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L.A. Readers! Fifteen Of You Are Going To See QUANTUM OF SOLACE Early!

Beaks here...

On November 11th at 7 PM PST at an undisclosed location here in Los Angeles, there is going to be a "fan screening" of the twenty-second installment in the James Bond franchise, QUANTUM OF SOLACE. And, thanks to Sony, we've got fifteen (15) tickets to give away to AICN's most obsessive 007 geeks residing in the greater Los Angeles area. Wanna go? Here's what you've got to do: send me an email with the subject header "QoS Tix", and hit me with a classic Bond quip involving either of the new Bond girls: Gemma Arterton's MI6 agent, "Strawberry Fields" or Olga Kurylenko's "Camille". All manner of quips are welcome. Be as nasty or corny or obscure as you want to be: you can go with a double entendre or just be unabashedly crude. And if you're feeling ambitious, feel free to provide a little context to put the joke over (allow me to stress "a little"; anything approaching slash fic will result in immediate disqualification). I really don't care what you do: just make me laugh and/or groan. Is all of this in direct opposition to the dour direction of the new Bond? Unquestionably. But you're not a true 007 fan in my book if you don't, on some level, love the worst excesses of the Connery and Moore Bonds. One entry per email address will be accepted. If you submit multiple emails, your initial entry will be trashed as well. Just so we're clear, here's what I need: 1) Email w/ subject header: "QoS" Tix 2) Quip 3) Your name and address I'll give you until Friday, November 7th @ 5 PM PST to impress me. If you need some inspiration, here's Pearl & Dean's list of the 10 "sauciest" Bond lines (via MI6):
1. "I think he's attempting re-entry." - MOONRAKER (1979) 2. "I thought Christmas comes just once a year." Bond to Dr Christmas Jones in THE WORLD IS NOT ENOUGH (1999) 3. "Just keeping the British end up." - Bond to Sir Frederick Gray in THE SPY WHO LOVED ME (1977) 4. "I'm afraid you've caught me with more than my hands up." - Bond to a gunman in DIAMONDS ARE FOREVER (1971) 5. "You appear tense... that's too bad. Going down, one should always be relaxed." Bond to 007 girl Fatima in NEVER SAY NEVER AGAIN (1983) 6. "When one is in Egypt, one should delve deeply into it's treasures." - Bond in THE SPY WHO LOVED ME (1979) 7. "It's just the right size - for me, that is." - Bond talking about 007 girl Tatiana's mouth in FROM RUSSIA WITH LOVE (1963) 8. "The bubbles tickle my... Tchaikovsky." - Bond girl Pola in A VIEW TO A KILL (1985) 9. "Something big's come up." - Bond to 007 girl Jill Masterson in GOLDFINGER (1964) 10. "I think I will enjoy serving you very much." Bond girl Aki to 007 in YOU ONLY LIVE TWICE (1967)

Readers Talkback
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  • Nov. 3, 2008, 6:32 p.m. CST


    by Magregus

    Would love to go!!!!!

  • Nov. 3, 2008, 6:39 p.m. CST

    Are they gonna download it too?

    by critch

    Cause that's what half the internet's going to do. Fucking stupid to only release it in a couple countries weeks before worldwide release.

  • Nov. 3, 2008, 6:50 p.m. CST

    Baltimore Readers... See it on the 12th

    by thefrontrowe

    OK, it's not for free, but it's a couple days early and charitable. Go to a exclusive "gala" preview at Baltimore's Landmark Theater to benefit Johns Hopkins Medicine. Tickets are a hundo a piece or buy the "License to Dine Package" for $200. Baller tickets with a VIP reception go for $100.

  • Nov. 3, 2008, 7:24 p.m. CST

    I'm already going, so see you there

    by Speed Fricassee

    ... and I laugh at your silly contest. Ha ha!

  • Nov. 3, 2008, 9:45 p.m. CST

    Damn, I've got a midterm the very next day.

    by PirateEmery

    I would totally have driven down to LA for the evening were it not the case.<p> Anyway, because I can't go, doesn't mean someone else can't. Here's my quip. Plagiarize me if you so desire.<p> "I would very much like to camille all over you."

  • Nov. 3, 2008, 9:45 p.m. CST


    by PirateEmery

    Have you found a working download? Since I've been checking all the torrent sites since Friday and I've only found fakes.

  • Nov. 3, 2008, 10:35 p.m. CST

    Too bad everyone in the UK has already seen it early

    by The_Squid

    I'm patient, but why does it take a whole two weeks for this to come out in the states. Even Russia gets it before us.

  • Nov. 4, 2008, 3:22 a.m. CST

    US was supposed to get it on the 7th,...

    by wildphantom07

    Then Warners moved Harry Potter to next summer and Sony snuck in on the apparently more lucrative weekend of the 14th. <p> Bottom line - you've all had to wait so long because of Warners decision to shaft Potter so the shareholders can all breathe easy that they have a guaranteed monster next summer.<p> Who knew that would mean you'd have to wait not one, but two weeks for what is IMO an absolutely cracking James Bond film.

  • Nov. 4, 2008, 6:48 a.m. CST


    by Mr_P

    the motion sickness pills and if anyone can tell me what he does in the boat chase then they will win a amazement

  • Nov. 4, 2008, 1:43 p.m. CST

    Not yet...

    by critch

    Doesn't appear to have leaked yet, though I'd bet big money that there'll be a copy out before this weekend. It's funny that everything moved to next summer to 'fill a hole' since next summer is as crowded as any. Star Trek moved to a May already packed by Terminator Angels and Demons Up Wolverine and Night at the Museum 2, and to a weekend that has never produced a hit. It would've done well in a Christmas with no competition, now it'll be a disaster. Harry Potter would've done better this fall, though it'll still do well since it is the biggest franchise out there. In the end it's not going to matter. Bond is not the huge franchise people think it is, and all accounts are that this is the flip side of Casino Royale. All action but no depth. The only reason it'll do above 200 million is because there's nothing else this season.

  • Nov. 5, 2008, 9:57 p.m. CST

    Only twenty seconds?

    by thedottedlion

    That seems brief. :]

  • Nov. 10, 2008, 4:21 p.m. CST

    Results? Winners?

    by Zardoz

    Who won?