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Massawyrm is disappointed by the dangling blue dong of WATCHMEN...
Hola all. Massawyrm here.
I want to love WATCHMEN so bad it hurts. I mean I really, really want to love it. But I can’t. It is the cinematic equivalent of a Penguin Blowjob, delivering the goods for a solid two and a half hours before overdrafting every last bit of goodwill it has earned in the last fifteen. It’s not that there’s nothing to love here. There’s a LOT to love. There’s a lot that Snyder not only got right from the comic, but actually did better. But, for me, it doesn’t excuse what he did to the ending. What, Wyrm? You mean the squid? No, not the god damned squid. I’ve written it before and I will no doubt write it again: when you are adapting something it is not the details that are important. It is the SOUL that is important. As long as the adaptation SAYS the same things and MEANS the same things as the original work, then I don’t care if it is a squid or a giant baboon or a nuclear warhead. As long as the story remains intact.
Here? It doesn’t.
Look, WATCHMEN is the HAMLET of comic books. It is our one great tragic masterpiece. As many have said and will continue to say, it is literature. The ending isn’t just IMPORTANT to WATCHMEN, it is the point of the story. The entire thing works up to it. The whole of the 12 issue series is filled with brilliant foreshadowing and little jokes about what is to come. Every character arc finds its end beautifully tied up without a single, unnecessary, dangling thread left behind. And while it does not end well, it ends exactly as it should to make the statement that it needs to make. Some people hate it the first time they read it. But many revisit it as it sets in and marinates over time. Well, Snyder understands that hate. And Zach Snyder would really like it if you didn’t hate the ending to his movie. So he changed it.
Imagine if you will the ending of the aforementioned HAMLET. As directed by Zach Snyder. (INSERT slo-mo/speed up jokes of choice here.) Now, this version of Hamlet is AWESOME. Everything is just as you saw it in your head, and while it isn’t a word for word adaptation, it captures every major scene in just the same way as the play did – only in less time and with much better production values. But then you get to the end. And it’s…different. Gertrude doesn’t drink the poisoned cup – instead she catches a nick from Laertes poison tipped sword. Hamlet, thrown into a rage drives his sword through Laertes, and then charges the king, killing him as well. Then hamlet, distraught over what he’s just done, falls to his knees and drives his unblunted sword (because blunted swords would look lame) through his own gut. Horatio lunges forward screaming “HAMLET! NOOOOOOO!” But it is too late. Hamlet is dead. Horatio gives a speech – and Fortinbras doesn’t show up, because let’s face it, it always was a little too convenient of time to arrive, don’t you think, and today’s audience won’t buy that.
You see, technically, it’s the same ending. Everyone who lives, lives, and everyone who dies, dies. But this is an ending today’s audiences will like more, right? Maybe. But that’s not how HAMLET is supposed to end. And this isn’t how WATCHMEN is supposed to end, either. This ending is a little too happy. A little too Hollywood. And the reason everyone goes their separate ways and the mood in which they do so just so contradictory to the original work that it is very jarring to fans of the book. I was LOVING the movie until the final chapter. I mean LOVING it. I was seeing the film everyone else had been writing about. Snyder had nailed it. And as everything started falling into place, I could feel it all slipping away. It was one of those “loss of erection” moments in which you pray that it stands back up, but in doing so it only gets limp and useless in your hand. NONONONONONON! Come back to me! Don’t fail on me now! But it’s over. It’s gone.
But the two and a half hours before that – fucking exquisite. What he gets right, he really gets right. There are a lot of things he leaves behind or under-explained, but it works for the most part. There are plenty of visual cues that convey a lot of the books in-jokes that might require longer explanation. And his work at putting you in the universe of WATCHMEN is incredible. The book really does come alive right in front of you. In fact, there are two elements I find superior here than in any other presentation of the work.
The first is Adrian Veidt. Matthew Goode lends a real humanity to the role that never quite came across to me on the page. READING Ozymandias speak is something like listening to an arrogant college professor drone on – what he has to say is important, but it never comes across like he FEELS what he is saying. Goode lends a delightful, excited touch of madness to Ozy, letting him come across as a guy who really believes in what he’s doing. I never fully understood Veidt until I saw Goode’s portrayal of him. I never liked him or cared at all until he was presented just so.
The second is Jackie Earl Haley as Rorschach. He. Is. Rorschach. Period. Once you’ve seen this, sit down and reread the comic and you can’t escape Haley’s voice. His portrayal. It is seeing Shakespeare performed the way it was meant to be seen, an Oscar caliber performance that carries the film (and many of the weaker actors in the cast.) This is his movie, his truly epic performance. Even the people who hate the living shit out of this film will find it hard to knock what he’s done with the character. The look (even without the mask), the voice, the staccato of his speech. It all captures the book and at times elevates the material.
Entire patches of the film are thrilling, funny or downright heart-wrenching. Say what you will about the changes that were made (and I’ll have more to say later) it is clear that Snyder LOVES this book and its characters. Everyone is presented in a way that you feel for them; even the guys you never feel much for in the book. The stuff that’s gone – Captain Metropolis, the newsstand owner, the Psychiatrist’s home life – that’s all the stuff that I was fine with being left by the way side. It’s stuff that probably only worked best in the book anyway.
But many of the complaints out there are right on. The film IS dense. The makeup is occasionally complete ass, with almost every bit of “aging makeup” looking AWFUL. The lack of score is a bit jarring – I was kind of hoping for a healthy mix of era appropriate music and original orchestral – but several of the songs that weren’t era appropriate seemed terribly out of place. A few of the actors were a bit uneven, especially Malin Ackerman as Laurie Jupiter who comes off a bit stiff most of the time. And while I applaud Snyder’s stick-to-it-ness in bringing us dangling blue dong, after a while it becomes a bit excessive. They didn’t have to give the brother pants or anything – but Zach, come on. Medium shots? From the waist up, maybe? Once in a while? There comes a point at which I was reminded of SUPERBAD and wondered if Snyder sat around drawing Dr. Manhattan all day in school as a child. Put that together with 300 and it begins to paint a picture…
So will you like it? Fuck if I know. The audience opinion was across the board, from people wanting to name their first born Rorschach to people walking out in disgust and bitching for a solid hour. Not to mention all points in between. What I find most interesting is that Harry and I both equally love and hate almost the exact same things. And yet he walked out thrilled and I walked out dumbstruck, disappointed and completely unsure of what had just happened. I saw this film a week and a half ago and I’ve finally found the words to write about how I feel. And I have a lot more to say – so next Monday, once you folks have all had your shot at seeing it, I’m going to write something I almost never write: a spoiler heavy dissection of where I felt this went right and where it went VERY wrong. I look forward to the discussion with you all. Until then, I’m dying to see how this plays out. It is a divisive film, a mixed bag that everyone will react to differently. And right now I am absolutely fascinated by everyone’s reactions. See you guys Monday.
Until next time friends, smoke ‘em if ya got ‘em.
Massawyrm
Got something for the Wyrm? Mail it here.
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Snyder needs to go to movie jail
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Snyder is not a movie director, he is a salesman and he will con you. Over and over.
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T4 WILL OWN WATCHMEN ASS
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How is it that the most convincing old-person makeup in the world is the guy from the 6 Flags commercials and not a Hollywood feature?
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FOR CRIME AGAINST COMIC BOOKS AND AGAINST CINEMA
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Will judge for myself. So you loved it? Except the last 15 mins killed the whole movie for you. So now you hate it? Does anyone else feel this way who saw it?
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I don't agree with all of your reviews but you always hit your points square on the head. To see you give this a negative puts a big dent in my confidence.
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How is it in any way different? The books ending wasn't somber. It ended on the journal. A small sign of hope that the truth can one day be told.
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I have no idea what to expect when I see the movie this weekend.
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Avatar will be fuc..... ahhhhh you know the drill already. I'm still up for this flick and I'm very excited about it.
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Mar 04, 2009 9:49:37 AM CST
Massawyrm's reviews have consistently gotten better and better..
by neomyers
I used to hate his reviews. I thought they were high-minded righteous preaching, but he gradually found the right note as far as I'm concerned. The Dr. Manhattan/Superbad reference had me rolling. I don't always agree with him--Friday the 13th being on example, I liked it a lot--but damn if I don't laugh out loud at least 5 times while reading his reviews. Bravo.
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Mar 04, 2009 9:49:48 AM CST
I saw it last night. At the end some cheered and some booed.
by kid idioteque
I honestly couldn't have asked for much more from it. An independent production wouldn't have the resources to make such a film and films in the Hollywood system always have constraints. It's not perfect but I enjoyed the hell out of it. If you're not a purist asshole and are ready to be taken for a visual ride, you'll probably like it, too. I had no problem with the make-up, I thought the music really great (songs and score), and the actors were all convincing. Jackie Earle Haley blew me away. For being nearly 3 hours long, I thought it flew by. Can' wait to see the extended versions (and I usually HATE extended versions of anything). Bottom line is that I think I preferred it to TDK, which I liked a lot but didn't love like most people.
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and that's that.
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I got nothing to say about WATCHMEN cos I haven't watched it yet.
But I do find it amusing that Massa condemns the dong and belittles drawing phallic images. Why?
...Because his cartoon Avatar has got a HUGE FUCKING SERPENT WRITHING OUT FROM HIS CROTCH!!!! -
Isn't it weird that Citizen Kane is the one movie that did it absolutely right, yet it's the oldest?
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I don't know what to expect, and i'm trying not get my hopes up, but they are. i'll give it a look
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;-) I was able to see a sneak preview this past Monday and felt the same exact way; so much done right yet some things were so wrong (the big reveal on Mars was very, very, very disappointing and lacking) and almost souless. I understand the need for the artist to apply their style and interpretation but damn did I really want to like this more than I did but maybe I'll be persuaded after seeing it in IMAX for the midnight premiere. If anything, with the way I feel about it, I give it 3 3/4 out of 5.
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Blaming Snyder is easy. Could even be accurate, but here's the question you should ask yourself: how likely is it that he was given a choice: make it have a Hollywood ending or ... no, there wasn't like a choice "B". We'll know in a few months when the DVD comes out, I imagine. Like Blade Runner and Abyss, there will likely be a very interesting director's cut for this one.
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...position of everyone else. what a surprise. This means that the movie is really good.
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...but it sure smells good!
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the ending would have been fine.
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Be thankful that it is as good as it is and not...... well... Uwe Boll like.
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Admit it Massa - you weren't 'disappointed' by the dong.
You were 'distracted' by the dong. Couldn't tear your eyes away from it. The dong enthralled you. The dong was fucking your eyeballs and you were worried that you liked it.
That's my read on this review anyway, and im never wrong. Mwahhahahaha. -
Just wait until the director's cut comes out in theaters in July and then the massive Freaky Deaky (or whatever the hell he named it) DVD edition with Tales of the Black Freighter edited in AND director's cut. THAT may be the ultimate dvd to have. Time will tell. All things considered with the source material being so well know, a trilogy really should have been the way to go. Four chapters per movie. Just look at the trade and see how well each 1/3 ends on an awesome cliffhanger.
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I will reserve judgment until Friday, i could have seen it tomorrow in London but can't afford the bus ticket. From what i'm reading from people this film is just no quite there then.
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I mean the comic book. Jesus Christ yeah it's great. It's not the best comic book ever for the love of god. It wasn't even the best one that year. Just because it's "dense" and "literary" people fall all over themselves praising it: "Oh look a superhero comic book for grown ups! It's so complex!" SO WHAT
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Dude, I'm listening to the score right now. Are you saying there's just not enough of it?
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I'm seeing this Friday, I'm gonna come back to this review, and see if I agree with Massa
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I bet you read Teen Titans.....
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Mass, All, this is, by all account, A FILM. What's the FILM like eh? Not what's the film like compared to the Comic, and in ou wet dreams. Please, fo rthe love of God, how is the film. I could endlessly go on about films adapted from Books, I read a lot, bt I try to look at the art created in each space. If it wasn't for this place, I'd never know about the fucking squid! and before you ask, yeah yeah, I've been reading comics, not 'graphic novels' for a long time. My Brother (rest his soul) first job was in london in a comic dhop, so I;ve been reading all Marvel et al since way back in 1972, collected all of the mags, specials, everything. In fact, due to my Dad working in films most of his life, I got to go on an amazing set in 1976, weird dtuff, walked around a whole spaceship inside, saw a massve landing foot on a planet set, turned out it was Alien. But, someone here has obviously poured their heart into this, thank God some People still want to make these films, cos I stunned when they come out and People still winge that 'the COMIC was better!'. WTF, seriously, wtf fellas.
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because Im not homosexual. That's not a knock against anyone who IS a homoesexual, but as I am not one, and generally dont seek out pornographic material consisting of nothing but naked flaccid penises, this movie steps into that arena with the absolutely unnecessary quantity of it.
I checked for myself - in the comic book, you see Dr Manhattan's penis four times - FOUR TIMES.
In Watchmen, which I have not seen for myself, it is my understanding from reading detailed reports from screeners that the penis itself may as well be in the credits. The thing punctuates every scene.
for me - its fine to just show it once or twice to establish that DR M is so-far-removed from his humanity, that nudity is not even on his radar; on in this case, his GAYdar. But Snyder appears to have taken every opportunity, and in some scenes, outright CREATED opportunities, to show male genetalia in the movie. In the words of a great and wise man, its F**KING DISTRAAAAACTING.
Its also the kind of thing 8 year olds with crayons and handicams would make.
I've gone from wanting to see this at the magic hour of 03-06-09, 12:00 - the four stations of the clock; a symbolic viewing, if you will - to not even caring to see this on DVD.
If it means being able to enjoy the movie without the gratuitous homo-erotica, I'll wait to see it on the Sci-Fi channel.
This movie didn't need a gimmick to generate publicity, and it just looks and feels like Snyder's plan here was to get all the Tipper Gore's of the world to go on the O'Reilly Factor and complain about this movie and its big flaccid candy blue penis.
Usually when movies resort to marketing gimmicks for publicity, its a sign that the movie has nothing by way of substance or experience.
I wont be spending money to see this. Bring it on, Sci-Fi Channel. -
..but the rest is not ruined because of it. I'll say Fight Club. That twist is AWFUL and makes no sense but the movie still rocks.
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Mar 04, 2009 10:06:25 AM CST
Something I never understood about the journal.. help me out.
by fanboy71
How did it get back to New York, and how could it have included what Ozy said in the Arctic about making the squid? Did Rorshach drop it in a mailbox outside of Ozy's lair? It has been awhile since the last time I read it, so I can't remember the answer. I'm sure someone here knows.
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for those who can't read more than 15 words without having to eat a Snicker's bar...
I'd rather have my Watchmen experience peppered with frequent interruptions by Shamwow and Mighty Putty than frequent interruptions by homo-erotic soft porn. -
He mailed before he went to the lair.
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I spoke too soon. Before I complained about Watchmen being overrated I should have read the entire review so I could truly understand the ridiculousness of the comic's status. Seems like the movie is making people take it to the next level.
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I work for a major radio station company and two of the stations in our cluster had a joint advance screening of Watchmen so I got to see it Monday and it is amazing. The movie brings to life the comics in an amazing way. I personaly enjoyed the movie ending far more that the comic ending. It is far more tragic. I don't want to say anything else about the ending that would spoil it. But it is truly beyond me how anyone could have a problem with this movie. The only people who won't like it are the nerds who are never happy with anything other than their own idealized version they have in their heads. Nothing is ever good enough. I'm usually on board with all of Massawyrm's reviews and I think he is the best reviewer on this site but this time I have to completely disagree. I do look forward to his piece next week though.
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Eh?? No, and i'm going to say no even though i haven't seen the film yet.
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Stating that Snyder changed the ending so people would like it is obnoxious. You don't know why he changed it. There are so many assumptions there, from the fact that he thought people wouldn't like it, to the idea that there wasn't another reason to change it - for instance to streamline the story. I'm not even saying it was a good idea but unless there's an interview somewhere with Snyder saying "Yeah - I thought people would be turned off by the squid, even though it would work so well in a movie, so I changed it" ...
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.. who avoided the source material ALL this time. I look forward to the detailed criticism. It'll be interesting to see what others who have never read it feel as opposed to those who have elevated the source to high art. (perhaps correctly?)
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Mar 04, 2009 10:13:44 AM CST
If I wanted to see a limp blue cock, I'd look in the mirror.
by stuntcock mike
Well, not blue.
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You're a comic book nerd, I get it.
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Funny thing is i'm not.
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You know why you don't see the dick more in the comic? Because of the AUSTIN POWERS -esque use of objects in the foreground to obscure it. It's one thing to do that in still comic frames, but if you tried to do it in a movie you may as well have Mike Myers play Dr. Manhattan. Maybe give him a little blue Mini Me with no dialogue. The choices were: dick, or little black speedo. Oh, and OF COURSE Massawyrm has dick issues; he's a religious zealot.
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He was a fellow of infinite jest!!!
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Anybody who uses "You read " as an insult or taunt is a comic book nerd in my book. Don't set the bar so high for yourself.
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You're really hung up on this blue dong issue...even took the time to flip page by page and count how many times it appreared in the comic.
We get it...you're not gay. You didn't need to post a 250 word clarification on the matter.
Thou protest too much. -
Then it would have details leading up to the reveal, but not the reveal.
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And personally, I think your version of the ending would have been far superior. You say it just wouldn't be Hamlet? Maybe you have forgotten that Hamlet spends the whole play whining and crying and plotting only to - SPOILER - do jack shit but whine and cry some more. Frankly, in my mind, Hamlet would evoke much more sympathy and be much more interesting if at the end he actually had some balls to do what we're being told he WANTS to do this entire time.
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It can't be worse than the Spirit, right? If you want a "Hollywood" ending; check out Sam Hamm's Watchmen script.
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Mar 04, 2009 10:22:20 AM CST
The lack of score was jarring...Maybe they needed Maurice Jarre?
by sequitur
More Jarre, I tell you.
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It's Wednesday after all, and Wednesday is Comic Book Day!
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When we can't handle the sight of a penis on screen. Is it really that much of a threat to your heterosexuality? Its the "shirtless men of 300" all over again. It says more about the people who complain than about the films themselves.
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put me off reading your review. Its like something teenagers write in the comments. which is usally nonsense.
I'm also tired of Avatar comments poping up in every god damn story! -
Instead of droning on about Hamlet and your flacid cock, how about telling us the fuck WHY the Watchmen ending sucks? What is different?
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Glad I got that off my chest.
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ending doesn't work. loses all the profundity.
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Watchmen is not the "high literature" we want it to be. The Hamlet comparison is embarassing.
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Your book is wrong.
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If you're so into this movie, then a slightly off key ending cannot, will not spoil it for you. And the blue dong? Jesus. Grow up.
Flick is a masterpiece. Period. -
...before they left for the arctic. It didn't include the squid specifically, but it pointed at Ozymandias.
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... don't blame the movie makers, blame the fucked-up entertainment industry and corporate america. They changed the story so thay can have another fucking lame-ass franchise and keep milking tha cow until it is dry-up and reviled.
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Ozy is the mask killer. Anyone who digs deeper will discover his bigger plan. Its the smoke that leads to the fire.
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how is he gone when the first set pics showed him: http://tinyurl.com/cpuqne
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Mar 04, 2009 10:33:35 AM CST
Watchmen Ending Happy/Same reason Slumdog One Best Picture!
by what the duck
Dont get me a wrong i loved lumdog. I also think changing the Watchmen ending is bullshit! I think that are country is very depressed with everything going on so the studios probably wanted a "happier" ending. I dont want to get into whether slumdog was the best movie or not but it was the feel good movie of the year, and i feel that is why it one because right now people need hope. Still they should have not fucked with the ending.
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you're not supposed to care for him, Goode was miscast, he was supposed to be distant from humanity. You completely missed the point.
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I wanted to love it. I really did. But ... FUCK.
I wasn't bothered by the squid thing. Really. But there were several parts where Zack strayed from the book needlessly, and they jarred. Maybe he thought he was improving on the original, but no.
And the acting by the guy who played Ozymandias was pretty bad.
It could have been a LOT better, with just some minor tweaks. I think that's the most frustrating thing for me. -
I gave up after that horrible fucking ending to Hamlet analogy.
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they filmed him, but he isn't in the theatrical cut of the movie.
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Is an idiot.
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is interesting...I always interpreted it as a happy ending anyways-I mean Laurie and Dan have each other, Dr.Manhattan is happy enough to move on and Veidt HAS successfully saved the world from nuclear armageddon (despite his methods)...surely thats pretty happy stuff isnt it? I get that the new york moments and the death of Rorshach are dark moments, but even he dies in a fitting way-knowing he is dieing to preserve a world saving lie, yet not compromising his principles...its the only way for his character to go really. So while its not a Return Of the Jedi style ending, the problems in the story are all resolved, so it is essentially happy...and I always took the journal as a bad sign, accompanied by Manhattans "Nothing ever ends" line...if the journal gets published then the world will rip down Veidt, confusion will reign and maybe the Cold War would heat up again, undoing all his good work (alternately maybe the world will be astounded by his methods to stop conflict and agree that if someone is willing to go that far, everywhere needs to resolve their issues peacefully)...having not seen the flick yet (got my ticket booked though)I have to see how happy Snyders let it go, but Im very curious to see how the tone goes...
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The vendor and the black kid will
probably be in the Black Freighter
dvd which parallels the movie... -
I went back and decided to give it another go and had to give up again after the limp dick analogy of the next paragraph.
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...I can't hear your voice when you're talking out of your ass.
Now listen, I'm going to give this movie a fair shake, but if you think the reasons you gave are a justification for vilifying the last 15 minutes of the movie, then I've lost all respect for you as a reviewer. "*whiny voice* Well, no! That's not supposed to happen! They're not supposed to die THAT way, they're supposed to die THAT way!". To use a much beleaguered term: Fucking clownshoes. -
it's refreshing to see someone who writes for the internets NOT jumping on board the WATCHMEN blowjob-fest.
i have not seen the film, so cannot weigh in with an opinion, but I get suspicious of all the geek love being heaped on this, and contrasting that with the short scenes that were released, which were uniformly TERRIBLE.
one point i'd like to raise about ALL reviews however, good and bad, is that writers keep refering to Snyder and his "choices" as though he were some kind of auteur and this was HIS story..
OK, that is patent BULLSHIT. People need to realize and remember that Snyder is a studio HIRE, brought on to a project after 20 years of development !
Snyder is a NOBODY as far as this thing is concerned. I really don't care that he fought for an 80s setting and for the rights of blueballs to exist onscreen ! He's just another Hollywood committee-member, so he was not some autonomous figure, get it? I wanted to laugh until I shit when someone asked Snyder in an interview why he chose to work with this material. BECAUSE it CAME to him! He's not Polanski! A job opened up - it called him on the phone. Because he made a film that grossed a lot of money and the bosses thought he was some fucking expert on comic books and was still green enough that he wouldn't be too difficult.
Snyder NOT doing a comic book ADAPTATION would be like Lucas NOT doing a Star Wars film. -
In the comic they are still pictures.... you can draw Dr.M looking like he is walking across a room without showing his penis. However in film, people move... thus its harder to 'not show' it. Just ignore it, Dr.M doesnt care, why should you.
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There is no such thing as "truth" in a fucking opinion!
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Really, I could. It works for me. Go for it Massa.
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Wait, never mind.
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Type 'watchmen thames projection' into google before 8pm on wednesday 4th March. Looks like a cool event is happening. I emailed this site, but nothing has been posted about it......
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But opinoins are varied on this one, I will judge for myself.
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...why Masa thinks the ending doesn't work. I've seen the film and think you do get the same meaning as you do from the end of the comic. Guess we'll find out next week.
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Your a quasi geek whose made two succesful films. Watchmen comes across your lap. You realize that your the only chance this project has to come out just like the comic. If its a failure than at least its your and you tried hard. If you let it go you may have to watch some studio guys fuck it up. What do you do J_difool? Snyder picked up his balls and made a difficult choice. But you can go back to litening to your punk records and smoke pot and complain about "the man" all you want. Snyder actually worked on on Watchmen. You can believe anything you want. The proof is on the screen. A three hour R rated art house comic book.
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What? More tragic because more people died? that's fucking stupid. I remember alot of people died in the day after tomorrow, i didn't give a shit. The comic was profound. The imagery of bodies amidst a monster has been burnt into everyone who read the comic, the idea of humanity uniting against aliens is far more powerful than dr manhattan.
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I bought Ozymandias in the comic. I understood him and empathised with him, actually.
The actor though... He doesn't strike me as someone who can buy and sell these business men three times over. He has no presence. When you look at his eyes, you don't see someone who's planning 10 steps ahead of you.
The minor things in the movie which annoyed you, like Manhattans knob, didn't bother me in the slightest. I was more bothered by the fact that there are supposed to be no super-powers in this story other than Manhattan, yet the violence is insanely comic-book like, and not even REMOTELY trying to exist in the real world.
And the ending.. God yeah. You never get the sense that the journals discovery is going to fuck everything up. It's a happier, brighter world. Hollywood can't abide a dark ending, it seems. -
The movie ending does not change the intent or meaning of the story. The only people who would think so are idiots who just assume the intent is different because details are different. In the book Veidt blames a made-up squid and talks Manhattan into leaving Earth. In the movie the Doc is framed and then he still leaves. If anything the movie ending is better because Ozymandias makes it personal for Manhattan. He was just talked into saving lives by Laurie on Mars and when he gets back Ozy proves it's not about any specific person's life it's about all of humanity. That's the way I see it. Anyone that disagrees feel free to fuck off.....wait I mean write a return post with actual reasons why it sucks instead of "boooooo it's different".
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..Nite Owl and Spectre are living in Veidts "better world". Its in the god damn comic. Veidts plan worked. The world is at peace. Its like a Utopia. Whats so fucking dark about that? Did you people read another god damn book? Cause theirs only one watchmen and thats how it ended. The Journal is more for tha audience than it is for the characters in the book. WE DECIDE if peace is worth it.
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Let's face it the review basically said that the movie was good but the ending sucked. Now lets look back at some other great movies with bad endings. For instance THE DARK KNIGHT. Now TDK's ending wasn't terrible it was kind of underwhelming compared to the rest of the film. Plus I just don't buy that a happy ending to the watchmen would make it bad. Honestly I thought the original ending was a very happy ending, other than Rorschach. Also I wouldn't mind a little more resolve on Dr. Manhattan.
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Well, that's a new approach. Can't wait to read Part Deux (note: not meant sarcastically).
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Was really rushed. By the time Batman is jetting away in his batpod we are just thrown a bone on Dents funeral and we get a forced final "dark knight" line. Its hardly a perfect conclusion and yet its not a deal breaker. But man its SO DARKZ! OH MY GODZ THE DARKZ ENDINGZ! Maybe in watchmen Snyder should have shot the last few scenes with no lighting. That way its dark enough for the internet morons.
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but there was this one time that I had blue balls.Okay. Happened more than once.
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to die... to dream... perchance to squid...
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I always thought it was kind of scary how Laurie and Dan both had white hair. As if Veidt has managed to white wash the world with these perfect blonde people walking around with smiles on their faces. Its downright creepy. Happy my ass.
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everything was great! But I didn't like the ending so the whole movie sucks. Just like No Country for Old Men. I just can't trust these reviews anymore.
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Mar 04, 2009 10:58:29 AM CST
What's so distracting about a cock, Arcadian Del Sol?
by talkbacker with no name
You not seen one before? is it distracting in the showers after gym class? Can you not help but look at all the dongs? Do you imagine things? homosexual things?...give me a break! grow the fuck up and come out the closet already
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you went through the comic and COUNTED the amount of times the blue cock appears in it!?
Strange chap. -
So the whole thing sucks.
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But it's Teen Titans! Don't play dumb, you nerd you.
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does Rorschach's journal make it to the magazine? I read reports it was in, that it was out. To me it was the perfect ambiguous ending - that bit that leaves you with a smile on your face as you walk out the door - the possibilities, the fact that the whole thing could have been flipped on its head. If this is out then it could very badly affect how much I enjoy this.
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does indeed make it to the new frontiersman at the end
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the fact that Batman says he's not a hero but he is, that music, THAT FUCKING AMAZING MUSIC! The cool idea that after this chaos the film reverts to the heroic Batman from Batman Begins, the color palette goes back to that red and brown, and that perfect timing of the kick in the of the 'good' theme, the one that is played when Batman is formed in the cave. It's brilliant.
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instead of dark brown. Fuck snyder and his damn changes.
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We saw it last night with an acquaintance who knows nothing of the graphic novel. His statement after it ended? "Is the graphic novel that depressing too?" So this idea that there's a "happy ending"? Don't think so Massa. You need a new criticism to focus on.
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Meh. You didn't like 300 either.*shrugs*
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I'll agree with Massa that Nixon's makeup was crap, but Carla's was pretty well done, I thought.
Audience here in Albuquerque loved it, but there were a few grumbles from some of the ladies in the audience as we walked out... -
Was the Star Trek trailer any good? Thats prob the only reason I might walk into the theater then come out for a refund thx
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Is this what AICN has become? Our faithful quasi-celebrity talking heads simply watch a film, tell us what they think and hope that it is cool and distinctive because they use the word FUCK a few times while comparing the end of this movie to the author's chronic erectile dysfunction? Damn. There are medications for your erectile dysfunction, Massawyrm. And a few etiquette classes in the REAL world (*such as the workplace or college) might help alleviate your "cool" use of the word "fuck," "puss," or "dangling dong." However, I think that your rhetoric about a "arrogant college professor" lead me to believe that you never actually graduated from college. Sigh. This website has gone to the "dangling dongs" for about five years now. The reviews suck, the reviewers are little fish acting like whales, and the fraternal feeling that used to exist here has become more of a collection of intolerant liberal geeks who squeal like pigs at the slop presented by other liberals. It is all a bit tragic...like Hamlet.
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You are a genius.
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Did you complain when you read the novel too? And it really wasn't in there for as much as you've been led to believe by certain reviewers. Seriously, Massa. Does the cock scare you that much?
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Different people have different priorities when they watch a film, and different things will affect them in different ways. Sometimes, the ending *is* important. Sometimes, not so much. One of the reasons I didn't particularly care for Burn After Reading was because the ending just petered out. Yet, I really did enjoyed the rest of the movie. But for some reason, for me, the last 5 minutes kinda spoiled all the rest. Personally, I'm hoping my reaction will be more like Harry's, but I won't begrudge Massawyrm's his sour grapes. It's an honest review, and I can appreciate that.
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Bc right now your claims of "happy ending" being different from the novel make no sense. The only thing I didn't like is that Manhattan doesn't have that final convo with Adrian about "nothing ever ends". However, I think Manhattan's final disappearance works better in the movie than the book.
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is some of the funniest fucking shit I've read in awhile, and makes turning Watchmen into a movie completely worthwhile.
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it didn't have that scope that something massive was happening, even though more places were hit. It just wasn't there, the conspiracy gets lost midway in the movie, then they come back to it. Goode also doesn't sell Ozy well, he doesn't have that tone you get from the comics that this was the only option. The scope is missing.
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The Dark Knight Returns vs. MacBeth? I love movies as much as the next guy, but come on man. I can't wait to see this, even if it does include hours of flaccid penis. Oh my, I liked 300 as well. Does that say anything about me, Massa?
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still believe it, would've been better. Goode is the worst one out of all of them.
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Macbeth is an overrated play with a shitty uninteresting story.
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The other book.
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Was that visual necessary? Ewww.
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Some sort of countdown, like the Doomsday Clock in the novel, to let the audience know we're getting closer and closer to something awful happening. I didn't get that sense of foreboding in the film like I did with the book. So when the big event happened, it was kinda like "oh yeah." Needed more buildup.
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that's what I mean by the scope and the seriousness.
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Honestly, how many people actually know the comic book and will notice a difference?
Then why adept Watchmen at all, right?
I was huge comic book fan back in the 90s and I never read it.
But I am going to see the movie tomorrow.
Why, because I am a comic book fan.
For me it was a sacrilege to see Batman go around and killing all his enemies in the movies (except for Dark Knight of course).
But nobody really cared and the movies were huge successes.
Changing the fundamentals of iconic characters is something I cannot forgive.
Changing the ending of a story (I don´t know) might not be such a bad idea.
Maybe it works, maybe it doesn´t.
Will see tomorrow. -
The ending really didn't change much guys, lets get real. I thought it was hilarious that the 'S.Q.U.I.D.' was in the movie (you'll see it on Veidts screens right before the devices go off *spoiler*), but felt that the movie was soulless pretty much throughout--I mean, it was a LITERAL translation of the material, not an adaptation. While I mostly sat in awe of the visuals, I usually spent the time thinking 'wow, that scene/dialogue was EXACTLY the same in the book' and to me, that slavish devotion to the material ended up hurting the picture.
However, I brought a fan of the superhero genre (but she's only read the first chapter-ish of Watchmen) and she went pretty nuts about it...so I guess we'll have to take this as a win, and hey--at least they'll reboot it and remake it in about 6 years so we can try again. -
They have PENISES there!!!!
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Under the Hood + The Times They Are a-Changin'= perfection.
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I don't get what makes Silk Spectre and Nite Owl any different to Rorschach when they are breaking bones and killing guys in the alley fight. Dan caring at the end wasn't needed, I loved the fact he just accepted and was an asshole by the end of the book, didn't even care that Rorschach died. Dr Manhattan's voice - I still hear the sound of the JLU Jonn Jonz, deep. He still had that otherworldlyness and that distance from humanity but too calm and serene, needed to be deeper. Veidt was just wrong all over. The ending didn't work. NOT PUTTING IN THE BAR SCENE! WHERE RORSCHACH BREAKS THE GUYS FINGERS FOR INFO! Unforgiveable. That's the scene that shows Rorschach is a BADASS, in troduces us to him being a BADASS. However I am surprised they translated the first two issues almost exactly.
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Maybe like, 3 instances throughout the film of seeing the metaphorical doomsday clock click closer to midnight would have helped with the foreboding. Also would have fit with the theme of clockwork and watches and all that jazz. It definitely needed something to let the audience know time was quickly running out.
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Okay, I haven't been following every piece of news about this flick, but I loved the book, and there's something here I don't understand.
The Comedian was murdered because he was on to Ozy's squid-o-matic shenanigans, yes? So, if there's no squid, why is the Comedian murdered? Seems like that small-ish change to the ending would really impact the rest of the story, wouldn't it? -
In the book Dan doesn't know Rorshach died. But maybe he assumes he froze out in the arctic.
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What the fuck? He didn't kill anyone in Batman Begins either. Second, Watchmen is not just a comic, many many people outside of comics have read it. Watchmen isn't just about iconic characters, it's also an iconic story. Changing the story which is part of the comic does make a difference. This isn't serialized storytelling. Think son.
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Who told you it wasn't? Dan stands there and tells all the people to calm down, etc. All I learned at my early screening is that the world loves a sociopath.
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He had that ambivalent look on his face, and his voice sounded detached, and yet sad and somber at the same time. Like he's saddened by the fact that he can't relate anymore. Especially when he tells Laurie "I don't know what stimulates you any more."
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they just say he knew. and that's it. fucks up everything. doesn't come together well.
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is probably right all along.
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the scene from the first issue when he says "friend of mine died today" and he breaks the fingers of the dude that makes fun of his smell.
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Granted I haven't seen the film, and you probably want an answer from someone who did, but in the book The Comedian learned about Ozymandias's plan, and the list of people given cancer to discredit Dr. Manhattan. He sees Moloch's name on the cancer list and breaks into Moloch's house ranting about it and Ozymandias has Moloch under surveillance and learns that The Comedian knows. Just because there is not a squid doesn't mean The Comedian can't learn why the plan in the movie is and can't talk to Moloch about it leading to his death. He isn't killed because of a squid he's killed for learning something he shouldn't and yapping his mouth about it.
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Opinion can only go so far, sir. Call me when your real analysis is posted.
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...Finally a review that summed up my feelings on the changed ending in a way I was to inept to relate. I'm going to see it, of course, but now I'm 100% sure my view will fall between what Massawyrm so ably put across and "Kill Hack Snyder for this Cinematic Abortion!"
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In fact, you state many times that it is great except for a few minutes at the end. Who cares? Most who will watch this have never read the comic book and most simply won't care that your precious ending was altered. God, I hate obsessive fanboy whining - "It wasn't exactly like the source material so I can't like it" God, you sound so lame.
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I would expect better for the greatest drama on television.
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suck bad. wrong director,
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Mar 04, 2009 11:57:55 AM CST
Ozy should've been played by a big Movie Star.
by alanmoores_squidblood
I re read the Graphic Novel this week, and just had a feeling that Snyder should've gotten a well known mega star to play Ozy. I just get the sense that Matthew Goode doesn't have the Charisma or chops to pull off the whole Megalomaniac thing. I could be wrong, but I doubt it.
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Wow, "son", you are the one calling Macbeth overrated.
Sure, and the Pyramids are just a pile of square rocks.
You have to judge a piece of artwork in the historic context as well.
And how has Watchmen (the comic book) changed literature??
Just because it might be a comic you would recommend to everybody doesn´t make it a masterpiece.
Just an exceptional comic.
Oh, and the "real" Batman would never say "... but I don´t have to save you either.". That´s pretty close to murder. -
For people who have not read watchmen like myself. Dr Manhattan looks cool. The rest look like silly ripoffs of DC's justice society. The clips look silly to me. I am reserving judgement until this weekend, and I am afraid your could be right. How often are really GOOD movies released in march???
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He didn't compare the comic TO Hamlet, as one idiot said above...he said "it's the Hamlet of comics." Meaning it's one of the best bits of writing in that medium.
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That's right...The Comedian goes crazy because of the insane plan that Veidt has created, the alien creature...
Doc M has fought next to The Comedian in Vietnam where The Comedian comments on Doc's loss of humanity...The Comedian would not be that surprised if he found out about Veidt's plan to frame the Doc...maybe he's seen to many blue dicks on an island. -
I don't mind a little bit of personal information in a review, but I didn't need to know that Massa has difficulties maintaining an erection. A little too much information if you ask me.
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... you might actually want to see the movie for yourselves people... And enought with the squid. I would also like to see it too, but it's not gonna happen. Deal with it. I just hope that it will be a good ADAPTATION. And you know why? Cause it's an ADAPTATION, and the graphic novel will always be better. Simple? So if don't like, please don't watch it and stick to it's source material.
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you guys and your long winding reviews/rants kill me sometimes, especially when its all due to the last 15 minutes of a film. was it really so bad that it ruined the whole film?
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So which is it?All of you would likely insist that we see this movie before we have spout criticism. Good call there! But then half of you say if we differ with your opinion on liking it, then we're some variation of giant asshole dickheads buggering fuzzy baby seals with extra large frozen fruit punch popsicles. Surprise! And, predictably, if we love it then we're low brow jackasses, spitting toilet water on dead birds in a crusty birdbath, through the missing gaps in our rotten teeth.Nothing more fun than these types of TB's with all the passions and insistent on joining and thus validating their opinions. "The only people who disagree are blah blah blah"...Indeed!Or maybe we can yet again boil down the argument to not context, which would actually be worth talking about of course, but simply the presence or non-presence of some thing or another at the end.Fun for kids and adults!
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sometime on Friday night. I'll keep my expectations low. Maybe the fact that I didn't waste ten bucks on the damn thing will make the film tolerable.
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remember that word?
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I loved the ending. I feel like it held the same feel in the comic book. Maybe you thought Owl's and Silk's ending scene was too happy without enough information why they were doing what they were doing. And that might be a valid point.
But the ending isn't all happiness. Did you even see the tug of martini Silk Spectre I took. You know her life is going to be shit after Laurie leaves. She's an alcoholic and will continue her degradation. That's not all happy puppies and floating butterflies, my friend.
I think it was a solid movie all the way through. The only thing the lack of squid screwed the pooch on was the non-explanation of Bubastis's origin, which couldn't exist because of no genetics program. But that is small potatoes if people are going to be truly pissed off.
All in all, I give it a 3 1/2 star out of 4. It wasn't a perfect movie -- some of the acting was off, felt forced and some of the dialog wasn't delivered truly. But I'd argue the pacing of the film was far superior to The Dark Knight and that's saying something spectacular. -
It just isn't possible. First, there is always the amount of material in a book that just can't be condensed into a 2 hr movie. Then there is the imagery, even when its a comic book, trade paperback, or graphic novel, everyone reads those images in their own way. People scour those images repeatedly and develop there own meanings to them, something that a movie viewer doesn't have the luxury of (at least not until they have their DVD or BluRay disc). I'm not saying that there aren't times when a adaptation gets it right, sometimes even transcending the source material, I'm just saying that even then, there are people who aren't happy with it. To me, a movie adaptation is successful if it gets people who would never have read the book in the first place, to seek it out and do so. That's all I have to say on this matter.
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If I'm correct, I believe Alan Moore based most of the characters off the Golden Age JSA.
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if Massawym would actually explain what it is he doesn't like about the ending instead of creating a vague and unhelpful comparison to Hamlet. We can handle the spoilers.
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Mar 04, 2009 12:18:57 PM CST
Assuming the average AICN reader knows the plot to Hamlet
by olsen twins_fan
is very generous on your part, Massa. Great review, thos.
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The movie ending is more tragic because in stead of having to decide to go along with Ozy's plan he forces their hand. They have no choice. Dr. Manhattan, instead of say "hey, you're right. you're plan is a little misguided but you're right" Dr. Manhattan's happiness, conection with humanity and ablity to help humanity are ripped from him with no choice. Then even witht the sacrifice that he makes it could be all for nothing if the jornal gets published. Again, if you can't see the merit of the movie ending it's because you are already predispoded to hating it because it doesn't live up to your internal idealization.
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hey dumb cunt, you haven't even read it. And it might not blatantly show to you but Watchmen is HUGELY influential, not just in the comic world where it was directly influential but even in various novelists. And it is a masterpiece, you haven't read it, so how the fuck would you know that it isn't? Time Magazine called it one of the top 100 books of all time, that's books, not just comic books. What Bats did was true justice, it isn't murder, even in the comic books he overlooks things because he didn't directly have any involvement in it, he might not have killed the 4 bad guys, but he maybe shot a wall that killed them later. And that isn't murder, if you think letting the World's most dangerous man be saved who you know will escape and just try and destroy humanity again, then you are a fucking idiot. And Batman isn't an idiot.
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Why do I feel like I'm the only sumbitch on the planet that could truly give a rats flying fat ass who gives a shit dipped soaking cock about anything remotely pertaining to Watchmen? I didnt read the comic, I couldnt tell you a fucking thing about any of it, and the subtle unambiguous irony is, I kind of like it that way. Maybe it's an age thing, when the hell did the Watchmen comic even come out?
Everything Ive seen and heard about it during this media blitz seems to me as though Watchmen is someones hodge podge idea of ripping every comic book character of the last 50 years, putting their own ass scent on it, and calling it high art. Where is the guy that's invisible ONLY when people aren't looking? It's like, insert random newly created comic book character here. Glowing blue guy? check. Owl man? check. Guy with swishy ink face? Check.
Someone enlighten me please why I should care about a bunch of independent comic book characters that seem like ripoffs of their A-list counterparts? -
Snyder’s been taken to task for making alterations to the source material and I’ve read other reviews that fault him for adapting the film too closely to the original book so there you have it. What’s interesting is that most people, even the detractors, have admitted the film is dense, layered, nuanced, and probably requires multiple viewings to fully digest which is, ironically enough, the same way many people respond when reading the comic for the first time. Incidentally, I think the most important aspect of the ending in the comic wasn’t the squid or even the potential outcome of Ozy’s plot but rather Rorschach’s journal being discovered and published, meaning that despite their best efforts, the truth will find a way through the deception of those in power. It also reaffirms my theory that Rorschach is the purest hero in the story. I guess that’s why I’m not all teary eyed about the omission of the squid.
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if the audience believes Cloverfield and Godzilla, why not make a little subplot of genetecists being kidnapped and then dropping a huge cloverfield-esque monster in the middle of new york.
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and those who championed Jackie Earl Haley back to an acting career. Just think he could have fell between the cracks never to be heard of again without their help.
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Yeah, it's in there... a lot. In fact there is more than one scene where Manhattan slpits into multiple beings and you get to see 4 blue dongs on screen at one time. Personally I could have lived without so much but I'll give Snynder credit, it only appears in medium to far away shots. Never close up, so unless you just happen to have a smurf fetish or are just fixated on it there is so much more going on in the movie that you really don't dwell on it. Besides Snyder makes up for it by having Malin Akerman naked.
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If they played it, I didn't see it. I ran for popcorn once everyone was in their seats. I know they had some dumb Seth Rogan Mall Cop trailer to begin with. Considering the movie had just started by the time I got back into the theater, I don't think they had time for the ST trailer.
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Mar 04, 2009 12:28:24 PM CST
at least they didn't keep the blue energy slingshot from the scr
by celluloidkid
oh my would that have sucked
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Just to be negative? You just want to make sure everybody knows you don't give a fuck? The story is actually very rich and there is more going on than any movie could produce. Read the fucking story than post.
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not only will there be 35 extra minutes of Manhattan's blue cock, but it will be erect the whole time!
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Seriously dude. Care or don't care. I think the rest of us will be fine either way. I will, however, take the time to enlighten you that there is no such as "subtle unambiguous" and you liking the fact that you haven't read a book isn't "irony".
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I mean "no such thing". EDIT BUTTON!
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that's a weak argument. People have made valid points as to why the new ending doesn't work.
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That's fair enough man, I'm a huge Trek geek going back to the 70's, PLENTY of people could give a rats ass about Star Trek.
I'm not being overtly negative or hostile , I genuinely want to know- why all of the love? What does this material do that so much more seeming original material it heavily borrowed from did better?
As someone unfamiliar with the material, when it explodes on the screen abruptly it actually sort of looks ridiculous. Like second tier comic characters massing together for what exactly? That's the point, what exactly am I missing here? I don't read comic books anymore, I'm too elitist and pretentious I guess hah hah. So I need everything explained to me and condensed in small sentence fragments as though speaking to a 5 year old. Grandpa tell me a watchmen story! -
Maybe not on the scale of say - Speed Racer - but the way it comes across to non-believers, those of us who have never been exposed to Watchmen before (and by that I mean nearly everyone), they've marketed this film on the basis that everyone should know and care about this bunch of characters.
To the average cinema audience and even to those of us who love film in general but are not into Comic Books, this will only survive with strong word of mouth. If it really is that good a movie in its own right.
See Iron Man for the perfect strategy on a lesser known Comic Book Movie.
Maybe the film really is that good, but that would be down to having a great script and the director knowing how to put a film together 1st and foremost and not just a moving Comic. Those are the traits that Zach Snyder needs to make this a success (See also The Dark Knight). -
By having the Blue Man Group reject take the fall for Veidt's crime just like Batman taking the fall for Dent in TDK. What a blatant rip-off!
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By having the Blue Man Group reject take the fall for Veidt's crime just like Batman taking the fall for Dent in TDK. What a blatant rip-off!
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I typed them in! See above
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batman as christ....BULLSHIT...and gordons speech made me wanna barf
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You need to type a without the spaces where you want paragraphs.As to your other point it may well flop. There may well be people who hate it (and I might turn out to be one of them) but at the end of the day I don't give a fuck if anyone likes it but me. Watchmen was made into a movie and god help me I hope to love it.
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the ending should make one go...wtf dan should not see rorshach killed, as his death should appear empty and alone ozy should be presented as the aging fanboy that he is, questioning his god dan should not be able to pummel on veidt and the doc should not be made into a vengeful god but i gotta disagree about one thing...the attention to detail in regards to the minor characters was really what made the book stand out, and made the reader care about what happened in nyc at the end...remove that, and you remove the soul of the story
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iron man tells a very simple story its basically batman without the parents death, a much cooler bruce waye, in a much cooler suit
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. . .you need look no farther than Evangelion. Everything aside from the last 2 episodes was compelling, action-packed, and filled with fairly decent character drama. And then it all collapsed into a Freudian exercise in self-conscious psycho-babble that would make an LSD trip look sane. The bad ending didn't make all the great stuff that came before it any worse, but it sure as hell made the whole series less palatable and enjoyable.
That being said, I don't think that Snyder's ending could possibly be as terrible as Evangelion's. . .which means that, in all probability, the movie will work out. Hopefully. -
Another example of a film where the ending just absolutely destroys any good will you had leading into it.
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So I just skimmed the review.
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did you like the incredibles? do you watch lost, heroes, the 4400 did you watch burton's batman have you paid any attention to the change in pop culture over the past 2 decades? most everything can be related back to watchmen it was the popularity of that comic and moore that opened the door to more brit authors writing american comics it was the book that opened the door to the comic industry finally getting rid of that dumbass code more than just literature, the book is a very important part of overall pop culture
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I thought they got Adrian really wrong. He's too creepy and not amazing and awesome and cool enough - he should be the smartest, most athletic, most brilliant man on the planet. Here he's a scrawny, creepy businessman who's clearly up to no good from the moment you see him. Even though he says he's not a comic book villain at the end, he's far more of a comic book villain here than he was in the comic book.
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the first thing to understand is Watchmen isn't ripping of other superheroes. It's satire and a real world take on "what if people did dress up like owls and fight crime". Watch the movie or read the novel for a better understanding as to why. It will answer all your questions.
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who fear how it may make them feel if they make eye contact with it
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So, what you're telling me is that Devin Faraci's overwrought review was nothing but a big Snyder Corporate cock suck. Is that it?Just wanted to be sure as I'm still indifferent to this movie. I feel bad for some of the longtime fans though...
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No, actually what Massa is telling you is his opinion about the film Watchmen.
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I just thought again about Arcadian Del Sol hunched over his copy of the book counting penises and it's still funny.
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That's a HELLUVA lot of accolades and credit there man, a helluva lot.
If Watchmen is this cultural iconoclastic movement starter, why has the majority of people never heard of it? Myself included. Putting it on par with the Beatles, Elvis , and dare I say even Star Trek in terms of cultural impact and significance is a mighty tall order. I dare say my hole I live in isn't quite THAT deep wow.
Well, for those that love the material I seriously hope the film is a success. -
But I still think they haven't 'sold' Watchmen at all well. If it's as complex and literary as some make out, they should have tried to convey a little of that to the masses (dark/complex super heroes are in at the mo). Instead, it comes across as another costumed comic book flick. A camp x-men, with the girl in latex and a bald blue man with his cock hanging out. My only knowledge of Watchmen comes from these talkbacks. Trust me, reading these comments with no idea of the context, it sounds completely ridiculous. A bit like reading a Star Wars talkback would be if you'd been in a coma for 32 years. Oh, and thank you em_tee_em
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sar-casm1. harsh or bitter derision or irony.2. a sharply ironical taunt; sneering or cutting remarkDoes this help?
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I was JUST asking one of my co-workers what the definition of sarcasm was... it's like you read my mind.
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You're right, citing why the movie ending DOES work is weak argument. What was I thinking? You're obviously not one of the people who have already decided to not like it.
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In the comic book the fascists are able to come to power because the peacenik Labour Party disarmed Great Britain which allowed the Soviets to start World War III. Taking this little bit of information out of the movie changed the whole context of the story IMMENSELY!
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Sorry! I just seems some people post just to be a negative
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Shut the fuck up, you've been anti nolan for a long time now, and this random hate that isn't so random is pathetic. Any chance you get to spit vile on Nolan/Bale you take it. You're wrong. It's better than you. kill yourself. Stop being a fat loser cunt.
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A typical Hollywood ending? I saw the movie on Monday and I'm sorry Mass, but I thought the ending was just as somber as the end of the novel. This movie was great, and I walked out being blown away.
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If you read my posts you'd see I have fucking seen the movie. I saw it yesterday. Fucking idiot. The ending is fucked, that is it.
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I don't understand the squid-obsessed bunch. I was more annoyed by Superman with a kid (maybe four to five films down in a series, but not in a re-launch of franchise).
I also believe the DVD release with extra material may shut up many of the naysayers. -
Does anybody know exactly when big screen films turned into long commercials for DVD's?
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SPOILER BOY!
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And it's a pretty good comic. I like it ok. The writing, especially the dialogue, is alright. Nothing fantastic. That said... if this movie isn't better than the comic, then the movie probably is not that great.
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do it!
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Is it really rough like in Monster's Ball? Or is it more like it was in 300?
I only ask because I may go watch it with my Pap Pap and it might be a little...awkward or weird...I can't deal with anything having to do with sex mixed in with my parents. Am I the only one who is like that? -
I remember it not being so forced in the book...and i'm referring to the scene where they're fucking on Archie. I felt like they could've excised that scene entirely and given more than like 37 seconds to the trip on the ice ship on Mars...I'm sure it's not a 'ship' but you guys know what I mean. That sequence was so profound and awesome in the book and it was literally like a minute and a half long...aside from Laurie puking. Weird editing choices.
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If that were true, then NOT reading this talkback would make you SMARTER.
wait for it.... waaaaaait for it.... -
Having Dan see Rorshach killed adds some emotional investment which was greatly needed.
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I could watch your parents have sex all day.
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the instant you see the squid, please POST HERE RIGHT AWAY. I eagerly anticipate your 'uh guys that squid WAS kinda silly' post, and hope its still bakery fresh when I gobble it up.
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Just thought I'd ask.
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and just to play both sides of the geek-o-drama, here's a defense of the squid I have not yet read:
If there is no genetic manipulation of a squid and a whale and god knows what other DNA, then the whole aside about Ozy having created an actual mythological creature just sorta becomes a 'oh well that's nice I guess... moving on...' moment in the movie.
Correct me if Im wrong, but the genetic manipulation thing regarding his lynx-liger-whatever-thing was to make the squid-monster itself somewhat feasible. If you dont have the squid, then why have the transporter-accident kitty-kat? -
I have to admit... I was mocking you earlier, but you just about made me spit soda with your response to banzai.
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What is this Hamlet of which you speak?
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make out with me. Right now.
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Thousands of my unborn children died on your moms face last night. Sorry.
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rorshach dies as he lived fuck the audience need to be emotionally invested in the scene i hear that people cheer at certain rorshach scenes....christ, that is depressing i love the character, but if presented correctly, you are supposed to question why you come to love a total sociopath
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the world is filled with morons not my fault that people dont see the roots of current pop culture and yes, watchmen did all that wouldnt have been neccesary were it not for the fucking comics code that the destruction of ec comics...but thats the way it is
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...cause Rorshach is the badass that all geeks secretly wish they were. O f course, if they happened to meet a real life Rorshach, they 'd still be running.
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...that he is, hands down, the best reviewer in this website. He doesn't let his fanboy enthusiasm get the best of him (unlike Harry, who has zero credibility) and is able to articulate complex ideas. He can view the film from different angles and express a layered opinion, instead of just jizzing himself over something cool-looking. He understands subtext and meaning unlike most other reviewers on this website. Good on ya, Wyrm.
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and zack was not in charge of the ad program over the years, my opinion as to whether the movie should even be made changed when i first read it, i thought it would make a brilliant movie but that opinion changed, much in the same way as moore's did initially, when it was first optioned, moore was all gung-ho for the idea but as he got older and got screwed over by both comic book and movie companies, that opinion changed the deeper concepts of the book, the fact that it is in reality, a retelling of the history of the american comic book, cannot be translated to the screen who killed edward blake? the fucking comics code...thats who
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Mar 04, 2009 2:40:49 PM CST
This review is similar to Massa's No Country For Old Men review
by jordo
Essentially, Massa loved that movie until its ending. I ended up loving No Country, so I'm hoping I will also love Watchmen.
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...who worships a snake, but he put it best. It's a comic:it's made a certain way and it's meant to be read a certain way. Now we got an adaptation. Surely you didn't expect it to be perfect? And if you read Snyder's interview, he changed the ending, cause the studio would not allow such a brutal and horrific depiction of destruction, especialyy post 9/11. I don't agree, but at least Snyder FILMED Watchmen. He tried and he did it with love. And for that, i respect him. More when i see the movie.
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I killed you.
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but I get blue balls alot.............
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Don't tell me how it ends.
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Ligers are real, not mythological. If that's what you meant.
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... Do yourselves a favor and read V for Vendetta, League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, and Whatever happened to the Man of Tomorrow (the best Superman story). And yes, they are by far better than their movie adaptations. Though V for Vendetta was not that bad.
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...I've held my tongue till now, but I always though the original "squid" ending was stupid, didn't make sense, and quite honestly ruined the ending of the book for me. It was a stupid 80's comic book cliche, and was probably intentional because Alan Moore is an ass hole. I would bet the far that if this movie came out as an "original" with no source material behind it, and it included the "squid" ending, everyone would be bitching about how the ending did not make sense. I know I am not the only one who was put off by the orignal ending!?
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massa your reveiws are shit
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Will do!
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Will do!
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Doube post...
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... ALAN MOORE AND HIS SNAKE GOD PROCREATE!
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anyone who has watched the progression of this book to film, knows that zack tried his best but when a studio hands you 100 mil to make a movie, you cant make one that only appeals to the fan boys and grrrls never mind that on the stump, zack would say that if the movie brought more to read the novel, his work was done think that is what he told the suits at warners? fuck no they dont give a shit if the book sells even one copy as they have treated dc like a bastard child, selling off rights, allowing other people to totally destroy properties...all for that wonderful green stuff i think zack is a true fan of the book....i think he really does get the nuances and multi layers to the story, and i think he really would like it if the masses really did understand why the comic book is important to popular culture (christ, have you heard his wife talk? the dude married a gal who gets it...not just as a crass producer, but someone who digs the fact that her hubby is a geek) zack hired actors who wouldnt put themselves above the source material...think cruise or reeves wouldve done that? law maybe, but not those two fucks the biggest problem for this project were the poducers, gordin and levin...two absolute twats who neither understand the source material, nor really give a shit...all they know is that zack made some really pretty pictures i do know one thing...right now in northhampton, there is a tall bearded man, sitting by his fire place, having a tea, and laughing his ass off
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Hollywood to remake "The Greatest Story Ever Told." Rumor has it that the producers have decided to change the ending.
Producer Hacky Hacksman was quoted as saying "I mean the ending is such a downer. During these hard economic times people want uplifting endings. We are going to put in a big karate battle at the end. It's a little known fact that in the gnostic gospels it says that Christ was a red belt or at think that is what my script girl said."
Rising young star Chia LaBeef is in talks to star as the lead "Haysoos". "You gotta hit that hispanic demo nowadays." Hacksman was reported as saying. -
... which it will probably will, we won't have a WATCHMEN 2: ELECTRIC BOOGALOO - THE SQUID STRIKES BACK.
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want to live your life in constant pain? fuck that
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This movie is really splitting the vote. Hate it or Love it or have mixed feelings. Strange reading some of the reviews for this.
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PASSION OF THE CHRIST 2: JUDGEMENT DAY http://tinyurl.com/oca4k
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Thanks for everything, Julie Newmar
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...performances better than the movies deserve? Or performances so good you wish everyone stepped it up a notch more?
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because after seeing the film last night and reading his review today... I really don't get what his disappointment is with the ending. I even went back and flipped though my copy of the source material and all in all, it was really quite similar (whole no-squid thing aside)...the actions and motives of those involved...they're all there in the film. it wasn't some typical Hollywood happy ending.
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...that the comic (and hopefully the movie) made you think. Now how did it come to the point where all the thought is provoked and targeted to one thing only: Squid?
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i LOVE it when batman shoots walls.
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vs. Predator, Requiem.
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Watch Harder
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I thought the comic was pretty genius when I read it, and figured there was no way they could do it any justice in 2 and a half hours. I was right. But only partially, because if Snyder had the time to do it "right" he'd still fuck it up cause he's all style, no understanding of storytelling at all, fails to set things up properly, fails to reveal things in interesting ways. He fails on almost all levels. Not only that, what we get is a total mish mash of slapdash shit that has no weight, no meaning, no consequence. In the first 40 minutes all the characters speak to each other as if they've never spoken to each other before. And the fact they are all so young REALLY hurts the entire concept behind the movie. Veidt is in his late twenties? What did he retire from crimefighting a year before? It's RIDICULOUS! Malin Ackerman is horrifying as Silk Spectre II, like really really really bad. None of the actors though are given much to work with. Snyder and his hacks completely ripped away at the story so all we get are glimpses of the real story. Which is why I say nothing has weight, cause you don't know why anybody is doing anything. And it seems as if they all have super strength, it is so stupid. The only good parts somewhat were Jackie Earl Haley and Dr. Manhattan. But they ripped the soul out of Dr. Manhattan's backstory, and pretty much every other character. It was the little details in the book that made it great, Snyder was clueless as to how to make a film version of that. It's possible, but not in his hands. The only sequences that work are with music and no dialogue. Unlike Fincher and others, Snyder is stuck in music video shit. He has no clue how to tell a coherent detailed story with meaning and real emotion. Everything felt forced and weird, mainly cause everyone is so young so there's no weight to any reunion, you don't even really know how long they've been retired, again though, nothing makes sense in the film if you haven't read the book, and if you did read the book you'll sorely miss all the shit that made it great. The squid is the least of the film's concerns. Making it be atomic Dr. Manhattan bombs all over the world was stupid, but not a dealbreaker. Everything that came before was, save the opening credits, sans music of course. Oh right, music. The song choices were horrible. I understand the need to use 80's music in a film set in that time, but it doesn't work at all and makes the film into a bad satire and creates unintentional laughter. And they used a Philip Glass cue from Kooyanisqatsi for the Dr. Manhattan Mars sequence. Obviously temp score that Snyder realized was better than anything he could come up with originally. So they use someone else's score for someone else's movie in their own film cause they know without someone else's music the sequence is nowhere near as good. The music elevates the sequence way beyond what Snyder is capable of as an artist. The whole movie is a mess. Gugino thinks she's doing a vaudeville act. The Comedian's line readings are awful, that Morgan dude is a really bad actor. Just look at his little speech to Doc M after he shoots the Asian he got pregnant. A better actor could have so nailed that moment, but he totally misses it. His make-up is awful too. A perfect example of how bad Snyder is is his handling of Rorshach finding Molok (yeah I know I am spelling their names wrong, fuck off) dead in his apartment. The scene is so clumsily handled, set up so poorly, the reveal rushed. The whole movie was rushed, yet felt incredibly boring. Don't even get me started on the AWFUL impersonations of Nixon, Kissinger, Pat Buchanan, Eleanor Clift, John McLaughlin. AWFUL AWFUL AWFUL!!! Warners should be ashamed of themselves. I see a big opening weekend followed by a huge drop off. The movie sucks. Simple as that.
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You decided to hate it before you even saw it.
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It;s impossible for anyone not to like such the best film ever made in the history of this Universe or any other right? Talk to me in 2 years you douchebag, once the hype has subsided.
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Keep defending the casting of twenty somethings for people supposed to be in their forties and fifties. It's not like casting a young Batman, the whole POINT of Watchmen is that they are old and past their prime coming out for one more shot at glory. The age of the actors is important.
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I think you've misread the nuclear war subplot of V for Vendetta. At no point is it suggested the war starts because the nukes are pulled from England; that was a minor issue, at best. It was years after the removal of the nukes that the war came. The whole point of the nukes being pulled is that it *saved* England from the worst of the conflict and isolated it to the point where the extreme right wingers could stand together and make half-believable claims that fascism would be the nation's savior. There is satire in the actions of the peacenik left leading to facism, but I don't think the left is to blame for war itself. Or maybe I'm the one who misread it.
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The Search for Rorschach.
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Mar 04, 2009 3:32:34 PM CST
So You're Saying You Totally DIDN'T Get The Ending Of The Comic
by laserpants
Holy shit. Even Dave Gibbons said the Squid was a MacGuffin and didn't matter to the story. He also said, that the film is pretty much dead on to the comic HE CO-CREATED. If the guy who helped make the thing likes the adaptation, then, uh, yeah... I'll allow you to fill in the blanks.
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just like I thought it would. A Self-important mediocre sack of shit with idiotic slow-mos and a director that thinks he knows better than the source material. First he fucked up 300, and now The Watchmen. I hope this fucker bombs as much as I think it will because I'm sick of slow motion action scenes. It just makes it boring and silly, just like 300. Way to go Snyder, you dumb fuck.
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I guess I'll make up my own mind when I see it and see it I shall.
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I'm just going to upload all of those videos into my Windows Movie Maker and watch the damn movie at home. They've shown so much of the movie already it's worthless at this point to pay for it.
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...action scene where I can see what the hell is happening to any of the current crop of shaky cam, poorly edited close-ups that we get in most action films.Also, I still haven't seen the movie so all my opinions are just in a general sense.
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And yet your response to Grievey doesn't change his point. Of course it's possible to like or not to like anything for any reason, but you pretty much start your review with, "I knew it was going to suck and I was right..." You had made your decision before you drove to the theater. That's a pretty big uphill climb for any film to overcome, and again I'm not saying you're wrong especially since there is no subjective truth to opinions.
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not this overrated jumbled mess of a property and Rorshach's voice sucks Manhattans big blue balls
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And I couldn't disagree more with everything you said. Admit it, you expected this to fail, you walked in wanting to dislike it, didn't you? Because that's exactly how your review sounds when you go so far as to criticize the use of a Phillip Glass track.
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Just saying.
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I really enjoyed the movie. I can't wait to see the directors cut on DVD. I never read the book but kinda knew what the story was about. There were a couple of geeky fanboys who booed the movie at the end. But most of the audience applauded. I really need to read the book now and check out the dvd of the novel. I don't know what the squid was and really don't give a fuck if they left it out. I just really enjoyed the movie. Isn't that what it is all about?
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Mass is wrong 95% of the time. Just read the review and assume the opposite!
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there's an utter shocker.
is there anything that guy doesn't like? -
Figures u fanboys wouldn't b satisfied. How bout u see the movie before u take one reviewers bloated review...ok ?
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Who watches the Watchmen, watching the Fashion Bug?
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Muppets Take Manhattan.
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Sephirod, good call! A truly GREAT classic Superman story written by Moore.Anyone who's seen Watchmen...can you tell me if Ozy's triumphant "I DID IT!" is still in there? Just curious?
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Swatchmen
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Cocksmen
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You want a graphic novel story arc?
Try Spider-Man tales, from issues 20s through '60s or something along those lines. And Fantastic Four issues in the #40s range up to late #80s...
And Thor....and....
Or O'Neil/Adams-or-Novick Batman/Detectives....or...
Did Watchman turned heroic ideals upside down? Yes. But did it leave you hopeful? Not much, if at all. Same with movie. Though it's quite a film, despite the flaws.
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You say in the beginning how detail are not important but the tone but then your main arguement is the change in the detail of the ending if the same people die that are supposed to die what is the problem? Your whole Hamlet analogy contradicts your 1st paragraph.
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...as if it's a universal thing made my week.
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Hmm, almost with you at that point Massawyrm, but you cant say shit when you have an even more revealing image as your avatar! :)
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Are pretty negative. Major critics don't seem to like it. I loved V for Vendetta, so who the hell knows. It's all up for debate, and if it least looks good why not go see it and find out for yourself. I would rather have an epic failure of a try then a safe retread of a movie.
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For fuck's sake!
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It turns out we were wrong. Shakespeare didn't write comic books after all. Thanks James Westfall.
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HEED THE OMENS
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and I like and own V for Vendetta
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Kenneth Branagh's Hamlet is what I get out of this review.
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Bear with me, I'll try to explain it, though it's one of those things that's hard to explain. You see, when one man looks at another naked man, be it on screen, in a gym shower, or whatever of lifes wacky occurences that inexplicably places you infront of a naked man, there should be no weird feelings of awkwardness or uncomfortableness. Because a heterosexual man should be utterly neutral towards something he is not sexually attracted to. ONLY, and I mean only, if there is some level of subconscious attraction towards what you're looking at, an attraction that you don't want, or can't accept. To better illustrate my point, let me put it this way. You're not attracted sexually attracted to dogs, right? Probably not. And what do you feel when you look at a naked dog? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. THAT is sexual neutrality. A truly heterosexual man should have the same reaction of sexual neutrality towards another naked man, providing of course he's not trying to hug you.You've probably been operating all this time under the assumption that it's normal for a naked man to make you feel oogie inside, and that all guys feel the same way, but they don't. Am I saying you're gay? No. You love girls? I'm sure you do. The two aren't mutually exclusive. All I'm saying, is there's some level of attraction there, otherwise mens schlongs wouldn't make you feel uncomfortable.
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I tell ya, that guy surprises me sometimes. Not because he's wrong, but because he's not afraid to go against what other critics might think.
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Mar 04, 2009 6:04:07 PM CST
James Westfall...no one said it was written by Shakespeare
by brians life
I can't fucking stand that line. "It's not shakespeare." A DER A DER A DOODILY DOOO!We know that. We don't want it to be Shakespeare. What we want is competently written characters that we care about and motivated actions all directed by some one with a unique vision and eye for cinematic storytelling.And I'm not even talking about Watchmen, as I haven't seen it yet.But seriously this whole "it's not Shakespeare" is basically the same as saying "it doesn't have to be that good." Which is bullshit.It's this moronic "It's not Shakespeare" conceit that gives us more Fantastic Four and less The Dark Knight.
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Whenever you look at something, your mind immediately identifies it, labels it, cross-references it with associated things, puts it in it's appropriate slot, and so on and so forth. And when you look at the naked dog, the category of 'sexual object' is not being associated with it at all, because, for total lack of attraction to it, it is simply not a sexual object to you. And it's the reason can hang around in a locker room with a bunch of dicks flopping around and still make small talk. Because they are not making a sexual association with the dicks, ergo it does not make them uncomfortable. And if you're uncomfortable looking at a man's weener, it's because your mind is categorizing that as a sexual object.
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Mar 04, 2009 6:07:59 PM CST
This movie is going to be a beautiful junior high book report
by reflecto
Painfully detailed, maybe beautifully decorated on the exterior, but ultimately realized and delivered with deadly boring immaturity and leaden slowness.
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I'm more concerned with all the details surrounding the creation of the squid. All the forshadowing Moore put in, to make the end richer. I like the idea of Veidt using Dr. M., but all those above mentioned details make what he does so much more epic and calculated. So like with most films nowadays, we're paying $10 to see a 2hr 40min trailer. Then we'll wait 6 months to pay $20 for the "real" film...Lucky us!(I'll be there Friday at midnight...probably see it twice)
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Should probably check their sexuality
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I saw it last night and loved it! Very true to the material. Best comic to movie adaptation ever! However, I was not thrilled with the score. And the whispering...Jesus the whispering. Maybe I'm just getting old but between Rorschach, Dr. Manhattan and Ozy, I couldn't hear half the dialog. Thankfully I know the material.
With all that being said,it still kicks ass for all those that dig the comic.
My buddy, who never read the comic came out of the film saying his head hurt. He said there were too many storylines going on that it became quite confusing. Another guy commented he'd never get those 3hrs of his life back. -
Ozy should be the very essence of charisma and intelligence. He's so far ahead of the rest of the heros (even Dr. M) they don't even have a clue what he's up to until its way too late to do anything about it... and then shows them that he'd have beat them anyway, even if they had got there in time. If Ozy comes across as villainous, effete or insane, they missed the point of the character. If you don't walk out of Watchmen wondering if Veidt was right, the book has no meaning. He and Rorscarch are obvious parallels and need to both be compelling, powerful poles which demonstrate the how complicated this sort of superhero morality can get.
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...I think that you are making as broad a generalization as he is.
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When Massa refers to Watchmen as "comic's Hamlet" and keeps comparing it to Hamlet then saying "For fuck sake, it's not Shakespeare" becomes a valid counter-argument. I love comics as much as the next geek but they are not fucking literature.
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will I like the movie or not?
I've heard of the graphic novel but never read it. Since seeing the FIRST trailer for the movie, I've avoided finding out anything about the story or characters. Basically, I want this new universe to be as fresh as possible when I sit down in the IMAX theatre on Friday.
So...will I like the movie or not? I don't actually care what damage gets done to the novel, no matter how much it makes the fanboys cry like little girls....I'll read it later [maybe]. For now, I just want to know if it works AS A MOVIE! For all the Wyrm's crying, I still can't tell. -
Apologies. I'm just used to seeing people in like the Wolverine talkbacks saying things like "Lighten up, it's a comic not Shakespeare."Can we agree that his is a statement in which some one is saying these properties do not need to be taken as seriously due to the medium being adapted?I think that's ridiculous. The idea that these characters do not require as serious an approach as others kinda pisses me off.Also, your comment on comic books not being literature. I feel like we're in an argument about semantics at that point. I mean, I have read comics that have had a much more emotional impact on my than, say, Twelfth Night has.So, in that regard, one could argue that there is little difference in adapting Shakespeare and adapting Watchmen. Both take the right mix of characterization and emotional storytelling. Just my opinions.
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is frightening, but then again a lot of those insecure talkbackers could only focus on how 300 was a homoerotic film first and foremost and could only see it as gay and it scared them to look at buff guys with not much clothes. So Absurd.
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Natalie Portman is hot, but can't act.
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being the be all end all comic Massawyrm. Any self respecting comic fan that isn't jusr riding the hype train will tell you there's other work that's just as good if not better than Watchmen. It's all entirely subjective anyway. But I can tell you for a fact, it ain't my fucking Bible or anything. Just shut the fuck up. Hamlet? Just shut the fuck up.
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Not because I always agree with him... that would be a fickle reason... but because he doesn't care what anyone else thinks of a movie, he only cares what HE thinks. He has no hidden agendas like almost every other critic out there. And he actually loves movies.
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agreed
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You guys all know me so well. I loved the comic and went in to the screening optimistic but wary of the casting choices and the relatively short running time. Yeah, so hateful I know, god forbid I think about the property they're adapting.
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He is a great creator, but an absolute prick of a human being.
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If you require being 'interesting' to get pussy...you will dislike this movie.If you own a copy of 'Trout Mask Replica' just to play on your turntable when you're playing musical pissing contests with your other 'interesting' fucking friends, you won't like it.Being interesting is not about being contrary. Being a contrarian, when most people agree on something, is done. That's why you, yeah, I'm talking to all the 'interesting' people out there, why you bought those fucking shirts from Snorg.Seriously, I read the negative reviews, and it's a matter of 'I like Oreos, and these Chips Ahoy cookies? Not fucking good. Least, not as good as Oreos'. Where the apologists say 'Thank GOD there are Oreos out there! I LOVE OREOS, and these are the BEST OREOS EVER!' I like motherfucking cookies. So, when I see the negative reviews getting these retarded verbal ejaculations from the miserable cunts who hate on everything and revel in the disappointment of others, I get the feeling that they can't get laid on their own merits.I also don't buy people just loving this without misgivings. The source material is so fucking dense and layered, and requires sections of film to be dedicated to documentary style backstory.By all means, continue the vitriol...occasionally, it's funny, and accurate. But shitting on stuff, well in advance of seeing a completed product? Why, that's being a fucking miserable cunt. If this were the Old West, I'd say a beating, short of murder would do some of you dummies good.
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You know what ISN'T subjective? The fact that you are wrong. No comic written can touch Watchmen. It's a scientific fact.
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please limit your posts to 25 words or less. Your thoughts aren't interesting enough to warrant any more of my time than that.
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Sorry, here's a shorter one: I hope any children you have die, any future children you have are stillborn, and that you are killed in a fire.
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"Well, the sand filled vagina between my legs can see the future, and says Watchmen sucks."
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Was Massa actually being more honest of a reviewer here? Was Harry merely more forgiving of the ending of the film? I gave Harry a rave for his review and ditto for Moriarty but given how polarizing opinions are on this movie I cannot help but wonder am I to be the odd man out and just feel torn by the extremes of opinion here? If so, that would be disappointing on balance.
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I'm gonna keep this brief and just...It's a decisive moment in the history of Western civilization.
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anymore anything with a 100 million budget he gives a pass anything from a already SH!T director you know he'll shit on he's turned into a Government mule (no pun intended) of sorts Wyrm reminds me of Mel Gibsons Character in Conspiracy Theory Entertaining but crazy as a bed bug. I trust Vern and Moriarty the most.
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2 best posts I've seen.... your first post then your 2 responses to magnum opus....hillarious!!! Everything u said is true
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Because it's not exactly like the comic this AICN person doesn't like the movie. Weak, as per usual.
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I TOLD YOU! I TOLD YOU! I TOLD YOU!
I TOLD EVERYONE WEEKS AGO THAT THIS WOULD BE THE BIGGEST PIECE OF SHIT MOVIE SINCE BATTLEFIELD EARTH!
No one listened... This movie is utter crap! Fucking gay looking homo super heroes with a no name cast and some guy who looks like Robert Downey Jr. = EPIC MEGA FAIL SHIT! -
So since you're so right I guess ur mommy will breast feed u and give u that sponge bath u been beggin for, huh? The guy "who looks like robert downey jr. Is jeffrey dean morgan , and he could give downey a serious run for his money acting wise....so stfu
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I don't think it deserves all the vitriolic remarks here by any means--this isn't to say I went crazy for it--this totally played better to people who hadn't read the book...and honestly, if it makes them want to read the book, then what's so wrong with that? Sure, there are some strange gripes I have, but the JDMorgan hate is pretty unsubstantiated...and while I didn't think Malin Akerman was particularly good, I didn't think she was bad either. Never really distracting...fuck, I hated her character for being such a whiny pain in the ass, and if anything, she made Laurie way more tolerable.
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...might be one of the lamest remarks i've heard here today. JDMorgan sure has some charm to him, but no one will ever touch RDJ in that department. I seriously think the casting director had to be like 'We want Downey...but we'll settle for Pa Winchester.'
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Mar 04, 2009 8:24:47 PM CST
Is everyone who reviews for AICN now a 8yo twittering school-boy
by fleet
I can't get through a story/review without a reference to sex, penises, homosexuality, or the writers incessant need to define and clarify his heterosexuality... I am SO FUCKING OVER reading that shit... this site has become a frat-boy newsletter, written by movie geeks who think they know better... change www.aintitcool.com to www.notanothermoviereviewsite.com and insert jokes about boobies and wangs here...
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...for his post on sexual neutrality... Holla!
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Maybe a slight exageration on my part but we wouldn't b hailing him as such a great actor if he continued his drug use and faded away so kudos for him. No film needs big stars as much as it needs actors that believe in the characters and not just the paycheck...just check out michael emerson's portrayal of "ben linus" on lost.....I'm convinced he thinks he's linus when in character, totally believable and spooky
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CLICK HERE FOR FAKE WATCHMAN PRAISE
http://www.comicvine.com/watchmen/65-40393/6-more-watchmen-clips/92-385242/ -
No matter how many times he combed through his copies of US Weekly he couldn't find the guy who plays Nite Owl = EPIC FAIL!
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...and let the grown-ups disagree about the squid and other fanboyish, geek stuff. But seriously, gtfo Sovikos.
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Oz's plot is to prevent the creation of Dr. Manhattan and restore the balance of Mutually Assured Destruction, which he does by creating a temporal wormhole back to 1959 and warning Osterman about the accident.
As with the book, Doc shows up, but is powerless to intervene, and obliterates Oz (instead of Rorschach...my favorite touch). The remaining three Watchmen dive through the wormhole to avoid the ensuing destruction of their timeline (Osterman is "rescued"), and wind up in OURS, with a sequel-friendly Rorschach hinting in the last line that the he's going to carry on his "work" here.
Now THAT, my friend, is a happy ending...I'll reserve judgment until Friday, but any ending with the masked madman dying can't be happy...
http://tinyurl.com/dxezky -
That's right, you give fellatio to dead, rotten, maggot-ridden bears. Oh well, your opinion is now worthless as you are, as a human being. In fact you are now lover than mankind, you are a sub-species just below lichen, or moss, or that scum that settles at the bottom of a stagnant pond. Yes you are pond scum... well good luck and godspeed pond scum, you will need it...
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I love Philip Glass, when I watch what should be the best sequence in the film, I want to watch it, not be thinking about the film they took the music from. I love Dr. Manhattan and his chapter on Mars. So of course I am forced to think about Koyaanisqatsi during the majority of the sequence. Snyder can't be bothered to create his own music for the sequence. An example of his laziness.
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Is "Doodaladaloo Doodaladaloo Doodaladaloo (WAH! WAH!)in D Minor", first included on his 1976 album "Suck It, John Cage!"
I kid the avant garde...I do. -
but I know one of you is right, and fuck the rest of you! Man, Watchmen talkbacks jumped the squid weeks ago.
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Ladies and gentlemen, the WIN quote of this tb.
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Shit, I love Jim Hendrix, but now when I watch that sequence in "Watchmen", fucking Zach Snyder is FORCING me to think about the Vietnam War and every other instance in which I've listened to Hendrix. SHIT, the first song I heard on the radio after I broke up with my last girlfriend was "All Along the Watchtower" and NOW because Snyder is such an original hack that he just HAD to use that song, I'm forced to remember that moment!
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It couldn't possibly be in the film bc Snyder is a big fan of Glass and really likes that track, now can it? No, its GOT to be because he "can't be bothered to create his own music".
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For a man who has watched a lot more movies than anyone can do in one lifetime, he has given Watchmen a perfect score.
I think many geeks are just too obsessed with the comic that they could not shrug off the uneasy feeling that it should be more like the comic book. Possible? Yes. Make it a 12 hour mini-series on HBO like Band of Brothers. -
They were granted unnaturally long-life by the Valar. One of the other names for their Island, which was eventually swallowed up by the sea, was Atlantie.
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Not only do I feel like the coolest person in my social network (pssh, no change there! zing!) but trying to describe the movie is funny. Here's the final outcome, kids. There are going to be at LEAST 3 camps for this movie: 1. The non-readers who love it. 2. The non-readers who are texting the whole time saying shit like 'omg, why did you take me to this awful movie with the giant blue dick? this is so lame, lets go see Beverly Hill Chihuahua 2 instead, lololololol' and 3. the readers who are going to leave the movie feeling kinda meh. I can't imagine any of the hardcore fans of the book are going to go TOO nuts since the adaptation isn't so much an adaptation but rather a LITERAL TRANSLATION of the source material. Anyway, will someone buy my single off of iTunes? Is that totally inappropriate here? http://tinyurl.com/c743km
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D'OH!
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I think the problem is that this was too much like the book--I honestly think that we might've enjoyed this more if it was a bit more loose with the adaptation. Maybe i'm crazy. I didn't care about the ending change because I really didn't feel like much changed beyond 'not a monster, it's osterman.' Honestly, I didn't want them to try and cram that side-story into the almost 3 hour picture anyway. It's one of those things that probably would only work on the written page. Maybe i'm wrong...but maybe i'm delicious too.
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Your opinion is not wrong, nor is it you crazy. It's delicious!
I've read the book, and after watching Watchmen, I wish I never had read it, since the film, as it stands, is awesome, if the comic book never existed. It's kinda difficult to accept something you've loved for many years only to get that "duh!" treatment on film. I desperately want to love the film, but I'm still, well, having this comic hangover. This could explain why the film would never end as a source of constant debate among geeks. -
and I apologise for going waaay off topic. But has anyone read the script for guy ritchies's sherlock holmes? Since the guys here at aicn dont really review scripts anymore (red tail aside) I ve read the March 2008 draft (the final one written before ritchie did a few revisions and began filming)And based on images and info it would seem that almost all of what I read is still in the script.If you have i would like to hear your thoughts/opinions. Anyone?
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This means that Richard Alpert has already gone off-Island to recruit him, and it ALSO means that he has already started, or has taken over, Mittlelos Labs, which becomes Mittleos Biosciences... bc they wanted Locke to come to their "summer camp". Which I'm sure DHARMA has no clue about. But Horace Goodspeed met Ben's dad outside of Portland... ... And supposedly near Portland is where Mittlelos Labs is located... curious.
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You hit the nail on the head with that last one. Good use of the hammer, friend. I know i've said it a billion times, but my fellow screener only had read part of the first chapter and she went pretty crazy for the movie. Funny enough, she's now plowing through the book...we're very industrial here when it comes to reading.
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I feel like i've been missing out for the last 7 years...reading all of this is funny, but having a shot at the nerd title is even awesome-er...one might even say awesome-er-est. http://tinyurl.com/c743km
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I know Moriarty doesn't write for AICN anymore, but since Hitfix sucks, it'd be good to read his analysis on Watchmen, which I suspect would also be
semi-negative as Massa's is. -
I totally fail this Talkback.
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on the big screen for the first time. After that, I'm gone.
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I'll probably kneel over in front of the screen and take a photo with my shoe then leave. Enjoy your Kraken-less ending suckers!
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Sorry, whoever that was--bravo. We did this really shitty 'music video' in college for 'The Blimp.' The director made it into a jumbled piece of shit...but most of his projects usually sucked anyway. Wow, just so weird to hear the words Trout Mask Replica together.
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Actually, WATCHMEN was in most parts better than THE DARK KNIGHT.Masswyrm's review was unfair, biased and dumb.
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... that doesn't iclude Avatar and fucked eyeballs? Can that be? Is there still hope?
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....a few weeks ago, I promised a very kind talkbacker (whose name I forgot) to try to never do that silly AVATAR thing again.Maybe I will do it again in December, but for now, I stopped.Again, concerning Massawyrms review: I kinda get his point. But I also think that it's pretty unfair to kinda trash the whole movie just because you didn't like the ending. That's what I meant with "unfair, biased and dumb".As for my part, the ending worked.
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I think this may be a movie where, what the critics say isn't going to matter.
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have you read the old avatar scriptment? if so, what do you think?
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"taken on its own, Zack Snyder's "Watchmen" is a profound work of art, a beautiful, deliriously weird, meditative spin on a genre that is as American as jazz." So, yeah, he liked it.
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Mar 05, 2009 2:01:14 AM CST
specifically motoko, im wondering what you think are its strengh
by southafricanguy
I think it has some really imaginative ideas and some potentially startling imagery. Also think the action set pieces have the potential to be really amazing. However the story was a bit bare bones, imho I think it needs to be fleshed out more. Also the characters were a mixed bag, ranging from potentially interesting to one dimensional.
Im really happy to hear that Cameron wrote the shooting script with Laeta Kalogordis (a talented script writer)so its possible that the weaknesses of the scriptment hav been sorted out.
And anyway if you read the scriptment for aliens (on the aliens special edition dvd) its really different from the final movie. So I expect Avatar to be too -
Jesus, the LAST HOUSE ON THE LEFT remake earned more visibility. Maybe it has been declared a "tax shelter" and the studio is declining to pitch it.
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no I haven't1.) Doesn't make too much sense to read an old script of a movie that's still in production and due to many many changes.2.) I try to stay away from spoilers.
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...it really wasn't that bad.I really hope that even avid followers of the graphic novel will go and see the movie OPEN MINDED. I for my part am pretty thankful that Mr. Snyder managed to give us such an intelligent, violent, thought-provoking, stunning piece of cinema.
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and all people paying to go see this shit
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...why don't you just shut the fuck up, you monkey, and go back watching Speed Racer or some other infantile shit?Because WATCHMEN clearly is an adult film in every aspect. And you clearly have not seen it yet.
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are looking forward to? What about it excites you?
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Saw this in London a couple of days ago and its not bad at all. I've read the comics but i'm not a huge fan, they are good but not some great works of literature that some make them out to be.
I sat next to a guy who has never heard of the comics so it was interesting to hear his views.
The film is good and obviously has some differences to the comics, but the major one (the ending) actually works well on film. I wasn't sold on having a giant squid turn up in a movie as a good idea and this new ending works well. Some performances are good and some are not. The make up is awful but otherwise the film is wonderful to look at.
The guy next to me liked it but he said he felt like it was a little confusing and the pacing was slightly off (i have to agree, there are points when its moves along wonderfully but there are times when it becomes painfully slow). He said he found it an enjoyable comic book film, but he prefered Iron man and the Dark Knight. I still think the Dark Knight is the best comic movie made to date, but this is a good film that deserves to do well. The problem is I don't see it performing well globally. It'll have a good first week at the box office and then drop off quite a lot, hopefully it'll get its money back though, it deserves to as its a wonderfully ambitious film that deserves a watch. -
Mar 05, 2009 3:17:57 AM CST
and for the record I read the scriptment a few years ago
by southafricanguy
when it seemed highly unlikely that it would ever be made due to the special effects technology not being advanced enough to make it. Im still not sure it is. Thus I did nt see the harm in reading it. But as I posted above, its obvious that it will have changed quite a lot.
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it has Cameron's classic structure (think aliens,T2) and it will be by far the most epic thing he has ever done (lotr epic). No shortage of action. There is some real anime stuff there that I am realy curious to see if they can be pulled off with todays special effects
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Havent seen it yet , so don't know how bad it is. But with the big screens, clarity of high def, digital recording etc feel fucking sorry for make up artists, got it much harder than their predecessors
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of anime concepts and imagery, with pulp serial buck rogers/john carter of mars sense of adventure. With a little bit of the matrix and 2001: a space odessy thrown in.
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Just saw it. Still digesting. All you guys will tear it to shreds.
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Believe me. FAR weakerAnd are you trashing the lights of that one? No.
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where ya been? Im still waiting to get some answers dude..
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Aintitcoolnews is negative about pretty much everything, so it's hard to take a negative review from a site that does mostly negative reviews seriously. It's you don't get to be a reviewer on this site unless you can find the negative. Must be an interesting interview process. "What do you think of life?" "IT SUCKS." "You're hired."
See movie, judge it yourselves. Take reveiws for what they are, someone's opinion. Newsorama and Aintitcoolnews are the worse places to go to get balanced opinions because they are both determined to hate pretty much everything. (And they both love to begin their hatred with variations of "I wanted to like it, but. . ." I'm always shocked with they actually like something, personally. -
Not because it is a bad movie or comic or anything (I liked the comic and I haven't seen the movie so I won't pass judgment) but because AICN treats this as if it was 9-11 or something. How many fucking stories on the Watchmen do we need? Talk about overkill.
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thank you for that. I also like watchmen and cant wait to see it, but im just sick of all the constant stories on it
Which is why I just want to talk about something else. Are you interested in guy ritchies sherlock holmes continentalp? -
anyone online and want to talk about upcoming movies? Im really interested in Cameron's Avatar, Mann's public enemies, guy ritchies sherlock holmes, and transformers 2 and gijoe (these last two are complete guilty pleasures, most likely both will be cheesy and goof as all hell but im a child of the 80s so I kind of have to see them just so that i can marvel at how Bay and Sommers will attempt to out cornball each other)
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which is why I was trying to discuss Avatar with him. But I guess he has a life.
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as no one here at aicn seems to do script reviews anymore (red tails aside) I thought I would talk about the script for guy ritchie's sherlock holmes
Its quite faithful to the character as he appears in the books. He boxes, uses a pistol, is a master of Baritsu, and he is a manic depressive when not working on a case.
And Watson is a thin war veteran who is something of a ladies man.
They give holmes a great foil in Irene Adler, who is every bit his equal, you know just with boobs.
Also, the script really makes London a character, there are numerous references to aspects of London life and famous London landmarks -
...which I why I can't post here too often... :-)Actually, I thought there was nothing to discuss about AVATAR. It will simply blow me through the back wall of my theatre, just like WATCHMEN did yesterday.
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The plot basically revolves around holmes and atson battling a british aristocrat thats into blackmagis/satanism, basically he's Alaister Crowly. And the first half sees them capturing him watching him be executed, and then solving the mystery of how he returns from the dead and seems to possess supernatural powers
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the strenghs: the script really nails Holmes and Wasons relationship, and it is an accurate portrayal of them as they ae written in the books. RDJ should be great as Holmes,Mcadams should also be great as irene adler. Jude law..meh, I can take him or leave him. Hope he can finally be interesting in a movie. There are also some fairly good action set peices,that could be cool if done well.
downside: the plot is quite straight forward, and the mystery not all that complex, actually its really not even all that interesting. You just know the resolutions to the mysteries before they are explained. Also, the plot is basically very similar to the Zorro movies, nothing we have n't seen numerous times. I found this aspect of the script to be quite dumbed down. Which might make real holmes fans of the books really pissed off. As there the mysteries are always really clever and sometimes complicated to figure out -
frightening...
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oh and the villain is a complete one dimensional cartoon.no background, motivation or anything compelling. Its going to take a really good actor to make this part interesting
And lastly, who knows if guy itchie can do an action movie, or if he can only do british gangster flicks. Lets remember swept away and revolver, god those were painfu movies... -
yeah there is lots to discuss about Avatar, did you read my posts about it?
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but no actually I dont, im just really bored nd felt like talking about movies but noone responds so I assumed I was the only one left here.
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but no actually I dont, im just really bored nd felt like talking about movies but noone responds so I assumed I was the only one left here.
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how was watchmen, it has nt come out yet in Korea. Starts tomorrow only. what would you compare it to?
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Avatar? Or tell me what to expect with Watchmen. Is it worth checking out? Can the style be compared to anything else? How does it rate against the dark knight?
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But apparently it's like a Jonson.
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I know the ending before I've even seen the movie OR read the comics.
I had a cance to buy a great edition of the graphic novel around Christmas time, but I thought "Nah, credit crunch, presents to buy & mainly the movie wasn't so far away, so I could see that first, go in not expecting anything & maybe get the graphic novel after & compare the two then.
But NO. Every fucker has to review it compared to the comic book version. So I now know the ending to a film I've yet to see & a book I've yet to read.
Fuck this, I'm gonna move to South Africa & talk to myself. -
Every review I've read so far about the Watchmen movie has compared this picture to the original comic book - and how it's lacking - instead of rewiewing it on it's own merits.
I wish someone who's never read the comic book would review it.
Because, having never read the comic myself, I don't want to know what the movie is missing, I want to know what the movie HAS and why I should go see it.
- And why do they have a guy running around nekked throughout the movie? Who, except Gay guys, wants to look at a dangling shlong? Geez!
- Zack Snyder must belong to that same "club" of directors that Joel Schumacher and Brian Singer "belong" to. -
That's what I just said:-(.
True though. -
...only that it has more balls and even more subtext.
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It is very interesting to me to read the folks who are saying Ozymandias was "sucessful" and created a Utopia. I had a completely different take on the ending. Ozy notes thathe was "right in the end," to which Manhattan notes that there is NO ending. The scenes showing strife beginning again despite the unifying presence of the squids is showing that there is no quick fix. Humankind needs to change themselves over time, no by some external force. Rorshach was going to tell the truth. To him that was more important than Ozys plan. No matter how good or bad this movie is, I'm looking forward to it. I have a feeling it will be thought provoking even if the ending is not to my liking. A good movie autopsy can be great fun.
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In trying to convert Massa's Hamlet ending analogy to watchmen terms, is he saying Doc doesn't kill Rorshach and instead Rorshach kills himself?
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God there are some repressed people on this board.
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I dont know what the fuck Massa is talking about, having read the book and seen the movie. Squid aside, it happens just about the exact same way. I dunno what this "Happy ending" is he's talking about when its just like the book's coda too.
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even if the end comes up short. it looks totally exciting to me. i can't wait to be immersed in that world. hope the ending works better for me than Massa
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I can't believe there's all this shit over Manhattan's cock. Not only does this make you homophobic and possibly gay and aashamed, but you guys sound like just the little bitches who would bitch "it's not the same as the book" if his blue cock wasn't there. It's in the god damn book, so look down between your legs and deal with the fact that there are penises in the world. God, thank you Snyder for having way more balls then all these pansies.
And Second, T4 has no chance of blowing Watchmen away. Are you an idiot? T4 will be amazing if it can save the franchise, which maybe it will. But saying it'll compare to Watchmen is like saying G.I. Joe will be better. One is based on an amazing graphic novel. One is a big studio erection with hopes of a toy line.
Fucking cock, haters! Just so you know, v-card holders, there's a sex scene to and it's pretty long, so you better ask your mom if you can watch it. -
This is why they don't let 'true' fanboys into Hollywood, just like they don't let them into the creative side of the comics industry, and especially why very few are allowed to breed. And when one slips through the wires, they give their kids goofy friggin Anime names and shit, then their kids grow up to be high school gunmen and hobo street fighters. "Waaahhhh...they didn't fit my favorite line into a 3 hour movie." "Waaahhh...his blue cock is bigger than my blue balls." Just be thankful somebody still feeds the niche. Comics were at death's door before Hollywood stepped in and kept them afloat, so they could suck the marrow out of their intellectual property.
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THIS IS BY FAR THE BEST SUPER HERO MOVIE PERIOD, FUCKIN HATERS
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i saw it om monday. as a fan of the source, i can agree that snyder gets the material, but I'd argue that the whole thing is trying too hard. I can almost only see it as interesting to people who have never read the story. the incessant game of "spot the panel" throughout the movie is even more distracting than Dr.M's manhood. I left not knowing how I felt. It's interesting, certainly, but ultimately pointless as it has less to say than the comic book and it says it less artlessly... If I sound absolutely mixed in my opinion, that's because I am.
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Spot on. Theirs a reason geeks don't create comics, music, or movies. They have no creative bone in their bodies. All they do is collect and obsess over other peoples creations. And than criticize from the sidelines knowing nothing about how these things get made in the real world.
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And I enjoyed your review Massy. While i disagree with your view on the ending I do understand that even subtle changes affect how some people pereive the totality of the subject matter. That being said. I cannot remeber a feature film that so closely was adapted to its written origin.
There were parts of the film that really helped things "click" for me in ways that were more illusive in the comic (graphic novel, for those that will get all upest over the term i used). I really agree on the aging make-up thing, especially on IMAX where there is absolutley no denying the fact that the prosthetics were a bit underdeveloped. But really, it's a minor detail in a monumental adaptation. I really cannot imagine a better transition from page to film on this matter. There were several moments of just hypnotic amazement at the extreme level of detail brought out by the filmmakers.
I thought the music worked very well. I even giggled at some of it because it was SOOOOOO appropriate for the moment. There was an issue with the sound mixing on the dialogue which made some scenes difficult to understand in dialogue. I experienced the same exact thing in The Dark Knight, by coincidence, where whenever Oldman was speaking it seemed to get drowned out by either score or atmospheric noises in the shot.
Haley is AWESOME! Never would, or cloud, I have imagined a better performance out of anyone on his character. I was pretty equally impressed with Goode, Blake, and Crudup's jobs, They ARE the WATCHMEN.
To be fair Ackerman and Wilson were fine, Not to mention that Ackerman is totally hot! I just never really connected with their characters in the book so they did fine by me in the film.
There are always so many litt nitpickings one can make on films derived from written materials but the reality is that this movie succeeeds where others thought (or hoped) it might fail.
To the squidophiles, I coined it, I think the substitution is amicable, in fact it worked out better for me in reality.
There is a running joke in my booth about Dr. Manjunk and his wand. Is it too much? I say whatever. Who cares. It's a harmless blue neon penis. I think it's really a nonentity in the story and in reality I really don't think it chews up as much screentime as it has been reported. I think they show it during three or four scenes. It didn't effect me other than it made me smirk. We had been joking about the Manjunk here since the first publicity poster article posted on this site, so it just feuld it.
If there is any public dissent with the picture I am certain it will be for the unrelenting wieght of the films look at violence.
There is some real ultraviolence that would probably have made Kubrick squirm. All of it directly from the book.
What was interesting was that Snyder did use slow mo for some of the normal fight scenes, which I liked, but when it came to the visceral troubling scenes involving the worst atrocities he just held the camera on, where, I think, ANY other director would have pulled away. These moments, to me, were worth the cost of admisssion. Not because I love gore, but because they reinforced the observations made by the charachters in the film on how society has denigrated and degenerated into an apathetic pile of negativity. Snyder hit a home run with the concept.
I think those true fans of the story will appreciate the film. I guess, to Massy, that while I think I understand where you are coming from on your interpretation of the ending of the film, I just did not see what you saw there. I saw it as faithful in the end to the book, in it's look and feel. You may have a different perception. I respect that. This film does do the one thing that I think all important (Yep, I said it) films do. It will inspire a lot of conversations, I am not just talking about fanboy nitpicking, but conversations about society, violence, and people.
I hope many people watch this film. I have a sneaky suspicion that the only detractors will be those who are really sensitive to violence.
Thanks for the review.
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I swear there were line breaks and spacing when I typed the last post. Sorry guys for the long paragraph.
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It's HTML down in this bitch. You have use without the spaces when you want a paragraph.
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I mean the paragraph tag works, but that's about it.
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Ok, I think there definitely is something to the "protesting too much" over the blue dong thing but...and follow me thru here if you will...I have absolutely zero sexual attraction to dogs (not even feminine anthropomorphizing versions in cartoons tho Jessica Rabbit is a hottie but not actually a rabbit) but seeing a dog with the creepy pink lipstick pointing at me freaks the shit out of me in a kind of primordial way. As in, is that furry molester walking over here and what if he somehow manages to put that fucking pink thing on me in some tricky dog way? (like the kamikaze crotch sniff thing they do). Then, I'm gonna have to kill him and then my friend will get mad that I killed his pervert dog with the perpetual pink lipstick hardon. (no, not that I killed the dog using a, or the dog's, perpetual pink lipstick hardon but with a bat or maybe an umbrella or something).Does that make one a closeted cross-species homosexual? (it can happen, George Carlin's dog used to fuck his male cat in the ass..Carlin had pictures!!!) Or just someone creeped out by the possibility of being touched by dog penis?Better yet, I don't see anyone asking the dog wtf is going on with the random/perpetual erections?If there are any dogs on this TB, can you please elucidate what the fuck is up with that?
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http://tiny.cc/WflSf
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...how Arcadian wants to gobble Dr. Manhattan's blue wriggler so badly. He'd swallow that engorged noodle faster than you can say "jackie robinson". Yep.
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and hopefully the holywood idiots,wont fuck another masterpiece again or at least not at the immediate time.
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and then end up being a messy post-diahrea anus?
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Actually, no-seems pretty simple. Smackfoo likes seeing dicks waved in his face. Arcadian, don't. Seems pretty simple.
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--that was some funny shit! no really, it was. EPIC FAIL GAY SHIT. The froth runneth over amidst your words. It made me laugh. More, please--
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I've already seen it twice. The acting is great, special effects awesome, fighting cool, opening credits the best ever.
The dick isn't in too much so some of you 12yo schoolgirls don't need to worry about being offended. The blood and guts won't worry you, of course. -
And I will say you liked it way more than I did. Alan Moore was right.
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Seriously, what are you talking about? No squid, and the resulting threat is Manhattan instead of squids from who-knows-where. Where does the rest of that come from? Dan goes a little nuts, but it's otherwise right from teh book.
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