Quint's Holiday Gift Guide 2009 Part 3! Collectibles! Art! Shirts and Apparel! Rich Stuff! And Food!?!
What's this? A new category? Yes and no. I came across something I thought would be very interesting, but doesn't exactly fit into any other category. Consider this a one-off.
There's a website called Foods Across America that specializes in bringing full meals from famous restaurants right to your front door. The above link is for the Carnagie Deli special... a Whole Corned Beef Brisket, their world-famous Cheesecake, bread and mustard and it runs $79.95. You can do anything, from a real Philadelphia Cheesesteak to Key Lime pie actually from Key West. The catch is that it's pricey and ships frozen, so you gotta brush up on your reheating skills for the warm foods, but I thought it was a way to make the holidays special for your family and friend. What's more romantic than Carnagie deli cheesecake? Fuckin' nothin'.
CHEAP ($24.99 and Under)
Geeky Wrapping Paper from ThinkGeek. There's many to choose from... zombies, binary, equations, robots and canhas (my favorite). Make your gift stand out this year! $5.99 a roll.
From the creators of last year's Ice Cube Titanic tray comes the hundred times geekier Space Invaders Ice Cube Tray. Seriously. And I mean that totally nonsarcastically. What a great, simple sweet idea.
Yep, that's certainly an Enterprise Bottle Opener. Don't know why it's almost twenty bucks, but I figured this would be a nice thinking-outside-the-box type geek for the Trek nerd in your group. $18.95.
An R2D2 Peppermill? Why not? They've turned the poor little guy into everything else... trash cans, Pespi machines, projectors... I gotta admit the peppermill idea is pretty clever... $19.99 over at ThinkGeek.
This Gentle Giant Boba Fett Bust can be had at a steal over at Entertainment Earth's site as part of their week of Black Friday sale. Great detail on this little guy and you can get him for only $9.99 plus shipping, but act fast. He's liable to sell out.
I had this great Kotobukiya statue on the Guide last year. The difference this year is this great statue, based on an early Ralph McQuarrie concept drawing, is part of Entertainment Earth's Black Friday sale where you can get it for half the price. This, in my opinion, is the hightest value item for your dollar in the Collectibles section. Only $49.99 plus shipping. Wow.
Dark Horse has put out a set of Uncle Scrooge figurines, hand painted and limited runs... Scrooge himself came out in September and is really hard to find. But this one has yet to be released and is my favorite of the bunch. Who would have thought we'd see a Magica De Spell collectible figure? $49.95 for pre-order, released 12/23/09.
Gotta give Dark Horse credit. I love that they went anti-geek mainstream with a Don Vito Corleone Bust. Not a bad likeness and a great price. Now if they really want to knock my socks off they'll do a Gene Hackman from The Conversation maquette... with bleeding toilet. A fountain! Somebody get on it! $59.99 plus shipping.
DC Direct's Black and White Joker statue, based on Jim Lee's design, caught my eye. I love the impossibly skinny vision of this evil and iconic character. Really sharp. $62.99 plus shipping.
The Alien Abduction Lamp was very popular when I included it in a previous Holiday Guide, but it was not released at the time of the guide. Now it's out and for $100 it can be yours... cow and all.
Rocketeer Disney Classic Hereos Statue. Awesome! The Nazis and gangsters all quake in fear of this statue. What a beautiful design and priced very competitively. , released this December!
I'm sorry, but these fucking things are scarier than anything Stephen King, John Carpenter or William Peter Blatty could come up with. The Flying Monkeys from The Wizard of Oz have given generations of children and grown-ups nightmares. Super early pre-order if you dare have something like this in your house... It's released May 2010, but I had to include it... if I didn't it might come for me in the middle of the night... $124.99.
This is another May 2010 pre-order, but I love this piece. The flow, the scene depicted, the detail. Great stuff from Gentle Giant.$238.99.
I thought this classic Blue and Yellow suit Wolverine from Sideshow was pretty killer. Another pre-order and pricey, but the craftmanship of Sideshow's stuff is always worth the extra green. $289.99.
I don't know what this says about me, but the moment I saw this at the end of Iron Man I wondered how long it'd be before we saw a collectible based on Pepper Potts' gift to Tony Stark. And now I know. Love it. It's on pre-order, but released next month! The only way it'd be cooler is if you could have the option of having your name put in place of Tony Stark's. $149.99.
It's odd how much Snow White stuff is on the list this year. It wasn't intentional, I assure you. I just thought this piece from Sideshow, a limited edition of 300, perfectly captured the Disney villainess. Released 1st Quarter 2010, on pre-order for $299.99.
Count me shocked to see Disney acknowledge The Black Cauldron at all, let alone have a bust of The Horned King. I have fond memories of seeing this movie in the theater as a kid and being scared out of my mind. I haven't revisited it since... maybe that's for the best... $79.99.
Captain Hook, another great Disney villain and one of my personal favorites. Great sculpt by Enesco, LLC... released through Sideshow. In stock, but close to being sold out. $74.99.
Alright, this is kind of cruel. That awesome 12" Dutch is badass, but unfortunately sold out. There is a glimmer of hope in the form of Sideshow's wait list. Sign up! Do it! Do it now!!! Get to da choppahhhhh! $149.99.
This figure, also from Hot Toys, is fantastic and still available, albeit through pre-order. The release is set for January 2010, so it could still be a good holiday gift. For yourself... or others... Whatever, I won't tell anyone you bought a doll for yourself. That's cool. $194.99.
Smaug The Golden based on John Howe's illustration done in faux bronze by those talented folks at Weta. Faux bronze so us lowly peons might be able to afford it... the Bronze version costs $4,500.00, so give thanks there's a close to attainable figure for the faux bronze. It is badass, thought, right. On pre-order for $430.00.
Eowyn & Nazgul Faux Bronze... I love the action of this piece. The above picture doesn't do it justice. Click there and see the zoomable pics at Weta's site. Great moment from a great film. $430.00.
I preordered this the second I saw it available on Entertainment Earth's website. I'm an unabashed supporter of Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom, even if Spielberg and Lucas aren't. I love that movie, feel it's second only to Raiders in the series. It's Short Round! He very little, you cheat very big! It's released next month, in time for Christmas, and is on pre-order for $54.99.
I'm not crazy, that's awesome, right? There's a Raiders one as well (below)... it's not just my fanatical love of Temple of Doom and childlike happiness at seeing any collectible surrounding that movie is it? I think that's sweet as hell. $129.99.
Yeah, no. These statues are badass. Love the design and love that we get Forrestall's corpse! "He was good. He was very, very good." $131.99.
This is another piece of the great Entertainment Earth sale. The Great Gonzo lovingly reproduced by Master Replicas has a wire armiture inside so you can pose hime however you want. Almost half off at$149.99.
Nightmare Before Christmas Visemes Replica from Neca is a helluva showpiece. Fantastic off the wall collectible that's not just a scene recreation, but a recreation of all the different heads used to make Jack Skellington come to life in Henry Selick and Tim Burton's movie. This is released next month in time for the Holidays... And at a good price, no less. $99.99.
Here's a nice Dark Crystal uRac Statue, newly released and limited to 1500 pieces worldwide. The uRac were always sad creatures to me, but this era Henson hits me dead center. Love it. $79.99.
To round out The Dark Crystal pieces here's the crown jewel of Mindstyle's line, a recreation of the iconic Castle from the film that stands 17" tall. It's on pre-order for $274.99.
Yep, it's time for some giveaways. The next three collectibles I will be giving away. Each one has a specific contest associated with it. All three are open to readers around the world and will have a brief trivia challenge associated with them. First up is from Sideshow!
Standing 16.5" tall is this kick-ass Black Suit Spider-Man "Comiquette" from Sideshow Collectibles. They retail for $242.99, but you can get yours for free.
There were hundreds of entries for this statue, but there could be only one winner! That winner is Scott Martin from the UK. Congratulations, Mr. Martin!
To win you must email me at firstname.lastname@example.org with the subject line Back in Black and the correct answer to these three questions:
- Name me the comic where the Black suit was first seen by readers? (this is a tricky one) [The common thought is Secret Wars #8, however that's the origin of the suit, not the introduction. The first appearance was Amazing Spider-Man 252. There is some thought that the first time anyone saw the Black Suit was in sketch form in Marvel Age #12... That's more of a news of the Marvel world publication than a comic, but I included the one or two people who cited that in the lottery for the winner to be fair.]
-Name me the surprise mastermind behind the Clone Saga and why it was such a shock when he/she/it was revealed. [The Jackal was the obvious answer, but he was just a pawn of one Mr. Norman Osborn, thought to have been killed over 20 years previous. The Green Goblin's return was the big surprise to end the Clone Saga.]
-Specifically, where does Cletus Kasady come into contact with Venom's offspring and what does he become when that happens? Cletus shares a cell with Venom on Ryker's Island and becomes Carnage.]
The contest is open right this very minute and ends 4pm CST this afternoon, November 26th. I will gather every correct answer and pick a winner at random. If there is only one person who gets the trivia questions right then he or she is the winner. I will also need your mailing address in the event you win, so don't forget to include that.
Here's some legal stuff from Sideshow:
Delivery for the contest winner:
**The winner must allow 4-6 weeks after announcement of win to receive the product from Sideshow Collectibles. All prizes are non-transferable, with no cash redemptions and/or substitutions except at Sponsor's sole discretion. See below for more International Shipping Terms. To get the latest news from Sideshow Collectibles, join our Newsletter!
Delivery time & Restrictions:
All continental US orders are shipped via either UPS or FedEx ground service. Because FedEx cannot provide tracking numbers for P.O. Boxes, Sideshow Collectibles will not ship to a P.O. Box. Please provide your street address or your shipment will be delayed. For FedEx Ground deliveries, please allow up to 6 business days for delivery from the date your order is shipped.
International Shipping Restrictions:
At this time Sideshow Collectibles is unable to make shipments to Venezuela or Nigeria. Please Click Here for further international shipping information and restrictions.
All taxes are the responsibility of the winner. All prizes are non-transferable, with no cash redemption and/or substitutions except at Sponsor's sole discretion. All international winners will be responsible for any duties, tariffs, taxes or import fees assessed to their prize. Further, some countries outside of the U.S. do not have reliable mail services. In the event that a prize has been stolen or mishandled during shipment to an international destination, Sideshow may not be able to replace the specific item and will substitute a prize at its own discretion. If the winner prefers a specific quicker shipping method, they are responsible to notify Sideshow immediately, and will also be responsible to cover the additional costs if any. At this time, we do not accept credit cards from Mexico. Refer to our Help Desk for alternative payment options.
Yep, Weta's giving me one Ray Gun to give away. They decided to make a slightly more consumer friendly version of their high-end Ray Guns with this Particle Smasher called The Righteous Bison. Instead of being made of metal, they're made of plastic, but the craftmanship that goes into each one is still evident. This retails for $99.00 and one lucky Holiday Gift Guide reader will win it.
Again, it's available to people all over the world. To enter you must follow me on Twitter. At a certain point tomorrow (Friday, November 27th) I will post a tweet that says "Holy shit, there's a huge behemouth charging us!" The first person following me to reply "Never fear! I have a ray gun and shall zap him between the eyes!" will win this badass raygun. Simple enough?
I'll post the name of the winner here for those not on the evil Twitter machine. Good luck!
This is my absolute favorite of the Weta Halo line. It's on sale right now for $199.00, the retail price being $225. Cortana has never looked better and it's just simply a beautifully designed sculpt.
The winner has been pulled and it is Josh Parra of Arizona! Congratulations, Josh!
To win this you need to email me at email@example.com with the subject line Halo Dolly! (with the exclamation point) and the correct answer to all the trivia questions below:
- Who voices Cortana in the Halo video games? [Jen Taylor.]
- Who directed the CG animated "Starry Night"commercial promoting Halo 3 and what geek project is this person currently directing? [Joseph Kosinski and he's directing Tron: Legacy.]
- Name me the two geek-worshipped directors who were at one point attached to helm the Halo movie. [This was the one that knocked a lot of people out of the running. The answer is Guillermo del Toro and Neill Blomkamp. Spielberg and Jackson have never been attached as directors, only producers.]
- What awesome character actor voices the Arbiter in the Halo series and name me the actor/wrestler that he got into the best knock-down, drag-out brawl in film history? [Keith David and Rowdy Roddy Piper in They Live!]
The contest is open from now until 4pm CST. I will gather all the entries that get all the trivia questions right and pick a winner at random. Be sure to include your shipping address should you win.
CLOTHING and APPAREL
CHEAP ($24.99 and Under)
I'm starting off Clothing and Apparel with a selection of shirts from a site called Fright-Rags that specialize in horror shirts. But these aren't those lame shirts you see sold at conventions that just recreate video box covers. These are all artist driven. I own and wear every single one of the shirts I'm about to link.
Before you start clicking, though, the guys behind Fright-Rags have extended a special discount code just for AICN readers. If you buy any shirt you can get an extra 10% off when entering AICN10 in the coupon code box upon checkout. Each one of these shirts starts at $16.95 and only goes up in price if you order a 4X or 5X.
When I wore this shirt for the first time a random dude stopped on the street, looked at my shirt, looked up at me and said "Hail Satan" and walked on. If it were me and I didn't know who Pennywise was I probably just would have screamed and ran with my arms flailing, but that's just me.
Totally badass Wicker Man shirt, right? Love the use of color. Oh, spoiler...
Killer Klowns FTW!
I love this The Thing shirt. Creepy, cool and badass... just like the movie.
Thanks to the guys at Fright-Rags for the discount.
Marty McFly hat!!! Well, technically it's his kid's hat from Back to the Future 2, but you know what I mean. This is put out by Diamond Select and runs a cool $21.39 plus shipping.
Stay warn will your feet this winter. Yes they will be... they wiiiiilllll bbbeeeeee.... $29.99 plus shipping they are.
The iconic Badass Cinema shirt, which has become synonymous with The Alamo Drafthouse Cinema, is the first of a run of MondoTees shirts. Mondo has also given me a discount code for you guys. Use the code AICN upon checkout and receive 15% off your order! This is good for all Mono T-Shirts and Posters! I'll put a reminder in the Art category. $20.00
Chaos Reigns is the resounding battle cry of this year's Fantastic Fest, inspired by the sheer WTFness of Lars Von Trier's ANTI-CHRIST. You've heard it screamed by Nacho Vigalondo, now you can wear it on your chest! $20.00.
I love this Big Trouble In Little China shirt giving some love to the storms, usually pushed into the background by the awesomeness that is Jack Burton. $25.00.
It seems right to end the run of MondoTees shirts with the I Heart TX shirt modeled after the great, but pulled by the studio teaser poster for Jason Takes Manhattan. And the Austin area behing home to Leatherface, the shirt is just about perfect. $25.00.
Neckties made from Cassette tapes. A great conversation starter for you more businessy types, yeah? $90.00.
This Batman Utility Belt from DC Direct is pretty old-school cool, yeah? Made with faux leather, gold-plated buckle and comes with a metal display shelf. Not released until June 2010, but on pre-order for $279.99.
I just creeped myself out... Yes, this is a replica of the famous Leather Jacket Arnie wears in The Terminator... super cool, great idea... looks great... but the second I got to this item in the guide my iTunes started playing the Terminator theme... out of 1520 songs that theme hits just now. Bizarre... Anyway, awesome replica that can actually be put to some practical use. $269.99.
This item started as an April Fool's Joke where the punchline ended up being the very real and very large demand for a TaunTaun Sleeping Bag. So here it is. My favorite part is the plush lightsaber zipper-pull. Brilliant. This is backordered, but the second shipment is arriving soon at ThinkGeek and they expect it to sell out, so now's the time if you want to own the TaunTaun Sleeping Bag. $99.99 plus shipping.
There's quite a few MondoTees posters included in this section. The good folks at Mondo have given AICN readers a 15% discount when using the promotional code AICN upon checkout. That code is good on anything you buy. For clarification purposes, the Mondo posters below are the Alfredo Garcia, Night of the Creeps, Blacula, Rolling Thunder, Rocky Horror, Susperia, Neverending Story and Medusa prints.
CHEAP ($24.99 and Under)
Nothing says Merry Christmas like Bettie Page, right? This Limited Edition Jim Silke Art Portfolio is put out by Dark Horse and contains 6 prints of the Queen of Pin-ups. $14.99 plus shipping.
Dynamic Forces has this great Secret Wars Alex Ross Lithograph on sale for $24.98 plus shipping, half off. There's nothing like Alex Ross' work and this is from a particularly entertaining run of Marvel comics. All the best of the Marvel U are represented.
Mondo's Bring Me The Head of Alfredo Garcia Poster is the bee's knees. It reminds me of Polish movie poster art... kind of abstract, but perfect. Real art. Only 40 available at $30.00.
Mondo's Blacula rules, as usual. Great flick, great art. $25.00.
Mondo's Night of the Creeps glows in the dark. 'Nuff said. $30.00.
Mondo's Neverending Story poster isn't my favorite type of art in the world, but I love the movie so much I don't care. I mean, it has the Rock Biter, Falcor and the Ivory Tower on it... all it needs is the stupid bat. Limited printing of 95. $25.00.
Mondo's Rocky Horror Picture Show posters come as a set of two, one poster featuring Frank 'N Furter and the other featuring Columbia. Hand printed and hand numbered by artist Ken Taylor they'll run ya' $40.00 for the pair.
Mondo's Rolling Thunder Poster is just the tits. If you've seen the movie you know why it's so awesome to have a limited poster out for it. One of the best revenge movies of all time getting its due. Hand numbered poster by Print Mafia. $30.00.
Mondo's Suspiria poster is by artist Alan Forbes and boy is it creepy. Signed and numbered by Forbes in a limited edition of 115, this sweet-ass 18X24 poster will run ya' $30.00.
Gallery 1988 has this awesome print by artist Kirk Demarais available. It's called The Johnsons and it's an awesome family portrait featuring Navin Johnson and his poor, but happy family. The 11X14 print is limited to 100 copies running $65.00. Find your special purpose and snatch one of these up by emailing Gallery88 or calling them at 323-937-7088.
The last Mondo Print is a sweet Medusa. This is extremely limited, each one is hand painted by artist Skinner with watercolor and spray paint, signed and numbered. Only 20 of this particular version are available. There's another run of only 10 called Night Hag and 10-run called Fire Witch. $75.00 per print.
The above is a limited edition giclee printing of an oil painting by one Mr. Ray Bradbury. Called Dark Carnival, this giclee is limited to 200 pieces, each one 18X24 and each one is signed by Bradbury. $300.00.
I was struck by Brian Rood's when sifting through the art section of Entertainment Earth's catalogue. Unfortunately this giclee on canvas is out of stock, but the site promises that's only temporary. The piece is called Resolve and it's pretty damn impressive if you ask me. $245.83.
How about one more Indiana Jones Giclee? This one's called Have the Adventure of Your Life Keeping Up With the Joneses and is done by artist Eric Tan. 21X10, this giclee on paper is limited to 195 pieces and will be released next month. It can be pre-ordered for $149.99.
How awesome is this Incredibles Giclee? Limited to 150 pieces it's another piece of sweetness from Eric Tan and released by Acme Archives. It's also released next month and can be pre-ordered for $164.99.
FOR THE SUPER RICH ONLY
Avatar AMP suit from Sideshow kicks off their line of Avatar merch. I almost pulled this because I misread the description and thought it was a full-sized replica of the powersuits from the movie. At $1199.99 that'd be a good deal. It's not full-sized, but it is still badass, so here it is. For almost $1200 it better shit out some silver dollars or grant you a few wishes or something...
So, this is basically the coolest work chair ever... or the missing link between us now and the fat blob humans in Wall-E. The Warrior is scorpion-like with the tail being 3 19" High Def monitors. The tail raises and lowers allowing you to sit and work. You get a web-cam, iPod dock, 5.1 surround sound, a comfy reclining chair, a rotating base, a HEPA air purifier, it's own lighting, laptop docking station, a touchpad that controls the tilt of the seat, the rotation and the inclination.
All for the low Low price of $39,950. I heard a rumor Harry was going to get each of his editors one of these... and by "I heard" I mean "I'm starting."
What you see above you is an F-4 Phantom Jet Ejector seat made into a barstool by MotoArt who specialize in making furnature out of airplane parts. Check out this crazy-awesome desk built out of a Douglas DC-8 Cowling:
That's not all. They also make beds:
That bed is called The Mile High Bed, by the way.
Now you know this is for The Super Rich Only when they won't even list their prices, instead you have to apply to find out how much each costs. That's gotta be some serious bread. It's the cool furniture equivalent of ordering off a menu without any prices. It's going to be ungodly expensive.
This next run of super rich geek furniture comes from a website of a guy named Tom Spina who restored Bob Burns' original David Werewolf prop from An American Werewolf in London. His site has a lot of original creations, like the above steampunk table, and some stuff you just might recognize. I don't have pricing on the steampunk table, but judging by the rest of the items for sale on that site it's in the thousands. Like this cool as shit bar:
The T-Rex Bar will run ya' $4,999. Hey, you can pull up you F-4 Phantom barstool/ejector seat and have yourself a blended gold dust smoothie. You might recognize this chair...
Slightly Palpatine-ish isn't it? It'll cost you $5499.99 Galactic Credits. The coolest thing, though, is this table... which you can comission Mr. Spina to build for you, but to find out how much it'll cost you gotta visit his site and contact him. You'd be king Nerd of Geek Mountain if you owned this table, though.
Brilliant, right? Bet it looks just as great in person. I could never ever ever ever ever ever afford something like that, but I can admire it from afar.
Well, that brings 2009's Holiday Shopping Guide to a close. I haven't compared it to the previous years yet, but it felt like the biggest guide yet. With code it clocked in at 104 pages in MS Word.
I hope you folks found some good stuff in there. If you'll excuse me, I gotta go get ready for Thanksgiving with friends and family before I collapse into a twitching heap of satisfied exhaustion.
Happy Holidays and thanks for reading.
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Click here for Part 2 of the Gift Guide covering DVDs, Blu-Rays, Video Games and Toys!
Readers Talkbackcomments powered by Disqus
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Nov. 26, 2009, 10:22 a.m. CST
Nov. 26, 2009, 10:23 a.m. CST
Nov. 26, 2009, 10:47 a.m. CST
That thing does NOT look comfy!
Nov. 26, 2009, 10:47 a.m. CST
Temple of Doom is the greatest Indiana Jones film. <p> Discuss.
Nov. 26, 2009, 11:01 a.m. CST
Like The Jerk painting, and Indy on the bed...but most of this stuff is a bit too geeky for me.
Temple Of Doom is *not* the greatest Indiana jones film.<p> End of discussion.
Nov. 26, 2009, 11:04 a.m. CST
...not sure if I'd want to risk getting E.Coli, though.
Chakraborty, yep I think I could happily live with the T Rex fossil bar, but the rest of this stuff is too geeky. Who would want that Tony Stark has a heart thing?? I mean if it was the actual prop from the film maybe you gotta story to tell guests, but otherwise you'd just look like a weirdo.
Nov. 26, 2009, 11:09 a.m. CST
...should be a page out the book, "How to Lose Friends and Alienate People".
Nov. 26, 2009, 11:20 a.m. CST
and it turned out the movie was godawful.
STFU, Mola Ram was a 'masterful villain'?!<p> He was just a cut-price version of THE SWORD & THE SORCERER badguy, with less suction on his heart sucking.
Nov. 26, 2009, 11:34 a.m. CST
I'm exhausted from reading the list. Great statues this year.
Nov. 26, 2009, 11:34 a.m. CST
Nov. 26, 2009, 11:35 a.m. CST
by Bass Ackwards
I never really got it, it's not original advertising material and it's not artwork made by anyone asociated eith the original movies, so is it basically just fan art professionally printed up? And thanks for these articles, I'm definitely one the people who looks forward to them every year
Nov. 26, 2009, 11:39 a.m. CST
only question is does it actually have green joker hair?
Nov. 26, 2009, 12:01 p.m. CST
Nov. 26, 2009, 12:34 p.m. CST
Nov. 26, 2009, 12:48 p.m. CST
They are making money off of other people's properties... could be trouble if they don't have the proper permissions.
Nov. 26, 2009, 12:56 p.m. CST
by Spandau Belly
means you are crazy
Nov. 26, 2009, 1:21 p.m. CST
Happy Holidays to you and yours!
Nov. 26, 2009, 1:27 p.m. CST
Nov. 26, 2009, 1:39 p.m. CST
by Karl Childers
I would've loved that Raiders statuette, but it was ruined by the retitling, "Indiana Jones and The Raiders of the Lost Ark". Can he not leave anything sacred alone?
Nov. 26, 2009, 2:06 p.m. CST
...in the first film you have Belloq, a pussy who is involved in no action and gets others to do the fighting for him. In Last Crusade you have Walter Donavan, another pussy involved in no action. And in the final one you have Cate Blanchett...a villain with a pussy. Mola Ram is leaps and bounds above the other Indy villains in terms of bad-assery. You would argue otherwise?
Nov. 26, 2009, 2:33 p.m. CST
this is awesome and happy thanksgiving to all
Nov. 26, 2009, 2:34 p.m. CST
lol what the fuck? that's bizarre
Nov. 26, 2009, 2:35 p.m. CST
Nov. 26, 2009, 2:36 p.m. CST
STFU, harsh but fair.<p> Chakra, my fave Indy villain was that big bald Nazi fucker at the plane. "YOU DER! KUMMON DERDER!"
Nov. 26, 2009, 3:20 p.m. CST
BEST MOVIE EVER!
Nov. 26, 2009, 3:22 p.m. CST
...because my 2nd favorite villain is the large Thuggee guard who dukes it out with Indy on the conveyor belt and eventually gets crushed by the rock smasher...who happens to be the same person as the Nazi from Raiders. 3rd is bald nazi with glasses from Raiders. But these guys were really more of henchmen than villains.
Nov. 26, 2009, 3:22 p.m. CST
Amazing direction, greatest stunts and set pieces ever, genuinly funny thrill ride. I love this movie! FUCK THE HATERS, TOD rules.
Nov. 26, 2009, 3:54 p.m. CST
Nov. 26, 2009, 4:03 p.m. CST
The evil queen-wow. I would say the strongest department this year.
Nov. 26, 2009, 6:02 p.m. CST
For the discriminating rich, sick zombie fan.
Nov. 26, 2009, 6:03 p.m. CST
I still wouldn't say it's the best Indy film, great movie nonetheless though
Nov. 26, 2009, 9:31 p.m. CST
by Bob Loblaw Law Blog
I know it takes you forever to put all of this together, but damn it's cool. Thanks so much!
Nov. 26, 2009, 9:38 p.m. CST
Mola Ram was the biggiest pussy in all the Indy movies!!! He runs away from Indy in the temple, and he sends his guards out to the bridge. He doesn't fight Indy until they're slammed against the rock, and even then he betrays Shiva.
Nov. 27, 2009, 2:38 a.m. CST
Yes, Mola Ram evaded Indy in the temple while laughing...but he's the only villain out of all of the main villains who actually gets into a brawl with Indy, exchanging punches, and almost tears out Indy's heart, no less. Belloq, Donavan, and Blanchett came nowhere near him in that regard. The rope bridge scene is really one of the greatest climaxes of all time, especially the first time you see it and you don't know what's going to happen. Mola Ram is much more frightening and maniacal than the other main villains who are really little more than collectors of antiquities.
Nov. 27, 2009, 10:02 a.m. CST
by Gungan Slayer
does anyone here at AICN ever buy any of the super rich stuff?
Nov. 27, 2009, 10:34 a.m. CST
Nov. 27, 2009, 12:51 p.m. CST
count me on board with that one.
Nov. 27, 2009, 12:52 p.m. CST
The nightclub opening is awesome. Willy Scott and all her squeamishness is worth it just for the spike chamber scene. If it had been Marion or someone like her that scene would never have worked.
Nov. 27, 2009, 1:03 p.m. CST
....and thats all i need
Nov. 27, 2009, 3:08 p.m. CST
Yep, STFU I think the villains post-Raiders have all been fairly forgettable and u seem to be in agreement.<p> Mola Ram is probably the most memorable in the sequels, but even he doesn't register deeply, and as for the baddies in LAST CRUSADE and CRYSTAL SKULL - who were they and does anyone care?<p> RAIDERS on the other hand had great villains, from Belloq, through to the Nazi hierachy and even down to the lower henchmen (the big bald nazi, and the guy who struggles with Indy in the speeding truck and punches his injuured arm).<p> However Belloq gets special praise. Not just for his fine acting but his dedication to the craft. The 'fly eating' is a far better blooper than Stormtroopers banging their heads on the door or any other odd moments that made it to the screen.
Nov. 27, 2009, 4:10 p.m. CST
...in the sense that he was Indy's peer, and it kept things in perspective in the sense that Indiana Jones is an archeologist, not a super hero. But... I'd still say he was a pussy. He couldn't get laid, or even find his own girl, without the use of force. He didn't get involved in a single bit of action, but cowered with his new lady friend (who despised him) while the nazis did all the work, and he screamed like a bitch when he number was up. Yeah, he was a pussy...but a smart pussy.
Nov. 27, 2009, 4:27 p.m. CST
...I think I'd have to agree that Raiders is the best, while TOD is the best of the sequels. Still, the ending to Raiders always bothered me slightly in the sense that all the baddies die and Indy survives only because he kept his eyes closed. And how did he know to do that? He was pursuing the Ark as vehemently as Belloq. And in Indy 3 and 4, this theme is repeated too many times, of the villain being killed by the supernatural antiquity because of their greed and lust for power. That theme was driven into the ground, and Indy still hadn't learned. At least in TOD, Mola Ram and Indy duke it out before the shiva stones burn Mola's hands sending him falling to the alligators. And Indy was trying to save the villages, an altruistic motive (despite his private agenda of fortune and glory) and manages to do so in the end. In the rest, the antiquities are lost. <p> I'm gonna have to watch these this weekend.
Chakra, Indy gets the Ark and the Stones. But he doesn't get the Holy Grail ('Let it go Indiana'). Fair enough, would have been kinda insane if he's retrieved that one.<p> Does he get the Crystal Skull? (only seen it once at the cinema and forgotten whether he gets the goodies). Hang on, doesn't he have the Crystal Skull the whole way through? Was Mac a goodie or a baddie? Aw, fuck - pls don't say ive gotta watch that movie again. What a fucking mess.
Nov. 27, 2009, 5:15 p.m. CST
It's probably best if we spoke of the Indy films as if the 4th one didn't exist.
Nov. 27, 2009, 5:25 p.m. CST
Renee??? When Marion calls him Renee it's like she's talking to one of her girlfriends.
Nov. 27, 2009, 8:04 p.m. CST
I dunno, I thought the SS Colonel from the Last Crusade was pretty good.<p>"Zis is how ve say goodbye in Germany!" *Crack!*
Nov. 27, 2009, 8:20 p.m. CST
So evil he was neglecting his guests! Not only would he sell his mother for an Etruscan lamp, but he sold his soul to the slime of humanity! C'mon, his "way of the dodo" speech is tits.
Nov. 27, 2009, 11:26 p.m. CST
Is that Steve Martin in the middle?
Nov. 28, 2009, 7:02 a.m. CST
When I picture it in a real home, unless the inside of your house looks like a space ship, which at that point, go nuts!
Nov. 28, 2009, 9:23 a.m. CST
....tried to steal Indy's girl, Willie, the way Belloq was after Marion. Inviting Willie to Mola Ram's private chamber to give her wine and a new dress while calling her "Mon Cherie", LOL. I think 1984 audiences would have been more offended by that than they were of a heart being ripped out of someone's chest.
Nov. 28, 2009, 11:07 a.m. CST
...for the first time in a while, and man, that movie is so freaking awesome. For a sequel to such a great movie like Raiders, it delivers something so dark and original. It's like Indy going to the depths of Hell, with them underground surrounded by the skulls, flames and molten lava, the red lighting and Mola Ram with his horned hat and cult of Kali, and Indy himself forced to drink blood and become evil. TOD is to Raiders as Empire is to Star Wars, although I think Raiders and TOD are somewhat equal. <p> And the final third of the film is all action! From the moment Willie is being lowered into the lava, to fighting the thugees, rescuing the children, Indy's brawl with the big guard, the train cart chase, and the rope bridge climax. The only lull is on the rope bridge, where the tension and suspense is amped up before the final act. It's a great fucking movie.
Nov. 29, 2009, 12:41 a.m. CST
Not even a little. In fact I have clear memories of thinking they looked really fake as a child. Smaug is indeed bad effing ass! But Short Round doesn't really look like Short Round, and that annoys me. Temple is also my favorite Indy film. "Resolve" is pretty cool, methinks. The Palpatine chair looks WAY more coolish to me than the Han table. But if I had the cash to buy one of them I could probably afford to just pull the chair on up to the table in my office, effectively scaring the shit out of anyone I was meeting. Just sit there with my arms crossed, grinning. lol The black scorpion chair in now my lifes goal. However, since that's not really very likely, I'ma try and get me a Medusa Fire-Witch.
Nov. 29, 2009, 11:35 a.m. CST
Last Crusade seems to get allot of late because of the humor in the movie, but I love it, for one thing the cinematography in it is just plain beautiful (but so was the cinematography in Raiders and Temple Of Doom)
Nov. 29, 2009, 11:58 a.m. CST
by Karl Childers
...but it suffered from turning Sallah and Brody both into bumbling oafs. (Which is sadly what happened to Indy in the 4th one.)
Nov. 29, 2009, 12:53 p.m. CST
Nov. 29, 2009, 12:56 p.m. CST
that scene with Indy's speech "The hell you will. He's got a two day head start on you, which is more than he needs. Brody's got friends in every town and village from here to the Sudan, he speaks a dozen languages, knows every local custom, he'll blend in, disappear, you'll never see him again. With any luck, he's got the grail already." and then cut to Marcus fumbling around like an idiot is hilarious
Nov. 29, 2009, 12:57 p.m. CST
Sling Blade is an awesome movie
I just think Lucas feels the need to have to have comic relief in his films and it feels too forced.
Nov. 29, 2009, 1 p.m. CST
by Karl Childers
I have ELP stuck in my head due to your own.
Nov. 29, 2009, 1:12 p.m. CST
I'll show Last Crusade love as it's my second favorite of the series. For whatever reason I didn't see Raiders for years and years. Temple was first for me and I'll always love that film. Raiders may be better, but I like Temple and Crusade more. Can't always explain these things - it's just how I feel about them (my opinion). I have not seen the 4th one yet - I won't until it's on cable. Really not even excited to watch it then.<br><br> Wth happened to Lucas? How many times has that been asked. And really, does anybody who has actually done so little to please geeks have as much geek cred as that guy? SW is his baby, so I guess that gives him a forever-pass on messing up. But honestly, who wouldn't like to see him go back to attempting something like THX-1138? Something austere and serious, without any forced comic relief (which I totally agree he tries to do for reasons that do not serve the films he's making in any way).
Nov. 30, 2009, 4:20 a.m. CST
He says something like, "Hitler wants an everlasting army to take over the world. He's welcome to it. But I want the grail itself. Hitler can have the world but he can't take it with him. I'm going to be drinking my health after he's gone the way of the dodo." <p> So, he plans to take the cup and become immortal. But how on earth does he plan to keep that cup out of Hitler's hands? The cup doesn't make someone superhuman, and a 12 year old from Brooklyn is stronger than Walter Donovan and could wrestle that cup out of his hands. His plan is idiotic.
Nov. 30, 2009, 4:30 a.m. CST
It's definitely a good movie, and comparison to the 4th one proves that. But yes, a little too jokey and corny. The worst, for me, is when Indy is about to fuck Ilsa, they are on the floor going at it, he stops, lifts his head up and says, "Ah, Venice." What the fuck? Indy was never that lame...to stop as he's about to fuck some chick to suddenly wax poetic about Venice??? He might as well have been looking at the camera and winking. <p> Also, Crusade is a bit too much of a carbon copy of Raiders. Another biblical archeological item, Nazis again, and the baddies being killed because of their greed for power. Also, the leap of faith test at the end where the plank to cross the chasm would only have matched up at a certain time of the day when the sunlight and shadows matched the shadows below.
Nov. 30, 2009, 9:18 a.m. CST
It's what killed Mad Max.<p>There's a reason Shortround is called the Jarr-Jarr of Indy.
Billy, you have a valid point.<p> I wouldn't say TOD was 'ruined' but it was certainly 'afflicted' with the dreaded children-itis.<p> Same disease that took T2. Whiny bitch Furlong teaching Uncle 'thumbs up' Arnie how to wuv.<p> ps. Chakra, you're right about Walter Donovan. He had a plan but he didnt have a clue. Moral of this story is never rely on a wanker called Walter.
Nov. 30, 2009, 11:21 a.m. CST
...no love for the honest-to-God Original Star Trek Captain's Chair? The hell? Granted, up there with the rich-blood stuff, but at least you can find out what the price is!
Nov. 30, 2009, 11:25 a.m. CST
...and it's called Raiders of the Lost Ark. Anything else that might *appear* to be a sequel is actually just some limp-dick bastard's idea of what an Indiana Jones movie should be.
Nov. 30, 2009, 5:49 p.m. CST
...what kind of fucked up life is he leading? So he has earned eternal life, and he's going to spend that eternity watching a bunch of cups. He no food to gnash on, nowhere to exercise, no books to read, no friends, and no woman. He must be seriously bored and depressed. Not a day must go by in his fucked up existence where he doesn't ponder suicide. That's more of a curse than a blessing.
Dec. 1, 2009, 3:36 a.m. CST
Dec. 2, 2009, 1:42 p.m. CST
as i finished this column, something occurred to me that i've been suspicious of in the past. but now, it's official.<p> in my, say, 5 years of visiting the site, you have become by far my fave AICN editor. i feel like you and I had the same fucking childhood. it's scary.<p> cheers, sir. great column this year...
Dec. 15, 2009, 7:10 p.m. CST
Or does it jerk you off itself. The 3 screens for porn are perfect.
Feb. 15, 2010, 2:49 a.m. CST
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Feb. 15, 2010, 2:49 a.m. CST
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