Ain't It Cool News (www.aintitcool.com)
Review

Harry was blown away by the bloody great film, THE REVENANT in CineVegas!!!

You know - sometimes you're at a Festival. You have a great first day, but then... you just seem to be on a roll of forgettable or worse films. That isn't to say this festival isn't wonderful, because CINEVEGAS is! It's a party festival, one that fully uses everything that VEGAS has to infuse it with awesome good times. The other night, I meant to see the "world premiere" of THE REVENANT, but I'd seen a couple films that day - and the party opposite the premiere was at SAPPHIRE'S the 70,000 Square Foot Wal-Mart of Tits & Ass. The festival write up told me it was a zombie film, about a guy who dies in Iraq and is buried and comes back to life and hangs out with his best friend as they deal with the decaying body he occupies. Well, that didn't adequately fire me up to blow off Vegas Strippers with Yoko. No, I let you folks down and succumbed to my own lust for T&A that gets rubbed in your face, crotch, etc. Today started off with a film I hated from the get go, and I just hated it more with every continuing second, till at the 18 minute mark, I left the screening. It was so bad, I almost blew off seeing anything else at the festival. When a film sucks at this level, it's the sort of thing that makes you not want to see anything else. Then there was another film I saw that had moments, but didn't come together as one would hope. About 30 minutes before this movie, Yoko was asleep - and I was debating whether or not to wake her for the film, but I thought about the one color still I'd seen from the film. I liked the make-up. And hey - as well as doing AICN, I'm one of the lead programmers at Fantastic Fest and it is my duty, for the team, to see this festival's most likely candidate. By the time David Anders' reanimated BART - moaning in pain breaks into the funeral home, looks in the mirror horrified at his own eyes (which rule) - grabs a pair of scissors and snips through his sewn shut mouth, so he can speak... I was ON BOARD! I was officially rooting for the film, but knowing that it's a far cry to go from a cool scene to a full fledged genre piece of awesome. After all... as far as I knew, this film was about to turn into a film about a best friend taking care of the decaying talking corpse of his best friend... and well, I saw a film like that at SXSW and hated it. The first thing that makes this film awesome is the friendship as played between David Anders and Chris Wylde is note fucking perfect. Wylde's JOEY is a consummate best friend that doesn't want to lose his best friend again. And it doesn't matter if his best friend pukes black blood on his carpet and dining room table. It doesn't matter if he has to find blood for him, so they can still be tight. It doesn't matter if every night they have to kill someone and drain them of blood - because goddammit, that's what best friends do for one another! And yes, there's other characters. Girl Friends and nosey friends. But this is really a story about best friends being there for each other. Even if one of them is needing blood to keep from decomposing. NOW - their answer to the blood issue is to kill evil fucks and save innocent people from evil... and suck the bad people dry. That is an excellent plan. They're in Los Angeles, so there's plenty of nasty fucks to kill - and they get into it - and it does give them some problems later. The film this most resembles is NEAR DARK. Is it as great as NEAR DARK... that's difficult to say due to the rough state of the film I saw tonight. Sure, this may be its "World Premiere" engagement - but frankly the film is nowhere near done. What we heard was basically a stereo mix of a film that will have a far more powerful audio output later. The film was being screened off of essentially an avid output - which folks that know what that means know that you'll see a lot of artifacting, especially in the low light scenes, and the dark sequences - you'll lose a TON OF DETAIL that is actually there in the print waiting to be projected. Whenever it gets finished. There's also a bit of effects work that wasn't quite done, but again - they know it and it will be done before any of you are likely to see this fucking amazing film. Now - I have to warn some of you. There's shit that happens in this film that will turn some stomachs and make horror fans cheer! So... where the fuck did this film come from? The director's name is Kerry Prior. For all intents and purposes this is his first film as director. But you've seen his work as an effects man in everything from PHANTASM II & III & IV to THE ABYSS to Elm Street 3 & 4 to THE BLOB remake to CHRISTMAS VACATION to BUBBA HO-TEP!!! And it seems he's decided to make a real fucking horror film to stamp his name into the minds of geeks like us everywhere... and that's exactly what he has done with this film! The name that really gave me pause in the opening credits was the credited editor of this film. None other than WALTER MURCH. Yeah, the guy behind APOCALYPSE NOW, the re-edit of TOUCH OF EVIL, THE CONVERSATION and a great deal of other great films. I've no idea how Prior got Walter aboard, but damn if this film isn't nicely put together! This is a film you'll be hearing a lot about from here on. Be it on AICN or elsewhere. This is a great little genre film that gets exactly as nuts as one would hope a violent buddy flick can get with the undead. I am purposefully not talking about WHOLE ASPECTS of this film because you should let the film do that to you. In fact, when I found the trailer online, I got mad at it because frankly it gives too much away. But one thing is for sure, you'll love the tag line for this film: "You Think TWILIGHT Is A Vampire Movie?" Well, I do - it just doesn't have the balls or a twentieth of the awesome of this film. This is Vampire/Undead the way we love it. Bloody, Fucked-Up and Twisted as all Hell!

Readers Talkback
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  • June 14, 2009, 5:09 a.m. CST

    Holy crap, he worked on the remake of The Blob?

    by Frisco

    I'm sold! Walter Murch as editor is just icing on the cake. I'm glad you found something else that was cool at this show, Harry. It was starting to sound like a lame line-up. I mean, lame enough that it looks like you've been taking pity on it by not really trashing some movies by name, even if they deserve it. ;)

  • June 14, 2009, 5:12 a.m. CST

    You THING?

    by belasco_house

  • June 14, 2009, 5:14 a.m. CST

    Cant believe I pointed out a typo

    by belasco_house

    How lame is that? I need to reassess my life

  • June 14, 2009, 5:34 a.m. CST

    I don't Thing TWILIGHT Is A Vampire Movie.

    by RaveX

  • June 14, 2009, 5:35 a.m. CST

    the brothers blook might be a vampire movie, though

    by RaveX

    if it's supposed to be "the brothers blood".

  • June 14, 2009, 5:51 a.m. CST

    I doubt that it's better than Drag Me To Hell!

    by DerLanghaarige

    Because it was fucking awesome!

  • June 14, 2009, 6:12 a.m. CST

    Walter Murch didn't edit it

    by Adamz

    I spoke with the producer at Cinevegas, it's a joke. Look it up on IMDB, its all the director. Also the movie is pretty good through out but it has an ending that doesn't work as is.

  • June 14, 2009, 6:12 a.m. CST

    Sounds cool, but it also sounds like "Deathdream"

    by KarlKolchak

    "Deathdream" aka "The Night Andy Came Home" featured one of the most awesome sequences in movie history -- a car chase in which:<p> 1) The car being chased is on fire, and <p> 2) The car being chased contains a zombie.<p> If you take into consideration the fact it was directed by Bob Clark, who gave the world "A Christmas Story," that makes that muthafucka a must-see.<p> I loves me some zombies.

  • June 14, 2009, 7:16 a.m. CST

    Cheers for the movie check KarlKolchak, i do love me

    by bongo123

    some zombies and havent heard of that one and i have a christmas story... what a mix!!!

  • June 14, 2009, 7:21 a.m. CST

    Harry...what was the SXSW film you saw that you hated?

    by Jonah Echo

    about a friend taking care of the reanimated dead corpse? <p> I recently saw Make Out With Violence at the Maryland Film Festival, and it played at SXSW too. It had that basic premise(the zombie friend didnt actually talk though) and I thought it was quite awesome. <P> Another indie movie, but sort of existing between John Hughes and a zombie film. <P> Thats not the movie you are talking about is it? <P> This new theme of making the zombies have a more individual personality seems to be the latest thing. Not in a Bub way, but in a "hey, remember this guy, he's dead but we are still friends" way. Interesting. <P> The Revenant definitely sounds like a cool little film, and it has a vampire aspect to it? Terrific. <P> Anyway, if anyone wants to check it out, I did a review for Make Out With Violence over here: <P> http://cinematropolis.wordpress.com/2009/05/25/mff-review-life-death-summer-and-zombies/

  • June 14, 2009, 7:48 a.m. CST

    I thought Harry said Twilight was a teen-romance movie.

    by Amy Chasing

    Which I agree. I didn't like it but it was one. There may have been vampires in it, but it wasn't nearly as much of a vampire movie as it was teen-romance.

  • June 14, 2009, 8:09 a.m. CST

    Nobody with a brain thinks Twilight is a vampire movie

    by quantize

    its a foppy EMO fest

  • June 14, 2009, 8:41 a.m. CST

    Chan-wook Park's first English language film.

    by patolucas

    From what I read, a film by this title was to be directed by Chan-wook Park. His version was to be based on The Revenant by Michael Punke, a western revenge tale based on a true story. I bought the book used from Amazon. Awesome story.

  • June 14, 2009, 9:34 a.m. CST

    Twilight is a movie?

    by JMS Revolutions!

    I thought Twilight was a lifetime series.

  • June 14, 2009, 9:37 a.m. CST

    The remake of The Blob is so fuckin' awesome!

    by SoylentMean

    Yeah, it's cheesy as fuck. Yeah, it has the most annoying and weird looking Dillon (Kevin) with a hilarious mullet type thing. But holy fuck, the fx work in that movie are insane. This movie just went solidly on the radar.

  • June 14, 2009, 10:31 a.m. CST

    I cannot follow Harry's narratives.

    by dr sauch

  • June 14, 2009, 1:04 p.m. CST

    Sapphires...

    by conspiracy

    Do they still have the Giant Fucking Martini Glass?</p><p>Sapphires is "Nice" for the tourists...but bring the Brinks truck, you'll need it.</p><p> Cheetahs is a better bet for the hard core letch. The girls are just so much more wrong there it seems.

  • June 14, 2009, 1:19 p.m. CST

    Did you say "strippers with Yoko"?

    by Cruel_Kingdom

    Yoko likes strippers? I now officially have wood. :)

  • June 14, 2009, 2:01 p.m. CST

    blow off strippers

    by TheExterminator

    you big gay bastard...this is where proof reading is useful harry..unless you do suck off male strippers with your wife

  • June 14, 2009, 2:54 p.m. CST

    From the man who praised Hatchet?

    by reflecto

    No fucking thanks.

  • June 14, 2009, 2:54 p.m. CST

    Yawn..........

    by benlinus

    ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ..................

  • June 14, 2009, 4:12 p.m. CST

    Harry you need to retcon your opinion on "Twilight".

    by Holeman

    Like you've done plenty of times before. Hate the next one and use that an excuse, but every time you say you liked the first one I just want to kill you.

  • June 14, 2009, 5:25 p.m. CST

    The Movies No One Will Ever See Festival is on again?

    by lockesbrokenleg

  • June 14, 2009, 6:24 p.m. CST

    Agreed Harry...

    by djscott95

    The Revenant (despite needing some editing improvments and CGI updates) was pretty kick ass. Oh, and if the film you didn't make it through was "Stingray Sam"? You missed a hell of a good time. Don't know why you wouldn't like it. Its a damn fun film.

  • June 14, 2009, 7:27 p.m. CST

    Yeah, I can't follow this review either

    by nechyv

    Harry is not a good writer, barely mediocre.

  • June 14, 2009, 9:07 p.m. CST

    The Hangover review????

    by antonphd

    Are you going to at least review this film when it has it's home release? It's #1 this week for the second week and it's exactly the kind of movie that AICN loves and I just can't understand why there still isn't a review. Don't tell me you haven't seen it yet. This is the kind of film I have to rush home to read your review after watching. The balls out kind that ussually makes you giddy.

  • June 14, 2009, 9:34 p.m. CST

    Although Steve Mcqueen was missing, The Blob remake was awesome

    by theycallmemrtibbs

    ..... And that's all I have to say about that!

  • June 14, 2009, 10:41 p.m. CST

    antonphd

    by BadMrWonka

    that was either a really lame joke, or you are grossly misinformed.

  • June 14, 2009, 11:33 p.m. CST

    Looks like a modern day Dead Heat

    by Robusto

    The official site has a trailer. Trailers can be deceiving, but honestly it looks like something that would have came out fifteen years ago and been direct to video release. A post modern vampire buddy comedy with witty tarantinoesque dialog. Looks like a bastard movie from the 90's they forgot to release, or a really sad Shaun Of The Dead knockoff. Also Hatchet was one of the first movies in a long time I turned off within 30 minutes.

  • June 14, 2009, 11:36 p.m. CST

    Dead heat was awsome

    by Robusto

    way ahead of its time. But there's something about camera winking and non serious vampire movies that leave a bad taste in my mouth. It's too early to tear down the genre, we need some great films to come out. Lost Boys, Interview Vampire, hell even the first Blade is great vampire movie.

  • June 14, 2009, 11:41 p.m. CST

    BadMrWonka

    by antonphd

    What are you talking about? The Hangover has been #1 at the box office the last 2 weekends. Harry is ussually giddy in his love for films like this. I do rush back home from a film I really love to read what Harry has written about it. What's the lame joke or grossly misinformed thing about any of that? I don't come to read AICN to say shit about Harry. I don't waste by life saying shit about movie reviewers. I come here to share in the love of a film. I loved The Hangover and nobody talks about the joy of a movie experience in a way that I feel gets my own experience the way Harry does. And a few of the other reviewers here, but mostly Harry. What's the problem with that? Do you come to AICN to actually debate a movie or someone's opinion on a movie? Cause I don't waste my time debating entertainment. I spend my time enjoying entertainment. Which is why I appreciate that Harry stopped writing about films he doesn't enjoy. Cause why waste the time? Better to spend your time promoting something you love rather than something you don't love. Which is why I'm dissapointed that there hasn't been a review for The Hangover. I would have thought Harry would love it.

  • June 14, 2009, 11:43 p.m. CST

    oh, Harry's at CineVegas

    by antonphd

    eh, no wonder he's too busy to see The Hangover.

  • June 15, 2009, 12:26 a.m. CST

    ZOM-BOT GOT BANNED FOR SAYING www.NukeTheFridge.COM

    by hugejack21

    look http://tinyurl.com/kktw3a

  • June 15, 2009, 12:27 a.m. CST

    ZOM-BOT GOT BANNED FOR SAYING www.NukeTheFridge.COM

    by hugejack21

    look http://tinyurl.com/kktw3a

  • June 15, 2009, 12:27 a.m. CST

    ZOM-BOT GOT BANNED FOR SAYING www.NukeTheFridge.COM

    by hugejack21

    look http://tinyurl.com/kktw3a

  • June 15, 2009, 12:33 a.m. CST

    ZOM-BOT GOT BANNED FOR SAYING www.NukeTheFridge.COM

    by hugejack21

    look http://tinyurl.com/kktw3a

  • June 15, 2009, 12:34 a.m. CST

    Wow....

    by djscott95

    I just read about the Zom-bot ban... and between that and Harry revealing himself as a total film idiot at a festival that I'm currently enjoying the shit out of... I finally agree with all of the people on here that I was told to hate. This site is fueled by the people that pay. Get off of here if you know what is good for you. You are being fed information by the studios. Which film did Harry pour praise on pay for that suite? I admit that I have seen a dissapointing film or two at CineVegas this year, but not one that would make me walk out, but I don't get checks from the filmmakers. This is a sad, sad revalation for me. Ban me too, but other sites are doing it better, and without kickbacks.

  • June 15, 2009, 12:43 a.m. CST

    ZOM-BOT GOT BANNED FOR SAYING www.NukeTheFridge.COM

    by hugejack21

    look http://tinyurl.com/kktw3a

  • June 15, 2009, 12:47 a.m. CST

    Jesus Christ...shut the fuck up about The Hangover review....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    ....every site online has already stroked their cock to it. Its made an assload of money. What the fuck do you want? One more puff piece? Dumb fucking shit to whine about...

  • June 15, 2009, 12:59 a.m. CST

    DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD Please BACK UP ZOM-BOT!!!

    by hugejack21

    Did you see what Harry did to him?

  • June 15, 2009, 1:54 a.m. CST

    getting banned

    by martinlutherkrangjr

    getting banned isn't the end of the world. you kinda sound like a sissy running to dgdb and asking him to back you up. couldn't your friend zombot just make a new name and resume posting?

  • June 15, 2009, 1:59 a.m. CST

    on the subject of Twilight and vampires...

    by wridget

    http://www.jadedglade.com/053.php

  • June 15, 2009, 2:10 a.m. CST

    It's so sad the branwashing that Twilight

    by lockesbrokenleg

    is doing to average people. Fuck, the movie is terrible. It's NOT THAT GOOD. The books are average, too. Why, people, why?

  • June 15, 2009, 2:21 a.m. CST

    Paul Blart Mall Cop had the best selling DVD two weeks in a row

    by Trannyformers_Apologist

    Paul Blart Mall Cop had the best selling DVD two weeks in a row and made $146,336,178 dollars domestic

  • June 15, 2009, 2:34 a.m. CST

    why Twilight?

    by Rocco Curioso

    The power of teenage girls en masse is NOT to be underestimated. It's no secret that Titanic's box office was pushed way north to $1.8 billion courtesy of repeat viewings by teenage girls made moist by Leonardo DiCaprio. Same thing with Twilight and Robert Pattinson. Added to which 1.)Twilight had a built-in fanbase courtesy of the books, and 2.)Those teen girls who swooned over Pattinson dragged their moms to the theatre for their 2nd, 3rd, 4th viewings. Twilight had a $37 million budget and made TEN times that at the box office worldwide, and plenty more on DVD. Sound economics, indeed. It's a phenomenon. It will run its course, but not anytime soon.<P>I hope Harry's on the mark about The Revenant. I will always be indebted to AICN for making me full aware of Ginger Snaps early on. Maybe this will be another hidden gem of a horror movie.

  • June 15, 2009, 2:48 a.m. CST

    actually I've heard The Hangover is pretty good too.

    by Amy Chasing

    and yes, for a site that prides itself with being an Apatow fan-base-base-thingy, it is a bit odd not to be mentioning The Hangover as much as Year One has been.

  • June 15, 2009, 3:27 a.m. CST

    The Hangover was terrible

    by digital_soul

    I chuckled a few times in the opening 20 minutes and then the premise just got old. Its just full of random scenes that probably seemed funny to the writers when they were drunk, but in the harsh light of day just fall flat. I can picture it now - Hey wouldn't it be funny if Mike Tyson suddenly turns up and starts singing Phil Collins and decks one of the guys? Er..No not really, its just seemed totally forced and desperate and that's not taking into account that Tyson is a misygonist rapist as was clearly evident from the recent Tyson movie and shouldn't be celebrated in any way shape or form.

  • June 15, 2009, 3:34 a.m. CST

    The Hangover...

    by Rocco Curioso

    is 2009's comedy apex to Paul Blart: Mall Cop's nadir. Go see it; you will not be disappointed.<P>Sadly, the trailer for Bruno was in front of it. Something tells me that Sasha Baron Cohen as Europoofter fashionisto won't play quite as well as SBC as Eastern Euronoodlehead on a quest for Pamela Anderson.<P>As for that Apatow/Sandler/Rogen impending train wreck... I will steer clear. Cuddly just doesn't play to Sandler's strengths, and putting him & Rogen in the same movie is a bad idea. It's the comedy equivalent of a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup, rather than some halfwit sticking his chocolate bar into homey's jar of peanut butter, and mayhem ensues.<P>And as for Year One? Jack Black playing Jack Black as an obnoxious caveman(Id to Michael Cera's Superego, were Freud a prehistoric cave dweller, which he was not). That's just catharsis gone very, very wrong.

  • June 15, 2009, 4:45 a.m. CST

    Hello Harry

    by meta4

    Are you done being a biased prick and admit to your loyalists that your journalistic integrity is forever tainted by studio ball juggling?

  • June 15, 2009, 4:47 a.m. CST

    antonphd

    by BadMrWonka

    http://www.aintitcool.com/node/41315 <p> http://www.aintitcool.com/node/41302 <p> http://www.aintitcool.com/node/41317 <p> http://www.aintitcool.com/node/40386 <p> http://www.aintitcool.com/node/41262 <p> http://www.aintitcool.com/node/40129 <p> as I said, grossly misinformed...

  • June 15, 2009, 5:47 a.m. CST

    Brother Bill was blown away by "The Interns.."

    by Sal_Bando

    A great new movie about hilarious DC happenings AKA "The Full Monica..."

  • June 15, 2009, 7:01 a.m. CST

    He starts the review with saying it's a zombie movie.

    by Knuckleduster

    And ends it saying it's a vampire movie. What the fuck is it?

  • June 15, 2009, 7:11 a.m. CST

    Was the movie you left the screening for GI Joe?

    by In_Rainbows

    It's ok. I probably will too.

  • June 15, 2009, 7:26 a.m. CST

    Sapphire!

    by Stormshadow4life

    best strip club in vegas by far! and yet the lame Rhino gets all the attention.

  • June 15, 2009, 8:02 a.m. CST

    Billed as a ZOMBIE movie, but it's a VAMPIRE movie?

    by Fawst

    Cuz yeah... the whole article had me thinking it was a zombie story, and then the whole needing blood to survive thing came up. So it's zombie/vampire fusion movie? Ok, I'm down with that. Now I'm gonna go smoke a couple bowls and watch Let The Right One In for the first time.

  • June 15, 2009, 9:04 a.m. CST

    This movie needed more

    by Series7

    Decepticon testicles.

  • June 15, 2009, 10:09 a.m. CST

    Podcasts

    by joblessfilmreviews

    For film reviews check out the best movie podcast around http://tinyurl.com/l44edq

  • June 15, 2009, 12:44 p.m. CST

    Friedman Suing Fox For Wrongful Termination, Scientology Blamed

    by Trannyformers_Apologist

    New York Daily News say Friedman was fired not because he encouraged people to run out and illegally download one of his employers' own movies(Wolverine), while that same employer at the same time chided other writers for doing the same. Instead they say he was fired as part of some big conspiracy spearheaded by Scientology. No I am not joking.

  • June 15, 2009, 12:46 p.m. CST

    Harry's 'Bias' re: Meta4's comment

    by Cory849

    I'm not sure why Harry's bias is an issue in this talkback at all, Meta. But it just made me want to post something I've thought for awhile. I find it hilarious that studios would bother to curry favor with Harry or pray for a good review from him. Harry's readership basically makes up its own mind, and think that Harry is either on the take, as you do, or, best case scenario, a guy with pretty questionable taste that no one trusts. He's not an opinion maker. Take this for example - Harry gushed about Revenant. I reserved judgement. A couple of talkbackers said it was really good. Now I'm interested.

  • June 15, 2009, 12:47 p.m. CST

    LMAO

    by Trannyformers_Apologist

    Friedman’s attorney Martin Garbus is further claiming that the leak of Wolverine onto the internet 30 days early, the leak which Friedman used for his illegal downloading, was actually all the fault of Rupert Murdoch to begin with. “Apparently, someone made another copy for themselves,” he says. That’s right, they’re claiming Rupert Murdoch pirated his company’s movie.

  • June 15, 2009, 2:50 p.m. CST

    Film Reviews Podcast

    by joblessfilmreviews

    Ladies and gents for all of your filmic needs try listening to Jobless Film Reviews, find out reviews, info and top tens from two Candians without jobs, go to http://tiny.cc/aZrHe or subscribe at Jobless Film Reviews on iTunes

  • June 15, 2009, 2:56 p.m. CST

    Make Out with Violence sucked

    by JimBobCooter

    Simply REALLY WANTING to be John Hughes / Wes Anderson does not make one worthy of a comparison. Glad someone liked it, but it was boring and rambling and had no stylistic identity. Looking at your watch often during a movie with a zombie = fail. Can't wait to catch Harry's recommendation. Sounds like they did something new while getting the right tone.

  • June 15, 2009, 3:22 p.m. CST

    Harry...you walked out of a movie but loved Fanboys?!

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

  • June 15, 2009, 4:08 p.m. CST

    Sapphire=Unprofessional

    by Xiphos_2

    It's overpriced, the drinks are expensive and not particularly well made, it's way to big, glitzy bright and clean.<p> Now The Palomino in North LV is the shit. Full nude upstairs, booze and all sorts of dingy and dirty, dingy and somewhat dangerous is what strips clubs should be. The Palomino has that element and then some.<p> Special mention goes to Talk of the Town, it's on South LV Blvd I believe. It' attached to a porno shop so it's one stop shopping. Good times. Glitter Gulch sucks. Cheetahs and Spearmint Rhino are good. Plus there's a club east of the Strip near The Hard Rock that's really good. I'm drawing a blank on the name right now sorry.

  • June 15, 2009, 4:16 p.m. CST

    Twilight IS NOT a vampire movie!

    by Mr. Pricklepants

    God, I fucking hate that movie so much. Vampires DO NOT sparkle in the sunlight, they fucking burn to death in the sunlight. That's vampire 101. Obviously, that stupid cunt who wrote this shit hasn't read a vampire book or seen a vampire movie in her entire life. Because if she had, she wouldn't have come up with the single most stupid idea in the history of stupid ideas: vampire that sparkle in the sunlight. And let's not even get started about those retarded Twilight fangirls. Fuck those annoying bitches!

  • June 15, 2009, 5:13 p.m. CST

    TALK OF THE TOWN = PROFESSIONAL

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    A-FUCKING-MEN. I just mentioned that place to Series the other day for his bachelor party. <p>They say the world began, and it so shall it end in TALK OF THE FUCKING TOWN.

  • June 15, 2009, 5:31 p.m. CST

    I didn't think it possible...

    by rfid

    ...but somehow, Harry is becoming an even WORSE writer. Holy cow. My 10-year-old kid can write circles around his incoherent, misspelled, poorly punctuated gibberish. It's mind-bendingly bad.

  • June 15, 2009, 5:37 p.m. CST

    MAKE-OUT with VIOLENCE

    by saintaugust

    "MAKE-OUT with VIOLENCE" was the movie that Harry hated at SXSW. I know this because I'm one of the people that made it and I sat next to him at the screening. We never REALLY WANTED to be John Hughes/Wes Anderson - more like John Hughes/Terrence Malick/Andrei Tarkovsky. We're way too pretentious and self-aggrandizing to stive to be the next Wes Anderson. Sorry you didn't like the movie JimBob - we'll try harder next time. Thanks for the favorable Review cinematropolis guy.

  • June 15, 2009, 6:33 p.m. CST

    saint...were you the same guy who brought it to MFF?

    by Jonah Echo

    the Maryland Film Festival? <P> If so, I think I got your picture in there somewhere..and you sold me the soundtrack, which totally rocks, whether or not you like the movie...if it wasnt you, it was one of the Deagol Bros and a totally nice guy... <P> I totally think you guys nailed the movie and specifically the segments involving the mourning and the funeral. I also happen to think that you did manage to evoke Tarkovsky and Malick(Malick alot more than Tarkovsky)and I think there is definitely an audience out there for the movie. <P> Ever see Guatemalan Handshake? I saw it a previous MFF and it had a similar feel. No one at all was talking about that one, and still few have seen it, but David Gordon Green wrote a love letter of an intro for it for the dvd release. <P> The people I saw it with here in Baltimore were really impressed with it, and I definitely think it's not for everyone...but if you happen to be in the target audience, look out.. <P> If you guys ever start selling them off the website drop me a line over at cinematropolis and let me know. In fact, let me know about distribution either way if you can. <P> For what it's worth, I rented May years ago on Harry's request and while it was alright, I was baffled by the love for it. I just recently saw Dead Girl(the zombie one) and found it to be ridiculous and vile so I wouldn't sweat it too much. <p> i just have one question, and I know it was left vague, but...Who tied up Wendy and why? <P> So, what's next for the Deagol Bros?

  • June 15, 2009, 6:34 p.m. CST

    "them"= dvds of the film

    by Jonah Echo

    sorry...

  • June 15, 2009, 7:06 p.m. CST

    clip for the Revenant...

    by Jonah Echo

    Its funny, because apparently even the characters have conversations over whether he is a zombie or a vampire.. Looks like a good one to me: <P> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MDpVhd_MbJM&feature=related

  • June 15, 2009, 8:57 p.m. CST

    saintaugust -- next time bring Harry chili beans.

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    Thats all Eli Roth has to do! GULP GULP GULP GULP!! <p> Bale is with you my son, keep up the good work.

  • June 15, 2009, 8:59 p.m. CST

    saintaugust -- I've heard a lot of good things about it.

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    Email if you guys get it for sale anywhere. <P>dannyglovers.dickblood@gmail.com

  • June 15, 2009, 9 p.m. CST

    I didn't know the seventh state had a film festival

    by SoylentMean

    although I do know it does not have any naturally formed lakes. How strange. And just where the fuck was this Maryland Film Festival and why the hell wasn't this information plastered all over the local media?

  • June 15, 2009, 9:01 p.m. CST

    Somewhere in Vegas, right now, somebody is getting a disease

    by SoylentMean

    and paying for the priviledge. Vegas should be the model for every fuckin' town.

  • June 15, 2009, 9:40 p.m. CST

    Parked right next to the Megan Fox blow up doll factory

    by Sal_Bando

    Just because it's Professional, and it has Giant Robots nearby.

  • June 15, 2009, 9:42 p.m. CST

    Soylent...are you from Maryland?

    by Jonah Echo

    Its in Baltimore every year...I started a blog recently with a slightly Baltimore/Maryland centric slant... <P> Here it is:http://cinematropolis.wordpress.com/ <P> And here's my writeup of the MFF: http://cinematropolis.wordpress.com/2009/05/12/wrapping-up-maryland-film-festival-2009/ <P> It happens every year at The Charles Theater in Baltimore City and it usually runs on the second weekend of May

  • June 16, 2009, 12:08 a.m. CST

    Do Want

    by DrTobiasFunke

    Give it to me now!

  • June 16, 2009, 4:58 a.m. CST

    Saintaugust

    by JimBobCooter

    No need to be sorry... I'm just one asshole with an opinion. And I'm probably not your target audience anyway. But you have a fan in Soylent, so you must be doing something right. I just didn't get it. And you're right... maybe I'll love the next one. It's cool you get to keep making 'em.

  • June 16, 2009, 5:03 a.m. CST

    Sorry, I meant Jonah instead of Soylent

    by JimBobCooter

    Carry on.

  • June 16, 2009, 8:34 a.m. CST

    Make Out With Violence is REAL INDIE CINEMA!

    by Indiemaker0583

    Something that may be highly flawed but incredibly passionate comes along and he merely dismisses it. Asshole fanboys looking for the splatter of zombie films may be disappointed. But I programmed it at a rural festival that attracts a real, diverse, non fanboy audience and people were seriously moved by the picture. Sorry it's not Peter Jackson.

  • June 16, 2009, 9:48 a.m. CST

    Holy sh*t, Harry!

    by Indiemaker0583

    I just watched the trailer for this. Really? F*cking ACDC back in black is in the trialer. This is total garbage. The website's cheap, Grindhouse knockoff design. Ugh. The Revenant looks like a troma movie without the tits or fun.

  • June 16, 2009, 2:44 p.m. CST

    Mr_Incredible

    by Sith Witch

    Vampires burning up in daylight was an invention of the cinema. Remember that in the novel Dracula, he can move about by day, only his powers are weaker. No other vampire literature or mythology prior to that ever mentioned burning up in the sun, however a nice image and plot point it provides!

  • June 16, 2009, 11:56 p.m. CST

    And There's Harry's Box Quote! $$$

    by The_Floating_Skull_of_Robert_Loggia

    "This is Vampire/Undead the way we love it. Bloody, Fucked-Up and Twisted as all Hell!" It's perfect. Another hyperbole fueled Ain't it Cool News quote on the box of a rubbish movie. I'll add it to the stack I've got here...let's see...Hatchet, My Bloody Valentine 3-D...yeah, all high quality stuff. Go suck a bag of dicks!

  • June 17, 2009, 11:57 a.m. CST

    Could someone condense that 'article' for me?

    by NEUR0M4NCER

    Seriously, my eyes had glazed over before I was half way through.

  • June 18, 2009, 5:59 a.m. CST

    Man Harry....

    by RockyG

    With all your "blown aways", "taken abacks", and other greatest movie ever sayings..it's really difficult to take any of your reviews seriosuly. You use these sayiongs way too loosely my friend.

  • June 18, 2009, 11:33 a.m. CST

    DRAG ME TO HELL is still in theaters. Why must we forget so soon

    by NoDiggity

    Why are you wasting time with these bad movies when Sam Raimi's fantastic "Drag Me to Hell" is still in theaters? Join the "Drag Me To Hell" talkback! <br><br> http://tinyurl.com/ll7s4p <br><br> http://www.aintitcool.com/talkback_display/40453

  • July 21, 2009, 12:09 a.m. CST

    You lost me at

    by 35MinutesAgo

    "You know - sometimes you're at a Festival."

  • Feb. 6, 2010, 10:48 p.m. CST

    cxxVHNPm

    by dKhdKu

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  • Feb. 6, 2010, 10:49 p.m. CST

    cNMlOzu

    by dKhdKu

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  • Feb. 10, 2010, 6:20 p.m. CST

    Buy Xanax

    by dKhdKu

    qyKjbH

  • Feb. 11, 2010, 6:57 a.m. CST

    Alprazolam

    by dKhdKu

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  • Feb. 11, 2010, 9:13 p.m. CST

    Cialis

    by dKhdKu

    XDHtNPA

  • Feb. 12, 2010, 7:45 a.m. CST

    ???

    by orcus

  • Feb. 13, 2010, 9:36 a.m. CST

    Pall Mall cigarettes

    by dKhdKu

    LDptgDdK

  • Feb. 13, 2010, 9:42 a.m. CST

    They still make Pall Mall?

    by orcus

  • Feb. 14, 2010, 5:43 p.m. CST

    Buy Viagra

    by dKhdKu

    dAXIexHo

  • Feb. 14, 2010, 8:06 p.m. CST

    Viagra, the new uppers

    by orcus

  • Feb. 15, 2010, 2:51 p.m. CST

    Xanax

    by dKhdKu

    KIgdWa

  • Feb. 18, 2010, 12:45 p.m. CST

    Jeez here too?

    by orcus