Merrick here...


Many people don't realize that the mighty Massawyrm has himself a woman...a lovely wife who is sweet, smart, unassuming, and one of the awesomest folks you'll ever meet. She puts up with Massa while regularly...and graciously... tolerating an unending torrent of AICN-related absurdity without going bat-shit crazy. In other words, she should be nominated for Sainthood immediately.

Her name is Missuswyrm. She spent some time at Fantastic Fest this year, and sent in her thoughts on a few of the titles she checked out while there. Here's her perspective on HARD REVENGE MILLY, ZOMBIELAND, [REC] 2, and THE IMAGINARIUM OF DOCTOR PARNASSUS.

St. Missuswyrm. Has a nice ring, doesn't it?

HARD REVENGE MILLY and HARD REVENGE MILLY: BLOODY BATTLE

Meet Milly. She’s just your average mechanized Japanese woman with a shotgun in her leg and a thirst for revenge. Directed by Takanori Tsujimoto, Hard Revenge Milly and its sequel, Hard Revenge Milly: Bloody Battle, are set in the not-too-distant future when weapon control laws have been deregulated and Asia has become a hotbed of criminal activity. Finding themselves in the wrong place at the wrong time, Milly and her family become random victims of a particularly violent gang known as The Jack Brothers. After miraculously surviving the brutal attack, Milly is on a mission to avenge the senseless deaths of her husband and baby daughter.

These films are not for the squeamish, or for those who require a great deal of realism with their action. However, if you’re in the mood for a kick-ass little revenge film in which human bodies are turned into fonts of spewing blood, then Milly is your girl. This first film is short and sweet, with a runtime of only 44 minutes. It’s fast paced and action packed, giving us just enough background to understand why Milly is so hellbent on exacting her revenge. The fight scenes are fun, and there’s no skimping on the blood. This is a straight up, low-budget, post-apocalyptic romp with one of the most satisfying endings to a revenge movie I’ve ever seen.

The second movie picks up where the first one left off, after a thorough recap of part one. Having exacted her revenge on the Jack Brothers, Milly finds herself without a reason to live. Her life is directionless, an empty existence, and she’s being hunted by bad guys seeking revenge for Jack and his gang. Milly meets a young girl who wants her to help track down and kill her lover’s murderer. This is the first time we see an interaction between Milly and another character that doesn’t involve spilled blood. In this film, we get a little more insight into who Milly has become, and how she came by her deadly body. The added exposition makes this second installment is a bit slower than the first, but it still delivers gore-filled fight scenes and some impressive kills. Some of the trademark money shots of the first film, such as views of Milly’s face through her victims’ gaping wounds, persist in the sequel. While this particular gimmicky shot is a bit overused, it’s forgivable in films that never pretend to be anything but over-the-top action gore. All in all, Hard Revenge Milly and Hard Revenge Milly: Bloody Battle are good, bloody fun. So, I recommend you meet Milly. Just be sure you stay on her good side.

ZOMBIELAND

Dear Shaun,

I have a confession to make. I’ve seen someone else. You see, there’s this new zombie comedy movie in town, and well, I just couldn’t resist. I need to tell you something else, too, as I really think it’s important that we be honest with each other. There was a little, well, you know…romance. I know, I know, I didn’t expect it, it just sort of happened. I mean, the characters were so fun and colorful, they just swept me off my feet and took me for a wild ride across post-zombiegeddon America for a date at a theme park. We laughed, we shared a tender moment or two, we laughed some more. Oh boy, did we laugh. Oh, and I don’t want to make you feel like less of a man, but this new movie, it has bigger guns. Don’t worry, though. I mean, it’s not the size of your arsenal that counts, right? It’s how you use it. Speaking of that, man, can that Woody Harrelson shoot. Hot damn, but that man makes zombie killing look like an art form. He’s like a living video game, a perfectly choreographed ballet of carnage, and…oh, sorry, I got a little carried away. What I mean is, your gun is a good size, Baby, honest.

Anyway, I won’t lie, this movie was good. Really good. For a moment, I almost thought it was the funniest zombie comedy romance film ever. Just for a moment, though, I promise. I swear, I didn’t mean to cheat on you! The romance was all very sweet and innocent, I promise. I was charmed by this movie, but really, my heart belongs to you. You were my first RomComZom, and you never forget your first. People might compare you to this newcomer, but just know that, as funny as it is, it doesn’t take away from your glory. You are both funny, in your own ways, and I love you both. Can’t we all be friends?

[REC] 2

[Rec] 2 picks up right where [Rec] left off. The action continues when a SWAT team, led by a medical officer, enters the quarantined apartment building to collect information and control the situation. The SWAT team is in for a surprise, though, when they find out that the medical officer is not quite who they’d thought.

[Rec 2] is just as intense as the first, but adds another level to the fear as we find out just what our intrepid characters are up against. The first film owed it’s scariness to the suddenness at which normal people’s lives could become horror stories. One moment, your wife or daughter has what seems like a simple fever, and the next, your loved ones and neighbors have become mindless, violent killing machines and the police have locked you in the building with them. We, the audience, knew no more about the origin of the “infection” than did the characters, so we too were frightened by the unknown. In [Rec 2], we learn along with the SWAT team what is really going on in the building. The revelations are interesting and set the [Rec] movies apart from other films of the zombie variety.

While the second act is a little tedious, it’s is more than made up for by the first and third. If you enjoyed the frenetic energy of [Rec], you can look forward to more of the same, plus a delve into the mythos behind the madness. [Rec 2] is a must see for fans of its predecessor.

THE IMAGINARIUM OF DOCTOR PARNASSUS

Step right up, Ladies and Gentlemen, and let the The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus save your soul. Okay, so perhaps this film isn’t quite the key to salvation, but it IS a beautiful, imaginative, mind bending tale that offers the kind of thought provoking fun that is good for the soul. Christopher Plummer plays 1,000 year-old Dr. Parnassus, the leader of an antiquated traveling theater troupe, consisting of his daughter, Valentina (Lily Cole), Anton (Andrew Garfield), a master of sleight-of-hand, and Percy (Verne Troyer), the doctor‘s right hand man, without whom he‘d need a midget. They are soon joined by Tony (portrayed by Heath Ledger, Johnny Depp, Jude Law, and Colin Farrell), a mysterious stranger they find hanging by his neck beneath a bridge.

We soon learn that Dr. Parnassus owes his longevity to a deal with the Devil (Tom Waits), and he now owes the devil his due, in the form of his lovely, sixteen-year-old daughter. True to form, though, the Devil always has another deal, and Dr. Parnassus cannot refuse. The group soon finds themselves in a desperate bid to save the girl…

While not perfect, this film is a true gem and a must see for Gilliam fans. Gilliam creates a world in which the fantastical blends with the everyday realities of our modern world; where the forces of good and evil compete for our souls, while we go about our business, completely unaware. With but a step through Dr. Parnassus’ magic mirror, anyone can see their imagination, manifested in physical form. These dream world scenes are beautiful and very reminiscent of Gilliam’s early artwork. At times, I almost expected a giant foot to descend from the sky and squash our characters. The closest we get to that, however, are giant, glorious shoes that filled the imagination of a well-to-do woman.

The delves into these magical realms also provided Gilliam with an ingenious way to complete the film in spite of Heath Ledger’s untimely passing. Additional actors Johnny Depp, Jude Law, and Colin Farrell were cast to portray transformed versions of the Tony character when he has stepped through the mirror, while the original footage of Ledger is used to portray Tony when he is in the real world. This works to wonderful effect and comes off as an asset to the film, rather than as a fix to a problem. All three actors seem to honor Heath Ledger by playing versions of him as Tony, and are all careful to pay homage to his work, rather than outshine him. Not that upstaging Ledger’s performance would be an easy task. Though not as mind-blowing as his turn as the Joker, Ledger’s last performance was a solid testament to his skill as an actor.

Like any good fairytale, The Imaginarium of Dr. Parnassus is more than just a fun collection of lovely images and flights of fancy. It is an examination of the consequences of the choices we make in life, of the motivations of good and evil, and how we, as humans, deal with temptation. The story is a little dense at times, and some might find it muddled. If you require linear storytelling, this may not be the film for you. If, however, you want a beautifully shot, solidly acted, high concept film from the writers of The Adventures of Baron Munchausen, then you owe it to yourself to see The Imaginarium of Dr. Parnassus. The choice is yours. See you on the other side of the mirror.