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Okay, LA Film Geeks… You’ve Got To Get To The New Beverly Tonight!
Hey, everyone. “Moriarty” here.
I ran a piece last week about the Patton Oswalt-programmed festival that is now running at the New Beverly, and I hope some of you made it out for the first few double-features. CHARLEY VARRICK and THE TAKING OF PELHAM 1-2-3 were like a badass sammich served up hot, and noir enthusiasts would have been in heaven with THE LINE-UP and BLAST OF SILENCE.
Tonight, though, Patton’s doing something that no one’s done at the celebrity programming events at the New Beverly so far: he’s premiering a film. And it’s a film that, frankly, you may never get a chance to see theatrically again. That’s worth a trip to the theater, especially if you know just how cool Patton’s film taste is overall.
The evening will start at 7:30 with AMERICAN MOVIE, that awesome documentary about the makers of COVEN, a low-budget horror film, and then at 9:40, he’s going to show Bobby Hacker’s CARS III.
“Wait... what the hell were CARS I and CARS II?” you ask.
Glad you asked. Here’s CARS I for you:
Okay! My fucking checkbook’s out! I swear!
And here’s the sequel, CARS II:
You’ll notice both of these run less than two minutes long. So I’m curious to see what he’s going to do with
something that runs about 40 times longer. Here’s a trailer for CARS III, which appears to be the culmination of everything Bobby Hacker’s been working toward so far:
Come on. That looks totally fucking serious. Serious as a hate crime. It even says so right there in the trailer.
Don’t be a dick. Show up tonight for what could be the only theatrical screening of this film. Support truly independent cinema and one of the only truly independent theaters in Los Angeles.
As Patton said, “How can you afford to miss this? It's only 40 minutes long, and Bobby will be there to defend/explain.”
Drew McWeeny, Los Angeles
Drew McWeeny, Los Angeles
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Oh yeah.
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YOU PUT THE POISON IN ME!!!! is my favorite line of his.
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...are not funny. At all.
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I would do my own film festival! But at the moment I don't even have enough money to scratch my ass.
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is fantastic. A really great documentary.
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...that's not the least bit cool unless someone who's already cool says it's cool. I was done with that routine around age 14.
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I thought I should mention this before the question pops up in this talkback too.
Come on, you call yourself geeks and can't recognize one of the most memorable scenes of every every Carpenter movie? -
...are kind of funny, but they couldn't be more Tim & Eric (only not as good) if they tried.
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Makes me almost wish I lived in LA and not Austin...almost.
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is quite funny. I guess growing up in the midwest and moving to LA to get away from people like in the show, I 'get' it.
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from Prince of Darkness - "We are transmitting form the year 199..."
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He cut me off as I was trying to get in the turn lane onto Highland from Melrose. Goddamn piece of shit manlet.
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Oct 08, 2008 3:53:16 PM CDT
Aw, DAMN. I've got a haircut scheduled after work tonight!
by speed fricassee
Guess I'll have to learn to live with myself after missing out on this astonishing opportunity.
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Kinda reminds me of Mega 64. Get out your fucking checkbook guy even looks a little like one of the Mega 64 guys.
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I am so glad I'm not the only one who instantly recognized that thing. It's only a frickin' creepy as hell sequence from one of the better zero-budget horror flicks of that era. Not to mention that every J-horror flick worth a Hollywood remake has copied the vibe from that very fucking sequence!
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Tim & Eric are actually funny, though. Fuck this. I could be at the Beverly tonight, but I think I'll try to get a haircut, too.
...and Wonder Showzen did the hate crime thing, to much better effect ("White Wine, White Women, and Hate Crimes! *high five* -
http://tinyurl.com/5yukb2
...and it sucks, too!
I hope this means no Patton Oswalt in Tim and Eric season 4. Go back to CBS sitcoms, you unfunny dolt. -
is older than tim and eric.
all slacker video humor is the same, tim and eric didn't invent it. -
Cars - uploaded 5/31/07
Tim & Eric Awesome Show, Great Job! - premiered 2/11/07...and this does not take into account their Tom Goes to the Mayor, which had been airing since 2004, and covering similiar material.
Yeah, I know Tim and Eric didn't invent lulz, but I stand by the assertion that this Cars shid is trying to be them, and doing it wrong. -
From the movie... if anybody was wondering. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6XnPKi8528U
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the stupids of america love him...
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this site has gone to shit when it covers stuff like this, script girl is more credible then a a guy making a 40 minute movie out of a 1 minute you tube skit
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I wish I could be there with my fucking checkbook out. I'm betting Damon Packard either knows these guys, or he'll be there sitting in the back row.
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Those were some amazing basketball moves.
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And I'm not one to say another man's art isn't valid- nevertheless, this is deranged bullshit. This guy should seek therapy. Or, if this is his therapy, good for him. But I'm not watching anymore of it.
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Seriously scary guy
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The stupids of America are mercilessly mocked by Patton Oswalt and wouldn't understand most of what he says unless they came to his shows equipped with a a thesaurus, a Wizard price guide and the back catalog of Starlog. Go give a listen to Werewolves and Lollipops before you make anymore idiotic comments. By the way it's Osawlt, not Oswald.
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I will be avoiding Cars 3 like the plague. Cars 1 and 2 couldn't be less funny and were both way too long at just a minute and a half.
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They get crowded with every dickweed and his uncle instead of people who ACTUALLY LIKE THIS SHIT. Please STOP STOP STOP. Every fucking revival cinema event in Los Angeles is turning into a douchey American Apparel hipster party zone. Please leave a free-range zone for old-school actual dorks!
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