing like that was worked into the script? harry?
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Hatchet was brilliant. the gore was top notch, and the comedy "set you up" for some good jump scares. for what it is, it serves its purpose very well.
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Youtube "Mythbusters chair lift"- they couldn't escape on the cable because it was too sharp and metallic. Even hanging clothes over it- they ripped. Couldn't jump without serious damage because it was too high. Watch it and accept defeat haters. Looking forward to this. Almost every review has been stellar.
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Wow has Hollywood sunk so low that the monster is now a Ski Lift?
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The future is sitting on a sofa with a remote picking from a selection of 10,000 movies on a menu screen. Physical Media's days are numbered.
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Actually, my life was never made a living hell by Athletes, jocks or any of their ilk. In High School, in addition to having 150,000 comics at my house and a couple thousand VHS tapes... I was also the kid that was in Marching Band, was a lineman on Football team for a bit, threw shotput, discus, but damn school didn't have a javelin. High School was a pretty outstanding time actually. Very worry free. Sounds like your High School was filled with jerks, kinda like you. We were all pretty human in High School. And yes I was in Theater, Math Science, Business clubs. So yeah, I was a geek too. I just didn't shy away from athletics or the good things in life like women, food, movies, comics, MTV, WWF and Video Games.
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But here is the closest link I could find to what you are talking to http://www.youtube.com /watch?v=45nsuu8Kka8 &feature=Play List&p= 9102FA7DDDAB675C&playnext =1&playnext_from= PL&index=2 Sorry a lot of spaces in there. But those guys try to use jeans as a zip line. While it doesn't work as a zip it also doesn't cut through the jeans like you said. Maybe you can provide the link you are referring to?
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Sounds like you had a ball in your teens!
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...so I hope that this time, finally, an Adam Green movie actually lives up to the hype.
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even though it actually happened. Twice, if I recall.
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is utter shite. It is just free web links advertising for Amazon to make them even more money.
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Solanine is completely correct. "Open Water" is all too believable for a large number of places in the world where people dive.
I dive all over the world and the quality variance between even basic safety procedures such as counting non-guided divers back on the boat is amazing.
This is going to sound like patronising generalisation but I'll lay it out there anyway....You are generally OK with Western owned companies or Westernised dive masters. Anywhere the liability culture is embedded and they have to be careful to avoid nasty court cases.
Anywhere not so liability focussed and they can be a nightmare.
In a Middle Eastern country that I shan't name for fear of giving all the operators there a bad name (most of them are bloody good!!) I have personally had to make the boat stop from departing a reef area because I noticed that whilst all us divers were back on board, the non-diving lady who came along for the ride and her young son had gone snorkelling and had not yet returned. If I hadn't, they would have looked up from the water to find themselves all alone on a reef, several miles out to sea.
I have seen divers come up on the wrong boat at crowded dive sites and get included in the headcount. Only to then realise and leave for their real boat without telling anyone.
I have seen Russian divers decide the rules don't apply to them and to go off without a buddy as they have air left at the end of a dive and their assigned buddy is down to the red zone.
I have seen big boats (40-50 guests plus) taking people on snorkelling trips and not even bothering to count people in and back.
I've also been shot at by an Indian fisherman whilst diving with guide.... but that's another story! -
That's my approach out of sticky situations like that.
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they're stuck on a ski lift for an hour and a half?
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In a Donner party sort of way of course. What did you think I meant?
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I thought you meant cunnilingus.
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Just TRY to post DVD reviews consistently.We all appreciate the site.But consistency is key. PEOPLE LOVE THE DVD column.If you can't hack it, perhaps MASS? could help out..or someone else.Truth is, people might be using it to determine whether to wacth something coming out or not.Me, persoanlly-I LOVE when you review the obscure shit (the direct-to-dvd films that pop up in blockbuster)..and sometimes your reviews shape my decision on what to rent.So, in all honesty..just give us what we want.If not you, have someone else do it.I could do it for you week in, week out and I have the stomach for watching doo-doo on dvd and telling it like it is.I also appreciate your foreign selections/criterion recommendations as well! Just, please..don't let it die man!
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have fucking ruined horror movies because now every horrific situation can be fixed by some asshole pulling out his cell phone. so to adjust does every horror movie have to place their setting in the past (pre-cellies) or jam their goddamned protags out in the middle of nowhere? or can you fucking assholes suspend your disbelief for 90 fucking minutes and enjoy a fucking movie without being a prick?
frozen is a great little movie and just because harry likes it (and i dont always agree with him) every wants to shit on it? then you bitch that there are no good horror movies out there. adam green is giving you good horror. you whiney cunts just can't get over your own negativity long enough to enjoy a fucking movie anymore. if you retards made a horror movie what would it be? your characters sit around for 80 minutes without a wifi connection that allows them to bitch about every thing under the sun? that would be truly horrific for you bastards wouldn't it?
goddamnit i hate myself. you guys make me hate myself. im going to go masturbate now but i'll be keeping an eye on you pricks. -
Wow. So true, CharlesbronsonLIVES. Great post. Also, great comeback, Harry. I think AICN needs some comedy patrol here. People who are gonna post mean shit should be funny- if not they should be deleted. Not sure which Mythbusters link you found but the one I watched on TV they tried to slide with jeans because they couldn't slide with their hands. The cable was too sharp. The jeans would get stuck right away and after a few moments, rip in half. In terms of the cell phones, I have never once had service on a mountain and therefore usually leave mine in my car or in the locker- but we'll see how they explain it in the movie. All I know is if I see a character hold their phone out and say "Oh no! No bars!" I'll be very let down. Especially after Green brilliantly made fun of that device in Hatchet with Harmony from Buffy. "No bars! The South sucks!" In terms of sliding down with a ski pole- maybe they do that? But aren't these supposed to be real people and not action heroes? If it were me up there I would try jumping and take the risk of a sprained ankle.
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with his movie night "friend" Diana. all i know is, if i spent the night grabbing onto some girl who's not my gf/wife, i'd find it VERY cold and scary in my house afterwards.
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You've kept this site going even though people (and I use the term loosely) continue to down you and and everything they see on this site. Yet they keep coming back and spewing their insane rants day after day. You seem to be a gentleman and a scholar sir and if I ever see you at the pub, the pints are on me! Keep up the good work!
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...it's my understanding these kids sneaked onto the lift. That's why no one knows they're there.
And yes Randomword... your idea sounds reasonable enough. Can't see why they can't shimmy the cable.
Soylentmean...Open Water was based on true events. It happened. -
...If it was anyone one of us mo fo's stuck up that lift, we would cry like bitches, then fall and get eaten by wolves. You know it.
If it was me, I would let Harry go first. After the wolves had got knackered eating him to death, I would use his bloated carcass to soften the fall. The Wolves, having gorged themselves on the Big Ginger, would still be too sleepy to give chase.
Failing that, I would scoop him out and use him as a shelter. -
And you think he smelt bad on the outside!!!
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Feb 04, 2010 10:42:00 AM CST
I love it when audiences assume they're all action heroes...
by chewtoy
The vast majority of people would fall and die if they tried to run on top of a moving train, no matter how common it is in even television stunts. "Life and death" stakes don't usually make people perform *better* at tasks other than simple fight or flight reactions.
Likewise, the average skier would be hard pressed to climb up to the wire wearing ski boots and ski gloves when the thing was parked at the lift, let alone when it is hanging a hundred yards off the ground. Being exposed to sub-zero winds while grasping a frozen steel cable for "hours" is already ridiculously hard, and again, in the best of circumstances the average skier would have a hell of a time climbing off of the wire, over the coupling wheels and onto a lift tower considering that *they're not designed for this*.
I'm sure all of the Rambos who post at this board could do it easily, but to suggest that it's stupid to have a movie where the lead characters can't is pretty hilarious. -
You forgot about the crying.
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To zip down the cable using the ski pole as a handle. Beats jumping.
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So the theater has an abortion clinic?
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A 40 foot drop onto POWDERY SNOW would not kill you. And two guys together with ski poles could not be eaten by wolves. Grizzly bears, sure. Wolves, no. Wolves are just big dogs and if you have three guys with two ski poles each you could kick the ass of every big dog in the state.
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I just saw that Industrykiller! made the same comment, but, yeah...They tried to zipline with a pair of jeans. Very different from what RandomWordRandomWord suggested.
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I would probably pull off a couple of radical back flips on the way down. After I landing I would grab the nearest wolf and fuck it hard, rip off my shirt, yell loudly and slam down a Mountain Dew.
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Don't forget that said audiences (and majority of the tools at this site) would most likely be winded by the time they got their boots on earlier in the day and just say, "screw it, I'm watching Tremors again."
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Feb 04, 2010 12:15:25 PM CST
Open Water really happened? So scratching diving from my...
by soylentmean
bucket list.
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Sarah Palin is way ahead of you, brother. She's all for hunting wolves from helicopters. Of course, if they are Things in wolf form that's another story ...
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Feb 04, 2010 12:49:53 PM CST
Colonel, but that would be in Antarctica and everybody knows...
by soylentmean
what happens in Antarctica stays in Antarctica. Unless the alien fuckers make it off that godforsaken rock...
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impossible. More improbable than anything else. Of the two, I'd have to say the premise for Frozen is the far more unbelievable. Then again, I like Horror movies and don't hold them up to the same standards of suspension of disbelief as say, an action movie.
So, I guess the lesson learned from this talkback is that one shouldn't go open sea diving with disreputable diving companies and that one shouldn't go skiing without letting somebody know when you're supposed to be back, in case something happens.
Oh, and bring your cell phone everywhere, including open water diving. They do have watertight dive bags for things like wallets and cell phones. Just saying. -
now that would be scary. Stuck on a ski lift with giant anthropoids actively trying to reach you so as to suck on your succulent marrow, sheesh that's scary.
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I wanna party with you cowboy!
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Friction is a bitch to overcome, and will either keep the stuntman from sliding much at all or grind through whatever he's hanging from. Most zipline stunts are performed with pulleys for this reason. 160+lbs grinding against steel does not move easily, especially at angles where you'll be moving forward farther than down.On a side note: Hanging from a ski pole? Seriously?
As for the drop not killing you, I haven't seen the movie but I'm sure it doesn't. Far more horrible is getting a compound fracture with your leg bone jutting out of your flesh, leaving you unable to get down the mountain, screaming in pain while your buddies are still in the lift above you. It's also probably where the wolves come in...
Wolves don't attack people (at least in North America... I've heard that in India they've started to, seeing as how there's a billion people and little else to eat there...) But if they did, they would totally destroy a tired, cold, bruised skier (with or without a ski pole). Humans in snow and ski boots aren't at their most agile. Wolves are agile fuckers in snow, and they're about as comparable to "big dogs" as a chimps are to wiry children. (Plus, try asking some K-9 units how well they think a tough criminal with ski poles would do against one police dog, let alone a pack of them.) I really do like the picture painted of three guys back-to-back, each double-wielding ski poles against the advancing horde of wolves though. I'm just not sure it's the "more believable" scenario on how things would go down.
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AT&T? Dead meat.
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Police dogs have two big advantages: the criminals aren't actively trying to kill them, and they're backed up by humans with guns. But trust me, if the SAW guy put me in a room with a ski pole and two police dogs and the challenge was I had to kill those fuckers to get out, that would be two dead police dogs. [I've never understood the stories where a dog bites onto someone and they can't get it off. Gouge the fucker's eyes out with your fingers and he'll let go, trust me.]
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...[Group of wolves] could so easily beat [group of guys] why are dogs our slaves?
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You will immeadiately respond to anyone who comes to the talkback and assassinates your character, but you won't respond to anyones request to know why the DVD column hasn't been done in three weeks. Way to have your priorities straight!
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What will the Hendersons think?
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Just needed to say it. Got tickets to the midnight screening of Frozen tonight!
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Why so bitter, Harry?
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When an 80 lbs. dog grabs someone's leg and starts shaking them like a rag doll, literally ripping the muscles and flesh away from the bone, it may be that carefully considered retaliation is not the first reaction they have... (much like few actual swordfighters, when stabbed through, pull themselves deeper onto their opponent's blade in order to strike back at them... as bad-ass a move as that is.) Most people likely scream, kick, and struggle to get away. Of course, unlike police dogs, Wolves aren't trained to hold prey there until a policeman comes to arrest it... If someone did strike back, they'd probably let go, back up, attack again, or just wait/follow until the person/prey bled out.As to why dogs are domesticated, it starts with the fact that wolves and man aren't natural enemies, and early dogs likely lived on the edges of human settlements because of the easy (non-human) food we provided, much like coyotes do in modern cities. As time went on, each species saw the benefit of living together; dogs got easy shelter and food, and humans got an early alarm system and added protection. So over time they grew closer and worked together more and more. However it ultimately happened, it probably didn't involve 3 guys subjugating the wolf population with a pointy stick in each hand.
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That link I provided IS the one you are referring to. But you're wrong about the cable, there is NOTHING in there about it being sharp. The jeans won't slide because the friction in the jeans won't allow them too, not because the cable is sharp. Also the jeans rip at one point where the dummy is clamped onto them, not where they are hanging on the cable. It's the dummy that makes them rip and when a human is hanging on them no such thing happens. I don't see why the cable would cut a persons hands, particularly when wearing gloves.
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The dummy made the jeans rip because it got stuck and then the weight of the dummy torn them apart on the wire. the only reason they didn't rip with the human on it was because the human always let go and fell into the trapeze net. Lift cables are made of metal- not rope. They need to be metallic in order to not fray or come out of the wheels of the towers. My brother in law is a ski patrol at Okemo and he said if you were to hang a belt and try and slide it would cut in half. They are not meant to be climbed on- especially in the bitter cold. It would hurt like hell. Then again, I haven't seen the flick yet and won't til tomorrow. I'll let you know how they addressed this- but so far everything I've read and heard makes enough sense to go along with. It's unlikely to happen- but it's one of those things that could happen with human error and the mountain employees not doing their job correctly. Jurassic Park wouldn't happen either- but it was logical enough to go along with, pretend was real, and have a lot of fun. I don't get why these boards have to be so negative towards every single thing the writer's post?
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My bad for reading this shit but thanks for the spoiler warnings about the fucking wolves. Would have been awesome to have been surprised. Second my bad is reading ANYTHING coming from the rear ends of those here who would never be so stbupid, never let something like this happen, never sit there without, and of COURSE never ever EVER!! So fuck you.
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Seriously, if you don't even want to know what's in the trailer for a flick, you definitely shouldn't be reading the talkback.
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I don't know about all these glowing reviews, I saw a few that mention bad acting and that the movie falls apart pretty quickly. In a slasher film, that's fine, but acting is pretty important in a movie like this. I also hate being told this or that movie from Sundance or Slamdance or Yamdance is the next best thing and I swear, almost EVERY FUCKING TIME, the movie sucks or just makes me wonder how bad the non-celebrated indies are. What's funny about that is that if the source is a magazine or web reviewer (especially on AICN, the movie is never that good or is being vastly oversold for what it is. If it's your friends or even other TBers saying it's good, it usually is a lot closer to what you're expecting... or something.
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Sorry. Had to. It's my new thing. I'm like the "first!" guy but different...
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i will avoid it like the plague. I rented Hatchet due to Harry's review. For shame Harold, for shame.
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Just saw the midnight show and wow what an intense fucking flick! Whoever said the acting sucked is an imbecile, in fact- whoever wrote "I heard the acting sucked" clearly made that up as no one could say that. Totally get why even all of the mainstream heavy hitting critics (NY Times, Roeper, Shalit, Reed, Chicago Sun Times, ABC) loved it. Web love is one thing- but mainstream love is something else. Breath of fresh air- and yes- every one of your speculative problems with it are answered to the fullest. Definitely never gonna look at skiing the same way again. The female lead was my favorite, but Ashmore killed it during that fight scene with her. Very emotional, very scary, and extremely well shot. So happy as I've been on the positive side of speculation and it's always nice to see the shit talkers be so wrong. See this movie. Spot on with your review, Harry. I don't always agree with you- but you were dead on this time. Now let's see if you were right about Shutter Island. From the trailer I'm guessing Leonardo is crazy the whole time, but I gotta hope Mr. Scorcese is better than that obvious and overused twist. Looking forward to it.
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After scooping Harry out and using him as a shelter, then using the scoopings on the ground below to break the fall in the morning, I would flip him over and ride his cavernous shell like a sled all the way back down the mountain. No wolf could catch me!!
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is a real fucking stupid plan. The blood and meat would freeze upon you, while covering you with the scent that wolves would chow down on like you wouldn't believe. SO - I would just recommend snuggling up with the big fat guy, eat the accumulated snow on my vast surface area for liquid - and wait out the weekend, and moving around to keep circulation going. Oh, and always keep your coat zipped up and the scarf around your face. Probably more helpful then crawling up my ass... but Dude... whatever floats your boat.
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Damn..... you have thought this through!!! Snuggling it is then, maybe using your ginger beard as some form of rudimentary wind break. Just promise you don't snore.
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You can slag off the big guy all you want, but when he speaks to you in Talkback, it truly is like being touched by a big, gingery movie Jesus!
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Why yes, that is a somewhat accurate description of Harry.
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...remember in the beginning when Windows couldn't reach anybody on the radio?
"I doubt if anyone has talked to anyone on this whole damn continent and you want me to reach some one" poorly quoted...anyway...
He couldn't reach anybody because the Thing had already made it to the rest of the continent and maybe the world and there was no one left alive.
Or maybe not. It's an interesting idea though that these men may have been the last men left alive on Earth. -
Sorry but your speaking arse, not to put down the bite power/agility of dogs or wolves but...
Pound for pound humans are by far the most dangerous animal on the planet, were talking an animal that hunted woolly mammoths as their major food source using sticks and rocks.
I remember reading a story in the paper of 3 police dogs being set on two fighting men at a party that got out of hand, the two men were squadies of some sort, stopped fighting each other and promptly killed the dogs with their bare hands.
Wolves are dangerous, humans more dangerous still. -
Rabbits do.
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...is coming to dvd in april. Gota love that movie, creatures come up from the sea to kill, and rape women. One of the best drive in flicks ever. One of the benefits to Harry shrugging off the dvd column is I went in search of some dvd releases and found dvd verdict which not only gives review but gives realease dates damn near a year away. Buncha Corman coming, and one of my all time favorite movies, No Time For Sargeants.
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Never thought of that angle (the Thing had already escaped). I don’t think that’s the case since it shows the Norwegians digging up the ship, but it’s an interesting idea – and could be used down the road for an interesting Thing sequel with a small group of humans as the last group alive on earth (probably a bit too close to the I am Legend concept though) and we know that Hollywood is only interested in new, fresh ideas.
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Feb 05, 2010 10:48:06 AM CST
Laughing my ass off at the people arguing on whether they could
by gordon bombay
I agree with Chewtoy, the vast majority of people on here would do no better than the people in the movie. I am allowing for that 1% who are apparently trained in the methods of ziplining, climbing on suspension wires, cold temperature survival, wolf fighting (with ski poles as weapons no less), etc. I love how everyone on here thinks they are Rambo. I seriously can not stop laughing, please keep it up guys. Morons.
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When they keep being defensive about pple criticizing the "This wouldn't happen..." nature of the film. It worries me.
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His reviews were shit, but that's not why I went there. It was because every once in awhile he pointed out some awesome releases that I never would have noticed before. That's what I miss.
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If I had to fight five Girl Scouts, I might not escape. But we're talking about fucking animals here, and not particularly tough ones. Wolves just aren't like lions or tigers or bears, folks. They're big coyotes who will run away if you fart at them, or fold like bitches if you hit them with something heavy or stab them with something sharp. People are more dangerous than wolves. Even people who are pussies.
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Uhhh, I don't think a pack of wolves is going to shrink away from a hurt animal, no matter what it is, if they're hungry. Wolves are not just "big dogs" or coyotes. Have you ever seen the size of timber wolves in a museum like the Smithsonian? They can be pretty enormous.
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Something that I DIDN'T like about the movie is that- while Green avoided the overused "Oh no, no bars!" bullshit... he had them mention three fucking times where the cell phones were. First two were organic. Third time I was like WE GET IT. Then again, I've read so many reviews were the critics think they're so smart by saying "What- none of these kids have a cell phone?" So maybe three times wasn't enough times to mention it. Silly critics, movies are for fans.
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"They're big coyotes who will run away if you fart at them" - Wrong. Dead wrong. A pack of wolves will tear apart a half-ton elk, which is a lot stronger and better protected than an overconfident guy with a ski pole. Check out the wolves vs. Grizzly Bear video on Youtube.
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If wolves are so tough, how come there's only ONE documented instance of wolves killing a human being in the wild, and even that one is disputed? http://www.cbc.ca/canada/saskatchewan/story/2007/11/01/wolf-verdict.html
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Featuring 2 guys with ski poles vs. a pack of hungry wolves.
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Come on, wolves have been on the outs for most of the 20th century I believe. There aren't as many of them around as there used to be, and they mostly avoid humans. That still does NOT mean a pack of wolves WON'T attack an injured human.
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I would love to see skiers take down a woolly mammoth. That would rock as an action sequence. And I'm totally sure that talkbakers are just as fierce as cavemen ever were.
FluffyUnbound: It's because wolves don't attack people. I said that at the beginning. It doesn't happen... It's the same reason they don't hunt bears. Even if they could win, what the hell is the point of all that trouble when there are deer and such? The reason that wolves and bears sometimes are documented fighting, however, is because bears actually try to take a carcass away from wolves from time to time, while most humans don't decide to wrest a dead moose out of the jaws of other animals. That, and the fact that if people have a problem with wolves, they're just going to shoot 'em... not attack them with melee weapons or go bare handed.
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Wikipedia concurs that the North American wolf is a great big pussy. There are lots of historical incidents where European wolves attacked humans, but the North American wolf runs away if you call it names.
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I found a report from Alaska on reported wolf attacks on humans. No deaths, but attacks yes.
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We're all fighters here. Cept for that damned opossum.
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That whole "playing dead" thing is just to lure you in close... then, when you go to shovel them up, it's a hissing ball of needle teeth straight for your face. They're like giant rats fueled by nightmares and the tears of the innocent. Honest.
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Came home one night to find a dead possum and lots of blood everywhere. Thanks a lot, my dog. Anyway, I grabbed a shovel and went out to inspect it when I realized that... it had moved. It wasn't in the same position it once was. Then I detected some breathing. Oh shit, it was still alive, what was I gonna do? The poor bugger. I was home from college and housesitting my dad's old house. I called him up and explained the deal. He said I should grab the airgun and shoot through its eye, that ought to kill it and put it out of its misery. Another friend suggested putting it in a garbage bag and beating it with a shovel. I went back outside and noticed it was now in a different position/area. Then it hit me: This thing was playing DEAD. I googled possum's and looked at the signs, which included expelling a foul-smelling, green liquid. Went back out and noticed it was everywhere. Yep, this thing got attacked by my dog but was playing possum. I went back in to look up something else and when I returned, the possum was standing up- but that's all. He wasn't moving, just standing, like he was waking up. Eventually, he disappeared. I didn't notice him go, but I was glad I gave him time to wake up before I went and put him out of his misery. Poor bugger.
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The short answer is: guns.
The long answer is because of all that is entailed for full documentation.
Check out this article:
http://www.aws.vcn.com/wolf_attacks_on_humans.html -
YOU are a fucking imbecile. I didn't pull 'the acting sucked' out of thin air. You are either a fucking shill or plant for this movie with how hard you fought against someone merely mentioning that the acting MIGHT be sub-par for such a premise BASED UPON WHAT THEY READ. I didn't say the acting sucked, I said I HEARD it sucked. And to prove you're a fucking douche bag, peruse JUST THE REVIEW SYNOPSES at this link and tell me that no major reviewer said something negative about not only the acting, but the film as a whole:
http://tiny.cc/7IriK
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...thus endeth my critique.
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Well, since I doubt that anyone here has fought off a pack of wild wolves lately, I would say that anyone here who underestimates a wolf's ability to rip your throat out is talking out of his/her ass. One more thing to ponder. In our area, packs of coyote have been known to take down a large moose, so it sounds plausible enough that a wolf (which is much larger than a coyote) can take out your average, injured ski-yuppie.
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An adult wolf can crack a moose femur in 3 bites.
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I can crack one off in 3 strokes.
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Good idiot Open Water was based off of a real couple who got left behind on a scuba trip and were eaten by sharks. Fucking idiots on here sometimes. This movie is great. You so called movie fans should support small thrillers like this instead of just trying to be smart asses. I will return to my stance that I think the hate on here is based off jealousy. Someone makes a low budget thriller and it pisses some people off because their screen play never got picked up. Grow a set of balls and get a real opinion.
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Ok Harry. You say the characters are supposed to be stupid but they are ungodly stupid. The one guy who is freezing doesn't even both to put up his hood. The girl with frostbite on her face doesn't both pulling her hood tight. Just leaves it hanging back so we can see her pretty face fall off. The one idiot starts squinting and covering his eyes when the snow/sleet starts falling even though he has goggles on his fucking head unused. You might think, it's plausible that he could have forgetten them and I might have gone along with that if those very same goggles weren't the first thing he thought to throw down to try and get the workers attention. I understand it's common for people to complain about stupid characters in films like this but even my 3 year old knows to put his hood up when it's cold out.
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