Hey, everyone. “Moriarty” here.

I'm in London, it's just after 8:14 in the morning, and I have to go shower and get ready to head to the set of KICK-ASS for today. All very last minute. But before I run out the door, there's an e-mail from a spy who makes a very persuasive case that there is indeed a director onboard now for the CONAN project that Lionsgate has been developing.

And if this is true, then my interest level just went through the floor. That’s sort of incredible, too, because I’m a full-blown CONAN freak. When I met Howard McCain after the screening of OUTLANDER, he told me he’d just been hired with his writing partner to write CONAN for Lionsgate, and in talking with him, I could tell the material was in the right hands. He genuinely adores the Robert Howard stories, and it seemed like he had some big plans for how to structure the film.

And let’s be clear... stop calling this a remake. They’re not doing the Milius film. They’re starting over from the original stories. So it’s relly wrong to call this thing a remake at all. You won’t be seeing the same story or even the same supporting characters. This is ground zero.

And now it appears to be official that Brett Ratner is directing the goddamn thing.

Oh, Brett... why do you want to hurt me? Why do you want to make this movie? Please, please, please tell me it’s because you have a genuine passion for the material and not just because it’s a start date and a financing package that’s ready to go. Please tell me that you really care about the character and its history, and not that it’s just “Hey, I recognize that name.”

I’d love to be wrong about this. I don’t think Ratner’s a terrible shooter, and maybe this script is bulletproof.

I’d love to find out. Hint. Hint. Anyone who felt like putting a copy in my hands should feel free to do so.

In the meantime, I’m going to do my best to keep positive and pray that this is a good thing for the material and not a death sentence. I believe in CONAN... and I hope like hell that Ratner does, too.

Thanks for the heads-up, Gilgamesh.

Drew McWeeny, Los Angeles