Cool News
Michael Bay + Hot, Hunted, Alien Teens!! More Details On I AM NUMBER FOUR!!
Merrick here...
Last week we learned that DreamWorks was closing in on the rights to I AM NUMBER FOUR - a book-to-film project that Michael Bay would produce and possibly direct. That project was described thusly by THIS article in Variety:
The franchise is about a group of nine earthbound alien teens who escaped their planet just before it was destroyed by a hostile species. While the high school-aged kids assimilate, the title character discovers that he is being hunted by the enemy that blew up his planet.
The article goes on to extrapolate that one of the books' authors may be James Frey - who wrote A MILLION LITTLE PIECES (HERE
) - the author's highly controversial (and dubiously "true") account of his wrenching misadventures with drugs.
Now, FilmDrunk has uncovered more deatails on the project:
The protagonist is 15. The rival race of aliens are from the planet Mogadore. They destroyed Lorien in order to strip the planet of its natural resources because Mogadore was dying, and still is, and they followed the Loric to Earth to finish the job. The Loric develop their “Legacies” (special powers) around their fifteenth year. This first book is a kind of love story. At its core it’s a type of father/son alone in the world, always moving to stay alive story, a lá The Road.
...conveys THIS piece over at FilmDrunk.
And the CW Meter goes into complete overload...
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+ Expand All
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with Bay directing....therefore it will be loud and stupid but make a shitload of money.
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Bleh.
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Enough said.
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Complete with brooding into the camera.
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With that tagline, America will pay $200 million to see it in 5 days.
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Pull my finger.
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Wow, that website has finally hit the bigtime when you guys are borrowing stories from them. I figured you guys were just completely oblivious to its existence.
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yet another steaming pile of shit from Michael Bay! Come one come all! Err...I mean, Come morons and tasteless moviegoers! Even if he ends up only producing it, it'll suck, he's good like that.
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Jun 30, 2009 10:24:42 AM CDT
"At its core it’s a type of father/son alone in the world,...
by big jim
"...always moving to stay alive story, a lá The Road."Unless the world they are "alone" in is some post-apocalyptic wasteland and they are not actually "alone" I suspect it will be closer to "Escape to Witch Mountain" than "The Road".From the descriptions it seems like a cross between "Roswell" and "The Covenant".
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...take the worst elements of ROSWELL, SMALVILLE, X MEN, and every other spandexy, hunted, misunderstood, pimply, teen wish fulfillment fantasy...add a weak sprinkling of Tolkienesque place names, and...PRESTO!...a warm, moist pile of shit! I do hope they add a good 120 million worth of shiny computer effects...
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how the fuck is ONE 15 year old going to stop them? Oh let me guess, he's the fucking chosen one right? also, i'm not going anywhere near anything having to do with michael gay. this movie is doomed right out the door. fuck everyone involved, included the shit writers of the book.
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my thoughts exactly.
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Sorry, just getting a little pumped for THE PRISONER remake on AMC this November.
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Jun 30, 2009 10:56:12 AM CDT
will it have preisidents giving speeches during montages?
by six demon bag
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Yeah, I showed him. I'm sure Shia's going to read my post and it's totally going to ruin his day.
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I'd rather watch Pearl Harbor again! Well, actually...
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Jun 30, 2009 11:00:48 AM CDT
how does that *not* sound like a SciFi original?
by jackknifed_juggernaut
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That sounds more like the Disney Channel!
"All new 'I AM NUMBER FOUR', tomorrow night after 'Hannah Montana'! Only on Disney!!" -
Humanoids land on planet earth and develop powers? That is fucking Superman! Bay, you retard!
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where do they fit into all this..?
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. . . I can't stand Bay, but if he's adapting something I've never heard of, and I have no expectations, fuck it, lets blow some shit up!!!!!!
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Like those two niggerbots?
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YEAH!!!!!!! OKAY!!!!!!! WHAT?!?!?!
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Jun 30, 2009 11:47:02 AM CDT
I'm generally liberal, but I'm getting sick of these illegal...
by flickapoo
...alien space teens hopping the fence into our planet and wasting taxpayer dollars and generally fucking things up. The Mexican and other illegals I have met have been hardworking, ambitious people trying their damndest to catch a better break in the world. These illegal space teens are just fucking useless. If they ever even have a job it's at some cute, quirky caffelatte shop or some such...they're always getting into improbable trouble...and if they get hurt they just show up broken and bleeding at the emergency room, where they waste tens of thousands of taxpayer dollars on fancy diagnostic tests, all of which prove futile since their insides are some unholy mix of titanium and cinnamon raisin oatmeal sludge that no doctor on Earth could fix anyway...of course they just find some rock with a rune on it or something and are healed and fine next fucking week anyway. And of course they're never really alone are they? They're always being hunted down by some angry retarded hillbilly space alien cousin or an intergalactic bounty hunter...who eventually finds them...and in the space bitch fight that follows any number of law abiding and well meaning citizens are harmed, lose their memory, killed, or much worse...not to mention the loss of personal property and real estate to unnecessarily large and cheesy explosions...this is getting out of control...
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Damn you Michael Bay. Couldn't Michael Bay die so Michael Jackson lives? Guess not, God wanted one less kid-buggerer in the world.
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Still, I don't care as long as he's not making any more appalling Transformers films.
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Fuck that lying asshole. "If I say it's all true, I'll sell more copies!" Seriously. Fuck him.
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...Why bother following a handful of survivors to Earth? Did the teens abscond with all of their planet's resources in a duffle bag or something? Are you sure this project isn't being written by the "Star Trek/TF2" duo? They seem to be big on the "things happen because the script says so" premise of plotting, and not any actual logical progression of events.
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Bay what happened? Go make something like the Rock again please!
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Fingerbanging in a theater near you soon.
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Even though he's the most hated man mentioned on Aintitcool
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Somebody had to type it.
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... is a suburb of Akron, Ohio. True, it's about the size of a postage stamp, but no E & O guys flagged this, yet? I doubt Bay and Dreamworks are gonna feel like losing millions of dollars and getting slapped with a cease and desist order before their 180 million dollar summer tentpole even gets a chance to kill billions of moviegoing braincells.
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Just kidding. Anyway, fuck anything Michael Bay touches. I'd love to see the guy sit down and read a script. Feverishly blowing through pages full of this so-called "dialogue" stuff, and then going off on his own tangents about how he loves it SOO FUCKING MUCH but hes going to completely change everything about it so its just one giant car chase + titties. If he's directing, should it really matter to any of us what the movie is actually about. He should have a press release that includes the proposed set pieces, that would technically make more sense.
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Yeah, this does sound kinda like Roswell, which isn't a bad thing since that show was actually pretty good for at least its first season. I hope Michael Bay lets someone besides himself direct though as I've never liked any of his movies.
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Sounds like "The Powers of Matthew Star", which also was about someone who was from another planet escaping from invaders and hiding as a high school student. Meanwhile, the enemy comes looking for him and ... etc etc.
Which goes back much further than Roswell. -
I know its just a pitch, but it sounds stupid to me. If Bay does sci fi I want him to do a retardedly violent epic space opera, with lots of gun fights, hot chicks, and really cool space ships.
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FUCK MICHAEL BAY!
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FUCK MICHAEL BAY!
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FUCK MICHAEL BAY!
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but that is SOP for movies these days. These are dark days for the movie industry.
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Uuuuhhh, I shoulda yelled two.
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then...pretty much
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use their special powers to save their world?
I would assume that there had to be some of their race that were old enough to have supah pow-was
I'm gonna need some convincing to see this -
Roswell with a mega budget, 27 year old strippers posing as teenagers and BAY-SPLOSIONS!!!!!
How can this lose?
I hope all you idiots who paid money to see Transformers 2 are happy now. You have given him the green light for him to do anything...ANYTHING that pops into that fetid swamp he calls a brain. You have granted him ULTIMATE POWER.
Ponder that and tremble, you freaking SHEEP! -
it's because every single person on lorien was a preteen and didn't have their powers yet.......................fuck this movie.
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Never again, I swear to God.
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THIS GUY BAY REALLY IS THE DEVIL, he is without honour, check it: http://dailyblogicle.com/?p=1306
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Aliens in high school. Nevermind.
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The people who like Bay movies need to turn their brains back on when they leave the theater.
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I AM NUMBER FOUR meets I am Seven of Nine.
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"I will not be pushed, stamped, filed, indexed, briefed, debriefed or numbered." I'm also not watching this...
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Huh-huh! Heh-heh! That was cool.
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It appeared last week on rottentomatoes.com.
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Jul 01, 2009 9:34:05 AM CDT
That plot sounds kinda close to the original Transformers backst
by justicesabre
The one that Bay flushed down the toilet because it didn't have enough hot chicks, concept cars and dogs doing dog things.
WTF? -
...hold on though, that show was shit too! Lets do the math here. Shit TV show + rip-off shit film by Bay = an awful lot of shit, flinging its way towards a screen near you. Any post-release reviews are now irrelevant, I've used my powers of prescience to save you all the bother. You're welcome.
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...with explosions.
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Was there like a huge mound of blow or X in the room when this pile of shit was greenlit? Who supplies hollyweird with their dope?
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Oh my god, you guys, can you imagine what we would do with all of our time if we didn't have Michael Bay to hate?! What would happen if we just ignored the new about his future projects, and just like...didn't see them or comment on them?...I think the universe would like implode or something.
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I don't think ironic is the word...because it really makes perfect sense...oh someone help me what karma related word am I looking for???
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