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AICN COMICS REVIEWS BATMAN! BUCK ROGERS! PUNISHER! PHILLY! WALKING DEAD! ROY OF THE ROVERS! ASSHOLES! & MUCH MORE!!!

#5 3/10/09 #8

The Pull List (Click title to go directly to the review) BUCK ROGERS #1 ABSOLUTION #0 AMAZING SPIDER-MAN #597 THE WALKING DEAD Vol.9: HERE WE REMAIN TPB PHILLY #1 BATMAN #687 DR. OBLIVION’S GUIDE TO PROM #1 FANTASTIC FOUR #567 THE LIFE & TIMES OF SAVIOR #28 FRANK CASTLE: THE PUNISHER MAX #71 THE BUMPER BOOK OF ROY OF THE ROVERS HC TPB LOCKJAW & THE PET AVENGERS #2 ICONIC OGN ANGEL: BLOOD & TRENCHES #4 RESURRECTION: THE INSURGENT EDITION TPB & RESURRECTION #0 FCBD Edition ASSHOLES. #2 Big Eyes For the Cape Guy presents DETROIT METAL CITY Vol.1 dot.comics presents… CHEAP SHOTS!

BUCK ROGERS #1

Writer: Scott Beatty Art: Carlos Rafael Publisher: Dynamite Entertainment Reviewer: Optimous Douche

Even though this rebooted BUCK ROGERS avoided the trappings of the 1970s craptacular Disco Buck, please allow me one moment to invoke the spirit of the Gil Gerard’s staccato stuttering cybernetic sidekick Twiki, “I Digga…Digga…Digged this reboot, it was far out!”
As a member of Gen X it’s difficult to disassociate this iteration of a modern day man displaced into the far future from the one that made Gil Gerard a comb-over heart throb thirty years ago. For many, Buck was our initial entrance into Science Fiction, for others Erin Gray and Pamela Hensley served as our Aqua Net inspired sexual awakening, and no matter how annoying or condescending, Twiki and Dr. Theopolis established our template for the computers of tomorrow. To say it left an indelible impression with a bitter nostalgic aftertaste would be an understatement.
Thankfully, Dynamite is leveraging facets of a Buck that spoke more to our grandparents and great grandparents. Everything from the style of Wilma Deerings’s space suit and ray gun to Buck’s bravado (Beatty portrays a Buck that is swagger, not polyester sachet) in this reboot harkens back to the old black and white serials. This makes sense considering those that would remember that time period are either dead or just trying to remember who they are, much less who Buck Rogers is. It’s a bold choice to leverage this forgotten period and it pays off way more than a rehash of campy television.
Instead of turning Buck into a dutiful member of the armed forces, Beatty looks at the reality of space flight over the coming years. Space flight has been moving towards privatization for the better part of a decade thanks to the deep wallets of nerds that have done well, so it makes perfect sense that Buck’s experimental plane was crafted in a garage rather on a NASA testing center. This “space flight for profit” model also allows Beatty to give Buck a great present-day foil in the form of the US Government, which shows a keen interest in Buck’s experimental engine that leverages gravity to propel us through the cosmos.
Beatty presents this kick-off issue by treating time like melted fondue, rather than a linear piece of polly-o string cheese, bopping back and forth between past, present and the future with a natural fluidity as Buck traverses past memories while in the vacuum of space (and lies unconscious from crash landings). Quite honestly, the only reason I know Buck ends up in the future is simply because I know the history of Buck; not because it’s spelled out in black and white on the pages. This is a good thing; it not only keeps you guessing, but also helps the reader empathize with the entire fish out of water concept.
When Buck does finally crash land in the future (at least we think it’s the future), he is greeted by Commander Wilma Deering in a sleek anti-gravity uniform and…a bear. Not just any bear, an armed to the teeth talking bear, with a gun that apparently vaporizes both Buck and Wilma.
The two Carlos do an admirable job making every moment of this adventure feel fresh and exciting. Their facial expression work on Buck helps make all of the time spent in the cockpit of Buck’s experimental ship actually pleasant to see, rather than just a vast void of empty black space.
I honestly have no idea where the hell this book is going, but I can say with certainty this is not your father’s (or your grandfather’s) BUCK ROGERS. I know I’ll be strapped in for the ride on issue 2.
When Optimous Douche isn’t reading comics and misspelling the names of 80’s icons, he “transforms” into a corporate communications guru. "What if the whole world had superpowers? Find out in the pages of Optimous’ original book AVERAGE JOE. Read the first full issue on Optimous’ New Blog and see original sketches by fellow @$$hole Bottleimp. If you are a publisher or can help these guys get AVERAGE JOE up, up, and on the shelves in any way, drop Optimous a line."

ABSOLUTION #0

Writer: Christos Gage Art: Roberto Viacava Publisher: Avatar Press Reviewer: Matt Adler

Christos Gage has earned a lot of goodwill from me with his consistently high quality work on such books as AVENGERS: THE INITIATIVE, THUNDERBOLTS, and X-MEN/SPIDER-MAN. As such, when I heard he had a new creator-owned book coming out from Avatar, I wasn’t hesitant to give it a shot. The fact that this preview issue was a $1.99 for 11 pages of story, plus a text piece by the author and 3 pages of pin-ups by Jacen Burrows and Juan Jose Ryp wasn’t too shabby either. Cutting to the chase, Gage doesn’t disappoint here.
It’s difficult to discuss this series without spoiling the basic premise, which Gage effectively sets up as a surprise reveal at the end of this issue. So if you don’t want it spoiled for you (and hey, I already told you it’s worth buying) read no further. Ok, you’ve been warned.
We’re introduced to the protagonist, a superhero by the nom-de-guerre of John Dusk, in the context of a dream/flashback to his capture of a Texas Chainsaw Massacre-style killer, albeit too late to save the victims. These memories continue to haunt him.
Gage skillfully weaves the structure of his new superhero universe into the story, providing us relevant details such as the way secret identities operate here, and superheroes’ relationship with law enforcement, without wasting the reader’s time on ponderous info-dump.
In short, John Dusk is an ordinary, respectable member of society whose secret identity is known to his police officer girlfriend and law enforcement in general, with whom he regularly cooperates on solving and prosecuting criminal cases. His testimony is permitted in court without revealing his identity, much the way confidential informants or undercover operatives can be used in real life.
The book’s final reveal is foreshadowed subtly; Dusk is informed by his girlfriend that there’s a serial killer going around knocking off sex offenders, wife killers, etc, and relates her suspicion that it may be a cop, explaining in visceral terms the frustration that cops routinely feel when they see the dregs of humanity get off time and again, free to continue perpetrating their horrific crimes on innocent victims.
“You know how it is for us. Every day, dealing with filth we can’t do anything about. Having to call ‘em ‘sir.’ Knowing they’ll hurt someone. Maybe kill someone. Knowing the world would be better off without ‘em. And knowing how easy it would be to make that happen.”
With this rather emotionally intense scene in mind, when Dusk tracks a suspicious character back to his apartment, who confronts him and freely admits to be a killer-in-waiting, mocking Dusk’s impotence to do anything about it, the reader will most likely realize where Gage is going with this. But by that point, the scene has been so well-set, the suspense and emotion so well-developed, that it doesn’t matter that you’ve guessed the reveal; it still hits you in the gut.
John Dusk, the upstanding, law-abiding superhero, makes the man his latest victim.
In his closing essay, Gage explains how this story was developed; of course, as a writer for “Law & Order: Special Victims Unit”, he has experience writing about crimes that go beyond the pale, but perhaps most intriguing are the conversations he relates between himself and a friend who was briefly a police officer, but quit the force after a year. Much of Dusk’s girlfriend’s speech can be traced to this officer’s experiences (though the actual experiences sound even more horrific and trying on the psyche). This officer simply quit rather than give in to the urges that John Dusk has.
Now that Dusk has chosen this path, where will it take him? What will the consequences be? I don’t know, but if Gage can keep up the intensity level of this preview throughout the series, it should be quite a ride.

AMAZING SPIDER-MAN #597

Writer: Joe Kelly Art: Marco Chechetto Publisher: Marvel Comics Reviewer: Liam ‘The Kid’

Note: ‘The Kid’ is 8 years old and has been doing reviews on his own site since August of 2008. And you can now follow the kid’s daily ‘adventures’ on Twitter.
Peter Parker’s friend Harry is Norman Osborn’s son and Norman wants Harry to join his team of Avengers. Spider-Man has had enough of Norman Osborn being in charge of everything and bothering his friends so he wants to go and stop him. In the last issue he took out Venom in a big fight and the Fantastic Four helped him make a suit that makes him look like Venom. Spider-Man put on the suit and pretended to be the Venom Spider-Man on Osborn’s team.
Everyone knows that Osborn was the Green Goblin and pretty much all the good guys know that Osborn’s Avengers are really bad guys in disguise but no one is doing anything to stop them. I liked that in the NEW AVENGERS comic Ronin went on TV and told everyone that Osborn was evil but all the superheroes should be teaming up to take out the evil Avengers. I’m glad that Spider-Man is doing something to try and stop Osborn and save his friend.
Spider-Man looks cool in the black costume and I like that Mr. Fantastic made it so it works like Venom’s where he grows the teeth and tongue. It was neat seeing the real Spider-Man look like that even if it was just pretend. The best part of the book was when Wolverine’s son and Spider-Man fight. Wolverine’s son is supposed to be as strong as Wolverine and I like the battle they had. The art was really good on those pages, too. My favorite drawing was the one where Wolverine’s son is jumping out to try and get Spider-Man. The only thing I was surprised about was that the match was so close. I thought Spider-Man would be able to win pretty easy but I guess not.
The things that I didn’t like in the book was that there was too much about Harry and his girlfriend and the cover. Harry’s girlfriend is cool when she is turned into Menace but when she isn’t she’s pretty boring and I think she’s lying to Harry about wanting help anyway. She was always wanting to be Menace before to help her dad. I think she’s tricking Harry like she tricked everyone else before. Maybe next issue she’ll turn into Menace and do something. The other thing that I didn’t like was that the cover didn’t match the comic. Osborn isn’t in his Iron Man suit in the comic even though he’s wearing it on the cover. Spider-Man is in his regular suit on the cover instead of the black suit. It’s not a big problem but it’s kind of annoying when the cover doesn’t match the story.
My favorite part of the book was when everyone was calling Spider-Man stupid. It was a little funny the first time someone said it but when he was called stupid the second time it was really funny because it meant that he really didn’t fool anyone. I also liked the fights with Wolverine’s son and Hawkeye.
Rating: 8 out of 10

THE WALKING DEAD Vol. 9: HERE WE REMAIN TPB

Writer: Robert Kirkman Art: Charlie Adlard Publisher: Image Comics Reviewer: Baytor

I’m a new convert to this book and while I don’t think it’s the greatest thing ever, I am enjoying the ride; but I must say I’m glad they’re finally out of that damn prison.
There were two big problems I had with the prison arc. The first was the cast got too big for Kirkman to handle properly. It got to the point that anytime I saw a minor character having sex, I started a mental countdown, because their days were truly numbered. I know sex is supposed to equal death in horror stories, but this just smacked of lazy characterization, as Kirkman tried to make the various deaths of the-third-guy-from-the-left have some sort of emotional impact.
The second problem was that it shone a real big spotlight on what rubbish baddies zombies are, making the entire premise seem unbelievable. If a handful of people with no real weapon training and no tanks, body armor, and heavy weapons can run circles around the on-coming zombie hordes, then it’s quite frankly inconceivable that the zombie menace could be so badly handled by the professionals to result in the near extinction of the human race. Oh, sure, there might be a sizable outbreak, but the rules are pretty simple and could be figured out in a matter of days…like the military wouldn’t go for head shots, like they wouldn’t figure out that a bite is fatal and learn to isolate bitten people or amputate infected limbs. And if a zombie can’t get through a chain link fence, what are the chances of one of them crawling out of his grave, meaning that the initial outbreak would be limited to the unburied dead?
But those two problems are (at least temporarily) dispelled as the cast has been reduced to a very manageable number and we’re not seeing how truly inept zombies are at getting through well constructed barricades. Mostly this volume is a collection of character moments. Rick battles a nasty infection and his son must fend for himself. We finally learn who the crazy black lady has been talking to, leading to a bonding moment between her and Rick. And the surviving cast slowly finds each other, which leads into the next big story arc. But mostly this volume returns the book to the ever-present zombie menace of its early days.
I’m still vaguely disappointed in Kirkman’s ability to create memorable and distinct characters. Most of his characters lack a certain spark, so they seldom feel like real people, which is strange in a character-oriented tale. This also leaves a lot of big emotional moments curiously flat. This isn’t much of a problem with his half dozen major characters, but the secondary characters often feel like they’re there just to deliver important information and reveal bits about themselves right before they get killed.
All in all, this isn’t the most eventful story arc in the saga, but it does display the promise of much more interesting things to follow. Let’s just hope that the mullet-wearing conspiracy nut-job scientist is in fact something other than what he appears and our main characters aren’t about to make total fools out of themselves by trusting him.

PHILLY Vol.2 #1

Writer: Ryan McLelland Art: Jim Hanna (pencils), Nichx (inks/colors) Publisher: Evolution Studios Reviewer: Prof. Challenger

“Drinking alcohol beefs up my flame powers. It makes me a better hero.” Firestarter
A funny thing happened on my way to writing this review. I got all caught up in the story and now I wanna read the next 2 issues to see what happens. What’s funny about it is that when Ryan first contacted @$$hole headquarters and awakened Bug and Sleazy from their nightly spooning, the @-signal was quickly sent out for someone to review PHILLY Vol. 2 #1. After a few days of more excuse-making than a group of potential jurors, I stepped up and said “Oh wtf, I’ll do it.”
So, here I am and I was all prepared to eviscerate Ryan’s efforts here in an effort to prove how impartial I am. But dammit, before I realized what was happening I was enjoying the stupid thing. Now, anybody who’s read Ryan’s reviews knows he’s got a sense of humor, and to tell the truth, when I first started digging into it I could hear that same silly, snarky voice of Ryan’s coming out of the mouth of the Firestarter character. So, I was already smiling a little. But I think it was about the point where the hero had just broken the neck of a vampire and was yanking a fang out in an effort to get the vamp to tell who his leader was that I realized I had stopped thinking about Ryan and was just all into the comic itself.
The bottom line on the comic is that it made me laugh, and I mean that in a good way. This thing is pure subversive snark and a fun little distraction from the way too serious Big Two. I mean, the idea of a drunk super-hero telling his secret origin to the bartender to get more free beer is just a funny idea and then to have the bartender disbelieve the story? Priceless.
I’m not going to say this comic is profound or deep; it’s not IRREDEEMABLE. The characters, however, are rather rogueish and a bit egotistical and they bicker a lot. But I kind of liked them, and I think Ryan is hoping readers will like them, and that goes a long way toward enjoying a comic like this. Now, surrounding these three heroes with vampires who would fit in well on any episode of BUFFY is a treat. In fact, these vampire characters sound and act more like BUFFY-style vampires than they do in many a BUFFY comic book. Super-heroes versus Vampires almost always equals fun. The only way to make it more fun? Add werewolves to the mix. Am I right?
You can tell Ryan is a fan of comics first and foremost, because he’s throwing everything that’s cool about an indie comic here with some gore and blood, some liberal cursing, gay jokes, mocking of authority, flouting super-hero clichés, and even some silly drunk super-hero stuff. And for some reason, at least to me, it makes it all even funnier by being set in Philadelphia instead of New York, Chicago, or LA. Why is Philly such a funny city? There’s also a sexy tease for the straight crowd in that the cover features a female hero with a “Mockingbird” mask, but she doesn’t actually appear in this issue…well, other than a sexy pin-up. So, I’m guessing that this trio of heroes is soon to be a quartet.
Artistically, the guy providing the art is Jim Hanna. Now, I’m unfamiliar with his work but what I like about it on this project is the sense of whimsy. It’s a style similar to a lot of mainstream independent work (think DEAD @17). But Jim brings a little something that I really appreciate and that is a bit of a look like he’s inspired by the great Joe Staton of E-MAN fame. That face shot on the cover of the Philly Police Chief is pure Staton.
I should probably get off my lazy ass (but won’t) and do some research into the background on this series since it is identified as a “Volume 2.” So, that probably means there’s a “Volume 1” out there that I’ve never heard of. But the joy of the new information age is that teh InterWebs is a great way to get your hands (or eyes) on cool stuff like PHILLY that may not be carried in your local comics store.
I’m sorry, Ryan and Bug. I really did intend to tear this comic apart but instead I kind of dug it. Sorry.
PHILLY is also apparently a comic that can teach me important things. It taught me that gay humans and vampires both have one thing in common: a love of “Gossip Girl”. See? I did not know that, and never would’ve known that were it not for PHILLY. So there’s that.
Prof. Challenger is really Texas artist/writer/editor/researcher/teacher Keith Howell, who recently successfully battled the evil airline industry as he struggled to trek across the great mid-west to Peoria, Illinois where he received the 2009 Farmerphile Award for Best Artwork at FarmerCon IV: The Philip Jose’ Farmer Memorial Gathering. Check out his website which is badly in need of updating at profchallenger.com. and check out all things Farmer at pjfarmer.com. Yes, it’s true, there really are some people who actually like the Prof.

BATMAN #687

Writer: Judd Winick Art: Ed Benes Publisher: DC Comics Reviewer: Ambush Bug

WARNING: If you are offended by the word “dick”, you may want to scroll past this review. Be forewarned, henceforth there will be a lot of dick talk.
Although I wouldn’t call myself a fan of writer Judd Winick’s work, I don’t have the usual aversion many experience when the writer’s name is mentioned. Winick’s been around for a while and though he definitely deserves some of the interweb backlash he receives, I’ve read a couple of his efforts that haven’t been as bad as some seem to want to say. I have noticed that when Mr. Winick steps from the soapbox and doesn’t try to tell a story with a special message, his work tends to be stronger. I think it’s those “very special issues” by Judd Winick that leave such a bad taste in the mouths of some of his detractors. For instance, the John Walsh cameo from his OUTSIDERS series was forced, preachy crud. But on the other hand, I found quite a few of his issues of GREEN ARROW to be fine adventure yarns (when he wasn’t using Connor Hawke as a crash test dummy, that is). One thing I’ve noticed is that some of Judd’s strongest mainstream super hero work has been when he’s writing Batman. Not sure why, but when he’s writing about The Cape & the Cowl, he ups the ante a bit and the bet pays off here.
Now, I’m not going to say that this issue is anywhere near the quality of Morrison’s pretty damn sweet BATMAN & ROBIN #1 issue. But after reading Tony Daniel’s fun yet breezy BATTLE FOR THE COWL, its good to have Winick on board because he does know how to craft a decent Bat-yarn. Before you race to the Talkbacks to tear me a new one, hang tight and read on. This isn’t a perfect issue and I’ll get to the problems in a bit, but I want to start this on a positive note.
What I liked best about this issue were some of the quiet moments. There’s a scene where Wonder Woman and Superman are in the Batcave and ask Alfred if he is alright. Alfred responds bluntly and somberly, “No, sir. I am not. My son has died.” This was a quiet scene that could have and should have been in the ga-billion and one books after Bats “died”, but it wasn’t, so it was good to have that acknowledged here in a scene that really is pretty well executed. There’s another scene at Bruce’s “funeral” where Dick discourses about how there shouldn’t be a big funeral for Batman or parades in his honor. It would ruin the myth and the effectiveness of all Bruce has built. These are necessary scenes. Sure some of them are redundant (especially since Dick merely parrots what Alfred tells him pages before in this scene), but one thing Winick does well is write emotions. He’s not afraid to show the wear and tear this super hero business has on a character. Falling back on Winick’s strong suits, these key scenes of the book were the best of the bunch.
Unfortunately, there were quite a few more pages in this book, and a whole lotta them were redundant.
The main problem with Winick is that he occasionally doesn’t know when to quit with the touchy-feely stuff. It’s good to be in touch with one’s emotions. It’s good being able to express them from time to time. But when it happens all the time, well…that’s not entertaining; that’s a therapy session. Twice in this issue, we get mopey Dick slumped over or gazing heroically off into the distance, gripping the cowl and furrowing his brow, hemming and hawing about whether or not he wants to put on Bat’s spare pare of underoos. Now, this wouldn’t be annoying if not for the fact that Dick has been doing this since Morrison’s first “false” death of Batman at the end of R.I.P. (circa December of last year) OR spent the last two months doing it in every issue of BATTLE FOR THE COWL and its myriad spin offs and tie ins. Let’s not even mention the scheduling mess of releasing BATMAN & ROBIN a week prior, which makes the big reveal in this issue completely meh inducing. But in this issue, we get more pontificating from Dick about how much of a tough decision this is for him. We get it, Dick. Shit or get off the pot, already. Seeing a character mope and whine about something, then getting a fine issue of BatDick and Robin from Morrison only to have more mopey Dick a week later is just short of maddening.
So I’m conflicted with this issue. It’s got a few nice scenes. Necessary scenes. Scenes that help bridge the gaps that often Morrison doesn’t want to be bothered with in his broad-strokes storytelling style. I appreciate Winick’s deft and careful handling of said key scenes. But I hope that now that we’ve finally got Dick in the costume we can have him do something more than just poke at being Batman like a skeeter on a streetlamp. These scenes weren’t all bad, some of them were necessary and well done. But I’m glad they’re behind us so we can all move on with some stories featuring the new Caped Crusader. And while I don’t love all of Winick’s efforts, I have been entertained by his Bat-stories the most out of all of them, so I’m willing to give his run a shot here. With Ed Benes’ solid art sweetening the deal, this book may not be the blockbuster BATMAN & ROBIN is, but it has potential to be a good read if Winick uses the emo in moderation and the book is allowed to fly on its own rather than simply fill in the holes Morrison lacks the attention for.
Ambush Bug is Mark L. Miller, reviewer and co-editor of AICN Comics for over eight years. Check out his short comic book fiction here and here published in MUSCLES & FIGHTS 3 and MUSCLES & FRIGHTS on his ComicSpace page. Bug was interviewed here and here at Cream City Comics. Look for more comics from Bug in 2009 from Bluewater Productions, including the just-announced sequel to THE TINGLER for their VINCENT PRICE PRESENTS series available in July’s previews and on the shelves September 30th.

DR. OBLIVION’S GUIDE TO PROM #1 (one-shot)

Written and Art by: Jeff Pina Published by: Sideways 8 Studios Reviewed by: Ryan McLelland

It’s a pretty rough life being a supervillain. It’s also pretty hard being a father to a teenage daughter. It really sucks being a supervillain who is also a father to a teenage daughter who also happens to be dating your heroic nemesis. Thus is the life of Dr. Oblivion and the good Doctor is back for more (after the incredible mini-series DR. OBLIVION’S GUIDE TO TEENAGE DATING) with the brand new one-shot DR. OBLIVION’S GUIDE TO PROM.
Dr. Oblivion is now leading a nice retired life following the events of TEENAGE DATING, though he is not happy about his daughter Callie going to the prom. She’s not going with The Mongoose – her beau and Oblivion’s rival but Oblivion knows that something must be amiss between the two lovebirds. So he does the normal thing a father would do – he chaperones. His chaperoning only lasts moments as he is booted from the prom for being a bit overbearing about EVERYTHING. This leads him to don his costume once again and decide to bring on the killing, starting with that pesky Mongoose. Death, robots, costumes, and destruction? Sounds like an awesome prom to me.
Jeff Pina writes and draws another great Dr. Oblivion book, a twisted Mangaesque witty tale of being a jealous father who not only will say, “Treat me daughter bad and I’ll kill you” but will actually back up that threat. My big gripe? The issue is way too short but the price is appropriate for that making this issue a great affordable buy (especially for those who might be interested in the Dr. Oblivion but don’t want to spend a lot). DR. OBLIVION’S GUIDE TO PROM is a great new entry into this delightful series and will instantly make a fan out of anyone who picks it up.
Ryan McLelland has worked in movies and comics journalism for the past several years before joining the @$$holes here at AICN. Ryan’s comic work has already graced comic shelves with Arcana’s PHILLY, WISE INTELLIGENCE, UPTOWN GIRL, and THE SENTINELS ANTHOLOGY. He rarely updates his blog but when he does it can be read at www.eyewannabe.com. The first issue of his new WISE INTELLIGENCE miniseries can be found here.

FANTASTIC FOUR #567

Writer: Mark Millar Art: Brian Hitch Publisher: Marvel Comics Reviewer: steverodgers

Mark Millar really knows how to write a comic book, Bryan Hitch really knows how to draw one and together they really get the job done. Issue #566 of FANTASTIC FOUR starts things off with a beautifully-rendered, beached, dead Watcher, and Reed doing CSI stuff on him surrounded by unspecified agents. It actually felt a little DC, starting it all off with some galactic mystery. Reed is asked by Agent Nong what could kill a Watcher, causing Reed to stare off into the stretchy distance, in pensive but manly silence and finally say, “You don’t want to know.” This is movie star stuff and Millar and Hitch are cinematic in the way they do comics; it’s moments like that—pure-Hollywood-popcorn movie scenes—that make you want to get yourself a movie Coke to go with it. It worked well in the ULTIMATES, and it’s really starting to work in these past two issues of the FANTASTIC FOUR.
In this issue we also meet Doom’s master (who looks like Judge Death) and his apprentice (who has a cool scepter and looks to be wearing Doom-ish armor). The Master is upset with Doom: Doom isn’t evil enough; he is in charge of a tiny country he has never heard of; he is squandering his talent and isn’t living up to his potential. The Master is like an angry, naggy parent holding up a sub-par report card from villain school. So angered by Doom’s performance, the Master fries him up with some magic bolts.
Now, there are a couple ways that I’m looking at the premise of “Doom’s Master.” One is that Doom really has no master, that the whole concept is total nonsense and it’s just Millar shoe-horning and changing characters into a plot to make it work. But the other way, and this is what’s working for me so far, is that if this guy is really Doom’s master, then he must be something really powerful—so powerful that even Doom is awed; and if that’s the case, the Fantastic Four are really in for it.
In #567, Doom’s master joyfully toys with Doom by expertly mindfucking him up and down, dumping his burnt carcass into the Pliocene age to be eaten by a big dinosaur whale and turning Latveria into Genosha. It’s really over-the-top, massive, comic book destruction beautifully drawn by Hitch. It’s pretty scary actually; the Master means business and now that Doom is out of the way, he decides to take up Doom’s mask and give his foes a real challenge, starting with the Fantastic Four. It’s classic comic booking: just when you think your worst enemies can’t get any worse, someone a whole lot worse shows up.
I’m excited to see what happens next, even if I probably know what will happen: Doom will get himself together, the Fantastic Four will be pushed to the brink, and when all hope is lost, they’ll somehow manage to be heroic, make hard choices, maybe team up with a reluctant Doom and save the day. And really, isn’t that about all you could want in a well done, summer-Hollywood-action, super hero comic?

THE LIFE AND TIMES OF SAVIOR 28

Writer: J.M. DeMatteis Art: Mike Cavallaro Publisher: IDW Publishing Reviewer: BottleImp

When I read the first issue of this series, I remember thinking, “It’s okay, but SAVIOR 28 is just another superhero deconstruction title to toss on the pile.” After two subsequent issues, this comic book has jumped up from that gray area and become one of my favorites. Here’s why: there are usually two directions that this medium tends to go to when dealing with the real-world ramifications of muscle-bound, atomic-powered vigilantes who wear their underwear over their pants. At one end we have the REALLY real world (as with WATCHMEN) where the mere existence of superheroes, let alone their actions, has a profound effect on the political, social and economic conditions of the entire world. At the other end lies the more “comic book-y” world (such as the universe of Mark Gruenwald’s SQUADRON SUPREME) where the superheroes can save the world from alien invaders, blow up mountains with energy blasts from their eyes, but not have any effect on the day-to-day workings of their world, until the superheroes make a conscious decision to (everyone together, now) use their powers for the betterment of mankind.
The thing that makes SAVIOR 28 so interesting is that it manages to fuse both these familiar themes into a single story, so that Savior 28 is negotiating peace talks with foreign dignitaries at the same time that crazed super-villains are plotting to conquer the world. It sounds goofy, and it shouldn’t work, but somehow J.M. DeMatteis has managed to blend the intrigue of real-life politics with the absurdity of the four-color hero and make it seriously compelling.
That’s pretty damn cool.
This issue (narrated by Savior 28’s assassin and former sidekick) focuses on the start of the peace movement begun by the hero after his failure to prevent the 9/11 attacks. We get some of that Alan Moore-style real-world impact as Savior 28 tours the world meeting presidents, prime ministers, dictators and despots. We get the reaction from the George W. Bush White House to 28’s visits with America’s enemies in the “War on Terror.” And unlike all those Obama comics that were obviously produced as a quick marketing gimmick, wherein Obama’s politics or policies have no bearing on plot or tone, the inclusion of the political figures in SAVIOR 28 is essential to that real-world feel that DeMatteis achieves. And of course, because no superhero comic would be complete without it, a crazed super-villain crashes one of 28’s peace rallies.
But it’s not your usual slugfest—instead of a simple victory through strength scenario, we’re presented with disturbing questions about the effectiveness of peace rather than combat, the ability to turn aside when confronted by enemies, and our instinct as Americans (or even as humans) to cheer for violence. All this wrapped up in a seemingly innocuous fight scene.
Don’t get scared off by all this philosophical talk—there’s still people in costumes, hints of a big government/superhero conspiracy, and the added menace of one of 28’s arch-enemies trying to seduce him to her cause. In other words, there’s plenty of that good old comic book action that makes the medium a hoot to read. SAVIOR 28 is shaping up to be the best of both worlds—the superheroes and the serious—and fans of either genre would do well to give this title a try.
When released from his Bottle, the Imp takes the form of Stephen Andrade, an artist/illustrator/pirate monkey painter from the Northeast. You can see some of his artwork here. He’s given up comics more times than he can remember. But every time he thinks he's out, they pull him back in.

FRANK CASTLE: THE PUNISHER MAX #71

Writer: Victor Gischler Art: Goran Parlov Publisher: Marvel MAX Reviewer: Mr. Pasty

“This place looks like a fucked-up version of Cracker Barrel.”
How do you reinvent a homicidal vigilante who’s butchered the crime-ridden streets of New York for over 30 years? Why, you load up his trunk and send him on a road trip, of course. WELCOME TO THE BAYOU is probably the most offbeat and entertaining “Hero vs. Hick” storyline since Spider-Man went toe-to-gangrenous-toe with Banjo and Bugeye back in SPECTACULAR #156.
Frank Castle is headed to New Orleans to deliver a package in his trunk. And when I say package, I mean the sort of cargo that thumps and bumps down the highway ala Billy Batts. Fortunately, Victor Gischler’s script is in no hurry to get him there. That means plenty of soliloquizing and Hillbilly hijinks along the way. In fact, all the southern stereotypes are here in earnest: drunk driving, southern belles, man-eating alligators and of course, denim overalls stretched over hairy backs. This book is loaded with characters that are so vile and so country, even Swamp Thing is talking to a realtor.
THE PUNISHER MAX series has struggled to live up to the legacy of Garth Ennis since his departure in 2008. “Welcome to the Bayou” is no exception. Gischler has managed to capture the spirit of Frank Castle, but not his heart and soul. Still, I don’t consider it a total loss, especially in the case of his trip to “The Big Easy.” This Castle is a little looser and at times, more accessible. Yes, he broods and yes, he talks to himself like Micro can still hear him, but every now and then I like to get through a Punisher book without feeling the need to blame his sins on the memory of his dead kids. This is one of those times. I hate to sound unsympathetic, but the Castle family has been gone for many years. I’m kind of over it.
Parlov’s Punisher is appropriately menacing. Think Duke Nukem minus the silly dye job. He also has a gift for drawing scantily clad women. (C’mon baby...kick them Daisies…) I would only ask that unless Frank Castle is going to change back into Clark Kent at the next phone booth, let’s do without the spit curl. “Welcome to the Bayou” is a promising start in a new direction without abandoning the blood and guts storytelling we’ve come to expect from the Punisher MAX series. Bottom line? This story delivers. It’s all the fun of “Redneck Rampage” without any of the headaches of DOS.
My Rating: 4 Southern Comforts out of 5

THE BUMPER BOOK OF ROY OF THE ROVERS HC TPB

Writer: Various Artist: Various Publisher: Titan Books Reviewer: steverodgers

About 10 pages into the BUMPER BOOK OF ROY OF THE ROVERS, it became clear to me that reading a comic about soccer is about a gazillion times more interesting than actually watching it played on TV. This book is a compilation of strips, old advertisements and pages of soccer fiction from the 50s, 60s and 70s British Annuals about Roy Race and the Melchester Rovers, which young English lads apparently used to gobble up once a year. The book is absolutely charming and, I have to say, there is something about a ballclub being kidnapped on its way to a match, taken to a castle and forced to play and outwit some robot soccer players, which just transcends sports. In this book, Roy and his mates play football (of course), have adventures, show some local boys around the team facilities and meet the trainer (there are pages and pages about the team trainer) and enjoy a working holiday before the season starts. It is full of soccer minutia and illustrations of the team hot pool and jerseys from around the world; if you are into soccer, it’s in here.
The art is illustrative, like an old magazine advertisement in LIFE magazine, and Roy and his pals look gallant as they strut around the pitch, making sure to play to win, but to play fair. The advertisements are just as fun as the stories, with boy commandos in their Clarks Commando shoes who help solve a mystery. Also, check out the Action Man Footballer in your favorite team’s colours, and if you send in 15 stars from your Action Man figure set you get a free Action Man tie!
This is the comic for you if you know who Roy is and read his adventures over a plate of fish and chips or have some massive love for soccer (you know, if you’re British). But it’s also for the Yank like me who loves to pore over the letter pages, advertisements and quirk in old comics—and it’s even more interesting with another culture. It’s a shame they didn’t have this in the States; as a kid, I would have loved to have followed a fake NFL team in comics. Sure, there was KICKERs INC. (which I bought) and NFL SUPERPRO (did not buy), but this is something more; it’s part instruction manual (the lads instruct us on how to kick and we learn about off-sides) and part idealist, happy-to-have-a-straight-laced-sports-hero comic. It’s just very…charming.
As someone new to Roy, I would have loved to have an introduction (where is Neil Gaiman? He’d knock that out of the park) and more information on the artists, writers and historical information behind the stories; for, as it is, all the artists and writers are anonymous. Other than that though, this is a nice time capsule worth opening. You’ll feel the thrill of watching the lads head out into the pitch and the shouts of the home crowd, with old Roy, handsome, smart and ready to lead the Melchester side to another victory!

LOCKJAW & THE PET AVENGERS #2

Writer: Chris Eliopoulos Art: Ig Guara Publisher: Marvel Comics Reviewer: Matt Adler

This is a very silly comic. But that’s okay. With tons of doom, gloom, and mayhem on the shelves, it’s a nice change of pace to have a comic about a bunch of superheroic animals on a quest to recover the most powerful objects in the universe.
Chris Eliopoulos has distinguished himself with his all-ages work at Marvel on such books as FRANKLIN RICHARDS: SON OF A GENIUS (though that’s not all he’s capable of, as anyone who’s read his DESPERATE TIMES series knows). Here he gets to draw on a surprisingly diverse cast from across the Marvel Universe; I never really thought about how many super-powered animals Marvel has before this series, but I suppose that’s not a topic many dwell on.
As in the first issue, the team is led by Lockjaw, the Inhumans’ gigantic teleporting dog, who has gathered his group of powered pets to retrieve the Infinity Gems (of Thanos and his Infinity Gauntlet fame) before anyone less responsible than said group of animals gets their paws on them. Interestingly, Eliopoulos chooses to have Lockjaw be the one member of the group who never speaks directly, perhaps in reference to his silent master Black Bolt (and perhaps also in reference to the long-standing controversy over John Byrne’s retconned retcon of Lockjaw being a mutated Inhuman rather than just a smart dog).
Fulfilling the role of Medusa in speaking for Lockjaw is the Frog Thor, Eliopoulos’ (re)creation from the pages of Spider-Man Family (and an homage to Walt Simonson’s classic Thor tale). The cast is rounded out by Lockheed, Kitty Pryde’s alien miniature dragon who is still mourning the loss of his mistress; Redwing, the Falcon’s telepathic falcon; and Hairball (AKA Niels), Speedball’s kinetically-charged bouncing cat, and the non-powered Ms. Lion, Aunt May’s pooch. It’s thus far unclear if Hairball is aware that his master has turned into a spiky emo masochist (though it’s been reported in interviews that Speedball is on his way back to his more traditional form, so that may be moot, and is probably not appropriate to the tone of this series anyway).
This installment sees the Pets transported to the Savage Land, where quite naturally they add Zabu, Ka-Zar’s sabertooth tiger to the team, and the surprise antagonist turns out to be Devil Dinosaur. Probably the most amusing part of the issue is the constant back and forth between the few-cards-short-of-a-deck Ms. Lion and Hairball who is completely disdainful of this dog who compensates for his (yes, Ms. Lion is a he) lack of powers with tons of enthusiasm.
This is very much an all-ages book in terms of the content being acceptable and accessible even for younger kids. Adults, if they can accept the sense of whimsy and innocence with which the book is written, will find something to enjoy too. It’s by no means a biting or sharp satire, but it’s sweet, and it’s fun.

ICONIC OGN

Writer: Various Artist: Various Publisher: Comicbook Artists Guild Reviewer: Prof. Challenger

"CAG is pretty terrific. One of the hardest parts of the freelance creative life is the isolation. Freelancers generally work alone. It's rare to have a chance to interact with a bunch of other "creatives" and see what happens. CAG provides that chance for newbies, experienced creators, artists, writers, dreamers…generally there's a lot of talent in the room. Stuff happens…" Gary Cohn
First of all, who or what is the Comic Book Artist's Guild?
Thank you for asking.
The Comicbook Artist's Guild is a loose group of folks who work together to promote independent comic book artists/writers and their creations. This means creative people and those who are simply fans working together to explore new artistic possibilities within the medium and work toward giving comics a good reputation within the communities we all live in. So, join up with them. Friend them on Facebook. Purchase a copy of this anthology. This is an easy and real way to become involved in comics beyond just being a consumer.
Now, some of you may remember comics like BLUE DEVIL and AMETHYST: PRINCESS OF GEMWORLD. I know I do. Those two series came out right in the middle of my glory days of comic book collecting (read: high school) and so I'm very familiar with writer Gary Cohn, who wrote or co-wrote (with Dan Mishkin) both those series and many other comics of the day. Gary now teaches full-time and helps with CAG as a labor of love and contributes to this anthology with a nice introduction about the roots of ICONIC. Reflecting back on his childhood, he shares common memories with myself and probably many of our generation. For example, we share the expansion of our vocabularies because of the purple prose of Stan Lee. Many a time I also found myself thumbing through a dictionary so I could understand what The Beast was saying. Another shared experience is that exposure to Marvel's THOR comic directly led to an interest in mythology. For myself, it was 3rd Grade that the characters of Thor and Hercules from THE AVENGERS led me to the school library in Puerto Rico to check out a book on Norse Mythology and Greek Mythology. And I've been hooked on classical and modern mythology ever since, and all thanks to comics.
ICONIC is an anthology of short stories that all share a common theme. They are all in some way presenting a story about a legendary or iconic hero (real or fictional) but the telling of the story is somehow skewed or twisted. The stories are held together by a framing sequence involving a grandfather reading these stories to his grandchildren (evocative of the framing sequences in the film THE PRINCESS BRIDE). There are ten stories in all and each one is unique and enjoyable. I will highlight three of them to give you a taste of what is available within the pages of ICONIC.
FIRST IN FLIGHT: THE STORY OF GUSTAVE WHITEHEAD tells the story of the actual first sustained flight and the man who lost out to the Wright Brothers because of history's rewrite and a bit of anti-German sentiment. Written by Robert Sodaro and brilliantly illustrated by my friend Rick Lundeen, who most recently published 100 COVERS (an excellent book itself). Rick is one of those professional working artists with a profound love and appreciation for comic books but who inexplicably has never been snapped up by one of the two major publishers. His artwork made for a strong first story in this anthology.
Next I would like to focus on GEORGE & THE MONSTER, written by Scott Ludwig and illustrated by Keith Murphey. What a joy of a story. Scott takes the classic tale of St. George & the Dragon and transplants it to a modern day boy (George) battling the monster (Dragon) in his closet. What impressed me artistically was that Keith is also the illustrator of a brief biographical short about Mark Twain in this same book but used two completely different styles. Keith used standard realistic graphical illustrations for the Twain piece but then he shifted to a style reminiscent of the cartooning work of Phil Foglio for the GEORGE story and I really loved it. It is probably my favorite of the stories.
REPERCUSSIONS is a Sherlock Holmes versus Jack the Ripper story with a rather unsettling twist at the end. This story is well-written by Dwight Baldwin and is illustrated in sharp blacks and whites by J.M. DeSantis. I really thought J.M.'s slickness of line and strong harsh shadows added a nice mood to the story.
But these three highlights from me do not fully cover the range of stories that include (but are not limited to) a story about John Henry, a cool interpretation of A CHRISTMAS CAROL, and a nifty take on Jason & the Argonaut's encounter with Talos the Bronze.
I hesitate greatly to criticize a book like this that is a true labor of love, so I'm not going to do that. But in truth, there's not anything I need to really criticize, though the more experienced connoisseur of comics will probably note the wide range of artistic experience within this book. The editor rightly uses the most experienced and polished artists to produce the framing sequence and the first few stories. This helps the reader to get into the book quickly and buy into the concept and keeps the shifts in style and ability from being too jarring. But the truth is that each and every story is outstanding in its own way and makes this an anthology well worth owning and reading more than once.
To be sure, this is a book that can and should be enjoyed by readers of all ages. If you choose to get a copy, consider enjoying it for awhile and then donating it to your local public or school library. Or better yet, buy one to keep and one to share. The more we fans support efforts like these, the stronger the comic medium will become.

ANGEL: BLOOD & TRENCHES #4

Written by: John Byrne Art by: John Byrne Published by: IDW Publishing Review by: Baytor

This mini-series started with a really interested image: a vampire flying a German triplane. It’s the sort of image that makes you wonder what those nasty vamps are up to and as I headed into the fourth and final issue of this mini-series, I was hopeful that Byrne would reveal a twist worthy of that set-up.
He doesn’t. Kakistos isn’t trying to raise an army to invade hell. He’s not trying to bring down a rival demon. He’s not looking to even an old grudge with the Watcher’s Council. All he’s doing is planning an air invasion of London while in the employ of the Kaiser for unspecified reasons (an odd plan for an old-fashioned vampire who shunned all modern conveniences, including electricity, in his one and only BUFFY appearance), which might be enough if the story focused on what a devastatingly bad thing that would be, but we’re not even treated to the usual ranting monster talking about how he’s going to feast on the blood of King George and use his skull as a goblet.
In lieu of interesting revelations, we get a lot of overly-dramatic first person captions as Angel exercises his purple prose muscles and sleep-walks through some fairly pedestrian escape sequences leading to the big, climatic battle atop the wing of a German plane…a battle that doesn’t come anywhere close to the level of excitement and danger promised by the cover. Byrne’s continued ineptitude at non-linear storytelling added some unnecessary confusion to the entire affair, which had me re-reading the previous issues to make sense of the timeline and plot. John Byrne seems to know that more talented writers make excellent use of non-linear techniques, and jumps around in the narrative in the hopes of replicating their success, succeeding only in confusing and annoying audiences.
Apart from the final two pages, this is just a desperately mediocre book. Those final two pages, on the other hand, are so aggressively lame, insipid, trite, and hopelessly cliché that it will likely leave an incredibly bad taste in your mouth.
If you do not wish to have this “surprise” spoiled, then skip the next paragraph.]
Perhaps the only more over-used twist endings in sci-fi/fantasy history are “it was Earth all along” and “their names were Adam & Eve”, but “it’s Hitler” ranks a close third. Byrne dusts off this moldy oldie which should have all but his most faithful fans groaning at the sheer audacity of trying to pass this uber-clichéd ending for the bazillionth time in literary history.
Overall, this mini-series has been a decent read, although I’d be remiss not to mention that Angel has been acting more than a bit out of character throughout; starting with him living on the streets eating rats (something he didn’t start doing until the 1970s) to his adoptions of a heroic posture 70 years before Buffy inspired him to make amends for his past deeds, to the absolutely miles out-of-character slaughter of a German U-boat crew (thirty years later, he’d be fighting other vampires to save a Nazi U-boat crew). None of these issues are enough to destroy my mild enjoyment of the mini-series, as I’m not of the mind that a good story can be ruined by sloppy continuity, nor a bad story saved by proper research; but I know others might not be so forgiving of John Byrne’s inability to do his homework. For Angel fans of a non-anal retentive bent, you could do worse than check this series out, although remember to dial the expectations down.

RESURRECTION: THE INSURGENT EDITION TPB & RESURRECTION #0 FCBD Edition

Writer: Mark Guggenheim Art: David Dumeer & Douglas Dabbs (TPB) & Juntin Greenwood (FCBD Edition) Publisher: Oni Press Reviewer: Ambush Bug

Most movies about the end of the world end on a bleak note. A plague hits, humanity slides off the table, and all of man's carefully built dreams are destroyed. Most zombie movies happen in that fashion, as do plague movies and even the recent disaster movies. Once the threat is revealed and battled, it goes one of two ways - towards hope or towards hell. Either way it follows a formula, one tried and true in both comics and films. The fun part has always been man's initial reaction to the sudden splash in the kiddie pool. RESURRECTION is what happens next. Although it specifically deals with an alien attack, it could easily be a zombie comic, or a nuclear war comic, or even a superhero origin story. What RESURRECTION does so well is that it tells you what happens AFTER all of the usual stuff goes on. Devastating alien attack. Mankind loses and retreats into bunkers. The world is conquered. End of movie, right?
Nope, that's just the beginning of RESURRECTION. The trade paperback of RESURRECTION opens with the humans crawling out of bomb shelters to investigate something they haven't experienced in a long time--silence. What they find is an evacuated Earth. Almost all remnants of an alien attack are gone. There is much devastation. Cities are leveled, but not an alien to be seen, and so starts a story of picking up the pieces, and a trip down untried territory is launched.
RESURRECTION is rock solid storytelling. Writer Mark Guggenhiem writes as if he's experienced this stuff first hand. The PTSD of the survivors, the lack of control, the chaos, the lack of leadership: all of the things the government tries to keep society from doing have happened and a return to the good old days seems further and further away from the realm of possibility as each issue drops.
Guggenheim starts this miniseries off with a tight focus on one aspect of the story, a lone survivor wandering from a shelter and looking for her "missing" son, but as the issues go by, the camera pulls back to reveal more and more of a destroyed world and humanity’s often futile attempts to piece civilization back together. Like most strong fiction, this story is rich in metaphor reminiscent of national tragedies such as 9-11 and Hiroshima and Peal Harbor. The confusion and retreat that happened September 11th has been magnified here to sci fi levels, but the barbarism, the panic, and the cutthroat struggle for power, though intensified for fictional purposes in RESURRECTION, are not that different from the way the real world reacts to such tragedies.
What I really like about this trade is the focus on the struggle for power. Though the president and vice president have passed away, the secretary of state still lives and hopes to step into the leadership role. Much of this story focuses on the reaction of a small population to a man who was not elected into an office and the concept that if the nation that elected the leader no longer exists, does that leader have a right to lead? The attention to politics is another layer of cool in this multi-dimensional book.
If you've noticed, I haven't mentioned the aliens at all so far. Reason is, there really aren’t a lot of aliens in this book. But their presence is felt throughout in the shattered civilizations that decorate every panel and hopeless looks on the faces rendered crisply and cleanly by artists Dumeer & Dabbs. The one alien that is featured in this series only has a few panels dedicated to him in the collected trade, but these panels are doozies.
Readers Talkback
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  • June 17, 2009, 8:21 a.m. CST

    Being FIRST is the ultimate destiny of - DOOM!

    by V. von Doom

  • June 17, 2009, 8:31 a.m. CST

    And DOOM HAS NO MASTER!

    by V. von Doom

    steverodgers, Millar is not shoehorning the "Master" into the FF universe: He's trying to latch his pitiful knockoff onto the legend of DOOM like a lamprey leaches off a fish's guts. "Oh, this guy just appeared from nowhere and can kick Victor Von's butt; he MUST be tough!" No, it means Millar is a lazy writer. The only consolation will be seeing him knocked back on his ass when DOOM returns!

  • June 17, 2009, 8:32 a.m. CST

    Twice is nice but three's divine...

    by Psynapse

    what's hers, is yours, is ours, is mine.

  • June 17, 2009, 8:33 a.m. CST

    Right on Bug Booster

    by optimous_douche

    This Booster issue was GREAT!!!

  • June 17, 2009, 8:42 a.m. CST

    Man, how awful were the non-Morrison bat books

    by Laserhead

    last week? Red Robin was senseless and apparently drawn by a chimpanzee who works with his feet, while Batman was a dull, completely redundant and pointless issue about Dick Grayson's reservations in assuming the role. You know, exactly the thing we spent three issues of Battle for the Cowl showcasing.<p>And why, for fuck's sake, can't DC get decent artists? Does Marvel really pay THAT much more, to anyone who can almost draw? I was reading some Marvel tpbs over the weekend, and you can't help but notice how even their c-list miniseries about an obscure cosmic character still get really, really good art. Whereas DC struggles to retain the likes of Dale Eaglesham or something.<p>It's just so goddamned bizarre how badly and ineptly they've bungled the whole 'Death of Batman' thing, particularly when compared with what Marvel did with Captain America.

  • June 17, 2009, 8:47 a.m. CST

    Red Robin

    by Laserhead

    How can you say that was anything other than a festering pile of elephant shit? The horrible art, the nonsensical story... so it's not Tim's idea to go look for Bruce; he's basically fired by Dick and, well, just has to find something to do with himself. And Tim WAYNE? Isn't that really disrespectful to the man who raised Tim and died because of his hobby as a super-hero? But moreover-- what the fuck, exactly, is Tim doing? He's traveling all over the country why? What clues are making him think Bruce is out there somewhere? What clues is he following? Why does he go any of the places he goes and why does he do any of the things he does? How is any of it supposed to help him find Bruce? It's goddamned ridiculous, boring bullshit, with awful art that wouldn't have passed the Comico standards in the early 80s.<p>Christ. It sucked so bad.

  • June 17, 2009, 8:47 a.m. CST

    Laserhead's Right RE The Bat Books

    by V. von Doom

    I usually gave DC the awards for "decent, on-the-ball" editors over the decades. Yet something's gone wrong over the past couple of years. Too many late books, too many flubbed events. I'm not a DiDido basher, but I don't think it's a coincidence this all started happening on his watch. Is he actually Bill Jemas in disguise?!

  • June 17, 2009, 8:59 a.m. CST

    My Big Mopey Dick

    by Squashua

    Is hung low.

  • June 17, 2009, 9:11 a.m. CST

    That Skaar

    by Series7

    Sucked. The promise of a one shot turned into just a push for another spin off or story. Does War of Kings follow Marvel continuty? Also the art sucked.

  • June 17, 2009, 9:17 a.m. CST

    How long until Millar's Doom is revealed to be a Doombot?

    by rev_skarekroe

    Isn't that what they usually do when Doom does something that's out of character (like defer to some heretofore unrevealed "Master")?

  • June 17, 2009, 9:19 a.m. CST

    Nah, Didio's not Jemas in disguise.

    by rev_skarekroe

    If he was all the new DC comics would be rip-offs of contemporary movies and TV shows.

  • June 17, 2009, 9:21 a.m. CST

    Bring back Doom and the Master of Evil

    by Series7

    That mini series was awesome!

  • June 17, 2009, 9:32 a.m. CST

    Get rid of "The Kid"

    by OptimusCrime

    Everytime I want to read a review of a particular book, it always seems to be written by this child. Props to him for getting himself out there, but his reviews definitely are reminiscent of the 8 year old that he is. Let him stick to his own site.

  • June 17, 2009, 9:42 a.m. CST

    Fuck you! Early 80's Buck kicks ass.

    by Dingbatty

    You are no true Gen X-er.

  • June 17, 2009, 9:43 a.m. CST

    Subtitles...

    by AndrewGol

    We'll be talking about the new Clone Saga book Marvel announced soon. Don't worry

  • June 17, 2009, 9:50 a.m. CST

    Ding

    by optimous_douche

    Allow me to offer proof as to why I do love that old show, but look back with a groan these days.<p> http://tinyurl.com/m37lwl And you're right I'm in that damn Gen X - Gen Y middle ground...

  • June 17, 2009, 9:52 a.m. CST

    When I was a "Kid"

    by Slaphappy Slim

    I also found it annoying when the cover didn't match the story.

  • June 17, 2009, 9:58 a.m. CST

    roy of the rovers

    by foree forehead

    used to love that comic in ireland. fantastic stuff, what comics are all about really. the banana-like bend that roy could put on a ball would make beckham weep. there was another football comic about a kid who would regain his ability to speak if he scored a hat-trick in a cup final... but he'd also lose his brilliant football ability. sadly (and fantastically for us readers) he'd always score two goals and shank a penalty off the post in the last minute to remain mute forever... good lord.

  • June 17, 2009, 10:01 a.m. CST

    I loved FF 567 too

    by sean bean

    But it's the first time that Millar & Hitch's run has really struck a chord - it's taken this long for them to remember what it is they do best - widescreen ass-kickery. Unfortunately, this is why their run will ultimately be judged a failure. But I'm glad to see that Hitch has kept to a monthly schedule. Oh, and the Omega Box was flagged up waaaay too many times in this issue to not be a plot point in future issues.

  • June 17, 2009, 10:04 a.m. CST

    A book with the title "Assholes"

    by Snookeroo

    has to warn the reader that it is intended for mature readers?

  • June 17, 2009, 10:05 a.m. CST

    Baytor and Hawkeye

    by Joenathan

    I think Baytor had some valid points on Walking Dead. Sometimes Kirkman's characters lack a distinctive and consistant personality. Take Dale for instance, why is it suddenly his turn to be a contrary dickhead? It makes no sense at this point, given his character's past actions. Its a bad thing if all of your characters can ONLY be described in a single sentence, but, at the same time, you need that single sentence descriptor to build good characters off of and Kirkman's characters in the Walking Dead each lack that single unique trait to build their personality off of. This guy is the smart ass and here's why. his lady is the bitch and here's how she got that way, etc. I think thats why, while I really enjoy the series over-all, I don't really connect to the characters emotionally. Remember when Glenn went all weepy in Woodbury? Why? How come nothing ever came of it.<br><br>Honestly, I feel like being tough on Kirkman, because he can be a pompous ass about his "creator owned" bullshit. Did you read that stupid Image/Invincible #63 parody of Cap #600 announcement? A. Lame. B. What? Marvel is bad for trying (and failing) to drum up more interest in a dying medium? C. A little sour grapes from perennial also-ran Image comics, perhaps. Douchebags.<Br><br>On a happier note... Do eveyone see the last New Avengers Reunion? Hawkeye was wearing a turtle neck with a blazer! Fucking awesome.

  • June 17, 2009, 10:10 a.m. CST

    I'm a bit depressed.

    by maelstrom_ZERO

    <p>I mean, I'd love to get into this whole "death of Batman" thing and start reading all the related comics, like "Battle for the Cowl" and the like. Except, it seems that everything surrounding Batman's "death" is so poorly written and executed, that it's just not worth it. Especially after I read the whole "Batman: RIP" comic. Utter confusion there.</p> <p>I think I'll just quietly slink off to the side and reread Brubaker's run on Captain America. At least that death of a character was well-written and made sense.</p>

  • June 17, 2009, 10:22 a.m. CST

    Now 'tis I who pity you...

    by Psynapse

    The Kirkman Invincible #63 announcement was intended parody and rather funny at that.

  • June 17, 2009, 10:22 a.m. CST

    Loglines

    by Gigolo Joe

    It would help if the reviewers would maybe devote one sentence to what the comic is about before going into their feelings on it. I have no idea what 'Philly' is. If you want me to go buy it, at least give me a logline.

  • June 17, 2009, 10:27 a.m. CST

    Red Robin

    by Ambush Bug

    I'm not saying the book was perfect, but at least Tim isn't moping around Gotham like the rest of the crew. Tim is going in his own direction. He doesn't have a master. He's looking for peace and understanding. Hell, if I didn't know better, I'd think Chuck Dixon was writing this book because it's right up his alley. And I agree, there was something off about the crosscutting of scenes in this issue. It's like an entire section was out of order or something on the way to the press. Still the premise is what made me like this book. Will it deliver? Who knows?

  • June 17, 2009, 10:32 a.m. CST

    Psynapse

    by Joenathan

    I know it was a parody. I know that. God damn, man...

  • June 17, 2009, 10:32 a.m. CST

    maelstrom_ZERO

    by Kid Z

    Uh, you'll probably be rethinking your Captain America view when you find out about the lame-ass way they decided to resurrect Steve Rogers... "that wasn't an ordinary gun" indeed! At least we'll get Cap giving Tony Stark a well-deserved asskicking before they probably team up to take down Norman Osbourne under orders from Obama. (Kinda sad it's so easy to forcast plots these days, isn't it?)

  • June 17, 2009, 10:34 a.m. CST

    You're right, Gigolo Joe: Logline for PHILLY

    by Prof

    Silly egotistical super-heroes in Philadelphia who get into a dust up with Vampires. Sorry that didn't come through in the review.

  • June 17, 2009, 10:35 a.m. CST

    Doom out of character?

    by Joenathan

    In the mindfuck he was ready to fight and crush, revealing that he obviously didn't consider this person his master, at least anymore and was only being polite, but now... oh, yeah, Doom is gonna come back an kick some ass... Unless that giant shark ate him...

  • June 17, 2009, 10:35 a.m. CST

    Red Robin

    by Prof

    I Byrne-stole the issue and chose not to spend money on it. The art kind of killed it for me. Shallow, I know, but its true.

  • June 17, 2009, 10:37 a.m. CST

    Batman and Red Robin

    by Mr.FTW

    With Batman it seems like the missing issue from Battle for the Cowl. The entire thing happend in what seemed like it should have been between the last two pages of BftC. If they were even going to run an issue like this why wasn't it part of that story? I agree with others that coming out after the fact makes the issue redundant and pointless. <p> Red Robin, something I want to really like but there are way too many things about it that are leaving me cold. First, I can't really get past the fact that they are calling him Red Robin or the costume. With the multiverse being brought back and characters from all over in the main DCU it doesn't make sense. They have introduced so many characters from Kingdom Come already, we've had multiple Supermen and even multiple Wildcats. Why would the KC Dick Grayson/Red Robin be excluded, he already exists. In KC thr RR costume was a combo of the old Robing and Batman costumes and it worked there and it was obvious what it was with no explination. In this new RR title there is no explination for why Tim is wearing it. Tim wore the old Robin costume, what one time before they updated it? There is no reason why he would wear a costme like that especially since his previous one was and is so much better. It was still red and black but more like Batman's than the KC design. If they just added a cowl to it it would make much more sense and be believable he would make that decision. It just doesn't fly that Tim would wear a pre-established costume that he doesn't know anything about.<p> Also the characterization for Tim has been so skewed. Tim has always been the most independant of the Batkids, he was the most logical and the best detecive. After IC when his dad died he wasn't very happy about Bruce adopting him and he struck out on his own. To do a complete 180 and want to be called Tim Wayne and refer to Bruce as his dad is just really bizzare. It doesn't mesh at all with the way Tim has been written for a long time.<p>Tim's motivation doesn't make sense either. Bruce got hit with the Omega beams or whatever they were in FC and that displaced him in time or whatever it did and we as readers all know that but there is no evidence inside the fictional world that Bruce has been displaced or is alive. Like I said Tim was depicted as the best detective, even Bruce aknowlaged his abilities more than once as being the best and with time being better than himself. To have Tim going off on some wild goose chase isn't in character for him. Granted he lost his current father figure and has lost a lot so far from his parents, best friend and at one time his former girlfriend (before the brought Spoiler back fro Africa WTF) but it just doesn't gel.<p>I really like the Tim Drake character and if they want him to go adventuring that's great, if they want to establish him on his own fantastic. But the direction so far, I can't get behind it.

  • June 17, 2009, 10:53 a.m. CST

    Uhh Okay...

    by Psynapse

    Do you like waffles? Because you sure do it quite a bit.

  • June 17, 2009, 10:53 a.m. CST

    Just read Streets of Gotham

    by i_banged_harley_quinn

    I just read Dini's Streets of Gotham. It's actually excellent in my opinion. It's way better than Red Robin or Batman. And to be honest I kinda liked it more than Batman and Robin.

  • June 17, 2009, 11:09 a.m. CST

    I DO like waffles!

    by Joenathan

    Thanks for asking.

  • June 17, 2009, 11:15 a.m. CST

    u.wish.u.banged.harley.quinn...

    by Prof

    Plan on picking up Streets of Gotham tonite. Paul rarely lets me down. :)

  • June 17, 2009, 11:36 a.m. CST

    To anyone who has time to complain about the kid

    by Lolthien

    You guys DO realize you are taking this whole comic book review thing WAY too f'in seriously right? "Everytime I want to read a review of a particular book.." what?... you actually spend time wanting to read a review of a specific comic book, and when this 8 year old does an admirable job of explaining the story you complain? What world do you live in? Were there not enough cuss words? Not enough meta-physical ramifications of spider-man looking like venom? Perhaps you wanted someone to name drop an author's name and say how much he sucks.. or how much he doesn't suck as much as everyone says...... I read this column in lieu of reading the comics themselves, because it is sort of like the cliff's notes versions of those comics. And frankly, they could have someone write the article in Japanese, and if I couldn't read it I'd move on to the next story... because really, is it worth getting angry over?

  • June 17, 2009, 11:37 a.m. CST

    Actually, Joenathan, I didn't read the book.

    by rev_skarekroe

    It just seemed out of character, and I really just wanted to make a Doombots reference.

  • June 17, 2009, 11:42 a.m. CST

    Spidey

    by rgc123

    From what I've heard from the last couple issues of Amazing Spider-Man, it looks like Marvel is FINALLY trying to put Spider-Man at the forefront of the Marvel Universe again. Having Norman Osborn be the number #1 baddie forces Spider-Man to be at the center of everything...which is the way it should be.

  • June 17, 2009, 11:48 a.m. CST

    Rev

    by Joenathan

    Who doesn't.<br><br>And honestly, I'm still waiting for that particular reveal.

  • June 17, 2009, 11:51 a.m. CST

    Has anyone read Cap #600 yet?

    by Joenathan

    I haven't been to the LCS yet. How does Bucky Carrie fit in?

  • June 17, 2009, 11:57 a.m. CST

    RE: Prof

    by i_banged_harley_quinn

    Actually my wife knows my fascination with Harley and she was cool enough to buy an outfit and do a little role playing for me. Every once in a while I do get to bang Harley. I'm not even gonna mention what it is I have to do for her though!

  • June 17, 2009, 12:05 p.m. CST

    Cap #600

    by Prof

    The online synopsis at Bleeding Cool was enough for me. No need to spend money on a placeholder until July when the "real" must-buy Captain America comes out. Reborn by Brubaker and Hitch has me first in line for each issue.

  • June 17, 2009, 12:17 p.m. CST

    Bug, Red Robin

    by Laserhead

    I like the premise too. Heck, I love the premise. But, as written, the premise seems to have no credible reason for existing. You know? How about giving Tim a REASON he thinks Bruce is still alive somewhere? How about giving him some mysterious clues to FOLLOW? It seemed like we just got random, badly illustrated scenes without motivation or plan. I'd love a Tim Drake international action series where he's basically Cane, travelling the world doing good turns while also following clues as to what happened to Bruce Wayne. But this, this was gobbledy-gook.

  • June 17, 2009, 12:19 p.m. CST

    Millar is killin it on FF

    by StrokerX

    this latest issue was awesome. Looks like he's been reading up on his Genjutsu. Cookie to the 1st who gets that.

  • June 17, 2009, 12:20 p.m. CST

    Final Crisis HC

    by Laserhead

    This is interesting... Final Crisis reads entirely differently as a collection, with the two Superman Beyond issues and Resist included in the middle of the main series.<p>I'm not done with it, but it's a completely different reading experience (obviously-- but this time it works A LOT better).

  • June 17, 2009, 12:23 p.m. CST

    Scott Pilgrim

    by Joenathan

    I finally got around to picking these up. tons of fun. I recommend them to anyone who likes Clugston's Blue Monday series.

  • June 17, 2009, 12:24 p.m. CST

    Mr.FTW about Red Robin

    by Ambush Bug

    I completely agree with you on BATMAN. The issue reads like they had two scenes that they needed to print, then told Winick to pad the rest of it with filler and redundancy. But I liked the two scenes I mentioned.<br><br> On Red Robin, I was wondering if you read the last ROBIN series, because a lot of the things you talk about are answered in there. And in the issue itself, Red Robin explains that he's anticipating doing things that make him not want to be associated with Batman & Robin, so he chose the Red Robin costume because Jason Todd had already associated the suit with grey area heroics.<br><br> I DO share your annoyance with the Multiverse. Writers say it opens doors for storytelling. But for me, it makes things much more confusing and leaves me not giving a shit about any of it because none of the stories really matter or can be rewritten by jaunting to another universe. If everyone is so pissed that Bruce is dead, why not skip over to Earth 69 and snag the Batman from there? It just makes everything so uncertain and loose for my tastes.<br><br> And Tim does know about the Red RObin costume because Fabian Niceinza wrote some pretty darn good final issues to the ROBIN series with Jason Todd (in Red Robin costume) fighting Tim for the name of Robin.<br><br> In the last ROBIN series is also where Tim takes Bruce's last name, not because he wants to shun his real father's name, but because Tim was legally adopted by Bruce after his death. It's quite common for adopted children to take their new parent's name.<br><br> The last couple of years of ROBIN have also shown Tim going down a darker path. This was also shown in Johns' TEEN TITANS series where a future version of Tim reveals him to have taken the role of a very dark version of Batman (sporting guns, none-the-fuckin-less). It wasn't just the death of Tim's father that puts him over the edge. It's the death of Superboy. The death and shady resurrection of Spoiler. And now the death of Bruce that has lead him towards a more violent and destructive path. Fabs wrote some especially effective final issues of ROBIN that really illustrate how far Tim has fallen as Tim recklessly endangers civilians, gets his hair burned off and is forced to wear a cowl very similar to Red Robin's. All that and in the first issue of RED ROBIN, we see Tim feeling betrayed by Nightwing for taking Damian in as Robin and not him. I'd say that'd be reason for anyone to have a bit of a darker dispoisition.<br><br> I just think that if they're having someone go on a quest to find Bruce, it'd be Tim moreso than anyone to see through the bullshit of RIP & FC and search for one of the few people he has left in his life that he cares deeply about. Plus this is a chance to see those adventures we never saw when Bruce "walked the earth" in order to become Batman. As much as Dick deserves to be the new Batman, Tim is becoming the next and only logical true hero to step into the shoes. This series looks to be giving him more experience to one day do so.<br><br> And I thought the art was ok in a gritty, GOTHAM CENTRAL sort of way.<br><br> Then again, the series could suck ass. How the hell am I to know?

  • June 17, 2009, 12:26 p.m. CST

    Red Robin-- again

    by Laserhead

    Again, I think it's a GREAT idea for a series. But the first issue was written as if by randomly assembling those refrigerator magnets that have nouns and verbs. And the art? Come on... if that's decent art, the medium's hit a low.

  • June 17, 2009, 12:30 p.m. CST

    Yeah, Laser...

    by Ambush Bug

    I hope they clear that up in future issues. I seriously think there was a printer error in the issue and pages were printed out of order. I think Tim's sudden realization that Bruce is alive is more of an act of desperation than something based on fact. Tim's literally's got nothing left to cling to, so he flips, makes a bold accusation, and uses it as an excuse to get out of the painful position of watching Damian flip around in his tights.

  • June 17, 2009, 12:32 p.m. CST

    RED ROBIN art

    by Ambush Bug

    It reminded me of John McCrea from the old HITMAN series. I loved his stuff, so I guess, I didn't mind it as much as others.

  • June 17, 2009, 1:23 p.m. CST

    Red Robin art

    by Prof

    :) No need to justify. Art appreciation is purely a visceral thing. Well, unless someone claims to LOVE a George Tuska/Vince Colletta combination. ;)

  • June 17, 2009, 1:24 p.m. CST

    Bug

    by Mr.FTW

    I did miss out on the ending of Robin, I didn't see the fight with Jason in the Red Robin costume, I knew he wore it durring his multiverse jumping adventures but didn't realize he wore in in the main DCU. I'll have to catch up with back issues.<p> I totally get the Tim has been through his fair share of turmoil and I have no problem with his decent to a darker character and becoming more like Bruce than anyone else. And they have shown him going to extremes trying to recreate SUperboy and questing after the Lazarus pits and fight ing Dick. It just still seems a little out of character to me but maybe the back issues will fill in the shift.<p> I just really like the Tim Drake character, he was introduced when I was in jr high and really got into not just reading but collecting comics. Dick might be the original but he has been Nightwing most of the time I've read comics and Tim was Robin to me. I just want to see the character done right, maybe this new series will take him a good direction.<p> I still don't like the Kindom Come costume being used though.

  • June 17, 2009, 1:43 p.m. CST

    Tim's motivation

    by Laserhead

    Right, Bug-- I got that he's searching for Bruce purely out of desperation... and that's total bullshit. "Superman walked out cradling Bruce's fried skeleton, but I just know he's alive somewhere... because I want him to be!"<p>This might echo Tim's horribly wrong characterization in Titans (cloning superkid), but since when is Tim Drake this Pathetic? He's like a deranged ninny. How hard would it have been to give Tim some credible motive for engaging in this quest? How hard would it be to insert some kind of plot machination to set all this moving? But there's none. Zero. Some of the laziest writing I've seen in a long, long time. 'We can't be bothered to actually set up this situation, or make it sync organically to the established characterization of this figure.' I like John Mcrea, but I think this artist makes George Tuska look like... um, Bryan Hitch. Yeah.

  • June 17, 2009, 2 p.m. CST

    Can someone explain a few things to me

    by Rufferto

    about this Batman is dead thing. 1. How does everyone know he is dead? did Superman tell them? Is it an assumption? What do they think happened to him? 2. If Damian is Batman's kid then he can't possibly be anything other then the baby from Son of the Demon. If so why Did Batman say he was drugged? He was not drugged when he fucked Talia. Sorry. Also I'm pretty sure Talia gave the baby up. Why is nothing more about this revealed. I don't think Morrison is usually lazy continuity wise. He mentions the problems yet doesn't always acknowledge enough to explain them. That kind of drives me more crazy. I still think Damian sucks and Bruce should of been tougher on him. He told Tim to take off the Robin costume when he wore it the first time. I don't agree that he would favor someone just because they are blood.

  • June 17, 2009, 2:02 p.m. CST

    And i also want to know why Talia is such a

    by Rufferto

    bitch now? But i guess I can't fault people's interpretations of the character.

  • June 17, 2009, 2:04 p.m. CST

    It's like Talia is crazy

    by Rufferto

    her kid is crazy and Batman was for the most part indifferent.

  • June 17, 2009, 2:05 p.m. CST

    Red Robin is a really dumb name for a super-hero.

    by cookylamoo

    It brings to mind that stupid song, "When The Red Red Robin Comes Bob Bob Bobbin' Along" plus it reminds you of all the other bozo heroes with Red in their names like Red Tornado, Red Devil, Red Ronin, and Red Raven. it sacrifices credibility in the name of mindless alliteration. The only thing dumber would be to make him fat and call him Round Robin.

  • June 17, 2009, 2:07 p.m. CST

    And the idea of Red Robin is ass

    by Rufferto

    Do the need to keep giving someone this dorky outfit or something? is that in the DC rule book? Lol fucking Jason Todd and his pathetic characterization took up the mantle of everything from nightwing to the easter bunny.

  • June 17, 2009, 2:08 p.m. CST

    Rufferto

    by Laserhead

    Yep. There you have it. Whereas when Captain America "died" it was clear what had happened and the community mourned him; at DC, we don't even know what people think or why they think it, with regard to Batman.<p>It's not Morrison, I think, but editorial mandates and back-tracking. For instance, a couple months ago, in an interview Didio explained that Hawkman and Hawkgirl died in Final Crisis. Then a month later he comes back and says that the Hawkwoman and Hawkman who died in Final Crisis were alternate universe doppelgangers. DC's entire universe is being cobbled together on-the-fly, without regard to logic or consistency, without any kind of plan (or without STICKING to a plan).

  • June 17, 2009, 2:15 p.m. CST

    Rufferto

    by Mr.FTW

    The reason everone knows Bruce is "dead" is because Superman carries the blasted remains of Batman's body from the rubble at the end of Final Crisis. Thing is at the very end the reader sees Bruce alive in and Australian outback type setting. Daeksied blasted Batman with the Omega Solution or something like that. Since it was Grant Morrison no one really knows what is going on but the common though is Bruce is displaced in time. It's up in the air where Bruce is and who the body Superman was carrying belongs too.<p> Daimen is Bruce's son by way of cloning from the Morrison run on Batman. Damien is not aware of this though.

  • June 17, 2009, 2:16 p.m. CST

    Yay! Happy Music!

    by TedKordLives

    Sorry, that's a joke from MST3K's 'Pumaman' ep.

  • June 17, 2009, 2:20 p.m. CST

    Suck It DC!

    by TedKordLives

    You suck, your Universes suck, your non-existent plan sucks, your continuity sucks, your editors REALLY suck, your editor-in-chief is a kill-crazy psychopath, and as an organization you have no idea what you're doing. <P> So bring back Ted already, ass monkeys.

  • June 17, 2009, 2:23 p.m. CST

    Assholes

    by BLWiseass

    I've actually read both issues so far, and it is indeed funny and well worth a look. BTW the cover says for (im)mature audiences only, or something to that effect.

  • June 17, 2009, 2:24 p.m. CST

    Not kidding.

    by TedKordLives

    I've been done with DC since Infinite Crisis (and I don't even have those issues anymore-I guess I have different issues now hehe) and I'll continue to boycot DC until Ted comes back (to life, not as a fucking zombie lantern). <P> Ok, I got Ostrander's Suicide Squad series and the Blue and Gold arc of BG, but the Suicide Squad was where I first saw Ted in action, and, imo, is one of the best runs in comic book history. DC, typically, hasn't reprinted it yet, but do yourself a favor and track down Ostrander's original 65 issue SS run. It's fucking amazing.

  • June 17, 2009, 2:24 p.m. CST

    So... what you're all saying is...

    by Joenathan

    Joe Q does an awesome job, right?

  • June 17, 2009, 2:30 p.m. CST

    On the other hand...

    by TedKordLives

    I'm really excited by Dark Reign in general and especially by Skaar's coming to Earth. I haven't been reading his series but the idea of Hulk having a family and finally putting aside the 'Hulk Smash' persona is very compelling to me. Bruce has always been my fave Marvel character (Not Hulk, Bruce), and it pains me that he immediately reverted to stupid Hulk after WWH. Supposedly that's going to be explained and I cannot wait for that. Also, I cannot wait for Jeph Loeb to fucking fuck off with his inc(red)ibly lame Red Hulk who is far too powerful and weakens the entire Marvel Universe as a result. Yeah, he sucks that much. He fucking 'killed' Silver Surfer and Terrax. That's just stupid and, as I said, weakens the structure of the Marvel Universe. Ugh.

  • June 17, 2009, 2:44 p.m. CST

    Red Robin is a hamburger chain.

    by Snookeroo

    Maybe Batman eats there. Probably too many carbs, though.

  • June 17, 2009, 2:45 p.m. CST

    A Hamburge Chain!?!?

    by Joenathan

    Tie Me Up!

  • June 17, 2009, 2:49 p.m. CST

    I am saying that (about Joe Q)

    by Laserhead

    Yes-- I think what happened with Spider-Man was uninspired and retarded, and hasn't led to better stories that couldn't have been told otherwise; I think decompressed storytelling designed to replicate movie and TV rhythms is a sham; I also have general disdain for Bendis' writing and semi-disdain for Millar's writing (Millar, at least, can be exciting). The DC characters, for whatever reason, at this moment in time, mean more to me than Marvels. And with all that said, I have to admit that Marvel is running their universe like a well-oiled machine, and writers are syncing across titles with exceptional dexterity, creating the impression of one vast story, in a world with its own pulse. And many writers are taking the current condition of its universe and characters and telling some really inspired stories. Like Hercules, for Christ's sake. Or Agents of Atlas. Or the dimensions of characterization now being given to generations of villains. And the story has a lot of forward momentum. Lots of things happening with lots of ramifications.<p>And then over at DC, its all a bugaboo, with even the creators seeming vaguely confused about just what's supposed to be going on in their own backyard.

  • June 17, 2009, 2:49 p.m. CST

    Gather around and piss on Dr. Doom, Marvel

    by cookylamoo

    Bust him, Jail him, replace him, humiliate him. He's still the best fucking villain in comics.

  • June 17, 2009, 2:50 p.m. CST

    Red Robin

    by TedKordLives

    Yeah, since I moved to Texas, I've been seeing them everywhere. I had no idea it was Tim tho. I thought they gave Jason Todd a series. That's weird. And changing his name, to me, is an insult to his (biological)father and diminishes the impact of Identity Crisis, one of the most emotionally affecting comics I've ever read.

  • June 17, 2009, 2:53 p.m. CST

    Cookylamoo

    by TedKordLives

    Damn straight. Doom is one of the best CHARACTERS in comics. He doesn't know he's a bad guy, and that's why I love him. He's the hero of his own story. Did you read Brubaker's Books of Doom? Freaking amazing retelling of Doom's origin.

  • June 17, 2009, 2:56 p.m. CST

    Tim's name change

    by Laserhead

    Yeah-- what's that about? "My father raised me till I was seventeen, then he died in my arms after being killed because I'm a super-hero. Now I'm gonna change my name to the billionaire's who adopted me. Good thing Dad's dead, or he'd probably be pissed!"

  • June 17, 2009, 2:56 p.m. CST

    Sorry for the bombardment.

    by TedKordLives

    It's a slow day at work, and the comics columns usually crash my computer for some reason. So when I actually get to these TBs, I like to make it count.

  • June 17, 2009, 2:57 p.m. CST

    Damian is a clone?

    by Rufferto

    I don't know. When I heard that I got more confused. I perceive other explanations. Like some sort of genetic fertilization or a bizarre experiment on the embryo. YOU see, of course Morrison knows this digs up Son of the Demon. It was a good story and I would have loved to see it become canon. This looks like it's not. It also sounds like Batman never had sex with Talia at all.

  • June 17, 2009, 2:59 p.m. CST

    It must be Superboy Prime's fault

    by Rufferto

    him and that pesky wall he kept punching.

  • June 17, 2009, 3 p.m. CST

    Laserhead

    by TedKordLives

    I think the eds at DC have become crack-addicted gibbons. And not Dave Gibbons, like monkey-gibbons. They seem like they're not even paying attention anymore. Me, I like continuity, that's why I'm a Marvel Zombie again. <P> And not the flesh-eating kind.

  • June 17, 2009, 3:05 p.m. CST

    Hamburger chain...

    by Mr.FTW

    Yeah, they have a heart clogger called the Royal Red Robin Burger, it comes with a ridiculous amount of bacon, multiple cheeses and a fried egg on it.

  • June 17, 2009, 3:09 p.m. CST

    passages about damian on Wiki

    by Rufferto

    "Genetically perfected and grown in an artificial womb, Damian was intended to be a formidable warrior." I didn't think it was possible but this confuses me even more.

  • June 17, 2009, 3:17 p.m. CST

    Damian asks his Grandfather....

    by cookylamoo

    "So Ra's, when are you going to invite ME to the desert for a pointless sword fight."

  • June 17, 2009, 3:18 p.m. CST

    C'mon.

    by TedKordLives

    Bruce has laid more chicks than a hen at a Tyson farm. Just make Son of the Demon canon already. <P> Just another example of DC dropping the ball and kicking it onto a neighbor's roof.

  • June 17, 2009, 3:20 p.m. CST

    its so gay that Tim is jealous of that

    by Rufferto

    sniveling little shit Damian. I agree that it's out of character. It sounds like they are giving him a identity complex. O boy! I can't wait for him to take on as many personas as Jason Todd.

  • June 17, 2009, 3:24 p.m. CST

    Cooky-

    by TedKordLives

    Don't you mean a shirtless sword fight? <P> Ra's will not fight you unless you're both topless.

  • June 17, 2009, 3:29 p.m. CST

    I have the same rule

    by Joenathan

  • June 17, 2009, 3:29 p.m. CST

    Hahahaa cookylamoo

    by Rufferto

    that's gold right there.

  • June 17, 2009, 3:32 p.m. CST

    For me it's pantsless fighting.

    by TedKordLives

    Talk about leveling the playing field.

  • June 17, 2009, 3:53 p.m. CST

    Tim Drake should be the new Blue Beetle.

    by TedKordLives

    Fuck Jaime Reyes. Fuck him up his stupid ass. I hope Ted explodes out of the scarab, tearing JR into little chunks. <P> Tim really had an appreciation for Ted when they were in Birds of Prey. In fact, the idea was that Tim was going to quit being Robin and become the new Beetle, with Ted taking an 'Oracle' position. DC nixed the idea after the seeds had already been sown, leaving Ted with an unnecessary heart condition that was promptly ignored in the DCU at large and ridiculed in ICBINTJL. <P> Which WAS supposed to be canon, until DC decided they were just going to start making shit up and ignoring whatever didn't fit with their new 'ideas'. <P> Fuck DC.

  • June 17, 2009, 4:05 p.m. CST

    Damn, that new FF storyline sound cool.

    by TedKordLives

    I may get the trade of it. Doom is definitely my 3rd favorite character in comics. Doom vs Prehistoric Whale-Shark? Illustrated by Brian Hitch? Yeah, that's worth a few of my bucks. Especially since I get a 35% discount on my trades.

  • June 17, 2009, 4:13 p.m. CST

    Anyone interested in

    by Series7

    Somemore reviews feel free check out Mymavra. Having some technical difficulties right now so there are no spaces and the comment section is down for right now. <P> http://tinyurl.com/kwffox

  • June 17, 2009, 4:24 p.m. CST

    Ted...

    by Joenathan

    Its not really versus...

  • June 17, 2009, 4:29 p.m. CST

    I have to admit, in "Blackest Night"

    by cookylamoo

    I'm going to be rooting for the Zombies.

  • June 17, 2009, 4:30 p.m. CST

    Joe

    by TedKordLives

    Right, he's pretty fucked up at that point. At least, that's what it sounds like. Still...

  • June 17, 2009, 4:30 p.m. CST

    Not as gay as that Imperial Shock Trooper Statue.

    by cookylamoo

    The Emperor lets his troops wear pink now?

  • June 17, 2009, 4:44 p.m. CST

    As simple, logical reason for Red Robin's quest

    by Laserhead

    The last image of FC, when Bruce is drawing the image of a bat on a cave wall? In a couple places all over the globe, new cave drawings have appeared that were previously unrecorded but still date as being hundreds of thousands of years old, and they look like Batman's emblem. Dick thinks he's grasping at straws and blinded by grief, but Tim insists on leaving to investigate. A secret evil group is also investigating and comes into combat with him.<p>Or you could go with 'Wah-wah nobody loves me, I'm going to search the world for no particular reason and with no discernible plan. Wah-wah."

  • June 17, 2009, 4:59 p.m. CST

    Laser

    by optimous_douche

    Would you please take over writing duties on Red Robin?<p> That's a great explanation, that should be in a book somewhere.

  • June 17, 2009, 5:33 p.m. CST

    *looks at the DC-talk* *hangs head* *sighs*

    by Thalya

    This is why I haven't been to my LCS in weeks..<BR><BR>It's sad that DC's fallen so far - they had a pretty great ballgame going in the prelude to Infinite Crisis (which was when I got onboard comics - and mind you, this was back in the days of House of M and Civil War when Marvel could do no right). But ever since IC DC's kind of crashed and burned with poor editorial communication and seemingly-delayed storylines that went on forever and didn't satisfy for the hype. Why does it seem like the 52 writers had big big ideas for immediate stories, but then put off those ideas for a year or two as DC decided to milk the interim filler as though it were two cows instead of a single goat?<BR><BR>I never thought I'd say it, but kudos to Marvel for playing a better, larger game, comics and movies.<BR><BR><BR>I will say though, I agree on Booster Gold, definitely a bright spot in my pull list that one. Even better that it's Jurgens' baby still, he's doing great work on it, and it's situated in a better context in the DCU and story engine-wise.<BR><BR>That, and, really - skip the big name Batbooks! Manhunter's still being written by Andreyko and Dini's writing reformed Riddler and Harley Quinn! 'Nuff said!

  • June 17, 2009, 5:48 p.m. CST

    Erin Gray - major babe.

    by hallmitchell

    That brings back memories.

  • June 17, 2009, 6:24 p.m. CST

    Walking Dead and Red Robin

    by Homer Sexual

    Let's start with Tim Drake Wayne. I never followed the Robin comic but always enjoyed the character in Teen Titans. From reading here, it really sounds like Tim's been ruined as a character. Bummer because he was somewhat fleshed out in TT, neither the second-fiddle playa that Dick was nor the Dark Asshole that Bruce was. Sounds like he's now got the worst of all worlds, with a seriously retarded name to boot. <p> I was at my LTS (local tattoo shop) talking some comics and I mentioned that I think Kirkman blows, that he is one-dimensional and can't (also doesn't) write women at all, not even in Marvel Zombies. I liked him in MZ1, but 2 sucked. Also, he destroyed Ultimate X-Men. Destroyed.It. <p> I have read 2 volumes of Walking Dead and find it very entertaining. But his characters are still not very well developed, again especially the women. Also, it is not very original. I think Kirkman is ok and that's about it. So he's fine when he isn't full of himself. <p> Finally, while being an old guy, I kind of like Pet Avengers, except that I HATE anything affiliated with Aunt May. Also, why are all the animals male? The art, I must say, is pretty great.

  • June 17, 2009, 6:26 p.m. CST

    BRING BACK DOOM AND THE MASTERS

    by Series7

    Of Evil. Man I loved that thing.

  • June 17, 2009, 6:47 p.m. CST

    Reformed Harley Quinn?

    by CarmillaVonDoom

    Sounds like a horrible, horrible idea. Right up there with the "heroic" Catwoman. Riddler, I can see that (barely)

  • June 17, 2009, 7:35 p.m. CST

    Harley? Reformed?

    by Thalya

    I mistyped. Or, at least from the BftC: The Underground lead-in, it sounds like the whole cast of Gotham City Sirens will be delightfully gray zone. How Harley, the Catwomen, Poison Ivy, and Riddler will all get along, let alone be squeaky clean is beyond me.

  • June 17, 2009, 7:39 p.m. CST

    Coming late to the party.....

    by gooseud

    1. How did the Kid NOT review Pet Avengers? Thats the most epic gaffe I've ever seen in this column, that should have been right in his wheelhouse. The Kid: "Screw that kiddy Pet Avengers crap, when is Herogasm #2 comin out??" 2. Walking Dead has been killin it, Kirkman is a mad genius but somehow keeps that book from flying off the rails (although just barely, usually). I disagree that people arent characterized. I've always said this, but Adlard's art sucks. Its always sucked. He is the reason you cant tell the difference between half the characters in the book. If you had a better artist, you wouldnt be saying people werent characterized. 3. God, that whole DC pooch-screwing on Batman sounds so incredibly lame, so his fried body somehow ISNT dead? Leave it to DC to take a golden opportunity and just botch it to high heaven. I've said it before, but this just shows what a true bad ass MFer Brubaker is, that guy is God. His Cap run has taken DC as an entire company and sodomized it with no vaseline. 4. I'm not uber familiar with DC like down to the last detail, but I'm pretty casually familiar, so I need a little clarification: am I way off or was Superboy pretty awesome? Was he lame? I'm just going off his death in Infinite Crisis, which was pretty awesome and heroic. Am I barking up the wrong tree here?

  • June 17, 2009, 7:42 p.m. CST

    Dr. Doom

    by gooseud

    is unquestionably awesome. One of the few villians who, if he conquered the world, might not actually kill millions of people and turn it into the cliched "Millar in Wanted and Old Man Logan" hell on earth.

  • June 17, 2009, 7:45 p.m. CST

    Hawkman

    by gooseud

    Exhibit A of a character who, by all rights and appearences, should be awesome, but isnt, or at least appears to have been never utilized as an A team player. I think he is a victim, as a character, of the "no killing" ridiculousness in comics, as obviously if he ever actually hit a normal person with that mace they would die on the spot. So he is stuck with "He-Man the cartoon syndrome", where He-Man carried a sword but always preferred to take the villains and toss them in a mud puddle instead.

  • June 17, 2009, 8:11 p.m. CST

    The Pet Avengers

    by Continentalop

    If Aragorn hadn't been killed and eaten in that horrible Punisher story involving one of Kraven's sons, he could have been a member. <p> Every animal team needs a flying horse.

  • June 17, 2009, 8:13 p.m. CST

    Goose, Dr. Doom conquering the world

    by Continentalop

    You ever read "1984"? Imagine something like that. But with Doombots. <p>

  • June 17, 2009, 8:22 p.m. CST

    Dr. Doom's master

    by Continentalop

    I also have to say this sounds like a gimmick. Easiest way to give a villain cred is by making a story where he is tougher/more powerful/or higher up the chain than an already established villain. You want to prove how tough your cosmic villain is, you just write some lame line and have Reed Richards recite "His power level is greater than Galactus." <p> The only way this will work for me (and I have a feeling this is what Millar is planning) is if Doom defeats and destroys his Master in the end, proving that the student is now the master. <p> But truthfully, this is just a lazy way to introduce a new villain.

  • June 17, 2009, 8:49 p.m. CST

    Lolthien

    by OptimusCrime

    Alright, I didn't know I came off as angry. I also read these things in leiu of the comics themselves, I just think "The Kid" writes like an 8 year old. I don't enjoy reading his reviews. Oh, and fuck yourself, you sanctimonious shit.

  • June 17, 2009, 9:54 p.m. CST

    Danny

    by Series7

    You watching So You think you can Dance? What do you think of that new choreographer Sonya, I fucking hate her.

  • June 17, 2009, 9:54 p.m. CST

    Shit wrong fucking

    by Series7

    Forum again.

  • June 18, 2009, 2:36 a.m. CST

    Lockjaw kicks ass

    by Toby_FN_Wong

    I am glad he finally got a limited series. I love the limited series. It's full of heart. And yeah, I agree with Byrne that Lockjaw is a mutated human.

  • June 18, 2009, 3:33 a.m. CST

    Shit broke down fo real, in order:

    by SleazyG.

    Doom serves no one. FUCKING PERIOD.<p> Red Robin's burgers suck dick and the new issue completely misunderstood Tim Drake. PERIOD.<p> Ambush Bug is talkin' out his ass 'bout Tim Drake (no PERIOD or he'll punch me when I see him in a coupla days)<p> Damian, Son Of The Bat? To quote the greatest Cubs pitcher of all time, "my fuckin' ASS!" Bullshit idea executed bullshittily. Fuck that kid and everything he does. EVER.<p> And in closing, let me just say that although I adore the work put in by Mike Kunkel, I loved the one issue of SHAZAM by Baltazar and Franco more than all of Kunkel's combined cuz they weren't so dense and didn't try so hard. Dude, Mike: don't include an issue's worth of stuff in the first five pages!

  • June 18, 2009, 4:09 a.m. CST

    I meant Cubs coach, not pitcher: :Lee Elia.

    by SleazyG.

    MY FUCKIN' ASS! Google his rant, kids--it's a thing a' beauty.

  • June 18, 2009, 6:46 a.m. CST

    Thalya

    by Laserhead

    Right on, sister. I especially agree that it seemed like all these storylines were ready to explode out of IC (and they would have, if this were Marvel), and instead, creators have been sitting on them for two years, and trying awkwardly to make use of them now.<p>I'm a bigger fan of DC's characters, and I too have to say 'Well Done' to Marvel. I just can't fathom how it got this bad at DC, and every time I think things are maybe going to turn a corner and start working again, they get more and more fucked.

  • June 18, 2009, 7:21 a.m. CST

    Series7....

    by BangoSkank

    Just admitted to watching "So you think you can Dance"!!! Brawhahahaha. Well played. You just made a talkback filled with comic nerds look cool. <p> And they said it couldn't be done. <p> I gave up on Millar's Fantastic Four, and unlike X-Factor, I'm not going back anytime soon. The first storyline didn't do much for me, I thought it was very so-so. Then the Christmas story in April pissed of the little kid in me (insert pedo joke here).... So screw it. I love Doom, but have never been that big of a FF fan... What can I say, revoke my Marvel Zombie membership card if you must.

  • June 18, 2009, 7:35 a.m. CST

    Series 7

    by Laserhead

    Not only does he admit to watching 'So You Think You Can Dance', he's apparently trying to flirt with DannyGloversDickBlood. 'Yoo-hoo, Danny! Over here! ...Do you watch So You Think You Can Dance?'

  • June 18, 2009, 8:13 a.m. CST

    DC is Picking Up

    by optimous_douche

    Just very very slowly. It’s going to be a real bitch for them to gain the velocity they need to escape from the black hole of bad decisions they’ve made over the past few years. What were those mistakes? Glad you asked.<p> Mistake number one was like all things these days, they tried to play on nostalgia with FINAL CRISIS and it backfired horribly. Why, because it was a bastardized version of the original, founded in greed instead of coming from the heart just like Dukes of Hazzard, Starsky & Hutch and the list goes on.<p> The original CRISIS worked because it had never been done before and editorial committed to the event whole heartedly, plus it was only a year, which seems to be the average fan’s tolerance level for “events.”<p> This time around it was a fucking three year adventure that forced you to buy, buy, buy to even have a modicum of understanding towards the event. I’m not going to bash the main title again, because there seems to be some genuine love for it out there. Love it or hate it though, I think we all will agree the build-up titles were unnecessary and added nothing of value.<p> So, we finally get past CRISIS, but sadly the lobotomized chimp that’s running scheduling at DC decides to deliver the “fresh start” while CRISIS was going on in some cases and in almost every case the reboots seem to why to still leverage past continuity, making for a garbled god damn mess that we see across all titles.<p> If you’re going to end the world and recreate it in your image, you have to be fully committed Mr. Didio.

  • June 18, 2009, 8:41 a.m. CST

    Final Crisis deserves revisiting

    by Laserhead

    ...if you like awesome comic books, that is. Just finished the hardcover collection. As a MONTHLY or BI-MONTHLY reading experience, FC was downright unpleasant, but this is the form that will last into posterity-- the 7 issues with Superman Beyond and Submit in the middle --and it's really, really fucking great. Emotional, exciting, dense as brick with ideas and arcs. Superman Beyond #2 was the best single-issue published anywhere last year, and read as a collection, the whole thing leans more toward that kind of thing.

  • June 18, 2009, 8:46 a.m. CST

    optimous, re: "fully committed"

    by Laserhead

    I think that's THE major problem at DC right now: Didio is constantly changing horses mid-stream. They'll have a storyline in progress, and Didio asks a bunch of chumps at a convention 'what do they want to see happen', and then he runs back to the DC office giving the writers all new mandates while they're in the middle of a different story. And these mandates come from fucking convention attendees and Newsarama posters. What did Chuck Dixon say about him? Uses a ouija board to dictate storylines? Exactly.

  • June 18, 2009, 8:50 a.m. CST

    Laser

    by optimous_douche

    I refuse to give them more of my money re CRISIS, but I'll look how they are layed out and give my single issues a reread.

  • June 18, 2009, 8:54 a.m. CST

    I know this fan

    by optimous_douche

    Only wanted one thing from DC.<p> Let CRISIS blow everything (and I mean everything) the fuck up and then restart. Like I said before, we are kind of getting that now, but it just doesn't feel as grand as the first time around.

  • June 18, 2009, 8:58 a.m. CST

    I actually thought the offshoot Crisis

    by gooseud

    books werent bad. Submit was pretty cool, actually. Green Arrow's last stand (forget when that was) was pretty bad ass too. I've laways said, 60% of FC was actually an awesome idea, if presented by someone with the ability to tell a coherent story. The finale, however, was lame no matter who told it.

  • June 18, 2009, 9:05 a.m. CST

    The Problem with DC.

    by cookylamoo

    Is there are the giants, Johns, Morrison, Simone and Winnick and all the other writers scramble around trying to to get stepped on. Case in point, Starlin's forced retraction of his Hawkman retcon and the exile of Dixon and McDuffie.

  • June 18, 2009, 9:06 a.m. CST

    Sorry, I mean trying NOT to get stepped on.

    by cookylamoo

  • June 18, 2009, 9:23 a.m. CST

    Reading FC as a whole...

    by Ambush Bug

    Yeah, I plan to do that. But then again, if it reads better as a whole, then why the hell wasn't it distributed that way?<br><br> It's like saying, I love brownies, then someone making you eat two eggs, then a while later have to eat some flour, then a while later you get to eat some sugar, then a while later you get to eat some corn starch, then you get to eat food coloring, and then you're asked to jump up and down and DC tells you, voila! Brownies!<br><br> No DC! That's not brownies! That's not brownies at all! No! Those are ingredients of brownies I ate and it didn't fucking taste good! So why did you make me eat it that way when I could have sat down to a heaping plate of finished brownines and got my brownie on! Instead I now have a stomach ache!<br><BR> Shit, I just revealed my grandma's secret brownie recepie in this post...

  • June 18, 2009, 9:26 a.m. CST

    There's one thing DC could do that would fix most everything:

    by Thalya

    Johns needs to retrench.<BR><BR>End of story.<BR><BR><BR>(and for that matter, if he still needs to get his whack-a-character/instant pathos jones off, let him write a freakin' Bat-book already. Or maybe Lobo.)

  • June 18, 2009, 9:30 a.m. CST

    gooseud

    by Laserhead

    As a collected edition, FC gels into a very coherent story, and it operates on the reader much, much better. I think it's a major work now. Seriously. I was one of the harshest critics of FC as it came out month to month, and I swear-- this is really great. The execution is much more effective in a single, continuous volume, rather than serialized sporadically over nine months.

  • June 18, 2009, 9:34 a.m. CST

    WHOA-- did you just call Winnick a 'giant'?

    by Laserhead

    What the fucking fuck-fuck is that supposed to mean?

  • June 18, 2009, 9:44 a.m. CST

    Wow...

    by Mr.FTW

    This has been by far the most civilized talk back I've seen on this column in a while.

  • June 18, 2009, 9:50 a.m. CST

    Buck R sounds interesting

    by BizarroJerry

    But, are you perhaps over-stating the influence of the Gil Gerard TV show. Remembering it nostalgically is not that same as dominating yer youth. Let me add, though, that I saw a rerun of the show the other day and, Erin Gray in her shiny jumpsuit... that's some good stuff.

  • June 18, 2009, 10:17 a.m. CST

    I think FC is a better read than COIE, period.

    by Thalya

    I'm not sure I understand the need to have a 7-issue miniseries follow an action-Action-Action-ACTION-ACTION-ACTION!-ACTION!!!!!!!!!! format, issue by issue. Being a serial medium, yes, I understand that the ideal of the artform is to make each issue its own piece of goodness, something of a complete story unto itself, before regarding it as part of a larger whole. It's part of why I love "done-in-ones."<BR><BR>But following that template for a larger miniseries, as COIE and IC did, makes for crap storytelling in my opinion: both series had a bunch of random wouldn't-it-be-kewl? scenes but not too much connective tissue. The difference between those series is that with COIE, as Optimus mentions, DC committed to it and wasn't making LAST MINUTE REVISIONS IN THE MINI ITSELF, allowing Wolfman to follow-through on previous story points for a satisfying, operatic resolution.<BR><BR>I remember last year picking up FC #1 at WWP, sitting down to read it, and being quite satisfied with the initial build-up, as well as the ensuing slow build**. Just when you think things couldn't get much worse, they did, so that when Darkseid completely rose up at the end of #5 that moment had well-deserved impact that would've fallen flat otherwise. Morrison reaching for the stars, even if some felt the execution was lacking, was a true breath of fresh air, especially considering the mediocrity of most of DC's stable at the time it was released.<BR><BR>**No one would create comics of any value if they had to create based on the demands of such over-entitled fanboys, ye gods! DiDio bumbled yet again in overpromising, but the fanboys doth project too much over a 1-month total delay and a change in one top-notch artist for a few others, who were well-coordinated enough to each either handle different scenes or have those with the most similar styles sharing scenes.

  • June 18, 2009, 10:36 a.m. CST

    crisis on infinite earths

    by gooseud

    is nigh-unreadable in 2009. The over written cliche dialogue undoes all the admittedly awesome beats of the story. The Earth 2 Superman punching Anti-Monitor needed a simple, Eastwood in Unforgiven, "I'm sick of this shit" stare. Instead we get the groan inducing, "He felt a great rage rise in his breast as he stood to face down the unremitting pure evil of his foe" blah blah blah blah type stuff. Its the reason that honestly, I never read Buzz's "Collected Masterworks of ______" reviews and skipped them as much as I ever do the Kid (All due respect, Buzz). I cant read the dialogue to those old books, just cant get past it.

  • June 18, 2009, 10:44 a.m. CST

    Laserhead

    by Series7

    Yeah I realize that post was very bad. But 2 hours of hot chicks dancing got me laid last night, so I'm not worried about it. And just because Danny won't return your advances doesn't mean you gotta hate. And I don't think that admiting that I watch So you think you can takes away from any of the nerdyness that is comic books. Besides, read Bang! Tango, dancing has made its way to comics now anyway.

  • June 18, 2009, 11:01 a.m. CST

    COIE

    by optimous_douche

    I'll agree the dialogue today just doesn't fly, I was referring more to the execution.<p> The pay off and how it changes the DCU seemed more cohesive, just simply more important.<p> The death of Supergirl and Barry Allen had lasting effects.<p> This "Is Bruce Wayne dead or isn't he shit" is simply absurd.<p> I didn't hold COIE in my hands at the end and go, "what the fuck just happened, did the rubiks cube save the world or not, where is Bruce Wayne, there's a multi-verse, but no monitors??????"

  • June 18, 2009, 11:05 a.m. CST

    Goose/Doom

    by Joenathan

    He was shown in Old Man Logan and DIDN'T attack Wolverine and I think was Emma Frost's husband, so he was providing a haven for Mutants... in short... you and Millar are in agreement... HA!

  • June 18, 2009, 11:10 a.m. CST

    Lamer than your last post.

    by Laserhead

    Note the desperate attempt to justify watching that with the old, unprovable saw, "it got me laid." Sure thing, buddy. You know what gets me laid? Being awesome. <p>Maybe if you send Danny an FTD bouquet, you'll get his attention.

  • June 18, 2009, 11:11 a.m. CST

    Continentalop

    by Joenathan

    Doom's Master doesn't make it ou of this story, I bet. This is just a hidden history of Doom type reveal coupled with a reminder of just how bad ass Doom is because he's about to be front and center again when he nd Namor double cross Osborn... and there ain't nothing wrong with that!

  • June 18, 2009, 11:31 a.m. CST

    I'd love to sit in on the DC retreat

    by Joenathan

    I mean, how do you think they refer to FC? Those meetings must be ridiculously tense.

  • June 18, 2009, 11:37 a.m. CST

    How they refer to FC

    by Laserhead

    Beleaguered Writer: Um... remember that thing, all last year, that, um, happened?...Um, have we decided that that really happened yet? Or was it all a dream?<p>Didio: Eh, a little of both. I'll tell you in a couple weeks, after I attend this convention and find out what the audience wants us to write.

  • June 18, 2009, 11:48 a.m. CST

    Joe

    by gooseud

    Millar and I agree on several things. The awesomeosity of Doom being one of them. His ULT FF run was excellent. Millar isnt without talent, he can write big screen brain dead action with the best of them (I mean that as a compliment, FYI). He was born for the Ultimate line, where he can kill anyone he wants and not worry about little things like continuity or previously established character traits. He alse doesnt seem to try hard enough to suit my tastes, and he is best in small doses, over time of writing a title his returns seem to diminish as his limited bag of tricks runs out. And he wouldnt be my first choice to write the secret history of Doom, thats for damn sure, god help us on that.

  • June 18, 2009, 11:48 a.m. CST

    Well you seem to be knee deep

    by Series7

    In DC, all the cool kids are reading Marvel these days. DC sucks.

  • June 18, 2009, 11:53 a.m. CST

    So, am I the only one that loves DC right now?

    by Thrillho77

    I think Green Lantern and this Blackest Night stuff is just the cat's pajamas. Also, I really like this Batman stuff. They bungled his death, but I like everywhere that they are going in its aftermath!

  • June 18, 2009, 11:53 a.m. CST

    Actually

    by Series7

    What the fuck is an FTD bouquet? Is that some DC reference?

  • June 18, 2009, 11:56 a.m. CST

    Having said that

    by gooseud

    His Old MAn Logan finale was......adequate, I guess. The idea of a 178 year old Red Skull being able to hang with Logan for even a split second is ludicrous, as is the fact the Logan seems to be aging at the same rate as Hawkeye did, even though Logan.....doesnt age at the same rate Hawkeye does (ooooops). Having said that, it was adequate and paid off at the end the way everyone wanted it to.

  • June 18, 2009, 11:58 a.m. CST

    DC doesnt suck

    by gooseud

    as long as they keep publishing Secret Six. Anytime any Marvel Zombie starts going off about how DC blows, just silently hold up that book and its like "OH.....right".

  • June 18, 2009, 11:59 a.m. CST

    Does DC even have retreats?

    by Thalya

    Isn't that more a Marvel thing unless it's a specific project? The way the company is right now at that, it probably wouldn't be a good thing to get everyone in a room together with DiDio. Or, on second thought..<BR><BR>And Series7, all the "cool" kids have always read Marvel. That's their schtick.

  • June 18, 2009, noon CST

    AS time goes on

    by gooseud

    an with benefit of hindsight, it becomes clearer and clearer that, as Goose has been saying for years, Identity Crisis for the first 6 issues was indeed friggin awesome. I've been the lone voice in the wilderness on that one for a while, but every botched event that goes by, my team gets a little bigger.

  • June 18, 2009, 12:03 p.m. CST

    Laserhead -- I do watch So You Think You Can Dance.

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    Does that make me homosexual? I watch a dance show, so now I suck dick, eh? What are we in the 3rd fucking grade?<p>Thats like me pointing out the fact that you read funny books so you must enjoy the thought of fucking a child in his car seat. <p>Fuck off with this simple minded bullshit, you dull unoriginal twat. <p>Good day.

  • June 18, 2009, 12:06 p.m. CST

    Silly wabbit, Goose

    by Joenathan

    Old Man Logan isn't over, don't try to spread misinformation just cause you're mad that you accidentally agreed with Millar...

  • June 18, 2009, 12:09 p.m. CST

    Hey Zar

    by Series7

    just posted something in the wrong TB again. At least this time it was just the word Krull. Not as bad.

  • June 18, 2009, 12:10 p.m. CST

    Can I join your team, Goose?

    by Thalya

    So long as, y'know, you aren't piloting Navy fighter jets?

  • June 18, 2009, 12:11 p.m. CST

    Secret Six

    by Series7

    Yeah I've been meaning to pick that up. But it seems like the only one that gets away from DC's continuty at all.

  • June 18, 2009, 12:14 p.m. CST

    The cover for the next Old Man Logan

    by Series7

    Gives away the whole fucking thing.

  • June 18, 2009, 12:30 p.m. CST

    Who said you suck dick you freak?

    by Laserhead

    Have you come to haunt this talkback with your cunt-mouth? What happened, did Series 7 say, Danny, Danny, somebody's talking about you!<p>Read the post, you felching shit-stain. I was ribbing Series 7 about posting here, and now, what, you've got to high-tail it over to toss some insults? Christ, Dickblood, I understand that posting on Aint-It-Cool-News represents the high-water mark in your life's achievement, but nobody really cares if you watch Dancing with the Stars.<p>So eat 7's taint and fuck off to whatever talkback you're currently using as the only gateway for attention you'll ever have. Douche.

  • June 18, 2009, 12:31 p.m. CST

    What's that?

    by Joenathan

    Does it show him cuttin' somebody?<br><br>Fucking spoilers.

  • June 18, 2009, 12:32 p.m. CST

    And Series 7

    by Laserhead

    Did you really just run to find DannyGloversDickBlood and say, "Help, Help Danny! Somebody's making it sound like I'm gay for you!"<p>You should be ashamed. But obviously you have a higher shame threshold than most.

  • June 18, 2009, 12:32 p.m. CST

    Huh..lookee there...

    by Thalya

    Robinson and Bagley on JLA in October.

  • June 18, 2009, 12:33 p.m. CST

    The cover of old man

    by Series7

    Shows all of Hulks family dead with Wolverine standing over them in front of a cave with the Hulk trying to bust out of the cave like he's stuck. How'd he get in there in the first place?

  • June 18, 2009, 12:34 p.m. CST

    Laserhead

    by Series7

    It was So You Think You Can Dance, not Dancing with the Stars. Don't pretend like you don't know the difference.

  • June 18, 2009, 12:37 p.m. CST

    Laserhead -- fuck you.

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    That is all.

  • June 18, 2009, 12:37 p.m. CST

    Series7

    by Joenathan

    He went in through the backdoor. Hulk love backdoor

  • June 18, 2009, 12:39 p.m. CST

    Danny, just relax

    by Laserhead

    Take a deep breath, and calm down. He'll call back.<p>And if he doesn't call back, it means he's just not that into you? And you know what? That's fine. Plenty of fish in the sea. Chin up, buddy.

  • June 18, 2009, 12:40 p.m. CST

    Did Thalya.........

    by gooseud

    just hit on me? Dude i think I just got a quarter chub.........wait, Thalya's a chick, right? What if Thalya actually isnt a chick and I just got a quarter chub, does that mean I'm actually gay? Homer, consult STAT!!

  • June 18, 2009, 12:44 p.m. CST

    Winnick a 'giant'?

    by cookylamoo

    No. But Didio treats him like one.

  • June 18, 2009, 12:44 p.m. CST

    ROFL OML's cover gives it away?!?!

    by gooseud

    NO! Say it isnt so!! That's like spoiling the ending of Usual Suspects or Fight Club there Wait, I'm gonna guess.....he kills the Hulk gang? Do I need a spoiler warning there?

  • June 18, 2009, 12:44 p.m. CST

    Laserhead -- ok I'm calm now....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    ....and you got what you've been begging for. I mentioned your name in a post!! I directly communicated with you! Now you can tell all your buddies at the comic shop next time you're cruisin' for 9 year olds!!<p>YES!!

  • June 18, 2009, 12:46 p.m. CST

    Winnick is a giant

    by gooseud

    a giant black hole of suck that destroys anything that is awesome within its cold, black interior.

  • June 18, 2009, 12:48 p.m. CST

    Its not so much of a spolier

    by Series7

    Just lame. I mean what if they put the death of Red Skull on the cover of the last issue? I mean we knew he would do it, just hoping it would be something cooler.

  • June 18, 2009, 12:50 p.m. CST

    Series7 -- I'll talk to you later.

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    Give me a call around 8 Pacific Time, thats when my girl goes to night class..... you fucking little flirt.

  • June 18, 2009, 12:51 p.m. CST

    Ok

    by Series7

    Poopems! We can talk and debate about who we thought should've gotten voted off.

  • June 18, 2009, 12:51 p.m. CST

    Yeesh, Danny

    by Laserhead

    Look, life's full of disappointments. And whatever you thought was or wasn't going to happen at that glory hole in the men's bathroom under the overpass last night... well, that's not what happened. And you don't need to carry this anger around with you. If you're meant to make a special connection, it'll happen. If not, so be it. You've always got the accomplishment of your AICN posts, which nobody can take away from you. Let those doctors and lawyers and writers have their money and fancy cars. You got yours.<p>Remember, 'When God closes one door, he opens another.' Even if that door's to the men's room.

  • June 18, 2009, 12:54 p.m. CST

    I prefer the quote:

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    "Nobody can go back and make a new start. Anyone can start from now and make a new ending,"

  • June 18, 2009, 12:57 p.m. CST

    that wasn't funny.

    by Series7

    I don't think it even made sense.

  • June 18, 2009, 1:17 p.m. CST

    Series7/Goose

    by Joenathan

    But hey, what if its intentionally misleading... What if they're all just sleeping?

  • June 18, 2009, 1:18 p.m. CST

    Also

    by Joenathan

    yes, Goose. You are now gay, thats how it happens. First you mistake a guy for a girl, next thing you know... throw pillows everywhere.

  • ..Weather Wiz---erk, Calcul.. augh, the nanites are messing with me again. Do you want tofurkey? I have to go kayak before the book deal.<BR><BR><BR>Seriously, I heart Identity Crisis for the most part too. THAT club. :)

  • June 18, 2009, 1:20 p.m. CST

    Robinson on JLA

    by Laserhead

    Has Robinson written a single decent thing since he came back from writing terrible film scripts in Hollywood? All his modern work is really, really awful right now. At least what I've seen of it.

  • June 18, 2009, 1:20 p.m. CST

    m = my lord and master..

    by Thalya

    Stupid truncated subjects.

  • June 18, 2009, 1:21 p.m. CST

    Spoke too soon

    by Mr.FTW

    I guess I jinxed the talk back by mentioning the civility this time around, sorry to everyone that wanted to read and talk about comics.

  • June 18, 2009, 1:24 p.m. CST

    Not your fault FTW

    by Laserhead

    It's still civil. Except for one very, very confused young man.

  • June 18, 2009, 1:25 p.m. CST

    Joenathan

    by Series7

    maybe Logan is setting up a Romeo and Julliett Type ending.

  • June 18, 2009, 1:26 p.m. CST

    Yeah Mr.FTW

    by Series7

    Laserhead still isn't sure if he should let his parents know about his rollerblading hobby.

  • June 18, 2009, 1:28 p.m. CST

    Series7

    by Joenathan

    I bet it ends in a dance number, Bollywood style!

  • June 18, 2009, 1:30 p.m. CST

    Joenathan

    by Series7

    We don't talk about dancing around here.

  • June 18, 2009, 1:32 p.m. CST

    Its Millar

    by Series7

    Its gonna be a killing spree ending, not a walking off into the sunset ending like Ultimate Hulk Vs. Wolverine. Maybe Hulk will turn out to be Logan's father.

  • June 18, 2009, 1:34 p.m. CST

    Oh they already know all about it

    by Laserhead

    What they're unclear on is why anyone would waste their precious time on earth watching amateur dancing competitions.<p>Just kidding! My parents are dead.

  • June 18, 2009, 1:51 p.m. CST

    James Robinson

    by gooseud

    has lost the ability to write. I've mentioned this in the talkbacks before, but he had one good story in him: Starman. Thats it. Its his greatest accomplishment and magnum opus. Unfortunately, its pretty much all he had in the tabk. He left Starman to go to Hollywood scriptwriting due to "burnout"....AKA he was out of ideas. He literally hasnt written anything of value since the day he left Starman. Bizarre and highly dissapointing.

  • June 18, 2009, 1:53 p.m. CST

    Thalya

    by gooseud

    I'll have Barry White, chocolate covered strawberries, some silk sheets, and the Identity Crisis TBs waiting for you.

  • June 18, 2009, 2 p.m. CST

    Robinson

    by Laserhead

    I agree Goose. I hadn't read any of his new stuff till fairly recently. I've only checked out his Superman work but its all been really bad. Not even 'kinda bad.' Even his new afterwards in the Starman Omnibuses read sort of badly; they have an really inflated sense of accomplishment and are a bit reproachful and judgmental toward other people in the business. Plus-- how can you so badly fuck-up a film adaptation of League of Extraordinary Gentlemen? All you have to do is just transcribe those first six issues and maybe combine some scenes.

  • June 18, 2009, 2:02 p.m. CST

    Robinson wrote one other good comic besides STARMAN:

    by SleazyG.

    The fun, upbeat, all-ages LEAVE IT TO CHANCE. It was a great little book, and deserved a much bigger audience. But yeah, that seems to be where it ended. How well he does with the upcoming JLA miniseries should be an indicator of how he'll do on the main title--unless it's now been rolled *into8 the main title. I should check on that.

  • June 18, 2009, 2:10 p.m. CST

    The state of DC

    by Mr.FTW

    It might be in shambles right now but here's hoping Johns can fix a lot of it with Blackedt Night.<p> Here's hoping he can do without getting overloaded or burned out first too.

  • June 18, 2009, 2:15 p.m. CST

    Ooh, goodies! You're so thoughtful! Thanks Goose!

    by Thalya

    Now scamper along and get me some Asti while I settle in for "private time" with my main man Noah Kuttler here.. You can shut the door on your way out both times.

  • June 18, 2009, 2:16 p.m. CST

    Series7

    by Joenathan

    Here's what actually happens. The baby you saw nursing in the first issue, is the Hulk from the future in Millar's FF run. Logan wipes out the whole clan, except the baby, who he then raises as his own, eventually adopting the Hooded Man persona for the day he travels back in time to fight the FF and save the future.

  • June 18, 2009, 2:17 p.m. CST

    James Robinson

    by steverodgers

    Also wrote the GOLDEN AGE - A DC Elseworlds comic that is pretty good and worth tracking down.

  • June 18, 2009, 2:19 p.m. CST

    Laserhead/Robinson

    by Joenathan

    At first I assumed it was two different people, but nope... the LoEG film goes beyond terrible and is the prime example of: Why bother paying for the rights at all, if you're not interested in the actual story?

  • June 18, 2009, 2:20 p.m. CST

    Golden Age is great

    by Laserhead

    Paul Smith's art is awesome, and the original Manhunter got some good screen time.

  • June 18, 2009, 2:22 p.m. CST

    Golden Age is good

    by Joenathan

    Leave it to Chance.. meh... depends on your taste. Personally, I never enjoyed Archie or Nancy Drew or Little Lulu, so...

  • June 18, 2009, 2:23 p.m. CST

    The Twelve

    by Joenathan

    I was hoping for, basically, a longer Golden Age. Unfortuantly, all I got was "longer"<br><Br>Screw you, JMS.

  • June 18, 2009, 2:26 p.m. CST

    Joen Carrie Bucky

    by steverodgers

    Doesn't do much in Cap 600, pretty much what you saw in the preview that they had up is what you get. Do you think Bru is trying to prove that he is the greatest comic-book writer in the universe by making Heroes Reborn cool? "Watch me turn this poop sandwich into a steak-um!”

  • June 18, 2009, 2:31 p.m. CST

    why can't we just kill off

    by Series7

    Superheroes for good.

  • June 18, 2009, 2:34 p.m. CST

    The Twelve

    by steverodgers

    Seriously with that book. It's like he forgot he was writing it. He's going to wake up in 2040 and suddenly be like, "shit, I gotta get that TWELVE script in!"

  • June 18, 2009, 2:36 p.m. CST

    Twelve

    by Laserhead

    Does JMS even maintain a pretense of intending to finish this any more? I thought that since he was moving over to the Archie characters for DC, he'd just decided to scrap the Twelve, and nobody's coming out and saying it.

  • June 18, 2009, 2:42 p.m. CST

    RE: The Twelve

    by Thalya

    I'm trying to remember, back when they were both coming out at the same time, was there a general consensus on which book was better - The Twelve or Project Superpowers?

  • June 18, 2009, 2:42 p.m. CST

    That would be a feat

    by Joenathan

    Imagine if he were able to make people refer to heroes Reborn in a positive way? Bucky Carrie is awesome. SHE WAS CREATED BY LIEFELD! ITS THE END OF THE WORLD!

  • June 18, 2009, 2:45 p.m. CST

    The consensus

    by Joenathan

    Project Superpowers blows. The Twelve used to not blow, but know it blows as well.<br><Br>DC and Marvel should start putting fines in their contracts for failure to deliver within an alloted time frame.

  • June 18, 2009, 2:50 p.m. CST

    Bru: Bucky Carrie

    by steverodgers

    It would be like the ultimate feat. Bigger then bringing back regular Bucky. I'm a tad concerned. It could turn into his Waterloo…

  • June 18, 2009, 2:57 p.m. CST

    Actually, "Firearm" by Robinson was very good.

    by cookylamoo

    I've got the whole Malibu Comics series PLUS the VHS taped episode. Envy me.

  • June 18, 2009, 2:57 p.m. CST

    The Twelve is up

    by Series7

    For a couple of Eisners, maybe if he wins he'll finish it.

  • June 18, 2009, 3:06 p.m. CST

    Firearm

    by steverodgers

  • June 18, 2009, 3:07 p.m. CST

    Firearm

    by steverodgers

    Came with a VHS tape? Cooky tell us more. Sounds awesome!

  • June 18, 2009, 3:13 p.m. CST

    I'm finished with the Twelve

    by Joenathan

    Even if he finishes it, I'm not buying it. This is what JMS does. He is incapable of finishing a project on time and well done. He is all show and no go. HACK!

  • June 18, 2009, 3:17 p.m. CST

    Firearm?

    by Joenathan

    I remember Harcase and the one about the random people on the Trolley who all got powers (which is still a good idea for a series, even if this one was poorly done), but Firearm? It sounds so familiar. Ah... Malibu... there used to be so many d-list superhero universes.

  • June 18, 2009, 3:19 p.m. CST

    The curse of Leifeld

    by Joenathan

    Is Bru fu stronger than the awesome sucking power of the Leifeld? You're right, Steve, this is a titanic battle in the making, with the fate of Bucky Carrie, nay, the entire extended Captain America cast, hanging in the balance.

  • June 18, 2009, 3:27 p.m. CST

    Fines...

    by Mr.FTW

    I agree, the day and age of delays shouldn't exist anymore. If you're an artist or a writer it's their job to churn out product. Production delays shouldn't be tolerated.

  • June 18, 2009, 3:29 p.m. CST

    Robinson's Golden Age

    by Continentalop

    Was one of the few comics in the modern age to present the Ultra-Humanite as a truly dangerous villain (the other being Generations). <p> I love the white ape Ultra, but that image just made people think he can't be all evil. Just look at his golden age appearances people - one of the evilest villains ever.

  • June 18, 2009, 3:31 p.m. CST

    That is why I don't like long arcs Joe

    by Continentalop

    Unless you have proven you are a reliable writer who makes deadlines (Bru for example), all comic book stories should be three story arcs max. And this especially goes for Hollywood guys like Smith and JSM who are easily distracted.

  • June 18, 2009, 3:54 p.m. CST

    3 story arcs

    by Joenathan

    Thats like nine issues! JMS couldn't even do tht.

  • June 18, 2009, 3:55 p.m. CST

    Bru/Leifeld

    by steverodgers

    Exactly. It's the story of the year! Talk about nerves of steel. Is it confidence or hubris? He has thrown down the gauntlet, if he pulls it off he should get like a big WWF Championship belt to wear around the bullpen. I’m thinking that’s why Cap has been slow of late, he has been steeling himself for the ultimate comic book writing battle of his life! He’s Captain America and Leifeld/Heroes Reborn Bucky is Thanos. Go Bru go!

  • June 18, 2009, 3:58 p.m. CST

    Bendis is reliable

    by Joenathan

    The guys a comic book writing machine... except for powers, but I can understand sacrificing your own stuff for the paid work you agreed to do.

  • June 18, 2009, 3:59 p.m. CST

    Firearm WAS good

    by gooseud

    forgot that one, but yeah, Firearm was quality, which shouldnt be surprising as Robinson USED to be a quality writer. Whoever said his Starman Omnibus afterwards are snotty is correct, I actually found his afterward for Vol. 2 fascinating, as he actually rips Tony Harris in a kind of indirect, distant way. Which is of course ridiculous, as Tony Harris is the tits and him leaving after the 1st six issues is what has kept Walking Dead from achieving iconic status. I dont really care about The Twelve, I was always in the distinct minority that found it horrible overrated even at the time. Once oyu figure out the hook (heroes adjusting to modern times), I found it sort of meh. Very competent, and I would have finished it up if he had bothered putting it out, but I'm not heartbroken it died, whatever. Aside from general consternation that you could just up and walk away midstream from a 12 issue miniseries. DUDE, ITS A MINISERIES!! YOU CANT FINISH TWELVE GODDAMN ISSUES???

  • June 18, 2009, 4 p.m. CST

    The one thing in Bru's favor

    by Joenathan

    I couldn't tell you anything about Bucky Carrie, or her personality, for the life of me... maybe Bru just picked out the youngest, limping deer from the Liefeld herd?

  • June 18, 2009, 4:03 p.m. CST

    Cap actually......

    by gooseud

    HAS been slow of late. Really slow actually. I just tend to hold off criticism a bit as Bru has built up alot of equity with me. Also, I also get the sense of Bru holding back and sandbagging a bit. Clearly, BuckyCap is a quality character and Bru is the bee's knees, so its not the topic or the talent slowing things down, it seems more of a conscious decision to slow it down a tad. I will say this, if Bru pulls this off, does he become the undisputed best writer in comics? Better then BKV, Morrison, and Johns? Maybe he knows the only way to take the crown from BKV is to pull off something so outrageous and impossible that no one could ever deny him.

  • June 18, 2009, 4:04 p.m. CST

    Goose

    by Joenathan

    He made it to eight, and he ouldn't finish. whattadick.

  • June 18, 2009, 4:04 p.m. CST

    Lets ask Joe

    by gooseud

    Lets hear it: IS Bru the best writer alive if he can somehow pull this off?

  • June 18, 2009, 4:06 p.m. CST

    Never really dug The Twelve either

    by Continentalop

    I would have preferred if they stayed in the Golden Age - I love a good GA story (Roy Thomas' All-Star Squadron was one of my first comics). <p> I think I would have found it more interesting if they weren't adjusting to the modern era but life after WWII. Publishing wise, it was a period where most super-hero comics died; comic book continuity wise, it was an era where they didn't have a clear enemy like the Nazis anymore.

  • June 18, 2009, 4:07 p.m. CST

    Cap slow?

    by Joenathan

    A little, I have noticed it, not as much as I do with Daredevil of late, but enough. If he makes Bucky Carrie cool, he easily tops BVK and Johns, but I don't know about Morrison... I mean, Grant did take out Darkseid with Connor Hawke Green Arrow and the Atom, after all...

  • June 18, 2009, 4:09 p.m. CST

    Continentalop

    by Joenathan

    I am with you. I'd love a good WWII superhero comic, both at home and "over there" in dirty dozen/band of brothers type missions and then life afterwards. Sounds awesome. Life after WWII gave birth to noir, I'd love to see someone good tackle that time period

  • June 18, 2009, 4:14 p.m. CST

    Plus Joe

    by Continentalop

    You have such a long list of Timely characters who have basically been forgotten. Here you could actually KILL - yes KILL - characters pretty easily and permanently, making the danger level much higher. <p> Does anyone really think that Moon Man, Captain Terror or original Falcon are to big not to be killed? No one is safe. <p> Marvel, make this happen.

  • June 18, 2009, 4:17 p.m. CST

    And forgot to mention Bru needs to write it

    by Continentalop

  • June 18, 2009, 4:23 p.m. CST

    He is doing the Cap: the truth series

    by Joenathan

    or whatever its called. That ought to be interesting.

  • June 18, 2009, 4:26 p.m. CST

    Good Point

    by steverodgers

    I don't remember a thing about Bucky Carrie either. But when I saw her again, a cold shiver went down my spine. Like something awful had happened and I blocked it out...even those most limping Liefeld deer has evil powers that we can barely comprehend.

  • June 18, 2009, 4:34 p.m. CST

    Bru

    by steverodgers

    I think to get the undisputed comic book writing crown he would also need to be given and pull off a big company-wide crossover mini-series book. He hasn't done that yet. Like if Marvel gave him Secret Wars III and he knocked it out of the park. In fact they should do that right now.

  • June 18, 2009, 4:43 p.m. CST

    Thats true

    by Joenathan

    Bru has yet to take center stage in Marvel, even though Cap and Daredevil are awesome, the books themselves hover around the edges of the Marvel Universe. Maybe that will change with Cap though, and Bru will be more marquee, but that has to happen before he does an Event and if he can make Bucky Carrie cool (was that thunder...?) AND can pull off an Event that doesn't fizzle alittle at the end... then... well then... he's at least within spitting distance of Morrison for best ever

  • June 18, 2009, 5:55 p.m. CST

    Gooseud-- the Starman Omnibus Afterword

    by Laserhead

    Yeah... it's off-putting, right?! Robinson is actually passively-aggressively belligerent to Tony Harris, and anyone who doubted his superstardom as a writer. Robinson writes those afterwords like he's Stanley Kubrick giving a career retrospective! Shit, man, at least PRETEND to be good-natured and humble, for the sake of posterity.

  • June 18, 2009, 5:58 p.m. CST

    Marvel SHOULD give Bru Secret Wars III

    by Laserhead

    And it should wrap up the final days of Dark Reign. I would love that.<p>Meanwhile, I look over at DC, and their poor writers are wondering which of their characters are still alive to play with... and no one can answer them.

  • June 18, 2009, 6:02 p.m. CST

    Just saw the

    by Series7

    Trailer for A Perfect Gateway, and got to say. Any movie with NIN in the trailer has to be good.

  • June 18, 2009, 6:03 p.m. CST

    Fuck me

    by Series7

    Did it again. At least this time I can say I was drinking.

  • June 18, 2009, 6:13 p.m. CST

    Series

    by Continentalop

    Looks like you picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue.

  • June 18, 2009, 6:15 p.m. CST

    I used to drink during the day

    by Laserhead

    And post at the same time. Then I stopped.<p>Posting while I was drinking in the middle of the day, I mean.

  • June 18, 2009, 6:30 p.m. CST

    Starman omnibus afterword

    by gooseud

    Yeah I kept waiting for Robinson to back off of Tony Harris a little, but instead he just was kind of like "And......we still dont talk at all, and will probably never work together again. The End." Bizarre, I mean even if its true, why write it? Thats, in hindsight, one of the flaws of Starman: Robinson's arrogance creeping through in the writing. I didnt notice at the time, because any arrogance was justified, as that was far and away one of the best comics of the 90's (and still really hasnt been duplicated in its tone and quirky oddness, it really does stand alone in style, before or since). MAke no mistake, Starman was a crowning comics achievement, the problem is Robinson is fully aware of it, and makes sure everyone around him knows too.

  • June 18, 2009, 6:32 p.m. CST

    Especially since

    by gooseud

    Tony Harris is knocking it out of the fuckin park on Ex Machina and is one of the most respected artists in comics and Robinson is washed up burnt toast with nothing to show for the 10 years since Starman, which has to sting just a bit. Hey James, a little humility might be in order since the guy you are passive-aggresively ripping is stilla vital force in the industry, ya think?

  • June 18, 2009, 6:35 p.m. CST

    I dont think Bru can write......

    by gooseud

    team books, hence no huge crossovers. Incognito, Cap, DD, what do they have in common? And his Xmen work was solid, but in my opinion not on a par with the current Cap run....but then again, what is? We are talking about one of the seminal runs of the last 15 years, so perhaps I'm being too harsh. Its not like X men sucked.

  • June 18, 2009, 6:39 p.m. CST

    I'm holding out hope for Robinson

    by bottleimp

    His Captain America one-shot from a couple months ago was very well-done, so I'm hoping that he can still put out good work when it comes time for the new Justice League series. I haven't read the STARMAN omnibus or seen the afterword you guys are talking about-- I figured since I own the whole series anyways, I didn't need to get it. Can anybody say exactly what Robinson says about Harris? Seeing as how Harris' artwork set STARMAN above the bar visually as Robinson's writing did literally, I would think that any personal squabbles or disagreements would dismissed in the face of what they accomplished. Of course, when one is the scribe of such gems as THE LEAGUE OF EXTRAORDINARY GENTLEMEN screenplay, I suppose one's ego can be excused.

  • June 18, 2009, 6:48 p.m. CST

    Series....

    by BangoSkank

    Accidentally posting about a Milla Jovovich movie is far better than accidentally posting about "If you think you can Dance".... An M.J. movie might not get you laid, but at least you can respect yourself in the morning.

  • June 18, 2009, 6:51 p.m. CST

    Bru crossover/epic

    by Continentalop

    I actually think he could do a pretty good mega-event with many players. But for some reason I see it more in the vein of the Korvac Saga or Stern's Masters of Evil IV (yes, both of those sagas were in a single title - the Avengers -but I mean I could see him pulling of something in a similar tone but on a wider scope).

  • June 18, 2009, 6:53 p.m. CST

    BangoSkank

    by Continentalop

    We are all grown men on a forum discussing comics. I don't think any of us can toss stones at someone else for his taste and talk about respecting ourselves in the morning.

  • June 18, 2009, 7:54 p.m. CST

    Bottleimp

    by Laserhead

    You really have to read Robinson's afterwords. It's nothing outright; it's in the whole tone and flavor of the pieces; he's not outright insulting, but very, very back-handed with his compliments, and seems to be remonstrating anyone who doubted he was a genius in the early 90s. The whole thing, at least in vol. 1&2, is very arrogant, and transparent in its vanities and grudges. Really weird.

  • June 18, 2009, 8:20 p.m. CST

    Comic Book Writer Championship

    by steverodgers

    What if say Marvel (also could be DC) gives 5 teams (Millar/Hitch, Bendis/JRJR, Bru/Epting, Johns/Someone, Morrison/someone, BKV/someone - you get the idea) the same concept - like SECRET WARS III, 12 issues, self contained event – each team then simultaneously, independent of each other puts out the comic, so you have 5 different SECRET WAR III’s going on for a year. Then at the end the fans vote for which is the best, and that one stays in continuity, and the writer wins the Comic Book Writer Championship Belt that year (huge belt they get to wear around). Even if people voted for the story that wasn’t your favorite – you would still have 12 issues of a kick-ass comic. How do you lose? I would buy everyone single one… we would be debating up and down the talkbacks which is better, it would be awesome. They could crown the winner at San Diego, and announce the next concept and teams… so next year is CONTEST of CHAMPIONS, or MASTERS of EVIL, and they announce Gaiman/Mazzucchelli, Loeb/Leifeld, Busiek/Anderson etc.. it would be fantastic. I'm giddy just thinking about it. Marvel/DC make it happen!

  • June 18, 2009, 8:22 p.m. CST

    Bottleimp

    by gooseud

    Basically, in so many words, Robinson says "I know you would expect me and Tony to be friends, but we really arent and never were. In addition, we had heated disagreements all the time over the direction the book should take. I know people said the book suffered in quality when Tony left halfway through, but I dont think so, so everyone is wrong. We also probably wont work together ever again." It doesnt read as harsh as I'm making it sound, its more subtle in its back handed compliments and over-sensitive ego, but thats pretty much the gist. Its all in the tone. Its really required reading for any fan of the title or its creators, its truly bizarre in its complete tone-deaf arrogance. I'm not really doing it justice here (anyone who knows Starman knows Robinson is a wordy guy and isn't easily condensed or summarized). Picture an afterword written by Robinson in the character of the Shade, as if the Shade was a real person and had written a comic called Starman. That's the best I can do for a summary, ask Laserhead if he thinks I'm getting this right.

  • June 18, 2009, 8:24 p.m. CST

    Steverodgers

    by gooseud

    The deciding factor would be who gets use of Quitely. I'm being completely serious.

  • June 18, 2009, 8:51 p.m. CST

    goose

    by steverodgers

    Absolutely and if they decided to throw their hats in the ring the Quitely/Morrison team would be one of the odds on favorites to win. The Loeb/liefeld team would be the dark horses of course and the JMS team would get about 4 issues in and just stop.

  • June 18, 2009, 8:55 p.m. CST

    12 issues? In one year? With some of those pairings?

    by Thalya

    Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

  • June 18, 2009, 9:22 p.m. CST

    BKV/Tony Harris

    by gooseud

    would be 1A to Morrison/Quitely's 1. Does Morrison get Quitely, or does Ellis? It would all depend on the character, for example I dont think Morrison could write DD effectively, Quitely or no. Brubaker/Epting couldn't write Spider-Man. Millar/Hitch couldnt write any of the bright, shiny DC titles like Flash or Green Lantern, and Millar is the all time worst Superman writer in recorded history (Batman, thats a different story). Character assignment is everything.

  • June 18, 2009, 9:44 p.m. CST

    Shame about Robinson's ego, but I gotta say...

    by bottleimp

    ... even though Harris really set the standard for the visual tone of STARMAN, Peter Snejbjerg did a bang-up job when he took over the art chores, especially once he was inking as well as pencilling. So I've got to agree with Robinson that the artwork in the series, aside from a few unfortunate fill-in issues, never suffered after Harris' departure.

  • June 18, 2009, 9:56 p.m. CST

    Rules of Comic Book Championship

    by Continentalop

    1) All teams will start work on the same date and have the same deadlines. <p> 2) All teams will be required to use the same characters. List of characters will be established by popular vote amongst fans. <p> 3) All teams will start out with the same basic premise. <p> 4) Any team failing to meet a deadline will be disqualified (instantly eliminating team JMS). 5) Each teams series will be self contained and be told in just twelve 22-page issues. <p> 6) At the end of each teams series, fans will vote for which one is the best. <p> 7) The winning series will be included in comic continuity, the losers banished to alternate timelines or parallel earths (What ifs? & Elseworlds). <p> 8) The winner will be allowed to wear the Comic Book Championship Belt until such time as he is defeated.

  • June 18, 2009, 10:10 p.m. CST

    Championships

    by Series7

    I don't think they should use the same characters, I think each team has to create a whole new super and fit them into what ever universe.

  • June 18, 2009, 11:25 p.m. CST

    An @$$hole Will Be Assigned To Each Duo

    by Buzz Maverik

    Screen gets wavey.<p>INT. BENDIS STUDY -- DAY Grimacing, Bendis sits at his word processor. Ambush Bug paces behind him.<p>AMBUSH BUG: "Blah, blah, blah. ZZZZZ. ZZZZZ. Blah, blah, blah."<p>BENDIS:"Grrrr."<p>AMBUSH BUG:"Good idea. Mix it up a little."

  • June 18, 2009, 11:29 p.m. CST

    INT. MARK MILLAR'S STUDY -- NIGHT

    by Buzz Maverik

    BUZZ MAVERIK:"No, see, when you do that, I can see you writing. I mean, I'm here in Scotland or Ireland or wherever we are and I can actually see you typing, but if I was at home reading your comic, I could see you typing and saying how bloody clever you are. Say, if we're in Ireland, let's head to a pub and drink a couple of hundred pints of Guiness. I really like Black and Tans myself. Are we in Scotland? I can never tell you guys apart. Some people have that trouble with Chinese and Japanese people, but with them I have no trouble. It's you UK guys that confuse me. Do you have any pot?"

  • June 19, 2009, 1:31 a.m. CST

    Respect

    by proper

    I used to get Roy of the Rovers delivered weekly to my door when I was a kid.I still remember Melchester losing because everybody went upfront to try to score a goal for Roy who'd come back from being shot with only "Blackie" [Blimey that's old skool ;0] Gray being the only one with his football head on in defence..The one torrent I could never find,I'm buying this one,the circle is complete.Good to see that one here,good work fellas :>

  • June 19, 2009, 5 a.m. CST

    The Comic Book -- CONTEST OF CHAMPIONS!

    by V. von Doom

    steverodgers, that has got to be the best idea since the Olympics. Some of the writers would win purely by being on deadline. (Really, has Johns ever missed a deadline that wasn't the artist's fault?) Others would probably pull some wild concept out of their brains at the last minute and wow the cheering crowds (hello, Morrison!). And then we all get on the Internet and vote for the winning story in which Jason Todd dies again/doesn't die/becomes the Batman/is erased from continuity/becomes a Marvel Zombie ... I'm trying to stifle giggles just thinking about the weirdness that would ensue if this ever came to pass.

  • June 19, 2009, 6:28 a.m. CST

    Robinson/Claremont/JMS

    by optimous_douche

    Robinson and Claremont -- oh, how the mighty have fallen. Robinson's Superman had glimmers of hope in some panels and then others that just sucked. Science Police...Really...fucking science police. Claremont just needs to stop now, this resurrection of X-Men is a big waste of "who cares" paper.<p> I am fucking pissed about The Twelve. It trounced Superpowers (although I did like the first issue).

  • June 19, 2009, 6:45 a.m. CST

    Agreed Optimous.

    by BangoSkank

    I just got around to reading X-Men Forever... I'm a huge X-men fan, but that book just made me cringe. Why the fuck would anyone want to revisit the early 90's? Why? Much less, every two weeks? I canceled my online subscription BEFORE looking at any porn this morning, that's how bad it was.

  • June 19, 2009, 6:50 a.m. CST

    And I never even bothered with The Twelve...

    by BangoSkank

    despite the love it was getting here. I'm done with JMS, voting with my checkbook, or however that adage goes. I refuse to support his work anymore... Or if I were to, strictly in collected form.

  • June 19, 2009, 7:23 a.m. CST

    Oh, so they have to create their OWN characters

    by gooseud

    Hmmm that changes things....who has shown ability to create from scratch? Bru has Incognito and all his noir books, Millar has Kick-Ass, Morrison has 7 million things, BKV has Ex Machina and Y, Johns has......hmmm, what DOES Johns have? Well if we are talking about creating something cool from scratch, then 3 names just jumped into the fray that have shown distinct ability to create something cool (As opposed to ability to write an existiting character, which is its own set of trickiness): Ellis, Kirkman, and......gulp......Garth Ennis.

  • June 19, 2009, 8:47 a.m. CST

    Comic Writing Championship

    by Laserhead

    Isn't all comic-writing everywhere part of the eternal, universal comic writing championship?<p> Right now Alan Moore, Jack Kirby, and Grant Morrison are in the lead.

  • June 19, 2009, 10:20 a.m. CST

    CBC

    by steverodgers

    Thanks Doom. I hope it does come to pass. Although a lot of the fun is debating the rules, teams, and how it would work out. But if it ever did come to pass... can you imagine. So awesome. It would be huge.

  • June 19, 2009, 10:32 a.m. CST

    Continentalop/CBC Rules

    by steverodgers

    Maybe the fans vote on a 1-900 number, or it cost a dollar to text, and the winner not only gets the title and totally awesome belts, but they get the cash, or it goes to their favorite charity etc... ups the ante!

  • June 19, 2009, 10:50 a.m. CST

    Thats the way to go, Bango

    by Joenathan

    The Twelve was the last time I buy JMS from now on.

  • June 19, 2009, 10:54 a.m. CST

    Writer's contest

    by Joenathan

    It shouldn't be Fan-voted characters, it should be: Who can write the best self-contained twelve issue series about a TERRIBLE character. Someone really shitty... like... fucking Shatterstar or Maggot or Batroc the Leaper. The true test of writing strength is who can find the gold underneath all the poop.<br><br>Advantage: Ellis. Especially if he's paired with Cassidy.

  • June 19, 2009, 10:56 a.m. CST

    Is X-Men Forever still coming out?

    by Joenathan

    I figured it would be canceled by now...

  • June 19, 2009, 11:47 a.m. CST

    Bango

    by optimous_douche

    I refused to give any more money to Claremont or the 90s X-Men series. He's burned me one time too many in recent years, Exiles you bastard...Also I bought all five covers the first time X-men came out.<p> On The Twelve you are kind of hurting yourself, it was really really good and JMS got soooo close to completing. Liek if I got that close on aproject I would only be suspended instead of fired.

  • June 19, 2009, 12:13 p.m. CST

    steverodgers, Comic Book Writing Championship

    by Continentalop

    It is your idea, so you get the final say on how the winner is determined. But after reading some of the other people's post, I have a couple of suggestions for rules: <p> 1) You must include at least one new protagonist and one new antagonist who must play a major part in the series (to see if the writer is able to create new heroes and villains) <p> 2) At least two of the characters given to the writers will be considered Z-Listers. <p> 3) At least one of the characters have been created by Liefeld. <p> 4) The Bikini & Evening Wear competitions will only account for 1/4th of the possible votes.

  • June 19, 2009, 12:26 p.m. CST

    Continentalop/CBC

    by steverodgers

    Unfortunately I am not as yet in charge of a comic book company. Until that day, the idea is open source. We are all just hammering out the details, until someday someone rises from the talkbacks to make the Comic Book Contest of Champions a reality.

  • June 19, 2009, 12:36 p.m. CST

    Isn't rule 3 just a subset of rule 2?

    by SleazyG.

    Cuz it sounds that way...

  • June 19, 2009, 12:51 p.m. CST

    Firearm VHS, if anyone still cares.

    by cookylamoo

    Mailbu packaged the first issue of Firearm with a VHS tape that has about a half hour dramatization. Then the rest of the story is continued in the comic. Remind me to transfer my copy to DVD.

  • June 19, 2009, 1:15 p.m. CST

    Yes rule 3 is related to rule 2

    by Continentalop

    But it has its own unique features, kind of like how hitting below the belt in boxing is a foul, but hitting someone intentionally in the groin also listed separately under boxing rules. <p> Z-listers are hitting below the belt; Liefeld is getting hit in the groin.

  • June 19, 2009, 3 p.m. CST

    I like Rule 3

    by Joenathan

    Right away, you know, the weak need not apply.