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The Enterprise Computer In Abrams' STAR TREK Has Found Its Voice!!

Merrick here...
And the voice will be... CHRIS ROCK!?!?

Just kidding. Majel Barrett-Roddenberry will continue her long standing tradition of voicing starship computers in J.J.'s new movie. Per THIS blurb in Variety.

Readers Talkback
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  • Dec. 11, 2008, 11:25 a.m. CST


    by TylerDurden3395

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 11:25 a.m. CST

    Always wanted to say that

    by TylerDurden3395

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 11:26 a.m. CST

    Kirker ass Kirker

    by :-o

    Rock would be awesome.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 11:27 a.m. CST

    and this is a surprise?

    by j2talk

    old news....

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 11:28 a.m. CST

    it should be Paul Mooney

    by onaps6453

    "Uhura makes Wayne Brady look like Malcolm X"

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 11:28 a.m. CST

    I'd have sworn that this was leaked a long time ago

    by j2talk

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 11:28 a.m. CST

    TylerDurden3395 is a stupid cunt...

    by LordPorkington

    For saying 'First' and not a lot else. Always wanted to say that. Excellent choice of computer voice though, if only for continuity purposes. Still not sure about this movie...

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 11:29 a.m. CST


    by mattforce7


  • Dec. 11, 2008, 11:30 a.m. CST

    i would have

    by mattforce7

    preferred Wilfred Brimbly

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 11:31 a.m. CST

    Scared me

    by Exile236

    ...for a second till I scrolled down. Jesus!

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 11:32 a.m. CST

    LordPorkington is jealous for being 7th. And he's a cunt scab

    by TylerDurden3395

    And this is old news.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 11:36 a.m. CST

    So it's not Julianne Moore?

    by Rommel Catuncan

    Ah. <P> I thought it was. <P> It sounds like her.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 11:40 a.m. CST

    Seems funny

    by Flyingcircus

    to update everything, make the ship all sleek and shiny and state-of-the-Apple-art and then give it the voice of an 80 year old woman.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 11:41 a.m. CST

    Talk about your no brainer decision.

    by Grammaton Cleric Binks

    That's like considering someone other than James Earl Jones for the Star Wars prequeles. Or, someone other than Peter Cullen for Optimus Prime in Transformers. Or, someone other than Frank Welker in oh,.....wait.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 11:43 a.m. CST

    Thats not funny, Merrick. Go back into your hole.

    by dr sauch

    I honestly had a mini-stroke. My face twitched perceivably when I read the Chris Rock thing. Lets not do this again, mkay?

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 11:43 a.m. CST

    Um, the TOS computer didn't talk

    by Norm

    I always thought the talking computer was unnecessary. The "Warning, shields down to 40%" Galaxy Quest spent 5 minutes making fun of it. Isn't that what readouts are for? Plus, it always feels like lazy dialog writing. Isn't there anything more interesting to say, something that would advance the plot? Talking computers, unless conscious, are lame. And if conscious, they're more likely to kill you than not, so really, talking computers are just an all around bad idea.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 11:44 a.m. CST

    Actually, Chris Rock

    by Gabba-UK

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 11:44 a.m. CST

    Grammaton Cleric Binks

    by timmer33

    Yeah, because TOS always used Majel Barrett-Rodenberry's voi --- er, wait a minute ...

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 11:46 a.m. CST

    Merrick that isn't funny.

    by The Reluctant Austinite

    I only brought so many pairs of underwear with me to Austin. I now have one less.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 11:47 a.m. CST

    Warning...Norm is a Harry Mudd Android

    by crankyoldguy

    sure it talked, in the filtered, processed as they could then voice of Majel Barrett. "Working".... Yeah, the talking is a little silly now, 40-plus years on, but still, there's some right about using her for this.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 11:47 a.m. CST

    wow, a lot of baggage for a reboot


    it's a totally new renvisioning that is seperate from the existing trekverse! oh but it has nimoy, the voice, and a few other surprises....BUT IT'S NOT OLD STAR TREK!!! how then exactly. these things really confuse the continuity issues geeks love so much

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 11:48 a.m. CST

    It should have been Val Kilmer.

    by SkidMarkedUndies

    It worked for Knight Rider.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 11:48 a.m. CST

    cool. i love majel

    by smudgewhat

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 11:48 a.m. CST

    Actually, that was VERY funny.


    Thank you for that.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 11:50 a.m. CST

    Actually, Chris Rock....

    by Gabba-UK

    Would be inspired but very wrong. But imagine on the Blu-ray if you had an alternate Chris Rock voiced Enterprise.... 'Computer, is there any way we could re-crystalise Dilithium?' 'Smack it with ya dick, Smack it with ya dick!!!'

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 11:51 a.m. CST

    wilfred brimley ftw!


    "thuh rom'lins is reddyin' thare PHO-ton torpeedahs''eat cher OATmeal or yull get the DIbeetis!'

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 11:52 a.m. CST


    by alice 13

    or fran drescher = shoot the goddam bridge.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 11:54 a.m. CST


    by awesomebri

    ...its not a total revisioning, its a change in the time line story, with a back story to kirk and spock from what i can see. just looks like a really slick trek! SLICK TREK, they should call it that... anyway we dont really want the original sets do we? if we could accept klingon forheads arriving in the first movie we can accept this surely.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 11:57 a.m. CST

    i think if wall-e taught us anything...

    by mr_macphisto shoulda been sigourney weaver.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 11:57 a.m. CST

    Chris Tucker

    by wash

    That's what you meant to say, but we knew that.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 12:02 p.m. CST

    I know it's not a board for this, but...

    by henrydalton

    There doesn't seem to be one. So can I be the first to say that The Dark Knight has been royally shafted in the Golden Globe noms. Just one nomination... guess what it was for...

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 12:04 p.m. CST


    by Grammaton Cleric Binks

    I'm not sure what you're getting at. She was the regular voice of TOS computer.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 12:06 p.m. CST

    Good Morning, AICN! Golden Globes Nominations? Anyone?

    by Executor

    Helloooooooo it's called NEWS.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 12:09 p.m. CST

    Hattie Hayrdige

    by Shut the Fuck up Donny

    or Norman Lovett. They're not doing anything and we KNOW that those "four new episodes" of Red Dwarf aren't happening.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 12:09 p.m. CST

    Jesus Christ, don't scare me like that!!

    by Clavius

    But awesome to see Majel doing the computer voice again. Very cool. I still remain very guarded about this though. I like a lot of what I see yet there's much I don't like.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 12:11 p.m. CST

    Good one Merrick

    by mr.brownstone

    For once you made me smile.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 12:12 p.m. CST

    Nimoy Question

    by NOVAJimBo

    So how is Nimoy in this movie? Is he sitting around the Starfleet Retirement home and some whipper snapper askes about back in the day and he tells a story that is basically a flashback?

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 12:13 p.m. CST

    to NOVAJimbo

    by VAwitch

    No, there's time-travel involved. Now how & why - that's what will help determine my satisfaction w/ using that as a plot device.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 12:14 p.m. CST

    That's cool

    by GeorgieBoy

    Finally some good news on this disaster.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 12:19 p.m. CST


    by timmer33

    No ... she didn't start until TNG.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 12:21 p.m. CST

    Slow news day then.

    by The Eskimo

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 12:21 p.m. CST


    by timmer33

    Forgive me ... just checked WIKI and it says she did. This is news to me ... sorry for the previous messages dude ... you're right.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 12:24 p.m. CST


    by Grammaton Cleric Binks

    or I'll go Gun-kata on you. Just kidding. I thought you were saying she didn't do the voice for every single episode of TOS. I don't know if she missed one or two, but nope, she was the regular voice.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 12:26 p.m. CST

    Also, I wouldn't trust Wiki 100 percent

    by Grammaton Cleric Binks

    Sure, it's write most of the time, but as people can add anything they want it isn't always 100 percent reliable. In this case though, it is. Also, check out IMDB to see her list of credits including all the Star Trek stuff both as the computer, and other roles.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 12:30 p.m. CST

    And who is repeating the technobabble?

    by quintana007

    Sigourney Weaver? "I have ONE job on this lousy ship. It's stupid, but I'm gonna do it!!!!"

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 12:30 p.m. CST


    by GeorgieBoy

    I thought James Doohan was the original voice of the Enterprise computer?

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 12:30 p.m. CST

    Golden Globes announced nominees

    by applescruff

    In Bruges for Best Picture Comedy and Best Actor nods for Colin Farrell and Brendan Gleeson!<br><br> Also, James Franco nominated for Best Actor for Pineapple Express!!!! HOLY SHIT!<bR><br> This is 100% serious by the way. Benjamin Button leads the way with the most nominations. Vicky Cristina Barcelona probably will win Best Picture Comedy.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 12:31 p.m. CST

    Agreed, let's discuss the Golden Globes

    by JoeSixPack

    Where da talkback fo dat?

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 12:32 p.m. CST

    Why not Douglas Rain? Is he dead?

    by ricarleite

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 12:33 p.m. CST

    Damn, hoping for Dennis Miller..

    by Baron Karza

    CHA-CHA the neo-pundit excelsior baba-ganoush..

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 12:34 p.m. CST

    Tickect Man from Last Action Hero Dies!

    by ThePilgrim

    Robert Prosky RIP!

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 12:35 p.m. CST

    Nigga warp speed my ass

    by eric haislar

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 12:35 p.m. CST

    Should have been Bill Shatner

    by SpyGuy

    "Atmosphere of planet below is within normal parameters...Denny Crane!"

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 12:36 p.m. CST

    You're right Pilgrim, where's his obit?

    by Grammaton Cleric Binks

    He's been in everything.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 12:37 p.m. CST


    by sokitome

    I'm not 100% sure but it was my impression Majel Barret HAS always been the voice of the computer going back to the original series, but I could be wrong.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 12:39 p.m. CST

    TylerDurden3395 - you are an idiot

    by Lamerz

    That is all.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 12:39 p.m. CST

    prosky is gone??

    by bacci40

    ok....can death take a holiday until 09?

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 12:40 p.m. CST


    by Gilkuliehe

    WALL*E didn't teach us that, man. FUTURAMA was the first thing to ever use Ripley as the voice of a spaceship and it was awesome. That is all.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 12:40 p.m. CST

    Larry the Cable Guy

    by Jollymorphic


  • Dec. 11, 2008, 12:43 p.m. CST

    Robert Prosky?

    by Shut the Fuck up Donny

    Grandpa Fred from Gremlins 2?! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 12:45 p.m. CST

    Studo owner in Mrs. Doubtfire

    by Grammaton Cleric Binks


  • Dec. 11, 2008, 12:47 p.m. CST

    Eddie Murphy

    by Grammaton Cleric Binks

    Ding. "Say man, somebody stole your diluthium crystals."

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 12:54 p.m. CST

    Geico Lizards should have had this...

    by DarfurOnTheRocks

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 12:58 p.m. CST

    Why didn't they get the guy who voiced Jazz in Transformers?

    by Rickey Henderson

    Darius McCrary? That way, when the Enterprise drops out of warp, the computer can say "THIS LOOKS LIKE A COOL PLACE TO KICK IT" and it'll be totally awesome.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 12:59 p.m. CST


    by elbowburger


  • Dec. 11, 2008, 1:04 p.m. CST

    Chris Tucker woulda been a scarier fakeout

    by chromedome

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 1:04 p.m. CST

    In the words of the immortal Mojo Nixon...

    by Kid Z

    ..."Rick Astley is a pantywaist!"

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 1:09 p.m. CST

    Chris Tucker: I ain't staying in no cargo bay for

    by Grammaton Cleric Binks

    no minutes.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 1:12 p.m. CST

    That was hilarious!

    by Darth Thoth

    Good one Merrick.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 1:15 p.m. CST

    Rip Torn would have been my choice

    by Pooter the Clown

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 1:21 p.m. CST

    I'm glad to hear that

    by Deus X Meshuga

    Gotta give them props for the gesture...I'm a hardcore old-time Trekkie,I'm trying to keep an open mind about this movie.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 1:27 p.m. CST


    by IAmJack'sUserID

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 1:33 p.m. CST

    I second the suggestion of Wilfred Brimley

    by smackfu

    and have him read the lines cold, having never seen them before and having no idea what the situation is or what he's talking about.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 1:39 p.m. CST

    TOS Computers

    by rogueleader66

    DID talk, I just don't know if it was Majel Barrets voice, but they did indeed talk. I can think of a few episodes where they did. Not as much as in the newer series, but they did talk.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 1:44 p.m. CST

    It was a more "computery" voice...

    by Royston Lodge

    ...if my memory is correct. The Abrams computer voice should be a Macintosh Classic!

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 1:49 p.m. CST

    TOS Computer

    by JonRD463

    Yeah, it talked. It was a monotonous voice that would say things like "ACCESSING" or "COMPUTING". It wasn't conversant, for lack of a better word, until TNG.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 1:52 p.m. CST


    by JamesT

    Whew. I heard it was going to be Sascha Fierce.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 1:53 p.m. CST

    Riley Martin, that was too funny

    by Grammaton Cleric Binks

    What about Crackhead Bob.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 1:53 p.m. CST

    Riley Martin...

    by grandadmiralsnackbar

    Why not Riley as the voice of the ship? "O-qua tangin-wann, the Biavians are firing." Or, Sal the Stockbroker's voice deepener he uses to voice Obama.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 1:55 p.m. CST


    by REDD

    Bobcat Goldthwait wasn't available!

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 1:55 p.m. CST

    TOS computers

    by mos6507

    She did the voice on TOS as well, but in more of a high-pitched monotone. A memorable clip, even more memorable when you think of Star Trek III:

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 2:01 p.m. CST



    you said-"I second the suggestion of Wilfred Brimley by smackfu Dec 11th, 2008 01:33:19 PM and have him read the lines cold, having never seen them before and having no idea what the situation is or what he's talking about. " <P> hilarious! and then cut the audio just after he mumbles ' what the fu-?' about the tecno-babble he just read.<P>fuck i just want to hear more brimleyisms, anywhere i can get them.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 2:04 p.m. CST


    by smackfu

    I was thinking the exact same thing, have barely audible mutterings as the mic fades out.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 2:04 p.m. CST

    the 'Trekkers' should be pleased

    by Ray Gamma

    it's at least a concession to the hard core trek nerds.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 2:08 p.m. CST


    by smackfu

    "ConTAINment on the...PRImary PLAS'm...wuts this word? Inducers? is failin, wutev'r the geezus that means"

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 2:11 p.m. CST

    TylerDurden3395 you're a fuckin turd

    by JimCurry

    Always wanted to say that.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 2:13 p.m. CST

    busted tees girl should do porn asap

    by Warcraft

    she's so hot

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 2:32 p.m. CST

    Shoulda got

    by Melvin_Pelvis

    Fran Drescher at her whinest

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 2:32 p.m. CST

    James Spader !

    by smddoc

    James Spader woulda been a great choice. He's actually got a good voice for it, and he's the Shats new husband !

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 2:33 p.m. CST

    The TOS computer had a male voice

    by SingingHatchet

    COme on, pull out your DVDs.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 2:35 p.m. CST

    Emo Phillips!!

    by skimn

    He needs the work..<p>Gilbert wait..Fran Dresher...

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 2:35 p.m. CST

    Or is that a woman...

    by SingingHatchet

    Hmmm.... maybe Gene was ahead of his day.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 2:35 p.m. CST

    Damn MelPel

    by skimn


  • Dec. 11, 2008, 2:35 p.m. CST

    whorp core britches


    whorp core britches is as immununt as di-beetis.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 2:37 p.m. CST

    Angelina Jolie

    by decypher44

    Angelina Jolie would have been PERFECT for the voice.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 2:37 p.m. CST

    I am an idiot.

    by SingingHatchet

    IMDB gives credit to Mrs. Gene. But you guys already thought I was an idiot because I voted for GWB and would vote for him again!

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 2:38 p.m. CST

    sigourney weaver

    by Sparhawk38

    also played the voice of a ship in Futurama. She would be great. It is fine that they kept the tradition going. I am just saying....

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 2:41 p.m. CST

    Fran Dresher?

    by TOGSolid

    That's just straight up nightmare inducing.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 2:53 p.m. CST

    Val Kilmer! Kitt's gotta eat.

    by Stuntcock Mike

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 3:05 p.m. CST

    Should've been a snarky Wil Wheaton voice.

    by Dingbatty

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 3:11 p.m. CST


    by Prossor

    "coordinates are GET YO AWS TO MAWZ"

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 3:17 p.m. CST

    I second Schwarzenegger....

    by TheWaqman

    that alone would make me sit through this shit.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 3:22 p.m. CST

    Dude, you scared me there!

    by StovetopStuffin'

    For a moment, I thought you were serious. Not that I don't think Chris Rock could do a good voice if he wanted to, but he would have to sound so different that no one would know it was him, which would make it pointless to pay him to do it. Whatever. Glad it's not him.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 3:28 p.m. CST

    Yakov Smirnoff

    by Oliver Queen

    In Soviet Russia, galaxy explores YOU!

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 3:28 p.m. CST

    Too bad Paul Lynde is dead.

    by EyeofPolyphemus

    He would have been great. Really.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 3:41 p.m. CST

    AH!! Fantastic news.

    by gotilk

    And her voice is amazing.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 3:47 p.m. CST

    Lol Merrick

    by Wants Vaders Executor

    Nice one

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 3:48 p.m. CST

    Eli Porter

    by wash

    He would be the best, mayne.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 3:48 p.m. CST

    Majel voiced the compute for TOP. TNG...

    by Dr.DirtyD

    ...DS9 etc.. I don't know what that person up there is talking about. Majels Wikipedia page lists EVERY series. Plus I watch an episode, or two, of TOS every night...she does the voice. No more back and forth with this shit, IT's HER.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 3:50 p.m. CST

    Hope someone is making a Majel Barret TTS engine.

    by rev_skarekroe

    'Cause she won't be around for ever.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 3:51 p.m. CST

    Wilfred Brimbly...

    by Dr.DirtyD

    "Starfleet, it's the right thing to do, and a tasty way to do it."

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 3:51 p.m. CST

    I ment TOS up there....

    by Dr.DirtyD

    O, and P are right next to each other.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 3:51 p.m. CST

    No Samuel L Jackson computer?

    by turketron


  • Dec. 11, 2008, 3:54 p.m. CST


    by codymr

    Rain is a great idea! He would have to play it a bit different from HAL though, or it would be too on the nose. Good choice though.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 3:58 p.m. CST


    by Emperor_was_a_jerk

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 4:06 p.m. CST

    Wilfred "Brimbly"...

    by gotilk

    Could be helpful if someone on the crew gets DIABEETUS!

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 4:08 p.m. CST

    Fred from the b-52s.

    by gotilk

    "life.. signs.. baby!!"

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 4:15 p.m. CST

    David Byrne from the Talking Heads

    by Aphex Twin

    You may find yourself living in a photon torpedo! You may find yourself in another part of the galaxy! You may find yourself behind the wheel of a large shuttlecraft! With beautiful quarters, and a beautiful andorian! And you may ask yourself, well, how did I get here?

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 4:17 p.m. CST

    fred from b-52's -HA


    he needs to voice something dammit. i agree, he or the late Lynd would make excellent gay spaceships. "we've got us a planet, it's as big as class M, and it's about to ex-PLODE!''Hail a little louder, sugar!' 'your WHAT?!------torpedo's...busted' and they would both gigle everytime someone said 'jeffery's tube'

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 4:18 p.m. CST

    Who here in the talk back and AICN news staff........

    by Yoda's Ball Sack a hard on after reading this???????

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 4:24 p.m. CST

    TylerDurden3395 deserves praise for being first.

    by Yoda's Ball Sack

    The rest of you bow down and kiss his ass.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 4:29 p.m. CST


    by Grammaton Cleric Binks

    I can respect a self-depreciating, self-correcting idiot.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 4:30 p.m. CST

    Ving Rhames as the computer

    by Grammaton Cleric Binks

    "I'm going to get medieval on those Klingons."

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 4:35 p.m. CST


    by The_Skook

    Like it could be any one else! Great news!

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 4:40 p.m. CST


    by Grammaton Cleric Binks

    "You ain't got no problem Kirk. I'm on the motherfucker. Chill those cadets out, and wait for the USS Wolf which should be arriving shortly." "Sheet computer, that's all you had to say."

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 4:41 p.m. CST

    Actually Eddie from Hitchhiker's would be nice

    by Aphex Twin

    Hi there! I'm Eddie your shipboard computer! </br> Kirk - "Do Something!" </br> Sure thing fella! Switching to manual control!

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 4:42 p.m. CST

    I'm surprise no one mentioned Hall 9000

    by Grammaton Cleric Binks

    That chunk of crap would even piss Spock off.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 4:44 p.m. CST

    Colossus: the Forbin Project

    by Grammaton Cleric Binks

    To Kirk "How many times a week to you require female companionship." Kirk: Let's see, once a day minimum, two on an average day, three on a good day, some need to be green. Colussus: "I said need,not want." Kirk: "I know, now where was I? You made me lose count."

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 4:45 p.m. CST

    It should have been Carol Channing

    by Orionsangels

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 4:59 p.m. CST

    That's satisfactory. I was afraid they'd use

    by kabong

    a sexy female voice and Kirkster would reprogram the holodeck (not invented at that time but who gives a shit, not JarJar) with some transporter pattern stuff and be banging away. Har de har har. Dis Trek stuff is great.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 5:01 p.m. CST

    Should have been Sigourney Weaver

    by Playkins

    Would have been a great little in-joke.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 5:24 p.m. CST

    A decent decision for once

    by photoboy

    Shame the story and production design are shit.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 5:29 p.m. CST

    I hope this reboot introduces

    by Melvin_Pelvis

    Ninja Vulcans, and Pirate Vulcans, and Zombie Vulcans and thus, Zombie Ninja Pirate Vulcans

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 5:35 p.m. CST

    Kirk (Shatner) to TOS computer

    by matineer

    Kirk to computer: Star Trek 11, analysis, please. Computer: Star Trek 11. Entertainment film, premiered in 2009, Earth. Star Trek 11 revised 1960's Earth televised serial Star Trek, utilizing younger actors, CGI special effects. Designed to supplant original series, renew Star Trek movie franchise. Film total box office take amounted to-- Kirk: Cancel. Explain why William Shatner did not appear. Computer: Non-essential personnel.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 5:40 p.m. CST

    Chris Rock as a Zebra alien ensign

    by crankyoldguy

    Mr. Spock, Scotty says the crackalacka warp engines canna take anymore...

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 6:10 p.m. CST

    john malkovich as the computer

    by vaudeville villain

    this wormhole is mine and must be sealed up forever. for the love of god!

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 6:20 p.m. CST

    The Enterprise Computer did talk.

    by OneBuckFilms

    There were a couple of different voices over the 3 year run, including Majel Barret-Roddenberry. It was in this monotone, mechanical fashion, and often accompanied by this rapid teletype/typewriter sound. "working ....." lengthy typing sound "creature would have to be pure energy ...." dramatic music clip.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 6:21 p.m. CST

    thank you, merrick

    by freydis

    that was terrifying/hilarious.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 6:35 p.m. CST

    "WARP 7 MY ASS!!! Oh motha fucker...."

    by br1947

    That actually would have been kinda entertaining. We already know this thing is gonna piss off all Trekies (myself included) so why not just say 'fuck it' and go for a spoof..

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 6:35 p.m. CST

    Majel is great

    by Anakin Whoopass

    I always liked the competing theories that the voice was either because the character of Number One in "The Cage" originally programmed the computer, or because Spock programmed the computer to sound like Nurse Chapel. There was at least one cute scene in TNG where Lwaxana Troi and the computer conversed.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 7:32 p.m. CST

    You guys are all just twisted... the perfect voices are either..

    by topfivevideo

    Steven Wright or Brian Posehn

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 7:33 p.m. CST

    Good one.

    by Heckles

    Clicked on the link and was hoping it was Majel. The Chris Rock shit made me laugh.<br><br>"Why is it Klingons always want credit for shit they supposed to do? Sayin' 'I ain't never been to Rura Penthe'... you not supposed to you dumb motherfucka!"

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 7:58 p.m. CST

    Merrick, you almost had me...

    by jimmy rabbitte

    ...with that Chris Rock shit...<p> No offense to Mr. Rock; but his voice is all wrong for a starship computer. Majel Barret is good, safe choice.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 7:58 p.m. CST

    Make It so....

    by closeencounter

    Good for Majel.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 8:07 p.m. CST

    Why not Val Kilmer? He needs a voice job now.

    by Bob Cryptonight

    Since KNIGHT RIDER is D.O.A.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 8:15 p.m. CST

    How about Casey Kasem?

    by Ingeld

    "Warning. Coming in at Warp factor 5, there is the legendary Klingon Cruiser with their big hit--the photon torpedo."

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 8:47 p.m. CST


    by Bouncy X

    that was hilarious. i actually laughed outloud, i think its partly because i could hear casey's voice actually saying that. lol

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 8:53 p.m. CST

    "The Problem With New Pussy Is..."

    by BigTuna

    Chris Rock would be a great voice.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 9:32 p.m. CST

    Steven Wright?!

    by Darkman

    If that were the case, I'd see this opening day. <br><br> And I'm not even a "Star Trek" fan.

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 10:45 p.m. CST


    by BringingSexyBack

    Warp speed, angels!

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 10:50 p.m. CST

    "Y'all evah notice..."

    by BurnHollywood

    "...That when white computers talk, they're all up high LIKE THIS, but when black computers talk, they're all down low LIKE THIS?!<p> "I'm tellin' ya...that's why they'll NEVER let a black guy do a computer voice on a Starship! Whitey can't handle th' FLAVA!"

  • Dec. 11, 2008, 11:35 p.m. CST

    Majel-voice comp is only TNG-era!

    by TallBoy66

    WAY TO FUCK WITH CONTINUITY, JJ! Kiddin', but only slightly.

  • Dec. 12, 2008, 2:50 a.m. CST

    Hulk Hogan as the voice

    by JoeSixPack

    "Whatcha gonna do when the Enterprise runs wild on you, BROTHER!!!"

  • Dec. 12, 2008, 3:16 a.m. CST

    From James Cameron, director of ALIENS and T2...

    by Motoko Kusanagi

    ...comes the next milestone in motion picture history: AVATAR - Fucking your eyeballs in 2009!

  • Dec. 12, 2008, 5:03 a.m. CST

    From Motoko Kusanagi...

    by quantize

    ..comes the most predictable post conceivable..fucking you bored stiff in 2008

  • Dec. 12, 2008, 5:20 a.m. CST

    What next, a black president?

    by BendersShinyAss

    can you imagine it. "Maaaaaan Kirk you cwazy bitch CWAZY" to which Kirk replies (in classic over the top shatner) "Spock! can you... turn off that..... blasted thing!" <p> damn it could be the next great buddy sensation. <p> the computer didn't have the next gen voice with the old crew. not even in the films. you suck abrams! only kidding, luv ya work bud.

  • Dec. 12, 2008, 7:47 a.m. CST

    Ric Flair as Red Alert

    by Grammaton Cleric Binks


  • Dec. 12, 2008, 8:24 a.m. CST

    So they changed everything about Star Trek except this?

    by ExcaliburFfolkes

    Is this supposed to be some kind of concession of continuity to the fans so that Abrams and co. can say, "See, see we left some things the same!"

  • Dec. 12, 2008, 8:29 a.m. CST

    Clint Eastwood as the computer

    by Grammaton Cleric Binks

    "Go ahead, make my Stardate"

  • Dec. 12, 2008, 8:29 a.m. CST

    Charlton Heston as the computer

    by Grammaton Cleric Binks

    "Get your stinking paws off me you damn dirty Klingons."

  • Dec. 12, 2008, 8:51 a.m. CST

    Lorne Greene as the computer

    by DarfurOnTheRocks

  • Dec. 12, 2008, 8:51 a.m. CST

    What about MISSION IMPOSSIBLE tape guy

    by NoHubris

    Kittridge was his name in the first movie.<p>"This computer tape will self-destruct in five seconds." :-)

  • Dec. 12, 2008, 10:03 a.m. CST

    WOPR as the computer

    by ArcadianDS

    The only way to win this movie, is not to see it.

  • Dec. 12, 2008, 10:22 a.m. CST

    You can't be serious. Bitchin about the computer talking?

    by The Founder

    I can see y fanboys getthe shaft. Serioulsy WHO GIVES A PHUCK IF THE COMPUTER DIDN'T TALK IN THE TOS BUT SPEAKS NOW? This is a non issue.

  • Dec. 12, 2008, 10:28 a.m. CST

    The time barrier has been broken.

    by kabong

    You won't believe how fast our ships can go. <P> DEATH TO TREK

  • Dec. 12, 2008, 10:35 a.m. CST

    Charlton Heston!?!?!?!?

    by topfivevideo

    Hes fucking dead you tard!!!!

  • Dec. 12, 2008, 10:43 a.m. CST

    Bill Cosby as Mushmouth for the computer!

    by ZeroCorpse

    Oxybgen levebel isbuh normbumal. Probabubibity obbuh ablibien inbuhtrusibuhn ibisuh tenbuhnty perbuhcent. <p> Kirk: WHAT?!?!?

  • Dec. 12, 2008, 10:44 a.m. CST


    by Grammaton Cleric Binks

    That's hasn't stopped Hollywood before.

  • Dec. 12, 2008, 11:22 a.m. CST

    To hell with continuity, except the one important

    by Ingeld

    thing to me is that when they beam someone up, they operate the transporter by sliding three levers/buttons up. When I finally see that, then and only then I will know that I am in the Star Trek universe. Hmmmmmm good.

  • Dec. 12, 2008, 11:56 a.m. CST

    No Christopher Walken?

    by turketron

    That would have been great.

  • Dec. 12, 2008, 1:45 p.m. CST

    what the fuck is this?

    by mrbong

    unless i missed something in the trailer about the computer on the spaceship going all fucking HAL, just who the fuck cares voices the computer that says "red alert"??

  • Dec. 12, 2008, 2:21 p.m. CST

    Sounds great...

    by beelkay

    But she's getting old...they'd better find someone who can do an impression of her voice or something.

  • Dec. 12, 2008, 9:10 p.m. CST

    You tricked film critic Roger Moore:

    by doubledown44

  • Dec. 12, 2008, 9:11 p.m. CST

    From Moore's blog:

    by doubledown44

    Bad idea of the year--Is Chris Rock to be the voice of the Enterprise computer in Star Trek? Posted: 12 Dec 2008 05:53 AM PST Computer voices in movies are traditionally muted, neutral sounds, the best ever being the HAL 9000 in 2001: A Space Odyssey. Ain't it Cool News says Chris Rock might voice the computer in the new J.J. Abrams Star Trek movie,...

  • Dec. 12, 2008, 10:57 p.m. CST

    doubledown44 did you mean Roger Ebert

    by Grammaton Cleric Binks

    I don't know a movie critic Roger Moore. Unless there really is one with the same name as James Bond.

  • Dec. 13, 2008, 2:13 a.m. CST

    Thank goodness!

    by tigerwolf

    Honestly I'm surprised. I figured it would be some random person, and just sound terrible. Majel Barret is THE best computer voice ever, as far as I'm concerened. They need to make recordings of her voice to use for real computers down the line...

  • Dec. 13, 2008, 6:48 p.m. CST

    Dammit !!!

    by pumaman

    It should have been Gary Busey !!!!!!