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Seann William Scott and Adam Brody are a couple of dicks!
Ahoy, squirts! Quint here. I'm not going to get tired of the title for Kevin Smith's new movie... it's going to make for a year of inappropriate headlines.
Smith's A COUPLE OF DICKS starring Bruce Willis and Tracy Morgan is casting up, having just landed Seann William Scott and Adam Brody per Borys Kit of The Hollywood Reporter. I like both guys, actually, and they seem to be put into very suitable roles. Scott is playing a thief called The Shit Bandit who steals memorabilia and Brody looks to be playing the straight man, a detective along for the ride with Tracy Morgan and Bruce Willis as they try to solve a case about a valuable stolen baseball card.
I don't know about you, but seeing Willis paired with Morgan sounds brilliant to me. Smith is going to have to go a long way to fuck this one up, methinks. What say you?
-Quint
quint@aintitcool.com
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...that came up with this one?
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What's a matter with you people? Can't you post faster?
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Until A Couple of Dicks show up...
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"The Shit Bandit"?A COUPLE OF DICKS?Fucking hell. What happened to good comedy? Did someone kill it?
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Even the overly-offensive Dogma. Or the overly-offensive Clerks 2. Even Chasing Amy was enjoyable the first time around, though I never said to myself, boy, I want to see that again. Still haven't seen Jersey Girl.Sounds like it'll be pretty good. With Bruce Willis and Tracy Morgan, not to mention Brody, it sounds like this is sure to be another Hudson Hawk. A movie I liked, BTW.
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Hard to go wrong with a first name like Kevin. And Smith is a good, solid, all-American kind of surname. A good time is virtually guaranteed.
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Unless there is some creative backstory that explains the stupid name. Which I have a hard time imagining. "A COUPLE OF DICKS" is a great frickin' name for a detective comedy. Since it had not yet been done, it had to be done, just because there was a vacuum in the universe that had to be filled by that film title, to restore order and balance to the universe. Come on.
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I'll imdb tell me.
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Shut the fuck up.
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and there was me thinking it was gonna be some hot chick.
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The 'other black guy'. One of the best SNL skits. The dude is hilarious.
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which guys are the "couple of dicks"? And, you don't know who Tracy Morgan is? Used to be on SNL, now is on 30 Rock.
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You're not making a comic book! You've made it. You're part of the movie industry. You're allowed to make grown-up films. I'll tell you what, why not set a target. Try to make a film that could possibly make it to Cannes. That's a worthy goal. No?
Okay. You're right. Stick with "the Shit Bandit". Guuh. -
Sasha Grey's daily schedule when she's not making Soderbergh films.
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GRAWWWWR KEVIN SMITH IS A SHIT SANDWICH WITH FAT VAGINA JUICE ALL OVER HIS SHITTY MOVIES! I WISH SOMETHING BAD WOULD HAPPEN TO HIM BECAUSE HE MAKES MOVIES I DONT LIKE! SPRAWWWWWWGH!!!
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That's you. That's what you sound like.
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A dual biography of the guys who played Darrin on BEWITCHED.
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Hey, ignoramus. Mr Smith already brought movies to Cannes. If you weren't such a fucking hate-tank, you'd know that.
Clerks 2 got an 8 minute standing ovation at Cannes.
And Dogma was one of the major hits of the 1999 Cannes Film Festival.
So here's a thought. You've made it, you're part of the talkback community. You're allowed to think about something, before you post. You're allowed to verify your so-called facts, before you post. That's a worthy goal. No? Okay. Stick with being an ignorant cunt then. -
I grew up.....he didn't.
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Unless Kevin Smith became Christopher Nolan overnight.
Ok I will admit it will probably be as good if not slightly better than the best Kevin Smith movie.
Yikes! -
I stand corrected! I'll go out right now and purchase the DVD.
Thanks, V'Shael. -
Tracy Morgan is fucking hillarious. He plays a toned down version of himself on 30 Rock, but if you ever get the chance to hear him on Howard Stern, you'll realize he's the real deal and that's 'not really' a character he's playing on TV, Dude is straight up funny and completely real, in the sickest and funniest of ways. Trust me, this bodes well for this film.
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Clerks 2 got an 8 mins? Really? Wow. Didn't know that... I'm a HUGE fan of all things Askewniverse, but even i thought that movie was a steaming pile. I'm actually kinda shocked...
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It's apparent from past films that Kevin Smith can fuck up anything.
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Tell us some shit we don't know, Quint.
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Awesome casting brown-eye. Can't wait to see this one.
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I heard that was only because the film in the projector broke 20 minutes into it.
Ba-ZING! -
Really? Ugh, I give up... It's official folks; Comedy in Cinema is all but dead and we have the likes of Smith And Apatow to thank for it.... I'll just stay home and re-watch stuff like Arrested Development and Spaced as a reminder of what great comedy used to be like....
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I don’t usually go Troll and post negative but I HATE (HAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTEEEEEE!!!!!!!) Tracy Morgan. If they dropped him from 30 Rock I would actually watch that show. His whole ignorant persona annoys the hell out of me. He’s not funny he’s a bad actor and I want him to go away.
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Because I generally like Kevin Smith movies. I don’t own any or know every line like some fan boys but I’ve seen most things he’s put out and was entertained. I think I’ll skip this one though.
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get it?!GET IT?!aw c'mon i'm kevin smith, get it?
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Slow clapping until Smith got the merry fuck out of there, print and all.
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is the man. can we get confirmation from the bearovingian about his role
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is an english surname dummy
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No talent. He is not even in the same solar system as funny. How he has any employment ever is as big a mystery as who would watch a reality show about two turds and 8 kids. Wonders of the modern world.
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Jerry Lewis, so their taste in comedy is suspect.
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would be a better title. Everyone loves Triple D's.
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If so, it's already fucked up
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May 28, 2009 8:53:41 AM CDT
Smith typically does well to entertain, however...
by theporkchopexpress
He's in dangerous territory... http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u= cop_movie
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After the movie bombs like Zack and Miri did he can then ponder again if the title had anything to do with it. Stop trying to be clever with the titling.
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but I love Tracy Morgan and Bruce Willis. Sean William Scott is hit or miss (mainly miss) Adrian Brody is definitely capable. The "Shit Bandit", is so weak and unfunny.
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His movies get worse and worse. I wish he would just go away
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I'm a huge fan of his, and I think he has actually grown as a director over the years to the point that some of the criticism levied his way isn't exactly fair. That being said, he is a much better writer than director. I'd rather see him write more and perhaps hand scripts over to other directors rather than see him direct someone else's script. For instance, what if Smith finished his Fletch script and had Braff direct/star in it? Or if he finished writing Green Hornet and then Robert Rodriguez directed it?That being said, while Clerks 2 was good Kev, I still don't think it was Chasing Amy, and I really hope you have another one in you. And part of what made Chasing Amy such a great film was that it was honest, and a bit dark. Clerks 2 is a little too sitcomish to be fairly compared to Chasing Amy.
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The script was one floating around on the so-called "Black List" of the best scripts in Hollywood that haven't been made yet. Supposedly the script is so good that Willis, Morgan and Smith are all basically taking scale and points to make the movie on the cheap, based on their faith that the movie will do well. Smith has said the movie is pretty adult, with harsh language, but not like the language in his scripts.
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I am stil a huge Kevin Smith apologist and will argue even Jersey Girl has it's merits, especially considering the genre of that particular film, but there was no excuse for Zack and Miri. He was just trying too hard.
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Yes, I'll stand up and say it. He steals random shit. I see it. I can see, perfectly, Seann Williams Scott calling himself this proudly - with a Stifler-like, fratboy demeanor.
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is just like the character he plays on 30 Rock. He's a moron. He can't play any other characters and can barely read. And possibly a semi functional retard.
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Shit Bandit is right up his alley.
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Likes to tuck shirts into little boys pants.
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I like everything about this, except that. Damnit, it's just not funny. Less is more.
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Heterosexual America still can't even remotely handle anything having to do with the penis. It's just THAT SCARY apparently.
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Kevin Smith shot whatever load he had with Clerks & Chasing Amy. Everything else since has been garbage. The "Shit Bandit" should give it up, and stop releasing these embarassing turds.
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i finally jumped the Smith bandwagon after Jay and Silent Bob, and with crap like Clerks II and Zack and Miri, i havent regretted it once. Its hard to believe he was once one of my favorite writer/directors.
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i think its this. the first one had ridiculous conversations, but it felt like stupid shit i would talk about with friends or girlfriends in real life. everything in 2 felt fake and unnatural. just cant see talking about ass-to-mouth or getting pissed off about it like Dante was. it was just out of touch. also, i think two 20 somethings stuck in deadend jobs at a convenience store is pretty relatable, but two 30 somethings working fast food is just pathetic. if you're 30 and you work at McDonald's, you've failed. no reason to like Dante and Randall then. they are just losers.
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in his abilities as a director. And BMacSmith is spot on w/ repeating the childish titles. Another reason he dude has no ideas or creativity. But, I"m by far not a fan of Smith's.
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Guaranteed failure, like Zack & Miri Make a Porno.
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And homosexual America still can't even remotely handle anything having to do with the pussy. It's just THAT SCARY apparently.
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Great evaluation of the differences between Clerks and Clerks 2.
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This guy is TERRIBLY overrated. The title of this film alone will cause quite a few theaters to drop the film. *sigh I can see the first graders asking their moms about what "dicks" are. Thanks, Kevin Smith. The fat, repulsive fanboys aren't numerous enough to bring your "burned eggs" of a movie enough money to justify the studios to continue greenlighting ridiculously unfunny projects. I don't know if this guy EVER had a movie that was worth its weight in celluloid. He is useless...and one of the most overrated writers/directors to have ever taken up space in Hollywood.
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Good point. We can feel sorry for two 20-something losers who hold ridiculous conversations while working at their convenience store. We feel sorry for them because we realize that their are losers...who might have time to get their lives back on track. Yet when we see these SAME losers a decade later still working loser jobs and having the same loser conversations...it is tragic. It makes you depressed that there are actually people out there who live and talk like that.
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just from what's mentioned about a stolen baseball card, it sounds like Kevin Smith is riffing somewhat off of Victor Gischler's novel Suicide Squeeze, which had a rare baseball card signed by Joe DiMaggio and Marilyn Monroe. Yeah, it was a fire in a comic/baseball card shop for an insurance thing in the novel and not someone going and stealing the cards, but I wonder how close the two will come to each other.
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which the movie is about so i dont see why they'd have problems with it. the titel is referring to the main characters jobs, and probably their personalities but its not talking about a penis. and if some kid asks their parent what a dick is, you say the truth..its a slang for cop.
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2 hours of just a couple of dicks.
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But you know that this title is a double entendre. No one under 60 yrs old calls a "cop" a "dick"...because a "cop" is slang anyway. Regardless of whether or not YOU have a problem with the title, there will be a lot of movie theaters who will have a problem with a movie poster or marquee with the word "dicks" on it. If asked by my nephews or nieces, I will tell them the truth. Some useless, idiot director thought that the word in the title would be "funny" -- even though they knew they were trying to use a double entendre.
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If this is double entendre is "clean" enough of a standard for movie title, let's see if we can name a film about two cats in love "LICKING PUSSIES." I think that the theaters and public wouldn't appreciate that title either.
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mark my words.
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but he was really funny in that and Scott is pretty cool too. I dunno, it might be better if they starred in something together. Tracy Morgan is one of those people that I don't know is actually funny, like Bill Cosby. It always seemed like funny happened around him. Maybe that's it's own kind of funny.
I don't know if I'll see this. I think I've been unconsciously boycotting Kevin Smith until I see him wearing an actual pair of pants. -
what the fuck was this announcement about?
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The internet is a place to download porn and bitch about movies.
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For fucks sake fart joke master, give it up already and just write comics.. you're good at that..
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Have you Seen Tracy Morgan on 30 rock? I used to place him very readily into the "meh" column, i know think he's a bonafide genius. oh and Morgan with Bruce Willis? Is it too early to buy my tickets?
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is an edit function ever on the horizon?
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Fuck is it tiresome.
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...i thought, what better way to start on ain't it cool then to draw a line in the sand as a kevin smith fan! that'll surely ensure my credibility for years to come...
from what i've read about "the shit bandit"...apparently it refers to something he does after a crime to indicate that he has, indeed, left his mark... -
I thought Smith was going to do that next.
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is a cinematic idiot. Watch clerks, SKIP EVERYTHING ELSE, then watch Zach and Miri. The Smith that made Clerks did not have the skill or imagination to compose that tracking shot where Zack crosses the gym.
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I can say that with 99% certainty. Political land scape has changed.
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I thought Zack and Miri would be his first breakout hit. Man was I wrong. What a terrible film and coming off Clerks 2. I was so gutted.
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It's coming out as a comic, plus he's doing another run on Batman. I love Kevin's comics.
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No he didn't write this script and he's making it for Warners. First time away from the Weinstein family.
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May 28, 2009 2:59:49 PM CDT
Kevin Smith is the Anti-Christ, blah blah blah...
by hercules_will_die_alone
hey talkbackers, table three needs a refill. In the meantime Kevin Smith is fucking paid.
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...in the San Francisco Bay Area...since it is the only thing that he can seem to do right. He can even spread his anti-conservative bigotry to anyone who will listen...and they will probably agree with him. He could do a few mockumentaries...but I worry that they would be very, very bad. At least Michael Moore offers talent to his uber-propaganda pieces. Smith? He is famous for...uh...umm...Clerks? It is time for the studios to stop wasting their money on this no-hit wonder. I actually feel sorry for the guy. He might actually think that he is a productive anti-member of the Hollywood establishment...but he is just as engrossed by studio bigwigs as, well, Michael Moore and Harry Knowles. Maybe he can write and direct CLERKS 3: WORKING AT THE STUDIO CAFETERIA. That would be hilarious! He could offer inside information about what the cafeteria workers hear from the studios.
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May 28, 2009 3:46:58 PM CDT
Yeah, let's end the bigotry against rich white men!
by hercules_will_die_alone
We'll get to the poor, blacks, women, gays and everyone else later. When are conservatives going to get a break in this country, and proof that under their leadership things in the USA will improve substantially?
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and he cast David Early in his last movie. But those are the only reasons I don't think he's a total waste of space.
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I was going to read the rest of the TB, but really, I just need to read Jedi's first couple of posts up top.
Hilarious. -
I have said it once and I have said it again.
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That is some wonderful prose. I'm convinced that you could write a movie that is leaps and bounds better than Smith's work, Gus Van Rant.
Go ahead, man. Run along and go write yourself something badass and go get it made. We'll be waiting right here... -
...because you're all going to watch it anyway.
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be as bad as Zak and Miri make a Porno.... well.... it is Kevin Smith so I will check this out when it hits HBO or something.
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Well, it would sure beat this TAX & SPEND philosophy that is currently wrecking this nation. Of course, this isn't Kevin Smith's fault. If anyone needs to be taxed...it is Hollywood studios and the profits of trial lawyers.
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his movies would be a helluva lot better. You might still feel guilty for watching them but not because you just wasted $9 you could've spent on a subscription to a classy porn site with lesbians.
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I feel sorry for you.
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Smith is a fucking hack.
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...I still couldn't hate him any more.
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is an interesting proposition. He did a good job on the Reaper pilot. I fear this may be an attempt by Smith to break the 30 million opening weekend curse. He stated in smodcast how much of a bummer is was to make the smallest grossing Seth Rogan movie. A writing break may be in line for Smith.
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is an interesting proposition. He did a good job on the Reaper pilot. I fear this may be an attempt by Smith to break the 30 million opening weekend curse. He stated in smodcast how much of a bummer is was to make the smallest grossing Seth Rogan movie. A writing break may be in line for Smith.
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the Paris Hilton diet.
Sorry for the double post -
Kevin Smiths 3 issue run on Batman was terrible. just awful.
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but I didn't care too much for Smith's Zack and Miri. This seems like more of the same... without the porn... maybe... i dunno... anyone care for a chocolate pretzel?
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Thanks for the info. Now I just hope Smith delivers a good movie. He hasn't made a good one since Dogma.
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Kevin did not write this. this will be the first MOVIE he directs that he didn't also write. so everyone quit saying the movie will be crap b/c he can't write or w/e
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I know why that's you're name, BECAUSE YOU'RE FUCKING RETARDED! Tracy Morgan a Genius?! I would go so far as to call him one of the worst things on TV today. He contributes to the dumbing down of society, much like Larry the cable guy, and pretty much any Celebrity reality show. How can anyone find him funny in any way other than a pity laugh? As in “Aw look at that poor mentally handicapped person, we should laugh at his jokes to make him feel better”
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Let me guess... He's gay.
I like a few of Kevins films but Zack and Miri was horeshit. The shit joke was funny if only because of the fact it was so in your face (god i'm funny...) but there was so many fucking easy jokes in it. The hand heater down the pants? WTF... -
when he talks at colleges...not so much when he writes scripts anymore.
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