Comics

AICN COMICS REVIEWS SUPERMAN! OBAMA! HULK! MCCAIN! LEGEND OF ZELDA! & MUCH MORE!

Published at: Oct. 1, 2008, 7:28 a.m. CST by ambush bug

#20 9/24/08 #7

The Pull List (Click title to go directly to the review) PRESIDENTIAL MATERIAL: BARACK OBAMA #1 & JOHN MCCAIN #1 SUPERMAN #680 HULK #6 FABLES #76 M-THEORY #1 Big Eyes For the Cape Guy presents THE LEGEND OF ZELDA – OCARINA OF TIME Indie Jones presents… CHEAP SHOTS!

PRESIDENTIAL MATERIAL: BARACK OBAMA #1

Writer: Jeff Mariotte Artist: Tom Morgan

PRESIDENTIAL MATERIAL: JOHN MCCAIN #1

Writer: Andy Helfer Art: Stephen Thompson Publisher: IDW Publishing Crossing the party lines: Ambush Bug

I wouldn’t say I’m a political man. You won’t see any hate filled rants seething about the liberal agenda or any sanctimonious finger pointing towards the conservative right from this Bug. I tend to lean more towards anarchy myself, and know deep within my heart of hearts that sooner or later, everyone will smarten up and realize that all disagreements can and should be resolved in the most intelligent and fitting manner…Thunderdome, of course. So don’t go expecting some kind of political slant or bias when it comes to the reviews of these two comic book biographies. I simply don’t care enough to lean either way.
But with the election year coming up, I was extremely interested to see what new propaganda the two parties would use to get their word out to the kiddies. With Rock the Vote turning out to be an utter failure to reach younger voters in the last election, looks as if new tactics are being administered. Now, since the average age of comic book reviewers these days is between the mid-twenties and early thirties, it’s not exactly addressing those key slacker voters that Michael Moore was trying to reach, but it’s a step in the right direction. I think a presidential Wii game or some way to tie in GUITAR HERO to the voting booth would probably be most effective in bringing in the youth vote, but good for IDW for trying something new here.
Are these books good?
Well, this isn’t really the graphic storytelling version of each candidate’s views, policies and plans for the nation. Although interesting and important, a 22 page step by step description of Barack’s Health Care plan or McCain’s intricate outline of plans for off-shore drilling isn’t exactly what I call page-turner material. These books are a set of biographies telling us about each candidate’s long road to becoming the Big Two candidates in this year’s presidential election. The cool thing is that, this year, we do have a pair of candidates that have some very compelling backstories.
Having a compelling backstory and telling it in an interesting way in comic book form, though, are two different things altogether. No doubt, both of these men have done some fine and noble things, but if the books’ writers forget that they are trying to write a compelling story, the results are less than interesting. That’s kind of the case here.
Let’s look at BARACK OBAMA’s book first. I would categorize this book as firmly seated in the drama category. There’s a lot of personal struggle going on in this book. Obama’s conflicts with race, prejudice, class, and family are highlighted and dissected. Obama is depicted as a man fighting against the odds and overcoming them. It’s an inspirational story and Obama is definitely shown in a compelling and sympathetic light. Obama’s views on various issues do get some screen time towards the end of this book as Obama’s rise in power and recognition bring us to his current status, but the main focus of this book seems to be that Obama has overcome a lot to get where he is and that he’s a man of the people. In that light, it’s a successful effort.
JOHN MCCAIN’s book is successful in telling his story too. Yet another drama, but at least this one has a bit of the kind of action that comic book readers are used to. Say what you will about McCain’s views, his story is a riveting one and this book highlights McCain’s love for America, his maverick stances that separated him from the rest of his party, and his will to survive and fight for what he believes in. McCain’s platform is also described to some extent towards the end of this book, but again, the focus is on what brought McCain to the top Republican presidential candidate spot rather than his views.
My biggest problem with these biographies was that they fall short of utilizing the medium to its fullest potential in order to speak to the reader. Now, I don’t want to see Obama sporting an open yellow shirt and exclaiming “Sweet Christmas!” or McCain lobbing grenades whilst clenching a knife between his teeth, but since it is a comic book audience that is being addressed here, the stories could have been punched up a bit to make for more compelling reads--stories that would address the audience (comic book readers) in the language that they know (vivid, bold strokes storytelling). Instead, we get a whole lotta captions going on. Both book rely heavily on already published material and often say so in the captions. It’s your typical faux pas of telling the reader the story rather than doing the more enjoyable thing and showing the reader how the story goes. Granted, there was a lot of history to tell in these two books and 22 pages doesn’t really give a writer a chance to detail the dramatic beats of the candidates’ lives very much. But looking at a page and seeing more captions than art is a no-no in any comic.
The artists chosen for these books did a capable job of drawing Obama, McCain, and other key political figures. All of them are instantly recognizable and there’s something admirable about that kind of craftsmanship. But it’s pretty much straight forward storytelling with little by way of creative panel work. If as much attention was paid to making the panels visually appealing as there was to making the characters look accurate, this would have been a much more interesting read.
These two books were successful in highlighting the strengths of each of the candidates. Like I said, they both have compelling stories and no matter how one leans, one must concede that this is one of the most interesting elections in years. The comic successfully shows that, in many ways, Obama and McCain’s origin stories (these are comics, so I’m using the terms, folks) are similar in that they are both men who went against the odds and never gave up, even when all seemed to be lost. In that, both men are worthy of my respect and both books, worthy of purchase. I also wanted to add that even though both books clearly favor the candidates that star in them, little by way of mudslinging occurs. I’ve gotta commend IDW for that. This could easily have been a case where a comic book company writes two books about two candidates but from the same political viewpoint, making one look worse than the other. But other than the covers by J. Scott Campbell which depicts Obama in a more favorable heroic pose and McCain as someone who may come into your house at night and eat your baby, the stories inside to a commendable job of showing both parties in a favorable and non-biased light.
I doubt these books will convert any of you to vote one way or the other, but they do a fine job of telling the candidates’ inspirational stories and viewpoints. Had a bit more time been spent utilizing the medium of comics more efficiently, the results could have been more satisfying. Nevertheless, IDW deserves credit for trying something bold and new here.
Ambush Bug is Mark L. Miller, reviewer and co-editor of AICN Comics for over seven years. Check out a five page preview of his short story published in MUSCLES & FIGHTS 3 (AVAILABLE NOW at Muscles & Fights.com.) on his ComicSpace page. Bug was recently interviewed here and here at Cream City Comics about indie comics, his own artistic process, the comics industry, and other shades of bullsquat. Look for Bug’s follow-up this Fall in MUSCLES & FRIGHTS!

SUPERMAN #680

Written by: James Robinson Pencilled by: Renato Guedes Published by: DC Comics Reviewed by: BottleImp

Well, congratulations, DC. You did it. You finally killed this title for me.
The blame can be spread around for this, so let’s start with James Robinson. Here’s a guy who wrote STARMAN (one of my all-time favorite series), helped make the Justice Society cool again, wrote the amazing GOLDEN AGE miniseries, WITCHCRAFT, LEAVE IT TO CHANCE, and other incredible comics that I can’t think of at the moment. Yet he also wrote the screenplay for the abysmal LEAGUE OF EXTRAORDINARY GENTLEMEN movie. And unfortunately, Robinson’s writing on SUPERMAN feels a lot more like his film work than it does his previous comic book scripting. I don’t know what happened during the time that Robinson was taking a break from comics to work in Hollywood, but whatever it was, it wasn’t good. His writing—particularly the dialogue—has what I call “Claremont Syndrome.” Much like Chris Claremont’s later writing on X-MEN (we’re talking late ‘80s early ‘90s), every character that Robinson writes ends up sounding the same—everyone talks or thinks in broken incomplete sentences, everyone seems to think along the same lines and use the same sort of language, and everyone has the same personality. I mentioned in a review of a previous issue that the characters were written with Jack Knight-kind of narrative captions, but now they all sound more like the Shade—even Superman. And readers familiar with the STARMAN series KNOW that there is no way in hell that Superman should even remotely resemble the Shade.
If I may, I’d like to make a comparison to Bryan Singer’s SUPERMAN RETURNS. Whether you love it, like it or hate it, you have to admit that Singer’s heart was in the right place when he made that film. You may not agree with the aspects of Superman that Singer chose to focus on or the manner in which he developed his view of Superman, but at least you can see a clear vision of what Singer was trying to do with the character. I’m one of those people who liked the film more than I thought I would. Though I think Singer might have been more successful if he had chosen to forge a new path for Superman rather than returning to Richard Donner’s vision, I couldn’t help but smile as the shivers ran up my back when I heard that oh-so-familiar John Williams theme.
But when I read SUPERMAN, there’s no music here. And I think it’s because James Robinson DOESN’T have his heart in the right place. I can’t see Robinson’s vision for the character, and I think that’s because he doesn’t have one. As I wrote before, Robinson seemed much more interested in exploring the character of Atlas than he did Superman.
But blame for this lackluster series has to be shared with DC—specifically, with the editors of all the Superman titles. Maybe Robinson would be able to develop a more personal vision for the character if he were not bound by the dictates of editorial direction. The last straw for me in regards to this title was that the entire Atlas/mysterious government agent storyline would be continued not in the SUPERMAN series, but in SUPERMAN’S PAL JIMMY OLSEN SPECIAL #1. Now I don’t know about you, but when I read a storyline over a period of four consecutive issues, I expect the plot to be resolved within the series—not shuffled over to a one-shot to wrap up all the dangling threads. But I’m guessing that since all the Superman books will be engaging in the “New Krypton” crossover, Robinson’s Atlas plot had to be shunted so that his title could be in step with ACTION and SUPERGIRL. But whatever the reason, it ended up leaving me with a bad taste in my mouth. I’m not interested enough to pick up the JIMMY OLSEN SPECIAL, and I’ve certainly lost all interest in SUPERMAN.
I do have to point out a positive note about Renato Guedes’ art: much as I hate that they brought back Krypto the Superdog (a cute concept that I have no doubt will quickly get annoying and before too long Krypto will be given the Old Yeller treatment), Guedes draws him extraordinarily well. I’ve found that a lot of “realistic” comic book artists tend to fudge it when it comes to animals; we usually wind up with either cartoony or vaguely anthropomorphic dogs, cats and monkeys. But Guedes has obviously done his homework. Good job, Guedes… sorry that all that work went into what turned out to be such a crappy, half-assed storyline.
When released from his Bottle, the Imp takes the form of Stephen Andrade, an artist/illustrator/pirate monkey painter from the Northeast who's given up comics more times than he can remember. But every time he thinks he's out, they pull him back in.

HULK #6

Written by: Jeph Loeb Art by: Ed McGuinness and Dexter Vines Published by: Marvel Comics Reviewed by: Ryan McLelland

So here’s the end of a story-arc with Red Hulk battling Green Hulk. Right from the get-go we have two different covers that fit together to have these massive behemoths fighting which has a really great effect. How does the story match up? Will Red Hulk win? Will we learn the identity of Rulk? Will Rick Jones still be the atrocious A-Bomb?
Hulk and A-Bomb are in San Francisco checking out the nightlife and Iron Man, Ares, Thing, and a slew of others are trying to convince Hulk to fight Rulk. Hulk hate Rulk so Hulk go to fight Rulk. Nothing better than a comic book full of monosyllables. Hulk is able to use his Spidey-Sen, er, Hulk Tracking Beam to zone right in on Rulk, with A-Bomb using the same technique to follow Hulk. They both find Rulk and…
FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! Oh yeah the fight is on with Hulk and Rulk going at it blow-for-blow. The much smarter Rulk taunts his little green friend and it’s a match up between the guy who gets stronger as he gets angrier and the guy who gets hotter as he gets angrier. I’m sure you all know who wins and I’m sure you all think you find out who Rulk really is. Do you? Well, read the issue and find out.
Jeph Loeb and Ed McGuinness continue their Rulk fun, and it certainly ends a terrific story arc. Personally I can’t wait until the next issue when Art Adams and Frank Cho jump aboard, but McGuinness can sure draw his Hulks well. I’m not a big fan of dumb Hulk by any means and the whole ‘Me Hulk, You Betty’ thing wears on me pretty quick. Luckily Rulk isn’t dumb and is sort of a prick so it all balances nicely. HULK #6 is a great ending to the arc and hopefully Rulk continues to be a Marvel Universe menace for many years to come.
Ryan McLelland has worked in movies and comics journalism for the past several years before joining the @$$holes here at AICN. Ryan’s comic work has already graced comic shelves with Arcana’s PHILLY, WISE INTELLIGENCE, UPTOWN GIRL, and THE SENTINELS ANTHOLOGY. He rarely updates his blog but when he does it can be read at www.eyewannabe.com

FABLES #76

Writer: Bill Willingham Artist: Mike Allred Publisher: DC Vertigo Reviewer: Optimous Douche

Most reviewers will tell you that issue 76 is a wonderful jumping on point for new readers. Excuse me while I emphatically say, screw that. Yes, this is the first issue after the epically long 75 issue war between Fabletown and the Homelands. Yes, this is truly a brand new day for the book’s direction as long time fans wonder “what’s next?” But make no mistake, if you are new to FABLES, you would be doing yourself a grave disservice in ignoring what has already passed. Sure you can start now, but you will have missed what up until this point has been one of the best damn series ever written.
To truly appreciate issue 76, I want you to play a little game of “What If?” with me. This should be an easy “exercise of the imagination” for the true believers of comic fandom. Imagine if you will on April 30, 1945, instead of finding the smoky charred remains of Hitler’s splattered skull and Ava Braun’s cyanide frothing pie hole, the Soviet forces instead found the two sitting contently in Hitler’s bunker as he gently hummed Adel Veis while getting a “good try honey” blowjob from Ava. Now imagine that one of the conditions of the peace treaty between the Axis and Allied forces was that Hitler would have to spend the rest of his days living penniless in downtown Jerusalem (I know Israel wasn’t a state yet, but as I said use your imagination). Would he be able to ever walk down the street without a cadre of bodyguards? Would he ever be able to order a falafel or blintzes, without them being spit in, assuming he could even get served? Perfect: now you are in the right frame of mind for the events of the first post-war issue of FABLES.
I’ve always applauded Willingham for making Gepetto the dark overlord of the forces that conquered the Fables’ Homeworlds. I squealed with glee when his identity was revealed and it was discovered that he gained all of his power by siphoning it from the Blue Fairy, trapped S&M style in his cupboard. One of the other things that made Gepetto so damn compelling was his belief that his actions were right and just. The best villains are not the moustache twirling mwahahaha types, but rather the ones that have salient arguments for their debauchery no matter how nefarious their misdeeds actually are.
After signing the war treaty last issue, Gepetto is now a full-time resident of the Fable ghetto in New York City. On the surface this issue is simply a tour of Gepetto’s new surroundings, guided by his ever dutiful son Pinocchio. But that’s the easy Cliff Notes synopsis. In actuality this is an exploration of whether there truly is a winner when it comes to war. While fans of the book cheered with every advance made by the Fabletown forces into the Homeworlds, Gepetto despite being a cantankerous cockmeister actually makes the people he runs into question whether liberation was worth the mass casualties and subsequent unrest that the Homeworlds now inevitably face. Hmmmm, this all sounds vaguely familiar, I wonder why?
Aside from running parallels to America’s turmoil in the Middle East there were some classic lines spewed out by the evil one on the trappings and foibles of modern society. Everything from the inane chatter we can all partake in thanks to cell phones to New York’s endless traffic was fair game for Gepetto’s douchebaggery. And for a minute you actually begin to believe that the old codger might not be too far off his rocker, even though his heart is a festering cesspool of evil intent.
I’m still grappling as to whether I like the choice of Mike Allred coming in as a guest penciler. I loved Allred’s work on X STATIX. His clean 60’s style lines were a damn humorous juxtaposition for the modern ultra-violence that ran through that title. With FABLES, though, I’m just not sure if his style works. Buckingham’s dewy, deeply shaded lines always helped immerse the reader deeper into this fantasy world. I also always loved the way Buckingham drew Pinocchio like a carnival dwarf as opposed to a real child. I’m on the fence because if this is in fact a new direction for the book, the art certainly helped solidify that this is not your Father’s FABLES. But when I first saw Beast and he looked exactly like 90% of Allred’s other thirty-something males it ripped away my willing suspension of disbelief. An admirable job for a guest shot, I’m just not sure I want to see Mike on this book as a staple.
Great issue, great new direction, and let’s just hope there are plenty more storms over the horizon for Grimm’s brain children.

M-THEORY #1

Written by: Dwight MacPherson & Bruce Brown Art by: Mike Barentine Published by: Image Comics Reviewed by: Ryan McLelland

M-THEORY #1 is an amazing, fully welcomed change of pace from your average Image book. It’s “-Files” meets “Buck Rogers” meets “Space Quest” set in the very early fifties. The era doesn’t alienate readers, and having Albert Einstein possibly being the next big action star could make my day. Einstein doesn’t do anything actioney, but here’s hoping he will later in the series.
Plot? Aliens and robots, spacecrafts and mysterious objects. Mind-melds and Albert Einstein! It all starts with the infamous Roswell landing and a dying alien who transfers everything he knows into scientist Doctor Goetz. Years later a series of events brings Goetz, Einstein, and hottie scientist Agnes Font together when an alien transmission reaches Earth with possible cataclysmic repercussions.
The book has a fine line of science fiction without taking itself too seriously, with a great amount of old school spacesuits and aircrafts thrown in. If you are a fan of early Buck Rogers, Flash Gordon, or “Radar Men From The Moon” then this book is straight up your alley. Dwight MacPherson, Bruce Brown, and Mike Barentine all have a wonderful time putting this comic together and that comes out all through this comic.
M-THEORY grabbed me from page one and it is my favorite book from last week. Suspense, aliens, laughter, and Albert Einstein. How can you go wrong? M-THEORY is a fun, fantastic book and I look forward to reading the series in the future.

LEGEND OF ZELDA - OCARINA OF TIME

by Akira Himekawa To be released by VIZ Media October 7, 2008 Reviewer: Scott Green

Those who track video games are doubtless familiar with Nintendo's approach to iterating on franchises. The latest MARIO or ZELDA game is always designed to satisfy fans who have been following the title for decades and, at the same time, designed to be accessible to new audiences. That same philosophy is evident in the adaptation of OCARINA OF TIME, a manga bearing the "Official Nintendo Seal," produced by "Akira Himekawa," the pseudonym for a team of established Nintendo game to manga adapters.
Though much of the appeal of OCARINA OF TIME is that it offers long standing LEGEND OF ZELDA fans an abridged retelling of the 1998 Nintendo 64 game, there is discernable rationale for putting the manga under the "vizkids" banner, even if the target vizkids reader wasn't born in '98. Starting with the opening chapters, in which its hero Link is ostracized as the only Kokiri elf child without a fairy companion, the manga offers an introduction to the stars of LEGEND OF ZELDA, and to the fantasy kingdom of Hyrule. That notion of the adventurous outcast offers the reader an immediate handhold. Then, the manga maintains that accessibility with a breadcrumb trail laid out through explicit quests and clear, heroic qualities. Factor in the iconic game design look, and despite the format that has Link running back and forth across Hyrule, OCARINA OF TIME maintains its clarity.
Presumablely, most readings of OCARINA OF TIME are going to be driven by gamer enthusiasm for the ZELDA series. If OCARINA OF TIME is going to find its way into the hands of a young reader, it is probably going to get there because a gamer is looking to introduce that child to LEGEND OF ZELDA. Fortunately, Akira Himekawa's attention to inclusiveness ensures that the manga is capable of serving that purpose.
Personally, I've never been able to make sense of manga content ratings. Which isn't to say that I don't understand why, despite my hopes to the contrary, the very stabby DRIFTING CLASSROOM is kept out of the hands of youngster via a mature rating. I also understand that sex is more charged than violence, to the extent that manga publishers like Viz have retouched illustrations to make outfits less revealing. However, in terms of potentially objectionable content, I'm not quite sure of the suitability of Ocarina's "all ages" rating. Episodes of the manga are decided by Link using his wits and or might to defeat monstrous opponents. Akira Himekawa offers up the standard video game bestiary of animated skeletons, cyclopean spiders, raging dinosaurs and so on, rendered in a manner which is threatening, but not nightmarish. More potentially problematic than exchanges of sword blows with looming dark knights is the fact that some of it is unambiguously lethal. At least one beheading seems starkly out of place with the "all ages" label.
OCARINA OF TIME does tap into the pleasure of seeing something familiar present in another medium. Beyond offering fans a vehicle for sharing OCARINA with non-familiar audiences, the manga offers gamers a recording to re-sample moments of their own experience. Yet, while the manga's ability to provoke nostalgia for the twists and encounters in Link's journey is one of the title's essential qualities, the approach of projecting a game onto manga is overdone, to OCARINA's detriment.
The manga is accessible to those who haven't played the games, but readers of any strife are liable to be disinterested in nods to game mechanics, as when Link is sent to fetch an object or required to upgrade his equipment. Beyond working like a game, Ocarina allows itself to be overwhelmed by the task of recreating the original. There is so much to cover that segments of Link's quest are constricted to six to twelve pages. There is space to introduce the situation and resolve it, but little else. In its original form, this structure served as the framework for well conceived gameplay. Here, it supports Akira Himehara's charming illustration, but the constantly changing activity is not a model for well paced manga storytelling or involving narrative arcs. OCARINA OF TIME is workable, readable manga, as well as a suitable introduction to LEGEND OF ZELDA, but the same talents and characters could have achieved more compelling results if they were not bound to faithfully adapting the game.
Scott Green has been writing for AICN ANIME for close to seven years. If you like what you see here and love anime & manga, be sure to check out his latest AICN ANIME column here.

Howdy folks, Ambush Bug back again with a crateful of independent goodness for all of you to tempt you away from the Big Two. This week we have a lovable fighting robot, a musical tragedy, some smart kiddie material, a cartoon in comic book form, zombie Romans, some beautifully painted horror, and a book Carl Jung would be proud of. I’ve discovered quite a few treats this week, but first let’s see what Humphrey Lee thought of ATOMIC ROBO!

ATOMIC ROBO: DOGS OF WAR #2 Red 5 Comics

Being a big old case of "more like it", this second issue of the new ATOMIC ROBO was definitely in much better fighting form than the first. Everything is just more crisp it seems, like part one was it stretching out and getting its leg muscles going before the real running began. The humor is much crisper, mainly in the form of Robo's quipping and exasperated yellings, which are something that was somewhat lacking last issue. And this issue was also definitely on a big old testosterone high with action galore, mostly in the form of hot metal bot on metal bot fighting - just the way I like things and how they should be. This is much more the Indie darling that I've come to love this past year and an example of action/adventure comic book-ing at its finest. I can't wait for more Robo. - Humphrey Lee

And now, the rest of the independent treasure awaits. Trust your Friendly Neighborhood Ambush Bug. There’s some good stuff to be enjoyed below for those brave souls willing to shop independent.

BLUESMAN Hardcover GN NBM Comics Lit

Some comics are too easily digested. They’re light and fluffy staccato escapes from reality. Other comics, though, are much more substantial. They take a bit longer to read and when you’re finished with it, the book resonates for a long time. BLUESMAN is one of those more substantial reads. It’s well crafted and hits all the right notes, making it one of the most enjoyable comic book experiences of the year. Writer Rob Vollmar transports the reader fully to a world and time so fleshed out that one would think the writer had lived the events of the story himself. The language seems authentic, the environments and facts accurate. This book is a snapshot telling a 200 page story of a culture, a time, and a people that rarely gets focused on in modern comics. BLUESMAN follows two African American men on the long hard road living the rough life, playing music for room and board, and dreaming of one day being successful musicians. This being a blues song in graphic novel form, you can imagine what kind of trying times lay ahead for these two weathered travelers. The story turns extremely dark in the last half as the dream of making it big gets less likely. But the strength of the characters and the palpable love of the music give this tragedy an aura of hope when all is said and done. The art by Pablo G. Callejo is some of the finest I’ve seen this year. The panels look like etchings or wood carvings, like an obscure piece of art found in a garage sale that is as authentic to the culture and time as the story itself. This is a must read for comic book connoisseurs. Seek this one out. Those of you with even an ounce of taste will not be disappointed.

MINIONS OF KA OGN Arcana

Although the zombie genre is wearing out its welcome these days on the comic book racks, there’s still room for some imaginative stories. MINIONS OF KA is proof positive of that. Crossing HBO’s ROME with DAY OF THE DEAD, this story attempts to show how the zombie scourge first started. Writers Michael Furno & Michael Ahearn do a really great job of setting up some tense and scary scenes, especially one where our errant knight hero returns home to find his family somewhat perished, yet still hungry (if you know what I mean). The art by Chris Moreno and Mario Boon highlights a range that one rarely sees in comics, with light and grainy lines depicting the quiet scenes, then sketchy scratches showing action and horror. The story takes an unexpected turn in the last portion in this 124 page graphic novel as it skips through time to the present. Personally, I preferred the zombified past because it was something I hadn’t seen much of before, but this book was fun and proof that the zombie genre still has some life (or is that unlife?) in it yet.

THE OCTONAUTS & THE FROWN FISH Immedium Books

Too many childrens’ books talk down to kids, thinking that talking on their level equates to dropping IQ points. It’s refreshing to read THE OCTONAUTS & THE FROWN FISH, a smart and entertaining kids book. Cutely conceptualized by the design team Meomi who designs popular clothing, toys, and merchandise, this story plays with a large cast of talking animals trying to make a frowning fish smile. The book offers quite a few fun moments such as a costume party, a snail amusement park, and an underwater band concert, but alas, our frowning fish continues to look sad. The ending is a bit telegraphed, but it’s fun and teaches a lesson to look past the exterior and appreciate what’s inside. Comic book readers looking to get their kids into graphic storytelling early will want to seek out this one. Nice bed time story reading, this one is.

SEAWEED V1: A CURE FOR MILDEW Oversized HC GN Salty Sugar Comics

Man, this was one helluva trip of a comic book. Homaging just about all of the best aspects of your favorite Tex Avery and Loony Tunes cartoons of old, creator Ben Balistreri comes up with his own weird and wacky world filled with animals with extreme personalities and proportions. Following a crusty pelican and his gun-toting fish sidekick, this is a story of a quest, a betrayal, a curse, and an adventure. I loved seeing Balistreri bend and morph his rubbery cartoon characters to extremes while still maintaining their recognizable forms. This is the type of story that screams to be animated. Balistreri is such a skilled artist that you’re going to swear that sometimes these panels are in fact moving. Fun, fun fishy stuff.

VINCENT PRICE PRESENTS #1 Bluewater Comics

This new series from Bluewater snuck under the radar for me and I picked it up a bit late, but that doesn’t mean it’s not worth mentioning here. This was an impressive debut issue featuring some truly stunning artwork. Joel Robinson provides the introduction and conclusion artwork featuring Vincent Price doing his best Crypt Keeper imitation. Robinson’s art is subtle and impressionistic, but his talent with the brush fits the tone perfectly and depicts Vincent Price in an almost picture perfect light. Robinson has an eye for nuanced details and skewed angles to convey an uneasy tone for the reader to enter the world of this anthology series that will both feature original stories and direct sequels to some of Vincent Price’s most horrific films. This story, “Family of the Night”, follows a young boy as he tries to survive in a world overrun by vampires. Children are culled for slaughter and adopted by families of vampires for feasting. The story by Chad Helder turns futuristic as man attempts to answer the vampire menace with android warriors. It’s fun and kooky horror. A treat for anyone who used to enjoy the old CREEPY and EERIE comic book magazines. The art of the story proper is pretty fantastic as well. Artist Rey Armenteros uses chalky impressionistic shapes rather than fine details making even the most banal of scenes altogether ooky. A very fun debut that deserves a peek for the fantastic art alone.

A BOY AND HIS SHADOW OGN Mad Sea Dog Comics

This was a fun read that continued to evolve and spin out of control until the very last page. It’s a Jungian dream about a boy whose shadow comes alive one day. At first, it’s a dream come true as the boy fights back against bullies and gains enough confidence to ask his dream girl out on a date. But it was right around the page where the shadow convinces the boy to try to scare his dream girl to death that I knew that this was going to be a twisted little fairy tale. Although it gets a bit convoluted when it introduced Norse mythology to the mix right around the last half of this beefy 275 page graphic novel, the surreal artwork that steals from the most warped of dreams makes up for all of that. This book is one of those waking dream-like stories tries to fill its covers with down-right kookiness and, for the most part, it works.

Humphrey Lee Edition!

And one by Bug.

BLACK PANTHER #41 Marvel Comics

Serving as an example of a) adding proof to just how good a writer Jason Aaron is turning out to be and b) how great a character the Black Panther can be when handled properly, this three issue SECRET INVASION tie-in arc (ending here) has been a very powerful little ride. Besides the excellent depictions of sheer brutality and cunning on both sides of the battle for Wakanda and its resources, this has also been a combination of a very humanizing look at the Skrull invaders and a very prideful showing from the Wakandans as they stare down some rather intimidating forces without the slightest bit of fear in them. Aaron and company did an excellent job of bringing that little personal element to the corner of this full-scale war that has been dominating the Marvel Universe all summer coming fall now. This is the kind of story that really helps show how downright ugly a story of this type can get and alongside something like the CAPTAIN BRITAIN AND THE MI13 SECRET INVASION story are the kinds of tertiary tales that I can really sink my teeth into when it comes to an event like this. And if this is the level of storytelling I could come to expect from a BLACK PANTHER title, well then I'd have another book added to my already burgeoning pull list in a heartbeat. Great stuff all around. - Humphrey Lee

GOLLY! #2 Image Comics

Since I always like to follow up on my reviews on a new series like this (either to confirm my previous summation or to eat some serious crow) I'm just here to affirm that I'm still really digging this new Phil Hester joint from Image. Now, I wasn't as in love with this second outing as I was the first, but that's more to do with the execution than the book itself. I still love the premise and I still especially love the cast (which added a few more wonderful colorful members this issue) and the overall humor and quirk they bring too, I just thought this issue really tried too hard to steamroll ahead. Partly I can forgive it, because we were introduced to some of that cast I just mentioned, but there was just a metric shit-ton of exposition and the like going on here, in trying to give us that cast, and trying to explain the situation behind the existence of the first target Golly has been presented with and so on. It felt kind of like two issues plowed into one, though I can understand why Hester would want to get past as many of the introductions as he can and more into the shenanigans these characters will find themselves in. That looks to be the meat of the entertainment value here and so far it's been very savory. Keeping with the food analogies, this issue just felt a little bloated is all. Overall, though, from its sense of humor to the cast and the premise, this book is still delivering some quality entertainment and aiming real high at being my favorite new series of the year. - Humphrey Lee

RUNAWAYS #2 Marvel Comics

As much as it pains me to do so, I think I may finally be done with the "little title that could." Ever since Joss Whedon's "Dead End Kids" arc to end the last volume, it's just felt like the book has lost its heart. Compounding this, under the tutelage of Terry Moore this newest relaunch has so far seemed very...typical. None of the characters really stand out anymore from a personality standpoint and the tone seems to shift from melodramatic to trying too hard to be cute and clever. Not that this book wasn't built on the melodrama and quirky humor, it just seems that no one besides BKV has known how to balance both of these and with the proper amount of tongue planted firmly in cheek when it comes to the humor or the right amount of straight-face when the situation requires. And to top it all off, the art in this is just a mess. I know that, intrinsically, Humberto Ramos' art tends to be one of those polarizing types, but I like to think I can look beyond an art style I don't necessarily like if it at least moves the story well. Unfortunately though, this is some of the most cramped and awkward styling I've seen in a long time. From panels that just have way too much jammed into them and don't use their space well at all, to the way Ramos' gangly figures move inside of them, it just doesn't do anything for me, and anytime I see him "get away" with drawing someone's neck as long as their head, I kind of cringe at the show of it all. With failings on both these ends of this book now, I just don't really think I have any practical reason to stick with this after a half a decade of sticking it out. - Humphrey Lee

BACK TO BROOKLYN #1 Image Comics

Couldn’t let the week go by without mentioning this head butt of a comic book. Oftentimes Garth Ennis goes nuts when he’s given the keys to the kingdom, running around like a kid in a candy store dropping f-bombs, filling every orifice with every type of phallus, and taking sheer joy in anything involving an ass and anything that comes out of it. But with the talented pen of Jimmy Palmiotti paving the way, this is one of the more restrained, and therefore interesting, Ennis yarns. The set-up is your typical Steven Segal circa late eighties/early nineties vehicle, where the brother of a crime boss decides to hand over everything to the authorities for reasons as yet to be revealed. Problem is that said crime boss now has the stoolie’s wife and kids, so our anti-hero must go, you guessed it, “back to Brooklyn” to save his family. Sure it’s overly macho. Sure it’s violent. But it’s the kind of violence that makes you scream”HELLZ YES!” rather than groan. Can’t wait to read the rest of this kick ass miniseries. - Bug

DAREDEVIL #111 Marvel Comics

Come to snatch this title out of the jaws of stagnancy, it's...Lady Bullseye? As much as I originally cringed at the gender swapped introduction of a take on the quintessential Daredevil villain, I'm really surprised to say that I completely fell for this issue. Right off the bat I think I'm sold on this new rogue in DD's life. From her presence on the page as she's blood-letting throughout the issue to the glimpses we see of a sight tragic pass, I'm willing to give a huge benefit of the doubt to Brubaker and crew on her emergence despite prior skepticism when I originally saw her previewed. Also, thankfully, the plot thickened quite nicely in the dramatic sense as just when you thought Matt Murdock wasn't getting any breaks from the outside world, he's gone and made a completely reckless decision in this issue that will undoubtedly shake it to its base foundations as it calls into question his typically high levels of integrity. And it also looks like it will give the book a new angle on it and its title character's inner turmoil as he's found himself a very bittersweet sense of happiness in amongst these extramarital activities he's found himself a part of. This issue was a great way to bump the energy level back up after a bit of a lull the past handful, and did a great job of playing up the dangers coming for DD both from inside and out. This is some excellent "mature" super-heroing right here. - Humphrey Lee

Ad by Prof. Challenger

Remember, if you have a comic book you’d like one of the @$$holes to take a look at, click on your favorite reviewer’s link and drop us an email.

Check out the @$$oles’ ComicSpace AICN Comics page here for an archive and more @$$y goodness.

Readers Talkback

comments powered by Disqus
    + Expand All
  • Oct. 1, 2008, 7:33 a.m. CST

    Alright--

    by Laserhead

    New R.I.P. today.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 7:37 a.m. CST

    I don't think Singer's heart was in the right place with SR

    by Laserhead

    I think it was in Brandon Routh's speedo.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 7:46 a.m. CST

    OBAMA SMASH!

    by IAmMrMonkey!

    They should have turned these guys into wacky superheroes and sold it that way. You could Obama turning into The Hulk whenever he got angered by a McCain poster or something. And McCain could mimic Green Goblin and fly around on a hoverboard throwing political material into crowds.<p>I've now gone 32 hours without sleep. You'll have to forgive me for this post as I'm going slightly crazy.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 7:48 a.m. CST

    Really?

    by toxicbuddha

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 7:48 a.m. CST

    Ha ha, Singer is gay!

    by rev_skarekroe

    And like all gays he is incapable of producing any work of art or entertainment that is not blanketed in homoerotic subtext! What a fag!

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 7:49 a.m. CST

    Hulk sucked

    by sean bean

    Sucked, sucked, sucked. It was so stupid I want to stick a fork in my ear. Six issues of infantile twists, appalling characterisation and boring fights. I can never give Jeph Loeb the benefit of the doubt again. He is an awful writer and everything he touches turns to shit. His Wolverine run was possibly the worst story arc on any major title this decade. He ruined the Ultimates. Fallen Son was passable but superfluous. And let's not get started on Heroes.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 7:53 a.m. CST

    Really?

    by toxicbuddha

    The Hulk #6 was a hot mess. The whole arc was just dopey, like your slow 12 year old cousin plotted the damn thing. I just got around to reading this arc and Ultimates vol 3 1-5 and Loeb's stories are just sloppy as hell. In this book characters just pop the fuck up willy-nilly. Stark seems very unconcerned with the fact that someone has stolen ordnance from the S.H.I.E.L.D. helicarrier, and no one ever does explain why the FUCK you need a gun big enough for the Hulk to shoot.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 8:01 a.m. CST

    Thanks Assholes

    by steverodgers

    Been starting my wednesdays with this column since 2003 and it's always great to read the reviews and check out the talkback. so thanks for making it happen.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 8:09 a.m. CST

    That wasn't my point rev. skarekroe

    by Laserhead

    But way to jump in with a reactionary homophobic defense. The homoeroticism wasn't subtext in SR. It was surface text. Jackass.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 8:10 a.m. CST

    So who was Rulk?

    by Laserhead

    Somebody spoil it. I'm not buying the issue.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 8:13 a.m. CST

    Rulk

    by steverodgers

    turns out he's jason todd

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 8:15 a.m. CST

    You can't blame Matt Murdock

    by Steve Rogers

    [SPOILER] Well, okay, you can. But still - Dakota is hot!

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 8:16 a.m. CST

    stevrodgers - like the username

    by Steve Rogers

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 8:18 a.m. CST

    Steve Rogers

    by steverodgers

    you too sir!

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 8:21 a.m. CST

    Someone spoil

    by BangoSkank

    who Rulk is, just post it on LAST weeks talkback please. I want to know, but don't want it ruined for anyone who doesn't pick up weekly.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 8:22 a.m. CST

    Rulk

    by sean bean

    Turns out he's the psionic embodiment of the combined psyches of Professor X and Magneto

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 8:24 a.m. CST

    Prof X and Magneto?

    by BangoSkank

    I fucking knew it.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 8:35 a.m. CST

    Yep, Jeph Loeb is awful

    by Laserhead

    I don't even understand what people hold up for him in the plus column.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 8:40 a.m. CST

    Singer's Heart Was Not in the Right Place

    by catlettuce4

    Taking one of the seminal creations of the 20th century, with all that existing backstory and grafting on an ill fitting story about a bastard kid and a superstalker simply to work out your own personal issues is NOT an example of having the best intentions towards a character. It's an act of mere selfishness.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 8:47 a.m. CST

    Here, here catlettuce

    by Laserhead

    And let's not forget that James Marsden was the actual hero of the movie.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 9:07 a.m. CST

    I Like The SUPERMAN Theme Music Too

    by LaserPants

    But that didn't make SUPERMAN RETURNS not suck. I don't think Singer's heart was in the right place AT ALL -- if anything, he turned Superman into his own creepy, self-obsessed emo-gay fantasy boy instead of the boy-scout godman he is supposed to be. Epic fail on Singer's part. <br><br> Agree that SUPERMAN the comic, is pretty bad. Thankfully we still have Geoff Johns writing ACTION COMICS, which has been AWESOME. I think SUPERGIRL needs a tune up now. I LOVE how they jacked up Kara's barely legal / jailbait-y hotness, but the last few issues about her being obsessed with the kid with cancer were pretty awful. I hope this new book takes her to better and more interesting places.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 9:11 a.m. CST

    I used the magic of google to find out that Rulk's identity...

    by rev_skarekroe

    ...is not revealed in this issue.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 9:17 a.m. CST

    i don't think the new Runaways is quite that bad

    by newc0253

    the writing certainly doesn't have the edge of Whedon or BKV, but it's still okay.<p> the art is a little more inconsistent: sometimes it's pretty good, sometimes it's just weak.<p> i think the real problem with Runaways is that the bar is set very high, so that when it veers towards the average, you really notice. writers like BKV and Whedon and artists like Alphona have gotta be a phenomenally hard act to follow.<p> one thing's this is definitely the worst cover of any Runaways edition, a long way from the days when Joan Chen used to do them.<p>

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 9:19 a.m. CST

    The Red Hulk's identity is....

    by Blanket-Man

    ...not revealed in HULK #6. We learn who he is NOT: Doc Samson and T-Bolt Ross, who show up at the end, revealing that they were indeed pulling Rulk's strings, but, like everything else is this train wreck of a story, we have no clue why. Everyone is so waaaaay out of character, it's ridiculous. Hulk, with Thor's help, finally renders Rulk unconscious in the desert. So what does Thor do? Shakes Hulk's hand in friendship... then FLIES OFF, leaving Rulk in the trusty care of Lloyd "Hulk" Christmas and Harry "A-Bomb" Dunn. Uh, what?!? How about taking him to the Vault, or to an Asgardian jail, or somewhere, ANYWHERE, to contain him? This murderous, nigh-unstoppable creature is obviously still alive, yet the noble Thor just leaves him there to wake up and do his thing again at some point in the near future. What a mess. But I bought every damned issue, because McGuinness's art is a sight to behold. For a comic story, HULK #1-6 makes a great poster book!

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 9:21 a.m. CST

    SPOILERS for HULK #6 in post above

    by Blanket-Man

    Sorry, but if I stopped even one person from suffering through that drek, I've done the Lord's work.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 9:30 a.m. CST

    I fully agree with Laserpants-Re: Singer's Superman

    by Psynapse

    And I am Gay so bite me.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 9:30 a.m. CST

    Singer's heart was in the right place

    by Geekgasm

    and Superman Returns was a beautiful film for grown-ups and not some purile brainless nerdwank where he "hit stuff" and it "blowed up real good". So stick that up your ass and wiggle on it, you gay-bashing homophobic motherfucking philistines.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 9:32 a.m. CST

    Obama

    by David Cloverfield

    Count me in. I've enjoyed Luke Cage and Blade in the past. Black Panther too.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 9:33 a.m. CST

    I've just had a revelation about Jeph Loeb

    by sean bean

    His background is Hollywood (I loved Commando, to be fair) and he writes comics like a pitch to studio execs. "What's better than one Hulk? Two Hulks! But this new Hulk - he's red! And clever! And a murderer! And who turns up to fight him? Iron Man! Then who turns up to fight him? Thor! And his buddy Rick? He's the new Abomination! And who is the red Hulk? We build the whole storyline around the mystery of his identity, then - get this, baby - WE DON'T ACTUALLY REVEAL WHO HE IS! This is pure comic dynamite!"

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 9:37 a.m. CST

    We're gay-bashing homophobic philistines

    by Laserhead

    because we realize a crap movie when we see it? You're just helping create Republicans, Geekasm.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 9:37 a.m. CST

    Geekgasm

    by David Cloverfield

    What did you find beautiful in SR? I'm asking honestly. I don't get the love for that movie. I like to consider myself a grown-up, but I felt it had extremely weak characters and a boring story. Maybe I'm missing out on the nostalgia thing, I didn't like the Donner films as a kid (still love the big S though.) Please elaborate on this grown up fun, I'm curious.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 9:39 a.m. CST

    blanket-man

    by steverodgers

    thanks for the info on Rulk. i feel vindicated for staying far away from that comic.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 9:43 a.m. CST

    Loeb's comics

    by sean bean

    just jump from BIG EVENT to BIG EVENT with GUEST STARS and SHOCKING DEATHS and no coherency or consistency. They're so transparently written to be BIG BLOCKBUSTER EVENTS and I'm surprised the editors indulge him. Hush was probably the worst offender, just throwing character after character into the mix. Ultimates 3 was like it was written by a twelve-year-old - fair enough if you want to take the title in a new direction, but it totally disregarded the tone, characterisation or even the universe established by the first two. And, as for that Wolverine story arc, I'm trying not to think about it.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 9:48 a.m. CST

    superman returns

    by steverodgers

    I think it was said before (maybe in a talk-back), better than me, but beyond all the sorta creepiness to it, it was just incredibly lame that the big issue was that lex luthor wanted to make an island or whatever? he is an evil real estate developer? thats the best they could come up with? I just remembered the kid... doesn’t he lift a piano? Ugh. I did like the plane scene. That was straight superman goodness.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 9:59 a.m. CST

    A beautiful film for grown-ups?

    by Joenathan

    Which part? The Cosmic Dead Beat Dad storyline? Or the sneak attack climax of the storyline?(Wait, its over?) <br><br>Much like Ang Lee's Hulk, Singer's Superman forgot its roots in its moronic quest to be considered a "real" film and ended up creating something far, far worse than the most juvenile of superhero films, a self-loathing superhero film, embarrassed by the cliches and traditions that it turned out to be incapable of doing well in the first place and yet alo unable to add anything new or interesting to the mix in their stead. Superman Returns could have only benefitted from the inclusion of a gian fucking robot spider. Nolan and Favreau's recent successes only serve to highlight the exceptional failure of Singer's Superman.<br><br>In short: it sucked balls... big time.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 10:03 a.m. CST

    Also

    by Joenathan

    Loeb is god damn terrible. Late era Claremont is right. Next stop Liefeldburg and Winnickville!<br><Br>The fact the Ultimates must be such a failure that they begged Millar back tickles me to no end.<br><Br>Heroes is the Special Olympians of superhero stuff. It tries so hard and you want it to do well, but even when it succeeds... its still a god damn retard.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 10:08 a.m. CST

    Liefeldburg

    by steverodgers

    where everyone has tiny little hands, strange feet, super long legs, the same expression and thousands of lines headed for their crotch.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 10:11 a.m. CST

    Liefeldburg

    by Laserhead

    Also, everyone's hair is permed and drawn with dozens of tiny teardrops.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 10:15 a.m. CST

    A Beautiful Film for Grownups?

    by catlettuce4

    Um, no. At best it was a "Lifetime" movie.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 10:24 a.m. CST

    Hating Superman Returns = Gay-Bashing? Pray Tell, HOW?

    by LaserPants

    I don't care if Singer is gay, I care whether or not he makes shitty movies and SUPERMAN RETURNS was a DEEPLY SHITTY MOVIE that totally missed the mark on Supes. I don't judge people based on who they want to bump uglies with, and anyone who does is an idiot. BUT, point blank -- the gay-metaphor / metrosexual aesthetic works BRILLIANTLY with XMen, but Superman is NOT a metrosexual stalker in speedoes; he's populist heartland boyscout who would rather walk away from a doomed relationship then be a stalker. And that doesn't even scratch the surface of the sheer crappiness of Superboy. *Shudder*. Please do lets reboot, please? Please?

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 10:29 a.m. CST

    McCain's Military Career

    by Andre the Frog

    Is pretty much a series of fuck-ups culminating in him getting captured. The only heroic part is that he supposedly "chose" to remain a POW until earlier captured POW's were released. I'm not 100 percent sure that was HIS decision. It could well be that the military considered basic morale to be of greater worth than the rescue of one reckless kid, so they let him stay a POW. If anyone made a sacrifice, it was McCain's FATHER.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 10:33 a.m. CST

    Leifeldburg

    by steverodgers

    where there is a surprising lack of buildings, or background of any sort and everyone has many pockets and pouches where they can store their belongings.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 10:36 a.m. CST

    Well, Hitler may not have gotten the "Gepetto Treatment"

    by Andre the Frog

    But Kaiser Wilhelm and Hirohito certainly did.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 10:42 a.m. CST

    As long as you're going to ripoff "Vincent Price"'s good name.

    by Andre the Frog

    Why not have a book called "Shakespeare's Tomb of Teen Suicide" and "Mary Shelly's House of Romantic Horror."

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 11:09 a.m. CST

    "to the glimpses we see of a sight tragic pass"

    by xsi kal

    I do not think these words mean what you think they mean.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 11:17 a.m. CST

    Lady Bullseye...

    by loodabagel

    This Daredevil cover was a relief. When the preview showed up in last month's issue, it looked like the white portions were skin. She was wearing the single skankiest costume ever.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 11:29 a.m. CST

    McCains arm's.......

    by BacardiRocky

    In that Pose, McShame's are too long in that picture of him posing. The artists surely took "artistic expression" to new heights. In real life he has Tyrannosaurus Rex length arms, but then again his campaign is a work of fiction of his "maverick-like" ways so I guess the length of his arms in that pose are the least of our troubles.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 11:46 a.m. CST

    Worse than Ulitmates 3?!?!?

    by loodabagel

    I'm sorry, but Ultimates 3 sucked so much it made me cry and I still don't really believe it exists. Ultimates 3 ruined the most consistently entertaining line of comics of the past decade. I haven't read Hulk, so maybe you're right, but I pray to god, allah, and satan that it's all still just a dream...

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 11:52 a.m. CST

    Too many Superman writers

    by Snookeroo

    don't like the Superman character. Hell, even Denny O'Neill didn't like Superman.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 11:55 a.m. CST

    Too many Superman comics.

    by loodabagel

    When will they learn? He's one of the hardest characters to write. HE should not appear in 4 or 5 books per month.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 12:01 p.m. CST

    Aw, Ryan, you missed the chance...

    by Kid Z

    ... to write your entire review in Hulk-speak. Bummer! (Puny human! Didn't scribble words the way Hulk talk. Not good! Hulk smash!)

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 12:02 p.m. CST

    Superman Returns

    by Mr.FTW

    Have any of you guys who hate this movie seen the Richard Donner Cut of Superman II? Returns is a straight continuation of the Donner movies. If you hate Returns you should hate those movies too. I for one don't see any king of homosexual refrences in Returns at all but of course I didn't go into that movie looking for them behind every tree and under every rock like some of you obviously did. Singer, love it or hate it did his best to humanize Superman, the one thing nerds always bitch about the problem being in the comics. "Supes is too much a boy scout, he's too powerful, no one can identify with him, he's out dated and that's whay Batman is better." That is all you hear all the time, Singer goes and does what nerds have been bitching about by making Superman more realistic, more human and more flawed and all you guys do is bitch still. If Michael Bay had directed Superman Returns it would have give you guys everything you say it's missing but you would still hate it. Just like the Hulk movies, everyone likes to hate on Ang Lee but when Edward Norton gave you everything Lee didn't you still say it sucks. What is wrong with you people? Superman Returns put an end cap on an emotion driven story arc for Superman, there was no creepy, no stalking and no gay. The addition of the kid was weird but it was a plot device to end the story on a note of hope and happiness because it meant for the first time Superman wasn't alone. It was a good movie so please find another dead horse to beat.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 12:19 p.m. CST

    Hulk then...

    by loodabagel

    I prefer the movie that a small group of people really like as opposed to the movie that everyone kind of likes.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 12:24 p.m. CST

    You are incorrect FTW

    by Joenathan

    Its not bad that Singer (or Ang Lee) attempted to include actual character into these stories, its that they did it BADLY. Like I said, see Nolan's and Favreau's recent films for how a superhero film is made that highlights the multifaceted and deeply human nature of the characters while still doing the traditional comic book type action. <br><br>Superman Returns (and Ang Lee's Hulk) where not bad because of story choices, they were bad because they were crappily done films. They were not good movies. They are bad movies that failed at every attempted turn and couldn't even succeed in the areas where "bad" filmmakers like Bay do so without even half trying.<br><br>Also, adding the kid wasn't weird, it was stupid and you are very incorrect about the creepiness involved with Superman Returns. The part where he was peering through their house and silently watching them... Crrepy. I will agree with you on one point, I didn't see any gay subtext in Superman Returns, unless by "gay", you mean to use the term in its somewhat offensive common meaning of "lame", in which case... it was loaded with them.<br><br>Also, also, Norton's Hulk was fun.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 12:37 p.m. CST

    Did the Obama book accurately...

    by PirateEmery

    ...portray the fact that he has only spent 150 days in the Senate?

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 12:38 p.m. CST

    Did the McCain book accurately...

    by PirateEmery

    ...portray McCain's decision in 2002 to change his party affiliation to Democrat?

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 12:39 p.m. CST

    Did either book accurately...

    by PirateEmery

    ...explain why I dislike both of these individuals?

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 12:45 p.m. CST

    RE: McCain's arms...

    by PirateEmery

    You realize that's because they were broken beyond repair in the Hanoi Hilton?<p> Now, how does that make you FEEL? You can disagree with him on his ideals, his presentation, his policies, but making fun of his arms just makes you look like an insensitive bastard.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 12:48 p.m. CST

    Just to clarify a bit...

    by bottleimp

    What I mean by writing that "Singer's heart was in the right place" is that he wanted to: A. Make the audience connect with the character rather than just watch the character in action sequences, hence the focus on Superman's distance from and subsequent return to humanity, and B. Use the fact that Superman had been away from the world (of cinema, at any rate) as a key element in re-introducing the character to the silver screen. Is it a perfect movie? Far from it. But in my opinion SUPERMAN RETURNS' successes outweigh its failures. I left the theater feeling less disappointed than I did when I saw THE DARK KNIGHT.<br />That's right, I don't think DARK KNIGHT was that great.<br />Let the ass-ripping commence.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 12:53 p.m. CST

    "loeb suxxorz!!!1!" really? well, I'll take that long halloween

    by ironic_name

    and your special edition commando dvd, thanks.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 12:54 p.m. CST

    "simply don’t care enough to lean either way"...

    by FlickaPoo

    ...how do you feel about health care buddy?...do you have cozy feelings about health care? I'm self employed and health insurance would cost me almost twice as much as my mortgage...if I get sick I'm going to have to shoot myself like a horse with a broken leg...

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 12:55 p.m. CST

    PirateEmery - and I thought dubya had a SHORT ARMy stint

    by ironic_name

    zang!

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 1:09 p.m. CST

    aaaand another homo heard from

    by Homer Sexual

    ...coming aboard to say that Superman Returns was awful! Totally sucked! I could hardly believe how bad it was when I finally saw it. <p> Rulk, otoh, rocked. I do so want to know who is Rulk. That is what I am hoping someone will tell me! But, despite that, and admitting that it was over the top, I hugely enjoyed it. Not like it's Incredible Herc or anything, but it was good dumb fun! <p> Runaways is definitely a case of high expectations. Each writer has been less good than his predecessor, but I still enjoy the book (and I am a Ramos fan, so that helps).

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 1:10 p.m. CST

    Ang Lee's Hulk was good.

    by jmyoung666

    It had a few cringe-inducing moments, but was definitely a very good take on the Hulk. There's no need to lump his Hulk film in with Singer's Supes film.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 1:14 p.m. CST

    I didn't think Dark Knight was great either...

    by Joenathan

    But I did enjoy it. I can't say the same for Superman Returns (except for little parts here and there, which obviously highlighted Singer's love for the character, which may be what blinded him to the fact that the script was so lackluster.)

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 1:15 p.m. CST

    Mr. FTW

    by jmyoung666

    I saw no gay references in Returns and still thought it sucked. I like Donner's first film and did not see his cut of the second. However, a campy Lex who was a real estate mogul in the 70s was acceptable at the time. Kevin Spacey camping it up with another fucking real estate scheme is boring and disappointing. Also Superman II, the opriginal upped the ante with superpowered villains. Returning to Lex and not having him be more vicious or more supersciencey is lazy. Too much angst and whinyness for a Superman film.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 1:17 p.m. CST

    Also absent dad does not equal deadbeat dad.

    by jmyoung666

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 1:19 p.m. CST

    Booo, Ang Lee's Hulk!

    by Joenathan

    BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!<br><br>I kid. Actually, it had good moments too, but come on, it totally withered and died on the vine by the end. Now, is that Ang Lee's fault? Mostly, BUT I also think the Hulk is a pretty one note character so, doing a hulk film is like having two strikes against you before you even get up to bat. I mean, the whole of the character is basically him trying NOT to do the one thing we all WANT him to do and then he does it and... shows over. <br><br>Hulk works best in the middle of Manhatten with the Avengers trying to stop him. <br><br>"Oh, lets make him smart!" <br><br>"Oh, excuse me while I nap!"

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 1:20 p.m. CST

    dead beat Dad, absent Dad

    by Joenathan

    six of one, half a dozen of the other. It all adds up to the kid being a stupid storyline.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 1:36 p.m. CST

    Superman is a beeatch

    by Squashua

    I'm the _ Batman! <br><br> http://tinyurl.com/gdmbat

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 1:36 p.m. CST

    Waitasecond.

    by BangoSkank

    Deadbeat Dad = absent Dad <p> But Mephisto does not equal the devil? <p> And yes, the only good horse to beat, is the dead one.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 1:38 p.m. CST

    And for the record....

    by BangoSkank

    A like neither Superman Returns or Jeff Loeb.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 1:39 p.m. CST

    C'mon!

    by loodabagel

    <p>He didn't know the kid even existed. He spent 6 0r 7 years in space, a squillion miles away. What was he supposed to do when he returned-"Sorry Cyclops, I'm in charge now. Get lost." If Bryan Singer were to have made another Superman movie, it would have been great. It would have had some actual character development and what not that's never been seen before. Lois and Cyclops would live together. Superkid would basically be written out of the script. There'd be awkward sexual tension between Clark, Cyclops and Lois at the office, Superman would stop Brainiac from enslaving mankind, etc.</p> <p>Superkid has a father, and his name is Cyclops. Not only is he an ace reporter (if I remember correctly) he's also a pilot-very cool. By everyone's argument, every adopted kid in the world comes from a broken family with a deadbeat dad and/or mom.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 1:41 p.m. CST

    Can I share with you a pet hate of...

    by Reelheed

    comics that have the last panel as the front cover. I really fucking hate it so much. Basically its a conceit that nothing of any note will take place until the very end of the book. It drives me mental.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 1:46 p.m. CST

    Comic covers/interiors, etc...

    by loodabagel

    Daredevil #49. A great cover by Alex Maleev. I later noticed it was a panel from the interior. Not even a very big one. In the middle of the book too. A pleasant surprise.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 2:01 p.m. CST

    Son of a bitch!

    by loodabagel

    We were in the top talkbacks for a minute or two. Get to work nerds.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 2:04 p.m. CST

    PirateEmery

    by BacardiRocky

    I could give a shit about him and his arms. How does someone become a war hero when they are captured by the enemy, caused plane crashes that took American lives and was in the bottom 5 of his graduating class in military school?.....Yeah, fuck McCain and his short arms. he will never reach the top cause his arms are too short.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 2:08 p.m. CST

    Bacardi

    by PirateEmery

    In the immortal words of Dick Cheney: "so?"

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 2:10 p.m. CST

    Fuck war heroes.

    by loodabagel

    There's nothing heroic about war. It is terrifying and horrible. I think we should try to move away from the concept of "war heroes" so people will stop glorifying war and hopefully they'll learn something in the process.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 2:11 p.m. CST

    "so?"

    by BacardiRocky

    So why defend him and his short arms? Of course I know he was a POW. He likes to remind us every chance he gets.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 2:16 p.m. CST

    loodabagel and Bango

    by Joenathan

    Looabagel: No, he should have just not used the kid. It was just a bad idea. Lois and a new boyfriend? Fine. Lois and Superbaby? LAME. Sure, he didn't know, but it still paints Superman in a bad light AND for what purpose? If there had been NO kid, would Superman have NOT saved Lois at the end, would he have NOT pined for her? No. The kid was a mistake. A moot point, yes, but still, like Bango said: Dead horse, blah, blah, blah.<br><br>Bango... I won't hesitate to stab you.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 2:18 p.m. CST

    Rulk

    by steverodgers

    Red Hulk! Rulk! Jeph Loeb you are a clever clever man.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 2:20 p.m. CST

    Ultimates 3

    by Joenathan

    I don't know about you guys, but I am dying to know how Valkerie got her powers. (not really)

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 2:21 p.m. CST

    Im an ass

    by steverodgers

    he isn't called 'Rulk' in the comic is he? sigh... what a jerk.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 2:22 p.m. CST

    Actually...

    by loodabagel

    Superkid is Brainiac's baby. That's why he was immune to kryptonite. It also explains why Lois was able to survive with him in her uterus. If it was Superman's kid, he would've kicked a hole in her. Superman 6=Superkid's programming kicks in, he and Braniac enslave humanity. Superman saves the day.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 2:24 p.m. CST

    Ultimates 3...

    by loodabagel

    I personally, am really excited to see the new Kitty Pryde costume. I hear it's completely transparent except for the dental floss thong and bikini. Truly brilliant costume design by Maduerera.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 2:25 p.m. CST

    But my personal favorite..

    by loodabagel

    Is how he ruined ultimate Iron man by putting him in an exact replica of his 616 armor. It was fun while it lasted, eh Hitch, ol pal?

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 2:28 p.m. CST

    Superbaby goddamn KILLED a guy in "Superman Returns".

    by SleazyG.

    That's all you even need to say about the movie. They had a superpowered little kid (a completely idiotic idea to begin with) kill a guy by throwing a piano into him. The HERO'S child KILLED A GUY ON SCREEN. I'm sorry, but there's only one word to describe that: FUCKED. And it's not the only thing about the movie that's completely fucked--it's just one of many. The movie flat-out sucked, top to bottom.<p> Just out of curiosity: how do you discipline this kid? How does he not spin out of control, having carelessly taken his first life in kindergarten, and end up a supervillain? I mean, moronic thought processes behind Superbaby aside, did anyone actually stop to think about the ramifications of the events they put on screen in future storylines?

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 2:35 p.m. CST

    Again-BRAINIAC!

    by loodabagel

    I've said this time and time again. Fuck, I've been saying this since Superman Returns came out. Superkid is Brainiac's child. Using his robot-y powers, he should've aged to an adult in 5 minutes and kicked Superman's ass, say soemthing prophetic and force Superman and Luthor team up to stop the Brainiac family from destroying life as we know it in the next movie.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 2:41 p.m. CST

    Oh God, Joe Mad!

    by Joenathan

    Amongst all the crap that is Loeb's attempt to write Ultimates, its come completely unbitched about how Mad stll stubbornly clings to the horrid desgins and style choices that made the 90s so horrible and what an ugly color palette too. Ultimates 3 is such an sub par comic, it is unbelievable.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 2:42 p.m. CST

    Superman Returns should have included Gorilla Grodd

    by Joenathan

    Why not?

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 2:43 p.m. CST

    All I'm saying is....

    by BangoSkank

    Making a deal with Mephisto, is not the same as making a deal with The Kingpin or Doom. It's like a real deal with the davil, the fucker collects souls.... <p> Wait. What week is this? Oh. <p> Superman Returns sucked balls.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 2:46 p.m. CST

    RULK is Miles better than ULTIMATES 3

    by George Newman

    I thumbed through the first couple issues. It is so much more coherent and intelligent than Ultimates 3. His Ultimates book reads like it was written by a middle schooler. <p>No, it's worse than that. It feels as if it were a transcription of a kid's Action Figure story. A random assortment of "cool" toys gathered from the toy bin.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 2:49 p.m. CST

    Whoa! WHoa!

    by loodabagel

    Don't be dissin my action figure stories like that. How do you think it makes Darth Vader, Iron Man, The Scorpion and Ninja Turtle feel? We always had a strict "no incest, classy cleavage" policy.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 3:06 p.m. CST

    Hillary Clinton Comic Book!

    by Sackratte

    Bluwater is publishing another one. Here is the link: http://www.bluewaterprod.com/news/Hillary_Clinton_biography_09-23-08.php

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 3:11 p.m. CST

    by Sackratte

    http://www.bluewaterprod.com/news/Hillary_Clinton_biography_09-23-08.php

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 3:13 p.m. CST

    RULK v. ULTIMATES 3

    by Olsen Twins_Fan

    They both read like they're written by a 12 year old, the difference is that Ultimates looks like it's drawn by a 12 year old as well. Some of the most incoherent panel work I've ever seen to go with the gobbledygook story.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 3:14 p.m. CST

    Immortal Iron Fist

    by Olsen Twins_Fan

    Hey @ssholes - what's your take on the new creative team? I still kinda like it, although I really miss Aja.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 3:30 p.m. CST

    The reason why Red Hulk's identity wasn't revealed...

    by LastDragon

    ...is that it hasn't been decided yet. Sad but true.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 3:33 p.m. CST

    That Skrull banner...

    by loodabagel

    Isn't nearly as good as the old "Skrulls did everything" one. I think the @$$holes should start running fan-made banner contests. It'd go over way better than the fan-fiction "duel of inifinite fists" or whatever it was called.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 3:34 p.m. CST

    "Supes is too much a boy scout,

    by Snookeroo

    he's too powerful, no one can identify with him, he's out dated and that's why Batman is better."<br><br>One does, indeed hear that complaint all the time. However, I LIKE the idea that he stands for "truth, justice and the American way". That doesn't make him a big blue boyscout, it just means he has core beliefs that aren't completely self-serving.<br>Batman is Batman because he has anger issues. Spider-man is Spider-man because he has guilt issues. Green Lantern is Green Lantern because it was foisted on him. The Fantastic Four are the Fantastic Four because Reed Richards screwed up.<br>Face it, Superman is one of the few super-powered beings that does good simply because he can. That's not boring -- it's unique. And in this day and age it may be outdated, but I'll take a little of that retro attitude.<br><br>As far as being able to "identify" with him,unless you're involved in the WWE Championship Smackdown I'm not sure how one DOES "identify" with buff dudes in spandex beating the crap out of each other.<br><br> And yeah, he can "do anything", but that's pretty cool -- not too many people can make that claim. I don't find that boring -- apparently a few zillion other people over the last 70 years haven't found it boring, either.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 3:36 p.m. CST

    The Superman comics should take a lesson from All-Star Superman.

    by loodabagel

    Balls to the wall, I say. Throw your balls at the wall, Superman.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 3:45 p.m. CST

    Snookeroo

    by BangoSkank

    As far as being able to "identify" with Supes.... I think you answered your own question.... We all have anger issues (Batman), or guilt (Spiderman), or mistakes that haunt us (FF4), or feel like outcasts (X-men).... Few of us, however, can relate to being a pure-hearted God among men. <p> That's just my take, but I've never been --aside from All-Star-- a Superman fan. And mostly for those reasons. I can't relate. I'm an angry, guilty, outcast, who has fucked up repeatedly. Those are my people.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 3:52 p.m. CST

    Bango, you're the Devil

    by Joenathan

    Not THE Devil, but the devil all the same... I'm just saying...

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 3:54 p.m. CST

    "no incest, classy cleavage"

    by Joenathan

    Don't forget smooooooth crotches.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 3:55 p.m. CST

    Iron Fist

    by Joenathan

    I'm kind of...meh... on it. I think I may drop it, not because its bad, not really, there's just something missing.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 3:57 p.m. CST

    Yeah, except the guy I put in the microwave...

    by loodabagel

    I just wanted him to spin around. I didn't know he'd melt so easily. I got him out before any real damage was done, but it still looks like Leonardo had the clap.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 4:01 p.m. CST

    Snook

    by Joenathan

    I agree. Superman is an alien God who has choosen to serve and protect his adoptive planet. Yes, he can do anything, including rule the world with an iron fist and he doesn't. I don't think thats retro, thats noble, thats heroic and it is a unique quality in comics. I don't think it should be darkened or changed. He's a boyscout, but thats not a bad thing.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 4:01 p.m. CST

    Is it just me...

    by loodabagel

    Or is everyone at Newsarama way dumber than us? AICN Comics is like MENSA compared to all of those other goons.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 4:05 p.m. CST

    Leonardo did have the clap.

    by Joenathan

    April was a total slut.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 4:06 p.m. CST

    The newsarama boards sometimes...

    by Joenathan

    remind me of the comments on news stories on the AOL main page.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 4:08 p.m. CST

    mistakes that haunt us (FF4)

    by Joenathan

    You mean, because Reed was too busy thinking about if he COULD do it, to bother thinking about if he SHOULD do it?<br><Br>Take that, dead horse!

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 4:19 p.m. CST

    Thus, the hockey mask...

    by loodabagel

    That's Reagan's America for ya. With no sex-ed in the schools, a young Casey Jones didn't know what was meant by "protection." He probably wears shin guards when he's having sex.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 4:19 p.m. CST

    Marvel Cop outs

    by WarpedElements

    "It's magic". "Skrulls did it". "We're not revealing it". "Quantum Theory". "Time travel". "The Scarlet Witch always had reality altering powers...quantum theory...". For fuck's sake. This is why I switched to Image.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 4:20 p.m. CST

    Bangoskank

    by Snookeroo

    You CAN'T be "an angry, guilty, outcast, who has fucked up repeatedly" because I'M an angry, guilty, outcast, who has fucked up repeatedly -- and you're never at the meetings.<br><br>But to your point, the Superman character is better than I am -- that's why I find him interesting.<br><br>Joenathan: word.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 4:22 p.m. CST

    Image?

    by Joenathan

    If you say so...

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 4:23 p.m. CST

    Quality Image or Image Classic?

    by loodabagel

    Pockets and Foil! Pockets and Foil! Pockets and Foil! And of course, skintight armor.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 4:25 p.m. CST

    Seventh place!

    by loodabagel

    We're comin for ya American Carol! Keep with the inane chatter, or uh, thoughtful discussion. Whichever suits you.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 4:26 p.m. CST

    Fuck my pussy, doctor.

    by loodabagel

    Better believe it.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 4:27 p.m. CST

    Half alligator shark half man

    by loodabagel

    Man, I gotta do some math homework, not to mention read some furry fan fiction.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 4:27 p.m. CST

    Grootymert

    by loodabagel

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 4:34 p.m. CST

    Superhero Image?

    by WarpedElements

    I dunno. Astonishing Wolf-Man, Fire Breather, Madman, Jack, Walking Dead.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 4:36 p.m. CST

    Walking Dead is good

    by Joenathan

    There should be more boobie though... admittedly, thats true for everything.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 4:38 p.m. CST

    Also Image

    by Joenathan

    I was kind of disappointed with the execution of their whole "Mad Max" super hero post apocalypse. I had hope, but it was very "meh"<br><br>BUT... Old Man Logan is still fantastic.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 4:40 p.m. CST

    Snook

    by BangoSkank

    I'm never at the meetings, because I also have issues regarding rejection. <p> And Superman being a boyscout isn't a bad thing.... But I always preferred Brownies. <p> That's all I got.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 4:44 p.m. CST

    Bangoskank

    by Snookeroo

    I got kicked out of boyscouts for eating brownies.<br><br>badda-bing

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 4:51 p.m. CST

    Nevermind.

    by loodabagel

    Turns out I only have one section left. I'll save it for later.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 4:55 p.m. CST

    Nova was very good as well

    by Reelheed

    Please buy nova people... please

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 4:58 p.m. CST

    Fun facts...

    by loodabagel

    Not only was Abercrombie and Fitch a Nazi arms manufacturer in World War 2, it was also the brand of gun Ernest Hemmingway used to kill himself.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 5:08 p.m. CST

    just the idea

    by steverodgers

    of math homework makes me want to vomit all over my computer. loodabagel stay strong!

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 5:29 p.m. CST

    Hey thanks for the help man.

    by loodabagel

    I couldn't have remembered how to divide complex fractions without you. I'll be sure to let the internet know when I try to quit some hard drugs.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 7:44 p.m. CST

    Mike Allred

    by Gelatinousman

    I do not like.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 7:47 p.m. CST

    Jeph Loeb is the Paul Haggis of comics

    by blindambition238

    His work is overdramatic, overwrought, overly verbose, and overrated by the industry. <p> He always gets a free pass for The Long Halloween, but seriously watch Godfather part I, then go back and read TLH right after. The amount of 'homages' to that movie are pretty ridicilous. And when you look beyond his standard kitchen sink approach towards making an 'epic' story by shoving in as many cameos and guest spots as possible, it becomes more obvious that the entire story makes little to no sense.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 7:50 p.m. CST

    Red Hulk

    by BetaRayBill07

    I wrote this months ago, but whatever here goes. Anyone out there know what happened to the angry brutal intelligent Green Hulk that beat the crap out of most of the Marvel Universe just a few months ago? What happened to him? Now, its back to "Hulk not like things" blah blah blah. Red Hulk whoever he is (anyone notice Doc Samson's torn pants, and yes I know he was there at the end) would have totally gotten the beatdown in about 8 pages by that super angry Hulk who lost his wife on Saakar. Hulk no speak good for some reason. Bring back Peter David's Gray version, please!! Ugh!!

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 7:52 p.m. CST

    BTW

    by BetaRayBill07

    Anyone see the placement for next issue? Hulk green, skinny, and looks intelligent.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 8:04 p.m. CST

    Gelatin_Allred

    by optimous_douche

    I think he has his place and XSTATIX was it.<p> Is it me or does every freaking middle aged white guy look the same in his books.<p> I was looking at Beast in Fables, but it could just as well have been Mr. Sensitive.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 8:43 p.m. CST

    No Batman review.....??

    by TheWaqman

    What the fuck AICN.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 8:56 p.m. CST

    Mike Allred is drawing Fables now?

    by loodabagel

    Cool. I've always been a fan of his art. This won't necessarily make me read Fables and I'm not sure he's even a good choice for it. His art is hard to take seriously. Madman, The Atomics and such are great, and his style lent a real perverse sense of fun to X-Force/X-Statix. Still, his characters are identifiable by their haircuts and sweaters, and not much else. Mike Allred characters seem to have a hard time emoting with any subtly. However, I think his recent Madman comics look great. I was unfortunately only able to pick up two issues, but the one where he cops the style of every comic artist EVER, just incredible. Amazingly well drawn.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 9:42 p.m. CST

    Liefeld Fans, er...

    by Pappachubby

    Go here if you'd like to read a critical analysis of mr. Liefelds work. I laughed so hard I cried. Funny, funny stuff: http://progressiveboink.com/archive/robliefeld.html

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 10:44 p.m. CST

    Radar Men From The Moon

    by robotdevil

    Those words alone just sold me one copy of M-Theory.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 11:04 p.m. CST

    Pappachubby...

    by loodabagel

    Your link's broken.

  • Oct. 1, 2008, 11:46 p.m. CST

    If Obama gets elected and exclaims "Sweet Christmas!"

    by TallBoy66

    Then he is the greatest person ever.

  • Oct. 2, 2008, 12:25 a.m. CST

    Shit...

    by loodabagel

    I'd come in my pants if I heard McCain say sweet christmas. But it would be fear cum, not respect cum.

  • Oct. 2, 2008, 12:25 a.m. CST

    That was gross.

    by loodabagel

    Please disregard my last post. It doesn't count.

  • Oct. 2, 2008, 1:37 a.m. CST

    Sean Bean

    by toxicbuddha

    THANK YOU for restoring my faith in my sanity on Ultimates3. Coz I was reading it and I kept thinking I had missed some crucial books in the previous arc, namely the ones where they establish that the Wasp is no longer Asian, Hawkeye decides he is Grifter's bastard son and everyone in the Ultimate Universe overdosed on suck pills. As shitarded as the story arc was, the clincher was the Wasp pulling rank on Captain America and demanding that the man who beat her into a fucking coma be fully reinstated on the team, apparently because being directly responsible for the entire clusterfuck they found themselves in AND death of a fellow Avenger proved how brilliant he is.

  • Oct. 2, 2008, 3:06 a.m. CST

    BetaRayBill07

    by Reelheed

    Agreed the time of stupid hulk is long passed bring back the worldbreaker!

  • Oct. 2, 2008, 8:13 a.m. CST

    Speaking of Planet Hulk, has AICN reviewed Skaar yet?

    by rev_skarekroe

    I'm curious about that one.

  • Oct. 2, 2008, 8:47 a.m. CST

    Loeb

    by Joenathan

    He doesn't just rip off Godfather, but Goodfellas as well.<br><Br>"Sucktarded" - AICN should be the quote on the top of Ultimates 3's trade cover.<br><Br>Also, thats a really good point about Hulk... When'd he go back to being a Super retard with super retard-strength?<br><br>And Loob, "fear cum" may be the new grossest term ever. "Oh my God!" squirt... "...ew..."

  • Oct. 2, 2008, 9:16 a.m. CST

    Lood

    by BangoSkank

    All you've got to do is remove the space in the posted link. <p> Some pretty funny stuff. It pains me to say that I likely have every one of those old comics in a longbox somewhere. All that Youngblood and Brigade shit, and plenty of the rest. That, and the far too many issues of Spawn I own, are my greatest comic book regrets...

  • Oct. 2, 2008, 9:50 a.m. CST

    toxicbuddha

    by sean bean

    I hear you, my man. I came to Ultimates 3 as a big fan of the first two volumes, but Loeb pissed away the legacy in the first few pages of the issue. It's just so moronic and generic. It totally misses the point of the Millar/Hitch stuff.

  • Oct. 2, 2008, 9:51 a.m. CST

    Pappachubby

    by sean bean

    Thanks for the link. That made me laugh out loud. Liefeld is to art what Loeb is to writing.

  • Oct. 2, 2008, 11:14 a.m. CST

    Spawn

    by Joenathan

    It took me 80 issues before I went: Why am I buying this shit? 80 issues! All he did was sit in a fucking alley. Thats it! 80 issues! I still don't know what was wrong with me. At least I wasn't alone. People thought Spawn was pretty hot shit for awhile. Has anyone watched that stupid cartoon lately? P to the motherfucking U!

  • Oct. 2, 2008, 11:34 a.m. CST

    Bravo on Runaways Humph

    by optimous_douche

    I'm now more annoyed I wasted 800 precious words giving the first issue of this craptacular series (now) a full review.

  • Oct. 2, 2008, 2:05 p.m. CST

    He left out my favorite one!

    by loodabagel

    <p>http://tinyurl.com/3euafh</p> <p>Iron Man looks great in this one.</p>

  • Oct. 2, 2008, 4:43 p.m. CST

    Joenathan, I hear you on Spawn.

    by rev_skarekroe

    I don't think I went quite 80 issues. I got to something like the early 50s. The breaking point was when I realized the book was actually better if I just looked at the pictures.

  • Oct. 2, 2008, 5 p.m. CST

    Since I never dealt with any of that Image-y stuff...

    by loodabagel

    And have a less subjective opinion, what does everyone think of Todd McFarlane's art? From the Spider-Man stuff I've seen, I think he's one of the better artists to work on the title.

  • Oct. 2, 2008, 10:51 p.m. CST

    sean bean

    by toxicbuddha

    Word is born. The most amazing thing is how Loeb just shat on the established continuity to the point that it effectively never existed. Other than the multiple deaths it wasn't even an Ultimate universe book. It was basically a series of those lame ass Marvel Team Up books from the late 70's/early 80'e where everyone meets. fights hen joins to fight the actual bad guys. I am sorry Loeb lost his son to cancer but damn. Someone should confront him about his suck and quit giving him work.

  • Oct. 2, 2008, 10:52 p.m. CST

    Superman Returns

    by toxicbuddha

  • Oct. 2, 2008, 11:04 p.m. CST

    Superman Returns

    by toxicbuddha

    There really is no argument here. Singer's sexuality aside, the movie was ass on several levels, starting with the egregious plot holes: The plot was just fucktarded: Superman leaves the Fortress of Solitude unguarded to go on a space scavenger hunt, fully aware that Lex knows where he lives and his crib is full of God knows what Kryptonian technology. He gets back to Earth and NO ONE thinks to tell him that "Oh, BTW, you DO know Lex is out, right?" Nor does he bother to check up on him. Amazingly, Superman doesn't bother to actually capture Lex Luthor. But most unforgiveable of all: Not only does Singer turn an Amrican Icon into a deadbeat dad, but he turns his son into the killer Superman swears he would never be. Singer being gay makes for great abuse and baiting the homo enlightened, but it hardly means hating that abomination he directed wrong.

  • Oct. 2, 2008, 11:07 p.m. CST

    Dark Knight

    by toxicbuddha

    ...was not nearly the movie everyone raved about. Given the depths to which Schumacher and Clooney had sunk the franchise, anything that didn't have Batman wearing mascara and fighting Kelsey Grammer was a huge step up. DK was not a bad movie and is likeable enough, but to be honest both films get way more love than they truly deserve.

  • Oct. 3, 2008, 11 a.m. CST

    Fables

    by HoldynTwyst

    Mike Allred just doesn't work well in a world where the characters need to be diverse. Buckingham pushed the characters' differences and made them seperate, identifiable, and more flawed and human. When Bigby looks like a fashion plate instead of a grizzled detective, you lose a lot of his personality. The story was great though, and that idea of having a tyranical despot brought to live in a community of refugees from his war (which is all anybody in Fabletown is: a refugee or the children of refugees) is brilliant and definitely interesting. I'm very curious to see post-war Fable worlds and the future of Gepetto, not only in Fabletown, but in the real world in general.

  • Oct. 6, 2008, 8:53 p.m. CST

    This has gotten weak.

    by loodabagel

    Fo' real.