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Capone finds TWILIGHT neither romantic nor creepy, even with all of those pretty faces!!!
Hey everyone. Capone in Chicago here.
I've never read one of Stephenie Meyer's novels about the tormented love affair between the human Bella and the vampire Edward, so when I speak about TWILIGHT, I am only discussing the film version and whether or not I was indoctrinated into this story to any degree of satisfaction. I want to know if screenwriter Melissa Rosenberg and director Catherine Hardwicke (THIRTEEN; LORDS OF DOGTOWN) have constructed a compelling film for those of us who know nothing about novels or where the tale of these angst-ridden teens is headed. The truth is that Twilight is a beautiful-looking work with a pair of the most bizarre and frustrating characters you're likely to see in a film this year. I'll give the movie credit for avoiding most of the infuriating trappings of modern vampire films, but that doesn't make the resulting work all that captivating.
And let me add this right up front, if you do go see Twilight and coo and swoon over the film and try to tell me it's a great movie, I'm going to point you right at a theater in this city playing LET THE RIGHT ONE IN to give you a prime example of a truly great young vampire tale. I realize it's not fair to compare these two movies, but for all its trumped-up drama, longing gazes and breathy dialogue, TWILIGHT doesn't hold a candle to the emotional weight of the stark Swedish vampire story about a 12-year-old boy who falls in love with a same-aged vampire girl.
I should applaud the choice of Hardwicke to direct TWILIGHT. She has made a succession of films in recent years that tap into hormonally heightened teens, and this story seemed almost written for her. Bella (Kristen Stewart) is a withdrawn girl moving from her mother's home in Phoenix to her father's place in the rainy Pacific Northwest, where she spent her early years when her parents were still together. She reunites with old friends, including the Native American Jacob (Taylor Lautner), and meets a whole slew of new ones. It is at school where she first becomes acquainted with the Cullen "family," who all dress rather formal for high school, are intensely pale, and pretty much stick to themselves. Bella is paired with Edward (Robert Pattinson) as a science glass lab partner, and the two seem unnaturally drawn to each other. Much of what follows is a variation (although not that great a variation) on a high school courtship movie. The two dance around each other and their unmistakable attraction, but a series of strange incidents involving Edward popping up in the least likely places and a little investigating lead Bella to discover the truth about Edward--he's a vampire.
One of the reasons I'm guessing TWILIGHT was such a big hit among the younger female sect is that Edward and his family are "good" vampires, trained only to drink the blood of animals and resist killing humans. And what self-respecting 13-year-old girl doesn't want to hang with good vampires? But since you can't have good without bad, we eventually do meet the villains of the piece, three vampires (led by Cam Gigandet's James) who stalk and kill humans, and have moved into the area not knowing that the Cullens have laid claim to the area. We can tell they're bad vamps because they dress like they just left the club at 4am and are still ready to party.
One thing I did like about TWILIGHT is the way Hardwicke shows the balancing act that Bella lives everyday going between the human world at high school and living with her sheriff father (Billy Burke), and getting to know Edward and his family, led by Peter Pacinelli as Dr. Cullen (cool idea making the local medical examiner a vampire; that way he can cover up any suspicious deaths in the area). But as much as I tend to admire Stewart's style of acting (in such works as INTO THE WILD and this year's WHAT JUST HAPPENED?), her stammering and nervous ticks started to grate on me after a while. She brushes hair out of her face and wrings her hands so often that it's distracting I realize Bella is a fish out of water and a natural-born klutz to begin with, but I felt like Stewart was flailing and uncomfortable playing someone with zero boundaries or filters. It also seems impossible for her to finish a thought or a sentence. I imagine a screenplay loaded with ellipses (...).
And then we move on to Pattinson, who plays Edward as the vampire version of James Dean complete with gravity-defying hair, the whitest skin available in a makeup kit, and red lips that make him look more like someone you'd meet in a tranny bar than a haunted house. His eyes almost never leave Bella, which is meant to invoke some sort of sexual tension or danger, but to me it was just plain creepy. In fact, there are so many moments of mutual glaring at each other in the film's early moments that some of the young die hards were even laughing in the audience when I saw the film. Edward stammers slightly less than Stewart, but he's completely devoid of any charm or grace despite his insane good looks. One show-and-tell sequence in which Edward allows Bella to see the full extent of his physical abilities is about the closest we ever get to a traditional seduction, although a bedroom kiss in the home of the virginal Bella is one of the rare instances of on-screen chemistry between Stewart and Pattinson.
TWILIGHT is not a complete failure. Hardwicke's work in showing up this sleepy little down in Washington state almost makes it feel otherworldly. Some of Meyer's' takes on age-old vampire lore are kind of neat (direct sunlight doesn't hurt these vampires but it does make they sparkle like they have diamonds under their skin). And I'm pretty sure we never see a set of fangs in the whole movie. Once the film moves away from the romance and into a cat-and-mouse game between the good and bad vampires, the tension is strong enough to keep us entertained. But in the end, TWILIGHT is little more than a "Dark Shadows" for the high school set. It's a soap opera with a bigger budget, and a not-so-veiled plea from Meyer for abstinence before marriage. But it's a clever and well thought out gimmick that seems to drive the young girls wild, both in book and movie form. You have to respect that on some level. In a lesser director's hands, the film would have been a cataclysmic mess. In Hardwicke's capable hands, TWILIGHT is passable without being exceptional in any way.
-- Capone
capone@aintitcoolmail.com
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is Valerie and Her Week of Wonders, an awesome, surreal Czech gem of a movie with one of the best soundtracks ever made. Check it out, Cap!
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Nov 21, 2008 7:01:19 AM CST
How many fucking Twilight reviews are there on this site?
by i_am_not_the_droid_you_are_looking_for
Where's the fucking TB dedicated to The Wrestler?
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saw it, hated it, watch smallville instead the soap opera factor is less there... really.
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Best review of that movie on this site so far.
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Damn You Michael Bay
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from america.
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And it's playing in select cities. You know, like many foreign films. Chillax. I got to see it.
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It certainly must be available on hundreds, nay thousands of screens, because that's what Hollywood does with high quality imports (especially ones it's already remaking for American sensibilities). Besides, it's Swedish, which means it must be on a minimum of 2,000 screens.
Fuck, right, the world isn't fair. It's a shame that this "Right Before Dark, But Not Quite Full Dark" movie is going to make a shitload of money.
I'd rather be watching Harry Potter 6. -
Twilight vs High School: the Musical
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Twilight is a masterpiece of mood and timing compared to Love Story (1970). Did that stop it from making the big bucks? Nope! It was the time of student unrest, and some smart producer said: "Let's take an old sappy script and make it relevant to today's youth!". Ah how soon we forget what it was like to be 17.
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I know! I've been waiting for that movie to come to town for months! I guess I'll have to wait for BluRay
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Anytime you get to see Anna Paquin naked or wearing close to nothing, always hands down a winner.
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I know, maybe JJ is not a fan Vampire movies either and can reboot them...shame the cast of 90210 are already busy..
Hollywood is simply too fucking dumb to get behind 'Let The Right One In'...think about that everytime you see Nicole Kidman on the Today show next week. -
saw it in Philly. Twilight...I'm thinking not so much
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won't receive a major release in the USA. studios bought the film. only limited release shows in the usa are ones scheduled before it was bought.
let the right one in, will be shown as Let Me In after hollywood finishes remaking it and reshooting it. with the new american version coming out in 2009/2010. and the official dvd release of the original following 6 months later in the usa.
until then, you can catch one of the limited arthouse engagements, buy the import of the dvd, wait until the official usa dvd release, or pirate it. -
Let The Right One In will be ignored the same way Near Dark was back in '87, whilst all the idiots line up for Twilight.
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I'm 42, male, scifi nerd. Will watch anyway. Curiosity-killing cat.
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should boycott this Mormon piece of shit.
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just wait till the 4th movie when Edward begs Bella to get an abortion.
seriously. -
OMG...where do I sign up...?
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Is that all teens are and are drawn to now is moody whiny shit? From what I heard about this movie, its for emo fags.
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*shudders* I wish you were joking. I hope the series never makes it that far. The 4th books sucked... f**k it, it sucked so hard I can't even come up with an analogy.
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i'll make a slight defense of Twilight as a continuing series of movies. Remember how the first Harry Potter movie sucked so much? Well, this sucked the same way that did, but it was made on a much smaller budge. If Twilight rakes in about 200 million (which is a pretty conservative estimate), then the next film should have a bigger budget, better special effects and be an overall more enjoyable film.
Or not. -
Yes, it was over-the-top wacky, but the only one where Bella stops maundering on about her love for Edward (right when she finally gets some), and real action actually takes place. It's the one that will probably make the best movie - all the others take place mostly in Bella's head. Also, the reason why Edward was attracted to Bella was never really explained until the last book. It was a puzzling mystery until then. (Her attraction was spelled out over and over - she thought he was hot, and loved his amazingly unteenagerly self-control in that he never made a move on her).
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Seriously. Every movie now shows vampirism as cool (save for maybe this LTROI which I haven't seen). It is getting so old.
Somebody do a movie where a vampire is an inhuman, evil monster who view humans just as cattle, please. Emo-vampires have run their course. -
I love independent filmmaking but I gotta say, I enjoyed Twilight way more then I enjoyed Let the Right One In. I feel like it's a conspiracy that LTROI has all these glowing reviews. There really wasn't much to the movie at all. Attack me all you want but it's true. Explain to me why Let the Right One In is so fucking great, when it's not. Twilight may be for screaming tweens but this 24 year old male enjoyed the hell out of it.
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why are people who watch this movie idiots? They enjoy a simple fucking love story and people like you have ot bash them for it. I feel there's a place in this world for great movies just like there's a place for stuff like High School Musical. Everything has its target audience and what's so wrong with that? Everybody feels the need to attack something they don't enjoy. Why don't they just realize it's not for them? Movies like Near Dark and Let the Right One in have as much a place in this world as Lost Boys and Twilight. Why should any of us care how much money these movies are making? All of these movies are here for our enjoyment and not all of them are going cater to your movie-going needs.
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I like...elipsis use...duh. But Twilight? I loathed the book, so why should I have to suffer in a theater. So the wife had a girls night out while me and one of the dads let the kids have a night together in at our place; he's now a fan of this site, having never seen it before, watching me post and post tonight.
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Massa nailed it in his from why it does appeal to women to its abuse of all vampire lore and more. IT'S NOT A VAMPIRE MOVIE.
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it's a simple-minded love story I have issues with. Want a list of the complex ones that are far superior? and if you don't like attacking and parrying and defending and so on, maybe these pages here ain't for you...
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call me when you at least past 30...boy
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To express how I'm not the target audience. I really rather start a conversation on Let the Right One In, I really am finding it hard to understand why people like it so much. Twilight is a simple minded love story. The movie is basically like an emo version of a romantic comedy but I was able to enjoy it. I had a real good time with it is all and I think I should be on these message board. The writers on this site, Moriarty, Harry, etc, know that all talkbackers do is whine and whine and whine. Sometimes it's justified but most of the time people either nitpick or bash something which isn't targeted towards them to begin with. It's a vampire love story for young girls and older housewives who read romantic novels. That's what i expected the film to be like and I enjoyed it and feel no shame in saying so.
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the movie complex or anything and just because there's far superior film out there doesn't make it a bad movie. Something a simple fairy tale like love story is all I need. Everything doesn't have to emulate real life. It's fiction for chrissake so get over yourself.
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for people who want their independent film, move to a major city. I live in Chicago where Let the Right One In is playing at a few cinemas. It's even playing at a 21 plex in downtown Chicago. We also got JCVD. It's be even sweeter if I actually enjoyed these two films but unfortunately, I did not. The bright spots of my week have been Twilight and Season 3 of the Wire.
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so i can't comment. But addressing your other point, it's not just a question of the "targeting." When someone tells you something is so great and you experience it - in this case, my wife saying read the book, you'll get it - and then you find it wretched (no honey, I don't get it, it's a lame story, lame romance, not all wonderful), then they get mad, hurt, etc. that you don't like it. Too bad, it was brought up.
Hell, I'm a suck for a grand romance that's pained and difficult - John and Aeryn in Farscape, Buffy-Angel (far better than Twilight) - as well as romantic comedies (I mentioned the original Sabrina in another Talkback as one example. The love story in Enchanted was more charming. Granted I'm fighting to not waste money by being dragged to see this film, but why should I, since I loathed the book? And sorry for the boy crack - your age stating example was fair, okay?- I've just lived longer and yeah, I get cranky. One other thing: Did it bother you that these "Vampires" barely acted like Vampires and most of the lore is tossed out the window with intelligent dialogue? -
I meant if a movie wants to explain it then fine but I'm open to different takes on it and I don't need everything spelled out. And what do vampires act like? They're a family of vampires who are brought up to value human life. I like that take on it a lot. Just because someone originally came up with the idea of a vampire doesn't mean it can't be played with. Same thing that's going on with James Bond right now. A lot of people are hating on the series because it's changing. People need to accept that people are always trying to reinvent something with their own little details. If I want a classic vampire movie then I'll watch a classic vampire movie but I have nothing against them playing with it. Now, I'm not saying Twilight was a great movie, it's just something I was able to sit down and enjoy for two hours. I have not read the book, so I can't judge that. Sometimes I can just go to the movie theatre looking to be entertained and ultimately, that's what this film did for me. I'm just a very open minded person who's able to look at something for what it is and judge in on those terms. A man once said, "If you limit your views, you limit your life." I try to look at everything and see it for what it is and I'm able to walk away rewarded more often than not.
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Something else maybe, male-female succubi of blood, whatever, but they are not Vampires. Period.
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Vampires are immortal, and feed off human or animal blood. Details are they sleep during the day and can't be in the daylight and they don't have a reflection in a mirror. Just details man. Two of the most important details are there so I consider them vampires. What is it that doesn't make them vampires?
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details my ass. and don't say "man" son, it does show our age, okay? Now if you don't get it, it's clearly not a genre you care for. have you tried the romance novel section? I suppose they don't need facts either, instead they use heat???? This is all bullshit. Okay. They I want to hit hard-boiled eggs with a wood spoon and run to bases. I'm still calling it baseball.
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I simply asked what is it that makes them not vampires? If you're going to give some simple details then it proves what i said earlier. And yes, I would still call it baseball. Such small details. They suck blood and they're immortal. What more do you want?
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You're kidding me right? I can speak whichever way I want to. Am I supposed to be ashamed to be a 24-year old? How does speaking a certain way dictate how old you are? That's pretty shallow.
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mormons may crave, but cant have anything with caffeine...so they substitute other stuff...these are mormon vamps who crave human blood, but cant have it...they cant have sex either...they cant have fun, yet dont mind living forever...the vamps from lost boys would rip their guts out
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character from Near Dark would annihilate the vamps from Lost Boys.
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I agree with the above person who said this. In fact I had heated arguments in my analytical horror class about this. What makes vampires sexy? I dunno about anyone else, but when I think of vampires I think of mosquito...and maybe it is just me, but mosquito are not sexy. Not. One. Bit.
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I don't mind seductive vampires, but I've had my fill of them for a while. Any Vampires that actually follow the 'cursed by God' mythos have to be disgusting, repellent creatures. Lets try s'more Nosferatu types,eh?
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The reasons so many people are so against Twilight are as follows:1) Twilight's value-system is derived from that of the Mormon church; they want all kinds of secular-world things that they cannot have, and need to substitute theological swoon for actual (and healthy) satisfaction. The entire book is a salespitch for abstinence. Bella wants an abortion in the 4th book but Edward doesn't want her to have one - the list goes on. And on. And on.2) The love story is not just "simple"; if it were, there would be no problem. However, it is also dull and trite, cliched and hackneyed and creepy. Which leads me to...4) Edward is 90 years old and still trolling for 17 year-old-tail. Is THAT romantic? Is THAT "love"? His behavior is demonstrably stalker-like in every way. Also, Edward - through his actions in the story - is the PERFECT textbook illustration of "abusive and possessive and overprotective - and yes ABUSIVE - boyfriend." Moreover, Bella is the perfect and ready-made template called "Abuse Victim." Her responses to Edward, in fact the entire dynamic of their relationship, is abusive and threatening.5) Stephanie Meyers, with the changes she has brought to the genre, has both eviscerated and emasculated the "vampire legend," and has domesticated it entirely, when in fact one central alluring aspect of the vampire legend is the fact that it breaks domestic boundaries.I've gone easy on you, ranma, because you're not old enough to have taken a Literary Criticism class, nor are you old enough to have done a serious (read: academic) study of the horror or romance genres. More to come - guaranteed.
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You bring all this baggage from having read the book series which I've never done. I'm just judging the film on the merits that it presented and that's it. I'm not trying to analyze what makes up vampire legend or how it gets its values from the Mormons. I couldn't care less about all that. I just had a good time last night watching this movie. It's not a movie I'll own or even revisit but it was a satisfactory viewing. You can point out all its flaws which are plentiful, but I pay no mind to any of that. And I feel like such a simple, mainstream work should not be broken down and analyzed like you do so. It's preposterous. If you're literally trying to criticize something like Twilight, then you have problems. That's like trying to analyze music from the Spice Girls. It's all supposed to be taken with a grain of salt, so lighten up.
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Seriously, get a fucking life. Twilight sucks, yes. Yes, it's trite tweenie swoon material. But Mormon propaganda simply because the author is Mormon? Great, now the spiritual beliefs of ANY author automatically make it propaganda for that group! I really don't see anything exclusive to Mormonism in there. Oh, the vampires are nice guys? Well, gee, if they were chowing down on humans, they wouldn't really be the good guys, now would they? And oh no, they wait until they're married to do it! My God, they're advocating abstinence until marriage! STRING MEYER UP BY HER THUMBS! Seriously, get a life. I'm smelling a whole lot of kneejerk bigotry around here...
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THEY ARE NOT VAMPIRES. Had they been called something else - immortal blood lusters, etc. - they we'd only be blasting a lame-ass, juvenile romance tale. (if you think this is a grown-up love story, you are delusional.
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Guy named Donny. He had a sense of humor and was a former teen idol. Worked with him on some entertainment projects. Never tried to convert anyone. He wasn't about dogma, unlike the subtext in this Twilight crap.
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you might be lucky to grow a pair as well in terms of a foundation of personal aesthetics. The Spice Girls were a joke. They had one actually memorable dopey pop hit. I'd love to see what's on your itunes/ipod/mp3/whatever you use. You probably think Beyonce and Fall Out Boy are good. Moron.
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I dunno, people really love the Punisher and James Bond.
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I brought up the Spice Girls to say that something like that should not be analyzed. The fact is, I like all types of music as well. And just how I said all types of movies have a place in this world so does mindless pop music. Yes, I have Fall Out Boy on my ipod, I am from Chicago, so they're hometown boys. I also really liked Spice Girls when they were hot. You can say they only had one hit but that would be false. There's nothing wrong with liking pop music. Plus, I'm not a music aficionado and I don't claim to be either. I've never gotten into older music in the likes of Elvis Costello or Bob Dylan. I've merely scratched the surface on music and film. I have a lot to learn, yes, but like I said, I feel there's a place for everything. I'd dread the day where I looked for everything to be deep and meaningful. Sometimes you just want to be entertained. There's a lot of pretentious fucks out there who want everything to be deep and complex and explore all these levels of humanity. And that's great. But there's tons of stuff out there that offers so much. Some of its deep and some of it is not but it all has a place in this world and I don't think you should be called a moron because you like some pop fluff bullshit. FYI, I have Beyonce, can't stand the whore. But I love Justin Timberlake, Kanye West and a how bunch of pop music just like I love emo shit like Brand New or AFI or indie pop like Ben Kweller and Death Cab For Cutie. I keep an open mind to shit unlike many others and like I said, earlier, up top in this talkback, to limit your views is to limit your life. I happen to think Harry Knowles is a shitty movie reviewer because he likes practically everything but it's still nice to see a reviewer who goes into everything he sees with a certain level of optimism. But people like you, crankyoldguy, make life depressing. So is there something wrong with my foundation of positive thinking? Because if there is, please state the reasons.
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A year ago, the talkbacks were defending The Golden Compass against charges of "atheist propaganda". But, now, "mormon propaganda" seems to be an acceptable criticism of Twilight. I'm just sayin.
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i saw this in utah, and the whole theater laughed when the older vampire guy said "remember who you are". it's a classic mormon youth hear a billion times growing up, and it's clear that meyers' beliefs are reflected in this movie. that's not a crime and doesn't make the book or movies "propaganda".
i think people are just upset that there's a genre-ish franchise that's hugely popular, but caters to the adolescent fantasies of girls instead of boys. -
what dogma? what are you even talking about? what the hell does donny osmond have to do with anything? stephanie meyers is not trying to convert anybody, she just wrote a book that reflects her values.
alanmoore, you sound kinda douchey. and unless you're name is really alan moore, you should change your name. -
change your screen name.
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"Knock knock"
"Who's there?"
"Mormons"
"Fuck off!"
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