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UPDATED: Full Teaser Online Now!!! 1st Glimpse of GI JOE Action!

Beaks here... has just posted the entire Super Bowl spot, and, in answer to Harry's question, it looks like the tone is "typical Stephen Sommers": big, loud and kinda corny. That bothered me in VAN HELSING, but with G.I. JOE... "typical Stephen Sommers" could be just what this material needs. The disintegrating Eiffel Tower reminds me of something we'd see in the cartoon. I think that's a good thing?

Hey folks, Harry here... Some lightning quick glimpses of some of the G.I. JOE insanity that Sommers is planning to unleash this summer. Slick looking. That 'armored' stuff, is the power armor that the Joe's put on in a chase sequence that if Sommers has done his job right, will be quite something. I'm still waiting to get a glimpse of the tone of this film, to see if Sommers is directing it with a wink or with a sack. This is all pretty heavy action orientated material - completely out of context, but looking big. What do you think? This is the link, and knowing is half the battle!

Readers Talkback
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  • Jan. 31, 2009, 2:45 a.m. CST


    by TheMarineBiologist

    Folks flipping around and jumping into trains... looks like Spider-man 2.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 2:45 a.m. CST


    by caruso_stalker217

    This is the worst moment of my life.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 2:45 a.m. CST

    The worst moment of your life...

    by TheMarineBiologist

    ...was missing it by ONE SECOND.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 2:45 a.m. CST


    by caruso_stalker217

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 2:46 a.m. CST


    by caruso_stalker217

    That was even worse.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 2:47 a.m. CST

    Want to keep playing this game?

    by TheMarineBiologist

    Because it seems that every time you try to post a number, you end up failing...

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 2:49 a.m. CST


    by caruso_stalker217

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 2:49 a.m. CST


    by paralyser-pro

    Oh caruso_stalker, I've been there my lad. I was first once, about two years ago... yeah, now I don't even try. Anyway, I'm giving this flick the benefit of the doubt. I wish they had gone with a no-name cast, and the title is poo, but it's got to better than most of the shyte that came out in 2008.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 2:51 a.m. CST


    by DerLanghaarige

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 2:54 a.m. CST

    And unfortunately the clip looks waaaaaaay to much like...

    by DerLanghaarige

    ...Stephen Sommers. I still hope that, everytime he puts out a new movie, it will be more goofy fun like Deep Rising than total shit like everything else he made.<br> Oh, and am I the only one who thinks that the title of the YouTube clip is kinda disturbing? "G.I. Joe on ET?" Just imagine that! Gross. :P

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 2:54 a.m. CST

    Are you man enough for Megaforce?

    by Continentalop

    Ace Hunter has never looked better! (Huh? What do you mean that is G.I. Joe...?)

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 2:55 a.m. CST

    ok fine but...

    by red_weed

    how is he going to fit is trademark spooky overly long open mouth into this movie based on plastic figurines?

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 2:58 a.m. CST

    where is Serpentor & Cobra-La in all this?

    by Boomers_Lips

    I want to know.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 2:59 a.m. CST

    or the..

    by nolan bautista

    ..kung-fu grip?

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:02 a.m. CST

    that actually looks really cool

    by pipergates

    far out

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:07 a.m. CST

    I think it looks like PG-13 bullshit.

    by Motoko Kusanagi

    Fuck that. I love R-Rated movies.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:09 a.m. CST


    by Lashlarue


  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:10 a.m. CST

    The rise of ZARTAN

    by Six Demon Bag

    would be a whole lot sweeter

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:11 a.m. CST

    I hate these wall to wall action movies.

    by Power_Girl

    If the script cant earn an action set piece the action is useless.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:13 a.m. CST

    I think i hate Stephen Sommers

    by grievenom

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:13 a.m. CST

    G.I. Joe.

    by Series7

    The old cartoon movie sucks now. Does not hold up. But the transformers cartoon movie, light years ahead of that Mustang commercial from 07.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:15 a.m. CST


    by Series7

    Isn't that just a clip from Wanted?

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:23 a.m. CST

    Looked kinda good to me.

    by 3D-Man

    I'll probably check it out.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:30 a.m. CST

    The Rise of Crappy, Unoriginal Titles

    by The_General

    Is there someone in Hollywood that is getting residual checks on any movie that has that completely uninspired phrase in it? Because dude, sign me up for some of that cash! At this rate every movie will feature the "rise" of someone or something. When will the subtitle phase go away???

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:31 a.m. CST


    by Series7

    AAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!! <P> I'm sorry after those clips I don't think I can ever see G.I. Joe in the same light.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:32 a.m. CST


    by sonnyfern

    I think it's gonna be a DAMN good time. Imma geek out like crazy. AND ONCE AGAIN... IT's. GOT. SNAKEEYES.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:40 a.m. CST

    This looks better:

    by Dingbatty<p>G.I. Joe: Resolute

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:41 a.m. CST


    by bacci40

    who cares...when they shrunk down the toy from 6 inches to 2, i lost interest

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:45 a.m. CST

    FUCK THAT LOOKS GOOD!!!!!!!!!!!

    by Dr_Zoidberg

    Seriously, no joke, this looks like the INSANITY of the opening to GI JOE cartoon (or Action Force as I knew it in the UK). Fuck realism for once, that looks perfect. Of course that could just be an over-reaction to 5 seconds of footage but its going in the right direction.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:46 a.m. CST

    Ray Park

    by Series7

    Man what has that man been up to all these years?......Star Wars conventions.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 4:17 a.m. CST

    My Faith Is Restored

    by estacado1

    Definitely looks better than the Chun Li Street Fighter & Dragonball movies.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 4:18 a.m. CST


    by Mullah Omar

    This looks like a hundred other movies. I could have read every single comic, watched every single cartoon, and bought every single toy - and would still see that and have no idea that clip had any relation to GI JOE.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 4:25 a.m. CST

    hmmm*stroke's chin*

    by DanboJohnJ

    loving Snake eyes,and i must say it looks better than i thought it would.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 4:25 a.m. CST

    Yep, Baroness looks like shit.

    by Herb West

    Sienna looks much better naked. <p>

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 4:30 a.m. CST

    Sienna Miller: Rise of My Cobra

    by DOGSOUP

    That is all.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 4:37 a.m. CST

    Crashing through the sky, comes the fearful cry...

    by Ace of Knaves


  • Jan. 31, 2009, 4:38 a.m. CST

    Can the world oppose, the deadliest of foes.......

    by Ace of Knaves

    Cobraaaaa! Cobraaaaaa!

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 4:40 a.m. CST

    But Seriously...

    by Herb West

    I can't believe they would pull some shit like this. Apparently they are too fucking stupid to realize that GI Joe are soldiers and not superheroes. This is going to go down in history as one of the biggest jokes of all time.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 4:46 a.m. CST

    Man that was short!

    by tj donkey show

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 4:47 a.m. CST

    Man that was short!

    by tj donkey show

    I've had sex that lasted longer.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 5:06 a.m. CST

    The good part is....

    by Herb West

    This fiasco should put an end to Sommers' career permanently. We can at least hope.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 5:08 a.m. CST

    Kung Fu Grip

    by JoeSixPack

    and fuzzy hair. Both have to be in this film.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 5:46 a.m. CST

    Tomax and Xamot or GTFO

    by captainCAPSLOCK

    "They feel each other's pain!" Crimson Twins FTW!

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 5:56 a.m. CST

    Holy Crap!

    by Pompoulus

    Well you have to say they are going at it with their whole ass, and not half.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 6:11 a.m. CST

    That looks like it might be pretty cool :)

    by Col. Tigh-Fighter

    And GI Joe now moves onto the "slightly interested" list which it wasnt before - although was interested to see Joseph Gordon Levitt in tight black stuff playing a baddy lol ;)

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 6:49 a.m. CST

    by tylerzero

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 6:50 a.m. CST

    Looks crap special effects of Spiderman/Transformers

    by chrismata

    I'm still going to see it at the box office. Darn my childhood.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 6:50 a.m. CST

    "When all else fails, we don't?!"

    by tylerzero

    Obviously they DO since the movie's about Cobra coming onto the scene.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 6:57 a.m. CST

    Sommers and selling a name.

    by Sithtastic

    I have to confess, there is a part of me--the part that used to enjoy the GI Joe franchise--that wants to see this. However, from the look of things, making GI Joe "cool" again, requires making it, well...generic. As for those of you hoping this will end Sommers' career, don't hold your breath. This is about selling a name and throngs of fanboys will load the theaters for this one.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 7:02 a.m. CST

    Cut it out...

    by Zardozap2005

    WTF is with the haters on some movies? Yeah, your just so uber-elite when it comes to sitting on your asses and having an opinion about a 5 second clip. tylerzero, "Obviously they Do.." ?? Well then there wouldn't be a movie would there? Bunch of brain-dead 18-year old's wanking at their keyboards, I swear. Yes, I'm ranting. But I think my point is valid.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 7:02 a.m. CST

    Quote of the day: "A wink or with a sack"

    by chrismata

    I hope a sack with a pair in 'em.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 7:11 a.m. CST

    Looks slightly interesting....

    by BacardiRocky

    ....I am not going to bash this film until i see it or at least see a full length trailer. I mean, seeing the Dragon Ball and Street Fighter trailers gave me a good impression that those flicks might look like crap (Never a DB or DBZ fan anyways, oh well) but this clip was too short to fully make any real opinion. Hopefully we see something more in that :30 teaser on Super Bowl Sunday. And for those who are calling it a generic looking action film, well NO SHIT! Its not supposed to be Shakespeare.Its a movie about a military special forces group who takes on a terrorist organization. It does not get more generic than that but who cares. Its GI JOE.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 7:14 a.m. CST

    I wont say anything about the movie

    by ominus

    until i have seen more. <p>i am a gijoe fan,i would like to see a movie version of it,i like the cast but i dont like the director. <p>i keep a hope that in the end,it will come out as something good,but until then,i ll just wait. <P> YOOOO JOE

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 7:19 a.m. CST

    To be fair, that trailer looked pretty interesting.

    by ganymede3010

    I still think this movie is going to blow. Might be good enough for a Redbox 1 dollar rental.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 7:19 a.m. CST


    by thecrimsoncurse

    will this movie be good? of course not.<br><br>does it look 28 times better than i thought it would? yes. fuck brendan fraser.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 7:32 a.m. CST

    Looks like the final battle in Transformers

    by kikuchiyoboy

    Too bad people here hated that film... I actually enjoyed it. And the world keeps on spinning.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 7:39 a.m. CST

    But I'd like to add how do you have PG Ninja?

    by kikuchiyoboy

    I've hated every Sommers film though. I hope he embraced his cheese style and went all out on this. It's friggen G.I. Joe and not Dark Knight. <br> <br> But how does one have PG-13 Ninja?

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 7:48 a.m. CST

    this is not

    by Black And Gold

    your father's GI Joe

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 7:51 a.m. CST

    How could you tell ANYTHING from that clip?

    by Orbots Commander

    It was literally three shots: guys crashing into bus, red haired lady kicking, guys riding motorbikes and flipping in mid-air off their bikes. My guess is, they went for full out camp/cheese on this one. It is a PG movie.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 7:53 a.m. CST

    This movie should be PG

    by hayt43

    I mean it's not like anyone will get you know shot.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 7:54 a.m. CST

    Looks like fucking transformers w/o robots

    by Crow3711

    Fucking garbage. This is gonna suck massive cock. Those "power suits" or whatever just allow Sommers to shoot slow-mo missile sequences in a street and it looks exactly like the shit in transformers. Fuck this movie.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 7:55 a.m. CST

    I wouldn't mind seeing..

    by Crow3711

    a shot of Joseph Gordon-Levitt as Cobra. If there is any reason to see this at all its him.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 8:02 a.m. CST

    R Stephen Sommers and Len Wiseman the same guy?

    by cowboyone

    No Story + Boring Cast + Cool Stunts & FX = Hit Movie

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 8:14 a.m. CST

    Looks better than TRANSFORMERS

    by Aeghast

    ..and no BAY, so it can't be THAT bad

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 8:14 a.m. CST


    by evilnerd

    GI Goe my Ass

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 8:19 a.m. CST


    by TiNSeLToWN TeRRoR

    This is what Bay said on his blog:"The Super Bowl spot is coming Sunday in the third Quarter (few minutes into the quarter slot). The spot will be online a few minutes after that." "The full length teaser trailer will only be on 'Friday the 13th'. It will not hit the internet until a week later." Don't expect much either - "The teaser really only teases stuff - I'm holding so much stuff back from the final trailers because I personally hate going to movies where you have seen it all." AMEN to that!

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 8:35 a.m. CST

    And still not one American flag to be seen...

    by James Westfall

    No American flags on the posters, no 'Real American Hero' reference (which is even Hasbro's name for the toy line) and not one American flag in the trailer glimpse. It's feeling like "UN International Not American Specialist Team GO!" without calling it that.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 8:35 a.m. CST

    Won't play right, it's like a slide show

    by Drath

    What images I do see don't look very interesting. Knowing that all the Joes were black doesn't get me more excited either.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 8:48 a.m. CST


    by ironic_name

    can we get some lottery numbers, since you're psychic.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 8:49 a.m. CST

    James Westfall, isn't it great?

    by ironic_name

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 8:50 a.m. CST


    by ironic_name

    yes they are. and they hired the same girl, kate beckinsale and rachel weitz.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 8:51 a.m. CST

    I need to see the damned trailer...

    by Anna Valerious

    I need my fangirl pr0n.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 8:52 a.m. CST

    paul blart2!

    by ironic_name

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 8:58 a.m. CST

    Guesses to Anna Valerious's fangirl pr0n..

    by DOGSOUP

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 9 a.m. CST

    DEEP RISING is fucking GREAT!!!

    by godoffireinhell

    Too bad Stephen Sommers hasn't directed a watchable film since THE MUMMY.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 9:08 a.m. CST

    this might actually turn out to be pretty good

    by Jugdish

    those 10 seconds look awesome...then again FF4 part 2 looked great too

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 9:29 a.m. CST

    paul blart2: blart harder is my pr0n

    by ironic_name

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 9:30 a.m. CST

    Above all else I'll hate this movie

    by Jor-El23

    Because of the stupid jokes and other lame attempts at humor. Knowing Sommers and the crap I had to sit through in the first two Mummy movies it's pretty much a given that I'm going to get Brendan Fraser's brand of cocksure humor in the GI Joe movie. WHY?! Just make a GD action movie!

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 9:35 a.m. CST

    Robotic power armour chase?

    by lex romero

    Ok now I'm curious.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 9:42 a.m. CST

    I like to see Sienna Miller with..

    by palpatinefuckedmydog


  • Jan. 31, 2009, 9:44 a.m. CST

    is Sgt. Slaughter gonna beat up Serpentor

    by Groothewarrior

    thissss isss theeee Vippppppppperrrr!!!!

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 9:46 a.m. CST

    I love to see them running

    by Jodet

    I love the moment of their death when I am one with Zardoz.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 9:49 a.m. CST


    by YeahSureWhatever

    Is he going to have a metal head in this?

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 9:50 a.m. CST

    YAY ANOTHER CGI CRAPFEST from Mr. Mummy Van Helsing

    by SomaShine


  • Jan. 31, 2009, 9:59 a.m. CST

    Weren't stupid puns and jokes on the show?

    by terry1978

    Honestly, if you want to dark knight this movie up, whatever, but if there is no comedy at all, it wouldn't be G.I. Joe.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 9:59 a.m. CST

    Once again, you geeks crack me up.

    by Darth_Kaos

    Some of you guys dog this movie, to lower your expectations, so if it's good, it won't sting your egos as much. We all know, Summers is hit or miss (the first and 2nd Mummy movies were actually good). I actually like his style, and he does know how to stage fight and action scenes (unlike Nolan). I look forward to seeing more with upcoming trailers, but if I had to make a decision based on everything I've read and seen so far. I would have to say that am actually excited to see this popcorn flick.<br><br> I'm even going farther in saying it's my 2nd most anticipated movie of 2009, behind Watchmen. GO JOE!

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 10:13 a.m. CST

    Anyone who complains that it's cartoonish

    by Larry Sellers

    Go to hell. Seriously. Over the top? "Generic action"? Do you remember the cartoon being that good? Do you remember the comic panels moving at 24 fps? And, more importantly, that was literally about 10 seconds of footage. Think about that last sentence.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 10:16 a.m. CST

    ironic_name - Well no, it's not at all great

    by James Westfall

    If the studio and the director are terrified of having anything to do with America be in a movie about 'G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero,' then honestly the movie shouldn't be made. This movie should be done by people who don't think America's bad or evil or whatever. To be true to its concept it should be made by people who *gasp* actually love America.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 10:26 a.m. CST

    people who *gasp* actually love America don't exist in this dojo

    by ironic_name

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 10:30 a.m. CST

    How can you possibly think that this is not awesome

    by dr sauch

    A lot of people take themselves too seriously here. Fucking GI Joe? Transformers? These are television shows created to sell toys. They're fucking glorified commercials! You can't fuck up the source material when the source material is a commercial, you fat fucks!

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 10:31 a.m. CST

    this movie was made before obama was president

    by dioxholster

    sucks for them, coz everyone even international people LOVE america right now, they cant get enough of obama and cant get enough of america. lame studio that deemphasized the who patriotic america stuff in this movie becuase it wouldve worked. this movie is like a slap in the face to the people who like their country.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 10:37 a.m. CST

    What the fuck

    by palpatinefuckedmydog

    is all this bullshit whining? We've only seen 10 seconds of it. I'd personally wait until I've seen seconds before I bitch.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 10:40 a.m. CST

    There needs to be a scene....

    by Loosejerk

    where they are walking down a hallway in GIJoe HQ and on the wall are portraits of Sgt. Slaughter and Fridge Perry....but not in "black gear"...but their "old school" costumes.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 10:41 a.m. CST

    Well it is set in or around America

    by Larry Sellers

    starring Americans, made by Americans, and it will top the American box office and very likely most international box office upon release. It is about American heroes. We don't need it to say it is. That's the cheesiest fucking subtitle ever. "A Real American Hero." Escapism wins for whoever thinks laser-firing, high-tech armor wearing muscley cartoons are "Real American Heroes." The cartoon was probably animated in India. Right next door to China, where the toys were manufactured.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 10:44 a.m. CST

    No Sgt. Slaughter--No Deal!

    by filegumbo

    Who needs fancy flips and acrobatics. No namby pamby stuff, just one mean drill instructor kicking the living crap out of bad guys.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 10:44 a.m. CST

    Can't be bad as Transformers

    by Bass Ackwards

    Sommers can be very very bad, but he's at the least never as stupid as Bay. Transotmers wasn't ruined by being mediocre, it was ruined by being plain old idiotic. Plus Joe is just an easier property, it doesn't have the mythology or the fun character dynamics that the Transformer cartoon had, which the movie eagerly washed over to make a movie about Shia. If the action is strong, and the Joes kick bunches of Cobra foot soldier ass throughout without wasting time in goofy needless side stories, this will be mostly a success. I couldn't see a thing in that trailer, but the main thing that worries me about Sommers is his reliance on CGI, it's like the bigger budget he gets the less he tries to use it for actual filming, make a cartoon already!

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 11:02 a.m. CST


    by damned-dirty-ape

    Gets no chemistry from the actors, uses way too much CGI in everything. What else is there to say? Bag o shite

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 11:12 a.m. CST

    GI Joe Movie Action Figure File Cards

    by James Westfall

    Some small spoiler stuff in them - still looks like a train wreck. http: //

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 11:13 a.m. CST

    I don't blame them

    by jermcdee

    This movie was expensive as shit. Those guys need to do what they can to make this as accessible to a foreign market. That doesn't mean I'm gonna like this thing, but truth be told that looked kind of cool. i'm not missing the "Real American Hero" or the original costumes.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 11:14 a.m. CST

    After seeing this slick nonsense, I'm ready for PUSH

    by WerePlatypus

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 11:23 a.m. CST

    It could be worse. This could be directed by James Cameron.



  • Jan. 31, 2009, 11:24 a.m. CST

    It Looks Like A Super Hero Film...

    by Media Messiah

    ...not a as I would have assumed...I was expecting something more along the lines of say...True Lies instead of The X-Men.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 11:27 a.m. CST

    Snake Eyes looks cool jumping around

    by Hikaru Ichijo

    you know you're going to see this, so why go in with expectations?

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 11:36 a.m. CST


    by BringingSexyBack

    America! Love it or don't make a movie about it!!!

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 11:36 a.m. CST


    by damned-dirty-ape

    Never finished watching one of his films where i didn't want to punch him in the head for taking at least 90 minutes of my life away.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 11:45 a.m. CST

    Marlon Wayans...

    by hallowhitch31 in this. There is no way this can be good. I hate how all of the characters look like the vampire ninjas from 'Blade 2'.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 12:13 p.m. CST

    hugh jackman for zartan, fuck yeah do it!!!

    by Warcraft


  • Jan. 31, 2009, 12:14 p.m. CST

    also, the movie should have the opening song from the animated m

    by Warcraft

    cobra, cobraaaa, cobra, cobraaaa

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 1:14 p.m. CST

    You can Bush for GIJOE not being based in America!

    by ganymede3010

    Come on think about it. Almost every movie based on the American Military in the last 8 years has bombed in the box office. There's no fucking way the suits are going to throw 200 million on a movie about a "special unit of the US military".

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 1:15 p.m. CST

    ****You can BLAME Bush***** /fixed

    by ganymede3010

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 1:15 p.m. CST

    ****You can BLAME Bush***** /fixed

    by ganymede3010

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 1:18 p.m. CST

    Transformers was labeled as a "love letter" to...

    by TheMarineBiologist

    ... the military.<p> Tell me, ganymede, which of these military movies bombed?

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 1:24 p.m. CST

    It's fucking G.I. Joe

    by Phil Connors

    It's for kids, not loser menchildren.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 1:24 p.m. CST

    Transformers is the only exception. .

    by ganymede3010

    Plus, the decepticons stomped the shit out of the US Military. One Decepticon casualty to their hundred.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 1:25 p.m. CST


    by TheMarineBiologist

    Name one.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 1:27 p.m. CST

    No shit asshole I left out the 2 peroids in GIJOE

    by ganymede3010

    So my fucking title would fit you dickless grammar nazi.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 1:35 p.m. CST

    The question is..

    by palpatinefuckedmydog

    Will they do a G.I.JOE/TRANSFORMERS movie next? they did in the funny books.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 1:37 p.m. CST

    List of US Military movies that failed in the box office.

    by ganymede3010

    Redacted, Stop Loss, Lion for Lambs, Body of Lies, Jarhead, Valley of Ellah, The Situation, The Kingdom. Not one of these military movies broke-even.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 1:42 p.m. CST

    A wonderfull 3 frames of animation courtesy of youtube.

    by Damien Chowder

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 2:01 p.m. CST

    No wonder...

    by TheMarineBiologist

    Redacted: a movie based upon a handful of military officers who raped and murdered a family. A very good reason why we shouldn't be in Iraq, as propagated by the filmmaker. An anti-war film.<p> Stop Loss: An anti-war film describing the horrors of the stop loss program and how it keeps people in the war.<p> Lions for Lambs: An anti-war film showing how incompetent leaders send poor men and women off to their deaths.<p> Body of Lies: A film that shows a special agent being manipulated and thrown into danger by a laid back leader sipping lemonade back home. Anti-war film.<p> Jughead: Showing the ill effects that come from war.<p> In the Valley of Elah: A film showcasing many ultra-liberal actors discussing torture of prisoners and death of one's children. Hell ya, anti-war film.<p> The Situation: Limited release, the plot sounds absolutely dreadful. Never heard of it...<p> The Kingdom: I remember when this came out... I remember the reviews... this movie SUCKED.<p> So, most (if not all) of those movies were anti-war movies that made sure to show the military in a very terrible light. These were movies that were made because Bush sucked, not movies that were unsuccessful because Bush sucked. These movies sucked all on their own because it was wholly miscalculated that Americans wanted to see the American Military in shambles.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 2:07 p.m. CST has the full superbowl spot

    by Bouncy X

    i know most here are gonna hate it because well....its aicn but i think it looks pretty cool.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 2:12 p.m. CST

    I'm looking forward to Leonard Nimoy's cameo in this

    by YackBacker

    Wait, what movie are we talking about?

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 2:13 p.m. CST

    sorry but that looked Cool!

    by StrokerX

    Snake Eyes looks bad ass...and wtf was that flippin thru the streets...looked fun as hell.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 2:13 p.m. CST

    So films about how America's military sucks bomb...

    by Darth_Inedible

    Ganymede is off his B.D.S. meds.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 2:16 p.m. CST

    Ganymede3010, your really think GIJOE...

    by blindambition238

    falls into the same category as those films, which were straight up dramas about current events. <p> This movie is going to have about as much political and social relevance as Transformers.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 2:34 p.m. CST

    Aren't all war films

    by Bass Ackwards

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 2:38 p.m. CST

    Will There Be 1000s Of Troops Shooting Lasers At Each Other?

    by LaserPants

    And missing? Where every plane explosion shows someone escaping in a parachute? Thats what the show was about -- an open-ended war on terror where M16s are laser guns and nobody ever gets hurt or killed. Ever. In a word: L-A-M-E.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 2:39 p.m. CST

    fucking iPhone!

    by Bass Ackwards

    But aren't all war films anti-war films? It'd be a pretty hard headed POV proclaiming the joys and fun of war.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 2:41 p.m. CST

    by DDillustration

    Looks better than any lame ass Transformers movie. Talk about overrated. At least GI looks fun. Probably a horrible movie, but fun nonetheless.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 2:42 p.m. CST

    How To Make It Politically Relevant

    by LaserPants

    Turns out that GI JOE and COBRA are both funded by the same organization (oil barons, natch) -- two proxies set up in order to keep the gears of the military industrial complex rolling on.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 2:42 p.m. CST

    Will anyone be killed?

    by jrb

    Or will all the bullet fired by GI Joe's only knock the guns out of the hands of Cobra fighters and never actually draw blood? Will everybody safely parachute out of aircraft that are blown up, or will they die at the controls? I watched a lot of GI Joe and was just growing out of my "action figure" stage when the toys came out. (I had the GI Joe tank and wish to hell I never sold it at a garage sale. It was cool as shit!) It was the lack of death and real consequences to combat violence that made me lose interest in the cartoon. Then I discovered Robotech. That show had people getting killed all the time. Even seriously cool main characters got knocked off. R.I.P. Roy Fokker... You'll be hunting for pineapple salads in heaven.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 2:46 p.m. CST

    Theres No Such Thing As An Anti-War Film

    by LaserPants

    Because even those critical of war show ultimately have to stage exciting action scenes; thereby saying, unintentionally, that war is "bad-ass" and "cool." Maybe a movie which only focused on the aftermath of battle -- the charred, battered remains of the dead, wailing with fear, anger, terror and pain -- could be anti-war. Sort of like how Haneke kept most of the violence in FUNNY GAMES off screen; focusing one excrutiatingly long scene on the aftermath of a brutal killing.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 2:46 p.m. CST

    fuck you fat losers- that looked cool


    the people on this site piss me off

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 2:48 p.m. CST

    looks like it wishes it was transformers...

    by Westonian

    which is a sad wish.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 2:48 p.m. CST

    Thank God For Anime

    by LaserPants

    jrb mentioned Robotech (and/or Macross, et al), and he's totally right. Star Blazers (Space Cruiser Yamato) was the same way -- war stories in which there are actual consequences and characters you love dying. GI JOE is the ultimate jingoist fantasy -- an endless war where we always win, the bad guys always lose, and there are no consequences whatsoever.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 2:55 p.m. CST

    The full spot's on YouTube now folks...

    by Shermdawg <br><br> Now there's no reason for me to watch the game.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 2:56 p.m. CST


    by BacardiRocky

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 2:59 p.m. CST


    by BacardiRocky

    damn you!!

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:06 p.m. CST


    by BringingSexyBack

    Which Marine reigns supreme?!?!

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:07 p.m. CST


    by Shermdawg

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:09 p.m. CST

    Just watched the Superbowl Trailer!

    by ganymede3010

    OMFG, please don't tell me that I'm going to be forced to eat crowe:( This trailer "looks" good, however, so did the Phantom Menace. If the reviews are decent. I'll might actually pay to see this movie.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:10 p.m. CST


    by Six Demon Bag

    yep, that just happened

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:16 p.m. CST

    more anti-terror brainwashing

    by geek molester

    fuck this movie in it's ass with a rusty Rambo knife. Why are all their costumes black? Black is chosen by the government to make their stormtroopers more intimidating... TO THE PUBLIC. Whome all the "anti-terrorism" legistlation is aimed at. Not the fake, made up terrorists, fuck, Osama Bin Laden shoulda been in this movie, hes a fuckin made up character.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:17 p.m. CST

    Watched it as it was yanked. LOL

    by JusticeSabre

    It kinda just breaks down into bits and fragments and just disappears.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:17 p.m. CST

    Rambo wasn't a Marine

    by jrb

    He was a Green Beret, Army Special Forces. I seem to recall one or two GI Joe characters that may have been Marines. Wasn't there a drill sergeant who was based on a pro wrestler? That was right after I stopped watching the show.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:19 p.m. CST

    I want to use Sienna Miller for a toilet

    by YackBacker

    My oh my is she filthy.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:21 p.m. CST


    by cyrent

    no, it doesn't really seem totally gi-joe-ish, but I'm young enough to not have any heavily entrenched memories of the show so I don't much care.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:21 p.m. CST

    So, are Cobra Commander and Dr.Mindbender really...

    by Shermdawg character now?

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:22 p.m. CST

    Body of Lies

    by geek molester

    was PRO WAR

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:23 p.m. CST

    The suits are black because...

    by ganymede3010

    Apparently these aren't normal military issued suits. These suits are allegedly uber exo skeletons that enhances their normal abilities. From that perspective it's like saying why are all F-22 Raptors grey.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:25 p.m. CST

    geek molester

    by jrb

    The costumes are black because they look cool in black. They'd look pretty fucking stupid in pink or powder puff blue (like the panties you're wearing). And spare us your 9/11 conspiracy theories. This is a site for fanboys and geeks, not retarded wannabe leftist radicals who have to live in a made up world where America is always the bad guy. I bet that gets you lot of points on the radical chic meter. Tool.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:25 p.m. CST

    that actually looks pretty good....

    by br1947

    then again so did Transformers early on.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:28 p.m. CST

    No Mask on Destro = Flames on Optimus Prime

    by Lucasblows

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:29 p.m. CST

    jrb, this site is saturated with "radical leftists"

    by ganymede3010

    Where in the hell have you been for the last 10 years. And a great deal of us support a transparent independent investigation of 911. And since when was the pursuit of truth considered radical?

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:29 p.m. CST

    jrb, this site is saturated with "radical leftists"

    by ganymede3010

    Where in the hell have you been for the last 10 years. And a great deal of us support a transparent independent investigation of 911. And since when was the pursuit of truth considered radical?

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:29 p.m. CST


    by kwisatzhaderach

    Check out Paths of Glory.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:30 p.m. CST


    by drturing


  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:32 p.m. CST

    If you can't like that, you should seek antidepressants.

    by dr sauch

    Is it a stunning piece of cinema? Is it the next TDK? Will it be the first cartoon adaptation to be awarded a major Oscar? No. Will it be fucking sweet ass action, stupid one-liners, and babes? Yes. You fat fucks neglect to realize that GI Joe was not written by James Joyce. Its a stupid cartoon for fucking kids. Now it will be a stupid movie for teenagers and twentysomethings, and it will be just as much fun now as it was then. Jesus christ, relax once in awhile and stop demanding every movie be TDK.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:32 p.m. CST

    Destro gets his mask at the end of the movie.

    by ganymede3010

    To make a long story short Destro's face is badly disfirgured towards the end of the film. That's when he gets his mask.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:33 p.m. CST

    Absolute garbage

    by kwisatzhaderach

    A slo-mo shot of someone going through a glass window was novel in The Matrix 10 long years ago, but not now. Oh and another outrageous take the money and run performance from Christopher Eccleston.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:34 p.m. CST

    That was exactly what I expected.

    by rbatty024

    While that says some pretty bad things about the "artistic" value of the film (or, merely its competence level), giving people what they expect usually works out in the box office game.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:38 p.m. CST

    Marlon Wayans was in Requiem for a Dream

    by Dreadlock Holmes

    Which in case you never saw it, a good film.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:41 p.m. CST

    everyone saying they'll boycott this is a retard

    by ironic_name

    you didn't boycott TDK, or TF animated, or Transormers. you will see this.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:44 p.m. CST


    by geek molester

    hahaha that's funny dude. fuck. you're funny as shit. you dumbed down idiots living in a fantasy world accusing those who pay attention to reality as opposed to jerking it to comic book collections with CNN on in the background. You fuckin crack me up. You're like a child who still believes in Santa Claus. It's pathetic.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:44 p.m. CST

    Marlon, Wayans & Don Cheadle

    by ganymede3010

    Arguably 2 of the most inconic Black action roles are being filled by the 2 boney unathelectic looking actors. Damn hollywood is in need of some Black Action stars.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:47 p.m. CST


    by The Edges Hat

    ...sounded Scottish. About time too...we shaped the world, we'll have our ninjas set about you all :) Heh actually looked not too bad although the eiffel tower bit was like Team America...FUCK YEAH!

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:47 p.m. CST

    And the costumes are BLACK

    by geek molester

    because anti-terror stormtroopers wear BLACK. Nice try idiots but the costumes in the cartoon certainly weren't all fucking black. Black is the color of the Empires stormtroopers. Lucas got it wrong, they ain't white. They are ALL BLACK to condition you fuckin mouth breathing knuckle-draggers to love the police state. Not that it's gonna work, but at least a handful of you geniuses on this board are gonna be licking their boots to save you from Osama, who JRB says you guys should be afraid of, LMAO OSAMA DID IT! haha. good one dude. What a moron.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:48 p.m. CST

    looks like trash to me

    by Darth Thoth

    absolute trash... as (unfortunately) expected. i'm not holding my breath at all on this one.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:51 p.m. CST

    Also Joseph Gorden Levitt

    by Jor-El23

    Have nothing against him as an actor but as Cobra Commander? That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard. It's way more ridiculous than those rumors about Jay Baruchel as the villain in the Justice League movie

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:51 p.m. CST

    And I'm not "left-wing" either fuck-tard

    by geek molester

    only the dumbest of the dumbed down shit for brains still buys the left-right bullshit paradigm, unfortunately that's the majority of Americans considering the Lord Obama's popularity, I mean fuck, you're probably so fuckin ignorant you didn't notice he ran on an anti-war platform and is now moving 30,000 troops to Afghanistan, but shit, since its Obama now the war is O.K. right? Fuckin retard.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:51 p.m. CST

    People who are anticipating this film....

    by Zandunga

    ...have terrible short-term memory and are just awaiting massive disappointment. Remember the shít sandwich known as Van Helsing? No? Remember the craptacular Mummy 2? This has all the hallmarks of a generic, action cheese fest full of special effects and corny one-liners. Stephen Summers is interchangeable with Len Wiseman, Rob Cohen, Michael Bay and so on. When are people going to stop jizzing their pants at the first sight of a big spectacle that will inevitably turn out to be a schlocky, throwaway film? If anything else, 2008 has taught us - with films like Iron Man and Dark Knight - that action/adventure can be handled with vibrancy, dynamism, and some sense of life and weight underneath the eye-popping spectacle. Even a movie like Taken, which is formulaic straight ahead action, transcends this kind of Stephen Sommers garbage and has some solid filmmaking chops and an intense vibe to it. Taken is schlock, but it's solid, well-directed, well-acted schlock that Stephen Summers is incapable of doing. Until you geeks stop supporting crap like GI Joe, the studios will continue to churn out pig slop and we will continue to get stuff like Fantastic Four 2, Die Hard 4, Transformers, and Van Helsing. I, for one, will not be watching it in theaters. Maybe I'll sneak a peak at Sienna Miller's scenes online because as far as I'm concerned, her cleavage is the only thing this "film" has going for itself. This is about money, and when the studios realize these so-called directors aren't bankable anymore, they'll have to shift gears and start investing in the kind of talent that can actually deliver.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:54 p.m. CST


    by mrbeaks

    And yet a slo-mo shot of the James Gang crashing through two windows on horseback is *still* awesome twenty-nine years later.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:54 p.m. CST

    I'm seeing it opening weekend

    by chrismata

    Then I'm going to make sweet love to my ticket stub.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:54 p.m. CST


    by Luscious.868

    You heard it here first folks. This thing has box office disaster written all over it.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:54 p.m. CST


    by Luscious.868

    You heard it here first folks. This thing has box office disaster written all over it.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:57 p.m. CST

    geek molester, what's up you ass?

    by jrb

    Oh yeah, your boyfriend. Jesus, you need to calm down. Take your meds. BTW, Obama didn't run on an anti-war platform. He was always for increasing our troop strength in Afghanistan and was always for pulling out of Iraq. I worked on his campaign, so I ought to know.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:58 p.m. CST

    Not as bad as I thought it would look.

    by Orionsangels

    It looks expensive and in my mind. I was picturing, Street Fighter the movie like quality, but you can tell it's ILM or something doing the effects.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 3:59 p.m. CST

    Zandunga you compare FF2 to Transformers GTFO!

    by ganymede3010

    Please, more people liked Transformers then the extreme nerd raging minority that hated it. Any movie that eclipses 700+ million = word of mouth. No one here is supporting G.I JOE what we're saying is it "looks" allot better then we thought it would.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 4 p.m. CST

    What I really like is that they attacking Paris.

    by DerLanghaarige

    I mean, finally is something else exploding than an American landmark. We didn't have this since Armageddon, which was 10 years ago! Even after 9/11 Hollywood still prefers to destroy American cities in movies. I'm just saying that this is getting boring.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 4 p.m. CST

    tell that to the dupes with the Obama

    by geek molester

    bumper sticker with a peace sign on it. You. Are. A. Fucking. Moron.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 4:03 p.m. CST

    what's up my ass?

    by geek molester

    I can't stand brainless idiots who are stupid enough to vote for a lying politician like Bush or Obama who ruined this country. I'm stuck here with hundreds of millions of mouth-breathing JRBs, and your breath fuckin stinks from your shit brains.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 4:03 p.m. CST


    by brandon11

    looks like transformers + spider the worst way possible. just awful. I hope this isnt how they think captain america is supposed to look.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 4:08 p.m. CST

    and wo would you vote for, geek molester?

    by jrb

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 4:13 p.m. CST

    Sweet Georgia Brown!!!!!

    by IndyCollector

    That is AWESOME. Eat it hater fags.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 4:19 p.m. CST

    Well, I'm done here

    by jrb

    My apologies to most of you. I usually wouldn't want to turn a thread about GI Joe into a political shit throwing contest. I'll never be able to change the mind of the crazy bag lay on the street who thinks I'm conspiring with the Queen of England and the KGB to steal her fillings. I'll never be able to change the mind of the religious nut who believes Adam & Eve rode dinosaurs like the Flintstones. And I'll never be able to change the mind of someone who thinks thousands of Americans from all walks of life willingly participated in an act of treason and mass murder of their fellow Americans, that the hundreds needed to plan such an event did so and never talked, that the hundreds needed to recruit the thousands of participants never met anyone who said "no" and that no one has ever talked and that it all went down flawlessly to the last second and the NYFD was in on it and the airlines (who lost billions afterward) and the scores of structural engineers and architects and the eyewitnesses who watched a plane (not a missile) crash into the Pentagon, etc., etc. "Extraordinary claims demand extraordinary PROOF" - Carl Sagan. One last thing: Obama has been in office for just over a week. How is it that he's ruined the country? Bush, definitely.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 4:21 p.m. CST

    Actually this has $300 million US gross written all over it...

    by Ravetin

    ...doesn't make it look like any less of a Transformers clone though.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 4:24 p.m. CST

    Yo, Joe!

    by thebearovingian

    Still ambivalent. Dennis Quaid is a plus but I'm still ambivalent. I hate the fact that they have the carpentry-lovin', pun-speakin' Brit baddie from Gone in 60 Seconds as Destro. "When it rains, it pours." *rolls eyes* I love it when Nic Cage is smashing that guy's handmade furniture. "No, no, not the furniture! My babies!"

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 4:26 p.m. CST

    You're right JRB, 19 arabs defeated the US Military 911!

    by ganymede3010


  • Jan. 31, 2009, 4:29 p.m. CST

    After that trailer, I need a...

    by Roketopunch


  • Jan. 31, 2009, 4:34 p.m. CST

    who wants a

    by ironic_name


  • Jan. 31, 2009, 4:43 p.m. CST

    -sigh- Beaks...

    by Anna Valerious

    You don't spend much time reading, do you?

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 4:46 p.m. CST

    Almost incomprehensible

    by Emperor_was_a_jerk

    PLEASE, just take a night class on creative writing or journalism. That small paragraph was a tough read.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 4:51 p.m. CST

    Oh my fucking gawd

    by beatleMatt

    This looks so horrible. Like, they're almost trying to make it terrible. This piece of shit is going to stink to high heaven.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 4:53 p.m. CST

    I love all the "leftist" bashing from geeks......

    by Ace of Knaves

    Dwight Schrute lives apparently, and he is a multitude.Remember, comics, movies, tv shows, these things are art, made by artists. Artist types usually tend to lean left, even if they do vent their more right wing tendencies through the power fantasies of the entertainment they produce. I am saying this from first hand knowledge.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 4:54 p.m. CST


    by Obscura

    that actually looked like a lot of fun.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 5:01 p.m. CST

    So is that "Hollywood Undead" song

    by blindambition238

    going to be the new "Let the Bodies Hit The Floor!"?

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 5:09 p.m. CST


    by googamooga

    Shall from this point on replace "FLAMES ON OPTIMUS!!"

  • The one that crashes through the bus window. I can just picture that scene going in slow motion while he makes some "Holy shit, nigga!" line as he flies through. Then they dodge some RPG fire with tactics Ironhide taught them. Hrm...

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 5:38 p.m. CST

    Man that looked shite

    by kendragon

    Its fricken matrix meets powerrangers.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 5:47 p.m. CST

    One ticket please!

    by Buckeye

    Looks like a kick-ass popcorn flick with heaping helpings of corn and cheese. Some times you just wanna check your brain at the door and go along for the ride and come opening day I'll be there with my brain pan spic and span.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 5:57 p.m. CST


    by rem2525

    I hope we get to see/hear the "re-imagined" version of Cold Slither

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 6:09 p.m. CST

    When when did GI Joe become....

    by allykatD

    GI Covert Operative Forces? Maybe since I'm a girl and I never played with GI Joe's that something like this is... well, what GI Joe is about? It looks slick,but then again, good production values can make a turd *look* good but it can't save it ***cough*** Transformers ***cough***

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 6:16 p.m. CST

    Van Helsing 2

    by Power_Girl

    I don't watch this directors movies no matter what!

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 6:17 p.m. CST


    by BringingSexyBack

    Typical slick production from Summers. More than likely to DL it.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 6:17 p.m. CST

    I jus wanna ride ma motorcy......

    by TheMcflyFarm


  • Jan. 31, 2009, 6:25 p.m. CST


    by BringingSexyBack

    That would be so awesome.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 6:44 p.m. CST

    eccleston is in

    by bacci40

    im gonna download it and just fast forward to his parts

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 6:47 p.m. CST


    by slkboxrman

    asses like u have nerve criticizing movies for no quality and treating the audience like idiots but then contradict yourself by saying you would goto the movie to see tits..real intelligent of u....van helsing was a great action movie, and mummy 2 was the same as 1 and 3, campy and fun movies...and get off transformers dick would u, 700 million in the bank...only the minority of geek fanboys complain about figures that the same group would complain about gi-joe.....and seriously, what was wrong with die hard 4 ? cuz it wasnt rated R ? you and people like you should stop using the internet as your personal bitching ground....make a comment, keep it short, and move along...opinions are great, but not long boring sermons about what movies u dont like.....and to the rest of u bitching.....its a 30 second teaser, wait till a full trailer comes out or go and see the movie then bitch about it if you want to..... u all know ur gonna be online in your g-joe uniforms from the 80s....get over yourselves .... have fun all !

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 7:11 p.m. CST

    Actually, Jay Baruchel

    by Mr. Zeddemore

    Would be fucking great as Dr. Light.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 7:12 p.m. CST

    You're deluded if you think this will fail

    by WillyWonky

    It's an awfully short clip of mostly action and haters are ready to say the film will fail. I guarantee at a minimum my son and I will be there opening day; as will a nation full of families that will be checking this out. Big, FUN, action film which is what Sommers does best. C'mon folks it's GI Joe not Hamlet.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 7:20 p.m. CST

    It looks fun....and better than T4.

    by TheWaqman

    McG's bastardizing a once great franchise and the trailer was boring and homogenized. Transformers 1 was abit too long and Shia Labeouf was fucking annoying but it was flashy, it still sucked though. This film looks like it has the flashiness of Transformers, minus the annoying attitude of Ladouche. I'm in for some stupid fun.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 7:28 p.m. CST

    Everone in same black outfits = lack of imagination

    by kevred

    Looks better than poor expectations led us to think, but take off the label GI Joe, and would anyone think this was GI Joe? It looks like generic black-garbed action squad #43. It's too uptight and concerned with being "cool" to be fun. Say hello to the next Fantastic Four movie--no merit but convinces enough suckers to make money.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 7:52 p.m. CST

    Hmmmm, still no Cobra Commander?

    by sonnyfern

    Is he even in the movie?

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 7:59 p.m. CST

    Where's the Joe theme song?

    by SnyGuy

    Where's the theme song? and no "YOOO Joe !!!" c' better be in the movie somewhere.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 8:12 p.m. CST

    Clip looks cool.

    by malificus

    Dennis Quad is a bit of a distraction, but I'm down.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 8:15 p.m. CST

    the uniforms still look gay

    by zooch

    I can't get past that

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 8:16 p.m. CST

    Also nice to see DannyGloversDickBlood...

    by TheWaqman

    ...make such a dumb trollish comment. He never fails to disappoint.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 8:18 p.m. CST

    the suits...

    by Bouncy X

    i dont get the complaints about their suits...they're a military unit, of course they all wear the same thing. and seeing as how black is a pretty common color for tactical units, its to be expected. what were people expecting? a guy in a 1950's sailor suit, a guy in a winter parka and a football player driving around in yellow tiger striped jeeps?

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 8:21 p.m. CST

    More slow-motion CGI nonsense from Sommers.

    by Nosferatu Jones

    This douche burned me for the last time with VAN HELSING. I'll be avoiding this like the plague, thank you very much. Poor, poor Dennis Quaid...

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 8:27 p.m. CST

    This movie is sure to make $200 mil-$300 mil

    by bigbaldpapa

    Big talkback already. Good or bad that usually means moneymaker.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 8:47 p.m. CST


    by Dijjot

    the crysis movie doesnt look that bad. they forget the ice beam shooting aliens and korean military though. unless the fiery redhead was NK

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 8:48 p.m. CST

    The script review is accurate by this trailer

    by Rufferto

    and the costumes you can tell it is. That review was out quite awhile ago. So I don't know why people expect Cobra commander to show up or Destro to have a mask. AICN didn't report it though.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 8:49 p.m. CST

    they've got my $$$$

    by porkinz the x-wing instructor

    stop whining, this looks insanely awesome, and someone said it best above: the original cartoon was a fucking commercial for the toys that you, me, and everyone else bought. stop bitching and moaning about van helsing too. sommers has his style, and its thrilling and effective, and none of you cubicle jockeys could ever do any better. all you do is sit at your jobs, clicking PLAY on quicktime trailers all day long...that hardly makes you qualified to trash a movie, particularly using a 15 second Superbowl trailer as your guide. if you're going into this thinking, "Sommers BETTER have made an Oscar-worthy G.I.Joe NerdFest for me and me alone, FUCK ALL OF YOU. You're just a bunch of haters with nothing positive to say. now go back to writing code for peta or's websites.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 8:52 p.m. CST

    Porkinz..get outta there!

    by malificus

    He's on your tail! Can't shake him! Bzzzzzhhhhhhhoooommm!

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 8:55 p.m. CST

    So people who said I Shouldn't of judged

    by Rufferto

    By a script report were dead wrong as usual. But most of you cunts don't like people to judge a movie even if they didn't like the trailer or would whine that it's "Unfinished" Honestly you defend it like it was you who flushed the hundreds of millions of dollars down the toilet to make it.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 8:56 p.m. CST

    by the way,

    by porkinz the x-wing instructor


  • Jan. 31, 2009, 9 p.m. CST

    Liek the original cartoon was a commerical

    by Rufferto

    All yu haeter best shtu Up11 Cuz like the m ovie wont be uh commercal! Haeterz! by duh way you are nerdz! But im not of course. you know why cuz liek im too dumb to be 1 and I liek shit. Preferably whne i pay for it wth my own walet! Moovie pwnz!

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 9:01 p.m. CST

    Ooh my, that was horrid.

    by Dingbatty

    Since when can Snake Eyes defy physics? Is he a superhero now?<p>The fact that Dennis Quaid refused to say the name of his squad demonstrates that the creators of this movie are embarrassed by the source material.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 9:03 p.m. CST

    And yet another cheeseball posse walk.

    by Dingbatty

    Haven't we seen that enough?

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 9:05 p.m. CST

    This movie is mainly aimed at...

    by samuraiyao

    Mexican babies...

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 9:08 p.m. CST

    This is weird.

    by malificus

    When the Transformers came out all the cartoon geeks blew their wads all over it and I fucking hated it, but I never watched the Transformer cartoons. Did the cartoon lovers hate it when they showed advance clips like all these G.I. Joe purists seem to? How can you guys get so worked up over such a bland, meaningless product? It was just a half-hour advert for toys, and granted the preview is only a few seconds long but everything I've seen so far makes me interested and looks pretty kick ass, so why the hate? This shit looks like it's taking something dated and retarded and making it cool and awesome. If you old-school Joe fans are so hardcore buy the cartoon on DVD, I'm sure it's out there somewhere, good god, it's got Refrigerator Perry in it dudes.Didn't it?

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 9:28 p.m. CST

    well-said, Malificus.

    by porkinz the x-wing instructor


  • Jan. 31, 2009, 9:44 p.m. CST

    not enough outrage!!

    by Itto Ogami loses Daigoro

    if this was transformers, could almost ensure 1000+ post count by now.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 9:44 p.m. CST

    Welcome to the biggest turd of the summer.

    by The True Priapic

    God,that looks like shit.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 9:50 p.m. CST

    THE DESTRO is an awesome metal band from Texas...

    by uberfreak

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 9:50 p.m. CST

    ... and this GI Joe incarnation will fail.

    by uberfreak

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 10:03 p.m. CST

    I think the scene on the bus..

    by malificus

    ..with the dudes smashing through the windows looks cool as hell. I've said it before but even the most mundane movies these days are bringing the action, I'm tellin' ya, I grew up with Lou Ferrigno and stuntmen off springboards into empty cardboard boxes and I say flicks these days are delivering the goods action-wise. Of course, that's not to say even action movies can't suck when they are completely inane *couch*Transformers*cough* but shit, cheer up men, it will certainly beat whatever piece of shit that asshole Quinten Tarantino is working on, right? ALL you bitches will see it, you....and you.....aaannnnnddd yyyyooooooouuuuuuuu....(pointing finger directly at you)

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 10:04 p.m. CST

    couch coughers..

    by malificus

    ..they're the worst of all.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 10:24 p.m. CST


    by jimmay

    Children, children. No one, repeat, no one, takes anything written in all caps longer than three to four words even remotely seriously. Take a xanax, think about what you want to say, and do try not to live up to the negative fanboy stereotype, won't you?

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 10:43 p.m. CST

    $5 says that porkinz is an ANNOYING KID.

    by TheMarineBiologist

    Jeez dude... lay off the caps lock.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 10:58 p.m. CST

    Looks Fucking Awesome!

    by AD_Skinner

    It’s like a live-action Team America for crying out loud! Inspired! God willing this will be Megaforce for the noughties. You haters are gonna be lapping this up come summer and you know it.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 11:07 p.m. CST

    Eccleston quit Who for THIS???

    by ChrisPC24

    He quit because Doctor Who was too cheesy, and wanted to make "serious Hollywood films". Citizen Kane this isn't!

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 11:16 p.m. CST

    Beaks is dead on the money...

    by bravogolfhotel

    ...about the collapsing Eiffel Tower being the sort of thing you'd see in the cartoon (of course, there was a noticeable gulf between the deliberately humorous and playful cartoon and the chipper but basically grave Milton Caniff-like military adventure of Larry Hama's comics stories, and I think that's the source of some of the fan resistance).

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 11:19 p.m. CST

    Could be good

    by Charlie_Allnut

    Too short to tell one way or the other really.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 11:21 p.m. CST

    Whats with the skull faced stormtroopers?

    by S-Mart shopper

    and the mouth on snake eyes bodysuit is this years little miss nipples on batman

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 11:32 p.m. CST

    scrq u haters

    by Patch

    Sommers is the perfect man for the job. Snakes eyes and Storm Shadow onscreen! Disintegrating landmarks, Duke, Scarlett... Awesome Rediculousness onscreen. Get into it!

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 11:43 p.m. CST


    by SomaShine

    oh wow...just wow..this is going to suck so the VO reading that off a piece of construction paper?..Ok I will admit I thought about jerking one to Sienna Miller on that openign shot but"hey, I liked the Mummy so this looks good"..get a clue.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 11:52 p.m. CST

    I WISHED THEY HAD GONE R!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    by Illuminate

    I WISH SOMEONE IN HOLLYWOOD WOULD GROW BALLS LIKE JAMES "TERMINATOR 2-RATED R" CAMERON. Everyone who watched the cartoon are now full grown adults and GI Joe was entertaining back then but, now we want more: Sienna naked fucked Sharon Stone style and Duke blowing off Cobras head. But, that is not going to happen. I hope they make it as PG-13 as possible. I like it. It is kind of cheesy looking like The Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. It it has more realism than Skull than I am there. I am glad they didn't go the boring Borne Identity look aka make shit look fucking ugly like they are doing in most movies these days. I wished they had stuck to the original costumes more. Transformers looks ten times more close to the cartoon than this. Snake eyes looks bad ass. I hope they focus on his story. Also, Cobra Commander better have the bad ass voice. I could not believe that Micheal Bay (who is a genius) took out Megatrons cool voice. It was what made him cool like Darth Vadars voice. Sienna Miller looks hot as hell. Baronas was the least attractive in the cartoon when I watched it as a kid. It looks like she made that character the most attractive.

  • Jan. 31, 2009, 11:59 p.m. CST

    FIX THE TOWER EFFECT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    by Illuminate

    Whoever did the special effect for the eiffel tower is a lazy bastard and should be fired. It looks like a cheap special effect for a tv movie of the week on the sci-fi network. Other than that I'm there at the movies for this one. LET'S ALL PRAY THAT IT IS NOT CAMPY LIKE BATMAN AND ROBIN WAS.

  • Feb. 1, 2009, 12:31 a.m. CST

    My cock hurts.

    by The True Priapic

    Anything with Sienna Miller in it is always dross.Name a fucking picture with her in it that is any good?Don't say Layer Cake.That's cock as well.She can't act and has pymie's cocks for tits.

  • Feb. 1, 2009, 12:52 a.m. CST

    Geek Molester

    by mukhtabi

    If you are truly so unhappy and miserable in this country of ours, you have two choices. You can leave or you can off yourself. Either way, spare us the gory details you miserable, self-serving, arrogant, loathsome, foul-mouthed cuss.

  • Feb. 1, 2009, 1:33 a.m. CST

    This is horrible.

    by Baked

    No good, very bad, eh...? <p> What's with the cheesy bionic suits and shit? GI Joe just does some kung fu and shoots people with lasers. Why can I find better character design in the comic?

  • Feb. 1, 2009, 1:40 a.m. CST

    I'm ACTUALLY interested in seeing more!

    by TheGhostWhoLurks

    'Cause what's in that teaser looks pretty cool. Of course, the teaser could've just shown the best parts of the movie. But it's a good teaser. :)

  • Feb. 1, 2009, 1:46 a.m. CST


    by LaserPants

    I love PATHS OF GLORY! I've seen it many,many times. I love all of Kubrick's films, really. Good point, though; it clearly is an anti-war film, and the battle scenes are shot in such a way that they seem terrifying and sad (as actual war is) not "bad ass" or "cool."

  • Feb. 1, 2009, 1:55 a.m. CST


    by geek molester

    that was original. yawn.

  • Feb. 1, 2009, 2:11 a.m. CST


    by malificus

    The thing is people come to sites like AICN so they can (hopefully) get an early peek at some new upcoming property, and many directors these days know the value of that and try and get buzz going by releasing early action scenes and such. THEN, the very people who come here for just that sort of peek run roughshod over stuff when it is nowhere NEAR finished, hell, prejudge a 2 hour movie based on a few scant SECONDS of footage. Does that seem stupid to anyone else? These directors get excited about the work they do, hell you can bet when some action sequence is coming together and they get some new effects work in they're probably geeked as hell and WANT to show it off. Then they do and it's all this, and they probably shrug and wonder why they even bother. All you pissers that are complaining it isn't real GI Joe would do well to realize a whole bunch of people are working VERY HARD to produce this product JUST FOR YOU. I mean, if you were a parent and your kid came home with a crooked lump of clay and said they made you a pencil holder would you smash it over their heads and scream in their face:" You call that a pencil holder?!? PORK CHOP SANDWICHES MOTHERFUCKER!!" probably would...

  • Feb. 1, 2009, 2:14 a.m. CST

    Big Shock of the day:

    by Playkins

    G.I. Joe will be a kid-friendly brainless action movie. Who would have thought that in a million years? It's G.I. Joe, not the Iliad, folks.

  • Feb. 1, 2009, 2:26 a.m. CST


    by BigMonsterRodeo

  • Feb. 1, 2009, 2:38 a.m. CST


    by Tempermental

    And get off my ice! Take the stick! No! Don't take the stick!

  • Feb. 1, 2009, 2:53 a.m. CST

    Watch this and Transformers back to back

    by onezeroone

    I just did and can't help notice the similarity in visual style. Sommers aping Bay. I guess that's what the logline said... Transformers, only with super ninjas instead of giant robots.

  • Feb. 1, 2009, 3:30 a.m. CST

    Looks Weak

    by Media Messiah

    Little kids might like it though.

  • Feb. 1, 2009, 4:14 a.m. CST

    Let's play it safe to avoid the cheese.

    by Orionsangels

    The Joes costumes all look similar. There's nothing to really differentiate them from one another. They kind of did that with the X-men movies as well. They try to play it safe by having everything look uniformed. If each one looked just like the cartoon or comic. It comes off cheesy like the street fighter movie.

  • Feb. 1, 2009, 5:17 a.m. CST

    Yes. YES YES YES.

    by GregoryHarbin

    Take this from a guy who loved The Mummy and Transformers, but, I'm excited. This looks big and dumb. As long as I can still get QUALITY TV and movies elsewhere, I don't mind seeing an awesome stupid movie here and there.

  • Feb. 1, 2009, 6:21 a.m. CST


    by lamontshadow2010

    was that a trailer for the live action version of team america? lol

  • Feb. 1, 2009, 6:58 a.m. CST

    Globally this movie will have seriously big problems selling...

    by wowsah156

    did they not watch Team america?! Thats this first thing that came into my head when i saw the Eiffel tower collapse. When the world is fed up seeing americans brandishing guns in foreign lands, this isnt going to paly well in Europe or Asia. not saying it looks bad. but the timing couldnt be worse.

  • Feb. 1, 2009, 7:49 a.m. CST

    i think it will do well in asia

    by Dijjot

    for the pirates.

  • Feb. 1, 2009, 9:17 a.m. CST

    Count your blessings, haters

    by spud mcspud

    At least Shia LeBouef ain't in this movie. NONONONONONONONONONO!!!<P> On the down side, this looks like shit. I don't even know what the fuck a GI Joe is - cartoon or toy line - and I'm not sure I care. Just bleurgh...

  • Feb. 1, 2009, 10:06 a.m. CST

    This isn't your grandma's GIJOE. It's Scifi GIJOE

    by Orionsangels

  • Feb. 1, 2009, 10:30 a.m. CST

    Whoever mentioned international box office...

    by rbatty024

    is probably right. International numbers have become more and more important over the years. If this bombs overseas maybe it will send the message that nobody wants to see rubber looking CGI and cheesy dialogue. A film can be fun and still be well crafted, just look at Iron Man or the first Pirates of the Carribean.

  • Feb. 1, 2009, 10:39 a.m. CST

    That Looks Paulblarttastic!

    by IAmMrMonkey!

  • Feb. 1, 2009, 10:57 a.m. CST

    Redheads in fetish wear, rental here I come

    by Stormwatcher

    cuz it could get awkward in theatres

  • Feb. 1, 2009, 11:01 a.m. CST


    by Zandunga

    I had a hard time reading your comment because you obviously have a hard time expressing yourself like a normal human being. Maybe you're 12 years old? If you're any older than that, I feel sorry for how poorly educated you are - your post is so rife with poor spelling, incoherent ideas, no use of syntax, nothing. It's just a pitiful plea to our educational system, "please help me!". But you say it all when you express how much you admire Mummy 3 and Van speaks volumes and basically says, "Yes, I am a lobotomized, lowest common denominator, Middle America moron." Good on ya lad. No reply needed after knowing you lack the capacity and education to even understand it.

  • Feb. 1, 2009, 12:07 p.m. CST

    It would've been extremely relevant pre-OKCity

    by lynxpro

    The mythos of the GI Joe Marvel Comic would have been extremely relevant to be adapted to the big screen before the Oklahoma City bombing happened. Before that, the "Patriot" movement was gaining momentum. The Oklahoma City bombing killed that movement just as 9/11 made it virtually impossible for those "lovable freedom fighters" known as the IRA to continue raising money in the USA for their cause. In the Marvel Comic, Cobra Commander created his neo-fascist movement in the economic downturn that had hit Middle America. During Bill Clinton's first term, there was quite a bit of angst and paranoia in the American consciousness (look at the success of *The X-Files*). It would've really worked then. Now an adaption has to be all about action and not so heavy on plot. Of course, most old school GI Joe fans never read the comic book and only know the property via the substandard (in comparison) cartoon.

  • Feb. 1, 2009, 12:34 p.m. CST

    having said that...

    by lynxpro

    ...Snake Eyes vs. Storm Shadow looks wicked. Scarlett and Baroness look hot. Plus General Hawk is clearly in control and not some ridiculous Master Sarge like Duke which was probably the stupidest thing ever done by the cartoon (and not the comic).

  • Feb. 1, 2009, 12:49 p.m. CST

    The uniforms in the cartoon weren't THAT unrealistic

    by zooch

    This is truly GI JOE in name only...and they don't even use that name apparently. Give it another title and you wouldn't even know it was GI JOE. If it even resembled the cartoon slightly we'd be geeking out right now, but we aren't.

  • Feb. 1, 2009, 1 p.m. CST

    paul blart should be the villain in iron man2

    by ironic_name

    keep the seg whahey brotherhood going!

  • Feb. 1, 2009, 1:24 p.m. CST

    Transformers blows this away

    by memento108

    Lame teaser.

  • Feb. 1, 2009, 1:50 p.m. CST

    Come on, guys.

    by Orbots Commander

    You have to go into seeing this movie with the expectation limbo bar set pretty friggin' low. As in, ankle level. We're talking about a movie with character names like General Hawk, The Baroness and Cobra Commander, directed by Van Helsing's Stephen Sommers, starring Marlon Wayans. And I'm not knocking it; the trailer is marketing the flick as an action movie for ten year olds, and that's fine. I can't wait to download the torrent.

  • Feb. 1, 2009, 1:52 p.m. CST

    Michael Bay is a rich man's Stephen Sommers...

    by Anti-fanboy

    More style, more substance. More intelligence, but not much. Suddenly Transformers looks slavishly faithful to the source.

  • Feb. 1, 2009, 2:30 p.m. CST

    I like that they've made Duke

    by IndyCollector

    Look like the original G.I. Joe action figure, complete with scar on his face.

  • Feb. 1, 2009, 2:36 p.m. CST

    International audience want to see

    by dioxholster

    an American movie talking about america, if they dont then fuck'em let em make their own gijoe movies if they can lol shitholes like africa and mideast and pretentious wannabes like europe and asia can kiss my metallic ass.

  • Feb. 1, 2009, 2:43 p.m. CST

    International audience want to see america

    by ironic_name

    nuked beyond oblivion.

  • Feb. 1, 2009, 3:10 p.m. CST

    If it werent for America the world wouldnt exist

    by dioxholster

    America is the reason these pigfuckers still have a decent living, but shitbags like them dont apreciate so i saw leave them to the wolves, let someone like hitler butfuck them one by one till they beg America for help and only then will america respond. USA! USA! USA! USA FTW!

  • Feb. 1, 2009, 3:33 p.m. CST

    that was pretty awful

    by Judge Briggs

  • Feb. 1, 2009, 5:32 p.m. CST

    look good

    by j2talk

    but then it SHOULD look more like say Under Siege than Saving Private Ryan ....

  • Feb. 1, 2009, 10:01 p.m. CST

    Still skeptical, And I was a huge Joe fan/collector

    by Stalkeye

    First things first, you can't a special missions anti terrorist force dressed all in black.And there's no ARAH as Hollywood has gone politically correct. (Breaker is an Arab? WTMF?) Not to mention this movie pales in comparison to the comic let alone the Konami arcade game.We'll see what's up this coming august.<p>I still would prefer monica belluci as the Baroness, but it's not my call now is it?

  • Feb. 1, 2009, 10:14 p.m. CST

    Atleast it will do better than Speed Racer and Indy IV

    by Stalkeye

    Just sayin.

  • Feb. 1, 2009, 11:47 p.m. CST

    why is everything THE RISE OF...

    by DigitalBeachWar

    looks fucking dumb ass fuck...

  • Feb. 2, 2009, 1:45 a.m. CST


    by lynxpro

    We need more Monica Bellucci goodness in this fugly world. I was a strong supporter of her being cast as The Baroness; same goes for either Talia Al Ghul or Catwoman in the next Nolanverse Batman adventure...although I prefer her as Talia.

  • Feb. 2, 2009, 2:41 a.m. CST

    "From the director of the Mummy"

    by Motoko Kusanagi

    Hahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!<p>Epic fail.

  • Feb. 2, 2009, 3:49 a.m. CST


    by codymr

    "Sienna Miller: Rise of My Cobra... That is all." LOL! Best line in this talkback.

  • Feb. 2, 2009, 8:02 a.m. CST

    Spider-man wants his stunts back

    by Abominable Snowcone

    Since when does Snake-Eyes or any Joe leap 25 feet in the air over spinning vehicles?

  • Feb. 2, 2009, 8:06 a.m. CST

    I didn't see a single red or blue laser

    by Abominable Snowcone


  • Feb. 2, 2009, 8:38 a.m. CST


    by Abominable Snowcone

    put some librarian glasses on Idina Menzel. There's your baroness

  • Feb. 2, 2009, 8:56 a.m. CST

    Quaid greatnesss vs Wayons crappiness

    by Grammaton Cleric Binks

    equals cancellation on both ends, and a neutrality. But add Ray Park and Mr. Echo, and we're on the plus side of greatness again.

  • Feb. 2, 2009, 9:02 a.m. CST

    Most cliche shot ever

    by Abominable Snowcone

    Nothing says "don't take this movie seriously" like an extended shot where all the heroes line up together and walk down the street

  • Feb. 2, 2009, 9:22 a.m. CST

    What is with the ripped off shot from Transformers?

    by StovetopStuffin'

    And the city-destroying algae? ugh. I wanted a grown up version of the 80s show, not this bullshit.

  • Feb. 2, 2009, 9:55 a.m. CST


    by Grammaton Cleric Binks

    No, forget the cartoon. Most Joe fans want the comic book version. The cartoon was just that, a cartoon. Red and blue laser? C'mon.

  • Feb. 2, 2009, 11:53 a.m. CST


    by Stalkeye

    Most of the casting(or lackthereof) sucks IMO. Quaid seems credible but Wayans and Chatham? WTF. Sienna may just pull it off as Baroness, but I just can't help but wonder how Monica would look in leather clad bodysuit w/glasses.<p>The Joe uniforms are the biggest letdown and as Gram said in an earlier thread; It looks like someone raided the Batcave and stole Wayne's spares. The guys at my job is going gaga for this, but wtf do they really know.Another franchise basterdized.

  • Feb. 2, 2009, 12:06 p.m. CST

    BTW Abom is right about that cliche shot

    by Stalkeye

    afterwards, i thought to myself; "where the eff are the sentinels or the brotherhood of evil mutants"? gaaayyyyyy. Good call.<p>Byew,Byew,Byew!

  • Feb. 2, 2009, 12:53 p.m. CST

    Saw it live during the SB

    by nobunaga209

    and I jizzed in my pants!!!

  • Feb. 2, 2009, 12:58 p.m. CST

    Sommers is my personal Uwe Bowl

    by uberman

    DEEP RISING is one of my all time WORST movies by far. Everything else he has done has been horrible as well, but DEEP RISING set the bar really, really, really low.

  • Feb. 2, 2009, 1:07 p.m. CST

    its good that we have an america

    by ironic_name

    where else would we put the americans.

  • Feb. 2, 2009, 1:09 p.m. CST


    by Abominable Snowcone

    You missed me!<p> BEYEW BEYEW BUH-BEYEW!

  • Feb. 2, 2009, 2:39 p.m. CST

    working Title: UN PEACEKEEPERS

    by ArcadianDS

    "What did you say the name of your unit was again?"<p> "We're all US Military commando/special forces personnel, but for the purposes of marketing this movie worldwide, we're just gonna wink and smile at you whenever you ask us that question. Suffice to say that with the brazen attack on France's massive erector set construction toy, we'll be operating as agents of France. VIVE LA JOE!!!

  • Feb. 2, 2009, 3:16 p.m. CST

    The Baroness

    by Arghh

    The Baroness looks so cool... especially the scene where she is in sunglasses and shooting guns at the screen. I was like "who is that actress" I went to imdb and was surprised to find out this was Sienna Miller... I mean, I had read that it was Sienna Miller before, here on aintitcool news, but I'd forgotten. They did such a good job of making her look different, now here's hoping that the movie is good.

  • Feb. 2, 2009, 4 p.m. CST

    Is it possible to make a movie crappier than TF?

    by Le Chevalier Noir

    "Find out this spring, as we meet our contestants!" lol. Well... I might pay to see Trek, but I don't know about the rest. A positive surprise will occur if Joeys delivers more than just another Highly Relevant Nu-metal Soundtrack.

  • Feb. 2, 2009, 8:47 p.m. CST

    Will Stan Lee be in this one?

    by torpedoboy

    It WAS a Marvel comic, right?

  • Feb. 2, 2009, 9:40 p.m. CST

    Highly Relevant hahahaha

    by darthSaul666

    Highly Relevant Nu Metal = ripping off Pantera

  • Feb. 3, 2009, 5:34 a.m. CST

    sunshine dey ya

    by The Amazing G

    no fidda bus ridah