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What Make The Critics
Of Starz’ SPARTACUS:
BLOOD AND SAND??

I am – Hercules!!


A new low-budget look at the Thracian soldier turned slave gladiator who eventually led a revolt against the Roman Republic (when Gaius Julius Caesar was maybe only 27 years old), “Spartacus: Blood and Sand” is one of two new series launching tonight overseen by a former “Buffy The Vampire Slayer” writer-producer. Syfy has “Caprica” from Jane Espenson (though Espenson’s oversight of the show didn’t begin until next week’s second episode). And Starz has “Spartacus,” from Steven S. DeKnight, whose post-“Buffy” career includes stints on “Angel,” “Smallville” and “Dollhouse.”

“Spartacus” marks DeKnight’s debut as a showrunner. Big-screen director Sam Raimi is an executive producer, as he was on “Hercules” and “Xena” and is on “Legend of the Seeker.”

Obscure Welsh/Australian actor Andy Whitfield plays the title role. Bigger names like John Hannah (“The Mummy”) and Lucy Lawless (“Xena”) are among the supporting cast. There are loads of pay-cable nudity and “300”-style gore, and Lawless was good enough to bare her nipples for the first time anywhere.

Starz ordered a second season of the series a month before audiences saw its first episode – demonstrating perhaps how irrelevant ratings are to pay cable programmers.

Variety says:

… dreadful … What ensues, alas, is the gladiator's life as filtered through the gauzy lens of a Calvin Klein ad. Sure, there's some graphic sex and modest court intrigue among the haughty Romans, but nothing to approach the worst moments in HBO's "Rome." … earns a big, very bloody thumbs down.

The Hollywood Reporter says:

… With such thin stories each week, it's small wonder that sex and violence are used to take up the slack. … Andy Whitfield has the requisite physicality for the title role. Beyond that, it's hard to assess his performance because his character is so consistently two-dimensional. …

USA Today says:

… proof of TV's ever-expanding boundaries and ever-plummeting tastes. You've never seen anything quite like it on TV and, with luck, will never again anytime soon … Still, there's no denying that Spartacus does what it sets out to do fairly well — and in a way that doesn't duplicate anything else now on TV. …

Entertainment Weekly says:

… might prove to be the not-at-all-guilty pleasure of the season. …

The Los Angeles Times says:

… If the show's concerns do not rise far above the level of pulp -- and there is nothing wrong with that -- it does what it does with a sure hand. … Given that "Spartacus" does not stumble in what it sets out to do, one's objections to the show, if objections one has, will be moral, or simple matters of taste, to the extent that those two concerns can actually be separated. It is a little bloody for my taste, personally. …

The Chicago Tribune says:

… The quick way to describe "Spartacus" would be to call it an attempt to re-make the movie "300" as a TV show with a (much) smaller budget. That description is especially apt in the first episode, which is somewhat clunky, derivative and humorless. There's lots of slo-mo blood and gore, lots of sex, a washed-out color palette and some groan-inducing acting from the supporting cast. But the poetic and evocative dialogue works, amazingly enough (it's almost Shakespearean at times), and as the world of Spartacus is fleshed out (in more ways than one), the show develops momentum and the intrigues become more interesting. …

The Washington Post says:

… It's deliciously, marvelously bad, and I was helpless in its grip. … you can't help but laugh at the dialogue. Of course, with all these sweaty gladiators in loincloths, the whole thing can be viewed through a homoerotic prism, and "Spartacus: Blood and Sand" works extra hard to deflect that -- too hard, judging from the fact that all the men in it derisively refer to one another in epithets for a certain female body part. We get it guys, we get it. You are men and you kill. You slay me, Spartacus, that's for sure.

The San Francisco Chronicle says:

… An early - and leading - candidate for worst series of the decade … spectacularly awful - and not in a way that you'll want to rubberneck at for laughs or drinking-game derision. … Imagine watching a boring porn movie with swords, sandals, CGI, buckets and buckets of blood, and excessive slow-motion "action" scenes, all while Satan pulls your soul out of your backside. …

The Pittsburgh Post-Gazette says:

… There's not much room for character development in [Friday’s] battle-filled premiere. Next week's episode offers slightly more promise on that front, and episodes three and four show marked improvement. It's no "Rome," but at least it appears headed more in that direction. …

The Boston Herald says:

… How many times can you watch blood and teeth spew from a man’s mouth? How long do you want to linger on a man getting his throat sliced, his blood erupting in a shower of red that nearly covers the camera lens? Don’t get me thinking about what happens to one gladiator’s face in the fourth episode.

The Boston Globe says:

… either a fabulous spoof whose expert actors have perfected the art of amateur line delivery or employment for an epic cast of shockingly wooden thespians. It was written either by master satirists hoping to inspire viewer drinking games each time blood drops sail in slo-mo or by teen boys. My vote is for the latter in each case, especially the one where the writers are teen boys. …

10 p.m. Friday. Starz.




CHEAPEST LOST EVER!!
$16.99 Season One!!
$16.99 Season Two!!
$16.99 Season Three!!
$19.99 Season Four!!
$19.99 Season Five!!




In Orbit Now!!

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Reader Talkback

How many years since 300?
by ottomatic
Jan 22nd, 2010
03:38:09 AM
whoa whoa whoa... first time Xena nipples?
by ottomatic
Jan 22nd, 2010
03:40:35 AM
Lawless bared nip before...
by V'Shael
Jan 22nd, 2010
03:46:50 AM
And it's "Welsh" not "Welch" .... ffs.
by V'Shael
Jan 22nd, 2010
03:49:23 AM
V'Shael but are they in hd?
by ottomatic
Jan 22nd, 2010
03:53:26 AM
Critics may be savaging it... but bear in mind
by V'Shael
Jan 22nd, 2010
04:17:01 AM
Are they in HD? No idea. I didn't go the HD route.
by V'Shael
Jan 22nd, 2010
04:17:27 AM
Here ya go boys
by optimus122
Jan 22nd, 2010
04:27:14 AM
Sorry this should work
by optimus122
Jan 22nd, 2010
04:29:18 AM
Ahem
by optimus122
Jan 22nd, 2010
04:29:33 AM
AGAIN THIS ONE WORKS
by optimus122
Jan 22nd, 2010
04:37:38 AM
And yes
by optimus122
Jan 22nd, 2010
04:38:57 AM
it has to be said
by JonJonB
Jan 22nd, 2010
05:49:21 AM
No chance of comparing with Rome
by FrodoFraggins
Jan 22nd, 2010
06:17:22 AM
Rome was fantastic
by optimus122
Jan 22nd, 2010
06:28:07 AM
@Optimus : You're a legend.
by V'Shael
Jan 22nd, 2010
06:40:17 AM
Damn, was hoping it was more like "Rome"
by Jack Burton
Jan 22nd, 2010
06:56:25 AM
Who cars when Walking Dead will..
by Judge Briggs
Jan 22nd, 2010
07:06:36 AM
Cares*
by Judge Briggs
Jan 22nd, 2010
07:40:08 AM
Damn, this looked so good too
by Bruce of all Trades
Jan 22nd, 2010
07:55:27 AM
Thirteeeeeeeen!!!
by Billyeveryteen
Jan 22nd, 2010
07:57:26 AM
Comparing this turd to Rome
by Bruce of all Trades
Jan 22nd, 2010
08:10:06 AM
Judge Briggs
by Steve T
Jan 22nd, 2010
08:30:13 AM
ROME
by blackwood
Jan 22nd, 2010
08:47:23 AM
"wasn't the Spartan army filled with lovers?"
by V'Shael
Jan 22nd, 2010
09:18:03 AM
Spartans...
by Bumb48
Jan 22nd, 2010
09:25:04 AM
V'Shael
by blackwood
Jan 22nd, 2010
09:25:41 AM
I'm in
by Omar B
Jan 22nd, 2010
09:25:59 AM
Wait I found something on Wikipedia
by blackwood
Jan 22nd, 2010
09:30:20 AM
I must be in Horseville.
by we_pray_for_mad_skillz
Jan 22nd, 2010
09:38:13 AM
"These were a homo-ish people"
by harper54
Jan 22nd, 2010
09:52:46 AM
Bullshit. Spartan Women were the finest women in the world.
by Spacezilla
Jan 22nd, 2010
10:22:13 AM
LUCY LAWLESS MADE MY PEE-PEE HARD!
by SkidMarkedUndies
Jan 22nd, 2010
10:57:28 AM
Urmmm no
by Spike fan
Jan 22nd, 2010
11:03:36 AM
@Blackwood - Spartans
by V'Shael
Jan 22nd, 2010
11:04:33 AM
@Spike Fan - Even if you do use wikipedia...
by V'Shael
Jan 22nd, 2010
11:09:40 AM
And productive lectures are
by blackwood
Jan 22nd, 2010
11:10:54 AM
How many times can you watch blood and teeth spew
by FluffyUnbound
Jan 22nd, 2010
11:47:29 AM
@Blackwood : That's not to say they didn't have gay sex
by V'Shael
Jan 22nd, 2010
11:56:21 AM
Of course, you had that quote already.
by V'Shael
Jan 22nd, 2010
11:57:15 AM
Spacezilla
by The Garbage Man
Jan 22nd, 2010
11:57:23 AM
Also
by Colin62
Jan 22nd, 2010
12:51:24 PM
Fucking computer
by Colin62
Jan 22nd, 2010
12:54:20 PM
Saw it...
by SunTzu77
Jan 22nd, 2010
01:00:30 PM
constructive criticism...
by SunTzu77
Jan 22nd, 2010
01:18:35 PM
Sam and Rob got it right.
by SunTzu77
Jan 22nd, 2010
01:25:43 PM
First Episode of Spartacus is online
by SunTzu77
Jan 22nd, 2010
01:28:31 PM
Plutarch
by Colin62
Jan 22nd, 2010
01:48:14 PM
But
by Colin62
Jan 22nd, 2010
01:51:01 PM
These talkback is veering into the intelligent and infromative
by johnnyangel
Jan 22nd, 2010
01:57:59 PM
The truth is...
by SunTzu77
Jan 22nd, 2010
02:18:41 PM
Could have potential
by Moviegimp
Jan 22nd, 2010
03:15:25 PM
i am spartacus.
by alice133
Jan 22nd, 2010
03:43:44 PM
I miss Xena
by DOGSOUP
Jan 22nd, 2010
03:57:03 PM
How did we?
by Red_Right_Return
Jan 22nd, 2010
04:49:18 PM
When does Sarah M. Gellar show up?
by teethgnasher
Jan 22nd, 2010
04:58:32 PM
and I must be retarded...
by Red_Right_Return
Jan 22nd, 2010
05:00:22 PM
shop = show.
by Red_Right_Return
Jan 22nd, 2010
05:01:13 PM
Americans need to stop being prudes?
by MattmanReturns
Jan 22nd, 2010
05:06:43 PM
I am intrigued
by KrowNinja
Jan 22nd, 2010
05:15:01 PM
MattmanReturns
by Red_Right_Return
Jan 22nd, 2010
05:18:05 PM
And we ARE prudes..
by Red_Right_Return
Jan 22nd, 2010
05:21:51 PM
Sex vs Violence
by KrowNinja
Jan 22nd, 2010
05:32:27 PM
Ah sexual prudes... that we are
by MattmanReturns
Jan 22nd, 2010
05:36:59 PM
Enjoying violence does not make you insane
by MattmanReturns
Jan 22nd, 2010
05:42:21 PM

by KrowNinja
Jan 22nd, 2010
06:08:59 PM
KrowNinja, very well said
by MattmanReturns
Jan 22nd, 2010
06:11:22 PM
I don't get Blood & Sand until Monday :(
by buffywrestling
Jan 22nd, 2010
07:39:49 PM
We're not prudes????
by film11
Jan 22nd, 2010
07:55:29 PM
so did you watch it Herc?
by punto
Jan 22nd, 2010
08:29:09 PM
Dude, I loved Callisto.
by buffywrestling
Jan 22nd, 2010
09:07:34 PM
Just finished the first two episodes
by blackwood
Jan 22nd, 2010
09:47:43 PM
It's really not that bad.
by jolaz
Jan 22nd, 2010
09:57:47 PM
Jesus people, it's nipples
by Jaka
Jan 22nd, 2010
10:00:25 PM
Jaka
by blackwood
Jan 22nd, 2010
10:05:49 PM
blackwood
by Jaka
Jan 22nd, 2010
10:30:36 PM
"keep me close to your thighs...
by Jaka
Jan 23rd, 2010
12:52:18 AM
I'm having a hard time getting last the dialogue
by Bass Ackwards
Jan 23rd, 2010
01:17:33 AM
300 Stinks And Is Ruining All Action
by PTSDPete
Jan 23rd, 2010
08:59:38 AM
I just wanna hear a nude Lucy Lawless say . . .
by Royston Lodge
Jan 23rd, 2010
01:02:59 PM
Do they actually say "fuck", "cock", and "cunt" on this show?!
by Royston Lodge
Jan 23rd, 2010
01:04:27 PM
Rene O'Connor was in Alien Apocalypse
by Royston Lodge
Jan 23rd, 2010
01:05:16 PM
Fuck cock and cunt
by V'Shael
Jan 23rd, 2010
01:16:06 PM
Not too bad...
by Philvis
Jan 23rd, 2010
02:22:03 PM
@DOGSOUP
by bychance
Jan 23rd, 2010
02:46:37 PM
V'Shael: I'm totally taking you out of my will.
by Royston Lodge
Jan 23rd, 2010
04:25:22 PM
Xena bad? I would strongly disagree 1000 percent.
by jonsnow
Jan 23rd, 2010
04:52:42 PM
Game of Thrones will give us our Rome fix...
by TheWaqman
Jan 23rd, 2010
06:16:16 PM
if you think xena was a good show
by Waka_Flocka_Flame
Jan 23rd, 2010
09:06:32 PM
"THIS...IS...SPARTA!..cus"
by Darkman
Jan 23rd, 2010
09:50:17 PM
THIRTEEEENTH
by Abe_Vigoda
Jan 24th, 2010
01:35:57 AM
@Waka_Flocka_Flame
by bychance
Jan 24th, 2010
02:14:52 AM
Speaking of Spartacus, where the fuck's the Jean Simmons...
by BurnHollywood
Jan 24th, 2010
05:45:46 AM
@Royston Lodge : I'll put you in MY will,
by V'Shael
Jan 24th, 2010
04:06:34 PM
Whattayamean? Clearly, it's like rain on your wedding day.
by Royston Lodge
Jan 24th, 2010
06:39:05 PM
Shit
by grendel69
Jan 24th, 2010
08:00:26 PM
oh yea...
by grendel69
Jan 24th, 2010
08:13:27 PM
This needs more Kirk Douglas...now HE was Spartacus
by MrMysteryGuest
Jan 25th, 2010
01:01:09 PM
Watch Michigan State basketball instead.
by HoboCode
Jan 25th, 2010
02:35:26 PM
NOT, No Way, Uh Uh
by Hemi23
Jan 25th, 2010
06:56:52 PM
uzZotnN
by TmvEqK
Feb 11th, 2010
03:44:43 PM
YvPilXy
by TmvEqK
Feb 11th, 2010
03:45:39 PM
kBraEmE
by QcoIQh
Feb 11th, 2010
04:01:37 PM
DJhVyijq
by QcoIQh
Feb 11th, 2010
04:02:06 PM

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