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Hercules Gives J.J. Abrams’ New Kirk-Spock STAR TREK Movie Five Stars Out Of Five!!
SPOILER ALERT !!
I am – Hercules!!
J.J. Abrams’ enormously entertaining new “Star Trek” movie will prove the highest-grossing Trek movie BY A MILE, for 12 reasons.
1) IT’S A REPEATER. Things move so fast, and the film is so dense with imaginative plot and imagery, even people who aren’t sure they liked it could find themselves compelled revisit it, and revisit it with a cinema audience. As with “Star Wars” and “Raiders of the Lost Ark,” amazing things fly by at such a furious clip it demands to be seen more than once.
2) IT’S FOR DILETTANTES. And dilettantes drive worldwide boxoffice. Moviegoers need bring no prior love for Kirk, Spock, McCoy or Orion slave girls to the cinema; “Star Trek” will make moviegoers love them all on its own. This is first great big-screen effort from J.J. Abrams, a guy I’ve been calling a genius since the “Felicity” pilot.
3) IT’S FUNNIER. The new movie is likely the funniest Star Trek project to date, and certainly the funniest since the whale-centric “Star Trek IV.” Abrams’ name is not on the screenplay, but his sophisticated comic acumen suffuses the enterprise. If you will. I laughed more during this movie than I laughed during any non-Apatow movie released last year.
4) IT’S ROYALE. The new “Star Trek” is a corker for the same reason “Casino Royale” is: it had to be. Pine, Quinto, Saldana, Cho, Pegg, Yelchin and Greenwood look, sound and act little like Shatner, Nimoy, Nichols, Takei, Doohan, Koenig and Hunter, and it does not matter. Kirk, Spock, Uhura, Sulu, Scotty, Chekhov and Pike are reborn here as rich and compelling new characters played by new and, in some cases, more accomplished actors.
5) URBAN OFFERS REAL McCOY. Every Trekkie will single out New Zealander Karl Urban’s beguiling performance as the medical officer in large part because he’s the only actor in the movie who succeeds in honoring not only his character but the actor who played his character 40 years ago. Urban takes a tough actor to impersonate, DeForest Kelley, and embodies him spectacularly. And because McCoy masterminds Kirk’s assignment to the Enterprise at a crucial moment, Urban is given a role that’s not only entertaining, but could not prove more pivotal to the Federation’s survival.
6) KIRK’S COOL. That scene that introduces us to Preteen Kirk – the one with the convertible and the robocop we’ve been watching for the last six months – is much more fun in its entirety, thanks largely to a completely unanticipated piece of music – utilized in a manner that filled me with a rare spasm of GLEE! GLEE!!! It is the perfect introduction to two-fisted supergenius James Tiberius Kirk and worth the price of admission in itself.
7) SPOCK’S HEART. The minute we’re done with Preteen Kirk, we jump to tiny Preteen Spock as he navigates a Vulcan teaching machine hugely evocative of the one he navigated at the start of the whale movie. An adorable sequence, it makes you fall in love with this new Spock instantly. Which is key, because Spock is the movie’s heart.
8) BANA OUTPERFORMS. Star Trek villains for some reason almost always indulge an agreeable theatricality, but Australian Eric Bana surprises with a performance that is not only unusually naturalistic but also startlingly American. Heath Ledger died early during principal photography on “Trek,” and I’d wager a sack of cash that Ledger’s performance in the “Dark Knight” trailers brought to bear some influence on Bana’s approach to the Romulan. (I’m also pleased to see the forehead appliances are gone and that the Romulans look like Vulcans again.)
9) ZOE SALDANA’S HOTITUDE. Gene Roddenberry may have boned up for Nichelle Nichols, but she never did a lot for me. Of the second-tier crew, Uhura gets the juiciest upgrade and the gorgeous Saldana makes a lot of it. A far hotter Nichols, lanky Rachel Nichols (“Alias,” “The Inside”), makes a memorable cameo as Uhura’s green, half-naked (and presumably Orion) academy roommate. (Oh, and much love to whoever decided to bring back those fabulous, sexist, objectifying Starfleet minidresses!)
10) BONUS NIMOY. Ever see “The Third Man”? You’re so absorbed in all the intrigue and suspense and comedy surrounding Joseph Cotton’s character that you kind of forget big-deal movie star Orson Welles is in the movie too – but boy is it cool when Welles finally turns up! Spock Prime is the Harry Lime of Abrams’ “Star Trek.” The most iconic thespianic element of the piece, he improbably kicks a perfectly splendid movie into a higher gear.
11) THE GUTSY PREMISE. The ambitious story, which spans centuries and allows the movie to exist as a sequel and a prequel, is dark and inspired. “Star Trek: First Contact” and the prequel series “Star Trek: Enterprise” also make use of warring factions from the future who alter events preceding Kirk’s birth – but Abrams’ “Trek” pushes the conceit well beyond the reach of an episode-ending undo button and into the realm of catastrophic system error and reboot. (It is monstrously cool that Captain Pike is in the movie, but insanely cool what’s done with him.)
12) WHAT’S NOT TO LIKE? The film has flaws, but they are fleeting and don’t diminish overall enjoyment. I will speak of these flaws only in spoiler-cloaking Romulan Invisotext.
* Nero’s quarter-century disappearance is a puzzlement! I have a vision of the Romulan first officer, 19 years into the watch for Spock’s 25-years-later emergence from the wormhole, leaning over to Nero and muttering, “I don’t think he’s coming.” Followed by a beheading and the creation of a new first officer. (A written and shot but deleted sequence depicting Nero’s escape from Klingon prison might have remedied somewhat my confusion.)
* I don’t know how many square miles comprised the surface area of that ice planet, but I’m guessing it’s a pretty mammoth coincidence that Young Kirk and Spock Prime would find themselves situated just a few minutes distance from each other.
* Spock Prime concealing his presence and risking the annihilation of Earth and the other Federation planets just to foster a Young-Kirk/Young-Spock teaming struck me as a wildly unnecessary risk.
* Whatever it looks like in the commercials, the Cloverfield Monster sequence on the ice planet seamlesslessly marries the “bigger fish” scene from “Phantom Menace” to the Space Yeti sequence from “The Empire Strikes Back” without really adding anything. I get why it’s there, but its flashiness doesn’t disguise a flaccid action beat.
* Montgomery Scott’s introduction to the Enterprise probably sounded funny on paper (the engineer gets stuck in the ship’s plumbing!), but the finished product feels like something out of a Harry Potter movie; the sequence works as neither comedy or suspense.
* While poor Pavel Chekhov had to spend two years as ensign in the original series, Kirk is assigned the captaincy of a Constitution-class starship the minute he graduates from the academy. No stints of any length as ensign, lieutenant or commander required. While Kirk’s restoration to the captaincy gives fans serious closure, his meteoric ascension also seems wildly improbable. (It would have been hilarious to get a reaction shot of a certain bald Enterprise security officer as Kirk takes the center seat.) But it’s a movie-ending lapse with mammoth positive emotional resonance, and one audiences will be more than happy to indulge.
The original TV theme plays over the closing credits, which look like the covers of James Blish’s old “Trek” novelizations. Abrams may not be a Trekkie, but he made a movie that makes my Trekkie heart sing.
Follow Herc on Twitter here.
Trekkies Bash New Star Trek Film As 'Fun, Watchable'
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Make it so, JJ Abrams.
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I want to see the end credits now, I was wondering if they even included the original theme song.
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And also, BALLS!
Seriously, I'm interested in seeing how good Eomer's impersonation of Bones is...I see he hasn't picked up DeForest's rather weird trait of wearing a banana around his neck all the time... -
Calling that right now...
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although I hear DeForest did like to go out draped in fresh fruit on occasion.
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I'm even more exited—The new tv spots look excellent.
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I've never been a fan of Star Trek, but this I REALLY want to see.
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not gonna read it.
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Cannot wait! I've been waiting for a kickass Trek film for years (First Contact came close, but not since Wrath of Khan...) Bring on the new 'verse!
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Does that mean that Bana is overacting and the villain of this movie is as annoying and non-threatening like Tommy Lee Jones in Batman Forever or Wesley Snipes in Demolition Man?
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May 05, 2009 5:30:09 PM CDT
15.) Did we mention set visits already..oh yeah..sorry
by glory_fades_immaxfischer
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just sayin...
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May 05, 2009 5:30:32 PM CDT
16.) AICN got into the free screening..unlike those fox assholes
by glory_fades_immaxfischer
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May 05, 2009 5:31:29 PM CDT
17.) We're required to mention Star Trek in every article..per J
by glory_fades_immaxfischer
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That's okay—it's coming from an objective place, I hope?
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May 05, 2009 5:32:27 PM CDT
18.) We got lots of free goodies from the premiere
by glory_fades_immaxfischer
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This is the big money movie of the year. Is it Dark Knight big? I sure hope so. As a massive trek fan there is very little i've seen so far to turn me off of this. It's probabley one of the few things coming out this summer season i'm excited for. Wolverine was an absolute waste of money and Transformers doesn't look much better. Should an Uhura nipple slip occur, this could be the biggest of all time
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was posted. Thanks AICN
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May 05, 2009 5:33:04 PM CDT
19.) JJ promised us more set visits on his future films
by glory_fades_immaxfischer
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What I love is that know virtually nothing about this film. I've read every review and patch of invisotext on this site, and I feel I know only about 25% of the shitstorm that's going to unload on me Thursday night at 7pm. And it's nice to see that. Too many trailers give you everything that's good about the film and leave you the surprise of finding the remaining excrement not shown wasn't worth showing. Like "Indiana Jones and the Abortion Clinic of the Crystal Skull".
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May 05, 2009 5:34:45 PM CDT
21.) JJ's dick tastes like strawberries..trust us..we know
by glory_fades_immaxfischer
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May 05, 2009 5:35:00 PM CDT
WELL SEE, WON'T WE? WE WILL! YEAH! OH YEAH! AAARRRGGHHH! ALRIGHT
by returnofthecreepythinman
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BIG GREEN ONES
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May 05, 2009 5:35:45 PM CDT
22.) The bridge looks like an Apple store..everyone loves that
by glory_fades_immaxfischer
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May 05, 2009 5:36:16 PM CDT
23.) Don't forget to buy the comic we have plastered all over th
by glory_fades_immaxfischer
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How's the action? I really liked MI3, but I thought (other than the sequence on the highway) a lot of the action was awkward and anticlimactic, especially the big fight at the end. Thoughts?
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May 05, 2009 5:38:16 PM CDT
This is first great big-screen effort from J.J. Abrams
by outlawsdelejos
So MI:3 never happened?
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May 05, 2009 5:38:41 PM CDT
24.) Don't forget about that score promo we're running
by glory_fades_immaxfischer
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May 05, 2009 5:41:40 PM CDT
26.) Nothing's more embarrassing than a movie geek site conspira
by spamgelus
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May 05, 2009 5:44:21 PM CDT
28.) JJ's the only person left that gives us exclusives
by glory_fades_immaxfischer
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Lol.
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the kirk-robocop chase is one of the coolest action scenes I've ever seen.
Glory_Fades_ImMaxFischer: I dare you -- I double DOG dare you -- to stay away from this movie. -
Do you guys on this site not get tired of having JJ Abrams cum shot all over your ice cream?
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ok..lol...believe it or not Herc..not everyone gives as big as shit about this movie as AICN would try to convince people otherwise to believe (see WOLVERINE'S numbers)..of course I also go to movies for reasons other than JJ Abram's tablescraps and what was it you called it.."hottitude"?...nice to see your constant ass kissing of Abrams is taking you places though..must be exciting
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bring it the fuck on, jj.
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May 05, 2009 5:57:20 PM CDT
30.) We'll do anything to help this outgross our XO embarrassmen
by glory_fades_immaxfischer
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will make your anus leak when you're in old age.
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May 05, 2009 5:58:44 PM CDT
31.) AICN sponsored screenings..so naturally..5 stars
by glory_fades_immaxfischer
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AICN hated JJ when he wrote the Superman script, but they're obviously in his pocket for Star Trek and (first season) LOST. Can't have anything to do with actual quality, can it?
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May 05, 2009 5:59:59 PM CDT
32.) no picture of paid reciept..thanks again JJ
by glory_fades_immaxfischer
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You're so angry. It's kinda cute, in a really pathetic way. How little you must be. Go drink some warm milk and take a nappums, sweetie.
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Since when did AICN start reviewing films on quality? lol.
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Now thanks to AISTN, we now know that he loves to have his cock by film geeks too.
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I don't get where all the hates coming from.
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Not my fault AICN sold out its cred..just sayin.
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Now thanks to AISTN, we now know that he loves to have his cock sucked by film geeks too.
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Someone in the movie? Surely he's not (mistakenly) referring to a young Picard?
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--sad I know how to spell 'Tholian'. I'll recoup my cred by intoning: MIKEY BAY NEEDS TO DIRECT THE SEQUEL 'STAR DREK TOO: WHO'S ON FURST' WHERE FLOUNDER WINDS UP CAST AS THE PLANET FLACCIDUS AND BEGINS TO EAT ROMULONS. BURT REYNOLDS CGI FEATURED ROLE TO FOLLOW. FULL DISCLOSURE--DAN SHAUGHNESSY AND JJ ABRAMS ARE LOVERS.
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strike me as the kind who would deliberately write and publish a negative review of Trek, blind, just because they're enraged that it's at a 100% on rotten tomatoes. The evident success and acclaim of this movie is somehow personally angering them.
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..But goddamnit so what! Its so funny and it's because of him..(slurp slurp)
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May 05, 2009 6:14:44 PM CDT
I dunno GloryFades AICN had a shiton of Wolverine stories too
by d.vader
And look how that turned out.
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Dunno how that cameout so wrong.
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They're called "trolls" Toonal. They get cranky when mommy internet pays more attention to a movie than to them.
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I know its not Trek but
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I know its not Trek but
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I know its not Trek but
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I know its not Trek but
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I know its not Trek but
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that was fucking brilliant.
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May 05, 2009 6:20:38 PM CDT
I wonder if this site will show just 1 shiton Trek story
by glory_fades_immaxfischer
doubtful
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Have fun at the movies this weekend with "Next Day Air." HAHAHAHA
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you mean there are other movies opening this weekend besided Star Trek? I only get my cool news here so I didn't even know there were any other movies..maybe I'll check it out..thanks
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May 05, 2009 6:30:09 PM CDT
detectives... Detectives... DETEECCTIIVVESSSSS!!!!!!!SSS!!!!!
by kjmad25
Star Trek will be awesome
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I dug this alot.
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im soory, not trying to be mean, but someone else pointed it out to me, now thats all i see when i look at his face
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JJ Abrams is a penis. Just a massive dick!
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Awww, honey, I know you're trying to do the right thing by pointing out the evils of big, bad AICN. And daddy's proud of you. But I think you have to ask yourself a big boy question- if, like you said, it's, "Not my fault AICN sold out its cred..just sayin," and all that, then why do you still come here? Is it because you're trying to be like the valiant knight in your favorite bedtime story and free all the poor, defenseless talkbackers from the evil Ain't It Cool Witch? That's my big buddy! But, son, sometimes doing all that stuff just makes you look like a wittle-bitty-douchebag wif a wittle-bitty-peepee. Now say goodnight to all the peoples and go to bed.
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jesus, it's spelled "predator"...if you're going to try to get people to your loser site, at least SPELL shit properly. no one's going to go to your site if you can't spell a simple movie title properly. how bad must the writing be if "predator" threw you off? didn't you see the little red line underneath your fuckup OVER AND OVER? fuck, the trolls aren't even trying anymore...
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May 05, 2009 6:43:03 PM CDT
"a guy I’ve been calling a genius since the “Felicity” pilot."
by conspiracy
Need we say more? Geekasmic brown nosing 1, Objectivity 0.Also..nothing pulls you out of a scene supposedly set in the 23rd century like a 20th/21st century rock song.Also...if they are nothing at all like Kirk, SPock, Bones, et all.....why name them thus? Why screw with what was? Why not just call this Star Trek: The New Guys?I'l;l give it a chance...but I'm watching it from Piratebay before I actually spend $$$ on anything from Abrams, Orci and Kurtzman
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Please speak up if you know this, I need to buys tickets like ................... NOW
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Feels weird!
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JJ was on The Daily Show last night, does that mean Jon Stewart has sold out?fuck you're an idiot. this movie is RIGHT UP this site's alley, as well as most of the VISITORS to this site. look at this talkback, 90% of the people here are excited about this movie, and the other 10% is you yelling nonsense over and over.stop fucking whining, it's pathetic. set visits, interviews, these are all part of the job of having a popular movie news website. this is a huge movie, AND it's a geek movie, so why shouldn't it have a lot of coverage?and if it bothers you SO GODDAMN MUCH, why did you click on the link and read the article? just skip it.but honestly, if reading a movie review on a movie review website bothers you so fucking much, maybe you shouldn't come here at all.no one will miss you, kiddo.
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Not true IMAX. Converted.
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Herc you are a heartless bastard.
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Hey Douchebag aicn is not the only site that's giving good reviews to Star Trek . Currently at 100% at 30 reviews on Rt sure it will change but I doubt by much and 89 on meta not a negative review in the lot Do a little research before spouting your bullshit .If you want to see negative go to chud Faraci has been understandably negative up until recently when he said he enjoyed it. God forbid a website built by geeks for geeks have star trek news and reviews
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I'll catch it on reg screen.
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i'm missing something here..does picard show up in this as a prequel baby or something? who the hell is herc talking about?
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Imagine that ...
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Quarter-finalists to be revealed tonight.
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May 05, 2009 6:59:18 PM CDT
I DON'T KNOW WHO THAT BALD SECURITY OFFICER IS EITHER
by bringingsexyback
But anyone who laughs at the extinction of whales, and the attempted harpooning of George and Gracey is not someone I want to understand.
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AICN gives JJ's nose on imax 5 stars..Sexy's right
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May 05, 2009 7:02:28 PM CDT
SORRY, FORGOT THE RESULTS SHOW DON'T START UNTIL 9PM
by bringingsexyback
Sadly, I think it will be cowboy Ty Murray going home. I will miss his humor and charm.
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I think without that potential for fan outrage, they would've never tried as hard as they apparently did to keep Trek Begins true to canon. Even amateurs can have flashes of inspired professionalism, and I'm hoping this is true of ST. I want to have a good time Friday.
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got me there BSB
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We need one! God knows we need to watch the Coast Guard fly out fifty times in an hour.
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Mott?!
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just kidding. although...
gonna go watch this on Saturday, it's gonna be a bitch avoiding all the spoilers until then. -
Even if the movie is universally praised "Star Trek" still has too much cult stigma to ever be a monstrous success. The 18+ crowd may eat it up but I can't see this appealing to kids or anyone over 50. You can't get to Star Wars/Superhero movie like numbers without those categories.
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May 05, 2009 7:31:09 PM CDT
SPEAKING OF NOSES ... JACK BAUER BROKE ONE FOR REALZ!
by bringingsexyback
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/05/05/kiefer-sutherland-headbut_n_196881.html Kiefer Sutherland was all smiles on the Met red carpet Monday night, but according to one report he broke a designer's nose hours later at an after party.
According to the New York nightlife website Guest of a Guest, which says it has three separate confirmations of the incident:
Apparently Keither [sic] Sutherland HEAD BUTTED Jack McCollough so hard that he BROKE the designer's nose!
While guests like Mary-Kate Olsen, and Kirsten Dunst looked on, the actor apparently was upset over Brooke Shields.
McCollough is one half of design duo Proenza Schouler and as of noon, says Guest of a Guest, was still in the hospital. Sutherland, 42, and Shields, 43, go way back, having costarred together in 1996's "Freeway."
Hopefully more details will be forthcoming.
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You can tell Urban watched alot of the old eps in preparation. That picture with McCoy behind Kirk on the bridge is a classic McCoy/Deforest pose. Perfect. Cheers to you, Urban.
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Sulu would fuck him up royally if they had lived in the same timeline ...
"Christianity Today: In the last month, same-sex marriage has become legal in Iowa and Vermont. What do you think about same-sex marriage at a state level?
Wurzelbacher: At a state level, it's up to them. I don't want it to be a federal thing. I personally still think it's wrong. People don't understand the dictionary--it's called queer. Queer means strange and unusual. It's not like a slur, like you would call a white person a honky or something like that. You know, God is pretty explicit in what we're supposed to do--what man and woman are for. Now, at the same time, we're supposed to love everybody and accept people, and preach against the sins. I've had some friends that are actually homosexual. And, I mean, they know where I stand, and they know that I wouldn't have them anywhere near my children. But at the same time, they're people, and they're going to do their thing.
In the vein of George W. Bush and Michael Steele, Joe the Plumber also indicated that he wouldn't run for public office until the Lord had given him a cue. "God hasn't said, 'Joe, I want you to run.' I feel more important to just encourage people to get involved, one way or another. If I can inspire some leaders, that would be great." Joe added: "I don't know if I want to be a leader."
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He'd punch you in the face, if he didn't like someones tie.
Bale on the other hand, would just punch them for a laugh. -
One of the most earnest actors I've seen. Hope this leads to many great roles for him.
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Then Lord Bale can laugh and laugh
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Which is as farthest from rotten as it gets. :)
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The moment he says something sensical, he's done.
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You Bet your Transporter ass!
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of the original cast? Spock is supposed to have a deep voice and Kirk is supposed to have a gut and Sulu is supposed to be gay and Uhuru is supposed to be hideous!
Oh well, at least I have my flying car and bodacious sexbot to comfort me. -
than this film, already does.
I want to see Bones fucking Scotty, against his beloved warp core.
Or carry on this films Spock & Uhura loveathon. And have Spock/Uhura fucking, then Kirk appears and starts fucking Spock. -
its not asskissing if its a fact. the film is actually good and does what its supposed to do...give us a reason to care about TREK again..stop trying to play devils advocate dude...wolverine will be on blu ray soon enough for you okay so you dont have to leave mommy womb
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Like the DS9 Tribble episode.
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May 05, 2009 8:30:05 PM CDT
oh shit I just saw that my muti post was included above
by doctorzoidberg
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I guess the difference all comes down to facial hair/no facial hair, right?
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May 05, 2009 8:45:48 PM CDT
This site fucking destroys my desire to see films.
by dannyglovers_dickblood
I have tickets for Thursday night....but fuck me am I losing interest. PLEASE STOP WITH THE FUCKING STAR TREK REVIEWS.FUCK.
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dont worry itll be good. trying not to oversell but itll be good. Benjamin Button good.
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And Wolverine 2 is already fast -traced...hahahahaha. If this site pumps up Star Trek 90210 anymore it might explode...Do I still have to wear my pocket protector and jean shorts this weekend when i go see this???
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Heath Ledger in TDK inspired him? Uhhhhhh....what the fuck? So any non-American playing American is suddenly trying to be just like Heath? What the fuck?And that looks like he wears a forehead appliance to me.
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May 05, 2009 8:52:25 PM CDT
I do think it will be good. But FUCK does AICN piss on my hype.
by dannyglovers_dickblood
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is a tat i believe
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if not oh well. I do believe you like Speed Racer and Rocketeer right? Not the most critically adored films but they do hold a special place. so fuck the hype and critics and enjoy. cheers
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May 05, 2009 8:55:39 PM CDT
It is a strange texture and unnatural looking.
by dannyglovers_dickblood
It is some sort of appliance. Obviously not a Klingon ribbed shit for her pleasure....but there is something on him.
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I bet a shitload of cash Bana didn't give A FUCK about channeling Ledger...Let me channel a fuckin loser who committed suicide and left a precious little girl fatherless.
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I bet a shitload of cash Bana didn't give A FUCK about channeling Ledger...Let me channel a fuckin loser who committed suicide and left a precious little girl fatherless.
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May 05, 2009 8:58:59 PM CDT
I agree. I can give a fuck about reviews or critic opinions.
by dannyglovers_dickblood
I'm just saying it always gets annoying as fuck when 30 reviews that say the exact same fucking thing are posted. Its just a waste of bandwidth IMO. Speed Racer and Rocketeer. Indeed. Speed is shit on, but Rocketeer gets love around here. I also love Mann's Miami Vice, which is always a fun one to argue.
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Caught that shitstorm on cable recently. Cripes was it fucking boring too! Terrible fucking narrative. It was just a mess.
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.....if I see another Star Trek review on AICN, I'm gonna take a baseball bat to it's fucking mouth.
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Like everyone, I thought for sure Ty was getting sent home but it turned out to be Lil Kim!!! The audience was stunned. I couldn't breathe for a second. I love Ty, would've hated to see him go, but Lil' Kim has been on fire all season long. She DESERVED to go to the semi-finals. This is unbelievable. I'm still reeling!
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Sho'nuff!!! and a Klingon Cloverfield monster...and a shaky hand held cam.
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I heard Star Trek was pretty good!
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...if this movie turns out to suck....or even be just average...I am going to start leaning toward the "conspiracy theorists AICN sold out" crowd just a little. But my hopes soar high....
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And then Spock can tap Derek Hough...think of the possibilites JJ
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May 05, 2009 9:13:42 PM CDT
LIL' KIM?!!! YOU JUST FUCKING RUINED IT BSB!!! FUCK!!!!
by dannyglovers_dickblood
I'm West Coast. GOD DAMN. As long as Shawn Johnson's fine muscular ass sashays into the finals....
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Thank Christ I don't have to see that fucker's hair anymore. Somebody needs to scalp him on live Iranian television.
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Poor Lil' Kim! Just goes to show - you GOT TO VOTE.
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More like a nonja. Shame what passes for a ninja nowadays. Only part of Speed Racer I've seen so far.
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Sorry I didn't post a spoiler warning I'm in a state of shock ...
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May 05, 2009 9:16:29 PM CDT
Lil' Kim looks like Michael Jackson sorta.....
by dannyglovers_dickblood
...what the fuck happened to her face?
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She gives me naughty thoughts!
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The references to this film being funny worry me a bit. I know it's all relative, but STNG in particular, had a few moments (with Data mostly) that were, granted, loveably cute...but when he started dressing up like Sherlock Holmes or whatever, well, that just took it too far. (Though that one episode wehere a holo-deck Moriority convinced everyone that he had become a real person even though it turned out that he had just taken over the holo-deck program is still one of my favs from any of the series!)
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EMILE HIRSCH FOR CONGRESS!!
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She's a sweetie, but you're right she's Michael/Janet-looking. She doesn't need that, she has a heart of gold.
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you actually thought ty WASNT going home? people vote for him cause hes the underdo. the black folk (does that sound racist?) tuned out when LT went golfing. besides, Kim was getting whiter every week. the fuck that about??
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Which means disappointment is inevitable. Thanks a LOT.
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when it debuted in 91, thought it was the best comic book film. hold up well. miss you joe J.
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eye crack. masterpiece. my son loved it.
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He was at the bottom by like, what, 15-20 points. And I think Lil Kim was top 2 last night. This is nuts.
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'Cuz this one is one of the pod people ;)
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Were Jennifer's boobs still big in it?
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will be arrested for assault and battery.
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Seriously. Fuck you up your stupid asses. Reality tv does not exist in this dojo. And oh yes, BRINGINGSEXYBACK, Jenniger Connolly still had The Cans in "The Rocketeer".
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http://tinyurl.com/d6dc7c
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Thanks fellas
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May 05, 2009 9:29:48 PM CDT
Joe Johnston knows what he wants....BIG FUCKING TITS.
by dannyglovers_dickblood
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It's only temporary insanity - Monday and Tuesday nights.
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And reality TV shouldn't exist, PERIOD, END OF SENTENCE.
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myself. Speed Racer was interesting. I thought it was fun, and somewhat unfairly shat upon, but I also can see why it bombed. It was just too much like anime for a mainstream audiance imho. Most people still have ahard time with Anime in my experiance
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But next time, not in a Star Trek talkback, OK? :)
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interested in the new trek. Are you a fan? Or are you a JJ fan? Just wondering becos I have never really got the impression you are a big Sci-fi action fan...
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imho....and the only good period super hero movie too as far as im concerned...
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15th May release in China, time for copies on the Internet, studios want to increase your profits and reduce piracy, worldwide fucking releases
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Locke is in it as Howard Hughes.
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I think Star Trek is dorky as shit. And I've never really found any of it entertaining. I find the original series to be half hilarious/half dreadful. And Next Generation was fun because I sat there playing out inner fantasies of stomping that bearded prick in the fucking face. Other than that....the movies? Uhhhh no fucking thanks. Horrible horrible shit. All of it. Though I have never seen Khan.
Abrams entertains me, I did the cast, and the trailers grabbed me by the fucking nuts.....so I'm in. -
Made even funnier( and truer) after the Harry didn't get a free ticket to Wolvie debacle. We learnt a lot about Harry from that and given his lack of pride,determination etc, can see how he became so obese.
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And the aliens are shitty on that show. At least Trek has cool aliens.
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May 05, 2009 9:47:53 PM CDT
lockebrokenleg was that a personal invite to a particular troll
by miyamoto_musashi
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Man that chick is gorgeous.
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While we complain about it at times, it does bring some great unintentional humour, like "shiton" or "did the cast"
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The Klingon theme that dates as far back as good ol' TMP?
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How anyone can deny that is unfuckingbelievable.
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Did you just land on Earth yesterday? The hell?
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Korea:) just another way Korea beats Japan lol..
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should watch it. has an excellent James Horner score (as does Rocketeer) before he started ripping himself off. Best shat acting too. Period piece JC in rocketeer sublime! sublime brests.
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May 05, 2009 9:55:32 PM CDT
That Star Wars inspired snow lizard thing on Hoth....
by dannyglovers_dickblood
....while Kirk is running away looks to be the best designed alien in the Trek universe. But I suppose it doesn't count to the religious Trek followers since this is an alternate far better looking timeline.
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im an idiot
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May 05, 2009 9:56:38 PM CDT
I believe I've seen 6 Trek films. And that was enough...
by dannyglovers_dickblood
....I would like to see Khan eventually, it does look and sound good-- but FUCK. Its hard to force yourself to sit through another one after the hours of my life wasted on that dreadful shit.
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May 05, 2009 9:57:10 PM CDT
BSB-- I would ask you the same with Rocketeer.
by dannyglovers_dickblood
I think you're seriously one of the only people I've met/talked to that hasn't seen it.
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that just happened
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quite bad, but ive always seen that as part of trek's charm if you will....Dude if its true you have never seen WOK, get off your ass and see it stat! Ive been told Bale commands it.....just sayin...
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1-skip 2-watch 3-meh 4-WAS ok when i was a kid 5-corny 6-yep 7-eh 8-best TNG 9-nope 10-cant remember
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to see my very late response to your sex in South Africa question which I did not see during our back and forth yesterday....
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Granted, I haven't seen "Khan" all the way through since I was a small child. Plus we get that hot shape-shifter in Part VI.
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But they are just so fucking old and dull. And how anyone takes Shat as a bad ass is beyond me. I could punch a hole in that fucking dwarf's face. For the record...I do like Shats. Its just ridiculous.
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http://www.hulu.com/watch/2344 /saturday-night-live-carson-anniversary-cold-open
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That's like hearing some of my friends grew up on the 80s but never saw The Goonies or Back to the Future. Seriously, what were you DOING as a kid?
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there is a reason that film is legend...you do owe it to yourself to see it Danny. if you think it sucked, then what is 2 more hours when youve seen 6 films you thought bordering mediocrity? Watch it
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You need to see Khan. If not for Montalban's fine performance, and some background on the Kobayashi Maru before heading in to the new ST this week.
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change your mind/interest in something? Just curious becos of you not being a fan of trek, and not really liking the movies etc.., but the trailer was able to sell you on it? Im just really interested in how this movie is playing to non-trekkies...
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Direct hit and lights out! Put on your corpsicle gloves and prepare to board, red-shirts.
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THIS IS CETI ALPHA 5!!!!!!
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What can I say, I was amateur!
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bringing Khan and some PBR. be there in about 15 hours
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See it now!
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I'm talking now goddamit!!!! Go to Blockbuster for Bale's sake.
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See Rocketeer Now!
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hopefully the PBR will last
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May 05, 2009 10:12:06 PM CDT
Danny agree re Trek aliens - but who does them well
by miyamoto_musashi
In most tv or movie sci-fi they are all so homogenous (think I spelt it right), look at all the diversity that exists in humans. Huge fan of B5 but not much different either.
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Eeep op ork ah ah!!!!
Eeep op ork ah ah!!!!
Eeep op ork ah ah!!!!
Eeep op ork ah ah!!!!
BAAHAHAHHHAHAHAHAA!!!!! -
...bring Khan, pizza, and an 8-ball. We'll be up until the Trek midnight showing.
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No watch instantly function, unfortunately.
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Talkbackers gather, get drunk, go crazy, go to Trek screening, and fucking own.
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khan cannot be contained to watch instantly. you should know better
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Stop Hating on Indy 4. It's damn fine film and doesn't deserve the OVER negativity. And yes, the movie was very exciting. While the screenplay was flawed it had great and well executed set pieces and overall achieved a lot more than could have been done considering Ford's age. It's a good movie that suffers from idiotic expectations of people.
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May 05, 2009 10:15:54 PM CDT
Yeah...I dunno. What films have the best alien species?
by dannyglovers_dickblood
I guess it is Wars. What the fuck comes close?
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Greeeeeen Acres is the place to be! Faaaaarm living is the life for me!
Laaaand stretching out so far and wiiide. Keep Manhattan just give me that countryside!
Nyoo York is where I'd rather stay! I get allergic smelling hay! I just adore a penthouse view! darling I love but give me park avenue! -
I am so glad Shia's not in ST.
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The entire Internets would be jammed by Khan viewership.
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We are engaged in Psy ops combat!!!
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Will have to try Korea soon, perhaps a visit without the wife, off to Taiwan for a boys weekend in a couple of weeks, always fun
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/aliens, the predators,...and ..uh i guess SW. Fuck there really have nt been many truly well done aliens on film...
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TERMINATOR, HARRY POTTER, WOLVERINE, TRANSFORMERS all have much bigger fanbases. The STAR TREK brand still carries a nerdy, sexless connotation. A reboot, no matter how cool or modernized, will NOT do huge mainstream numbers. Mark my words, this is another WATCHMEN.
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Do not bring INDY IV into this dojo. I have spilt enough blood over that AIDS ravaged whore of a film.
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Sorry, couldn't help myself.
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Wolverine won't heal from the raping it gets from ST.
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...I was thinking more like the best population of diverse aliens in a film or franchise, not a single species.
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aliens with civilizationas as such right, not really creatures like the xenomorph...
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May 05, 2009 10:26:49 PM CDT
Wolverine Rape = ADMANTIUM FIST ON BIFF'S CANE?
by dannyglovers_dickblood
Hhhhmmmmm. White Vader. Perhaps.
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May 05, 2009 10:27:49 PM CDT
Yeah I don't think anything is as big and diverse as SW....
by dannyglovers_dickblood
....population of species. I really like the Fifth Element species as well, but there are only a few.
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re hating on Indy 4, think it's perfectly acceptable it's a property that we cared about that wasn't well delivered, we didn't expect Godfather part 2 quality
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Gotta go to bed now - just wanted to leave you with this little ditty.
There's a town I know where the people all go it's called Bedrock! Twist twist! -
I like Star Trek when it's worth suspending disbelief, not if I have to pretend I fit the IQ 80 demographic.
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I think Star Wars is the milestone for creative, diverse alien designs. I mean shit, Return of the Jedi had that bizarre B'Omarr Monk! An alien species that puts its brain in a fishbowl head of a robotic spider body as some sort of religious fetish.
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Word of mouth alone is stoking the fire. If it really delivers, then only Transformers will be able to catch it.
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Yabba dabba
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May 05, 2009 10:34:07 PM CDT
Thanks BSB but think my use of "boys weekend" is a little differ
by miyamoto_musashi
But each to their own
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are you serious? this has a built-in nerd fan base, it's not r-rated, it's shiny and exciting for the kiddies, it's not THAT long, and it's up against virtually NOTHING.it may not have as big an opening as Wolverine, but it'll be damn close. and worldwide it'll be bigger.
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I also think WOLVERINE was weak, and I'm willing to bet STAR TREK will be a better movie in just about every dept. I'm just trying to remind some of the fanboys that geeks can't buy $300 million worth of tickets alone. The STAR TREK franchise has never, and probably will never, bring in much general public EXCEPT for fanboys. It comes down to this, my girlfriend and most of my buddies' girlfriends want to see WOLVERINE, TRANSFORMERS, even TERMINATOR. STAR TREK would be a very hard sell
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DGDB we expect a report on Khan by tomorrow. Ahead warp factor 12!
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May 05, 2009 10:36:42 PM CDT
Apparently the B'Omarrs forced a few of Jabba's servants to join
by d.vader
Reading some history on the B'Omarr Monks, apparently after Jabba died in Return of the Jedi, some of the B'omarrs reclaimed their temple (That was Jabba's palace) and forced Bib Fortuna and some of the other aliens in Jabba's coterie to remove their brains and have them placed in the spider droid body. That's just... morbid. And man, did I just take my geekery to a new level with that one.
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i live just outside Seoul....Im not crazy about Tokyo, bit I love Osaka...
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trek still has a really big stigma about it, its not an easy sell...
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May 05, 2009 10:41:05 PM CDT
D Vader - Star Wars has a diverse range but like most scifi
by miyamoto_musashi
Doesn't have much diversity within a species. They all dress the same, they all sound the same, they all have the same beliefs. Kind of like how the Germans and Japanese were portrayed in WW2 movies. Think it's human nature to think of "outsiders" as all being the same.
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I agree. This movie rocked. I should be royally pissed at some of the things it did, but it works, and works well. I have only very minor quibbles. Basically, some actors need to grow a bit in the role. There was one nit I'll pick in a bit. The bottom line is that the movie works. And it works within the existing Trek universe. You have a lot of questions about the future...but I need to see the next one now. I think Abrams deserves credit for making an odd-numbered movie rock this world.
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But then who knows, the aliens probably think all humans look the same too. I've seen plenty of alien designs where the alien is dressed in the attire of something a human would wear (such as a spacesuit, or the smuggling outfit Han Solo wore). But for the purposes of background visuals, it helps to have aliens If you start having aliens of the same species dress in different ways, as if from different cultures, if the differences are on separate ends of a spectrum, subconsciously the viewer will probably think the costumer got lazy and didn't think things though: they just threw some costumes on the aliens without regard to their species' culture. KWIS? Or was that reaaaaalllly confusing.
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what you're not taking into account is that this movie has gotten UNIVERSALLY great reviews. you can't underestimate how big an impact that will have.not to mention the HUGE marketing push. fuck, it's even all over Burger King.this is going to be huge, believe it.
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diverse and better designed, You have to admit that they have no depth though, there is no exploration or understanding provided to their civilizations etc...they are purely visual. While each alien race in trek (even being that they all just have different bumps on their heads and noses) has a distinctive character, type of culture/civilization etc...so in that respect I personally prefer the trek aliens...
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"But for the purposes of background visuals, it helps to have aliens..." It helps to have aliens dress in similar attire.
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"An alien species that puts its brain in a fishbowl head of a robotic spider body as some sort of religious fetish".
WTF? I must have been sleeping through that part of ROTJ.
southafricanguy/Miyamoto_Musashi, Korea's great for an extended drinking session, if you don't take the missus that is. Great people, lively place to party & cheap beers!
It takes a bit of getting used to for some though. A guy I know flew over there from Japan a few weeks back. I forget his exact words, but they were something like "The weather's shit, the food's shit & the women look like fire damaged lego". No pleasing some people.
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May 05, 2009 10:47:55 PM CDT
WATCHMEN was also pushed by the site and it bombed
by professor_monster
Usually when this site gets behind a movie - Watchmen, Snakes on a Plane, Episode 1-3, Grindhouse - the movie usually sucks and doesn't make anywhere NEAR what the people here think.
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And that's thanks in large part to the comics, books, and non-film related media that is the Star Wars universe. Many of the aliens in Star Wars were designed with specific cultural identities in mind, though they are hardly ever explored in the films (because they are often just there in the background). Trek, on the other hand, puts most alien species at the forefront, as each episode was about exploring this new culture. SW was never about meeting and getting to know new alien life, and therefore we don't get to know much about how they live (aside from, like I said, a handful of species: the Hutts, for instance, are gangsters, the Wookiees are warriors, Bothans are very good spies). BUT, if you explore a lot of these SW aliens online, you'll find that many have a very rich history.
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Live in Tokyo, amazing city, have a pretty good life here, but work in Roppongi Hills , so not real Japan, would love to live in Kyoto, Kansai people are a bit friendler and Tokyo can get a little crazy, but in my industry no real jobs there
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thanks South African, STIGMA is exactly the word I was looking for. I mean, come on guys, we're all fanboys, but STAR TREK has a huge geeky stigma. I know a LOT of people who have NEVER watched a complete TREK episode or movie, but they're very quick to say, "No, I dont like Star Trek." A lot of the mass audience has already written this movie off on name alone.
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http://tinyurl.com/dm7vz4
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You don't wanna party in North Korea. Unless you want a communist party. Or a search party:-).
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Wehn 3PO and R2 first go into Jabba's palace and the big gate is closing, and 3PO is freaking out around the Gomorrean guards, you can see a B'omarr Monk in its spider-droid body walking by in the background (with the gate behind that, if my memory is correct). I first learned of its history (as a religious order that removed their brains on the path to enlightenment) as a kid when the B'omarr Monk was a special mailaway figure. That's a bizarre fictional history for a species, though, no? But upon further research, it seems though the B'omarrs may have been a specific species at first, they were largely a religious order, and thus any alien could join. And have their brains removed to be place into fishbowl headed spider-droids.
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http://tinyurl.com/ch5nhl Did I just hijack a Trek story and turn it into a Star Wars thread? Fuck yeah I did!
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I don't know how you can live in Tokyo. I'm down south in Fukuoka & I can't stand Tokyo after living here. It's like any capital, the people are too wrapped up in themselves. & Roppongi Hills is a fucking awful place. I certainly couldn't work in Tokyo. The commuting alone would tire me out.
Now Kyoto! That's the place to be! Not many jobs there though. You wanna try Fukuoka City! Imagine a big city, except people are friendly & everything's relaxed. -
When I was a kid we had a Japanese exchange student staying with us ( in Australia), one day at school she was bullied, my dad asked her what the kid looked like, her answer " I don't know you all look the same"
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http://tinyurl.com/ddtcaz
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only referring to aliens on film.
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Looks cool though. Removing their brains on the path to enlightenment sounds pretty fucked up.
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not been to Fukuoka, but you just described Osaka beautifully...now thats the real Japan to me....
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to see how this movie does. It's finally possible for people with NO prior experience with Star Trek to go see and enjoy a Star Trek movie. If anything can make Star Trek cool for the average viewer it's this movie. The only people hating on this are continuity nerds who want Trek to stay their private cult instead of the pop culture juggernaut it always could have been given the right support.
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Fucking white people.
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May 05, 2009 11:01:16 PM CDT
oops..again..spoilers beware...response to invisotext..
by captain_kirk
*I agree the 25 year thing is odd. What is more odd is that he didn't age one bit. Granted that's not such a problem. Romulans and Vulcans and all. There was the attack on Klingon which Uhura overheard. We never see what happened. For me the implication was that maybe klingon finally joined the federation, but who knows? I guess it's a big question. Especially since he waits 25 years to destroy that planet while you know who watches. why not do it sooner? Of course, he couldn't kill Spock Jr...would have created a paradox or what-not. I figured he probably just went a-mining. OR.... He could create black holes at will and travel through time to specific points in time. My bigger question is how easy it was to find spock. It's also interesting that if he waited 25 years for spock to show up, that means Kirk is 25, maybe 26 when he becomes Capn---- a full 8 years ahead of his scheduled timeline. That being said, things changed, and this point in federation history was always a bit of a frontier.
* Yeah it was convenient to find spock. At first I thought spock might have known from experience/etc. I'm not convinced he didn't play some unseen role. The bigger kwinky dink was scotty.
* Spock Prime concealing his presence: truthfully, the right thing to do. The bigger question: why tell Spock Jr at all? Also, what is spock's role in rebuilding that planet?? is he revealing himself to others?
* the giant monster thing: one of several instances where kirk cheats death. where he has fear. Yes, it's been done before, but as u note, it's a plot device.
* Montgomery Scott’s introduction to the Enterprise: actually, i loved it. A transporter error. It was funny.
* As to chekov: it is interesting that he shows up in so early. A year earlier, although many have posited that he was on the ship even though he went unseen. Problematic, yes. But so what? It seems to me that the "meteoric" rise was also in part a result of a dramatically changed timeline. IE, it was necessary.
Here's one other plot nit to pick: when Spock Jr flies the spaceship, 2 possible errors: first, apparently a vulcan ship has majel barrett's voice. Secondly, it calculates time in human earth years, not star dates. -
Most of that region's great, Osaka, Kyoto, Kobe etc. Personally though, I find the further south you go, the more relaxed Japan is. I go to Tokyo for weekend breaks & I usually come back exhausted!
The countryside's great down here too! I mean actual countryside, not the shit that people in the bigger cities call countryside, which tends to look like something out of Robocop:-). -
about Korean women? Sorry, but i have been to many countries and i have never seen as many sexy/attractive women (hot bodies, pretty, wearing tight/skimpy clothes) as i have here in Korea
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The Twilek girl at the opera. Seen in Ep.III Revenge of the Sith. http://tinyurl.com/dzyv4s Couldn't find a screen cap, but she shows off some *great* side-boob in her brief moment on celluloid.
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It's true. Not just looks, but nationalities. People usually assume I'm American. When I tell them I'm Briitsh, they say "Yeah, but it's the same thing." Not really, no.
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there were also 2 product plugs (something that never happened in trek).
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And they are excited to see the new movie. And they're confused about how that makes them feel.
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maybe cameron won't be a dick on the bridge of the enterprise B. Maybe, too, kirk won't get into the nexus and die in a friggin collapsed bridge.
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I'm right with you there! Hot food, hot women. Fucking great place. Wait 'til summer kicks in the little shorts come out he he!
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I just wish it didn't have a Muppet Babies feel to it. One of the things I appreciate about the old movies is that while Kirk et al, were undoubtedly badass, there was a mature, serenity about the characters that was cool. Kirk especially was nothinbg like the guy in the series. He was a man who'd lived & seen stuff. If that makes sense?
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those tight shorts with the bobby socks, and useally always with 6-9 inch heels. Its like a country of porn stars....
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well you know what im talking about...lol
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I might have missed some messages. Do you live in Korea or just visiting?
The last time I went to Korea from Fukuoka, I'm sure it only took me about an hour & a half or something. That's another reason I like it here, it's a gateway to other places. Even the culture's kinda affected by places like Korea & China. The further south you go, the more exotic it gets. -
Have been in Fukuoka for the two day festival, and just spent a day in Nagasaki, both fun places and my wife and I noticed the Hakata bijin , what job are u doing now ?
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May 05, 2009 11:17:06 PM CDT
Wolverine was a turdtacular piece of shit. Trek isn't. Suck it u
by g100
They could greenlight Wolverine for a 12 Movie franchise somehow have a 500 Million weekend and it would STILL be a piece of shit.
Trek is getting good to very good reviews. It has the buzz and it's going to do well.
There's nothing fucking remarkable or even surprising about this as Wolvie was sounding like a stinking Turd long ago while Trek was getting very positive noises long ago too.
I do however enjoy the plaintive whining of the shrill and hysterical as they could post their bitter "gems" on every thread every 5 mins from now until the next Wolvieturd Movie appears and they still won't be taken any more seriously. -
This movie is badass. Trust me. This movie makes up for the last 2 debacles. And it further cements the fact that trek is, and always will be, better than Star Wars.
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living and working in Korea, for almost twp years now....
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I was once on a huge subway escalator behind one of those girls. Best 3 minutes of my life. I could see her tonsils.
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Spot-on casting!
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always loved it, but i was always so much more into SW. But after the prequals and how juvenile they were, and the fact that ive gotten older, I just find myself greatly preferring trek, and its more mature approach these days...
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May 05, 2009 11:22:53 PM CDT
A lot of these questions are explained in the prequel comic...
by prof. pop-cult
For example, the ship that Spock Prime flies, codenamed The Jellyfish, is an experimental Federation ship. That's why it has Majel Barret's voice. Also, Nero's ship isn't simply a Romulan mining ship -- it's a mining ship augmented with Borg technology. The screenwriters also wrote this prequel comic and consider it canon (at least when it came to their own benefit when writing the movie's screenplay).
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I'm not working at the moment. I was doing the typical English Teacher thing (not much else around here), but I needed hospital treatment around contract signing time. Looking for some journalism work while I wait for the second wave, when people get fired or quit their jobs etc.
Nagasaki's cool! If you don't mind walking uphill a lot:-).
Southafrican guy, that's cool man! I almost made a switch to Korea, but I'm kinda settled here now. It took me ages to get comfy here, so I'm gonna stick it out. -
May 05, 2009 11:27:15 PM CDT
I hope they add Rand and/or Chapel in the next movie...
by prof. pop-cult
Young Uhura is hot, but this movie lacks the young wimmin. It's nothing but handsome young dudes (who are all cool, but still). For example, it would be great if they could work in Rand, Chapel or both into the sequel. Imagine Elisha Cuthbert or Amanda Heard in any one of these roles. This series reboot is a great opportunity to expand upon either of these two female characters.
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Was Voyager and Enterprise any good ?
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A lot people will tell you it's the girly version. I guess it was at times, but a good episode could match a standard TNG. Enterprise never really felt like a real Trek show to me. The characters were mostly bland. Example..they usually have the main story & a side story about a character. One early episode had a side story about a character called Malcolm Reed, having a birthday. The crew tried to work out what kind of stuff he liked, to give him a present. Perfect opportunity to find out who one of these new chracters is, right?
Turns out, he doesn't like anything. At all. I watched it & thought "what was the fucking point of that? I just wasted an hour of my life." They intentionally wrote the boring character in the history of TV.
& as much as I loved Quantum Leap growing up, Bakula's acting was fucking woeful at times! -
i came to Korea, all the advantages of Japan, but everythings much cheaper....and i prefer the food to be honest
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odd moment, but it was always hampered by gilligans island syndrome. Nothing that ever happened mattered becos you knew they would not get home....Adn instead of delivering on the promise of a crew with conflict given its makeup, or on the reality of a ship being stranded so far from home, they always seemd to be about some hair brained scheme to get hom that you always knew would never work. Oh..and fuck Voyager for ruining the Borg by making them so toothless and easy to defeat...
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Personally, I've always got at least 2 jars of Kimchee base in at home. You can stick that stuff in anything!
The stuff you're cooking isn't going as planned? Fuck it. Throw some Kimchee in. Job's a good 'un! -
For my money, the most neutered TV show ever. It suffered from the bad points of TNG, limp-wristed PC crap.
People complained about the theme tune, but it actually set the tone perfectly for the show. Bland, middle of the road wankery. -
and damn are you right about gimchee...that shit really does go with anything...
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to see if the Na'vi of Cameron's Avatar are going to work onscreen. If they can pull it off, we may have the next classic fictional alien species....
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I'm not a big Cameron fan (unleash the geek hatred). It sounds pretty spectacular, but you won't hear any hyperbole from me about the "fucking of eyeballs" until after I've seen it.
I've been in Japan too long man! I call it Kimchee, almost like the Japanese style.."Kimuchi". I even call the silent option on my phone "Manner mode". I need help. -
their way of doing things. Hey dude, fair enough if you are nt a Cameron fan, we all have our tastes. For me based on reading the old scriptment, we could be in for a pretty cool alien worls and some really cool aliens....dont worry though dude, though im a huge Cameron fan I also hate the whole eyeball fucking thing, but lets remember that it was started by overzealous fanboys on this very site, not by anyone actually involved in the movie...
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be the closet thing to live action sci-fi anime we may get...which for my geek juices is interesting/exciting...
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That's exactly the problem with Avatar. People were talking it up befire they even knew what it was. They just assumed it was gonna be amazing. Maybe it will be! I hope so. But Cameron made Titanic, so I won't hold my breath.
When is Star Trek released in Korea by the way? It takes ages for stuff to come here! -
Is that some kind of sick joke?
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my interest/excitement is based on what ive read and the people involved in it....Unlike many I have a fairly good idea what it is, but that being said i think it may just be a big suprise to those unaware of it...they have been really clever imho to keep it so secret, and not ruin any of its suprises...
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worried about how hyped this trek movie is?
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I haven't seen or heard anything about it here. That sucks.
Is it a simultaneous worldwide release or is this country just overlooked? I tend not to even look at release dates because they never come here until months later. I had the U.K version of Casino Royale on DVD before it was even released in cinemas here. The prestige was maybe a year late. Yeah, Japan's so futuristic! -
willing to look past that, it wasnt made for someone like me. I only care that he's back where he belongs...making action sci-fi...After all lets not forget that JJ wrote Armegeddon and wrote and created Felicity...does nt mean trek wont be good...
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The last one was ripped apart by the same critics. Besides, the hype's based on a finished film. If Avatar gets the same kind of reviews as Star Trek, I'll be there!
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And I was one of the ones who was very skeptical about some of the ridiculous hyperbole being spouted about Avatar. (not least by Cameron) However, I'm not so sure it IS all hype now.
It "feels" like Cameron actually may have something genuinely jawdropping after all.
Course that is just based on vague snippets and there's nothing to back it up factually but I am growing less skeptical about Avatar's power to astound much to my surprise.
It WILL have to at least show some of what it's capable of sooner or later in the form of actual footage but it may yet surprise even the jaded. -
That's funny:-).
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tinyurl.com/crsegy
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But Fuck! Japan's last..AGAIN!
May 29th isn't as long a wait as usual though. MUST AVOID SPOILERS. -
im with you there on reviews and some trailer footage guys...we need to see something, get some kind of fell for it. And its always a good thing to wait and actually see peoples general respnse to a film. Though like you g100 ive also just got a feeling about Avatar, that it may actually not just be hype. If you read things being said by people that have no vested interest, but are coming away truly impressed...well its interesting...
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Imax London blah blah blahI did mention I had tickets right?Just checking.
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Who will be the 1st reviewer to send this sucker a rotten?!? The angry comments will be legendary!!! Possible death-threats?
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Is it 'hex key' or 'allen wrench'? No one can make up their goddamned minds.
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Lubing your eyes to be fucked by Avatar in 09. SURGEON'S HEALTH WARNING: "Ocular sex is not something to be done all-at-once. We recommend gradual penetration with visual lube, such as with anything containing Christian Bale."
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I feel like a 6 yr old on Christmas Eve!! Tonights midnight showing is gonna rock!!!
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Fuck, I'm seeing it at 9.
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miyamoto et al=fkn professional, every one of you....
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"Even if the movie is universally praised "Star Trek" still has too much cult stigma to ever be a monstrous success. The 18+ crowd may eat it up but I can't see this appealing to kids or anyone over 50. You can't get to Star Wars/Superhero movie like numbers without those categories."
Enjoy eating those words by monday. -
Admit it, they nailed 'em.
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Seriously. It's ok, it only seems to be so good because the Brosnan films were so bad. And any review that mentions Star Wars and Raiders of the Lost Ark is setting up an audience to be disappointed.
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This is Star Trek for a new generation. The kids will love it.
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Hilarious.
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This is a fun filled action movie. This is like Trek's second pilot. People forget Trek had two pilots. One a thinker show with little action, and another show with action, and big ideas behind it.
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KHANNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!
or
NEROOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
Nah,NEROOOOOOOOOOOO!!! jus doesnt have the same punch, sounds like I really want a pizza..... -
'This May, forget everything you know...Star Trek'. Now, that seems a bit extreme to me. I'd love every film I see if I forget everything I know before going to see it. Do I get my knowledge back when the film finishes? or do I have to spend my life like a retard?
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anyone pretending that was really any dumber or girlier than ANY other Trek is a complete blithering fuckhead...It was easily as intelligent and entertaining (and equally as silly as TNG) Enterprise well that was barely Star Trek, the theme was enough to make anyone hate it..(even the reworked version).
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100% on rotten tomatoes, almost unanimous positive reviews from everybody Im almost getting anxious for the bad reviews just so I can cool off the hype Im building up
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I need to see at least one bad review, just to stop me from exploding from excitment.
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Watched every episode. Thought the Doctor was hilarious and B'ellanna was hot. Liked Six too when she beamed aboard. The only really dodgy element was Neelix, but I'd still take him over Wesley Crusher.
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It's an OK movie, but I never really understood why fans have a total geekgasm over it. When I'm about 60, I plan to have a long, grey mullet and a low-cut shirt to expose my moobs like Khan though.
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him, and Six's body.
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There wasn't a character called six on Voyager. her name was Seven of Nine.
I guess you were busy doing something else when she was on screen. I wonder what? (Cough).
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it just became too homegenized. too politically correct. needed every minority to please the fans..black vulcan, asian, woman captain...tried to be groundbreaking..snooze inducing more like it.i officially tuned out with TREK because of voyager..admit it had a good theme though
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the sure sign of a wanker is anyone who pisses on about 'political correctness'....that is a person who thinks they have a RIGHT to shit on anyone...
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After Coraline, and with Drag Me To Hell released on my birthday, its been a good month for film.
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just saying...
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That should have been the tagline.
Liked Voyager? You'll love the new taste of Star-Trek -
Good story, Good visual, Good action. Good movie! I enjoyed it. A summer action flick that's worth the money you pay to see it.
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enjoyed Voyager, then good for you. I agree that the doctor wa great, and Jeri ryan certainly made it spank worthy...But im afraid there were more problems than Neelix (Star Trek's version of Jar Jar imho) there was that useless blonde chick that was with Neelix, man was that a forgettable character. And lets not forget how they ruined the Borg, who they were able to defeat so easily. This is just my opinion, but for this trekkie, they turned the best trek villains since the klingons in to a complete joke....
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Having seen the movie, it'll make money and isn't bad, plus it's certainly way better than the shitfests that were the last 2 Trek cinema films. First Contact was ok, but suffered from a low budget. Since it's been designed to be a North American summer blockbuster and feels dumbed down as any blockbuster usually is, for some reason it felt mostly forgettable after it ended.
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Was Star Trek itself, in the sense that it has rules & guidelines & conventions (not the fan kind), that it had to stick to.
Combine that with a TV budget & essentially you end up with a series that is as far removed from it's own premise as can be.
We're talking about an entirely invented universe, where the only limit is the imagination (or lack of), shown by the writers.
It's easy to forget that the weird Aliens & quaint men in rubber suits from the 60's were pretty insane to watch back then! Not that I was there, but my parents were & I remember them telling me how weird & exciting & sometimes even scary it could be. Somewhere down the line, that was lost. If the new movie brings that back, I'll be happy. -
Man, the staff in this site are in a deathrace competition to prove who sucks and swalows the most dick of Jay Jay Abrams. And i have to say, Hercules The Plant is winning by a nose. Good job, Hercules!
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are both surpassed by SHANNONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!
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Sorry. British Joke:-).
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So Abrams is a genius? A lot of people don't think so. Genius or not, I liked the movie a lot, and I want more please.
http://www.tribune.ie/arts/article/2009/may/03/off-kilter-padraig-kenny-jj-abrams-is-a-recycler-h/ -
I haven't seen it, I'll be there at midnight tomorrow night, but I thought someone should be complaining about it since this is an AICN tb, and I'll be damned if it won't be me. Can't wait! But, it sucks! I should probably just buy tickets for Friday night and Saturday too, while I'm there, to this stinkfest.
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I'll be happy to be proven he's been just a misguided developing talent..bring it on!
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Misguided? Nah. The guy certainly knows how to pump something new into anything he gets his mitts on.
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I'm really looking forward to this.
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Much love to my fellow comic book geeks hooking me up with an advance screening pass for tonight. Should be awesome.
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Six was on the other thing. I know, sometimes I have trouble telling the hot blond women inserted into sci-fi shows just to make the average nerd's peepee happy apart, too.
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I hate to tell you this, but I think Cloverfield WAS Abrams raising his game, and that was one the stupidest monster movies of all time. The end is upon us, doom is neigh! Abandon our posts! Flee, flee for our lives!
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i just didnt like the pandering to get every fucking viewer...im surprised a wayans brother wasnt on there. fuck you buddy for even trying to defend that shit..there was a reason they brought jeri ryan (and the borg) on in later seasons...they had a sinking ship from day one. im not saying they shoulda kept with the 60s mentality and im for equality of races and sexes but it was PANDERING.
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I am holier than thou and I smell PLANT cuz dude liked it. Humbug!
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OK, while I suppose it was extremely self-serving given that last night's Abrams' Fringe had a full scene from Abrams' Star Trek during a commercial break, but... Only one episode before Nimoy is set to appear, the agents talk to a crazy conspiracy guy played by Clint Howard. His story devolves into some Trek psychosis (he thought he was Spock) he essentially recounted movie's plot during his babblings. Funny stuff.
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or put on hold for years and years. And now they fawn upon this new movie like Bambi. Let these assholes learn that nothing is bad if the right person gets a hold of it.
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but they creature creations in Hellboy 2 (and Pan's Labyrinth to a lesser extent) were really impressive.
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May 06, 2009 8:34:50 AM CDT
If this flick is as GOOD as they say, it will be a HUGE HIT.
by jdanielp
And I can't get my ticket SOON ENOUGH.
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Just a few days now from IMAX glory. Great review. It's going to be a) Decent, more so than the last 5 trek films. b) make more money than the last 5 trek films. c) generate a sequel that will also be better than the last 5 trek films. Win...win...win...
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...punch up "flaccid action beats". Fact of life.
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this sounds like the kind of thing you would do if this was tanking.
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She's pretty hot for a green lady.
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Fuck all these other wannabe-movies.
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Undiscovered Country and First Contact kicked ass! Generations was...okay, and Insurrection and Nemesis WERE pretty weak. But, 6 and 8 were definitely winners.
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Bring on Avatar! (That's what I'm supposed to say here, right? And something about ocular intercourse?)
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I'll give you First contact was..."ok" but Undiscovered Country??? :o) Avatar??? The movie with Michelle Rodriguez??? /yawn...
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FaTassDino...well i hope to hell the game gets raised way past that point because Cloverfield was completely embarassing..and Harry did love that, but then the word on this Trek exceeds all that..i remain hopeful..hopeful im wrong..
__
Six demon, fuck you for pretending that's PANDERING..the show remained every bit as entertaining (and silly) as TNG ever was...ill fuckin defend whatever i like. -
No, the movie with Sigourney Weaver. And Undiscovered Country was great.
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Seriously, it was half about the movie and the other half about its context in the broader world ("It had to be fresh!"). Seriously, I'm glad you liked it and all, but you're not a critic. And you have some errors in your copy that make your points sound contradictory. Please try harder to do a better job in the future. Thanks.
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I enjoyed it. But then again I made sure to check my brain at the door before going in.
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Cloverfield was pumped full of nothing but embarassing stupid.
The worst thing this Trek could come across as is Felicity in Space..Harry wouldnt know that line if his life depended on it..
i'll know tomorrow in Imax.. -
in one fell swoop the entire output of Toho suddenly seemed deeply serious and dramatic.
Cloverfield was The Price Is Right dreaming it was The Godfather -
as it was UNORIGINAL. Blair Witch Project in monster form. Lame.
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I must have missed the bit in Blair Witch where models wandered around in scenes stolen from Aliens..
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May 06, 2009 10:03:23 AM CDT
As for the age debate, I know a 60+ year old going Friday!!!
by jdanielp
This may be like STAR WARS, in that it will appeal to young and old, alike. And who really knows? It may even outperform THE DARK KNIGHT, though I doubt THAT.
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is the best original Trek film. there I said it. Listen I like Wrath of Khan. It's great. The ending fucking kills you. But TUC has Christopher Plummer in full embellishment. You cannot dislike that. Not to mention Sulu kicks serious ass in it. SHIELDS!!!
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It had its moments, but since I saw it in the theaters, I've not once thought of revisiting it. The setup was great- what held it back was the terrible use of characters. And I never bought the guy's motives for saving the girl. Yes, LOVE, I know. But something didn't ring true the way it was portrayed.
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It's like getting mad at a homeless guy telling you the restaurant you're walking to has crappy food. The man knows not what he speaketh.
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JJ on daily doens't mean Stewart sold out. It just means Viacom owns both Comedy Central and Paramount.
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Yeah that's right. I said it waaaaay up in the TB, and now I'm saying it again to agree with Gaius and HoboCode. That movie kicks ass. Especially Sulu. "FLY her apart then!"
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Watch this douchebags, lol. http://tinyurl.com/dfs3yj
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No, I just looked on IMDB, right under SW's name...Michele Rodriguez. Translation: EPIC fail... /yawn They casting Vin Unleaded next???
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I think sulu said fly her apart because most of the cast was soooo old they were in fact, falling apart. /yawn
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I think sulu said fly her apart because most of the cast was soooo old they were in fact, falling apart. /yawn
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I've been looking forward to this movie more than any other tentpole release.
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I quiver with antici...pation.
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You couldn't have made a better movie to end the original crew's run.Now, do I like it better than Khan? I honestly don't know which one I would pick as my favorite Trek film.
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"Target that explosion and FIRE!"
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Man, I want to cheer everytime I hear Sulu say that line.
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Where did I say otherwise?
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Sulu: "Then pay up."
*Unzips pants* -
An hater is what a studio plant or an easily impresionable unimaginative easy manipulated tool calls a realist.
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The new motto for AICN and all easily manipulated by hype geek boys.
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What about all the needless posing. I know it's their last mission and everything, but that scene at the end when they save the federation president...everyone who beams down just walks upstage, bends a knee and looks around for the cameras.
It's really weird, and really awkward. It looks like they filmed the movie press conference and put it in the movie.
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I can't even remember another big budget fx movie that's ALL about the characters and uses the fx when it needs to and that's it. There's no in your face "hey, look at this cool cgi shit" moments. If anything you might walk out thinking "gee, i wish there were maybe a few more jerk off shots of the Enterprise", but the you go "wow, there weren't really any jerk off shots of anything" and that's in a good, get that cgi monkey thing out of my face way.
the new tag line:
"STAR TREK: It get's CGI monkey things out of your face." -
You're just someone that thinks they're right and (almost)everyone else is wrong.
A realist wouldn't say shit like, anyone who likes this movie is a plant or easily manipulated.
A realist would know we're all talking about very subjective shit here.
I prefer objective shit, it taste better. liked fresh roasted CGI Monkey things. -
im scared...
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Yeesh. Got grammar?
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http://tinyurl.com/8pv8n9
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No, I mean there are moments when the characters escape death, but nothing that calls attention to itself. Everyone in the theater was rooting and cheers at those cliff hanger moments.
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That SHOULD be the song playing during the young-kirk-in-the-red-corvette scene. I'm just sayin'.
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Realists kiss Jay Jay's ass? I don't think so.
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...at the Scotiabank theatre downtown. The only place in the city it is playing in Imax is in the Colossus in god-forsaken Vaughn. Anyone have any answers?
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Next week, I was thinking about going to the movies. Managed to get the options down to two -- Wolverine or Star Trek. Could you maybe provide me with some objective views as to make the choice a little easier?
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... the biggest dick sucking in AICN's history. Spock comented: "Fascinating! All this shit is fucking illogical, Jim".
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http://www.txmma.com/modules.php?name=Forums&file=viewtopic&p=137402#137402
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George Takai to William Shatner on Comedy Central's roast. Required viewing.And if Wolverine can open to almost 90 million last weekend, I say 110-115 easy for Star Trek...Fuck swine flu.
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www.txmma.com/modules.php?name=Forums&file=viewtopic&p=137402#137402
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Sounds like jealousy to me. Didn't YOU get enough gobbling time? You did get the "UP" or "DOWN" Special, "UP" your ASS then "DOWN" your throat!!!!Salud!!!
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And here's to you, Herc! SPOILER warning will follow later! Wonderful description. I'm almost on your side with this review - almost! I felt this movie made nearly everything perfect - as a movie! I was entertained (btw: STAR TREK fan/viewer since 1972 - in Germany - EVERY Episode ever!), laughed a lot, felt excited... And the story made sense... almost! It felt rushed with the explanation of Nero's motives and I didn't like the soundtrack. It didn't have a real movie feeling for me. I thought I hear recognizable LOST-Themes all along. Many moviegoers think, sometimes music's overdone in movies. Here I think, there were some scenes that felt kind of missing an underlying score. SPOILER BEGINS: Sorry for NOT having Romulan cloaking deviced inviso-text here: Vulcan is no moon of Delta-Vega. That part made besides of your remark no sense at all - no matter which time-frame at all. SPOILER END! It's a really Must-Be-Seen-More-Than-Three-Times-Movie! First: to catch all that's going on, Second: because it's very, very good! And no! I haven't been invited by anyone (including JJ!) to watch it for free - nor haven't been invited to the sets. AND I've NOT been offered a minor/significant role in the sequel... and that's a real shame! Come on, producers!!! ;-)
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May 06, 2009 6:45:37 PM CDT
Who cares when BARCA 1-1 Chelsea. AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
by most excellent ninja
Barca just owned Chelsea in the face. Fuck yeah. 92nd min goal. HAHAHAHAHAH
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too bad the game will be over at 6 am
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May 06, 2009 8:23:49 PM CDT
most excellent ninja -- jesus christ will you fucking die?!!!
by dannyglovers_dickblood
at least change your fucking handle so I can have the satisfaction of pretending you died in a horrible car accident with your skank wife.
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many of my fellow hard line trekkies are pissed at the changes and I kinda understand. But trek must evolve, it can't just be comfort food or nostalgia because that will surely kill it.
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really, i have no idea who he is, never read his posts.....
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Why would i be jealous of a cock sucking shrill? Is that how you measure people who are not impressed with hacks, their works and the people who suck their dicks? Petty Jealousy? Sounds like that's the kind of attitude YOU would have. It's the people sick with jealousy who always presume others to be jealous people as well. Get better, dude.
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I wouldn't call this new Star Trek movie evolution.
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That last goal was quite something to behold, wasn't it? Quite unexpected and a true hammer to the head of Chelsea. I bet Abramovitch is really very sorry he let go of José Mourinho now.
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So, you are the real deal, aren't you? The real guy. And not that anoying impostor. I'm glad i made your acquiantance, finally. You are quite a legend in here, aren't you now, sir?
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youre thinking of klingons
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in a preview in Germany. What an AMAZING piece of geniality, holy shit!!!!!!!!
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... but not of any kind done before."
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And I fuckin' love the Star Trek universe. Tasha Yar's daughter was a way more fleshed out villain. Wolverine destroys this movie. Suck shit.
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it's fucking bright ! Damn those solar flares !
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She has kinda a scrawny sandwich-hating runway model body and face. She is just a little too alien/elfin for me. But maybe the stills dont do her justice.
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His face is all blurry and out of focus at the end of the film. Didn't that already happen in New York Stories?
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Could you possibly try to suck Danny's prick more?Cocksucker.
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Very slick piece of work. It moves so quickly, that there is barely time for any emotional resonance, and things happen that should be very heavy in the Trek universe. Spock prime basically becomes Obi Wan Kenobi to Kirk's young Skywalker. JJ was right - he was a bigger fan of Star Wars. Bana, sadly, becomes a rather lightweight villain... no comparison to Khan. But then, the film moves so quickly and slickly past huge events, we are not given time to care. Still, it was a likable, fun summer movie and much popcorn will be munched. I agree with the invisotext on the flaws. But I really enjoyed the movie while watching it. Just as I enjoy Chinese food while eating it. The only thing that really stuck to my ribs was Karl Urban as Bones. BTW, it's amazing how losing one's father at a young age can cause them to grow a foot taller. Shatner Kirk's father must have done numerous things to stunt his growth... good thing Nero got him out of the picture.
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Kirk Spock Uhura is Luke Han Leah dynamic. One of Spock Prime's last lines is a lift from Empire. Snow monsters straight out of Empire. Even phaser SFX are more SW that ST. Just saying.
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So, you aren't jealous that other people got more of JJs cock than you, you're just mad cause you had to leave early to climb on Michael Manns' MEAT!!Suck away COCK FAG!!!
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and realize that:
1) Its fairly slow in between blowing shit up.
2) It's action nonsense for people who don't know star trek and therefore won't get upset the they piss on it.
3) Yeah, there were some jokes.
4) Like Casino Royale killed bond (by making him just another violent psychopath) this killed off mostly 40 years of story - but I suppose its better than Battlestar Galactica, here "reality" still exists in another reality.
5) Urban is a great actor, but I'm not sure he's really McCoy. He also seems older than he was in the original series.
6) Except - no. Kirk is not cool. The actor is not cool, and that translates into a non cool Kirk, regardless of what the character does.
7) Are you kidding - he stands around kissing the crew? Pathetic.
8) Bana was just another boring cartoon crook with no credibility either.
9) But don't kiss Spock damn it.
10) Well yeah.
11) Stupid premise which doesn't show respect for the past.
12) many things. Like the writers doesn't understand the difference between a galaxy and a solar system? -
So, I saw the movie over the weekend, and I couldn't wait for the action scene that you loved. You wrote, "the kirk-robocop chase is one of the coolest action scenes I've ever seen." Are you deranged? That wasn't even a chase. Young Kirk drove in a straight line. A robo-cop told him to stop. Young Kirk turned, drove in a straight line and then the scene ended like we all saw in the preview. That was, "one of the coolest action scenes" you've ever seen? How many movies have you seen? Three? And this was the third? That was probably the weakest "action scene" in the entire movie. Did you think it was so great because of the music playing in the background? I don't get it. Either you're an idiot or you were lying or you really love SABOTAGE. If you had written that the opening action sequence was fantastic I would have agreed with you, but the car chase??? You should watch DIE HARD, or PREDATOR, or COMMANDO. Those are really good action movies with many really good action scenes.
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