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Sundance 2009: Maluquiro Gets A Load Of BLACK DYNAMITE!

Beaks here...

BLACK DYNAMITE, the retro blacksploitation homage/parody from Scott Sanders and Michael Jai White, had its first screening at Sundance last night. Several hours later, Sony Pictures closed a $2 million deal to distribute the film. Was it worth it? AICN reader Maluquiro seems to think so. (Beware of joke spoilers.)

Hey Harry, Quint and gang, I post in the talkbacks as maluquiro. I was lucky enough to get to go to the midnight screening of the faux-blaxploitation film "Black Dynamite." I'm not really sure of the review protocol on the site. Should I starting out all the food i ate before and during the screening? Or should I talk about the movie? I think I'll talk about the movie. If you've seen the trailer to "Black Dynamite" then you know exactly what you're getting before you see the movie. I mean that in the best possible way. This is one of those rare movies that actually lives up to the promise of the trailer. Black Dynamite (the man) is a bad mother- (shut your mouth) who is tired of crack being sold to orphans in his town. He's tough enough to punch a guy through a wall, but sensitive enough to adopt a group of pimpless hookers. He also has a pair of nunchucks. I don't want to get too specific about the action, because most of the gags work so well because they are a surprise. The action is very over-the-top, but I never felt like it went into the "Crank" realm of "look-how-crazy-and-over-the-top-we-are!" That's where the film's real success lies. Remember how Robert Rodriguez and Quentin Tarantino spent millions of dollars trying to recreate the feel of the old exploitation movies they loved so much? "Black Dynamite" is, in a lot of ways, what "Grindhouse" could have been. This movie feels like a cheap old seventies movie that was shot in the seventies, sat on a shelf, and then was recut by some jerk who found the footage in a warehouse. The film, for the most part, feels like it was made in the seventies. The costumes and locations feel like they came from a time when vintage was new, which is remarkable for such a low budget film. Even the faces of the actors feel period. This commitment to period detail extends to the actual production values. This movie feels like it was made by the most hilariously inept filmmakers of the seventies. Actors read the stage direction off of cue cards. Sometimes at the end of a scene you can almost hear the director yell cut because the actor goes out of character and looks at the camera. In a shout out to Rudy Ray Moore the boom mike falls into frame as B.D. is giving a dramatic speech. You even hear it hit his afro. It's breaking the fourth wall disguised as incompetence. The danger of a movie like this is that that the joke can get old very quickly. The movie starts out at a quick place, and never really slows down. The jokes are fast enough and inventive enough that movie keeps your interest. Another danger in movies like this that the beginning is so over top that you're bored by the end. The climax to "Black Dynamite" is not disappointing, it actually manages to bring together and top all the crazy stuff that went before it. It kind of addresses the question of why Superman or Captain America never decided to just kill Hitler instead of fighting Nazis, except instead of Berlin B.D. takes the fight to Washington D.C. Black Dynamite takes it all the way to the top. To be honest, there was one missed opportunity. One of the hookers reassures B.D. that they can take care of themselves because they've been training their kung-fu. I'm sorry to say that there is no hooker kung-fu battle in the movie. Black Dynamite does go to Kung-Fu Island though. Thanks! Maluquiro


Kung-Fu Island is supposed to be beautiful this time of year. Most of the reactions I've heard coming out of last night's screening echo Maluquiro's. Let's hope this isn't a Sundance triumph that loses something (or everything) once it screens outside of Park City. (Not for nothing, but that line about the hookers being able to take care of themselves w/ kung-fu is straight out of DOLEMITE. I hope this movie will work for those of us who're exceedingly familiar with Rudy Ray Moore's oeuvre.)

Readers Talkback
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  • Jan. 19, 2009, 3:36 p.m. CST

    Can't wait for this one.

    by Stuntcock Mike

    "Your gonna wake up the other bitches"

  • Jan. 19, 2009, 3:38 p.m. CST

    you jive mother...

    by hirst

    fuckeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • Jan. 19, 2009, 3:39 p.m. CST

    CANNOT WAIT! Been waiting to read a review

    by most excellent ninja

    fuck I want to see this movie. But i'll be quiet so I don't wake the rest of the bitches.

  • Jan. 19, 2009, 3:40 p.m. CST

    They should of waited. they would of gotten more

    by most excellent ninja

    no doubt a bigger distribution deal, the trailer alone has excited people. and the movie apparently lives up to it's promise from people who have seen it. Should have waited you jive motherfuckers.

  • Jan. 19, 2009, 3:45 p.m. CST

    sheeeet

    by disfigurehead

    I can't wait to see this.

  • Jan. 19, 2009, 3:46 p.m. CST

    You're right ninja

    by palpatinefuckedmydog

    They should "have" waited. They would "have" gotten more :)

  • Jan. 19, 2009, 3:46 p.m. CST

    adult film star 'charlotte'

    by zom-bot.com

    ..plays one of the many 'bitches in the bed.' sad that i know that, but oh well. good to see her branching out into some real movies where she only pretends to take it from a guy.

  • Jan. 19, 2009, 3:53 p.m. CST

    come palpatine get wid it

    by crazybubba

    you only use ebonics in black dynamite talk back. take the grammer and speling police crap over to the script girl tb

  • Jan. 19, 2009, 3:58 p.m. CST

    My bad

    by palpatinefuckedmydog

  • Jan. 19, 2009, 4 p.m. CST

    I blew my load watching the trailer for this months ago...

    by turketron

    My balls are still recovering... hopefully they will be re-energized by the time this hits theaters.

  • Jan. 19, 2009, 4:01 p.m. CST

    rejuvinutted

    by turketron

    you jive motherfuckers

  • Jan. 19, 2009, 4:01 p.m. CST

    We got Black Dynamite t-shirts at BNAT

    by Garbageman33

    It's pretty awesome. Unfortunately, mine is Harry Knowles sized and could clothe a family of 5.

  • Jan. 19, 2009, 4:04 p.m. CST

    shouldn't that be

    by palpatinefuckedmydog

    Jive muhfuckahs :)

  • Jan. 19, 2009, 4:05 p.m. CST

    Does it have a Distributor, & will it go Silverscreen?

    by ThePilgrim

    I had to fight with hitfix'es trailer server applet to see this trailer after I clicked on it.... I get it! Paramount might be an angel investor and that means they get some love for that. At anyrate I saw and loved the hell outta Black Dynamite. Michael Jai White hasn't had a role this good, ever! Last big film he lead was Spawn, and the last picture I remember him playing a notable role was in TDK as Gamble. I want to see this in the cinema not on DVD or BR. This is a film built for a sit in audiance. Please someone buy it up and silverscreen it!

  • Jan. 19, 2009, 4:06 p.m. CST

    Shit.... Missed the sony bought it part.

    by ThePilgrim

    SILVERSCREEN IT!!! Don't cut it up either!

  • Jan. 19, 2009, 4:08 p.m. CST

    palpatinefuckedmydog

    by most excellent ninja

    you do realize i may be in a country where what i wrote may be normal and not incorrect.

  • Jan. 19, 2009, 4:08 p.m. CST

    Michael Jai white

    by palpatinefuckedmydog

    should be perfect for Luke Cage. SWEET CHRISTMAS!!!!!

  • Jan. 19, 2009, 4:09 p.m. CST

    true dat ninja

    by palpatinefuckedmydog

  • Jan. 19, 2009, 5:11 p.m. CST

    ATTENTION MALUQUIRO!!!!!!!!

    by The Real McClane

    Dude, that was a damn fine review. You better get your ass to the movies more often and keep sending in those, brother. This movie looks like it's going to turn my brains into banana pudding. Amazing.

  • Jan. 19, 2009, 5:16 p.m. CST

    I used "jive muthafuckAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH" in public.

    by Jackie Boy

    They didn't get the joke.

  • Jan. 19, 2009, 5:32 p.m. CST

    most excellent ninja

    by BadMrWonka

    "They should of waited. they would of gotten more"<p>I just died inside TWICE as you wrote that. you should HAVE paid attention in 5th grade grammar brother...

  • Jan. 19, 2009, 5:40 p.m. CST

    I get off in ten minutes

    by Mr. Zeddemore

    You right about that, sugar. You right about that.

  • Jan. 19, 2009, 6:42 p.m. CST

    Sounds like "Black Mantis" from the SXSW

    by krullboyisback

    grindhouse trailer competition. . . check it out on Youtube, it is pretty funny.

  • Jan. 19, 2009, 7:09 p.m. CST

    I hope this does well

    by McBane

    Michael Jai White deserves to be a HUGE star. He is a very underrated actor. He was practically the only good thing about Spawn. I would say he is even a better actor than Snipes. His comic timing seems realy good in the trailer. Lets hope he becomes the huge, bankable action star he reserves to be. I am still pissed that his character S. E. T. H. went out like a punk in Universal Soldier 2 so Van Damme could face off against Goldberg. <shudder>

  • Jan. 19, 2009, 7:18 p.m. CST

    the trailer was the best thing i've seen all year

    by drturing

    and fuck Grindhouse, fuck that shit. i finally saw planet terror and how the fuck someone could abort $40 million dollars on a made for sci fi channel movie is beyond me.

  • Jan. 19, 2009, 7:32 p.m. CST

    yo blood.. lend me the DVD..

    by nolan bautista

    No my brother..you gots to get your own

  • Jan. 19, 2009, 7:47 p.m. CST

    It does sound like Black Mantis...

    by blackmantis

    So says I, he who made it.

  • Jan. 19, 2009, 8:06 p.m. CST

    This made me laugh

    by ChocolateJesus

    "I'm not really sure of the review protocol on the site. Should I starting out all the food i ate before and during the screening? Or should I talk about the movie? I think I'll talk about the movie." Good review. This movie seems like it'll be great.

  • Jan. 19, 2009, 8:19 p.m. CST

    But Black Dynamite I sell drugs in the community

    by ZoeFan

    My favorite line in the trailer.

  • Jan. 19, 2009, 8:24 p.m. CST

    Rudy Ray did the voiceover for the trailer

    by Dark Knight Lite

    I hope they were able to get a little of the voiceover into the finished film. I'm looking forward to this one, BITCH.

  • Jan. 19, 2009, 9:08 p.m. CST

    BlackMantis, great work, but who was Chastity

    by krullboyisback

    Snow in your trailer? If she is your GF you are a lucky SOB!!!

  • Jan. 19, 2009, 9:14 p.m. CST

    Great review

    by Darth Thoth

    I cannot wait for this flick!

  • Jan. 19, 2009, 9:27 p.m. CST

    can't wait for this mutha!

    by ironic_name

  • Jan. 19, 2009, 9:49 p.m. CST

    Captain Muthafuckin' Kangaroo!

    by otm shank

    I'm in. Can't wait.

  • Jan. 19, 2009, 11:14 p.m. CST

    BadMrWonka

    by most excellent ninja

    did you read what i wrote after it? I'm in a country where speaking/writing like that is not incorrect. Are you from the US? if so it makes sense, apparently you cunts invented English. Watch me give you shit when you say airplane, and farther.

  • Jan. 20, 2009, 12:39 a.m. CST

    So He Kicks The President's Ass???

    by Media Messiah

    Black Dynamite against Nixon in a Kung-fu battle within the White House??? Sounds great to me!!!

  • Jan. 20, 2009, 2:44 a.m. CST

    most excellent ninja

    by BadMrWonka

    please don't tell me that you think "should of" is correct on either side of the pond. it has nothing to do with British vs. American English, it's just plain wrong. <p>hey, I let you get away with using "it's" for a possessive instead of "its"...<p>why didn't you at least google it to see if you were completely wrong before you responded? you really "should'f" done that...

  • Jan. 20, 2009, 3:29 a.m. CST

    The Real McClane, ChocolateJesus,Darth Thoth

    by maluquiro

  • Jan. 20, 2009, 3:29 a.m. CST

    The Real McClane, ChocolateJesus, Darth Thoth

    by maluquiro

    thanks! hopefully i'll have another review up soon.

  • Jan. 20, 2009, 3:30 a.m. CST

    media messiah

    by maluquiro

    yes, and there are nun chucks involved.

  • Jan. 20, 2009, 3:31 a.m. CST

    grammar?

    by maluquiro

    is this really the right talkback to argue about grammar?

  • Jan. 20, 2009, 3:40 a.m. CST

    NICOLE SULLIVAN IS IN THIS?!

    by James Westfall

    Fucking WIN!!

  • Jan. 20, 2009, 3:54 a.m. CST

    BadMrWonka

    by most excellent ninja

    there is more english based countries than the uk and Us, americans are a bit self absorbed aren't they?

  • Jan. 20, 2009, 3:55 a.m. CST

    that was incorrect too on purpose

    by most excellent ninja

    you fcuk.

  • Jan. 20, 2009, 4:17 a.m. CST

    Miss Stokely...

    by workshed

    ...let's hope she makes the transition to 'movie star' though I'm quite happy for her to make the occasional side-project..! She's like Anne Hathaway's evil twin..! What a gal.

  • Jan. 20, 2009, 5:12 a.m. CST

    most excellent ninja

    by The Dark Shite

    There isn't a single English speaking country in the world where "should of" is correct. Not one. I've seen it used a lot. Usually by window lickers.

  • Jan. 20, 2009, 7:09 a.m. CST

    aluquiro

    by Media Messiah

  • Jan. 20, 2009, 7:16 a.m. CST

    Maluquiro: I'll Be There In The Front Row

    by Media Messiah

    This movie should be a real ball. I always guessed that Richard Nixon knew Kung-Fu...and hopefully they'll give us a climatic battle scene in a mirror room ala Enter The Dragon...between Nixon and Dynamite, happening somewhere behind a trapdoor in the Lincoln bedroom.

  • Jan. 20, 2009, 8:32 a.m. CST

    Best trailer of 2008 NO DOUBT!

    by Darth_Kaos

    I can't wait to see this movie, and I will get me a BD T-shirt.<br><br> I'm still cracking up that Captain Kangaroo as a cameo! This will be an instant classic, and it's good to hear that the movie lives up to the trailer.

  • Jan. 20, 2009, 9:16 a.m. CST

    KUNG FU ISLAND!!!!!

    by ironic_name

  • Jan. 20, 2009, 12:22 p.m. CST

    Kung Fu Island

    by InActionMan

    is only a short boat ride from MILF Island.

  • Jan. 20, 2009, 5:59 p.m. CST

    Personally I have always thought that...

    by wacko3205

    Michael Jiz-ai to the Whiz-ite was on of the more unappreciated & dynamic actors out there of the action genre. He was great in the tiny bit of Kill Bill 2 that was for some ridiculous reason cut from the film...as hated as Spawn was...he was great in that too. Dug the shiz outta him in Universal Soldier 2 & also the Dark Knight...maybe this'll put him back onto the map!!! Can't wait.

  • March 19, 2011, 1:49 p.m. CST

    BLACK DYNAMITE GRAPHIC NOVEL!

    by grandwiz

    http://www.comicbookresources.com/?page=preview&id=8072&disp=table