International Eye Candy
May 12, 2009

Yes, this edition of the International Eye Candy arrives a couple days early thanks to the imminent arrival of Cannes and the very long time I am about to spend in a metal cylinder high above the ground. But that's not to say there isn't good stuff in here because there is, and lots of it! We've got Monica Bellucci! We've got a heaping pile of Indonesian whoop-ass! We've got ninjas and cowboys and Indians and horses! But before we get to the good stuff I present to you werewolves having sex. Yes, this movie really exists.

We start with the whoop-ass, this coming in the form of the first trailer for MERANTAU. Once upon a time Indonesia had a pretty proud tradition of martial arts films but that time is now long past, the last true action star to come from the nation being Barry Prima, and his career wrapped up about a quarter century ago. Well, make way for Iko Uwais because he's bringing Indonesian martial arts back. And when we say Indonesian we really mean Indonesian because Uwais is a master of a local martial art called silat and - to the best of my knowledge - this is the first ever film to ever feature the art front and center despite there being something like two hundred distinct varieties of silat practiced all around the world. Remember the last time a young man from south east Asia brought a largely ignored martial art to the screen? Yeah, this feels kind of like that.

Find the MERANTAU trailer here

From Indonesia we head to Spain, where Guillermo Del Toro has been wearing his producer's cap for INSIGNIFICANT THINGS. Revolving around a young girl who collects items lost by strangers there seems to be a bit of an AMELIE vibe to the story, though this one seems to play things a little bit more straight. One thing is certain, however: Guillermo's got great taste so if he's involved you know it's solid. The trailer certainly is.

Find the INSIGNIFICANT THINGS here

It was a hit at Tribeca and now absurd (mostly) Danish comedy ORIGINAL has finally got itself a proper theatrical trailer. This is the debut feature from a young duo who, when they're clicking, play kind of like a fusion of Spike Jonez and the Coen Brothers. This is, of course, ludicrously high praise, but hey – check it out for yourself. The pictures don't lie.

Be an ORIGINAL here

Enough with the subtitles and / or just plain not being able to understand what's being said for a moment! We head now to jolly old England where EVIL ALIENS director Jake West has just dropped the trailer for his new horror-comedy DOGHOUSE. SNATCH's Stephen Graham is in there along with DOCTOR WHO sidekick Noel Clarke and SEVERANCE's Danny Dyer and that's before we even get to the swarm of very angry, very violent, virally infected and zombified women who are intent on breaking up the boys' weekend away by breaking up the boys. If you've seen EVIL ALIENS you know what to expect here and, if not, come on … it's called EVIL ALIENS. Figure it out.

Find the DOGHOUSE trailer here

Trust me on this one: PANIQUE AU VILLAGE (aka A TOWN CALLED PANIC) is one of the single greatest creations in all of human history. It is absurd and juvenile and gut-bustingly funny. And it's making the leap from bizarre television series to equally bizaare feature film. Don't try to understand it, just watch and enjoy. And then ask me how happy I am I have to leave Cannes the day before this screens in the midnight program. Grr.

Find the PANIQUE trailer – and a complete scene - here

People, we need to give Spanish film maker Elio Quiroga some love. Working on an impossibly tight budget a couple years back Quiroga turned out a film titled LA HORA FRIA, or THE DARK HOUR. It was a claustrophobic little post-apocalyptic film that took a compelling character story and fused it to hard ass action-horror with some great scifi elements to become one of the most ambitious indie genre films I think I've ever come across. And it all worked, too, which made it even more impressive. And not much of anybody noticed and the film was left to die a quiet death.

Well, Quiroga is back now with his new film NO DO (The BECKONING), once again a film whose ambitions well outstrip its budget, though once again, Quiroga is more than up to the task. Part family drama, part government/religious conspiracy theory, part haunted house and possession film, NO DO throws a whole lot of elements into the pot and stirs them up into one very compelling whole. The Spanish release is coming in June and the first theatrical trailer has just arrived.

Turn the lights down and the volume up for the NO DO trailer here

I promised you Monica Bellucci and here she is, paired up with Sophie Marceau for French thriller NE TE RETOURNE PAS (DON'T LOOK BACK). Like PANIQUE up above, this one is slated to premiere as part of the midnight program in Cannes where it is already one of the most hotly anticipated titles. And how's this for a premise: not only are Bellucci and Marceau in the same film, it appears that they're actually in the same body – the two actresses playing the same character in the brain-melting psych-thriller.

Check out a pair of teasers – one dedicated to each actress – here

He's not nearly as nice to look at, I agree, but I did also promise you some new Van Damme and here it is. As anyone who has seen JCVD can tell you the Belgian action star is desperate to regain control of his life and career after a long sojourn in straight to video hell and a major part of his plan to do so is tied up with THE EAGLE PATH, the film Van Damme wrote and directed himself for his own company right after JCVD. Yes, this movie is at least one of the reasons that Van Damme opted not to be part of Stallone's EXPENDABLES. What's been labeled the first trailer has just released, though it honestly feels a bit more like a sales reel. Whatever you want to call it, though, it features a whole lot of Van Damme being Van Damme for Van Damme, which is all the Van Damme that fans could possibly ask for.

Travel THE EAGLE PATH here

Ninjas. You gotta love 'em though, sadly, there are very few ninja movies actually worth loving. But with a fistful of ninja movies in the works right now that will hopefully be changing and my guess is that the best of the lot will be Yoichi Sai's KAMUI. Adapted from the popular manga series KAMUI GAIDEN, this is one very healthy budgeted affair with a big time cast – DETROIT METAL CITY star Kenichi Matsuyama is in the lead – from one of Japan's finest directors and the first bits of footage to be shown are both a) absolutely gorgeous and b) absolutely ass kicking. This is a good combination.

Find a pair of KAMUI teasers here

Oh, now this has been a long time coming. Tran Ahn Hung's I COME WITH THE RAIN has been one of the most anticipated titles on the international circuit for about two years now. The globe hopping, very bloody psych-thriller is a huge departure for director – more given to quiet arthouse pictures – who is blessed here with a huge international cast of Josh Hartnett, Lee Byung-Hun, Shawn Yue, and Takuya Kimura and a rumored original score from Radiohead. Pictures of Lee, who you'll soon be seeing in GI JOE, doused in blood – apparently after having just violently killed someone – sent fans throughout Asia into a frenzy last year and the sales promo that leaked shortly afterwards said that frenzy was well deserved. This thing looks amazing. But there hasn't been any footage to show in public until now, with the arrival of the first Japanese teaser. Now, this has been cut to suit Japanese tastes, which means the tone is very different from the look of the earlier sales reel and what I expect the tone of the finished film to be but there are still plenty of stunning visuals to be had.

Find the I COME WITH THE RAIN teaser here

And, finally, we conclude in Sweden with a brand new clip from Tarik Saleh's Kafka-esque animation METROPIA. Vincent Gallo and Juliette Lewis provide the lead voices in this, a story of mind control and paranoia set in a massive underground city where commercial conglomerates are king. The visual style is disturbing close to photorealism and the extended promo they screened in Berlin back in February more than enough to convince me that this is a title to watch very closely indeed. We ran the trailer a little while back and that has now been joined by an extended scene from the film.

Enter METROPIA here