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NINJA ASSASSIN looks like it'll be ninja action by the tons!

Hey folks, Harry here - a Facebook friend named David had the following up on his Facebook page from YouTube and I'll be damned if I've seen it before. It's basically 5+ minutes of Training and Stunt Choreography for the next Wachowski produced James McTeague flick called NINJA ASSASSIN... which sounds like a movie I'd want to see. I've yet to figure out why I should hate Rain yet, other than when he beat Colbert in a dance dance revolution challenge... But I'm still convinced he new the programmer and made the most badass dancer lose by default. Thus dooming Colbert. But in the below footage, I have to say... He looks real fucking good doing some really insane moves. Same as the other stunt folk. The other thing that you can take from this footage is that it looks like they were practicing for long, Bruce Lee style tracking shots of massive sword fu chopping and kung fu. Beautiful work in the training phase, unless it gets all chopped to fuck in editing. Let's hope not. Anyway - check this out. Very cool.... back to my DVD column I go...

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  • Jan. 6, 2009, 3:07 a.m. CST


    by raidahguy

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 3:08 a.m. CST

    SECOND BITCH!!!!!!

    by raidahguy

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 3:08 a.m. CST

    No thanks

    by Mr. Zeddemore

    I learned from Kung Fu Panda that an 'awesome title' doesn't usually equal an awesome film.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 3:08 a.m. CST


    by raidahguy

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 3:09 a.m. CST

    WEAK SAUCE!!!!!!!

    by raidahguy

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 3:09 a.m. CST

    Just Cast Chuck Norris...

    by raidahguy

    He will solve everything.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 3:10 a.m. CST


    by drturing


  • Jan. 6, 2009, 3:10 a.m. CST

    I've been looking forward to this for months.

    by Stengah

    Prior screen shots didn't reveal too much, but anything ninja related is fucking awesome.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 3:17 a.m. CST


    by smackfu

    ninjas are sweet

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 3:21 a.m. CST

    Sorry but that just looks objectively awesome

    by IndustryKiller!

    It's a guy looking like he's carved from wood doing bad ass stunts with samurai swords in a films THAT BEARS THE TITLE "Ninja Assassin" from the director of V For Vandetta! What the fuck exactly is there not to like? Man people can be cynical about anything.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 3:22 a.m. CST

    Facebook, facebook.

    by David Cloverfield

    Facebook... Facebook? FAAACEEEBOOOOK!

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 3:23 a.m. CST

    Wachowski + 18/R...

    by UltimaRex

    = Back to form.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 3:26 a.m. CST

    Looks tits!

    by Horace Cox

    If all the training and choreography go to waste because of rapid fire machine gun ADHD editing, a real ninja should kill the editor.<p> Also, the move that bald cat pulls around the 3:11 mark is fucking sweeeeeet! I'm off to practice it right now...

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 3:40 a.m. CST

    What the fuck?

    by milla jovovich

    have McTeague or the Wachowski Brothers ever done anything that can be described as "ADHD editing" or "chopped to fuck in editing?" No, so stuff your unwarranted, imagined fears up your yin-yang.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 3:52 a.m. CST

    This comic con panel...

    by billypilgrimisunstuck

    ...was the most HILARIOUS thing i've ever seen at a con. It was mostly 13 year old Asian girls asking asinine, contrived quesitons to Rain, and Rain appropriately responding "I like action movies. I like hero".

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 4:06 a.m. CST

    I wish my name was Rain.

    by Knuckleduster

    Chocolate Rain.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 4:21 a.m. CST

    Ninja Assassin

    by sonnyfern

    With a title like can't go wrong!

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 4:35 a.m. CST

    sliding on his knees

    by thinboyslim.

    like a 5 year old on a newly polished floor, genius!

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 4:38 a.m. CST

    It looks finifshed. Just wrap CGI walls around them.

    by kikuchiyoboy

    Then fill in the rest with Rain singing. Then change the title to Ninja Assissinger.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 4:45 a.m. CST

    Was that a Ninja!?

    by DerLanghaarige

    More like a Nonja!<br>

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 4:52 a.m. CST

    Homo Erotic Visuals

    by Media Messiah

    Do the Wachowskis do these movies just so they can be close to guys that they think are are hot? The action is a bit too much to the point of being laughable. It plays like violence dressed as porn.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 5:12 a.m. CST

    thats fuck all

    by DanboJohnJ

    You want to me me after 8 pints of stella and a kebab.....seriously though that does look cool,you can never have too many ninja films

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 5:29 a.m. CST

    Damn... looks like a whopping 150lbs of Ninja muscle.

    by The Grug

    Any performer who goes by a single name has me a little worried. But I'll wait and see how this goes.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 5:56 a.m. CST

    Looks like stupid fun.

    by Dingbatty

    But the martial arts look more like wushu than Bujinkan. But I'm splitting hairs.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 5:57 a.m. CST

    if they pull some Bourne shit on this, I'll be pissed.

    by iamnicksaicnsn

    This looks promising...

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 5:57 a.m. CST

    But fancy kung fu does not a good movie make...

    by iamnicksaicnsn

    let's hope the story's decent as well.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 6:04 a.m. CST

    Sho Kosugi muthafucka!

    by Grammaton Cleric Binks

    Anything else is just second rate.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 6:10 a.m. CST

    The Wachowski Brothers will mess it up

    by GornPirate

    They always do. It will look great but the story will be terrible.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 6:46 a.m. CST

    Glad ninja making a comeback

    by Dazzler69

    Just watched Ninja III and I do miss all the ninja movies back from the 80's. Kill Bill considered a ninja movie? Last Samurai?

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 6:55 a.m. CST


    by Knugen

    Did that guy just do a 720 flip without a trampoline?

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 7:03 a.m. CST


    by Flibbertygibbet

    I hear ya pal. Film looks like it'll be good fun, but is actual Ninjutsu so visually boring that they can't use it? Even a bit? That's a little sad.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 7:17 a.m. CST

    Two Ninja Films

    by Munro Kelly

    There's another ninja film comming soon, it's called "Ninja". Ninja is directed by Isaac Florentine (Undisputed 2) and starring Scott Adkins. It may go direct to DVD but it will definetly deliver on the action.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 7:20 a.m. CST

    I have high hopes that soon will see similar video

    by just pillow talk

    of "Samurai Monkeys" training.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 7:20 a.m. CST

    Release Date?

    by MrPopular

    Looks good.. and if w/ the Wachowski name alone i'll be in theater to see it... But whats the release date?

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 7:29 a.m. CST


    by turketron

    One of the ninja movies I saw from the 80's... one of those Sho Kosugi features where they take two completely unrelated movies, splice the scenes together, and dub over it with ridiculous dialogue that makes the scenes tie together. Great and hilarious movies to watch with friends, as are the first 3 American Ninja movies.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 7:42 a.m. CST

    Fucking Cool

    by Cobbio

    I have no idea who Rain is, but that footage was fun as hell to watch. I rewatched certain scenes of it twice.<p> James McTeigue, with a little help from the Wachowskis, did a great job directing "V for Vendetta." I'm excited to see a badass, R-rated return to ninja life in whatever era this film takes place in. Rain's training looks like it's going well so far.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 7:43 a.m. CST

    Damn shame what passes for a ninja these days.

    by Zarles

    Wow, not even one dickhead bitching about Speed Racer in this TB yet? I'm impressed.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 7:51 a.m. CST

    A little flashy for my tastes.

    by C Legion

    Give me a bit of Lee any time, whether it be Bruce or Hwang Jang.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 7:52 a.m. CST

    Needs More Car-Fu, Pop-Art Explosions, & Christina Ricci

    by LaserPants

    SPEED RACER is the most underrated movie of the year. Discuss.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 7:55 a.m. CST

    Still looks like dancing!


    what you need for the best sword fight ever is 2 of those ninja guys who can really do that and just say to them here's a million for the first to win for real! <P>Then film it!

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 8 a.m. CST

    just awesome

    by FuryofthefilmFan

    There's not enough good modern day martial arts films. This looks great.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 8:21 a.m. CST

    I always thought Rain was kind of a Streisand...

    by skycrapper

    but it looks like he's rocking the shit in this one.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 8:32 a.m. CST

    Note to modern action directors:

    by Chewtoy

    Note how the camera work in this video is *extremely* basic, the editing almost nonexistant, and yet the fights are about 1000x cooler looking than the bullshit you try to pass off with your constant close-ups and quick cuts.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 8:38 a.m. CST

    Sho Kosugi - revenge of the ninja - awesome

    by npjs55

    Sho was a master at playing a Ninja.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 8:48 a.m. CST

    Will there ever be a real ninja movie????

    by Keanu Gives

    You know, where they actually use ninjutsu the real ninja martial art. This is ridiculous. Real ninjas didn't even do back flips. The real ninja's history is hard to find because that part of history was manipulated by the samurai (they feared ninjas). Look up Masaki Hatsumi for some real/actual ninja news. Having said that, this looks fun and I can't wait.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 8:49 a.m. CST

    "chopped to fuck in editing"

    by veritasses

    Probably. And don't forget the extreme closeups, bad angles, shaky cam and poor lighting to complete the effect.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 8:57 a.m. CST


    by Flibbertygibbet

    To be fair, I reckon, back in the day, a ninja might have done the occasional back-flip. y'know, after a few beers and showing off to his ninja mates or trying to pull some hot kunoichi arse. They're only human ;)

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 9:08 a.m. CST

    "The most underrated movie of the year"...

    by Motoko Kusanagi

    No, Mr. RazorPants. SPEED RACER was simply a dumb, terrible, immature borefest par excellence. Nothing more, nothing less.<p>Oh, and an eye-melting color-palette does not equal pop art.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 9:15 a.m. CST


    by blackthought

    that is some pretty bad ass shite right there.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 9:16 a.m. CST

    as opposed to...

    by Melvin_Pelvis

    Ninja Florist?

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 9:17 a.m. CST


    by Melvin_Pelvis

    Ninja Tug Boat 1st Mate?

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 9:18 a.m. CST


    by Melvin_Pelvis

    Ninja Used Car Salesman?

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 9:19 a.m. CST


    by Melvin_Pelvis

    Ninja 411 Operator?

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 9:19 a.m. CST


    by Melvin_Pelvis

    Ninja Mushroom Harvester?

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 9:21 a.m. CST


    by Melvin_Pelvis

    Ninja Podiatrist

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 9:22 a.m. CST


    by Melvin_Pelvis

    Ninja Clothing Inspector #4

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 9:25 a.m. CST


    by Melvin_Pelvis

    Ninja Squeegy Guy Who Bothers You at That One Stop On The Way Home From Work Everyday

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 9:28 a.m. CST


    by Melvin_Pelvis

    Ninja Dog Walker /slash/ House Sitter

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 9:32 a.m. CST


    by Melvin_Pelvis

    Ninja Sewage Plant Worker

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 9:35 a.m. CST


    by Melvin_Pelvis

    Ninja Truck Stop Ho'

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 9:37 a.m. CST


    by Melvin_Pelvis

    Ninja Wildlife Photographer

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 9:38 a.m. CST

    You seem to be lonely, Melvin_Pelvis

    by Motoko Kusanagi


  • Jan. 6, 2009, 9:42 a.m. CST


    by Melvin_Pelvis

    Ninja Belly Button Lint Type'er, Collector and Archivist

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 9:45 a.m. CST

    Well, Motoko Kusanagi

    by Melvin_Pelvis

    Since a Ninja is an Assassin that title is like calling an Engineer, an Engineer Engineer<p> (don't know the Japanese word for Engineer)<p> But you know what I mean...

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 9:48 a.m. CST

    by Flibbertygibbet

    That would be my guess too, Motoko. Bless 'im. Although Ninja Wildlife Photographer almost makes sense. If you step back and squint a bit.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 9:53 a.m. CST

    To get back to the topic:

    by Motoko Kusanagi

    the stunts were really awesome. And they show perfectly how brilliant a good fight choreography looks when it's not filmed in fucking shaky cam and edited in a 4-frame-rhythm.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 10:04 a.m. CST

    by Flibbertygibbet

    It's just occurred to me that the blonde, Western fella looks like a guy I saw at the International Free-Running Championship in London a couple of months back. Those moves look very familiar. Same guy perhaps?

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 10:09 a.m. CST

    So NO ONE knows that Sho Kosugi is actually in this movie?

    by Zarles

    For shame. And you call yourselves geeks.<p><p>And yes, Speed Racer really was the most underrated movie of 2008. Pull your dicks out that Iron Man poster and deal with it.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 10:47 a.m. CST

    Speed, like all Wachowski movies post Bound

    by Frightreviews

    Is actually OVERrated, because some people say its good. Let's hope this one tanks and they are either forced to return to small budget indies (like Bound), or just give up having any involvement with movies entirely.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 10:53 a.m. CST


    by noncents

    Sorry, but spend more time developing an interesting story with deep characters and then worry about fighting sequences, because I've seen everything that can be done in action moves already.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 11:49 a.m. CST

    I saw this on youtube more than a month ago

    by m_reporter

    Looks ok guess, but theres no way of telling how it will look in the final film though.<p>Oh, and Sped Racer was shit, telling yourself that it's good over and over again wont make it truth.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 12:08 p.m. CST

    Looks Good

    by Toonol

    I love Speed Racer, though, so I'm part of a small, elite, cadre.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 12:08 p.m. CST

    I execute each of those moves

    by Abominable Snowcone

    at least once a day, and that's just on my way to work.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 12:08 p.m. CST


    by kwisatzhaderach

    I'm with you. They are the architects of abandoning story and character. I couldn't have cared less what happened to one character in The Matrix.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 12:17 p.m. CST

    Ninja Facts!

    by Darth Macchio

    Did you know that the plural form of the word Ninja is Ninja? That's right kids! Just like there is no such thing as deers, there is no such thing as ninjas! Discuss...

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 12:19 p.m. CST


    by Darth Macchio

    You know, that word looses quite a bit of its ominous context when you see that it has the word "ass" written 2x in a row followed by the word "in".<p>I mean seriously, who thought of this shit?

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 12:23 p.m. CST

    when are they gonna make a real ninja movie...?

    by joevfx

    Ninja were poor people that lived in the mountains that werent aloud to practice their religion or carry swords. They came up with ninjutsu (art of invisibility) to protect themselves from the corrupt Samurai. they didnt learn it to become assasins.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 12:41 p.m. CST

    real ninja movie = flipping out+killing everyone+wailing on guit

    by turketron

    That is the real ultimate power of ninjutsu.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 12:41 p.m. CST

    wailing on guitars that is

    by turketron

    i made half of the word invisible using ninja magic.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 12:43 p.m. CST

    there better be

    by noiretblanc

    yellow, blue and red ninjas. OR ELSE...i will grumble

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 12:50 p.m. CST

    Ninja Facts!

    by Darth Macchio

    Did you know that the actual word that generally/generically defines the martial art of the Ninja is Ninpo? Ninjitsu doesn't mean "The art of invisibility" but loosely describes the process of learning for a person who studies this art (basically, the "ja" part of the word 'ninja'). 'Nin' loosely translates as "indomitable spirit" or "unbreakable will". Thus, a "ninja" is a person of unbreakable will. 'Nin' also has metaphorical paralells in the 'sword' or any notion "driven, directed energy". Any native Japanese speakers, please correct me if I'm wrong (thx!).

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 12:51 p.m. CST

    by the way, the plural form of ninja

    by noiretblanc

    can be either ninja or ninjas

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 12:52 p.m. CST


    by Knugen

    What kind of bullshit is that? You came up with that shit praying to gaia and smoking shit. Some people kill people for money - deal with it.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 1 p.m. CST

    Has anyone seen

    by StrokerX

    Sword of the Stranger? now THAT's cool. but yeah this does look good.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 1:06 p.m. CST

    Looks good, but...

    by xsi kal

    Like almost every other 'ninja' movie... that's wushu. Not that there's anything wrong with wushu, but... <br><br> As far as ninjutsu goes, I've seen Sensei Hatsumi in person in Japan, and he's amazing. (I was there to train, but most of the instruction was honestly so far over my head that I was mostly just soaking up the atmosphere)

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 1:18 p.m. CST


    by Galactic

    Make it happen.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 1:39 p.m. CST

    The sequel should be REAL ULTIMATE POWER

    by most excellent ninja

    where the hero commits sedduku via eating a frisbee.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 1:48 p.m. CST

    This is the kind of action the Star Wars prequels needed

    by Han Cholo

    Especially if this was Anakin killing off the Jedi in the temple. I think everyone would have been happy. Seriously, if they ever decide to make another Star Wars film, they really need to enlist this team here for lightsaber duels.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 1:57 p.m. CST

    Oh yeah, and 9 Deaths of the Ninja rocked as well!

    by Han Cholo

    Though I think it was a lesser Sho Kosugi film, the black chick in that movie was hilarious! I even remember one of her lines: "Don't mess with me chump! You shoot me and my girls will SNUFF your monkey ass!!!"

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 3:21 p.m. CST

    I am a fat geek

    by Movietool

    Why should I be subjected to looking at such in-shape people?

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 5:39 p.m. CST


    by jaddicoat

    Listening to 'The People; by The Music while you're watching this video. It works well for me.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 5:47 p.m. CST

    Now there's a thought...

    by ScottinDC

    I should've used these moves on my mom...she was an insufferable crank over the Christmas holiday!

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 6:06 p.m. CST

    But Motoko Kusanagi, You Never Saw SPEED RACER!

    by LaserPants

    You saw the trailers, realized it wasn't T2: WE WUB WOO ROBODADDY aka T2: WHY DO WOO CWY?, and immediately declared that it sucked. Hence, your opinion has no credibility whatsoever. I mean, if you had seen it and hated it, thats fine. But you didn't, so your opinion means nothing.<br><br>Feel free to note that MOST of the people here who actually watched the movie (on dvd, since almost nobody bothered to go see it in the theatres) liked it alot. EXACTLY as I predicted would happen. Its becoming a cult fave. Of course, it may not move you as much as DER AHHHHHHHHHHHRNULD's buttcheeks, or having your eyeballs fucked out by James "Overrated" Cameron's Matrix retread, but, what could? You've already made up you're mind that Cameron is going to come hot mediocrity into your eye sockets, so, enjoy thineself! (Just don't be surprised when it bombs. I wasn't surprised when SPEED RACER bombed, even though I thought it was great!)

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 6:10 p.m. CST

    Oh, And Actually

    by LaserPants

    Eye-melting psychedelic colors coupled with pop-retro-nostalgia-futurist design DOES make it pop-art. You clearly are unaware of what the term means. I refer you to the work of Andy Warhol to start with and then work your way up from there.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 7:26 p.m. CST

    Oh fuck off LaserPants....

    by TheWaqman

    All you do is troll about T2. I rented Speed Racer on BluRay, soaked in the visuals yet I also felt brain damaged after watching it. You can keep telling yourself that it's a brilliant film, you can keep bashing T2 calling it "ROBODADDY" but I'd rather watch 3 hours of Arnold babysitting some kids and being a robotic father figure than sit through that shitty Speed Racer again. Terrible storytelling. It was completely 100 percent style over substance. It made Michael Bay films look like an excellent character study. Speed Racer is really ahead of the curve in the visual department (although I would prefer it if future films do not learn from it, because I'm not feeling the candy-visuals). But Terminator 2 is now a classic action movie and you can keep whining about it. Speed Racer is just a tech demo. And a fucking unbearable one at that.

  • When I see people calling Speed Racer one of the best things of the year and at the same time see people saying the Dark Knight was crap I start to lose faith in the world

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 9:17 p.m. CST

    Harry your man crush on Rain is getting heavy.

    by Damien Chowder

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 10:16 p.m. CST

    Go pee your pants in private, bullet3...

    by milla jovovich

    So someone disagrees with you. Big fucking deal. Cry some more.

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 10:25 p.m. CST

    most excellent ninja?

    by milla jovovich

    What is "sedduku?" Is that Korean Sudoku?

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 10:28 p.m. CST

    It's a sad day when I see a pop star that could kick my ass

    by slimballs

    This movie looks BA, and Rain looks great in the lead role. Can't wait

  • Jan. 6, 2009, 11:38 p.m. CST

    If the fighting is as good in the movie...

    by vettebro

    I'M IN!!!!

  • Jan. 7, 2009, 1 a.m. CST


    by Johnno

    I don't need to apologisizeist anything about it because the film speaks for itself! Amazing visuals! Great entertaining story! UNPRECEDENTED FILMAKING!!! All you haters can go suck an exhaust pipe! If your brain can't take it, get a CAT SCAN and prepare to soak in the working titled 'Ninja Assassins' which will be fucking your eyeballs out with a sword or one of those cool ninja star shaped knives that you throw! Possibly two of them in each of your eyes at once!

  • Jan. 7, 2009, 2:05 a.m. CST

    I liked the ninja facts before..

    by Double M

    they took themselves all serious like. You sold out ninja facts.

  • Jan. 7, 2009, 3:37 a.m. CST

    Wait till you see the Pirates video.

    by kirttrik

    They kick hella ass, with rappiores and shit.

  • Jan. 7, 2009, 3:38 a.m. CST

    How come I never see this kickass stuff in UFC?

    by kirttrik

    Alls I see there is two guys rolling around playing grab ass. Where the fuck are flips and shit?

  • Jan. 7, 2009, 4 a.m. CST

    What a way to make a livin'

    by malificus

    Makes me want to get fit and kick someone's ass.

  • Jan. 7, 2009, 4:36 a.m. CST


    by The Amazing G

    will there be a pool inside a building with synchronized swimmers swimming around in it?

  • Jan. 7, 2009, 5:03 a.m. CST

    TheWaqman Says, "WAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!"

    by LaserPants

    You cried when Robodaddy died didn't you? Aww. Thats tho thweet!<br><br> Oh, and btw, I never said SPEED RACER was brilliant, I said I loved it. Visually it was amazing, storywise it was okay, ultimately it was true to the source material. Unlike T2: WHY DO WOO CWY which all but destroyed anything cool the first one laid out. <br><br> But I suppose you missed that through the tears for Robodaddy. Why do you cwy?

  • Jan. 7, 2009, 5:07 a.m. CST

    Omg, LaserPants...

    by Motoko Kusanagi

    ...I seriously don't get it, why you still think that I haven't seen Speed Racer. And quite frankly, I don't give a fuck, the same as I don't give a fuck about that steaming pile of ape dung that calls itself a movie from the makers of the Matrix.<p>It was not necessarily one of the most awful movies I saw, but definitely one of the most boring and most annoyingly stupid and infantile flicks, stretched out to an outrageous length of two and a half hours.

  • Jan. 7, 2009, 6:01 a.m. CST

    But Motoko, You Never Saw SPEED RACER!

    by LaserPants

    Look, hey, if you saw it and hated it, thats fine, BUT YOU NEVER DID! We've already done this exercise before. You never mentioned ANYTHING that happened in the actual movie. You criticized the trailer and thats it. You know it, I know it, your Robodaddy knows it -- you NEVER saw SPEED RACER. And clearly you do care ALOT about this, or else you wouldn't have responded. You do realize that you keep walking into the same traps over and over and over again, right? I almost feel sorry for you.

  • Jan. 7, 2009, 7:50 a.m. CST

    Your love for ape dung movies puzzles me, LaserPants.

    by Motoko Kusanagi

    Seriously. <p>I've said this before: the scene where fat kid jumps behind the sofa (while watching the final minutes of the showdown race) and where that fucking chimp follows him, or that scene where Inspector Detector (or whateverthefuck he is called) silently enjoys the fireworks ARE NOT IN THE TRAILER, you monkey. <p>The same applies to Speed Racer using his oh-so-great gadget button to un-flatten his tire. The usage of that (and the other three?four?)very button is explained earlier in the movie. How the fuck should I know this from the trailers, you fracking moron? Please, explain.

  • Jan. 7, 2009, 11:30 a.m. CST

    So is liking Speed Racer the new 'ironic' thing?

    by MyManD316

    Seems there's suddenly a new crowd of people defending it because from what I remember there was almost nothing but unremitting vitriol spewing against it when it was released and for awhile afterwards.

  • Jan. 7, 2009, 1:20 p.m. CST


    by RaySquirrel

    The choreography looks great! I don't care what anyone says The Matrix Reloaded is one of my favorite action movies of all time. It is second only to the movie CONTOUR. Anyone here ever see Contour? It was made by a group of martial artists in San Fransisco that go by the name of the Stunt People. You can find the movie on Amazon and at the Stunt People official website.

  • Jan. 7, 2009, 3:09 p.m. CST

    people expect a compelling plot. from a movie called Ninja Ass

    by captainCAPSLOCK

    and for that dickhead who said Ninja Assassin is like saying Engineer Engineer; it never occurred to you that they're referring to someone that isn't a ninja, but KILLS NINJA?!?! have we gotten so stupid now that this movie has to be retitled "A Fellow With Skills So Superior That He Specializes In Killing Ninja"?

  • Jan. 7, 2009, 3:12 p.m. CST

    these martial arts/stuntmen sold me

    by captainCAPSLOCK

    hope there's plenty action to showcase them!