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5 new posters for GI JOE hit the nets!

Hey folks, Harry here with the latest GI JOE posters. I'm not really sure what they're really selling here other than how fit the actors are - and how well the costumes look in shadowy cool they look. But tonally it doesn't really tell us anything about the movie. I think that'll change this Sunday when we see what they show us during the SUPER BOWL. Till then, here's your latest glimpse, publicity fashion...

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  • Jan. 27, 2009, 5:54 a.m. CST

    All they need to do to sell this flick is...

    by Droid

    "From the director of The Mummy Returns"<p>That will put bums on seats.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 5:57 a.m. CST


    by CGI_Pants

    Why do they look like they're from the Matrix?

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 5:57 a.m. CST

    The baroness

    by Varakor

    is making me drunk with all that ass inside them... pants...

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 6:02 a.m. CST

    I'm excited to see this

    by IndyCollector

    I just don't like that the characters are so indistinguishable (besides Snake Eyes) other than man, woman, white or black. I get why you can't have a character like Deep Six (I know he's not in the movie) running around in scuba or diving gear but they could have done SOMETHING to highlight each character's specialty.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 6:06 a.m. CST

    Aimed for boys aged 4 - 6

    by ricarleite

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 6:06 a.m. CST

    the least exciting film of the summer

    by Mr Gorilla

    Thank god the failure of The Spirit showed that you need to do more in a film than dress beautiful actresses up in tight leather/plastic costumes. Sadly I don't think Stephen Sommers got the email. This looks like ridiculous gun-happy shit, too dumb even for the 13-year-old boys they are aiming this at.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 6:06 a.m. CST


    by stvnhthr

    Will there be any death in this movie? I mean these are soldiers firing automatic weapons at each other. Hasbro wants to sell toys, but I hope we get some intelligent real world military action.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 6:08 a.m. CST

    My wife...

    by oaser

    went to school with the Red Head. Who knew she'd become a version of a multi-poseable plastic action figure?

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 6:12 a.m. CST

    Speed Racer 2: GI Joe

    by brassai2003

    they don't look anything remotly military. and do not connect with the words G.I. fail.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 6:19 a.m. CST

    hope it works.....

    by j2talk

    Hope we get a nice action doesn't need to be"deep" something in tone with say Under Siege .......don't mind the costumes as they make more sense than the ridiculous GI JOE action figures ....

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 6:19 a.m. CST

    Generic Action Movie: The Motion Picture

    by Spifftacular Squirrel Girl

    Maybe a trailer will make it look like something other than people wearing black latex running around with guns and swords.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 6:20 a.m. CST

    This movie ...

    by TheCap

    ... will make "Speed Racer" look like "The Godfather". I can smell the stink coming off this pile all the way back here in January. That is all.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 6:21 a.m. CST

    Keeping an open mind

    by Melvin_Pelvis

    And fingers crossed

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 6:21 a.m. CST

    and how well the costumes look in shadowy cool they look

    by The Ringwraith

    Also classic oldschool Harry

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 6:21 a.m. CST


    by Melvin_Pelvis

    if this is a point and pose action movie....

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 6:23 a.m. CST


    by TheJake

    Woopidy freakin doo. Anyone that thinks this movie is going to "rock!" or "kick ass!!!!" probably has a 3 3/4 inch GI Joe action figure lodged in his ass.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 6:24 a.m. CST


    by rassmguy

    It's a must.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 6:25 a.m. CST

    I agree with IndyCollector: differentiation of skills,

    by CreasyBear

    specialties and costumes are what made G.I. Joe so cool to me as a kid. The variety of characters are what made that show unique, rather than it just being a ton of little green plastic army men running around. Or in this case, a ton of black-clad army men running around.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 6:33 a.m. CST

    Is this from the director of Bratz: The Movie?

    by Franklin T Marmoset

    As a concerned parent, I'd like to know whether this latest adaptation of a child's toy will be suitable for my young son, Frank, Jnr, who enjoyed Bratz: The Movie but found it a little too girly.<p>I'm assuming this GI Joe: The Movie is the same kind of thing, but aimed more at small boys than small girls.<p>Is that correct?<p>Perhaps someone here who knows a lot about these toy-related motion pictures can help me out with this.<p>Thanks.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 6:37 a.m. CST

    I think they cropped the heads.

    by red_weed

    that's just bad framing

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 6:39 a.m. CST

    That's got me sold

    by The StarWolf

    Sold on staying home, that is.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 6:43 a.m. CST

    I'd like one of those outfits.

    by Righteous Brother

    y'know just to run around in.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 6:44 a.m. CST

    Nice Ad Campaign

    by Media Messiah

    Much better than the Star Trek posters for the new movie...but I want to see a film trailer in order to get an idea of this film's direction and feel.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 6:54 a.m. CST

    Huge GI Joe fan, not very impressed.

    by BigRedMenace

    When I saw that Duke poster on Myspace this morning, I thought it was a picture of Batman's Dark Knight costume. It just looks like Snake Eyes is wearing a latex muscle shirt. I really hope the trailer knocks my socks off, I really want to dig this flick.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 6:57 a.m. CST

    Reminds me of

    by Doc_Martigan

    Ecks vs. Sever for some reason.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 6:58 a.m. CST

    Someone raided the bat cave

    by Grammaton Cleric Binks

    and stole the extra suits. I love GI Joe, but this isn't right. Thief Bagginses, we hates it.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 7:03 a.m. CST

    Sienna Miller: The Rise of My Cobra

    by DOGSOUP

    My exact thoughts scrolling down those pics: "Please show Sienna Miller in hot black leather Please show Sienna Miller in hot black leather....awesome. The only reason to see this movie be praised. It worked just fine for Underworld:Kate Beckinsale in hot leather. What happened in that movie? I wonder if I'll remember anything coming out of Sienna Miller In Hot Leather: GIJoeandsomeshit"

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 7:04 a.m. CST

    L.T. Joe: Lazer-Tag Arise

    by GutsSpill


  • Jan. 27, 2009, 7:04 a.m. CST

    Didn't they forget...

    by Life_is_Fatal

    The poster featuring Bruce Willis? You know, the one where he standing around, looking all serious and getting showered with sparks? We're talking about the same movie right?

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 7:05 a.m. CST


    by YackBacker

    I would do ungodly things to The Baroness and Scarlett... there'd be an internet fad around the video we'd make, trust me.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 7:07 a.m. CST

    Or, wait, no...

    by Life_is_Fatal

    I must have been thinking about the Dark Knight posters. God damn sparks, they're everywhere these days.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 7:14 a.m. CST

    What the fuck.... no colors at all????

    by Seth Brundle

    everyone is 100% completely fuckin black??????? WTF are they thinking.... i dont see GIJOE here, not watching this on theater, it deserves to bomb

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 7:22 a.m. CST

    Black leather...

    by Cl_Kilgore

    They're all dressed in black fetish wear? Gay. Don't know about anyone else but I've never seen any Navy Seals or Rangers running around in anything like this. I'll be waiting for the vampires and werewolves to appear...

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 7:25 a.m. CST

    Lucious Fox is marketing the Bat Suit

    by richievanderlow

    to the military it looks like, and they're buying it. Way to rip off!

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 7:25 a.m. CST

    Snake Eyes looks silly

    by Bass Ackwards

    Might as well just have had him put on one of those muscle t-shirts.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 7:26 a.m. CST

    Matrix Reloaded wants its posters back...

    by knowthyself

    ...cutting off at the eyes. Nice way to steal their idea.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 7:26 a.m. CST

    OK, so...

    by BizarroJerry

    When they make superhero movies, they decide that they have to make some changes to the crazy outfits they wear so as not to look silly in the real world. THEN, we have characters who all, with a few exceptions, wear actual real world clothes that one may find in the military... and they CHANGE THEM TO SUPERHERO COSTUMES. Brilliant, Hollywood, just brilliant.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 7:29 a.m. CST

    love how they used MS Paint to put shades on the last one.

    by knowthyself

    I guess they thought it looked too much like the other nameless girl above her.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 7:29 a.m. CST

    if they ever make a movie based on...

    by PezQ

    ..Mass Effect. They could steal that first poster. IT'S SHEPARD I TELL'S YA!.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 7:31 a.m. CST

    Tonally G.I. Joe will be absolute mince

    by kwisatzhaderach

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 7:35 a.m. CST

    Eddie Murphy's in G.I Joe?

    by RadioEdit

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 7:40 a.m. CST

    G.I. Joe: Resolute

    by Dingbatty

    will whup the shit out of this movie:<p>

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 7:43 a.m. CST

    Since Snake Eyes is our most popular character...

    by rev_skarekroe

    ...what if we made EVERYONE in the movie look like Snake Eyes? Genius!

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 7:43 a.m. CST

    Since Snake Eyes is our most popular character...

    by rev_skarekroe

    ...what if we made EVERYONE in the movie look like Snake Eyes? Genius!

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 7:45 a.m. CST

    I don't like the black leather, either

    by Abominable Snowcone

    Give them something from their respective comic book uniforms to help distinguish them. But no, now everyone is dressed like the baroness

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 7:51 a.m. CST

    Are these posters for X-Men 4?

    by GrandMuffTarkin

    Cause they sure as hell look like it.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 7:55 a.m. CST

    News Flash - next Superman costume will be black.

    by GrandMuffTarkin

    Oh wait, they've done that already in the comic books. Nevermind.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 7:55 a.m. CST

    Are these posters for X-Men 4? by GrandMuffTarkin

    by Dead_Geek

    Ditto. Looks like Summers has another piece of crap on his hands.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 7:56 a.m. CST

    YO WEAK!!!

    by tylerzero

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 8 a.m. CST

    Mommy? how come I can see Lady J's who-ha?

    by LargoJr

    my pants fit funny

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 8:06 a.m. CST

    Someone has a black leather fetish

    by indyjonez100

    Oh wait, it's just the next Holloywood "Must See" movie of the summer, yeah right.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 8:06 a.m. CST


    by Sin86a

    Nothing can sell GI Joe like an ass shot of Baroness (assuming that's who it is).

  • at least the black outfits makes sense for a commando strike force...the only reason the old GI JOE line had so many different costumes was to sell more toys

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 8:08 a.m. CST

    Fuck you, Sommers!

    by Droid

    Where's my Deep Rising sequel!?

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 8:08 a.m. CST

    No names?

    by terry1978

    With those suits, you can't tell who the fuck is how, except for Snake Eyes and maybe Baroness, the two that most people know right off the bat.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 8:15 a.m. CST

    Anyone see a script?

    by ForkTongue

    How will they crowbar the line "And Knowing is half the battle" into this movie?

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 8:17 a.m. CST

    I will see this because...RACHEL NICHOLS!!!

    by Sequitur

    When is The Inside coming out on DVD?!? Awesome show.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 8:17 a.m. CST

    Latino Review Had The Script

    by Media Messiah

    I think they said it was okay?

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 8:20 a.m. CST

    I will wait for the trailer. . .

    by Darth_Kaos

    . . .then make my judgment.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 8:21 a.m. CST


    by Err

    Is this true?

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 8:23 a.m. CST

    "cartoonish comic outfits"

    by BizarroJerry

    Actually, of the characters we see here, Duke wears a khaki shirt and olive drab pants. Ya know, Army clothes. Ripcord (I think he's supposed to be Stalker) wore green and brown camouflage. The Baroness wore exactly what she wears in this movie. Snake-Eyes is based off one of his various looks. Scarlett was admittedly dressed a bit silly, but still wearing gray and khaki.<p>So, in other words, the silliest looking characters got to keep their silly outfits, while the characters with the realistic military outfits got new Batman Begins armor. Ya know, sort of the opposite of what makes sense.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 8:26 a.m. CST

    Some things should stay in the eighties.

    by rbatty024

    I'm as much for nostalgia as the next guy, but it can't be nostalgia if its revamped for today. That's why I think Transformers, GI Joe, Care Bears, etc. should all stay in the eighties. The only exception is Exo Squad. Bring that show out of the nineties, please. Most underrated cartoon. Ever.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 8:33 a.m. CST


    by Mullah Omar

    The rest look like a PVC gimp squad. <br> <br> How exactly are we supposed to tell one person from the other? Look at their weapons rather than them?

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 8:33 a.m. CST

    Keep in mind, rbatty...

    by BizarroJerry

    that Transformers and G.I. Joe have been around since the 80s and have existed in various forms pretty much for all these years. Though, I at least agree that keeping these things away from being live-action hollywood films, and letting them remain cartoons and toys for kids may be a better way to go.<p>Except for "Frank Miller's Care Bears", coming soon to a theater near you.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 8:34 a.m. CST

    When will there be a live action Sailor Moon movie?

    by Spifftacular Squirrel Girl

    With black body armor and according to most talkbackers... starring Will Smith. Wooo.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 8:36 a.m. CST

    No jokes on this one. It will be tits.

    by Heckles

    Sorry, can't cap on this. No major live motion picture attempt. No major attempt to revive the series until now. We need this. It will rock. Like Transformers before it. Viva La Hasbro!

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 8:40 a.m. CST

    G.I. Joe: Men In Black

    by SpyGuy

    Johnny Cash called from Heaven and said "Too black."

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 8:41 a.m. CST

    Granted, I never kept up with the GI Joe or Transfomers comics..

    by rbatty024

    but as people have mentioned on this site before, both films are obviously based on the cartoons. If they chose to base these off of better source material maybe the films would be interesting, but as much as I like revisiting my childhood now and again, I can't convince myself that those cartoons were actually good. <p> Although, the thing I'm looking forward to the most in Frank Miller's "Care Bears" is Scarlett Johansen as Cheer Bear. It's gonna be a furry's wet dream.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 8:52 a.m. CST

    Its the S & M J. Crew catalog!

    by skimn

    Seriously, torsos? How creative..<p>I will reserve judgement on this also until the trailer. Sommers has said he wants this to be like old school Bond, I'm assuming Roger Moore/Moonraker, knowing Sommers. Lets hope his practical effects versus CGI ratio is heavy on the practical side.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 8:55 a.m. CST

    Fucking WEAK!!!!

    by alienindisguise

    way to go Shithead Sommers and retards at the studio. Can't wait to see Cobra Commanders mask..I'm sure it'll look like Darth Vader. Black is a pussy way out of costume design. Going with the original costumes woulda saved alot of money and would've worked. You can't even tell any of these assholes apart besides Snake Eyes. He and the Baroness are the only ones that should be in black.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 8:58 a.m. CST


    by BringingSexyBack

    The copyright lawsuit has been filed.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 9 a.m. CST

    BizarroJerry, you owe me a monitor

    by KillerTomato

    I just did a spit-take laughing at your post. And the sad thing is, I think I'd be first in line to see "Frank Miller's Care Bears." That would be HILARIOUS.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 9 a.m. CST

    by Grimmjow Jeagerjaques

    Great posters. I'd download them if I didn't hate the way most of the characters look. And how the hell is Marlon Wayans up there trying to look hard?

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 9:02 a.m. CST

    Kids movie

    by Emperor_was_a_jerk

    Yet another kids movie based on toys and cartoons that 40 year old men will complain about.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 9:08 a.m. CST

    Said it before, will say it again...FAUX JOE!!!

    by nerosday

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 9:12 a.m. CST


    by Chadley BeBay

    I don't give a dirty rats ass.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 9:18 a.m. CST

    more like GENERIC JOE

    by turketron


  • Jan. 27, 2009, 9:22 a.m. CST

    Good stuff, Frankie

    by Droid

    "as a concerned alien hunter and not too knowledgeable about ancient and violent squabblings between races"<p>Funny

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 9:25 a.m. CST

    A Metal Gear Booty call

    by KillaKane

    Generic, but probrably dumb fun if SS gets it right (after his last two efforts I'm not so sure)

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 9:31 a.m. CST

    Says a lot for the cast...

    by tiredpm

    ...when the film is being marketed by shots of the characters with their heads cut off. Nice.<P>Having said that, if this is going to be two hours of automatic gunfire, Sienna Miller's ass in leather and a scene of Snake Eyes patching up Scarlett as she strips out of her leather (you KNOW that's in there) then I'm in 100%. Now, if they could just put in Lady Jaye and Cover Girl I'd be a happy camper. Actually, if they can make the sequel (assuming this makes some cash) the Ripcord/Zartan story from the comics I'd be a VERY happy man.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 9:32 a.m. CST

    The ladies in those posters....

    by Cletus Van Damme

    ...need to put their Kung-Fu grip on my johnson, posthaste!

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 9:32 a.m. CST

    the costumes are original and creative

    by geek molester

    pure genius.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 9:35 a.m. CST

    Truly awful

    by J.B.M.A.

    A property that has the convenience to deck out it's baddies in bright primary shades,and the heroes in varying degrees of self customized combat gear, all reduced to generic 'tits on Batman' fetish wear without a hint of individualism.<p> What exactly is the point of including a charcter like the Baroness if EVERYONE is going to dress the same way?<p> Whoever costume designed this should be blacklisted for life.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 9:35 a.m. CST

    Fucking dull.

    by Smashing

    What do they think its the late 90's and everyone is excited about people wearing black and carrying guns? <P>Three words for them, Matrix abortion sequels, boring.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 9:35 a.m. CST


    by killianx

    has more Junk in the Trunk!

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 9:36 a.m. CST

    oh and i dont care what they say...

    by killianx

    GI Joe is a Real AMERICAN Hero!! you dont see James Bond all Globalized!

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 9:39 a.m. CST

    I would rather give money to this than TINTIN.


  • Jan. 27, 2009, 9:39 a.m. CST


    by Abominable Snowcone

    Actually, yes--either live action or CGI, I would prefer a Joe movie where the people wear their respective "costumes" from the comic, unless a given situation or weather called for something else (eg Deep Six would not wear his suit on land, etc). That's part of what made this Joe thing cool. Sure, you sacrifice a little realism by doing that. But who among us ever thought Joe was realistic? We're talking about a supposed elite military force that shoots blue lasers at the bad guys going "BE-YEW! BE-YEW! BE-YEW!" without ever hitting anyone<p> I do recall one comic early on that was fantastic because it was sort of realistic. Firefly and Destro were sent to the woods to ambush Snake-Eyes at his woodland retreat. They strafe his cabin and grenade it, but Snake Eyes escapes through a floor hatch

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 9:41 a.m. CST

    Black leather = G.I. Emo

    by Abominable Snowcone

    At Joe headquarters, instead of a photo of the president on the wall, there will be a photo of Robert Smith from the Cure or Al Jorgensen from Ministry

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 9:43 a.m. CST

    G.I. Emo

    by Abominable Snowcone

    in the G.I. Emo mess hall at night, they all sit down together and share cornbread while discussing their FEELINGS of isolation, detachment and alienation, and they do so in hushed, low tones and minimal eye contact. Later, in their own bunks, each cries himself softly to sleep and wakes up ashamed and angry for it

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 9:44 a.m. CST

    5 new posters

    by Abominable Snowcone

    are we sure those are GI Joe characters and not images of Marilyn Manson and his last touring band?

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 9:45 a.m. CST

    ah yes, generic film posters I pass by without glancing.

    by Gungan Slayer

    all it says to me

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 9:47 a.m. CST

    For a man to be in GI Joe

    by Abominable Snowcone

    apparently he must have splendid, high cheekbones and a well manicured goatee. Just because

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 9:51 a.m. CST

    Definitely a mix of DARK KNIGHT armor & METALGEAR SOLID

    by George Newman

    Those are Batman's abs. The close clinging suit also looks like Snake's and Raiden's in the Metal Gear games.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 9:54 a.m. CST

    And chili is half the battle!

    by Godovhellfire

    Chili for lunch.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 10 a.m. CST

    Christopher Nolan called Stephen Sommers...

    by Orbots Commander

    ...and bauled him out: "So YOU'RE the bloody wanker who stole all our extra Bat-Suits!!!" I can smell the stink of this movie here in January 27, 2009, sort of like Smell-O-Vision time travel.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 10:03 a.m. CST

    there was nothing wrong with the old uniforms

    by Itto Ogami loses Daigoro

    why do Cobra and the Joes have the same outfits?

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 10:21 a.m. CST

    Smell-O-Vision Time Travel

    by Xandar1977

    sounds brilliant. Where can I get one, and how much?

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 10:23 a.m. CST

    So Harry, you ungrateful fuck

    by the_shogun_gunslinger

    Find these all on your own? Or were the emailed to you? Thanks for giving credit. Oh wait, you didn't.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 10:23 a.m. CST

    Why does everybody have Batman's body armour?

    by The Reluctant Austinite

    This ain't the G.I. Joe I remember. Needs more white man's afros and kung fu grip.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 10:25 a.m. CST

    Pork-Chop Sandwiches!!!

    by BlackBanana

    Couldn't help myself... mostly because of how completely ridiculous this project looks.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 10:29 a.m. CST

    Problem is:

    by Raymar

    Baroness look fine, but when the Joes are dressed just like her and you can't tell the difference between them and the baddies, that's bad.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 10:39 a.m. CST

    too bad they started this before Obama...

    by iamnicksaicnsn

    I bet if they knew Obama would be president, they wouldn't have so much trepidation over the whole "Real American Hero" angle. <p> AND YES, WHY THE HELL DO THE JOES AND THE FREAKIN COBRAS HAVE THE SAME DAMNED COSTUMES??? </p>

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 10:48 a.m. CST

    We've done black leather since about David Lynch's DUNE

    by Yotz Von Frelnik

    I'm sorry but I've really had my fill of black leather body armor. Sure I don't have an idea right away on what would be better, but I can't help wishing they'd evolve the whole style into something else. Any time I hear about soldiers, commandoes, special super agents, future warriors or modern heroes, it's like OH! what a surprise... black body armor. Won't prevent me from seeing the film though.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 10:49 a.m. CST

    These are pathetic

    by the_shogun_gunslinger

    Really fucking terrible. Hopefully these suits appear at the end of the film. God, who am I kidding? After Van Helsing I really don't know how Sommers is being allowed to make another movie. Why do studios and these fucktard hack directors always insist on stripping the soul away from EVERY property they get their filthy soul-less hands on?

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 10:50 a.m. CST

    !!!! Thank you Dingbatty

    by Rufferto

    Where did that come from?! It was amazing!!! Even with shitty video it look awesome. Thanks for sharing. It's great to see something like that. What Gi joe is supposed to be instead of this piece of shit live action movie. I will be looking out for Gi Joe resolute. I didn't realize something like what i saw could exist in this day an age but Now I know! And knowing is half the battle!

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 10:51 a.m. CST

    Yep. X-Men meets Dark Knight

    by NivekJ

    Where the hell are my brightly colored camouflage uniforms? The blue and orange fatigues? The bright red Cobra mook outfits? Why the hell has everything gone black leather? Didn't you read Astonishing X-Men? Didn't you hear that black armor is officially played out (Batman excepted)? GEEZ!! Even Snake Eyes knew to wear PURPLE ninja clothes. And what's with his pants? The fuck is he wearing? Dockers?! YEESH!!

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 10:52 a.m. CST

    Is Snake Eyes wearing DOCKERS?

    by NivekJ

    A yuppie ninja. Fucking great.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 10:53 a.m. CST

    so lucuis finaly sold the military on those suits?

    by ironic_name

    Reluctant Austinite, I refuse to admit defeat.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 10:55 a.m. CST

    News Flash - next Superman costume will be black.

    by ironic_name

    that'd be cool.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 10:58 a.m. CST


    by The Ghost of Marcus Brody

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 11:09 a.m. CST

    uh, just noticed something

    by the_shogun_gunslinger

    So the tagline for GI Joe has always been "A Real AMERICAN Hero"...Soooo by that slogan I would assume they would use American military weapons. So why are they all using Bullpup style rifles? I know that sounds really minor and it is really, but jesus christ does ANYBODY who works on these films do any research of any kind? As far as I know, no branch of the US military uses a rear loading rifle... sigh.. I give up guys, I really do.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 11:19 a.m. CST

    Marlon Wayans...LOL

    by IAmJack'sUserID

    Nevermind the fact that the character's race was white in the cartoons. And the Baroness looks retarded. Should have got Evangeline Lily for that role. And Joesph Gordon Levitt as Cobra Commander? Should have got Hugo Weaving. <p></p> Ok, we know this movie already looks derivative. Who wants to bet we'll get an ending similar to Revenge of the Sith where we see Cobra Commander's mask being lowered onto his disfigured face?

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 11:22 a.m. CST

    shogun gunslinger

    by Orbots Commander

    Last I heard, G.I. Joe in the movie is now GIJOE, an international-UN like- terrorist reaction force based in Brussels. So no 'Real American Hero' tag line. The movie sounds like politically correct ASS.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 11:23 a.m. CST

    I just read more info on GIJoe Resolute

    by Rufferto

    Aint it cool news should be covering this! I have to get my news from talkback messages? Come on!

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 11:24 a.m. CST


    by IAmJack'sUserID

    The American military uses Italian Beretta 92Fs as the issue sidearm. Also, the military is looking at several foreign arms manufacturers in order to replace the M16, including the German company H&K and the Belgian company FN.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 11:27 a.m. CST


    by TheBlackKnight

    Is he wearing a sneaking suit from Metal Gear?

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 11:30 a.m. CST


    by Prof_Ender

    Costumes look like leftovers from BATMAN BEGINS.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 11:39 a.m. CST


    by slone13

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 11:42 a.m. CST

    We've Seen X-Men and The Matrix : The Movie

    by MaxCalifornia.

    If you only see 185 movies this year, make sure GI Joe is somewhere in the 170s on your list!

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 11:43 a.m. CST

    People in black with guns and shit : the movie

    by MaxCalifornia.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 11:44 a.m. CST



    This is GI Joe, its a movie based on a cartoon that was made to sell TOYS. OF COURSE IT IS GOING TO BE A STUPID MOVIE. Just get that in your heads right off the bat. Of course they have to update the characters and take away any qualities that made the characters distinguishable from one another in the silly cartoon. Like Transformers, look how well that movie did in the box office! It was an AMAZING movie! Yes, G.I.Joe the movie is going to suck but it will be a fun movie. You will see some nice asses (albeit nice clothed asses). You'll see some awesome special effects. Sit back, turn your brain off and enjoy the ride!!!!!!!!!

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 11:51 a.m. CST

    Black Uniforms


    This is what they don't understand. By making ALL the characters wear black, you TAKE AWAY from the ones who wear black normally. Snake eyes is just another black uniform wearing guy, only difference is his mask now.<p><p>MOUTH ON SNAKE EYES. WTF. Is this to express emotion? Is this so he can talk? Eat? WTF? They gave Optimus Prime a mouth so that he could be "more emotive" WTF. We don't want MORE emotive, more emotive is less bad ass. Wake up hollywood!!!!!!!!!!

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 11:55 a.m. CST

    Seriously how hard is it to fuck up Army Fatigues....

    by thecomedian

    This isn't X-Men or some other case where the director would assume the comic book costumes would look embarrassing on film. They're in the military. They could have just dressed them in military fatigues and gear and just called it a day. Cobra should look stylized but not the Joes. Stupid hack costume designers and art department. They're saving Destro and I bet he looks like shit on a stick.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 11:56 a.m. CST

    WTF -- Bruticus, are you bi-polar?

    by IAmJack'sUserID

    Or is it that my slight hangover has hampered me from seeing the satire in your first post?

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 11:59 a.m. CST

    DAMON WAYANS. that is all. thank you.


    snake eyes does look rad though...i'll give them that. i hope this is good- because gi joe is hard to fuck up, dammit.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:01 p.m. CST

    "Sit back, turn your brain off and enjoy the ride!"

    by Mullah Omar

    If the idea is still to sell toys, then I believe that the generic uniforms will hurt toy sales. These characters all look the same. With no differentiation among the characters/toys, what is the big incentive to get multiple toys? <br> <br> As an audience, why should we care if "generic black-leather guy #5" lives or dies? Transformers can be kind of cool in themselves because they are something you don't see every day. Commandos in black suits shooting guns? People can think of dozens of such movies without much effort. <br> <br> As a nostalgia trip, taking away the distinct personae/outfits of the characters pretty much nullifies any relation to GI JOE in the first place. So the old-school fans don't have any basis to latch onto this "re-imagining." <br> <br> Granted, this film reeked of suck from day one, but I am just not seeing the potential draw for ANY demographic and on ANY level. <br> <br> PS - Stephen Sommers, your cover is blown.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:02 p.m. CST

    In a world....

    by IAmLegolas

    ... where everyone wears black leather. Enjoy your Generic Global Military movie, guys & gals, I'm sure it's right up the alley of those that like that Big Robots Fighting Incoherently movie. No real fan of either franchise can be onboard with this shit.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:04 p.m. CST

    Same idiots who loved Transformers will love this

    by IAmJack'sUserID

    Oh, there certainly is a market for this crap -- it's called most of the film-going American public. You've already got name/brand recognition and it will probably be marketed the fuck out of. Mix that with the big budget action film nature of this movie and you will probably have a nice box office performance, unfortunately.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:05 p.m. CST

    Snake eyes is the only one that looks "Canon"

    by Stalkeye

    the rest of the costumes/uniforms are generic black X-men/Batman Knock offs.The cool thing about GIJ was each team member had their own look and color other words; they stood out among themselves!! Black uniforms in comic cinema is a tired trend.You can thank X-Men movies for that.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:05 p.m. CST



    No, forgot to mention my second post was the NON-sarcastic one. <p> Transformers the movie sucked. I think being as obvious as that is and being I said Transformers was an "amazing movie" the sarcasm probably won't be lost too much.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:07 p.m. CST


    by cbebop007

    Everything we've seen from this movie so far is bland, common and boring. Can't help but think this movie will be a box-office disaster.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:10 p.m. CST

    Anyone of these 'talk backers' could do it better!!!

    by Bishop6

    thats why you all are working for the movie industry..oh wait..your not are you? douche bags

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:13 p.m. CST

    Ok, Bruticus *wipes brow*

    by IAmJack'sUserID

    Well, there is quite a rabid fanbase for Transformers, especially on this site. So sometimes it's hard to detect sarcasm when referring to it.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:14 p.m. CST



    I am...

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:14 p.m. CST


    by Banzai Rootskibango

    Seriously...where the fuck is he? Is he even in the goddamn movie?

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:15 p.m. CST

    If you guys thought these Costumes were bad..

    by Stalkeye

    ..just wait till you see what Storm Shadow looks like..UGH!!Can you say "Emo prom date Ninja"??This project is doomed and will suck just like Bay's Transformers.<p>Damn you Paramount.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:16 p.m. CST



    many of us are... most people in the industry visit the site. <p>no its not my job to turn cartoons into live action movies but thats not to say anyone on this site couldn't do it better than this shit. at least by means of envisioning it. this is looking horrid.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:16 p.m. CST

    yep total MATRIX RELOADED ripoffs...way2b original.

    by FleshMachine

    they look like starship trooper...what happened to the characters individuality????

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:18 p.m. CST

    This movie better be based on the comics..not the cartoon.

    by FleshMachine


  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:19 p.m. CST

    Character individuality...


    its actually the same thing that made Transformers great. And the jumbled mess of tiny metal shards in the movie just made them all look the same...

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:23 p.m. CST

    Transformers was a Cartoon...GIJOE was a COMIC BOOK

    by FleshMachine

    the cartoon was a secondary kiddie thing.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:23 p.m. CST

    Someone Has Done Better

    by Maxwell Bishop

    The film to this link is good for a low budget fan flick. It screams a hell of a lot more like G.I. Joe than the craptistical coming this summer.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:25 p.m. CST

    G.I. think this sucks!

    by thegreatwhatzit

    G.I. Joe is supposed to be fueled on nostalgia (retro Marvel). This generic shit looks like the dancing overture to a Victoria's Secret commercial. Just remake BUCK PRIVATES and be done with it (at least some dignity would be intact).

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:27 p.m. CST

    a GIJOE movie has such huge far this looks halfas

    by FleshMachine

    snakes eyes' back story...cobra cmdrs rise to power...such great material (the marvel comic that is, NOT THE CARTOON!!!) is it true that somewhere they say "knowing is half the battle"?>>>NOOOO!!!!! thats awful and a pretty good sign that this movie will completely miss the serious tone that it should have.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:28 p.m. CST

    NICE ASS. (baroness?) probably best thing this movie has

    by Lamerz

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:31 p.m. CST

    I didn't know this was a BATMAN crossover!!

    by Lamerz

    The first poster ... what a fuckin ripoff! Oh, and nice tits on Scarlett. I'd bury my face in that.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:31 p.m. CST

    re: SHAKESPEARE ...Actually yeah it is...

    by FleshMachine

    the plots and pathos in the Marvel series (to a point) was very SHAKESPEARE! sure it was fantastic...but there was a real sense of emotion and drama. has anyone here actually read the books??

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:32 p.m. CST

    Bishop6 = tool (and not the band)

    by IAmLegolas

    G.I. JOE (and TRANSFORMERS and HE-MAN) have fantastic character designs. If you can't get that part right, the movies are doomed from the start. It's a legitimate grip to not be able to tell one character from another, when they were so distinct and memorable in their original designs (that goes for the Transformers movie, too). Stop accepting the shit already and grow up. I'd imagine that if better movies were made of either franchise, the defenders of both would abandon them pretty quickly and not settle.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:33 p.m. CST

    Stop with the "it's a cartoon, who cares"

    by BizarroJerry

    Maybe it was created as a toy-selling promo, but the cartoon and the comic books went beyond that. That's why it's remained popular. The comic, in particular was mostly pretty good. If we can have a Batman movie considered for an Oscar, why can't we have a non-stupid G.I. Joe movie? It's my opinion that if a film maker/screen writer approaches a movie thinking, "it's just a fun popcorn movie. No need to take any of it seriously" then he is a poor excuse for either. Nothing says that you can't make a fun movie and still have some seriousness. If you look at something you're adapting and don't try to take the best of it while still making something new, you're a hack.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:33 p.m. CST

    Rex Carsalot - Fucking classic! re: Frank Miller's Care Bears

    by Lamerz

    Good shit,

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:35 p.m. CST

    Wikipedia says...

    by Banzai Rootskibango

    ...that Cobra Commander will wear a "new mask" because the old one looked "too much like the Ku Klux Klan." <P> So what? Who fucking cares if it does? It was cool as fuckin hell. <P> I thought the bad guy was SUPPOSED to look like a bad guy. <P> Politically correct Hollywood bullshit if you ask me.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:35 p.m. CST

    Scarlett / Baroness nudity in this movie?

    by Lamerz

    If not, then suck-dom abounds.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:35 p.m. CST

    Way to rip the Blade Trinity posters.

    by Stuntcock Mike

    It's nice to see Snipes in this. Or not.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:36 p.m. CST

    Where are the NIPPLES!

    by ProziumJunkie

    if you're gonna rip something off DO IT RIGHT!

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:38 p.m. CST

    Who the fuck cares what Wikipedia says?

    by Lamerz

    Wikipedia is an authoritative source on movie news now? Oh, and I don't recall the Klan wearing anything remotely like Cobra Commander. Didn't he wear some mirrored (metal?) face mask with a helmet on the top.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:38 p.m. CST

    So I'm an "idiot" for thinking Transformers was a fun movie?

    by FleshMachine

    I assure you I am not. But by all means continue spewing your holier-than-thou hyperbole & elitist bullshit.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:39 p.m. CST

    Is that fuckin snake dude in this one?

    by Lamerz

    The one that was actually part snake or something. Fuck that guy.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:40 p.m. CST

    FUCK FuckMichaelBay!

    by Lamerz

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:41 p.m. CST

    We need a Scarlett shower scene in this. Seriously.

    by Lamerz

    Maybe Baroness can lather her up.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:42 p.m. CST

    where is my Zen the Intergalatic ninja

    by Datascream

    movie? seriously...

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:42 p.m. CST

    Hey I nearly forgot...

    by BizarroJerry

    Where are the interviews saying that the writers or director were big fans when they were a kid? They've already done their fan service by making Snake-Eyes look accurate and having Larry Hama as a consultant... Over the years, G.I. Joe and Transformers were always connected somehow. Out around the same time. Same people making the cartoons, same companies making the comics. Why not make the same mistakes in the G.I. Joe movie that they made with Transformers. They will also both have greenlit sequels because the large box office will assure the film makers that they did a great job...

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:43 p.m. CST

    G.I. Hoe! A real American pro!

    by Lamerz

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:43 p.m. CST

    If you think GI JOE is a cartoon...

    by FleshMachine

    then you don't know GIJOE at all...the cartoon was a fun/silly kids show made to sell toys (rad toys)...but GIJOE IS FUNDAMENTALLY A MATURE COMIC BOOK SERIES. that IS Gijoe...all the other stuff is ancillary.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:44 p.m. CST

    What about Destro? Where is he?

    by Lamerz

    Destro was the shit. You know he was hittin the Baroness.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:46 p.m. CST

    Should of just made it 80's style

    by MJDeViant

    It looks like they just stole the costumes from Blade 2. I guess I don't care though, because I will be avoiding this like I avoided Transformers.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:47 p.m. CST

    Yaaaay for the Baroness. Or should I say, Baron-ASS!!

    by Lamerz

    Ohhhhhhhhh! No? Come on, you it had to be done!

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:48 p.m. CST


    by Lamerz

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:49 p.m. CST


    by S-Mart shopper

    G.I.JINO!G.I.JINO!G.I.JINO! hehehehe!

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:52 p.m. CST

    Sgt. Slaughter will never wear that crap

    by Abominable Snowcone

    Nor will Roadblock or Gung-Ho, so lose the black spandex now<p> That said, this summer millions of 11-12 year old boys will "become men" by working it to images (mental or otherwise) of the baroness and scarlet. We know this, because that's essentially what we did

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:54 p.m. CST

    AS - too bad we didn't have a BaronAss like that

    by Lamerz


  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:54 p.m. CST

    G.I. Tom of Finland...

    by DarthChimay

    At least one the first couple...

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 12:58 p.m. CST


    by HoboCode

    This looks worse everytime something new comes out. Can't wait to see this shit. It's going to be hysterically bad.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 1:01 p.m. CST

    I'll see it.

    by MattmanReturns

    Who am I kidding?

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 1:02 p.m. CST

    If you see it, Mattman, its for the tits and ass

    by Lamerz

    You know it.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 1:02 p.m. CST

    GI Joe and Cobra wearing same gay rubber armour

    by picardsucks

    "He'll fight for tolerance where ever there's misunderstanding, GI JOE is there!!! GI JOE !!! A real global boarderless, racial diverse, sexually ambiguous, HERO, YEAH!!!! GI JOE IS THERE!!!! GI JOE!!!!!

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 1:02 p.m. CST

    I believe its Marlon Wayans

    by S-Mart shopper

    not Damon as some one mentioned above. Damon is worth watching(not in GI Joe), Marlon is a douche.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 1:03 p.m. CST

    picardsucks - that was hilarious. well played.

    by Lamerz

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 1:04 p.m. CST

    Marlon Wayans IS in fact a complete douche.

    by Lamerz

    What the fuck has that guy EVER done that was worthwhile??

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 1:04 p.m. CST

    Pure Poetry

    by DeadPanWalking

    "...and how well the costumes look in shadowy cool they look." Keats couldn't have said it better.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 1:06 p.m. CST

    Stephen Sommers sucks & this already blows!!!

    by Lance2769

    THE ENTIRE concept around the classic 80's G.I Joe toys & comics that attracted most of us when we were kids was that each "soldier" had his or her own identity. The bad-ass thing about Snake Eyes was that he was the ONLY one dressed in an all black outfit with those mysterious visors. The cool thing about Gung-Ho was that he was a Marine Grunt, dressed in his green fatigues that didn't give a shit about covering his arms to expose his Semper Fi tattoo. Even William 'The Fridge" Perry had his basic military garb BUT had his own metal football as a weapon. Everyone was unique in one way or another - first and foremost starting with their uniform!! The problem I see already in selling US this movie is EVERYONE LOOKS LIKE A FUCKIN SNAKE EYES CLONE! Stephen Sommers, you piece of shit!!! You missed the point! THAT bad ass Snake Eyes outfit IS what made him almost everyone's favorite character. Making everyone look like Snake Eyes in the film will only detract people from seeing another one of your stupid movies because then all your characters loose their individuality, their identity. Don't you see...their unique clothing/outits IS what gave them that and what made the G.I Joe concept work and ALREADY you fucked THAT up! Some may argue that the Original G.I Joes (the 12 inch Dolls) were all dressed alike. And although true, I'm speaking of the 80's G.I Joe's which because of the aforementioned, made them even more successful on their second run. Stephen, you royally screwed up the Universal Monsters franchise by pretty much doing the same thing - making each monster cookie cutter and overwhelming the film with too many monsters on the screen at one time. I was never impressed by your lame Mummy movies either. Now, you're going to fuck up another potential franchise. Give up directing and leave the "classics" alone....please!!!

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 1:06 p.m. CST

    Add this to the list of shit remakes

    by Lamerz

    Why fuckin bother if you ain't gonna do it right? *Cough* Knight Rider

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 1:07 p.m. CST

    Not one hint of Red White and Blue on the Joes??

    by picardsucks

    Not even a fucking patch with say an American, Canadian, French, Israeli, Britsh and Japanese mini flags on it?? GIVE ME A FUCKING BREAK!!! This Ameri-selfloathing bullshit has gotta stop. I hope this hunk of shit tanks fast!! After a string of America is such a big bad evil place films failing, they decide to make the most harmlessly patriotic escapist kid fare, GI FUCKING JOE, into another shame on being American film, complete with the gay muscle suits. Fuck this shit

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 1:13 p.m. CST

    This movie is only selling Sienna Miller's ass

    by SomaShine

    Which is still ten times better than what this piece of shit will actually be. Fucking WB stars and leftover batsuits.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 1:14 p.m. CST


    by MattmanReturns

    I can't deny that. That and the nostalgia factor... although as a fan I can still recognize that the cartoon sucked. Even as a kid it pissed me off that every time a plane blew up, the asshole pilot always parachuted miraculously out of the explosion.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 1:15 p.m. CST

    Marlon is the Wayan who can actually act.

    by HoboCode

    He deserved an Oscar for his part in Requiem for a Dream.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 1:16 p.m. CST

    are they gonna shot lasers?

    by S-Mart shopper

    red & blue lasers right? Oh and Snake Eyes is THE Boba Fett of GI Joe!

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 1:16 p.m. CST


    by Warcraft


  • Jan. 27, 2009, 1:16 p.m. CST

    Marlon Wayans

    by MattmanReturns

    Any opportunity he had for an Oscar was immediately negated by starring in Dungeons and Dragons.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 1:17 p.m. CST

    spell checking is for chumps!

    by S-Mart shopper

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 1:19 p.m. CST

    Marlon Wayans and Oscar in same sentence?

    by S-Mart shopper

    What I just typed is the closest he'll ever get to it.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 1:20 p.m. CST


    by uberman

    Out of ideas. GI Joe USED to be about real soldiers and real gear, not Matrix style sci fi gym boy wanna be outfits. Count this one D.O.A.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 1:25 p.m. CST



    WAKE UP. Seriously. IT WAS A CARTOON. Of course the people are going to jump out of the planes at the last minute. OF COURSE noone expects that in a fucking live action movie. They expect: Unique characters, true to their original designs and character traits intact. ITS ABOUT THE CHARACTERS. <p><p>Noone expects there to be PSA at the end of the movie, noone expects that everytime a character shoots, he misses. Noone expects the story to be self contained in the one episode. <p><p>Just as noone expected the guns to just appear in the ands of transformers. etc...etc...etc.. <p><p>And you weren't a smart kid for recognizing that. You were a dumb kid for NOT REALIZING the only reason these things happened in the cartoon was because it was illegal for it to be more realistic in children's programming.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 1:26 p.m. CST


    by zooch

    Gayer than Shipwreck. Gayer than Gung Ho.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 1:30 p.m. CST

    Bruticus, "NOONE" isn't a word

    by MattmanReturns

    Learn to spell before you insult my intelligence, faggot. Also, it wasn't 'illegal' for the show to kill people, because Robotech did it all the time. Stupid fuck.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 1:35 p.m. CST

    They shoulda made it like the GI Joes of the 60's

    by Stuntcock Mike

    12" tall. Beard. Scar. Gay.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 1:37 p.m. CST

    GI JOE: X-men with guns and no Mutant Powers!

    by GornPirate

    I loved GI Joe as a kid but this movie looks bad and really all kinds of gayed up.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 1:37 p.m. CST



    spelling corrections... the rebuttal of a true simpleton. <p><p> Let's put it this way. the writers were NOT ALLOWED to kill people or they would be fired.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 1:43 p.m. CST

    Wow, a new X-men flick!

    by DatoMan413

    What? It's not X-men? G.I. Joe?<br><br>wow.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 1:44 p.m. CST


    by MattmanReturns

    Whatever the reason for people somehow surviving massive explosions, it sucks. I liked G.I. Joe, btw, but I hated that aspect of it, and I still do. I was SMART enough as a kid to recognize that people die in war. And I don't care if it was illegal or people would be fired, there were other cartoons that killed people.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 1:46 p.m. CST


    by Ray Gamma


  • Jan. 27, 2009, 1:47 p.m. CST

    Why not green? Or dark green?

    by sapno_krei

    Before GI Joe went all rainbow brite silly, everybody was green or brown -- pretty much military colors. I don't see why they couldn't have gone this route with their costumes/uniforms. All in black, everyone looks like Snake Eyes! *Yawn*

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 1:54 p.m. CST

    I might see the flick...

    by eXcommunicated

    ...but the publicity for the film so far has been PANTS.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 1:55 p.m. CST

    the baroness =

    by vaudeville villain

    epic fail... same goes for whomever the hell marlon wayans is supposed to be.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 2:09 p.m. CST

    if i can't tell what the character's name/profession

    by vaudeville villain

    is simply by looking at them, then the studio has already ruined one of the greatest things about the toon. and i'm almost afraid to see what the other characters will look like. "so you say your name is alpine? hmmm... why do they call you that? i mean, you're not *wearing* goggles, a backpack w/ rope, etc. you're wearing all black... like every. one. else."<p> flames on optimus = fall '09 gap pants on snake eyes.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 2:10 p.m. CST


    by alice 13

    just saying. looks like a stupid abercrombie + finch ski-wear catalog shoot. wtf is sienna miller doing in this pos.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 2:12 p.m. CST


    by Thunderbolt Ross

    Stupid stupid stupid

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 2:16 p.m. CST

    Ruining Batman's costume seemed to work

    by Al Delvechio

    and he's a character people actually care about

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 2:23 p.m. CST

    So is this movie going to be black and white?

    by Series7

    Because I remember there being a tapestry of colors in the TV show. Shit ever Transformers where coherent enough to get most of the colors right.

  • In the UK GI Joe was called Action Force and instead of all american good guys the team was multinational not this film is coming and the more I hear about it it looks and feels more like Team America 2. Lets us just hope they change the title before it goes straight to DVD everywhere outside the USA.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 2:29 p.m. CST

    Castro Patrol Squad!!!!!!!

    by Turd Furgeson

    Even the girls were unsexy in those posters. Jeez this is going to be a total dumpster fire..

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 2:30 p.m. CST


    by Mullah Omar

    VV, I like the sound of that.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 2:34 p.m. CST

    Even that Sigma Six anime had some variety

    by terry1978

    The uniforms were less campy, but they had little things to let you know who each character was and their accessories coincided with their codename.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 2:35 p.m. CST

    After Transformers...

    by MonkeyLord

    I won't be holding my breath for this one. Even the posters look a bit silly. I can understand the idea of not wanting to use the original costume designs in a live action movie. They would look ridiculous. But they've ditched them in favor of costumes that are ridiculous for different reasons, which makes no sense. If they are a military organization, then have them wear military uniforms/costumes. But for cryin' out loud, don't give them hand me downs from X-Men 3. :|

  • Just sayin'...

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 2:41 p.m. CST

    STORM SHADOW poster over at

    by jermcdee along with the others

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 2:42 p.m. CST

    Artificial Muscle Suits

    by ThePilgrim

    Don't Make You Stronger. <P>Latex can't stop bullets. <P> Always aim for the head, anyways. <p> Ray Parks= The Only Good Thing In This Movie.<P> Yo Joe!

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 2:45 p.m. CST

    < Still Wishes The Xmen Wore The Silly Costumes

    by ThePilgrim

    In The Movie. Black Leather and Latex is The New Gay White.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 2:53 p.m. CST

    You people think Wolverine looks like shit and THIS IS GOOD?!!!

    by TallBoy66

    I officially don't understand any of you people. This. Looks. Like. Ass. (I may watch this film so I can pleasure myself to Rachel Nichols.)

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 2:56 p.m. CST

    by S-Mart shopper

    gi joe article

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 3:05 p.m. CST

    Will it be worse than Transformers??

    by BilboRing

    That was a heap of shit. This looks like another heap of shit.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 3:08 p.m. CST

    At least Bay would have had some Patriotism

    by picardsucks

    "He'll fight for tolerance where ever there's misunderstanding, GI JOE is there!!! GI JOE !!! A real global boarderless, racial diverse, sexually ambiguous, HERO, YEAH!!!! GI JOE IS THERE!!!! GI JOE!!!!!

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 3:13 p.m. CST


    by BilboRing

    Nobody in here said it looks good. It looks like shit covered in burnt hair.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 3:28 p.m. CST

    Another Toy movie!

    by Stengah

    Or should I say another teen comedy with the funny secret agent, a little action here and there and a whole lot of stupid.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 3:46 p.m. CST


    by gringostar

    I always thought GI Joe was lame.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 4:06 p.m. CST

    on a sidebar: if this movie actually gave a damn

    by vaudeville villain

    about its character integrity, Hugh Jackman would've made a brilliant Tomax/Xamot.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 4:08 p.m. CST

    The the world's most elite unit...

    by Knugen

    but they don't have the proper UN mandate so the just WATCH when kids are raped and shot - just like the real thing.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 4:24 p.m. CST

    i just came on the snake eyes pic

    by chaddyd

    but the rest suck butthole. i bet they won't even have Destro have a black-guy's voice.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 4:25 p.m. CST

    So this is what Bruce & Lucius do with all the spare BatSuits

    by brianinsider

    What's unique about the Baroness when every one of the JOE's dresses like her?

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 4:30 p.m. CST


    by Shermdawg

    I was-sss once-sss a man...

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 4:31 p.m. CST

    The perfect outfit for Baroness to wear.

    by Herb West

    That's right, boys. Sienna Miller AKA Baroness totally, totally nude from every angle. <p>

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 4:32 p.m. CST

    G.I. Joe: The Rise of TB Flamers

    by S-Mart shopper

    "7/8 of a Poster, 100% Suck"

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 4:57 p.m. CST

    This film is why people are excited about Avatar

    by yiannis

    Because Avatar is actually an ORIGINAL FUCKING IDEA!!!<br><br>It's not based on a toy, a comic book, a novel or a tv show and is not a remake, reimagining, refitting of or sequel to another movie.<br><br>Unfortunately, this will still make a truck load of money at the cinema, because it will be on multiple screens in every multiplex and have a nice fat summer weekend all to itself. The idiots who run the show will see a big long number in the "profit" column for this film and immediately make a sequel, so that'll be another $100 million taken out of the hands of intelligent, creative filmmakers and into the hands of an obnoxious hack to churn out more shit we've seen before.<br><br>Not that I am against adaptations as a whole, as we all know there have been plenty of very good ones (No Country, There Will Be Blood and Jesse James were all adaptations of books and let's not forget TDK!). However, let's not kid ourselves that a film based on a toy from the director of the Mummy films is going to be anything special.<br><br>To anyone who says something like "But it'll be a fun film!", yes it will, but if your standards were set a bit higher then Hollywood would have no choice but to raise its standards in response.<br><br>Even ignoring other worthy causes outside of the cinema (let's face it, there are simply too many), $100 million could be spent on a work of cinematic art that would stand the test of time for decades, maybe even centuries. Instead $100 million will be spent on a forgettable piece of shit, because people are happy to have shit forced down their throat.<br><br>Sorry to rant, but sometimes these things need to be said

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 4:59 p.m. CST

    I'll wait to see what shows up on-line...

    by lovecraftian

    ...after the Super Bowl. But if this is any indication, I'd just assume save my cash.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 5:07 p.m. CST

    Total rip off of the Matrix Reloaded

    by Jodet

    With the top of the heads cut off and everything. Oh, last poster...tits and ass galore. WTF? How cheezy and gaudy can it get?

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 5:07 p.m. CST

    its kinda funny...

    by Bouncy X

    so many are bashing this based simply on the costumes, but had they been wearing similar or exact stuff then their cartoon counterparts, every one would be like "oh i have faith" or "i'll give it a shot" or the most typical "that's spot on". maybe the trailers will show that it truly is a terrible movie but its just funny seeing opinions formed on what they wear. kinda reminds of me x-men and apparently those first two movies turned out fine despite the costume changes.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 5:09 p.m. CST

    X-men didn't have marlon wayans

    by S-Mart shopper

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 5:09 p.m. CST

    once again - can't see Snake Eyes' mouth

    by Puddleglum

    I'm telling you, they gave him fuckin lips and you're going to be pissed when you see them.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 5:14 p.m. CST

    I was all about GI Joe as a kid

    by bah

    And this does nothing for me. It's not raping my childhood or any of that. It's simply not GI Joe. It's a bland, black-and-white action movie, probably with lots of slo-mo wire-fu, that has some GI Joe names for the characters.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 5:23 p.m. CST

    Okay, it's not a USUAL Sommersverse film...

    by Anna Valerious

    ...I'd like to see more of Destro, and Disney almost ruined, er made "Sailor Moon". I was against it as they were going to set it in Cali. I know there's a Jp. district in L.A., but I don't think that there'd be a shinto shrine for Raye to live in.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 5:25 p.m. CST

    I have to admit, I do like the Storm Shadow poster.

    by S-Mart shopper

    but odds are the movie will blow

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 5:26 p.m. CST

    And also...

    by Anna Valerious

    Anything that keeps Marlon away from doing another special effects abusing movie is 100% okay with me.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 5:35 p.m. CST

    These posters would work for other movies

    by S-Mart shopper

    poster 1: Splinter Cell. poster 2: Iron Monkey 2010. poster 3: Blood Rayne:The non-Uwe Boll Edition. poster 4: Blade's Gonna Git U Sucka. poster 5: Entrapment 2:The Man Stealing Nanny

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 5:49 p.m. CST

    did MTV do this?

    by dioxholster

    those posters look like something out of a Victoria's Secret catalogue. they look uber-gay.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 5:59 p.m. CST


    by blindambition238

    I'm pretty sure that a Victoria Secrets catalog could be considered many things BUT 'gay'. Unless you're a chick.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 6:03 p.m. CST

    now we know this movie will officially be shit

    by SomaShine

    and knowing is half the battle

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 6:05 p.m. CST

    its gay because its about army

    by dioxholster

    it should appear as manly army stuff not american idol, pop star awards crap, best dancer fag shit

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 6:14 p.m. CST

    Well, they strategically aren't showing...

    by Roketopunch

    Storm Shadow because the know how gay he looks> If you guys haven't seen him he has the tuxedo like flaps on the back. He looks like he lost his job at Cobra and he had to get a job as a bathroom attendant and he turns around so the fellas can dry their hands on his flaps. You have to see the pick and you'll know what i mean.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 6:25 p.m. CST

    As I said before, Warren Ellis's upcoming

    by Dingbatty

    animated reboot -- G.I. Joe: Resolute -- is where it's at. And I'm surprised, as I'd thought Ellis would've turned his nose up at the property.<p>Interesting that the new Joe and Transformer 'toons are superior to their live-action counterparts.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 6:31 p.m. CST

    How generic can you get?

    by Power_Girl

    Characters bodies dressed in same costumes standing with their heads cut off. What a waste of paper and ink!

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 6:33 p.m. CST

    worst posters ever

    by dioxholster

    bad bad bad and gay

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 6:36 p.m. CST

    OK, they are a Special Forces Team....

    by Continentalop

    Not a Special NEEDs Team, do don't make them look so fucking retarded. <p> Ever since Matrix, everyone has said "black leather = cool." This proves otherwise.<p> The are a military special forces team, like Delta Force or DEVGRU or SAS, make them at least look like soldiers and not backup dancers from a Britney Spears concert.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 6:42 p.m. CST

    can't wait....

    by Loosejerk

    till we get an image of Cobra Commander. That'll be a geeky trip...although I just don't see this movie being cool with the current fashion direction.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 6:51 p.m. CST

    What about Brendan Frasier ?

    by davywankenobi

    Is he truly going to be Gung Ho? I have got to see that. I like the guy, but how the fuck is he gonna pull off a cajun marine? I hope it's as amusing as it sounds.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 6:57 p.m. CST

    what is not to get?

    by maxwell's hammer

    how can the producers of this film miss the mark so incredibly much when it comes to design. 80's G.I. Joe was so much an assemble-the-team type of show, and it would never have worked if the whole team was comprised of black spandex clad soldiers with swords and guns. It was the colorful costumes and personalities and unique assortments of weapons and gear that made the characters interesting. Those posters sap all the fun out of it. I know they can't have characters fighting battles wearing the bright outlandish costumes from the cartoon, but at least you could use them as some kind of inspiration for something more exciting than black spandex.<BR> <BR> Which, btw, was one of the huge strikes against Transformers. The movie executed the basic premise well enough (transforming robots fighting each other), but zapped the characters of any visual distinctiveness or personality.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 7:02 p.m. CST

    GI Blowwwwwwww!! Real American Homos

    by Stalkeye

    Sienna's ass is the only selling point however.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 7:09 p.m. CST

    FUCK these generic ass costumes! Except BaronAss...

    by Lamerz

    She wore what looked like black leather or something. Fuckin get them some military uniforms or something at least. This shit looks fuckin stupid except for the TITS AND ASS.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 7:11 p.m. CST


    by Lamerz

    Fuck the rest of the movie. They shoulda got BAY for this shit.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 7:12 p.m. CST

    Michael MUTHAFUCKIN Bay shoulda made GI Joe

    by Lamerz

    That bitch was right up in his wheel-house. Fuckin Stephen Sommers? What the fuck has that guy ever done?

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 7:15 p.m. CST

    Isn't Megan Fox up for Tomb Raider or some shit?

    by Lamerz

    Thought I read soemthing about that. Now that would be a flick worth seeing. DAAAAMN

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 7:16 p.m. CST

    GI Chen: A real Chinese hero!

    by Lamerz

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 7:16 p.m. CST

    GI Gonzalez: A real Mexican hero!

    by Lamerz

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 7:17 p.m. CST

    GI Borokov: A real Russian hero!

    by Lamerz

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 7:17 p.m. CST

    Sienna's ass is huge!

    by dioxholster

    too big im afraid and dont u hate it when they do that. when they photo a chick from behind like that while shes looking backwards with a gun or something, its so bad. its like trying to say "hey im badass girl who also happens to have a big ass; my gun is for killing but my ass of for playin"

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 7:18 p.m. CST


    by dioxholster

    what arent they americans? i thought GIJOE was about america?

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 7:19 p.m. CST

    GI Ali bin al Hussein: A real Arabian hero!

    by Lamerz

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 7:19 p.m. CST

    Did they even listen to Larry Hama?

    by Continentalop

    I know he was hired on as an advisor, but did they LISTEN to him? Because I can't see him suggesting this shit. <p> As others have mentioned, the Joes are a team of individuals with their own MOS and each wore a distinctive uniform (although camouflage was a common element).

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 7:20 p.m. CST

    Exactly. Where is the FUCKIN "real American hero"?

    by Lamerz

    PC bullshit. Americans aren't allowed to be heros. We are the fuckin villians now.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 7:21 p.m. CST

    The Best Episode Of The Entire Friggin' Series Was...

    by LaserPants

    the one where Snake Eyes, near death, got lost in the blizzardy mountains and was saved by a wolf who took him to a blind Mountain Man with magical healing powers. The best part of that was when the Magical Mountain Man made some reference to Snake Eyes being terribly hurt, scarred, and unable to speak (hence wearing the mask). Then the blind Magical Mountain Man said some kind of profound wise old man shit at him and sent him on his way. I loved that when I was a kid.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 7:25 p.m. CST

    GI Dubois: A real French hero!

    by Lamerz

    Oh, wait ...

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 7:28 p.m. CST

    Yeah, Because We ARE The Villains Now

    by LaserPants

    Bush/Cheney made it so. But, thankfully, Obama is setting us back on track. The world already loves us because of him; at least the symbol he represents; a World Symbol. Bush was only a symbol of ignorant, incompetent redneck fascists; which, of course, his administration turned out to be.<br><br> Oh, and, btw, international cooperation is the way to go, and where we're headed. No more unilateralism. Its what the vast majority of EVERYONE ON EARTH wants. Hence it is no longer about American heroes only; rather, Global Heroes.<br><br> Finally, they also have to sell the thing to other countries that, *gasp* AREN'T AMERICAN! (It's true! Theres a TON of 'em!) Why are all you psycho Uber NeoCons so friggin' sensitive about this shit? Man up.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 7:33 p.m. CST

    Look, you don't have to say REAL AMERICAN HERO

    by Continentalop

    But you still can have them be part of the American Armed Forces. I mean, I don't care about jingoism, but I do like to see them depicted as they were in the comic: as an American Special Forces Team even more elite than Delta Force or SEAL Team 6. <p> And maybe have them meet a new October Guard. That would be cool!

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 7:52 p.m. CST


    by Rufferto

    because you brought Resolute to my attention, I found a blog post by Ellis and it sounded like he almost did thumb his nose. Funny how he admitted not having any love or knowledge of the property, yet this hour long micro series looks fantastic and more "loyal" then what Hollywood can come up with. Cause you just know all these hack Directors are just huge "Fans" of everything they adapt.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 7:56 p.m. CST

    Eh, it's not that bad...

    by menstrual_blitz

    wish there was more color though. I hope STAR TREK makes using color cool again.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 8:15 p.m. CST

    Ugh they ripped off Batman's suit

    by indysbastardson

    Where's the individuality?? Everyone looks the same. The added coolness factor of the original GI Joe cartoon/toys was the range in their outfits. Everything I've heard about this movie blows ass

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 8:29 p.m. CST

    Where's the Red, White, & Blue?

    by Joey_Redballs

    This is </b>NOT</b> G.I. JOE!!!

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 9:45 p.m. CST

    Where The Fuck-

    by laraz

    Is King Cobra!

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 9:45 p.m. CST

    Cartoon uniforms were not bizarre and cartoonish

    by bah

    Except for Bazooka with his football jersey, and Chuckles, the undercover guy who looked like David Coulier in a Hawaiian shirt. They wore a variety of outfits, but all drab military colors.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 9:47 p.m. CST

    No, the best was Shipwreck's mindfuck

    by bah

    When Cobra made him think he'd lost his memory and he had captured Cobra Commander and was married to the mermaid chick, then all the other Joes started melting. LOL @ Roadblock coming out of the carwash: "Sure was toasty in there!" Blorp!

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 9:52 p.m. CST

    I thought the UN angle was stupid just cause

    by blindambition238

    it seemed like they thought people outside of the US would be so enraged and disgusted by a stephen sommer's action movie. <p> Its not like politics would be a relevant topic with this movie one way or another.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 9:56 p.m. CST

    G.I. JOKE!!!!!

    by BringingSexyBack

    I like the leather-covered tits however. I mean, that is one sweet shot.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 10:16 p.m. CST


    by darthschneider67

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 10:36 p.m. CST

    The real moviesites...

    by Carl XVI Gustaf

    ...have 6 Action Force posters. Fuck yeah, Action Force!

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 10:37 p.m. CST

    the reason they aren't a us based unit is because

    by ironic_name

    people don't want a bunch of homosexual initiation loving, credit for WW2 taking, torturing for fun cuntflaps to be the main attraction.

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 11:29 p.m. CST

    Flex of the Sphincter

    by HyphenatedWords

    I'll go see this. Of course I will. <br> <br> But that doesn't stop my sphincter from pinching closed. Tighter, tighter, wriggling away from this horrible cock that just seems to get bigger and uglier the closer it comes, and no matter how hard I constrict, it's going to fuck me in the ass. This big ugly cock of a movie is going to rip me open and rape my childhood. <br> <br> But of course I'll go see it. Can I call it rape if I lay my money down? That makes me the whore who was askin' for it. <br> <br> I agree completely with other posters. THIS looks amazing:<br> fewn

  • Jan. 27, 2009, 11:58 p.m. CST


    by Zach_Talks_Back

    Do movies based on comics or cartoons feel they have to strip all the color out of the outfits or costumes? MAKE IT BLACK. That's the answer every time.

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 12:39 a.m. CST

    anyone know when they'll release the poster

    by vaudeville villain

    that doesn't suck llama cock?

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 1:13 a.m. CST

    Why the hell is Joseph Gordon-Levitt in this?

    by 1922

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 1:16 a.m. CST

    What the hell is Joseph Gordon-Levitt doing in this?

    by 1922

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 1:23 a.m. CST

    Why is Joseph Gordon-Levitt in this?

    by 1922

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 1:25 a.m. CST


    by Charlie_Allnut

    These costumes make no sense. They don't line up w/ the show at all, they don't look cool, and they are very unrealistic. GI Joe is supposed to be a tactical counter terrorism team...I am in the military on a tactical team and what they are wearing makes no sense at all. This movie should be an easy hole in one... Super badass Spec Ops team. Crazy sci fi ish terrorist org. It writes itself almost. And Duke is too young, he should be mid 30's. He's supposed to be an E-8 experienced operator who runs the whole team. i.e. not 27 years old. sigh.

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 1:40 a.m. CST

    2 very funny things: this talkback and this movie

    by RandySavage

    This is one of funniest talkbacks ever! I can't top the comments so won't try. This movies is going to be so bad it may well go full circle and be hilarious and worth $9.

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 2:59 a.m. CST


    by Ray Gamma

    BECAUSE I DON'T THINK ANYONE HAS MADE SUCH HONEST AND PERTINENT REMARKS ON THIS FORUM IN THE PAST FEW WEEKS: </P> <P>QUOTE: "Because Avatar is actually an ORIGINAL FUCKING IDEA!!! It's not based on a toy, a comic book, a novel or a tv show and is not a remake, reimagining, refitting of or sequel to another movie. Unfortunately, this will still make a truck load of money at the cinema, because it will be on multiple screens in every multiplex and have a nice fat summer weekend all to itself. The idiots who run the show will see a big long number in the "profit" column for this film and immediately make a sequel, so that'll be another $100 million taken out of the hands of intelligent, creative filmmakers and into the hands of an obnoxious hack to churn out more shit we've seen before. Not that I am against adaptations as a whole, as we all know there have been plenty of very good ones (No Country, There Will Be Blood and Jesse James were all adaptations of books and let's not forget TDK!). However, let's not kid ourselves that a film based on a toy from the director of the Mummy films is going to be anything special. To anyone who says something like "But it'll be a fun film!", yes it will, but if your standards were set a bit higher then Hollywood would have no choice but to raise its standards in response. Even ignoring other worthy causes outside of the cinema (let's face it, there are simply too many), $100 million could be spent on a work of cinematic art that would stand the test of time for decades, maybe even centuries. Instead $100 million will be spent on a forgettable piece of shit, because people are happy to have shit forced down their throat. Sorry to rant, but sometimes these things need to be said"

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 3:50 a.m. CST

    Baroness doing the laundry, washing the car

    by Dingbatty

    going to the optometrist cosplay:

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 3:51 a.m. CST

    I hope this shit is rated R.

    by Motoko Kusanagi

    I'm just not into teenie PG-13 bullshit.

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 3:53 a.m. CST

    Btw, those sparks look like the DIE HARD 4.0 poster.

    by Motoko Kusanagi


  • Jan. 28, 2009, 4:31 a.m. CST

    Cinema Characters that look good in Black

    by Stalkeye

    1.Blade<p>2.Neo<p>3.Pinhead (from the Hellraiser Movies)<p>4.Batman<p>and of course....<p>5.Darth-Fucking-Vader!<p>Suck it Sommers!

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 4:43 a.m. CST

    Sienna Miller's message to disapointed fanboys:

    by Stalkeye

    "Kiss my Black ass"!<p><p>:P

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 4:51 a.m. CST

    Sienna Miller's Message To My Penis

    by LaserPants

    (Sorry, her mouth is full now, she'll let you know later.)

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 5:05 a.m. CST

    This needs Megan Fox, her pink zone and NC-17.

    by Motoko Kusanagi

    That is all.

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 7:36 a.m. CST


    by most excellent ninja

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 7:38 a.m. CST

    Ray Gamma

    by Mr. Zeddemore

    Yeah, like an original piece is automatically better than an adaptation.

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 7:49 a.m. CST

    Will Smith as G.I. Joe

    by PTSDPete

    " Aw, hell JOE ! "

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 8:02 a.m. CST


    by Mr. Zeddemore

    Did you just mock one of the Bad Boys for lifes?

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 8:03 a.m. CST


    by Mr. Zeddemore


  • Jan. 28, 2009, 8:04 a.m. CST


    by Mr. Zeddemore

    Martin Lawrence will be ringing your doorbell any second. Ignore the racial slurs, he's harmless.

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 8:05 a.m. CST

    And by ringing your doorbell

    by Mr. Zeddemore

    I mean asking for a bottle of water. Don't give him any.

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 8:08 a.m. CST

    Sucks, x5

    by Abominable Snowcone

    Valid points raised above. To newcomers, you wouldn't know which of these characters is on whose side but for the goofy little eagle and snake logos at the bottom. Because they're all wearing stuff from Baroness' closet

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 8:10 a.m. CST

    Sucks x5?

    by Mr. Zeddemore

    Wow, that's a lotta suck

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 8:13 a.m. CST


    by cornponious

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 8:18 a.m. CST


    by Ghostball


  • Jan. 28, 2009, 8:21 a.m. CST

    a TRUE super elite military fighting force...

    by Abominable Snowcone

    ...that embodies the highest skill, most technological weapons, and the spirit of american perserverance...THIS is the movie poster for THAT movie...deeds not words, bitches!<p>

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 8:22 a.m. CST

    The posters wouldn't be that bad

    by Abominable Snowcone

    if they were adverts for a softcore porn about a military strike force where everyone like, DOES each other

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 8:35 a.m. CST

    You mean, like,....

    by Motoko Kusanagi

    G.I. Joe versus Cum Squad?

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 8:49 a.m. CST

    Shia LaBeouf as G.I. Joe

    by vaudeville villain

    "Joe, Joe, Joe, Joe, Joe, Joe, Joe, Joe, JOE!!"

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 8:54 a.m. CST

    How are they supposed to...

    by Ghostball

    defeat Cobtra in those outfits anyway? Make 'em cringe to death?

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 9:14 a.m. CST

    JG Levitt

    by Orbots Commander

    What's he doing in GIJOE? I believe it's called, "cashing a big check". I wouldn't doubt he has a house in mind, and this flick probably pays for it. Besides, all the super good reviews coming in for 500 DAYS OF SUMMER, which is also coming out during the Summer season, indicates he'll be washing away the smell of a paycheck movie with a good flick. I wouldn't be surprised if SUMMER is a huge hit for him as well. It could be another When Harry Met Sally.

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 9:17 a.m. CST

    Ray Gamma

    by yiannis

    Many thanks for the quoting.<br><br>I get the impression that not too many of these talkbackers are actually going to watch this nonsense, so the words have fallen on mostly receptive ears, but it's always nice to have someone agree with you

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 9:29 a.m. CST

    Aww, these posters suck...

    by Organs

    I don't mind Flint wearing the Batman armor, but Lady Jane lost her brazen redheaded appeal, Baronness lost her dominant mistress appeal, and I never knew Snake Eyes to be topless. <br><br> I mean, yeah, it wasn't a great cartoon and I'm not expecting much, but they could've at least looked the part...

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 9:35 a.m. CST

    Shia in GI Joe reminds of:

    by Mr. Zeddemore

    Moe: That is the stupidest name I ever heard. <br> Man cries. Runs out of Moe's Tarvern. </br> <br> Barney: JOEY JOE JOE?

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 9:37 a.m. CST

    Mr Zeddemore

    by yiannis

    Whoever said that an original piece is "automatically" better than an adaptation? Don't read into the words meanings that aren't there, especially when they're my words being quoted by somebody else!<br><br>Please note the four films quoted. Possibly the four best films released in the last few years and ALL adaptations of one kind or another. Ask anyone to compile their personal top ten and half - if not more - would be adaptations.<br><br>However, there HAS to be a line drawn somewhere. Adapting a novel full of richly drawn characters and suspenseful plot twists is one thing. Adapting a line of children's toys into a summer action movie is something totally different. It's not like there was a well defined and compelling story within the GI Joe universe that needed telling. It's just using the name (but not even the look!) of GI Joe to sell a bunch of tickets to people who will watch it JUST BECAUSE IT'S GI JOE, therefore putting more money into the coffers of people who are already rich beyond measure.<br><br>In the meantime, Terry Gilliam's adaptation of Don Quixote - one of the greatest novels of all time - falls apart because he can't get any money. Why? Because it's being spent on crap like this.

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 9:44 a.m. CST


    by brandon11

    For the sake of argument Let's pretend these costumes are cool. Ok maybe. But they aren't gi joe worthy. Get creative. Show some color. Iron man did it so can you.

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 9:50 a.m. CST


    by Mr. Zeddemore

    Yes, because crap like this sells. <p> Adaptations... originals... it is irrelevent. If people want Don Quixote to be made, they have to let the studios know that they would watch it in bulk. But the honest truth is that a film like that - regardless of quality - would hit a roadblock at $10 domestic. </p> <p> I'm paraphrasing William Goldman here, but he raised the good point that independant films can be made by anyone... just don't throw in a car chase and action scenes because no-one will give you that kind of money.

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 9:51 a.m. CST

    Yiannis, I don't buy your premise.

    by Orbots Commander

    Making an adaptation of an admittedly crummy toy line is not the first thing I'd stand in line to see, but that's no excuse for a director or studio not to put in effort and make a GOOD movie. Want the biggest example? I give you the first PIRATES OF THE CARRIBEAN. The public had zero expectation for a movie based on a friggin' theme park ride. And yet, between the script, the brisk direction and Depp's iconic performance as Jack Sparrow, the public went back to see it again and again, recommending it to friends and family. It sucks that Gilliam can't get Quixote made; but that's the business he chose to be in. The market will rule out and determine the subjects of movies. But it's incumbent on people like Gilliam to make an entertaining but GOOD movie, no matter the source material.

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 10:12 a.m. CST

    Sounds of the climactic final battle

    by Abominable Snowcone

    Be-yew! Be-yew! Buh-beyew! Be-yew! Be-yew!

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 10:29 a.m. CST

    a TRUE super elite military fighting force...

    by ironic_name


  • Jan. 28, 2009, 10:51 a.m. CST

    I'm surprised nobody has mentioned G.I. Jane yet....

    by Motoko Kusanagi

    But then again, hopefully nobody watched that crap.

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 10:52 a.m. CST

    Btw, what is it with Harry's new gif animation?

    by Motoko Kusanagi

    Is it AVATAR, fucking his eyeball?

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 11:53 a.m. CST


    by Abominable Snowcone

    I'm guessing it's because of the new Friday the 13th, comes out next month

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 12:06 p.m. CST

    Harry's gif would be Valentines Day 3-D

    by S-Mart shopper

    or bloody valentine which ever it was he has geek love for

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 12:06 p.m. CST

    looks better than AVATAR.


  • Jan. 28, 2009, 1:12 p.m. CST

    What's all this "Avatar" talk Danny?

    by Stuntcock Mike

    I've never heard of the fucking thing. Sounds shit.

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 1:24 p.m. CST

    Orbots Commander

    by the_shogun_gunslinger

    ah, I didn't know they had changed the team to an international hybrid...which is just insulting, but so are the costumes, casting and director so its no surprise to hear that. Thanks for clearing it up. <P> Too bad man. GI Joe could have beena really cool an fun movie instead of some generic money grab. Expect lots of military mumbojumbo talk between on men in a pathetic attempt to dramatize everything. Also, i keep hearing TDK score in my head when I look at these posters... must be the gray backgrounds and embers.

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 1:33 p.m. CST


    by the_shogun_gunslinger

    yeah i know of the 92F being used but I was refering to the rifles. I'm certainly not beating my chest saying the US military SHOULD use some wacky "Made in USA" gun. I couldn't care less either way. Shit, I'll be the first to tell you the M16 is one of the cheapest and most problematic rifles ever, I'm just saying that the lack of detail is astonishing. But thanks for addressing the problem. And yeah, the US should switch to H&K.

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 1:53 p.m. CST

    3rd poster looks like....

    by brandon11

    what black widow should look like in avengers

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 2:07 p.m. CST


    by noncents

    It works.

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 4:43 p.m. CST


    by turketron

    more like COBRA LOLOLOLOL<p><p>

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 4:46 p.m. CST


    by turketron

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 4:56 p.m. CST


    by cabsau

    Bomb, Dud, Failure, Flop, Stinker

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 5:43 p.m. CST

    I'll be amazed if this is any good.

    by uberfreak

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 6:40 p.m. CST

    I had hopes for this TB

    by S-Mart shopper

    thought maybe it would reach Transformer TB like proportions...oh well, like Johnny said "Flame On!"

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 9:33 p.m. CST

    Mr Zeddemore and Orbots Commander

    by yiannis

    Mr Zeddemore<br><br>You raise the most valid of all points, that crap like this sells. This is as much (if not more) an indictment of the movie-going public as it is of the moviemakers themselves. Unfortunately we all know that there's nothing the humble geek with a brain can really do about this, so our only recourse is the anonymous bitching of a talkback.<br><br>Orbots Commander<br><br>POTC is, of course, the exception that proves the rule and a wonderful film. However, can you HONESTLY look me in the eyes (metaphorically, of course) and say that you expect the same kind of experience out of THIS movie?<br><br>Gore Verbinski had never made a major summer film prior to POTC, making his name with smaller, more character based films, so it was really his first chance to show what he was capable of. Johnny Depp, meanwhile, had always been a quality character actor who was finally given a major, high profile role and siezed it with both hands.<br><br>Stephen Sommers, on the other hand, has made several summer action movies in his career, all with broadly the same qualities (decent-ish FX, some nice set pieces, light, vaguely comedic touch) and problems (one-note characters, almost caricatures, plots that are both basic and unnecessarily convoluted, little or no genuine emotional investment), and I have yet to see a reason to expect anything except more of the same. As far as the cast goes, there is no name there that really leaps out as being able to make a Depp-in-POTC type impact, nor really a part in which such impact could be made.<br><br>I would also argue that POTC was utterly unique in the adaptation stakes, as it is basically an adaptation of a NAME. Let's face it, there are no characters in the ride, nor is there any story, just a series of comedic vignettes detailing pirate life. Therefore the filmmakers had almost total freedom to make up any story they wanted, based on hundreds of years of pirate folklore. The fact that a supernatural element was then added further increased their storytelling possibilities.<br><br>GI Joe, on the other hand, has a number of serious limitations to an adaptation. First of all, the premise is pretty much set in stone (special force of military types battle evil criminal mastermind with his own henchmen) and is severely limiting in terms of what can be done. Let's face it, you know the bad guy will hatch a diabolical plan, get almost to the brink of victory then the good guys will win, while the bad guy himself survives for another adventure next time. It's as basic as storytelling can get!<br><br>Secondly, the filmmakers are stuck with a series of recognisable characters they have to use or else it's not GI Joe and, let's face it, we're not talking about richly drawn and deep bits of characterisation here, we're talking about TOYS. Little plastic men with their entire backstory - and in fact entire character - contained in one small paragraph on the back of the original packaging. They are at best archetypes and at worst utterly one-dimensional cardboard cut-outs.<br><br>The difference is nobody knew what to expect from POTC, which is why everyone (myself included) was so pleasantly surprised. This, on the other hand, we know EXACTLY what to expect. Big explosions, sexy ladies and cackling villans. All well and good, but the problem is we've seen it all before, literally hundreds of times. A movie like POTC raises the bar. This sort of movie refuses to even acknowledge that there IS a bar and doesn't even try to jump. It merely strolls merrily under it.

  • Jan. 28, 2009, 10:05 p.m. CST

    I see your line of reasoning, but still disagree.

    by Orbots Commander

    The source material for GIJOE is pop culture junk: a Hasbro toy line and poorly animated cartoon. Agreed. Where I disagree is that I think Sommers is/was as free to riff on this property as Verbinski was with POTC. There aren't any dedicated fans, serious minded ones anyway, who'd object to the filmmakers diverging from JOE 'canon' (LOL!!!) and creating a totally new storyline with unique characters. Due to the source material, Sommers could have made a gee-whiz entertaining Raiders-like modern day swashbuckler, just as fun PIRATES. Of course, I'm guessing the final result is ass, as evidenced with the casting (Marlon Wayans???). The only hope for any kind of screen presence or for an actual performance is likely to come from the kid...Levitt as Cobra Commander. The guy's talented and he'll likely be a huge Tom Hanks-like movie star someday.

  • Jan. 29, 2009, 12:58 a.m. CST

    I just hope they nail Snake-Eyes!!!!

    by sonnyfern

    He's one of my favorite characters in anything ANYWHERE. They better give him a ruined face...destroyed vocal chords...and make him the BADASS THAT HE IS.

  • Jan. 29, 2009, 2:40 a.m. CST

    The source material is the Marvel

    by Dingbatty

    comic book written by Larry Hama, who did a bang up job considering Hasbro screwed his original engaging tales later by flooding the line with too many, and too ridiculous characters.

  • Jan. 29, 2009, 3:34 a.m. CST

    "Poorly animated"?

    by Stalkeye

    If you are refering to the 2nd season of the animated series, you're dead on. (The shitty 1990 DIC series does not count.)However the Miniseries and even the Movie had good to decent animation which was handled by Japanese know, the guys that were responsible for Mighty Orbots. :P

  • Jan. 29, 2009, 5:08 a.m. CST


    by yiannis

    I know this might sound weird, but I disagree with you when you say that you disagree with me! You recognise that the licence is "junk" and certainly have low expectations for this film. Your one positive comment seems to be that it MIGHT be good.<br><br>Well, that's my whole point! The entire choice of GI sodding Joe as your starting point for a $100 million movie can only EVER be dictated by financial reasons. There was no story that needed to be told, no captivating and complex characters waiting to be explored. It is simply a case of the studio hoping that brand recognition will give them that all important opening weekend, make some profit and lead to that money-making francise. It's only saving grace is that somehow the filmmakers MIGHT make a good movie from all of this, but we both seem to agree that's a long shot.

  • Jan. 29, 2009, 8:44 a.m. CST

    Choice of actors and actresses

    by kendragon

    Is it just me or do the choices of actors and actresses suck. especially Sienna 'plain as f**k' Miller as the baroness... poor choice IMO

  • Jan. 29, 2009, 9:52 a.m. CST

    Honestly was POTC less of a cash grab than this?

    by terry1978

    You know Disney was praying for that shit to hit big, and when it did, they made sure to milk it with merchandising on par with their original Disney characters.

  • Jan. 29, 2009, 10:43 a.m. CST


    by Orbots Commander

    No, I did not know that. Very interesting about the animation company. Anyway, my sig is just a tip of the hat, tongue-firmly-in-cheek nostalgia for something from my childhood TV watching. It doesn't mean I'm breathlessly waiting for an adaptation of Mighty Orbots. In fact, I'd dread it. It would make a terrible movie. The premise was just as junky as anything else from Saturday Morning. Though I did enjoy those mornings around the TV with a giant bowl of Lucky Charms or Fruit Loops, waiting for Thundarr the Barbarian or Spider-man and His Amazing Friends to come on.

  • Jan. 29, 2009, 6:18 p.m. CST

    These posters are useless.

    by chrismata

    This I command!

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