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Harry is also FIRED UP!
I like cheerleaders. In Junior High in Austin, there was this little group of them that liked to torture me, because I was the fat kid at school. Slapping my ass, pretending to come on to me. I turned the tides by grabbing their asses and thanking them for the blowjob the night before.
Later, in High School... I actually lost my virginity to a cheerleader, whose virginity I was enjoying. And now... over 22 years later, I'm married to a 22 year old ex-Cheerleader. So... to say I like cheerleaders... well, its an understatement. That said, FIRED UP was completely off my radar till Massawyrm and Capone's reviews. I hadn't even bothered to look at the trailers, because I just assumed it was a BRING IT ON knock off.
This is no BRING IT ON knock off.
This is a hilariously chaste cheerleader sex comedy about two guys. No, nix that. These are likable alpha males, smart, witty and gifted in athletic and mental faculties. They also love to get laid. They have worked their way through their own high school's crop of lovely ladies. And when they're faced with going to El Paso for FOOTBALL CAMP - a two week desert where there is no hotties at all... their minds begin to wonder to other possibilities. Cue- overheard conversation of cheerleaders talking about cheer camp and 300 other girls that are better than them and want it more!
Our teenage Lotharios decide to become Cheerleaders with the express feeling that they'll get to pound the cream of teenage cheerleading pussy for two weeks, rather than the grit and grime of two-a-days.
This could very well be the most brilliant set up for a Cheerleading Sex Comedy ever. That said, it does lose that title to PRETTY MAIDS ALL IN A ROW (1971) starring the amazing Rock Hudson. If only because that movie is R-rated. This film is hilarious. Quint, RoRo and Johnny Wad were all laughing pretty hysterically throughout. The reason?
Nicholas D'Agosto & Eric Christian Olsen.
I first became aware of Nicholas D'Agosto in Jeff Mahler's sick and disturbed INSIDE, where he played a peeper that gets the MISERY treatment... only worse. When I saw Nicholas on HEROES as Hadyn's flighty love interest... I knew I liked him. Now with FIRED UP, he's cemented his place as an actor that I'll keep my eye on.
This is the first time I've really seen Eric Christian Olsen with a lead role. He was funny in BEERFEST as Gunther, but to be honest... he hadn't really made an impact till now. And damn. He reminded me that Jim Carrey used to be this funny. Seriously.
However, it isn't really anything that these two actors did separately... it was how well they worked together. The dialogue is sharp, funny and witty. It moves at a breakneck pace, reminding me that comedy dialogue is best when sped up, making you choke back your own laughter to hear the next funny bit... which is right on top of each other.
Also - keep your eyes on Juliette Goglia, who play Poppy in the film. This 13 year old spitfire is fucking hilarious. Again, this will be the first film you'll notice her in. She plays Nicholas' younger sister. Her character is like the "Brain" from PINKY & THE BRAIN - only... the younger sister who is painfully aware of everything. She knows that her older brother and best friend want to go to Cheer Camp to tag pussy, and she's totally willing to help them... if she can get her older brother's room at home with its own bathroom. POPPY nearly steals the whole film, which is crazy, because there's so many characters that are so funny in this crazed improbable funny flick.
Philip Baker Hall is great as Coach Shit Shit. The Football Coach who has a passionate love affair with the word "Shit".
And John Michael Higgins' Coach Keith (the head of Cheer Camp) is just a crazy fucker he should be neutered in this film. Seriously.
Then there's all the hotties. Holy shit, if you were some sort of crazed alpha male that could actually land this grade of pussy... THIS IS XANADU! The scene where our twin drooling dicks arrive to Cheer Camp... it's heaven for wet dreams.
I won't bullshit you, I laughed loudly throughout the film. So did the audience, so did my friends. SCREEN GEMS has put out a lot of shit films rated PG 13, this is not one of them. Is it because I have a carnal history with cheerleaders? Well, that certainly didn't hurt, but the reality is... it's just fucking funny.
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muah ha ha ha ha!
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The closest I will be to first, yay
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Not really interested in a movie where the protagonists are popular jocks who want to get laid. That's kind of like watching TMZ and hoping Paris Hilton gets the bracelet she wants while I'm eating Cup o'noodle for the third in a row. Plus, can Eric Christian Olsen even pass for a teenager anymore? Doesn't look like it to me.
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why does every review on this site have to contain graphic depictions of blowjobs or cherry popping these days. is it that essential to the review? we get it: some geeks actually have sex. you can stop trying to prove yourself to us, you're married ffs
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Now where are the fuckin' DVD reviews!!!!!!!!!!!!?
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Not that I'd figure you for a frequenter of running events (or maybe you are) but Austin has been on the national news for some sonic booming and fireballs falling from the sky.
Did you witness these events?
Did you cause them? -
no - it was just a TRANSFORMERS 2 promotion I dreamt up with Paramount
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Feb 17, 2009 4:33:21 PM CST
What I would rather read than a review of "Fired Up"
by the reluctant austinite
How about the "weekly" dvd write-up! There's a really cool documentary out this week about the history of television horror hosts called "American Scary," and I was hoping Harry would review it. But "Fired Up" warrents a Harry review? Seriously?
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did it for me. "I like cheerleaders." HARRY, YOU DOG!! AWWWOOO!!!
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First there was skywriting, now there is skyfireballing with terrifying sonic booms!
Brought to you by Paramount and Aint It Cool News.
To those of you who don't know what skywriting is, look it up. Also, it might be worthwhile to look up in the sky everyonce in awhile. Sometimes those sky messages can be pretty darn hurtful. -
One of the best milf on screen fantasies ever!
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What, next you're going to tell me he doesn't live in his parent's basement? What is this world coming to when we can't even trust people to live up to their stereotypes? Geek, indeed!
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Sorry if I take some time to view things I actually want to watch here at home. Actually enjoy some of the titles I already have. You do realize you really do come across as a complete prick on Talkback to me. Even though I've only ever treated you nicely. And yes, this is a movie that needs awareness because it's likely going to die at the box office this weekend and is actually worth checking out. WHICH BTW is my primary job, not the DVD column.
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over a few of the DVDs from the last 3 weeks? I really do despair.
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Seriously, this just proves that Harry likes EVERYTHING.
Jeez---if it were rated R, MAYBE I'd go see it. -
That's all.
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There was some bad post timing by myself....
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When you give a review like this, this shit has to have an inkling of merit.
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Not many things make me laugh. Either that or there aren't many good comedies. I liked "Nick & Norah's Infinite Playlist" but that wasn't really a comedy I guess.
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Why do you feel the need to tell us you're married to a 22 yr old ex-cheerleader? Do you honestly think anyone cares when you lost your virginity and to whom? It reveals a lot of issues on your part, Harry. Your need to prove (or claim at least) that you're not a total loser is in and of itself a bit pathetic. Just give us some weekly DVD reviews. That alone will prove your worth.
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Thought the review read fun & fast. Once the movie becomes dvd- I'll prob buy it.:)
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Sorry, but I just can't stand when people feel the need to publicly flaunt their sex life.
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Harry, if they ever make a movie of your life story, I hope they include the bit about your young ass getting grabbed by hot cheerleaders. Hell, it could also be the next animation at the top of AICN.
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You can read my prickly attitude as frustration with my own life, not a reflection on you, who I really like. Call it professional jelousy if you like. I want your life I suppose! I'm working hard every week to find work and open doors, usually only met with apathy and unreturned phone calls and resumes, and sometimes you make it look all so easy. I get to thinking, Jeez if I had Harry's gig, I'd never miss a deadline, I'd bust my butt night and day, etc. But it is your gig, and you know what's best for it. I guess I need to take a break from TalkBack and the internet in general. Sorry to have acted like such a poo-poo butt.
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That's actually a pretty damn good explanation. A little tardy I suppose, but then again it's your life and all.
How 'bout this, if you answer the one question everybody is dying to know the answer to, are you going to do a DVD review thing?
Inquiring minds want to know, hence the inquiry. -
has got to be in his 30s. I remember thinking he was too old to play high school back when Not Another Teen Movie came out.
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I just wanted to write something to sound like an ass and see if you actualy respond to my post.
Other than that, good read, no probs from me. Keep it real big guy.
AND ROCK ON AUSTIN (born there, dad and uncle graduates of UT but moved to Washington as a kid) -
Feb 17, 2009 5:17:15 PM CST
For Some Reason I want to watch Bill & Ted's Excellent...
by soylentmean
Adventure.
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Im with you on that idea Soylent
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and he turns around and starts to blow me, and I was like "Woh, What the fuck? Are you gay or something?"
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Does anyone remember Olsen played Loyd in Dumb and Dumberer?
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That was kind of touching.
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has sunk so god damn low since "Secret Honor". Everything SCREEN GEMS puts out is shit, the only exception being "Snatch", but I guess with enough Miller High Life you can enjoy just about anything!
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Not to bust your nuts or anything but..Some people including myself really look forward to the DVD column. I think they get a little frustrated by the tardiness and percieve it as a lack of interest on your part. I don't think thats the case, your input is something some folks I'm sure base there hard earned purchase dollars on when selecting that weeks offerings. Thats the backwards ass reason Amazon gives your site a spiff when anyone links the purchase from here..Even Amazon knows that what Harry likes others will check out..I hope you can dig where thats at because that is in essence what this is all about..Sharing the movie love.
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There's no way I will lower myself to pay for this, especially considering that it's PG-13.
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Hell, I'd love to contribute to the DVD column if it means getting sent a bunch of free DVDs/Blu-Rays!!!
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Done a negative review recently? Seems everything has been positive lately.
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Get with the program Barrock.
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Or maybe I lost it? Also, it's funny. Harry's wife is younger than my girlfriend and I'm nineteen.
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Feb 17, 2009 6:42:05 PM CST
Not the most creative use of a movies title in an article
by guy who got a headache and accidentally
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but they will lay down
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THIS story needs to be told.
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this really happened right? it wasn't an episode of heroes i missed or something?
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No really, i'd really like to hear this fucking story.
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Jesus Harry, I really DON'T need to hear about your sexual exploits in your reviews. You wanna tell those stories? GET A FUCKING TWITTER ACCOUNT OR SOMETHING!!! You just sound like an egotistical prick, I don't come on these talkbacks and tell any of my sex stories. Jesus Christ. And by the way, that DVD column is part of your fucking job. If I'm a lawyer and one of my colleagues gets pissed at me for not reading through some files I was supposed too, I don't say "Oh, well excuse me for wanting to watch a movie. How dare I" YOUR JOB IS TO WATCH MOVIES. Any one of us Talkbackers would kill to have your job, but your wasting the opportunity in front of you. That's why people get sore about this shit.
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oh, that's right. you don't have one.
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Was very interesting. Check it out if you can. Its not the French movie.
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Umm Jim Carry funny??? I guess the producers of Dumb and Dumberer agreed with you on that one as well.
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Really Harry you didn't realize (IMDB) he was in that fucking SHIT IS EVERYWHERE atrousity that was Dumb and Dumberer where's my money back I paid to see that shit in theaters. But as its been pointed out he is a good Paul Walker stand in and the mother fucker is 30 something, thats pushing it in terms of playing a high school. Does he beat Andrea Zuckerman as playing the oldest High School student????
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If anyone ever saw The Loop. Which coincidentally also had Philip Baker Hall.
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...Is because most sororitys have a "Screw the fat loser" hazing task. Those Daughters of Delta Nu had you fooled, Harry...
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but I went through a run of DVDs for the column that just about broke my will. Seriously. SPACE BUDDIES and a whole host of shit that made my brain bleed, and I decided to take a few weeks off to just heal my brain with movies I haven't watched in years because I rarely get to just ENJOY movies in my collection. So I have been doing that. That said, I've begun to filter the new stuff back in, like I watched 3 IMAX Blu Rays today, MALABIMBA and a pair of Bollywood Horror titles. I'm going to post a list of the past 3 weeks of picks - with minimal comments to catch up, then be back on target.
Reason I ragged on Reluctant Austinite is this. I know him. I gave him his talkback name - and he can just EMAIL me or CALL ME if he wants. -
i hope you realize he played Lloyd in Dumb and Dumberer......you know Jim Carey's role
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Harry was a very confused lad.
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I don't quite have your appreciation for classic films. Though TMC is on a lot in my house. I do share some of your interest in action, scifi, horror, anime, and current releases. I have close to 150 of my reviews out there on the web if you'd like to see them. And, was the Pineapple Express prize awarded? I'd love to see the winner.
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And the Loop was directed by the the guy who directed F.U......
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You are the fuggin man. How many of these talkbackers (including myself) get to make a living doing something they have loved since childhood? I would guess not very many.
I would love to visit a movie set just to see the magic of film-making... you get to do that shit for an occupation.
Keep it up brother! -
must be a slow time for ad revenue!
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That sounds intriguing.
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Harry's review has got to be dirtier than the PG-13 movie in it's entirety.
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He rules.
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I love you. That review was great. This flick may be PG rated, but that review makes up for it in spades. I have actually seen one or two trailers for this, but I didn't really care until now.Bottom line is, because of you, I am going to see this freakin movie.On DVD. Just let me know when it comes out on the column, and I will be sure to rent it. Promise, promise. Just gotta let me know on the DVD column, and WHAM! there I am at line in Blockbuster.Seriously dude, you have the coolest job in the world. Glad you enjoyed the movie. I'll see if I can check it out.
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and thought it looked like a run of the mill sex comedy. didn't hit my radar, although I did notice the dude from Heroes. Now, everyone is giving it the thumbs up? Ok...i'm officially curiuous. The new American Pie???
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I said wow.
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like Eurotrip, a comedy that's worth seeing, but not really worth going out to the theaters to see
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...and Superbad ( which is the absolute worst garbage I've seen in years) ... wow, this site has really gone into the dumpster ...
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which I'm not. But Harry's reviews are almost always spot on for me, why? Because he reviews them from a movie lovers perspective. Not some corporate hack. I won't be seeing this cheerleader movie in the theater, not my style, I usually don't see comedies on the big screen, but I'll catch it on cable and remember this review.
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Looks like every other SHIT teen sex romp, far as I can tell.
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But here's some constructive criticism for Harry:
Your review makes me want to avoid this film. The film's trailers hadn't gotten me interested and now this review hasn't helped that fact. Your desire to expound on how "hot" the female cast is borders on the disturbing in the context of a non-porn movie review ("heaven for wet dreams"?). Your review confirms a lot of things I suspected based on the trailer. I hope this movie bombs.
The fact that one of the reviews tagged this film as "Bring it On meets Superbad" pretty much sealed my hatred of this film. Anytime two movies "meet", the supposed 'offspring' seem to have many defects. -
I was disappointed we didn't get a "that said" in the review, but Harry didn't let us down in his talkback comments.
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One of these words is different from the others. One of these words doesn't belong.
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Using words together that dont make sense
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Does this review remind anybody of Harry's "Center Stage" review from years ago. He loved that film too because of a latent ballerina fetish. This review harkens back, though here Harry never even considers that his overt cheerleader fetish might be coloring his perception of this film. Really Harry, as American males, aren't we all programmed with the "must love cheerleaders" code (even those with bad experiences)? It's like teen girls with their "Dylan McKay" "wounded soul" fetish.
Yes, I'm still pissed about the Center Stage thing. My wife LOVES that movie, and I sat through it once on your recommendation. Never again Knowles! Trust your GUT people. -
harry lost his virginity to his ex cheerleader wife
nothing wrong with that -
And I don't care for work, so I think I'll just go ahead and pretend like I'm typing something important.
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That said, you needn't go on about your rotten teen sexual history. All of those questions are answered when we see you on the big screen.
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Harry,
I've been a fan of your site since inception, so please take to heart what I say next: Don't take the advice of these talkbackers on what/how to run your site. The beauty of your site is the unstructured and untamedness of it. Keep that up, that what makes it beautiful. (Full disclosure: I am a 45-year old corporate exec, not some college couch potato.) -
but you gotta give Jim Carrey a break... he's not a kid anymore... he can't keep up the speed regimen required to be 90s funny at his age.
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why do you have to completely fabricate personal experiences in order to write a review???
"I like cheerleaders. In Junior High in Austin, there was this little group of them that liked to torture me, because I was the fat kid at school. Slapping my ass, pretending to come on to me. I turned the tides by grabbing their asses and thanking them for the blowjob the night before."
Seriously, Harry - that NEVER EVER HAPPENED. You know its the truth. This whole review reads like a segment of Family Guy where Peter is talking about a movie and suddenly remembers the time he was a body guard for Darth Vader... This is on THAT LEVEL OF FABRICATION, HARRY.
seriously, I didnt get past that first paragraph. I felt myself embarrassed for you for having written it, and embarrassed at myself for having read it.
Thats right - today, AICN embarrassed me...TO MY OWN SELF!!! -
I still think Annette Kellerman is Capone.
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If you dont mind. How old was she?
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the way people lose their virginity. Not me, I know exactly where I left it.
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His name was Chester, and by cheerleader, Harry meant he was the janitor.
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he's just trying to give us all a little encouragement, trying to show that yes a nerdy guy can sleep with a cheerleader and what's wrong with that? and is it true? I think it is, after all stranger things than a nerdy kid having sex with a cheerleader have happened in the history of the world
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to being referred to as "nerdy" :)
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I'd much rather get reviews from you. DVD reviews are like showing up at the prom when you're in college. Too late dude.
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Feb 19, 2009 7:40:46 AM CST
Why waste Internet space with Annette Kellerman's review?
by leafar the lost
I am not going to see this movie in the theaters, but I may see it on DVD/Blue Ray. I like see lesbian, cheerleader porn. That is not the problem. My issue is with Annette Kellerman's near unreadable review of FIRED UP! Why did we need her shitty review when we have your's, Harry? We all know the only thing bitches are good for, and it isn't writing movie reviews for AICN to a bunch of male geeks. I know that this is your site, but please stop letting "girls" write reviews, or anything, and get rid of Script Girl!
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When you try to pepper your reviews with your sexual exploits you come off sounding like you're trying to hard to look "cool".
A guy as fat as you doesn't have the motor skills, stamina or to be quite honest, dick length to have a healthy sex life.
I know. I used to be 288 pounds. I know the deal. I'm 172 now and I fuck like a god -
posing as teenagers so they can fuck cheerleaders. Also starring Larry Bowles as Garry, their fat wheelchair-bound best friend who likes to dress up his Asian mail order bride as a cheerleader so he can pretend he's fucking a cheerleader. Unfortunately, Garry is impotent. But not to worry, his two best friends will fuck his wife for him.
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But a chaste sex comedy? Is there Another definition of the word I'm unaware of?
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