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Horror Movie A Day: Quint on STUDENT BODIES (1981)
First, we will remove all these ugly little frog penises.

Ahoy, squirts! Quint here with today’s installment of A Movie A Day. [The regular A Movie A Day list has been frozen in order for me to do an all-horror line-up for October. I’ve pulled many horror titles from my regular “to see” stack and have ordered many more horror and thriller titles to make sure we have some good stuff. Like the regular AMAD column all the movies I’m covering are films I have never seen, but unlike the regular AMAD column I will not connect each film to the one before it. Instead I will pull a title at random every day and watch whatever the movie Gods determine for me.] Happy Halloween! We cap off the 31 day run of Horror AMADs with 1981’s horror movie spoof STUDENT BODIES. Now, this movie is not a horror comedy. A horror comedy is EVIL DEAD 2 or ARMY OF DARKNESS or RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD or Peter Jackson’s BRAINDEAD (aka DEAD-ALIVE) or SHAUN OF THE DEAD. This is a flat out spoof, more comfortable sitting next to movies like SATURDAY THE 14TH, which came out a few months after this film. And this movie was almost brilliant. The opening of the movie is fantastic. It’s funny, smart and full of random humor. You have a Michael Myers house clone and a subtitle that burns in saying “HALLOWEEN NIGHT” then it fades out… fading back up to the house again. This time a different holiday is slapped on the subtitle. Then it fades out again. Then fades up one more time, this time saying “Jamie Lee Curtis’ Birthday” before finally cutting inside. We get a typical stupid babysitter pretty much talking to her friend on the phone saying, “Gee, I sure hope nothing happens to me tonight,” while her prude friend on the phone is warning her not to have sex. The bad guy of the movie is called “The Breather,” who is voiced by Richard Belzer, so you get a general idea of how much the comedy is being played up with him. The Breather starts calling this girl, who is, of course, waiting for her horny boyfriend. Like any horror bimbo, she keeps answer the phone with the heavy breather on the other line. Then she doesn’t and the phone starts jumping on the table, demanding to be picked up… then I swear it cums on her. Maybe it was supposed to be saliva, but it sure didn’t look like saliva. I was thinking, “Okay, this is kind of smart and funny,” then she goes outside to check on the meowing of a cat… and they cut to a dog barking at her, except every bark is a meow. Then the dog lifts its leg to piss and they put in a ripping fart sound effect. It was this point that I was like, “This movie might be my favorite film of all time if they keep this up.” It stays strong for the entire opening scene. The girl goes back inside and the camera lingers on the door lock. If that wasn’t enough to get the point, they put a flashing arrow and the word “Unlocked!!!” The girl goes to the kitchen (which is fucking filthy, dishes piled everwhere), opens the fridge and grabs a piece of fried chicken to eat. Her boyfriend jumps her mid-bite and says he wants to do it. She’s like, “Not here, not now!” and he goes, “How about in 10 seconds in the bedroom.” “Okay.” Little things like that, poking fun at slashers, keep the opening really funny, but after the two are killed (the girl with a paperclip, the boyfriend hacked up off-camera) and we follow the main story of the virginal teen friend I’d say 90% of the jokes fall completely flat. That’s not to say there aren’t any interesting ideas… the Breather is seen only by his galoshes and rubber gloves, like kitchen gloves, so every creepy teacher we meet who would be a suspect ends up wearing these rubber gloves during their classes. Sometimes they even go the extra mile and have the adult branded “Suspect #1” or whatever. And there’s also a running body count. I’d say my main problem is they don’t make use of some of the most funny characters they introduce. There’s a blind black dude who has a car accident with a student in a wheelchair, fighting for the handicapped space. Or rather, it’s the blind dude’s dog, who was driving, that has the accident. But for the rest of the movie they’re a team, the wheelchair dude narrating what’s happening. These dudes are hilarious, but they are little more than glorified extras. The star of the movie, though, is the creepy janitor, Malvert. I say this in all kindness and with all respect, but Malvert is one fucked up looking dude. He’s super tall, super lanky, but maybe 100 pounds. In fact, the actor’s name is The Stick. That’s how he’s credited. He’s only done this one movie, but I think he could have been a star in the same way Michael Berryman was a horror icon.

He’s so awesome and I want to see him star in a film. His comedic timing is right on and he’s just so interesting to watch. His body moves differently than an average person and he’s just fascinating. Unfortunately, we’re left with the less interesting story of the Absintence poster-child Toby (Kristen Ritter) who figures out the killer is only going after teenagers who have sex, which happens everywhere around the school at any time. Hell, the next to die get it while trying to fuck at the funeral of the first two victims. Ritter’s not bad in the role, but her character just isn’t all that interesting and only seems to run into more interesting people… There’s the shop teacher obsessed with horse head bookends, the Biology teacher who hates frog dicks, the creepy principal, the cop on the case (who should have been played by Leslie Nielson… “I’ll cut right to the point. You’re the murderer.”) to name a few.

They also throw a lot of the random humor that I love so much out the window after the meowing, farting dog. Although we do get a death-by-eggplant, so I’m not left completely in the dark. Another negative is the lack of satire on the nudity and gore. There’s even a scene taking place in a girl’s lockerroom that you feel is obviously meant to satirize this very point, but the movie is PG for some damn reason. Now, I know the movie is rated R and they do that by stopping the film and having one of the producers come on to say that all their research has shown that R-rated horror out-perform PG horror, so with that in mind… “Fuck you.” And then we see the MPAA R-rating band… Okay, that’s funny… but seriously, if you’re going to send up slashers, you gotta have tits and gore. You have to. Final Thoughts: It gets negative points for the giant missed opportunity to go overboard on crazy, unrealistic gore, but ultimately I found myself enjoying the movie even though it is overloaded with more misses than hits. It’s easy to stand back now and see the stereotypes, but when this film was made there were only 2 Friday the 13th films that had been made and the full on slasher rip-off overload handn’t hit, so I have to give it some respect for noticing these patterns and formulas so early in the game. If it had been made better or at least gone whole hog into the bizarre humor then I think it could have been the AIRPLANE! for horror films. As it is now, it’s an interesting send-up, but nothing that’ll ever play for more than a select group of horror lovers.

Before I head off to Harry’s Halloween party, I must close out this HMAD run with my final of this week’s recommendations. If you’ve been paying attention, I’ve been pointing out some of my favorites of the genre that I feel are either underappreciated or overlooked. We’ve covered IN THE MOUTH OF MADNESS, SLEEPAWAY CAMP, DEMONS, DEMONS 2, WHO CAN KILL A CHILD? and now we have our final entry. This one is different from the others in that for some insane retarded reason it is not available on DVD, but you can find it on pretty heavy cable rotation still to this day and there are places you can look for laserdisc rips coughcoughebaycoughcough… Excuse me, I got something stuck in my finger-throats. I am talking, of course, of Fred Dekker’s masterpiece of ‘80s horror-comedy work NIGHT OF CREEPS.

I remember watching this as a kid and I was blown away immediately because it doesn’t start out like your average horror movie. We start this movie in space, jumping into the middle of a story already in progress. These little squat aliens are chasing another squat alien through the corridors of an Nostromo-like ship, firing lazer guns at him. The running alien is carrying a container and is able to eject it into space before he is captured. The thing falls to Earth in the ‘50s. The opening with the aliens is in color, but the ‘50s are in black and white as college kids make out. They see what they think is a meteor and like THE BLOB have to go investigate it. On the radio we hear of an escaped lunatic, so the girl is freaked out while her boyfriends leaves her in the car to go explore the meteor. Dekker cuts back and forth between these two as she anxiously waits in the car, listening to the news report and realizing she’s on the exact road they suspect the killer to be walking… sitting in a convertible, of course. The boyfriend finds the capsul in the woods, leans in for a closer look and a slug jumps out of the burning metal and into his surprised mouth.

Back in the car, we see the form of the hospial gown-clad lunatic carrying an ax slowely creeping up on the girl. She doesn’t notice him, but we do. The dude raises the ax high and swing it with full force. Just as it connects with the neck (in one shot… which I don’t have any idea how they did) they cut out of the intro and giving us our main setting. This same town, but in the ‘80s. The movie is so totally ‘80s, in all the best ways, just like REAL GENIUS is totally ‘80s in the best ways. Our heroes are two of the unlikeliest of the genre… geeks. One is a ginger named Chris Romero (Jason Lively) and the other is a handicapped smart-ass named JC Hooper (Steve Marshall). Yes, most people in this movie are named after famous horror directors. The lead girl is Cynthia Cronenberg (Jill Whitlow), the gruff cop is Det. Cameron (Tom Atkins), but there’s also a Landis, a Raimi, and the C of JC Hooper is Carpenter. But what’s great about this movie is that it’s not a horror spoof. It’s its own story and doesn’t fill the screen with winks and nudges in every frame. It’s not aping any other movie, but telling its own story. Basically, Jason Lively falls in love with Jill Whitlow… and that’s completely understandable. I’m totally in love with her, she falls completely into my ideal woman mode. She’s beautiful, but in a natural girl-next-door way, she’s kind, a little shy and can handle a flame-thrower. My ideal woman, in a nutshell. She’s in a sorority, so Lively thinks the only way he can stand a chance of being with this girl is if he’s accepted into a frat… run by her boyfriend Brad (Allan Kayser). They have no intention of letting in two dweebs, so they send them on an impossible task to gain admittance… that leads our two heroes to a science lab where they’re trying to find a corpse. They find one, alright. It’s the cryogenicly frozen ‘50s boyfriend who swallowed a slug. They try to steal him, but when he’s pulled out of the ice chamber he shows some life and they haul ass out of there. One thing leads to another and the ‘50s dude’s head splits open, spilling out a whole host of alien slugs, which begin to infest people turning them into zombies all leading to the climactic Prom Night.

Tom Atkins rocks the house in this movie. He’s a real tough ass and doesn’t take any shit. Sarcastic, mean… awesome badass who answers his phone “Thrill Me,” something I’ve been known to copy from time to time. The effects are great, the humor is fantastic, all the actors are perfect for their roles and Dekker’s smart script and hunger as a first time director really makes this a classic. And Dick Miller is in it, so case closed. NOW SOMEONE PUT IT ON DVD, GODDAMNIT!

Tomorrow we return to our regular AMAD line-up. We last left off with 1944’s noir LAURA starring the radiant Gene Tierney and we pick up on November 1st with another Gene Tierney film! Here’s the list for the first week of November! Saturday, November 1st: BLACK WIDOW (1954)

Sunday, November 2nd: THE GHOST AND MRS. MUIR (1947)

Monday, November 3rd: THE FLYING TIGERS (1942)

Tuesday, November 4th: EXECUTIVE ACTION (1973)

Wednesday, November 5th: THE BUSY BODY (1967)

Thursday, November 6th: IT’S A MAD, MAD, MAD, MAD WORLD (1963)

Friday, November 7th: LIBELED LADY (1936)


Previous Movies: June 2nd: Harper
June 3rd: The Drowning Pool
June 4th: Papillon
June 5th: Gun Crazy
June 6th: Never So Few
June 7th: A Hole In The Head
June 8th: Some Came Running
June 9th: Rio Bravo
June 10th: Point Blank
June 11th: Pocket Money
June 12th: Cool Hand Luke
June 13th: The Asphalt Jungle
June 14th: Clash By Night
June 15th: Scarlet Street
June 16th: Killer Bait (aka Too Late For Tears)
June 17th: Robinson Crusoe On Mars
June 18th: City For Conquest
June 19th: San Quentin
June 20th: 42nd Street
June 21st: Dames
June 22nd: Gold Diggers of 1935
June 23rd: Murder, My Sweet
June 24th: Born To Kill
June 25th: The Sound of Music
June 26th: Torn Curtain
June 27th: The Left Handed Gun
June 28th: Caligula
June 29th: The Elephant Man
June 30th: The Good Father
July 1st: Shock Treatment
July 2nd: Flashback
July 3rd: Klute
July 4th: On Golden Pond
July 5th: The Cowboys
July 6th: The Alamo
July 7th: Sands of Iwo Jima
July 8th: Wake of the Red Witch
July 9th: D.O.A.
July 10th: Shadow of A Doubt
July 11th: The Matchmaker
July 12th: The Black Hole
July 13th: Vengeance Is Mine
July 14th: Strange Invaders
July 15th: Sleuth
July 16th: Frenzy
July 17th: Kingdom of Heaven: The Director’s Cut
July 18th: Cadillac Man
July 19th: The Sure Thing
July 20th: Moving Violations
July 21st: Meatballs
July 22nd: Cast a Giant Shadow
July 23rd: Out of the Past
July 24th: The Big Steal
July 25th: Where Danger Lives
July 26th: Crossfire
July 27th: Ricco, The Mean Machine
July 28th: In Harm’s Way
July 29th: Firecreek
July 30th: The Cheyenne Social Club
July 31st: The Man Who Knew Too Much
August 1st: The Spirit of St. Louis
August 2nd: Von Ryan’s Express
August 3rd: Can-Can
August 4th: Desperate Characters
August 5th: The Possession of Joel Delaney
August 6th: Quackser Fortune Has A Cousin In The Bronx
August 7th: Start the Revolution Without Me
August 8th: Hell Is A City
August 9th: The Pied Piper
August 10th: Partners
August 11th: Barry Lyndon
August 12th: The Skull
August 13th: The Hellfire Club
August 14th: Blood of the Vampire
August 15th: Terror of the Tongs
August 16th: Pirates of Blood River
August 17th: The Devil-Ship Pirates
August 18th: Jess Franco’s Count Dracula
August 19th: Dracula A.D. 1972
August 20th: The Stranglers of Bombay
August 21st: Man, Woman & Child
August 22nd: The Little Girl Who Lives Down The Lane
August 23rd: The Young Philadelphians
August 24th: The Rack
August 25th: Until They Sail
August 26th: Somebody Up There Likes Me
August 27th: The Set-Up
August 28th: The Devil & Daniel Webster
August 29th: Cat People
August 30th: The Curse of the Cat People
August 31st: The 7th Victim
September 1st: The Ghost Ship
September 2nd: Isle of the Dead
September 3rd: Bedlam
September 4th: Black Sabbath
September 5th: Black Sunday
September 6th: Twitch of the Death Nerve
September 7th: Tragic Ceremony
September 8th: Lisa & The Devil
September 9th: Baron Blood
September 10th: A Shot In The Dark
September 11th: The Pink Panther
September 12th: The Return of the Pink Panther
September 13th: The Pink Panther Strikes Again
September 14th: Revenge of the Pink Panther
September 15th: Trail of the Pink Panther
September 16th: The Real Glory
September 17th: The Winning of Barbara Worth
September 18th: The Cowboy and the Lady
September 19th: Dakota
September 20th: Red River
September 21st: Terminal Station
September 22nd: The Search
September 23rd: Act of Violence
September 24th: Houdini
September 25th: Money From Home
September 26th: Papa’s Delicate Condition
September 27th: Dillinger
September 28th: Battle of the Bulge
September 29th: Daisy Kenyon
September 30th: Laura
October 1st: The Dunwich Horror
October 2nd: Experiment In Terror
October 3rd: The Devil’s Rain
October 4th: Race With The Devil
October 5th: Salo, Or The 120 Days of Sodom
October 6th: Bad Dreams
October 7th: The House Where Evil Dwells
October 8th: Memories of Murder
October 9th: The Hunger
October 10th: I Saw What You Did
October 11th: I Spit On Your Grave
October 12th: Naked You Die
October 13th: The Wraith
October 14th: Silent Night, Bloody Night
October 15th: I Bury The Living
October 16th: The Beast Must Die
October 17th: Hellgate
October 18th: He Knows You’re Alone
October 19th: The Thing From Another World
October 20th: The Fall of the House of Usher
October 21st: Audrey Rose
October 22nd: Who Slew Auntie Roo?
October 23rd: Wait Until Dark
October 24th: Dead & Buried
October 25th: A Bucket of Blood
October 26th: The Bloodstained Shadow
October 27th: I, Madman
October 28th: Return to Horror High
October 29th: Die, Monster, Die
October 30th: Epidemic

Readers Talkback
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  • Oct. 31, 2008, 7:51 p.m. CST

    Just saw It's a Mad World this week

    by rhcp2sweet

    Pretty funny movie, except for the fact that Ethel Merman is annoying as all hell in it.

  • Oct. 31, 2008, 8:14 p.m. CST

    You've never seen It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, World???????????

    by Vim Fuego

    Jesus Christ on a Bike! One of the funniest films ever. Every time I watch it, the music cue for the big "Dubya" gives me the shivers. Just don't try to compare it to "Rat Race" that's all.

  • Oct. 31, 2008, 8:19 p.m. CST

    Oh brother, Student Bodies was tough..

    by poydog

    to sit through. Sober. You're right on about Malvert though, dude is completely commited. Love it. Speaking of love, Night of the Creeps is UP there! For reals. One of an all time loves. Among which Trick 'R' Treat now belongs. And The Signal, coughcough. I have to recommend Hell High too, another favorite. Check it out if you can, tracked it down on ebay recently, looking for years. Happy Hallows to ALL!!!!!!!!!

  • Oct. 31, 2008, 8:44 p.m. CST

    Ditto, Vim Fuego!

    by theBigE

    I can't believe Quint hasn't seen it!

  • Oct. 31, 2008, 8:50 p.m. CST

    Madx4 World

    by pilotgrl

    Thanks for these AMADs, Quint. I'm enjoying them quite a bit. I don't think Mad, Mad...World is the funniest ever but it has fun moments and a great collection of classic comedians, if a bit long. Keep an eye out for a blink-and-you'll-miss-him Buster Keaton cameo.

  • Oct. 31, 2008, 8:54 p.m. CST

    RUSS? Oink, Oink, my good man!!!

    by James_O'Nasty

    Shoutout to Jason Lively, the BEST Rusty Griswold ever! (the protagonist of "Night of the Creeps")

  • Oct. 31, 2008, 8:56 p.m. CST

    The End of Student Bodies Gets Weird

    by FlyingGuillotine

    And actually kinda creeped me out a bit when I was a kid.

  • Oct. 31, 2008, 8:58 p.m. CST

    Thanks for the horror AMADs Quint!

    by IAmMrMonkey!

    Really enjoyed reading them and have got some new DVDs waiting to be watched now. I'm almost sad to be back to the normal AMADs, even though it's still one of the best columns on this website. Long live the Quint!

  • Oct. 31, 2008, 9:18 p.m. CST

    Ok this Shows my age, but I saw this in the 80's on Video.

    by Darth_Kaos

    I agree with you Quint. The first half of this movie was funny as hell. That scene in the girls locker room with the Breather POV always had me rolling.<br><br> I remember seeing this and a movie called UP THE ACADEMY. Which you should check out as well. It from the guys at MAD MAGAZINE when they were funny.

  • Oct. 31, 2008, 9:18 p.m. CST

    Thrill me.

    by The Reluctant Austinite

    I just brought in all the candy from the porch and I'm calling it a night. The trick-or-treating in our neighborhood is pretty slim these days, so any kid that came up to my house hit the mother load with candy and Halloween Play Doh. I had my laptop outside and watched "The Horror of Dracula" and "Abbot and Costello Meet Frankstien" until about 10 minutes after 9PM. Nine was usually about the time we started desperately looking for houses still giving out stuff when I was a kid, and ten was the nail in the coffin. I've had a few pumpkin ales and I'm starting to already get that sort of depressing feeling I get when some big event is over that you've been anticipating for a long while. This usually happens after Christmas and happened after I saw "Return of the King" at BNAT. It's over? Damn! And to make matters even worse, I don't really have anything better to do than write about on Talk Back on the internet. It's not even the witching hour yet. Well, I hope Harry's Halloween party is a blast. He's probably got John Carpenter at his house doing a live commentary to "Halloween" or something. Or Rick Baker in his kitchen doing make-ups for everybody. Oh well, for me it's going to be a couple more pumpkin ales and and then the usual trip to the pumpkin patch to hope HE shows up this year. Happy Halloween, AICN.

  • Oct. 31, 2008, 9:19 p.m. CST

    Best joke of the movie?

    by Anna Valerious

    The African exchange student who finally makes it to school on the last day of school. Because he drove. XD

  • Oct. 31, 2008, 9:40 p.m. CST

    Anybody else depressed

    by Sick Fixx

    now that October is over for another year?

  • Oct. 31, 2008, 9:43 p.m. CST

    "Why does it sound like you are talking through a rubber chicken

    by Darth_Nader

    "Because I am talking through a rubber chicken." To this day that is how I great one of my best friends when he calls me.

  • Oct. 31, 2008, 9:43 p.m. CST

    Goddamn that was a quick fucking month

    by I am_NOTREAL

    And can I just say, when it's Halloween, and you're the so-called Chiller channel, and the best you can do is the miniseries of The Tommyknockers, you fucking suck.

  • Oct. 31, 2008, 9:44 p.m. CST

    Fuck yeah, it's depressing

    by IAmMrMonkey!

    What is there after Halloween but a slow crawl of credit card debts, hunts for obscure presents and increasing stress about Christmas. And then, before you know it, it's flippin' January, it's 2009, you realise you've just wasted another year doing the same thing you did the year before, you're completely broke because of all the money you spent on presents and the New Year where you spent three times as much as you normally would on a night out and now you're back at work.<p>Fuck yeah. No wonder more people kill themselves at this time of year.

  • Oct. 31, 2008, 9:58 p.m. CST

    The Halloween Blues

    by The Reluctant Austinite

    I hear you guys. I think the thing is this: Summer is pretty cool and there's lots of fun things to do. The Summer movies come fast and furious. Then Fall arrives, the weather is nice and the whole month leading to Halloween is a blast (or at least a nice distraction from school/work/bills, etc.) But right after Halloween all you've got to look forward to is four months of nasty cold and icey rain until Spring. Christmas is nice, but has become so commercialized that it's more pressure than it is fun. The Holiday movie season is short and mostly focused on either cheesy kids/ family films or Oscar contenders. I love Halloween, but it starts to suck quickly when it's over each year.

  • Oct. 31, 2008, 10:05 p.m. CST

    UK Horror Fans PLEASE don't miss...


    ...DEAD SET. I just watched the fifth and final episode of the E4 (UK digital channel) Halloween special "Dead Set" and it was absolutely brilliant, unmissable stuff. An almost inevitable zombie apocalypse breaks out and the only safe(ish) place left is inside the security compound housing the UK "Big Brother" house. As the undead hoard surrounds the place, the total a**hole show producer and his put-upon assistant enter the house, only to find the thick as f**k contestants think it's all part of a test... Don't let the BB connection put you off. It's really f**king gory (there's a death-by-fire-extinguisher scene that is far worse than similar ones in IRREVERSABLE or PANS LABYRINTH), but it's also funny as f**k, being written by Charlie (TV Go Home) Brooker and featuring real former BB contestants as parts of the zombie hoard. Davina McCall's [i]first[/i] death scene around a ½ hour in is worth watching for that alone. She's very [i]limber[/i]. The whole thing is going to be shown again as a single feature length special tomorrow (Sat 1st Nov) night and I can't recommend it enough to any horror OR "Big Brother" fan (same difference, surely?)

  • Oct. 31, 2008, 10:05 p.m. CST


    That is all.

  • Oct. 31, 2008, 10:34 p.m. CST

    Horsehead Bookends!

    by Big Bad Clone

    My drama teacher in HS was in this movie (her only role in anything released according to imdb). It was funny how proud she was of this fact until she found out one of her students (me) had actually seen the movie. After that, she'd only mention it half-embarassed.

  • Oct. 31, 2008, 10:37 p.m. CST

    JIMBOCOP is Charlie Brooker

    by IAmMrMonkey!

    I'm onto you "JIMBOCOP".

  • Oct. 31, 2008, 11 p.m. CST

    I am sooooo busted!


    NOT! (;))

  • Oct. 31, 2008, 11:07 p.m. CST

    one of my favorites--

    by dahauk--

    So many memorable lines/moments---the breather/killer running his hand over all the killing instruments only the stop with glee at=paper clips! 'Sometimes Melvert pee red..'while whizzing into a bucket in the might not laugh at every gag, but they keep throwing them at you with regularity anyway. This came out when parody films were rare if not unheard of, so give them props for that.

  • Oct. 31, 2008, 11:39 p.m. CST


    by Series7

    Damnit someone beat me. This movie rules. Much better then scary movie. <P> -----> Door unlocked.

  • Oct. 31, 2008, 11:47 p.m. CST

    last nite was the 70th anniversary of welle's

    by bacci40

    war of the can be argued that no piece of scifi has had more of an impact on popular culture than that radio program...welle's a genius, a man ahead of his time

  • Oct. 31, 2008, 11:50 p.m. CST

    Night of the Creeps is a favorite

    by Jarek

    Have loved that one for years. Got lucky enough to see it on the big screen from a 35mm print last year at a revival screening in Toronto (with Dekkar in attendance)... great little flick, and Slither owes a lot to it.

  • Nov. 1, 2008, 12:11 a.m. CST

    Oh man...Student Bodies

    by Munkstomper

    Student Bodies should be shown to film students on how to have a great movie hit a brick wall at the end. I LOVED this was perfect, it was brilliant...then the ending. Oh man, that ending just completely killed my love for this movie. It was like they had this incredible idea and didn't know how to end it. I will always have a soft spot for "Student Bodies". What a could have been epic.

  • Nov. 1, 2008, 1:32 a.m. CST

    Well done, sir.

    by 24200124

    I applaud your efforts during this month and this last week's double-review buildup to Halloween. Wonderful stuff, man. Thank you for this.

  • Nov. 1, 2008, 2:38 a.m. CST

    "Go ahead...thrill me.."

    by sonnyfern

    Bow down to Atkins...

  • Nov. 1, 2008, 5:54 a.m. CST

    Carpenter doesn't get his own character?

    by NoodlesHahn

    He has to piggy back on Hooper?

  • Nov. 1, 2008, 6:21 a.m. CST

    German title of Student Bodies:

    by DerLanghaarige

    "What's the dead man doing on the clothesline?" One of my favourite movie titles ever. :D

  • Nov. 1, 2008, 6:44 a.m. CST

    Jill Whitlow

    by YeahSureWhatever


  • Nov. 1, 2008, 7:53 a.m. CST

    Malvert pee red

    by cornponious

    Best line. <p> Ever.

  • Nov. 1, 2008, 8:16 a.m. CST

    Quint, you still suck at writing

    by Bilblow

    But this is a good exercise for you. Keep practice.

  • Nov. 1, 2008, 9:14 a.m. CST

    I saw "Student Bodies"

    by Drunken Rage

  • Nov. 1, 2008, 9:16 a.m. CST

    by Drunken Rage

    at the theatre; I read somewhere that it was directed by Michael Ritchie, a director I liked, but who was so pissed off with the movie he had his name taken off the credits. It's not very good but at least it's better than "Saturday the 14th" which is nearly unwatchable.

  • Nov. 1, 2008, 10:07 a.m. CST


    by buffywrestling

    I really enjoyed October's run, And to close it out on "Student Bodies" - well, that's just icing, baby. Thanks Quint.

  • Nov. 1, 2008, 10:15 a.m. CST

    Back to regular AMAD

    by Grammaton Cleric Binks

    Quint is hardcore.

  • Nov. 1, 2008, 12:08 p.m. CST

    I said....

    by Jason B. Swaim

  • Nov. 1, 2008, 1:35 p.m. CST


    by tonagan

    All they sell are baby supplies. I saw no mention of Night of the Creeps.

  • Nov. 1, 2008, 2:35 p.m. CST

    I'm taking it out...I'm doing the thing mother told me not to do

    by darquelyte

    I'll always have a special place for Student Bodies. Back in high school, we'd watch it at the Halloween party each year. It wasn't even available on video back then. Someone had taped it from On Tv, an early and long defunct pay network. It has some good ideas and good lines, (Hmm, Chicken...hmm, broken...hmm,) but ultimately just falls apart. I'd love to see someone remake this and finish the job properly. Especially if they could find "The Stick" aka Malvert. That guy ruled.

  • Nov. 1, 2008, 2:52 p.m. CST

    I guess I'll check back into this column next October.

    by Zombieflicker

    I'm not a classic movie buff. I really enjoyed this column this past month though. Maybe someone should do a "horror/sci-fi movie of the day" column.

  • Nov. 1, 2008, 4:13 p.m. CST

    I always thought the best slasher parody...

    by Continentalop

    Was Slumper Party Massacre. It spoofs and sends up all the cliches while at the same time operating as a decent slasher flick. Plus, it does the best send up of horror films gratutious nude shower scenes by having a very gratutious nude shower scene.

  • Nov. 1, 2008, 6:42 p.m. CST

    Night of the Creeps!

    by Jawa 007

    Always gotta give props to that movie. An all time great one for me.

  • Nov. 1, 2008, 6:52 p.m. CST

    Just want to say...


    Kudos to Quint for the AMAD and the October run in particular. Top marks sir! That is all.

  • Nov. 1, 2008, 9 p.m. CST

    Drunken Rage

    by caruso_stalker217

    As shitty as SATURDAY THE 14TH is, the sequel is much much worse. <p>Oh Christ, was it terrible...

  • Nov. 1, 2008, 10:44 p.m. CST

    night of the creeps---

    by dahauk--

    --the movie has two endings, with or without the spaceship over the graveyard. also a fun movie..

  • Nov. 2, 2008, 12:50 a.m. CST

    you know what pisses me off?

    by GavinVanDraven

    Spider-Man 3. the moment when the meteor carrying the alien symbiote landed a few yards away from pete and mj. the blob and night of the creeps immediately came to mind. slither also.... that just sad. and weak, considering spidey 2 had the whole "jj jamison jr is an astronaut thing" going for it. wtf?

  • Nov. 2, 2008, 12:53 a.m. CST


    by GavinVanDraven

    the janitor cracks me up. i showed my vhs copy of NOTC to a buddy of mine a few years back... and we always use that line in conversation....SCREAMING LIKE BANSHEES! (in a very racist asian voice no less) fuck! when do we get a DVD? this is one of those real gems from the 80's... and we need a dvd and bluray release already!

  • Nov. 2, 2008, 1:13 a.m. CST

    This is garbage

    by HereAgain

    I just watched a bit on YouTube. It looks like it was filmed by high school students, and the "humor" is moronic.

  • Nov. 2, 2008, 1:33 a.m. CST


    by jcrash

    Did you hang up? No, I just said "click" Hilariously stupid movie. I loved it in high school, I have no idea if I'd still find it funny, but now I'll have to go rent it and find out. Thanks for reminding me of this blast form the past.

  • Nov. 2, 2008, 10:49 a.m. CST

    The Funniest Scene in Mad, Mad World...

    by Admiral Nelson the entire sequence involving Jonathan Winters and Phil Silver, where the slimy Silver has Winters locked up in a gas station with 2 nebbishy attendants convinced Winters is a crazy escaped lunatic. When Winters breaks free and destroys the entire place with his bare hands (like the Incredible Hulk), I thought I was going to have a heart attack from laughing. (Then again, I first saw this movie when I was 12, but I still think it's funny as hell.) A lot of people think the film's over the top (and it does lose steam once they find the money), but for me, this film has scenes of pure genius. (And Dick Shawn's first scene with his bikini-clad dancing girlfriend is freaking HILARIOUS.)

  • Nov. 2, 2008, 10:53 a.m. CST

    Note: that should be "Phil Silvers"

    by Admiral Nelson

  • Nov. 2, 2008, 10:46 p.m. CST

    Why'd I have to pick a jogger?

    by Domi'sInnerChild

    The Breather is the greatest horror comedy villian of all time. Then again, I'm sure that movie has aged horribly. But I did love it on HBO. Come on, the body count went up 1/2 when a fly was killed.

  • Nov. 2, 2008, 11:18 p.m. CST

    What's a 'lazer'?

    by BiggusDickus it anything like a 'laser'?<p>Yours pedantically...

  • Nov. 3, 2008, 9:07 a.m. CST

    Horsehead bookends.

    by fireclown

    That is all. I love student bodies. Good call.

  • Nov. 3, 2008, 4:50 p.m. CST

    Best Scene Was....

    by Craig2574

    When the lead character said she would not kill a fly. Than she did and the body count went up by 1/2.

  • Nov. 10, 2008, 8:36 a.m. CST

    I saw a tiny bit of Student Bodies on the movie channels once...

    by The Amazing G

    I didn't like it, but maybe I'll give it another chance