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Nobody faint, but Vern has a review of THE SCORPION KING 2 RISE OF A WARRIOR!

THE SCORPION KING 2 RISE OF A WARRIOR is the story of a warrior who rises. In movies we've seen many people and things rise, including The Machines, Carlito's Way, The Silver Surfer, Leslie Vernon, Taj, Cobra, the Lycans, Gator, Jack Johnson, and Fred A. Leuchter, Jr. But never before have we seen the RISE OF A WARRIOR. In this movie there are actually a bunch of different warriors but in my opinion the specific warrior who is rising is the one who will later be called the Scorpion King, not in this movie but in the very end of a different, better movie called THE SCORPION KING. What I'm trying to say is that this is the prequel to the prequel to the sequel to THE MUMMY, a movie I thought sucked. So the fact that this one is above average for DTV is pretty impressive. If you met a guy whose great, great uncle by marriage was a Nazi or a serial killer, but the guy you met wasn't that big of a dick or anything, you would think "Good for him." Same goes for THE SCORPION KING 2 RISE OF A WARRIOR. This movie is 100% Stephen Sommers free, in fact it's directed by Russell Mulcahy, who at least was a really good director at one time (RAZORBACK). And to be honest I don't hold its MUMMY lineage against it because I've been a really big fan of the original SCORPION KING ever since I first saw it, uh... 2 days ago. In my opinion THE SCORPION KING is the type of fun b-movie THE MUMMY was trying to be, but it succeeded where that one failed. First of all it has a way more charismatic lead in The Rock than Brendan Fraser. And, let's be honest, an actor of at least equal technical skill. The action scenes are inventive and well staged instead of just frantic and obnoxious. There's not as much bad comic relief and the overall tone is light and goofy while deadpan about its melodramatics. THE SCORPION KING was like a dude who is naturally likable while THE MUMMY tries so hard to be your friend that you get uncomfortable and have to make up a lie about having to go to work or something so you don't have to hang out with it. THE SCORPION KING 2 RISE OF A WARRIOR is somewhere in the middle. I guess it is the not as cool younger brother of THE SCORPION KING. It gets plenty of things right. The production values are very high for DTV. There are lots of cool ideas and goofy cheapass effects. There's swordfighting, a scary lookin UFC villain, magic spells, and corny dialogue. That stuff is way more fun in the first one because it's delivered by booming voices like Michael Clarke Duncan's ("Will you stand alone before the fury of his armies?") but still, hats off to a line like, "Everyone knows if you make sacrifices to the dark gods you get black magical powers." At first the rising warrior Mathayus (Pierre Marais as Young Mathayus, Michael Copon as older-but-not-as-old-as-The-Rock Mathayus) trains to become a member of the elite Black Scorpion Army of the Kingdom of Akkad. The asshole king Sargon (UFC champ Randy Couture, also in REDBELT) murders his dad and tries to get him to execute his own brother. So he helps his brother escape and goes on a quest to find the Sword of Damocles so he can come back and defeat Sargon's black magical powers that everyone knows he got by making sacrifices to the dark gods. Along the way Mathayus makes new friends and a girlfriend, fights a goofy CGI minotaur, refuses to get on his knees for Astarte, Goddess of Love and War ("I prefer to stand. Thanks anyway.") and then fights Sargon, who turns into a CGI giant scorpion. An invisible one. That part was pretty funny because I could only figure the effects on the scorpion looked so bad they decided to make him invisible. To be sure I checked with somebody I knew who had read the script - and said nice things about it, by the way - and he confirms that when he read it there was not an invisible scorpion. So this is a pretty groundbreaking idea and I hope it catches on with other movies. Just imagine how different a movie like GARFIELD would be if the special effects artists had had the honor to say "this fuckin cat is creepin me out, let's just make him turn invisible at the beginning." For the most part though I think THE SCORPION KING 2 RISE OF A WARRIOR's cheesy effects are enjoyable. I enjoyed the minotaur which was part CGI and part animatronic mouth. I agree with their decision to keep him visible. There's also a CGI heatseeking arrow which I guess is sort of in the tradition of the CGI living sword Mulcahy had in THE SHADOW. The problem with the movie is that it's lacking the two most important elements of THE SCORPION KING: charisma and energy. Copon (who apparently was a Power Ranger and was on ONE TREE HILL... I'm sure Herc could fill us in on the details) is okay as Mathayus. He has muscles and can scowl and swing a sword around. But like most of us he just doesn't have the charm of The Rock. He's much more your standard stiff warrior of Kevin Sorbonian fantasy worlds. Meanwhile, the movie just moves too damn slow. Too much of the movie is the warriors slowly walking down hallways, through tunnels and spooky jungles scanning their surroundings for danger as a keyboard drones. Even when they're in the Underworld and their Greek poet guide warns that they only have one hour to complete their mission or they will all turn to stone nobody jumps to action, they just say "Oh" and then continue on their leisurely stroll of fantasy boredom. Mulcahy is clearly more capable than alot of the dudes making DTV movies today, but he's also not the Mulcahy of RICOCHET who shoots a playground basketball game like it's SAVING PRIVATE RYAN. As we get older we get tired easier I guess. Luckily everything comes together pretty good in the end. You find out why Mathayus of THE SCORPION KING is no longer with these characters, how he got rid of his scorpion tattoo, you see him on a camel. It's a real good ending that works as either a setup for THE SCORPION KING or for more adventures set in between the two movies. Adventures where he would learn to use the bow and arrow that he used constantly in the first movie but not in this one. The one continuity thing that confused me was that I'm pretty sure the brother he has who gets killed and avenged (SPOILER) is supposed to be the same brother he also had in THE SCORPION KING, who also was killed and avenged in that movie. Hopefully they'll keep making more and in each installment he will be shocked when his brother Jesup is killed and then he will get revenge. I would watch another one. But I would hope they would make it a little quicker-paced and more over-the-top. Now that the warrior has risen he should be doing some of the more cartoonish fighting feats he does when he becomes The Rock. I want to see more swinging around on ropes and more victims being sent flying and more macho bonding through battle. Of course, Mathayus was (from what I hear) a minor character in THE MUMMY RETURNS so for all we know this franchise could branch off in different directions. Maybe they're setting up THE MINOTAUR: RISE OF THE MAZE LORD. Find out the tragic love story that got that poor bastard stuck in a labyrinth. Anyway, it's interesting how many of these prestige DTV sequels have been coming out lately, sequels like STARSHIP TROOPERS 3 and LOST BOYS 2 that have bigger budgets and are heavily advertised. I can't vouch for LOST BOYS but this and STARSHIP are at least semi-watchable. Hopefully we'll work our way toward one that's actually good, but this is a start - a prequel to DTV SEQUELS 2: RISE OF THE ONES THAT ARE ACTUALLY GOOD. thanks, Vern http://www.geocities.com/outlawvern


Readers Talkback
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  • Aug. 18, 2008, 5:07 a.m. CST

    mothandrust

    by mothandrust

    really? really?

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 5:09 a.m. CST

    Don't know yet.

    by mrfan

    Might check it out.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 5:09 a.m. CST

    Razorback

    by mothandrust

    More people should see it. It was our first Rogue. Australia needs to make a Razorback vs Rogue. I know I suck, but I've never been first in all my years reading here... and I forgot to say it. Damn.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 5:17 a.m. CST

    Lost Boys 2 is un-fucking-watchable

    by Han Cholo

    One of the worst, piece of shit movies I've ever seen. Though Feldman is the best thing about it, that's pretty much the only positive thing within the film.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 5:17 a.m. CST

    Scorpion King 2 sucked buku donkey balls

    by LargoJr

    basically it was a typical Hercules or Xena episode... only longer with worse acting. Poorly acted, poorly told, bad effects, and the 'arrow cam' was done better in 'Robin Hood: Men in Tights'. Avoid this shit like you would a fathers day gift with every kid in the houses name on it.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 5:26 a.m. CST

    And Starship Troopers 3 was soo bad I would have cried

    by LargoJr

    ...but was too busy vomiting. The movie was HORRIFYINGLY bad. A movie about bugs that has no bugs. Also, they recycle footage from scene to scene.. watch for it and you'll see what I'm talking about. But the constant replay of the Psychic Fucktard singing was too much and I wasted my nummy Subway Steak Sammich on flatbread :(. Not even a couple shots of bewbies was redemptive enough. I didn't even recognize Jolene Blalock at first without her babydoll pantsuit and fake ears... she looked positively freakish. Van Dean's wife must have cut him off, cause I can't see any reason why he would be involved in this utter shitfest, other then to fend off imminent starvation.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 5:29 a.m. CST

    Poor, poor Russell Mulcahy...

    by SpencerTrilby

    who's to blame? His agent, or his own choices? What a fucking godawful career after a promising debut.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 5:56 a.m. CST

    about that evil dark magic

    by Bloo

    yeah you know I thought everyone remembered not to mess with that stuff

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 6:05 a.m. CST

    Don't forget Hannibal

    by Silent Mark

    He rose too, equally as badly.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 6:17 a.m. CST

    "Sorbonian fantasy worlds"

    by DocPazuzu

    A genius label I've been looking for for a long time. <p> Kudos for the shout-out to Razorback, which is a great giant homicidal pig movie.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 6:21 a.m. CST

    Vern, I LOVE Your Review Of The Secret!!

    by SoWasRed2012

    As a guy living with four female flatmates, I was subjected to that shit one evening. 'The Secret' (i.e. the DVD) had been passed on to them by a friend, and caused quite a stir among them, as if they'd just been given the Holy bloody Grail or something. 20 minutes in and I realised (as you pointed out) that they really were just saying the same shit over and over again, only replacing the nouns each time so you'd get The Secret can help you get money/cars/women/not cancer etc etc - I carried on watching out of morbid/train-wreck curiosity, only to find that after it had finished, my flatmates had actually taken this shit on board! What the fuck?! I quickly started pointing them towards Rocky and Shawshank, but nooooooo, The Secret was *it*, The Secret was how they were gonna fix their respective 'problems' in life. Made me sick.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 7:20 a.m. CST

    russel mulcahy

    by David Cloverfield

    The man is an enigma. I love Highlander. Love it. And after that, it's not that he's making really bad films... he just makes odd choices at what to make. RE3, I had to watch twice, it was so crazy, and it's the only part of the film series I really enjoy. The Prophecy was good too. Why can't they give this guy a good project with a not ridicolous budget. (RE3 doesn't count as a good project, but he saved it anyway. Mila Jovovich Army. Holy shit!)

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 7:26 a.m. CST

    Please stop making these shit movies!

    by SeymourClearly

    Lost Boys 2 was a giant heap of human excrement!!!! Scorpion King 2 is another example of garbage film making. I rather see monkeys flinging feces at each other for two hours than watch these movies!!

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 7:35 a.m. CST

    Vern that was great, as always.

    by Gilkuliehe

    Will you be reviewing LOST BOYS 2? Pretty please?

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 7:40 a.m. CST

    The Rock more charismatic than Brendan Fraser?

    by Knuckleduster

    And Seagal is more badass than Stallone, right? Sorry, sir, but I respectfully disagree.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 7:48 a.m. CST

    Plainview Rising

    by Spandau Belly

    We need some kid to play Daniel Plainview in a There Will Be Blood DTV prequel where we see Plainview's childhood trauma of getting molested by a priest and learning the ways of the samurai in the back of a bowling alley where he can only train with pins as weapons. It'll be like Bad Education meets The Big Lebowski.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 8 a.m. CST

    Vern

    by Knuckleduster

    Have you ever thought of reviewing some of those knock-off "mockbusters" popping up lately. I know The Asylum makes a shitload of them. Movies like Transmorphers, I am Omega, AVH: Alien vs Hunter and 48 Weeks Later. Don't know if you have the time or patience for that kind of shit (I know I don't), but it would sure be funny.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 8:01 a.m. CST

    I spit on Russell Mulcahy!

    by Zombieflicker

    He followed Highlander with Highlander 2, one of the worst movies I spent money on in a theater. That has to be the worst sequal in movie history. And you all think Lost Boys 2 is bad?

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 8:03 a.m. CST

    Spandau.

    by Gilkuliehe

    You forgot the scene where some bully kid actually drinks Daniel's milkshake... A moment as powerful and meaningful as Hannibal finding his mask in RISING and Leatherface finding a chainsaw in BEGGINING. Goddamnit, the worst thing is they are capable of pulling that shit. If they do, I'm blaming you, buddy.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 8:10 a.m. CST

    It's Amazing

    by BackwardGalaxy

    All you have to do is switch every instance of "The Scorpion King" with "The Mummy" in the above review, and I'd agree with it.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 8:33 a.m. CST

    I Just Fainted

    by Media Messiah

    Sorry!

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 8:34 a.m. CST

    Plainview Rising sounds brilliant.

    by Jonah Echo

    I nominate Rob Zombie to direct.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 8:36 a.m. CST

    Vern

    by Jonah Echo

    Sorbonian fantasy worlds? Nice. Also, glad to see you mention Razorback. I think that might be my fave Mulcahy movie to date. I also remember Talos: The Mummy. With bandages that attack of their own accord? See that one, Vern?

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 8:39 a.m. CST

    Is Razorback most underrated b-horror ever

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    The movie rarely gets mentioned, but when it does, universal praise ensues.<p> I for one was always more scared of those two brothers than the powerful porcine.<p> It also had the blonde lady show her breasts.<p> Nice.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 8:40 a.m. CST

    One thing though..

    by Jonah Echo

    Scorpion King better than The Mummy? I don't agree there, but it's ok. Scorpion King wasn't a giant travesty or anything.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 8:41 a.m. CST

    In fact, with all the DTV..

    by Jonah Echo

    It's time for Razorback 2: The Hog of War. Roger Corman Im waiting for my call.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 8:42 a.m. CST

    You could have Big Ernie McCraken teach Plainview

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    I can see him leading young Plainview up the stairs to a bowling alley for a little "fun" match.<p> "Father, please help me."<p> "Oh yeah, like I'm a priest." There goes the reason for his mysterious hatred for men of the cloth.<p> Also McCraken put sugar in his horse's gas tank.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 8:42 a.m. CST

    Gilkuliehe

    by Spandau Belly

    Yeah, I can have a scene where Plainview is a young man working in a soda shop and some local misfits get a very long straw and steal the milkshakes by siphoning them out through the window. Then the shop owner comes back and sees that the milkshakes have all been stolen and starts beating Plainview and screaming "It's called drainage you idiot!"

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 8:46 a.m. CST

    Razorback 2: Hogzilla cometh

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    Beast is able to breathe fire after consuming bag of red hot pork rinds and drinking vat of Fosters.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 8:48 a.m. CST

    Highlander 2 was great

    by Jonah Echo

    precisely because it was so jaw droppingly insane and off from the original. Even funnier weas later that Renegade version. The planet Zeist needed to stay! It is unfortunate that none of the later movies could ever find their footing. But watching Connery use his life force to reverse a whirring fan to the strains of Amazing Grace on the bagpipes was schlock brilliance at it's height.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 8:51 a.m. CST

    I'm rather surprised they didn't/couldn't get The Rock...

    by thedarklinglord

    I mean, he made Doom. Either he got paid a LOT (like, 75% of the movie's entire budget) or he's pretty agreeable to making shit movies so long as they keep him working. Oh, and I agree that The Scorpion King was a lot more enjoyable than The Mummy movies, for all the reasons mentioned in this review.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 8:52 a.m. CST

    Ha! Jonah I forgot about Connery doing that

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    Ah classic scenes of Schlock...<p> Reminds me of Rawhead Rex peeing on the priest.<p> I mean, who comes up this stuff at the production meetings?

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 8:54 a.m. CST

    Sorry. liked The Mummy way more

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    Yeah Scorpion King had moments, The Mummy was goofy, good time at the theater.<p>

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 8:55 a.m. CST

    Zen in the art of Vampire Slaying?

    by Jonah Echo

    That looks like it is on the menu for Mulcahy next. Anyone know anything? Also, this guy has a wierd uneven career that seems to involve doing modest profile pictures(Resident Evil, The Shadow,etc) and then DTV passable stuff, and just dreadful tv movies. What gives?

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 8:58 a.m. CST

    So did we ever hear anymore about the blood tests

    by Jonah Echo

    done on that Bigfoot the people in Georgia had in their freezer?

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 8:59 a.m. CST

    Also, why isn't Chris Lambert in this?

    by Jonah Echo

    Doesn't Mulcahy have some sort of contract that says the guy has to be in every fourth movie he directs or something?

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9 a.m. CST

    Scorpion King 2!! FUCK YES!!

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:01 a.m. CST

    An invisible scorpion??

    by Jonah Echo

    Does this mean, then, that it is not too late for Sommers to release the Special Edition of Mummy Returns wherein, the bottom-half of the Scorpion King, instead of being awful cgi, can just be invisible? Because that would be helpful.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:02 a.m. CST

    Hello Chitty!

    by toadkillerdog

    I gave you fair warning - Neigh coming up!

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:02 a.m. CST

    Chitty Neigh means neigh!

    by toadkillerdog

    hah!

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:03 a.m. CST

    Jonah-- check it out...

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    http://tinyurl.com/6zbbx8

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:03 a.m. CST

    O.K. I think I have stalled on the DTV titles

    by Jonah Echo

    long enough, that a marathon is now possible. Starship Troopers 3, Lost Boys 2, and Scorpion King 2. Perhaps though, if I wait two more weeks I can get Warlock 4 or Solarbabies 2: Wait, there was a Solarbabies 1?

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:03 a.m. CST

    Blood tests resulted in possum and human dna

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    I don't know what is more bizarre. the opossum DNA or the human DNA.<p> How would they know if they did DNA testing anyway?<p> Do they have some real Bigfoot DNA to compare it to?

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:05 a.m. CST

    well played Toad..well played

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    I didn't even see that coming.<p> Sucker punched!!!

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:05 a.m. CST

    Jonah...look at the pics of other creatures....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    ...on that page...

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:07 a.m. CST

    I had to fight Ganon invisible in Zelda

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    It wasn't very easy the first time, so I'm sure an invisible scorpion king is even harder.<p> I'm surprised no one else thought of the invisible idea to save money.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:09 a.m. CST

    Hello Everyone!

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    This is our new home?

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:09 a.m. CST

    Danny..

    by Jonah Echo

    it wasn't real?? Im outraged.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:10 a.m. CST

    I try Chitty!

    by toadkillerdog

    Hey Fred! Thanks for the compliment - but I am not worthy.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:11 a.m. CST

    Welcome Fred..

    by Jonah Echo

    Worst case of saving money and not showing creature. Sphere. A movie that already had a big budget and couldnt afford to show the best part of the whole book, the giant squid attack. So in a high profile movie, we have hoffman and jackson and stone looking at a small, squid shaped blip on the radar, and screaming as the station shakes. LAME!

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:14 a.m. CST

    Scorpion King better than Mummy movies?!

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    What?! I like cheap shit...but Scorpion King was so bad it was NOT fun. The location work was horrid....anyone who lives 30 miles north of Los Angeles can recognize every mountain they walk past. It is so obviously California terrain. And that cheap fucking rock music blasting every 30 seconds. I don't mind The Rock, but its easily the worst acting of his entire career. And that stupid side-kick was fucking annoying. He is the Arab Jar-Jar.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:15 a.m. CST

    Danny, that is maybe a little harsh..

    by Jonah Echo

    but I agree. Scorpion King looked terribly cheap. Especially the sandstorm bit and the fire ants.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:16 a.m. CST

    So, do we take a TB to 2K then dump it?

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    Sounds good to Fred

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:17 a.m. CST

    Yes, Fred..

    by Jonah Echo

    I think as long as a decent alternative exists, that is the way to go. Today the Scorpion King Vern TB showed up and it was a no brainer.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:19 a.m. CST

    Arab Jar-Jar

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    was also sidekick in Trues Lies and Congo.<p> I liked him in True Lies, ecspecially when he pulled the gun out of the tv camera.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:20 a.m. CST

    Also, how is it we get DTV Scorpion King..

    by Jonah Echo

    but no Razorback dvd? WE NEED ANSWERS HERE!

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:22 a.m. CST

    Scorpion King was fucking horrible....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    Kull The Conqueror was a much better film in all respects. Mummy 1 is fucking gold....I don't know how anyone cannot enjoy it. The set design alone destroys that piece of shit Scorpion King. That being said....the new Scorpion honestly looks better than the first.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:23 a.m. CST

    Chitty -- that dude is George Clooney's writing partner....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    ...and he is okay in those other films. But his accent in Scorpion King?! Aye yay yay!!!

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:25 a.m. CST

    Not even on the charts yet

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    Let's jack this TB up.<p>Jonah, lots of questions to answer, my man. I haven't seen Zebraman yet but I'm working on it. And I have CJ7, but can't get around to finishing it as something keeps interrupting. It's a cursed movie for me.<p>Pillow, sadly I probably only have about 700 DVDs and they aren't in a Vegas-esque underground vault. Most of them are in folders. I ran out of wall space (my ManLand area upstairs is limited what with the screen and seating) and decided to start taking movies out of their cases and putting them in folders. I store the empty cases in a closet.<p>Jonah, I just thought of a few more titles you probably haven't seen: Going By The Book, The Restless, Righteous Ties and The Show Must Go On so I'll include those as well.<p>As for everyone else, here's what you'll be receiving: Sinking of Japan, I'm A Cyborg But That's OK, Invisible Target, Protege, Shinobi, The Restless, Musa, Silmido and Yamato.<p>Chitty, Wolfie and Mavra will be receiving the original 8 from the first kit as well.<p>All in all, the next kit will probably have 12 movies for Jonah, and double that for everyone else. That's who you get for watching so many Asian movies, Mr. Echo! So I think its going to take me longer than expected to get them out.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:25 a.m. CST

    "I'm sure Herc could fill us in on the details"

    by Nico Toscani

    Classic!

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:25 a.m. CST

    His best line ever

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    When he is hacking into that computer via remote modem..<p> "Yes, I have my hand up your skirt and I AM going for it!"<p> Tom Arnold.."Just copy the goddamned files! OK?"

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:26 a.m. CST

    Danny!! Not Kull!!

    by Jonah Echo

    Holy crap that was BAAAD! And not even remotely in a fun way. Tia Carerre as an ancient sorceress! I'd have found Rip Torn more believable as an ancient sorceress. And mentioning Rip, let's not forget Beastmaster! Now that was good sword and sorcery cheese.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:26 a.m. CST

    I saw Tropic Thunder this weekend

    by toadkillerdog

    Damn funny. Anyone else see it? The funniest part of all - for me, was when Jack Black is tied to the tree. I will not give anything away, but that was coca cola spitting hilarious!

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:29 a.m. CST

    HOD...

    by Jonah Echo

    I have seen The Restless. I know Im not in the position to make requests, since this generous venture of yours is totally free and out of the kindness of your very big heart, but could I also get a copy of "I'm A Cyborg'? I only saw it once, and it was a relatively poor copy, procured by a friend.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:31 a.m. CST

    Rip Torn as a seductive sorceress-- YES!!

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    I know Kull was crap. But I found it to be the sort of crap that knows perfectly well it is crap and has a fun time with it. Scorpion King on the other hand has a little too much confidence that it was some new bad ass Conan type film. I remember Rock in interviews pitching it like it was the most hardcore sword fighting movie we will ever experience.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:31 a.m. CST

    Same goes for Japan is Sinking..

    by Jonah Echo

    which I'd love to see again.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:32 a.m. CST

    What I should have said was...

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    ..."As for everyone else, here's what you'll be receiving AMONG other things" as the shipment should clock in around 2 dozen movies.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:32 a.m. CST

    fuck....Tropic Thunder got first?

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    You're telling me I will probably have to continue seeing Ben Stiller tv spots for the rest of my life?!! Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:32 a.m. CST

    Also, we totally need to find a way to reciprocate

    by Jonah Echo

    all the generosity HOD shows us. Just havent thought of a way yet.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:33 a.m. CST

    warlock 4?

    by Bouncy X

    seriously? did they really make this? lol

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:33 a.m. CST

    Japanese disaster movie....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    What is that big budget disaster movie with great effects from a few years back that had that very serious trailer? Is that Japan Is Sinking?

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:34 a.m. CST

    never saw Shinobi: Heart Under Blade.

    by Jonah Echo

    it's on my queue though.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:35 a.m. CST

    bouncy, no they didnt..

    by Jonah Echo

    but I think Julian Sands ears just perked up when he heard it...I always think it was oneof the great travesties that Vidmark never released a Warlock vs. Leprechaun film. There is still time.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:35 a.m. CST

    Jonah

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    Just do me a favor, my good man and send me an e-mail with those title requests. Plus, if you see anything I've mentioned for other folks you either haven't seen or did see but would like a copy of, let me know. And if there's anything I'm sending you that you already watched and DON'T want, let me know as well.<p>Same goes for everyone.<p>In fact, should I just throw out a list of movies and everyone chooses what they want?

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:36 a.m. CST

    Danny, it is..

    by Jonah Echo

    Japan is Sinking is great. I only saw it once, with some friends, but it was in my opinion better than most of the comparable crap we get over here. A certain large asteroid movie comes to mind.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:37 a.m. CST

    Hawaiian, I'll leave it up to you

    by just pillow talk

    Personally, your selections have been impeccable. <p>Daisy may indeed be my favorite so far, but The Warlords was really great, and Chocolate was just insanely fun.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:38 a.m. CST

    I would rather see a sequel to Boxing Helena.

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:39 a.m. CST

    HOD...the list would be cool if it isnt too much trouble.

    by Jonah Echo

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:39 a.m. CST

    Jonah...get any further with Babylon 5?

    by just pillow talk

    Curious to hear your thoughts...

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:40 a.m. CST

    oh, and the first Scorpion King sucked...

    by just pillow talk

    and not in a good way. The first Mummy was much better.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:40 a.m. CST

    Boxing Helena....what crap.

    by Jonah Echo

    It couldnt even make the most of it's INSANE premise. It should have been crazy, but instead it was like a late night Cinemax special. What a skin-crawling use of Enigma as well.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:41 a.m. CST

    Danny, check out Doomsday if you haven't yet

    by just pillow talk

    I guarantee you'll love it.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:42 a.m. CST

    Jonah that hurt......Boxing Helena is my favorite film...

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    ...of all time.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:42 a.m. CST

    Danny, you are correct sir

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    Japan Is Sinking is their version of a Emmerich disaster flick. It's actually very entertaining and has some wonderful effects.<p>Jonah, I'll send you Shinobi so yank it from your queue. Use that spot for a Hollywood release.<p>And I'm not doing this expecting anything in return. I enjoy your reactions to the movies as much as you enjoy the movies themselves. You know, like watching somebody open the present you gave them on Christmas morning. It's almost better for the one giving the gift than it is for the recipient.<p>Although I will say this. If anyone here breaks into it the film industry big time, don't forget the Donor. Other than that, just enjoy the movies.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:42 a.m. CST

    Yea..I mean, I might

    by Jonah Echo

    have one or two I'd like to see, but the best part so far is just watching what you send. I agree with JPT thus far. Daisy is my fave, though I havent finished Warlords and Chocolate was more fun than should be had from that premise.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:43 a.m. CST

    if you guarantee it...then it will be so....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    It is now on my queue. Is that how you spell that? Q U E U E?

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:43 a.m. CST

    Danny - I Thought Kangaroo Jack was your favorite?

    by toadkillerdog

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:44 a.m. CST

    Finally saw Ong Bak

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    Yes, the flaming leg kick was epic and I don't know how the stuntman received that kick without getting severe burns.<p> But the real treat was the elbow drops.<p> Jesus, I stopped counting after about 50 of them and the double elbow drop from above.<p> Spike also showed Kung Fu Hustle (classic) and Kung Fu Killer.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:44 a.m. CST

    OK, a list it is

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    Just going to take me a while to compile it.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:44 a.m. CST

    Cool HOD, thanks..

    by Jonah Echo

    and other than nixing Restless, only change I'd make is if you could send copies of Japan is Sinking and Im a Cyborg...otherwise, I'm good. I really want to show my wife those 2.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:46 a.m. CST

    Kangaroo Jack is actually pretty cool....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    I thought Jerry and Anthony made a great team.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:46 a.m. CST

    HOD, you got it..

    by Jonah Echo

    As I sit here writing Small Wonder: Rise of V.I.C.K.I. and tailoring the Vicki part for ScarJo, I'm writing in a rather large part for a character called Hawaiian Organ Donor. <P> Seriously though, consider yourself remembered. But dont hold your breath for my making the bigtime.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:47 a.m. CST

    Chitty...have you seen The Protector yet?

    by just pillow talk

    Replace elbow drops with broken limps, multiply by 2.5, and you have the Protector. Add a heaping of thrown baby elephant and you have instant magic.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:47 a.m. CST

    DOOMSDAY danny...it is right up your alley..

    by Jonah Echo

    Just to whet your appetite, a line of dialogue: <P> "If you're hungry, try a piece of your friend!"

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:48 a.m. CST

    Chitty Have you seen Tom Yum Goong?

    by toadkillerdog

    Otherwise known as The Protector? I swear, I counted 14,756 broken left arms. 18m,732 broken right arms. 47,392 broken ribs. 2300 broken left legs. 1289 broken right legs. And three broken teeth.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:48 a.m. CST

    HOD, forget the list ...

    by Jonah Echo

    You are expending so much extra time as it is. Just the ones I mentioned are fine.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:48 a.m. CST

    "Doomsday Danny"

    by just pillow talk

    If you ever get banned Danny boy, I say come back as that.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:49 a.m. CST

    Pillow - we were thinking the same way

    by toadkillerdog

    Tom Yum Goong is simply amazing. Tony Jaa HATES rib cages and right arms.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:52 a.m. CST

    we are already cruising up on our old TB..

    by Jonah Echo

    isnt that some kind of record?

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:54 a.m. CST

    Jonah Echo -- did you say tailoring the Vicki part for ScarJo?

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    Now I might be into this....tell me more.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:54 a.m. CST

    Haven't seen The Protector yet

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    But if it amps up the kickass more than Ong Bak, then I will watch while wearing a football helmet.<p> I will search for The Protecter asap.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:56 a.m. CST

    Jonah, let it go man. V.I.C.K.I. love will result in you going b

    by toadkillerdog

    Or being electrocuted.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:56 a.m. CST

    The Protector rocks.

    by Jonah Echo

    Don't ever mess with a man's little elephant.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:57 a.m. CST

    V.I.C.K.I Love will result in your going Blind Jonah

    by toadkillerdog

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:58 a.m. CST

    Fred loved The Protector

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    It greatest martial arts movie Fred has ever seen!

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10 a.m. CST

    Kung Fu Hustle is brilliant

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    I wasn't prepared for such perfection when I watched it.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:04 a.m. CST

    HOD

    by toadkillerdog

    I do not have the love for KFH that you do. I thought it was ok, some of the extreme silliness turned me off though - and I like silly movies! It was not wire fu, but it was silly fu!

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:04 a.m. CST

    The Protector is good because of the elephant....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    ...it added so much more to the story. A guy sticking up for his pet/friend. Bad fucking ass.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:04 a.m. CST

    yeah....I like 70% of Kung Fu Hustle.....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    ...but there were large chunks of that movie that really annoyed me.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:06 a.m. CST

    KFH was part of a three piece asian movie night

    by Jonah Echo

    we did back in 2005. It was right in the middle, shown after Appleseed and before Battlefield Baseball. Obviously, the other 2 movies suffered in comparison. Kung-Fu Hustle has such a great grasp of physical comedy. I forgot to mention it in our great comedies talk the other day. Also, the fact that Chow finds an element of redemption for his villain when Kung-Fu Panda couldn't says much about Chow's brilliance.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:06 a.m. CST

    Spandau.

    by Gilkuliehe

    Well played, sir. That scene had me rofling. The worst thing is I was listening to TWBB's soundtrack when I read that, and I almost bust a gut. Now back to the guys chatting and making the rest of the talkback irrelavant.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:08 a.m. CST

    Gilkuliehe = COMMUNIST

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:09 a.m. CST

    "Now back to the guys chatting..

    by Jonah Echo

    and making the rest of the talkback irrelavant." <P> Awww.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:10 a.m. CST

    Yeah, but when you deal with the powers of light

    by cookylamoo

    you either get wimpy no-fun powers or else powers so powerful it makes it look too easy.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:16 a.m. CST

    we could be #1 within an hour if we tried...

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:17 a.m. CST

    Lets do it!

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    Jonah Echo, Fred totally agree that we need to do something nice for Hawaiian Organ Donor. Fred has no clue though.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:18 a.m. CST

    Mike Myers cast in Inglorious Bastards!!!

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    Holy shit...that is some fucking news!! Yeeeehah.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:18 a.m. CST

    Spinoff, is the any word more pleasing to the human soul?

    by g-ride9000

    Hi, I'm Troy Mcclure, you might remember me from such TV spinoffs as "Son of Sanford and Son", "After Mannix" and "The Other Jeffersons"

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:20 a.m. CST

    Must not have been much of a political TB

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    It is dying out already.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:24 a.m. CST

    Lets do a topic..and I guess due to the muttering..

    by Jonah Echo

    we will stay somewhat on TB topic for now. The work of Russell Mulcahy and his collaborators. Discuss. <P>

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:26 a.m. CST

    Can you send beer via Fed Ex?

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    I wonder if that would work or would it be one of those laws that nobody remebers and I go to jail for 15-20 years?<p> Free beer would be a good way to repay.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:26 a.m. CST

    Also, I mentioned earlier Razorback

    by Jonah Echo

    being Mulcahy's best, but I think that has to be The Shadow. I totally think that movie deserved to be bigger than it was. In my mind The Mask got the love that should have gone to The Shadow.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:27 a.m. CST

    Chitty, lets think

    by Jonah Echo

    about it a bit, and we can come to some consensus. I definitely want to do something.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:28 a.m. CST

    I agree....The Shadow is a fantastic film.

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    It has those cool Raimiesque zooms....really great photography. And Alec is perfect in the role.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:29 a.m. CST

    Best part of Razorback is that it had good story

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    You had the guy searching for his woman and the old man wanting redemption as well.<p> Also good work of when to show glimpses of Razorback.<p> Like when he is behind trough and flings it upwards.<p>

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:32 a.m. CST

    fuck...I just went to imdb....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    ..every once in awhile I make the mistake of reading some of the posts on there. Fuck me....those people are truly fucking retards. Their posts aren't even stupid/funny like on here....they are just ignorant.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:32 a.m. CST

    yea, it's really a shame

    by Jonah Echo

    that Mulcahy isn't more consistent with his work. I took a friend to see Resident Evil 3 at his birthday, because he digs zombie movies. I expected to sleep, but y'know, I had a decent time at the movie. It wasnt great, but it was a far sight better than the first two movies.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:35 a.m. CST

    Resident 3 was probably the best of the bunch....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:40 a.m. CST

    Ricochet was a fun action movie..

    by Jonah Echo

    although I don't know I ever saw Blue Ice and barely remember The Real McCoy.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:44 a.m. CST

    Also, what of Chuck Russell..

    by Jonah Echo

    who has less credits to his name than Mulcahy, but seems to have followed a similar road. He directed the first Scorpion King, started out with writing Dreamscape, directing Nightmare on Elm St.3 (possibly the best one) and then doing The Blob remake. When I mentioned The Mask getting the love Shadow deserved, well Chuck did that one. These guys seem competent, but they seem to mostly work as guns for hire, despite having the talent for better things. I mean the last 2 things chuck did were Scorpion King and Bless the Child???

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:46 a.m. CST

    YOUR QUOTE:

    by Arch Nemesis

    "If you met a guy whose great, great uncle by marriage was a Nazi or a serial killer, but the guy you met wasn't that big of a dick or anything, you would think "Good for him." Same goes for THE SCORPION KING 2 RISE OF A WARRIOR." That was good. It made me laugh. I'll allow you to live, for now.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:46 a.m. CST

    Ladies and gentlemen, your list

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    If you haven't seen it, go ahead and add it. I don't think there's any crap on this list. This is simply to determine who doesn't want a particular title because they've already seen it. If you want everything, then just simply say "I WANT IT ALL!" and you're done.<p>1) Sinking of Japan<p>2) The Art of Fighting<p>3) Arahan<p>4) I'm A Cyborg But That's OK<p>5) The Myth<p>6) Save the Green Planet<p>7) The Restless<p>8) Shinobi<p>9) Musa<p>10) Tears of the Black Tiger<p>11) Protege<p>12) Open City<p>13) Yamato<p>14) Righteous Ties<p>15) The Show Must Go On<p>16) The Restless<p>17) Silmido<p>18) Rainbow Eyes

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:52 a.m. CST

    There's a few 2008 titles that aren't coming to mind

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    But I'll chuck those in as well as I'm sure no one has seen them. And if I can find The Assembly (I'm guessing my daughter hid it somewhere inaccessible) I'll include that.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:54 a.m. CST

    And I left the DIVX stuff off the list

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    But you'll get those too Jonah.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:56 a.m. CST

    So Red Cliff and what not..

    by Jonah Echo

    are only divx?

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:56 a.m. CST

    And if anyone doesn't mind watching movies...

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    ...on their PC because their DVD player isn't capable of playing DIVX files, that's a few more movies for you as well, but let me know.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:58 a.m. CST

    I forgot about Red Cliff

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    I haven't checked to see what format it's in but I'll let you know tonight. That is actually the most important title of the bunch. Regardless, you're getting it Jonah.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:59 a.m. CST

    HOD

    by Jonah Echo

    thats a fine list you compiled. Of the ones I have seen, I liked them all. You do have fine taste. Im almost tempted to just say SEND ME ALL, since there is nothing on that list I wouldnt watch a second time, or want to show my wife-like Save the Green Planet and Arahan. Will I set you back terribly, if I choose that option?

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 11:05 a.m. CST

    HOD...what started your love of asian culture?

    by Jonah Echo

    and what was the first asian film you fell in love with?

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 11:10 a.m. CST

    Why?

    by Cotton McKnight

    The Scorpion King was okay. I guess. I mean I like the Rock after all. But other than that. Why? Why did you see this? Why did you review it? Why is it on this site? Most importantly, what's wrong with you?

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 11:11 a.m. CST

    if we are doing this, can we get reviews of co-ed confidential?

    by Cotton McKnight

    They have some compelling storylines.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 11:12 a.m. CST

    Russell Mulcahy IS Talented

    by Saluki

    I think the talkbackers above are correct, in that the man doesn't make bad movies, but they are lacking in some mysterious way. His movies look fantastic. Better than 95% of commercial action directors, past and present. He should be given a bigass production sometime soon.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 11:12 a.m. CST

    Set me back? Nah.

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    I've already got 7-8 copies of some of the above prepared over the weekend. Although I think I might be running out of DVDs soon. This is snowballing a little more than I expected and folks out of the blue are sending me e-mails asking if they can get a kit too. So I MIGHT have to break that list above into two shipments after all. One this week and another one next month. My wife is going to get suspicious why I burned through two 100 DVD spindles as it is.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 11:13 a.m. CST

    Sword of Damocles and a minotaur?

    by Irina Spanko

    In the time of Sargon? Looks like they did their homework. Badly.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 11:21 a.m. CST

    not so good news for Outlander release?

    by Jonah Echo

    http://io9.com/5038027/time-to-give-outlander-a-fiery-viking-funeral

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 11:23 a.m. CST

    Jonah-- its funny how that French critic trashes it....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    ....who the fuck would assume a French person would like this sort of film? It doesn't look like it has nearly enough scenes depicting aggressive sex.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 11:34 a.m. CST

    Also Danny

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    It also doen't have national treasure Gerard Depardieu.<p> Or Jerry Lewis, so of course they will trash it.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 11:35 a.m. CST

    Jonah, the first Asian movie I saw was...

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    ...Enter The Dragon on late night TBS close to 25 years ago. I can't say I really appreciated it at the time. I don't think I saw another one until I turned 19 (drinking age in Canada) and Shaw Brothers movies were a drinking game staple. Of course that was the start of the 90s and most mom and pop video stores didn't carry Asian titles so we watched the same 9-10 movies over and over.<p>Then in 1993 I read a review about a little movie called Hard Boiled. And I searched high and low for it. In '94 it got an official North American release and it was everything I expected and more.<p>I immediately watched The Killer and A Better Tomorrow after that. By then my Blockbuster had a decent foreign section so I went through all of Kurosawa's stuff in a week.<p>The Asian movie scene outside of Hong Kong was dire during the 90s so I turned back to Hollywood for a while.<p>Then I met my wife. Four years ago I went to Korea with her and we were on the subway and they have TV screens and were showing ads for Tae Guk Gi, Arahan and Ong Bak and I thought, wow, those look great. So I picked up a few titles on DVD, watched then when I got back and the real love affair began. I signed up to every online Asian DVD rental service and had a dozen or more movies coming in every week. I was watching 2-3 a night.<p>Now all I want to do is spread my love of hidden classics, like Daisy, to guys like you.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 11:37 a.m. CST

    You are doing a great job Hawaiian Organ Donor

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    Fred really mean that. Thank you.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 11:40 a.m. CST

    Vern

    by WickedMonster

    "Maybe they're setting up THE MINOTAUR: RISE OF THE MAZE LORD. Find out the tragic love story that got that poor bastard stuck in a labyrinth." <p>I spilled my coffee reading that. You owe me a friggin dress shirt, Vern </p>

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 11:42 a.m. CST

    Yep, HOD is the man

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    Martial arts, beer = good times.<p> Free Martial Arts movies, beer = Really good time. I am checking into the beer via fed ex thing by the way.<p> Also Enter the Dragon was my first viewing.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 11:43 a.m. CST

    we're about to take #1....and we don't even have a topic...

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    ...really. Interesting. Its all....very interesting.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 11:48 a.m. CST

    holy fucking cunt lips!! Bob Hoskins is in Doomsday?!

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 11:49 a.m. CST

    Gotta disagree with Vern

    by jim

    The Mummy was much better than The Scorpion King. During the opening of The Scorpion King I thought it was a parody of action films it was so cheesy and over-the-top. Even taking it only half-seriously seemed a stretch.<p>A prequel to a movie I didn't like that was a spinoff of a sequel that I thought was mildly entertaining? The Mummy 2 shows what Mathayus eventually becomes. The Scorpion King tries to show us that he really was a cool guy before absolute power corrupted him aboslutely. Maybe, instead of doing a prequel showing us events before the events that led to him becoming king, they could have done a sequel and show us how the king went from Tyrant-killing-hero to evil-must-rule-the-world-and-fix-it-so-I-return-from-the-dead-as-a-giant-scorpion-with-a-bad-cgi-face despot.<p>Will Scorpion King 3 be a prequel to the prequel? "Scorpion King 3 - The Mathayus Chornicles" where a young Mathayus has to avenge his brother who is being picked on by the school bully.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 11:50 a.m. CST

    Jonah, I forgot to answer your question

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    With Three Kingdoms and An Empress and Her Warriors you have two big budget adventure movies that come close to living up to their potential. You have Andy Lau and Sammo Hung kicking butt in one and Donnie Yen kicking butt in the other. Short of the movie verbally assaulting your mother and stealing a beer out of your fridge, it's hard to dislike a movie that delivers all that and then some.<p>Massive armies, swords, arrows and kung fu, it's really hard to go wrong.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 11:51 a.m. CST

    Hoskins was good in Unleashed

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    Very good flick.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 11:54 a.m. CST

    Bob Hoskins is briefly in Doomsday

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    But he does a great job.<p>Exploding bunnies and cows are in it too.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 11:54 a.m. CST

    BONECRUSHING ACTION!!!

    by Banzai Rootskibango

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 11:55 a.m. CST

    Can 'rise of xxxx' be banned from titles?

    by Lemming

    I'm talking movies and video games here. It's just so crap.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 11:56 a.m. CST

    I wish Vern would do ASMAD...

    by NiceGuyEddie19

    A Shitty Movie a Day.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 11:57 a.m. CST

    New topic

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    Movies you've walked out on.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 12:02 p.m. CST

    I don't walk out of movies

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    If I pay the money then I stick it out.<p> I even made it through Jaws:The Revenge if that says anything.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 12:08 p.m. CST

    I walked out of Joe Dirt....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 12:09 p.m. CST

    The only movie I nearly walked out on was...

    by NiceGuyEddie19

    Spider-Man. Not because of the movie, but because it was a late night showing. I live in the south, and one of our fine southern cultural institutions among my (mostly) African-American bretheren teens is to talk, laugh, and make extremely loud noises throughout movies. When you first see Toby's amazing physique after the spider bit him, the guy behind me finally went too far. "Maaaan, sheeeeit, look at his poo butt ass, yo..." and I stood up, turned around, flipped the cap off his head by the brim and told him to shut the fuck up or I was going to make a bitch of him. Y'know, he shut up. So I didn't walk out of the movie.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 12:12 p.m. CST

    ...and I walked out of X Men 3.

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    And checked out MI:3 for the second time instead. I think those are the only two. In all fairness I did give X Men 3 another shot at home and then realized yes....this is indeed one of the worst films of all time.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 12:22 p.m. CST

    I walked out of To Die For

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    Unfortunately nobody in my group joined me so I stood in the lobby like a loser for 90 minutes.<p>How about movies you rented and couldn't finish?

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 12:23 p.m. CST

    De-Lovely with Kevin Kline and Ashley Judd.....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    I tried to watch it 3 times....I just couldn't!! I've never had that reaction to a film before at home. Out of nowhere I start grabbing at magazines on the table or standing up and pacing around. I just couldn't sit and watch that terrible piece of trash. I dare anyone to attempt to sit through this film....ANYONE!!

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 12:36 p.m. CST

    walk outs..only two as well..

    by Jonah Echo

    One was Species 2. The other was The Cell, and I even managed to get money back for that one because someone pulled the fire alarm and forced us all out for 15 minutes. The movie was a bit over halfway through, and I was on the verge of walking out before the alarm. When the fire alarm went off, I waited til it was over, and informed the theater manager that the interruption had thrown off our schedule, and we wanted free tickets, which we got. <P> I almost walked out of Timeline, because it was a free screening and terrible, but my friend wanted to stay so I did.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 12:39 p.m. CST

    X3 is fine.

    by HoboCode

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 12:40 p.m. CST

    The Cell is good.

    by HoboCode

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 12:40 p.m. CST

    Fred has a topic: Favorite cartoons!

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    Fred likes th old time cartoons best. Favorite of all is Foghorn Leghorn! <p> "Pay attention boy, im cuttin, but you're not bleedin"<p> "That boy's as strong as an ox, and just as smart too"

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 12:40 p.m. CST

    why The Cell Jonah?

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 12:41 p.m. CST

    More Foggy

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    Lookit here son, I say son, did ya see that hawk after those hens? He scared 'em! That Rhode Island Red turned white. Then blue. Rhode Island. Red, white, and blue. That's a joke, son. A flag waver. You're built too low. The fast ones go over your head. Ya got a hole in your glove. I keep pitchin' 'em and you keep missin' 'em. Ya gotta keep your eye on the ball. Eye. Ball. I almost had a gag, son. Joke, that is.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 12:41 p.m. CST

    Spider-Man is mediocre.

    by HoboCode

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 12:42 p.m. CST

    Who's repsonsible, I say who's responsible..

    by HoboCode

    for this unwarranted attack on my person?

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 12:43 p.m. CST

    with X3....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    ...Its not like I'm saying I'm all bad ass and left after 10 minutes. Naaawww......I was a dumb sucker....and I stuck around until that 30 minute sequence of Magneto moving the Golden Gate bridge to Alcatraz.....and then I said fuck this...I'd rather see Cruise and PSH go at it.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 12:43 p.m. CST

    Nice boy but about as bright as a sack of wet mice.

    by HoboCode

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 12:44 p.m. CST

    And more Foggy

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    Boy, you cover about as much as a flapper's skirt in a high wind

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 12:44 p.m. CST

    Nice boy but he's all confused...

    by HoboCode

    shakes his head when he means yes, nods when he means no.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 12:45 p.m. CST

    Foggy Love

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    Now cut that out boy, or I'll spank you where the feathers are thinnest

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 12:46 p.m. CST

    "This boy's about as sharp as a bowling ball."

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    "I always keep my feathers numbered for such an occassion."<p>I quote Foghorn all the time and no one, I repeat no one understands it. Fred, if you and I worked in the same office we'd be laughing all day.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 12:46 p.m. CST

    Ok, last Foggy quote - for now

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    Gal reminds me of the highway between Forth Worth and Dallas - no curves

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 12:47 p.m. CST

    Thast what Fred loves about this group!

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    We are on the same page! - Fred loves Foggy! <p> Smart boy, got a mind like a steel trap - full of mice

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 12:47 p.m. CST

    That gal reminds me...

    by HoboCode

    of the highway between Dallas and Ft. Worth -- no curves.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 12:48 p.m. CST

    movies rented but didnt finish..

    by Jonah Echo

    The Piano Tuner of Earth Quakes...dear Lord this one was painful. <P> The Astronaut's Wife. This one was really painful for some reason. Tried to finish it twice, kept falling asleep. <P> 13 Moons-just wasnt happening. <P> The Legend of Zorro. Never could finish that one. <P> A movie from the Cube director called Nothing. <P> Fast and the Furious.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 12:48 p.m. CST

    And then there's Fearless Freep

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    "I came to see a high divin' act and I'm-a gonna see a high divin' act."

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 12:48 p.m. CST

    oops.

    by HoboCode

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 12:49 p.m. CST

    "Well, Paint me green and call me a pickle!!"

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    Just had to get that one in

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 12:50 p.m. CST

    Sam!

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    Fred's third favorite character!

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 12:51 p.m. CST

    The Legend of Zorro

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    Was playing when that guy on the Greyhound went insane and sawed that poor dude's head off.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 12:52 p.m. CST

    The Cell

    by Jonah Echo

    As I have often said, my favorite movies are the very visual, and this one had a four star review from Rog Ebert and trippy trailers. I saw it with my girlfriend of the time It had an interesting opening, and a decent premise, but as soon as we were introduced to the killer, I was put off by the sick imagery and glossy polish, and utter randomness of it all. It seemed like it wanted to be profound, but ti was just irritating the complete crap out of me. With each new scene I found my eyes rolling more and more. I wasnt happy to hate it. I wanted to like it. I tried again on dvd, and it still lost me. But thankfully Tarsem's 8 year wait between movies paid off. The Fall is a masterpiece and everything that one wasn't.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 12:53 p.m. CST

    Missed again, ya shovel-nosed mackerel!

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 12:54 p.m. CST

    Hawaiian Organ Donor -- I don't know which report you heard....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    ....I heard from a guy on the actual bus that it was certainly X3 that was playing. And it was specifically the scene when Rogue gets in line to be cured.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 12:54 p.m. CST

    Russel Mulcahy rocks.

    by TheNorthlander

    He's one of the most underappreciated and underused directors with talent that's working today (same goes for Alex Proyas). It's a real shame to see him having to do stuff like Resident Evil 3 and this sort of DTV pre-pre-sequel crap.<br> If he made this I might actually rent it even though I hated the Mummy movies and didn't bother to see The Scorpion King.<br> <br> That said, Highlander 2 is the second worst followup ever, right after The Phantom Menace.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 12:55 p.m. CST

    Fred watched Johnny Dangerously this weekend

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    Very funny movie The parrot was the funniest of all.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 12:56 p.m. CST

    Yeah why would Rogue want to be cured?

    by HoboCode

    What's the stupid bitch want? to be able to feel the touch of another person some time in her miserable life? What a stupid whore.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 12:57 p.m. CST

    Danny...you don't have to make that up bout X3

    by Jonah Echo

    As I mentioned in another thread, at a nearby theater here in Baltimore county, a guy shot someone to death in the theater during X3.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 12:57 p.m. CST

    Sick. Don't ask. BANG!

    by HoboCode

    You missed fuckface! Raww!

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:01 p.m. CST

    DANNY YOU IGNORANT SLUT

    by Arch Nemesis

    Come on, "one of the worst films of all time"??? Seriously, it WASN'T one of the worst films of all times, it just didn't live up to your expectations that stemmed from the first two. I swear, I really don't get big sweeping statements like that. Some points are good in a movie and inevitably some aren't. But all in all it was a popcorn flick to escape in. I think most of our fellow 20 30 and 40 something geeks out there USED to just go to movies to escape, to let someone else take us on an adventure sometimes to familiar grounds and sometimes not, but that's what it was. Now all of a sudden if something's not absolutely perfect ot's panned as the worst godawful creation ever that raped our 9 bucks etc. Overreaction. For instance, my girlfriend and I are on vacation and we decided last night to catch Clone Wars despite the hatred on these boards (and I really liked Genndy's take on it so I was admidedly a little worried it would suck). Long story short, it wasn't amazing, it didn't change my world, it didn't "breath new life into Star Wars" for me or anything like that but despite the ridiculous Ziro the Hutt and the stiff line here and there (again, anyone who says "here or there?!?" needs to do some research and look up criticism of the OT, even the actors joked about it) its pascing was fun, resembling the movies, most of the music was good enough, and ultimately it was a couple hours of genre escape. We left the theater both saying yeah, that was fun, kinda cool. It boggles my mind that everyone shits their pants if something isn't Empire Strikes Back or the freaking Ilyiad.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:01 p.m. CST

    Haven't ever walked out of a movie

    by jim

    I figure I've paid and maybe, just maybe, everything will come together in the end and make it all worthwhile.<p>One example, watched this movie with Tom Berenger & Daphne Zuniga at home. We started making fun of Zuniga's accent and the fact that she couldn't hold it - it seemed so poorly done. But later in the film we found out her character was the one faking the accent. So it made sense.<p>Last summer I was home, bored, and flipping channels and a movie was just starting so I began to watch. Soon, I knew it was "Employee of the Month" but I continued to watch to see how much I could take. I got about an hour into it before I realized I had just spent an hour watching this movie. But then I decided I had come this far, might as well stick it out to the bitter end. Stupid, stupid, stupid movie with plot holes bigger than Dane Cook, Jessica Simpson and Andy Dick's lack of talent, combined. I got just enough out of it to not consider it a total waste of time.<p>The same can not be said for "Date Movie". I think this film holds the (lack of) distinction of being the only movie I have ever watched that I thought was a complete, total, absolute waste of my time (and I've seen Gigli!). I had to watch it; I could not believe it was as bad as I had heard. It wasn't - it was worse. I thought I might find a few funny jokes here and there. I didn't. And to make things worse - the supposed jokes, that weren't funny after 3 seconds, were stretched into 3 minute bits. This movie had no purpose. There wasn't a single thing in there that was original. There was no reason for it to be made. I am proud to say I learned my lesson and have steered clear from Epic Movie and Meet the Spartans. I will make sure to go see The Dark Knight again, or maybe Tropic Thunder, when Disaster Movie comes out. Why? To give money to any movie that is not the one by those responsible for the anal abortion that was Date Movie.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:03 p.m. CST

    HoboCode saw Johhny Dangerously too!

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    That was a funny bird.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:05 p.m. CST

    Relax!

    by HoboCode

    Relax!!! I'm standing here with my dork in my hand!<p> That's not your dork. LOOK!

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:06 p.m. CST

    Johnny Dangerously

    by HoboCode

    One of the funniest movies ever made.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:06 p.m. CST

    It's Fargin war!

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:06 p.m. CST

    qouting Johnny Dangerously..awesome.

    by Jonah Echo

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:07 p.m. CST

    I've never walked out of a movie

    by Series7

    But I've fallen asleep during a bunch of movies in theaters: MIB 2, Sahrah, Day After Tomorrow, xXx and Van Helsing to name a few. I usually finish movies I rent even if I fall asleep like 20 times but one movie I couldn't bother giving a second chance even though I really wanted to see it was Stranger Then Fiction, I just hated that movie couldn't give a shit that I slept through 20-30 minutes of it.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:07 p.m. CST

    We are number 1....that seemed too easy.

    by Jonah Echo

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:09 p.m. CST

    You fargin iceholes!

    by HoboCode

    Knock down that wall. Knock down that wall. And knock down that fargin wall!. KABOOM!

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:11 p.m. CST

    Speaking of Employee of the month

    by Series7

    Dane Cook has made a sequel to Good Luck Chuck, and it looks to be about just as bad! Why is it that when stand up comedians get popular they have to go out and make crap movies as many as possible?

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:11 p.m. CST

    o.k. what are the best DTV movies out there?

    by Jonah Echo

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:11 p.m. CST

    Roman Moroni

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    would like to direct this to the distinguished members of the panel: You lousy cork-soakers. You have violated my farging rights. Dis somanumbatching country was founded so that the liberties of common patriotic citizens like me could not be taken away by a bunch of fargin iceholes... like yourselves.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:12 p.m. CST

    One of my fave DTVs is

    by Jonah Echo

    Snow White: A Tale of Terror. Anyone else get a kick out of this one, with Sigourney Weaver as the dark queen?

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:16 p.m. CST

    Vern, How was Randy Couture?

    by TELF

    He made this just after he vacated the UFC HW title last year. It was a pretty big scandal for MMA fans. It's his first lead role too. Just wondering how he got on.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:16 p.m. CST

    Arch Nemesis-- let me clarify....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    why you are a cunt with a 5 O'clock shadow. I had no expectations going in. I can give a fuck about X Men. The first two were okay.....but as a whole the films are shit compared to the Fox cartoon. When I said it was one of the worst films of all time, I meant for the budget and caliber of people involved. I group films by budget really. I'm not going to be an ignorant cunt and compare Sci-Fi channels' Monster Ark to X Men 3. Those are two completely different classes of films. As far as a big budget film with know players involved....yes X Men 3 is one of the worst of those films ever made. Another would be Indy IV. There is nothing sweeping about that statement. Obviously Ed Wood, Sci-Fi channel directors, and a shitload of other hacks make films that are far worse than X3 or Indy IV, but considering the resources available.....are they really worse? My answer is no. And the fun factor is a big issue for me. X3 was like getting fuck teeth pulled. It was a nuisance of a chore to sit through. Cheap shit like Frankenfish (with a whopping budget of 3 million.....roughly 1/70th X3's budget can be far more interesting and a hell of a lot more fun.) If you are the sort of dull cow that will fork over $10 bucks to sit through shamefully horrid shit like X3 then thats your deal. Don't fucking tell me my expectations were too high, you know fuck about my expectations or my taste in film. Tonight, I suggest you go for a joy-ride while blasting Human League's "Don't You Want Me?" and plow your car head on into a brick wall. And don't bother with the seat-belt....the world is full of struggling AIDS patients, you won't be missed.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:17 p.m. CST

    Big Jim --

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    Its funny you sit through a Dane Cook film just to see how much you can take. You are a true masochist my friend.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:21 p.m. CST

    DannyGlovers riled up. Fred getting out the popcorn!

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    Hee hee. <p>Flame feeding Fred.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:23 p.m. CST

    Fred fell asleep on MIB: 3

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    Fred heard so much about how great it was. It was big disappointment to Fred.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:24 p.m. CST

    Fred meant Mission Impossible 3

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:28 p.m. CST

    You shouldn't kick me in the balls...

    by HoboCode

    My sister kicked me in the balls once....ONCE.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:28 p.m. CST

    It's an 88 Magnum.

    by HoboCode

    It shoots through schools.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:32 p.m. CST

    Freds

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    Really? Man I thought MI:3 was great. I like how it is a pretty small intimate story if you think about it. PSH doesn't have 100 goons with machine guns....its really just a mind game between him and Ethan. And the whole elusive Rabbit's Foot thing-- I like that sort of shit where nobody has any idea what it really is. That whole film just felt much different than the standard Hollywood action film to me. It was a much different tone and approach, like the scene when Ethan goes into the heavily guarded building in China to get the Rabbit's Foot I believe-- and they go on and on about how crazy the security is and how many guys he will have to go through, and once he gets inside we don't see any of it. We cut to those two in the car having a personal conversation....and then Ethan says, "I got it...I'm comin' out!" or something like that and bursts through the window. Shit like that just felt fresh and different to me.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:34 p.m. CST

    I say that dog is lower than a snake full of buckshot

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    Can't get enough Foggy

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:36 p.m. CST

    I always confuse...

    by Gilkuliehe

    Chuck (or Charles) Russell with Russell Mulcahy, and funny enough the former directed THE ALREADY RISEN SCORPION KING. He (Chuck) also directed NIGHTMARE 3: DREAM WARRIORS and THE BLOB, which are good in my book, and ERASER and THE MASK, which are not. <p> The point is, Vern got me interested in looking for the killer pig movie and Ricochet... <p> And seriously fellas, what's with this "let's talk anything among us three or four guys and just post anything non-stop" thing? Is it the new thing? I don't think it's cool, but hell, I'm not any of you three or four guys so what do I know, right?

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:36 p.m. CST

    Funny shit is Johnny Dangerously

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    When he is working at the pet store and has the price guns marking kittens.<p> Damn I need to rewatch that movie. Forgot how funny it was.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:37 p.m. CST

    Phillip Seymour Hoffman

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    Was the reason Fred fell asleep. He is a usually a very good actor, but he felt the need to add pork products to his performance. Fred heard so much about how he would be the greatest screen villain since Lector - Fred greatly disappointed.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:37 p.m. CST

    Films I slept through is a topic for the ages...

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    ...I nodded off during MIB2, Riddick, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory and PotC2 to name a few.<p>Fred, save me some popcorn. Danny is in fine form today.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:44 p.m. CST

    MI3

    by Series7

    I know nothing about the show, so I'm going off of what i know from the movies. So the big event scenes of the first two were how Sir Thomas Cruise broke into the buildings, and so for the third one they totally edited out that scene and just have him jumping out of a window. The whole trebuchet thing was cool, but I wanted to see how Tom got into the buildinig.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:45 p.m. CST

    Riddick is a sci-fi materpiece.

    by HoboCode

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:45 p.m. CST

    masterpiece.

    by HoboCode

    fammit.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:45 p.m. CST

    The Women!

    by Series7

    Has anyone seen the TV spots for this total geekgasm! Oh man this looks fucking awesome!

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:45 p.m. CST

    Gilkuliehe

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    There's actually close to a dozen of us but right now the others are MIA and we're just talking, dude. Most TBs flatline around the 130 post mark and that's when we swoop in and begin our chats. We're very respectful for the most part try to add something to AICN other that bickering about politics and religion.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:46 p.m. CST

    You appear...

    by ThereWolf

    ... to be pissing off the indigenous population of this TB.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:46 p.m. CST

    Gilkuliehe

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    Instead of being a prick and insulting us...you could join in on the conversation and have some fun during the work day as well. This is not an exclusive club....the only requirement is you have abnormally large testicles. <p> If it doesn't sound like this is for you then gladly....FUCK OFF.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:46 p.m. CST

    the funny thing about Gilkuliehe

    by Jonah Echo

    is that he comes on here posts about Chuck Russell and Russell Mulcahy, a topic I covered in the same way, with more detail, about 40 or more posts ago, and then gripes about us again. That's twice now you have mentioned it.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:48 p.m. CST

    seriously...join in G, we aren't completely

    by Jonah Echo

    off topic. If we didnt love b-movies, and at least root for DTV movies to be good, we wouldn't be here.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:50 p.m. CST

    I agree Hobo....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    Riddick is a great film. its an insane follow up to something as simple as Pitch Black. The design of the world is just fucking awesome. I remember thinking the desert planet with middle-eastern style structures reminded me a bit of Tatooine. And then I thought fuck....imagine if the prequels were more like Riddick-- the tone and the maturity of them I mean. That would have been fucking awesome.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:51 p.m. CST

    I'm glad people actually enjoyed Riddick

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    But I just couldn't find anything in the first 30 minutes to keep me awake. My friend elbowed me during the credits and I think I turned to him and said "That was the best sleep I ever paid money for."

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:54 p.m. CST

    The Women with Annette Benning and Meg Ryan?

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    The cast looks MILF-a-riffic.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:54 p.m. CST

    Add my voice to...

    by ThereWolf

    the Riddick love. I like the scene where that guy walks out into the sun, holds up his arm as if to ward off the light and then just dissolves. Makes me think of Batty from Blade Runner for some reason.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:54 p.m. CST

    Hobo and Danny agree! Thank you Riddick!

    by Jonah Echo

    Outrunning the sun on Crematoria= silly, but awesome.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:56 p.m. CST

    Also, loved the final shot of Chronicles..

    by Jonah Echo

    it's major problem for me was the lame villains. Necromongers didnt really work for me.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:57 p.m. CST

    the end of Riddick....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    ...is pure fucking magic. The way he just slouches into the throne all beat up and exhausted, and that massive crane pull back revealing his new kingdom. Amazing. I want a 3rd chapter in that story. Where the hell could it go? Perhaps another galaxy tries to invade and Riddick leads his people to war to defend themselves? What the hell would a war in that universe look like?

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:57 p.m. CST

    I didn't really like the main villian guy...

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    but Urban and Thandie were bad ass.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:58 p.m. CST

    Do I need to watch Riddick again?

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    It sure sounds like it. It better be good or I'm going to crack one off in your next package after a meal of Indian food.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:58 p.m. CST

    Danny..

    by Jonah Echo

    I always assumed that it would involve Riddick trying to take Kira to the Necroverse to revive her, and bring her back. In the meantime, it would allow him to learn more on his Furyan past, and come face to face to whatever the real force behind the Necromongers was.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 1:58 p.m. CST

    DGDB

    by HoboCode

    Riddick is epic, has great action and characterization, and the ending in which Riddick takes over as leader is fucking great. I love his statue in the credits. "You keep what you kill."<p> There's so many greta moments though. Riddick killing the guy by driving the tea cup into his chest, and the nputting down a paper clip or whatever and everyone running away. Riddick killing the huge Necromonger i nthe beginning: "He was one my best men!" Riddick: "If you say so."

  • www.garfieldminusgarfield.net <p> I thought it was actually quite clever and often works really well. <p> "Garfield Minus Garfield is a site dedicated to removing Garfield from the Garfield comic strips in order to reveal the existential angst of a certain young Mr. Jon Arbuckle. It is a journey deep into the mind of an isolated young everyman as he fights a losing battle against loneliness and depression in a quiet American suburb."

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2 p.m. CST

    HOD..

    by Jonah Echo

    to avoid having Red Cliff smell like digested chicken masala, I'll admit that I didn't think much of it the first time I saw it, and the second time I was only marginally more enthusiastic about it, but I DO think it had alot of cool stuff in it, and I would have watched a third. It was no Pitch Black, but it was a decent start to a bigger story.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:02 p.m. CST

    Hobo...what was in the credits?

    by Jonah Echo

    what statue? must have missed that. Think it's time to pick up the "Riddick trilogy".

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:02 p.m. CST

    Hawaiian

    by ThereWolf

    What you're doing for us is above and beyond the call of duty.<p>Where do you buy your blank media, is it an online store? I'm in the UK but I don't see any reason why I wouldn't be able to log on to an online US store and send a load of blank media your way. I'd just need a delivery address.<p>I just wanna thank you properly and I don't know how to.<p>If there's one title I'd like to see it's Grave Of The Fireflies(?) Danny said it made him cry. If it made Danny cry that's a good enough recommendation for me.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:04 p.m. CST

    Outrunning the sun.

    by HoboCode

    It was a great nod to Pitch Black. And the Necromonger design was shit but it was supposed to be. Riddick even makes fun of it when that one dude gives him a little tour of the palace. "Magnificent isn't it?" Riddick: "I might have gone a different way."

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:04 p.m. CST

    invisible garfield...Shan, that's pretty cool

    by Jonah Echo

    thanks for that link. It is pretty funny, and witty when done that way. I never considered that angle, save for briefly contemplating the fact that Garfield merely seems to "think" things as opposed to saying them, and yet John responds perfectly to it.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:05 p.m. CST

    Just couldn't really get into Riddick

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    I do admit that the settings were top notch, but I like Pitch Black way better.<p> Agreed that if Pitch Black had the production budget of Riddick...Damn that would have been even more impressive.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:05 p.m. CST

    Jonah Echo

    by HoboCode

    As the credits role it pans back, maybe towards the end, and you see a bronze statue of Riddick posing in the throne chair like where the movie ended. It's sweet.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:07 p.m. CST

    Hello ThereWolf

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    Hee hee. Get's Fred every time <p> Indy IV made DannyGlovers cry too - but for a different reason Fred thinks! <p>

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:09 p.m. CST

    Rise of a King

    by Abominable Snowcone

    Deflation of a Penis

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:10 p.m. CST

    If they did a third film...

    by HoboCode

    I'd want to know more about the Underverse. Is it real or are the Necromongers just falling for bullshit from the Lord Marshall who is the only person whose been there supposedly. He had some kind of power.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:10 p.m. CST

    DGDB et al.

    by Gilkuliehe

    The closest thing to insult you, DGDB, was stating my opinion of your activity here being "not cool". If that made you angry enough to actually insult me and call me a prick, well... That's your thing, I guess. <p> Sorry I didn't read your post Jonah Echo, but seriously, you guys flood the TB in a way that it's easy to get lost, with many references to previous conversations and out of the blue subject changes. (Sorry again Danny but that sure feels like an exclusive club). <p> Anyhoo, my questions have been answered, thanks.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:11 p.m. CST

    Hey Fred!

    by ThereWolf

    All's well in your world I trust. And do I detect a subtle liking for Foghorn Leghorn there.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:11 p.m. CST

    Fred Agrees with ChittyChittyGangBang

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    Riddick suffered from the 'bigger is better' premise (which it aint)and the same type of hubris that Matrix 2 and 3 had regarding the the characters and Religious meaning. Fred half expected to hear about Midichlorians. <p> But, it had some impressive fights and sets, and action, that Fred can not dismiss. But it is still inferior to Pitch Black.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:12 p.m. CST

    Gilk...

    by Jonah Echo

    yea, that's sort of because some conversations keep going, due to a relatively large group now(it's def more than 4 or 5 people) sharing info and what not. But at the same time, we don't really want to overrun the TB. I'd much prefer a more streamlined integration. <P> Anyway Gilk, see anything good over the weekend?

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:15 p.m. CST

    Gilk..

    by Jonah Echo

    often, we end up coming to a TB after it as more or less dried up-these DTV or Twitch articles often have a short shelf life, but we caught this one while it was still going, and didn't mean to inundate it. With so many people in tow, it's like rolling up in someone's place uninvited, shaving the dog, raiding the fridge and clogging the toilet.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:17 p.m. CST

    Hello Gilkuliehe

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    We are not an exclusive club. We are just movie loving geeks. We try an take a TB that is very low on the list - or off the list, and just chat about our favorite subjects. We are undermanned today, usually around 12 of us, but we always are looking to add new regulars. You would be more than welcome. This is a refuge of sorts on AICN. No flame wars - ok maybe a few, but they end very, very quickly and are always caused by disagreeable types who only come in to cause trouble. This is a geek love. Join in!

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:18 p.m. CST

    Fred is unabashed in love of Foghorn Leghorn cartoons

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    Just great quotes. Fred loves Marx Brothers quotes too!

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:19 p.m. CST

    As a matter of fact, I did.

    by Gilkuliehe

    I saw THE SAVAGES and thought it was a very touching and funny movie. But I will only speak of said movie when the topic dictated by the article allows it, otherwise it would just be an off-topic posting of-- I'm kidding, man. It's very good if you're into that kind of movies, cheers.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:19 p.m. CST

    Fred, I noticed your handiwork..

    by Jonah Echo

    over in the old TB. Ha!

  • Jeez, guys, everyone knows that.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:22 p.m. CST

    Thanks, Fred.

    by Gilkuliehe

    I personally love the Marc Anthony and Pussyfoot ones. <p> And precisely, Jonah, that's how I felt when I started pissing you guys off. Maybe not the dog shaving part, I would laugh if you do that cuz my dog looks funny when shaved, I swear.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:22 p.m. CST

    Anybody see The Bank Job?

    by HoboCode

    Suprisingly decent film.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:22 p.m. CST

    I've had The Savages on the queue for a while..

    by Jonah Echo

    and haven't brought myself to watch it. The bit with the father in need of care is a bit too reminiscent of a similar situation with my grandfather 10 years ago, and I think it might be hard to watch that. But with your recommendation, I may go ahead and give it a go, and if it's too much Ill turn it off. Thanks.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:22 p.m. CST

    Fred

    by ThereWolf

    "I'll thank you to keep a civil tongue in your head - and not in mine!"

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:23 p.m. CST

    ...black magical powers."

    by Darwyn

    Gosh!

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:23 p.m. CST

    Liked The Bank Job, Hobo..

    by Jonah Echo

    it wasnt great, but it was a solid movie, and I'm personally tiring of heist movies so that it worked for me was def something.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:26 p.m. CST

    How strange is that...

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    ...last night the family was over for supper and my brother and mom were discussing The Savages. I haven't watched it yet so I couldn't chime in, but my bro said he didn't like because all the characters were scumbags. My mom on the other hand loved the acting and the story and enjoyed the movie as a result.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:26 p.m. CST

    Great Groucho

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    I don't care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:27 p.m. CST

    TBJ: I think it worked because it was period.

    by HoboCode

    It added something slightly new to the genre. But I agree I don't need to see another heist film anytime soon.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:27 p.m. CST

    More Groucho

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    Those are my principles, and if you don't like them... well, I have others.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:28 p.m. CST

    DANNY YOU IGNORANT SLUT

    by Arch Nemesis

    Such vitriole. Actually I'm listening to Man or Astroman?'s A Spectrum of Infinite Scale. I just read an Asimov story from Robot Visions and sooner or later will swim in the ocean with my lovely geek of a girlfriend. Ah how easily buttons are pushed, one simply quotes SNL and boom someone snarls through their keyboard. Honestly, I agree with you wholeheartedly regarding comparing apples to oranges. And I will say that some movies can be ruined with a poor production choice, a great example that comes to mind is Daredevil and the music that played throughout (lots of other shortcomings in that movie too, but the music in my case anyway made the difference from liking to disliking). Ruined is a serious word or state, though. But again, if you're not much of an x-men fan than tell me what it is that makes X3 so terrible compared to the other 2? The storyline may not be as good as X2 as an example, and maybe they didn't treat Phoenix nearly as wonderfully as Clairmont and Byrne did, but the overall tone and direction of the movie followed suit of the first 2. And Indy 4. It wasn't a trainwreck, it wasn't a disaster, it didn't suck. Could it be better? Sure, but it was much better than deserving the heaping load of virtual shit piled upon it online. It's so easy for people out there to be negative because something wasn't exactly how they envisioned it might be. I for one feel all of the Indy movies post Raiders fell short to exactly the same degree for one reason: they invloved Indy adventuring around with others as opposed to Raiders where he came in and out of contact with his companions but primarily was a solo adventurer (that is, he ended up with Marion and Saleh here and there but he initially set out alone, whereas he set out on adventures with others from the getgo in the the other 3 movies). I think his character is much more truly depicted as a lone adventurer, not worrying about others' safety, rather concerned with the prize or goal. But that didn't wreck the subsequent films for me. Nuked fridge a little far-fetched? Mutt a silly name? Yep, but Ford stood strong and it was a fun adventure flick. So why worry. I've gotta say one more thing here. The AIDS comment is in poor taste, man. Seriously, what if I actually had AIDS, or someone else reading here has it for that matter and it was claiming them, and they simply came here to enjoy a little outside of the personal holocaust of a disease like that? I'm not saying that overall you're a dick, and I will say that I enjoy reading your posts from time to time, but that was a seriously stupid and irresponsible thing to say and you should tone it down.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:28 p.m. CST

    Jonah Echo

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    You saw what Fred did over there? <p> Hee hee. Fred could not let the thread die without getting to number one - even for a only a little while.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:29 p.m. CST

    The Savages was mismarketed.

    by HoboCode

    It was sold as a comedy as much as a drama in my opinion. Nope. I'm pretty sure I didn't laugh at all during the film. Pretty sobering and depressing film actually. But quality.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:29 p.m. CST

    The savages...

    by Darwyn

    ...was a great little film. Highly recommend it. It's a bit like a play or book; very literary, not just in the characters but in the tone. It's a smart, dark dramedy that's actually really touching and heartfelt.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:30 p.m. CST

    Last Groucho - for now

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:31 p.m. CST

    Sort of like when Equinas shows up to the stables

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    Chaos ensues when we arrive Gilk, but we are nice guys.<p> We are like the aliens in ID4, but with better people skills and computers that have better antivirus software protection.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:32 p.m. CST

    HOD

    by Gilkuliehe

    At first I felt the same as your brother, but the characters won me over. Specially PSH. The guy starts really unlikeable, but you start feeling kinda sorry for him after the most vulnerable parts of his show up. (Not literally though, for that watch BEFORE THE DEVIL KNOWS YOU'RE DEAD) Laura Linney on the other hand, starts likeable and by the end had me completely in love with her... The last shot made me sob like a bitch.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:33 p.m. CST

    Riddick was sweet wish a third film came out...

    by andrew coleman

    Also I'm with Dickblood X3 is an awful movie. One of the worst in a long time.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:33 p.m. CST

    Savages: Scumbags?

    by HoboCode

    That's interesting. Hence the title's play on words? I think the charcaters are real, and not an ideal of what we would like to be in a crisis situation, such as dealing with a sick or dying parent. They're imperfect beings as human are, not to mention siblings who have inevitably bitch at each other or disagree. They are forced to make some tough choices and not everyone is prepared for that.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:36 p.m. CST

    Not to mention it was implied they're Dad was an asshole.

    by HoboCode

    And they hadn't spoken to him in years. For two people who felt they probably didn't owe him much they went above and beyong the call. The family in the beginning that abandoned the man after his companion died and. THEY were scumbags.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:36 p.m. CST

    HoboCode.

    by Gilkuliehe

    I laughed a lot during THE SAVAGES, specially the part where PSH hurts himself playing tennis. That was hilarious, man. Oh when the nurse said to the father "You be good now, Mister Savage". Somehow that made me laugh. I have no idea how they've marketed it, though.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:36 p.m. CST

    their. fuck.

    by HoboCode

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:37 p.m. CST

    Fred Savage

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    Great name for an actor

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:37 p.m. CST

    Laura Linney won me over

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    In the movie You Can Count on Me.<p> Great film that presents real people with flaws.<p> This sometimes can make the viewer either relate to what the character is going through or find them at fault.<p> I like a movie that makes you decide which way you want to go.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:39 p.m. CST

    Re: Scumbags.

    by Gilkuliehe

    You're right about scumbags, Hobo. The biggest one was the guy in charge of the old lady though, who gave shit to mister Savage for not flushing the toilet. Was that the guy from DEXTER? Anyway, mister Savage gives him shit in return. He.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:40 p.m. CST

    The Bank Job was better the more I thought about it

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    It needed to ferment in my mind a few days.<p>ThereWolf, before you go out of your way ordering stuff for me, wait until you get the kit first to see if it's to your liking. Since I'm sending your movies across the pond, it's not something I want to have to do frequently so your kit will be huge and is going to take me about two weeks to complete. If the kit meets your expectations, then you can consider sending me a spindle.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:40 p.m. CST

    Thanks Jonah

    by Shan

    Glad you liked it. <p> I can't believe how rapidly the posts are adding up onto this talkback. It seems to be seeing a *lot* of activity for one so far down the main page.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:40 p.m. CST

    Anybody see Diving Bell?

    by HoboCode

    Fucking great movie man.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:41 p.m. CST

    Must be the power of Vern I guess ...

    by Shan

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:48 p.m. CST

    With regards to X3, I bought it sight unseen

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    So it sits on my DVD shelf. Whether I'll ever watch it again remains to be seen, but the magic 8 ball is telling me "Don't count on it."

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:48 p.m. CST

    Okay, Hawaiian

    by ThereWolf

    Understood. I just hope I can bring something to the Asian movie discussion and it doesn't all fly over my head.<p>My DVD player does DIVX Ultra, if that's any help. Huge, eh? Good job I've got some time off coming up in 2 weeks...

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:50 p.m. CST

    Diving Bell

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    Sadly, I own it but haven't put it in yet despite countless people telling me to.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:54 p.m. CST

    Foghorn Leghorn and Groucho! Yes!!!

    by toadkillerdog

    I am googling their quotes now, and cracking up! You have good taste Fred.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:54 p.m. CST

    X3

    by ThereWolf

    Seen it the once. I didn't dislike it. Not as good as X2, I thought but maybe edging X1. And there's a fine music cue in there, Jean's theme, I guess and it packs an emotional wallop.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:56 p.m. CST

    Diving Bell

    by HoboCode

    If I might make a suggestion to those who have or haven't seen it yet. Watch it dubbed in English. Yeah yeah I know. To me it's normally sacrilege as well. Here though I think it enhances the film for the English speaker by giving the viewer more of the character's subtlties. Much of the movie is seen through the chracters one functioning eye and hence much of the dialogue is internalized any way. Just a thought for you.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:56 p.m. CST

    Well, hell bells, ThereWolf

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    If you can play DIVX files then I can get your package out this week. As far as the discussion goes, either you like a movie or you don't. Why you did or didn't is what we'll be endlessly discussing.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:58 p.m. CST

    Groucho!

    by ThereWolf

    "One morning I shot an elephant in my pyjamas. How he got into my pyjamas I'll never know!"

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 2:59 p.m. CST

    Arch Nemesis

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    You know what....you're right. The AIDS comment is in bad taste and I do regret it. AIDS shouldn't be used as just another piece of vulgar slang meant to insult others with differing opinions. I agree. I'll stop using it from here on in. I didn't really think about what that would feel like to say that to someone who actually had the horrible disease. <P> And as far as X3 and Indy IV.....frankly I'm tired of writing about both of them. I do not wish to discuss the many reasons why they both suck ass. But I will say Cyclops character was handled like shit, Professor X was handled like shit, Wolverine was suddenly a big pussy, Angel existed for no fucking reason, Vinnie Jones as Juggernaut, Rogue abandoning her only friends in the world, horribly written dialogue, terrible original score, shitty effects (greenscreen on golden gate bridge scene is unforgivable) sloppy pace. Yeah...there was not one good thing about it. The only good thing about that film was the decision to cast Kelsey Grammar as Beast. But of course....Ratner fucked that character up as well.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 3 p.m. CST

    X-3 - it is not horribly bad

    by toadkillerdog

    I have seen movies of equal or greater budget (with Directors considered superior to Ratner) that are far worse. Superman Returns anyone? <p> I truly enjoyed Xmen. A great intro flick. X-2 upped the ante - big time. Until TDK it was my undisputed favorite comic book movie. Now they are tied. X-3 though, it did not suck. But it felt rushed. It felt flat and like they were going through the motions at times. As bad as Superman Returns is, Singer is the better director. But X3 is the more enjoyable flick.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 3:04 p.m. CST

    Very good points about X-3 Danny

    by toadkillerdog

    Fred, you better put your popcorn away. Danny is sounding much more mature these days.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 3:05 p.m. CST

    Superman Returns is a masterpiece.

    by HoboCode

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 3:07 p.m. CST

    Groucho

    by toadkillerdog

    Will you marry me? Did he leave you any money? Answer the second question first. <p> (Talking about Margaret Dumont as Teasdale) Remember men, we're fighting for this woman's honor, which is probably more than she ever did!

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 3:07 p.m. CST

    Superman Returns sucked......

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    ...because it was a rehash of all the same shit we have already seen in previous Superman movies. Even Luthor's stupid real estate schemes. It was just boring because it didn't bring anything new and fresh. But IMO it was still a very well made, beautifully shot film. Just dull.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 3:10 p.m. CST

    Fred, you Foghorn Leghorn quotes made me think...

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    ...of a farm, and that in turn of a farm joke.<p>A farmer buys several pigs, hoping to breed them for ham, bacon, etc.... After several weeks, he notices that none of the pigs are getting pregnant and calls a vet for help.<p>The vet tells the farmer that he should try artificial insemination. The farmer doesn't have the slightest idea what this means but, not wanting to display his ignorance, he only asks the vet how he will know when the pigs are pregnant. The vet tells him that they will stop standing around and will instead, lay down & wallow in the mud when they are pregnant. The farmer hangs up & gives this some thought. He comes to the conclusion that artificial insemination means that he has to impregnate the pigs.<p>So, he loads the pigs into his truck, drives them out into the woods, has sex with them all, brings them back & goes to bed. Next morning, he wakes & looks out at the pigs. Seeing that they are all still standing around, he concludes that the first try didn't take, and loads them in the truck again. He drives them out to the woods, bangs each pig twice for good measure, brings them back and goes to bed. Next morning, he wakes to find the pigs still just standing around. One more try, he tells himself, and proceeds to load them up & drives them out to the woods. He spends all day shagging the pigs and, upon returning home, falls listlessly into bed.<p>The next morning, he cannot even raise himself from the bed to look at the pigs. He asks his wife to look out and tell him if the pigs are laying in the mud.<p>No, she says, they're all in the truck and one of them is honking the horn.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 3:12 p.m. CST

    "You are a true masochist my friend."

    by jim

    DGBD, like I said, I've seen Gigli. I will watch just about anything. I can almost always find some redeeming feature to make a bad movie, if not worthwhile, at least not a total waste of time.<p>Funny thing about Employee of the Month: it is basically the same movie as Grandma's Boy, another awful movie I had watched just a few days earlier.<p>I really liked "Grave of the Fireflies". However, due to the way the story is structured, I found the emotional impact of the film to be lessened as a result.<p>X3 to me was 90 minutes of missed opportunities. They had tremendous good-will thanks to X2 but instead of building on that, they pissed it away with a "let's throw everything at the screen and see what sticks" mish mash of a film. I've been a fan of the X-men and eager to see a movie for over 20 years. The first two, while not perfect, satisfied my X-movie lust. The third was a tease that left me with balls as blue as The Beast.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 3:12 p.m. CST

    And if that doesn't...

    by ThereWolf

    kill this TB stone dead, nothing will.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 3:17 p.m. CST

    Grandma's Boy came on FX network

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    I watched it.<p> Didn't like it and I doubt whatever slang terms and nudity that were in the cinema version would have saved it.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 3:17 p.m. CST

    Hawaiian Organ Donor -- Mr. Equus loves you for that joke..

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 3:19 p.m. CST

    reeal estate scheme?

    by HoboCode

    Creating an entire new continent and destroying a third of another one in the process is a real estate scheme? Gotchya.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 3:19 p.m. CST

    I think the only nudity was Jonah Hill's face

    by jim

    in some woman's bare chest for several hours at a party. Not an image you want to deposit in the spank bank.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 3:21 p.m. CST

    Good point, Danny

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    You think his horse sense is tingling and he's being drawn to this TB as we speak?<p>Wow, this thing would hit 10,000 posts if he joined in.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 3:22 p.m. CST

    Wow..I think this TB is going well..

    by Jonah Echo

    Seems like we are making a few new friends, and I'm now definitely seeing The Savages. And Danny, I think it was right of you to apologize for the aids comment. To see someone get called out and instantly respond apologetically, rarely happens, and it's cool that you did that. <P> I agree with your rule about comparable movies. Snakehead's Revenge and even something more high profile but in the somewhat same genre lke Doom are going to be held to slightly different standards.And certainly that will be true of something like X3. I also disliked it quite a bit, and thought it was a huge letdown. And I wasn't even really looking forward to it, except as an evening of entertainment. <P> Arch, I agree with your Indy IV comments, though Lucas has ceased to get any praise from me, I think Indy was a fun movie and good enough to earn a place in the series. I'm looking forward to the bluray release in October.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 3:23 p.m. CST

    Node

    by toadkillerdog

    It was a beautifully shot, boring film, with a dumb villain and an even dumber real estate scheme plot. <p>Yes real estate scheme. Sink half the continent, and sell new real estate on a rocky, crystalline, cut your feet too ribbons, kryptonite laced (which surprisingly does not prevent supes from lifting the entire thing into ace even though a shard damn near kils him - but I digress), ugly, dark, green tinged, cave filled continent.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 3:25 p.m. CST

    "Superman Returns is a masterpiece."

    by Xiphos_2

    of what?

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 3:25 p.m. CST

    that reminds me of a joke.....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    Koala is sitting in a tree smoking pot. Lizard spots him high up in the tree with a strange smile plastered on his face and climbs up to him, asking, "Hey Koala.....what's going on?" Koala tells him, "Awwww man...I'm just smokin' some pot. You want some of this shit?" He lets Lizard take a hit. Lizard likes it and sits up in the tree with Koala for the rest of the afternoon getting high as a kite. Eventually Lizard's mouth gets all fucked up and dry and he tells Koala, "Fuck man....I need a drink....save some of that shit for me." He stumbles off toward the river and falls in!! Luckily Crocodile scoops him up in his mouth and gently places him in the sand. He asks Lizard, "What the hell is wrong with you man you could have drown!!" Lizard explains he is crazy high right now after smoking that good shit with Koala. "A Koala smoking weed?!" Crocodile asks, "I gotta see this!!" Crocodile climbs up out of the river and over toward the tree where Koala is still sitting and giggling. Koala looks down at the Crocodile and screams, "Holy shit dude how much fucking water did you drink?!"

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 3:25 p.m. CST

    2 movies and still....

    by Blackguard

    ...they do not show HOW he became the Scorpion King!! <p> How do these keep getting made? I laughed my ass off when the scorpion was invisible. Like they just ran out of money. And who's idea was it to have Randy Couture as a main character? Let him be a minor character but not one of the stars. Also, they seemed to forget that they were in ancient Egypt with all the modern day wisecracking. It was just BAD. It makes me really appreciate Starship Troopers 3.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 3:26 p.m. CST

    I hadn't thought of that connection with Luther

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    In the first movie it's sending California out into the ocean. In the second movie he wants to be given Australia and in Returns it's the creation of new "real estate." That's dire.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 3:27 p.m. CST

    Danny...for some reason...

    by Jonah Echo

    that one has me laughing loudly. Well done. I think in my mind the Koala has the voice of Cheech Marin.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 3:28 p.m. CST

    Chitty

    by Xiphos_2

    Nudity goes a long way in saving a lot of movies, a looooong way. "Hair pie, thank you very much" and Juggs have made more then a few movies better then they should have been.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 3:30 p.m. CST

    Danny, that sounds like a Cheech and Chong joke

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    A joke about being high thought of by someone who WAS high.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 3:33 p.m. CST

    Not only "prequel to the prequel to the sequel to THE MUMMY"....

    by Lenny Nero

    It's a prequel to the prequel to the sequel of a remake.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 3:35 p.m. CST

    Superman Returns

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    I think it was a huge mistake to make it a partial sequel to part 2. I wanted to see more origin with some good development of Clark and Lois. Not just throw us right in and make us have to imagine that chemistry already existing.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 3:37 p.m. CST

    DANNY

    by Arch Nemesis

    Good form. Now, I'm not trying to drag X3 out because frankly it doesn't rank high on my list and I still haven't bought it on DVD, though maybe seeing it on the ginormous screen at The Fabulous Fox Theater with the fake starfield ceiling and a girlfriend who actually likes all this shit as much as I do made it more fun, but I do like it for what it is: a fairly believable real life reenactment of comic books I'd been reading for 25 years plus. Doesn't touch what's come out this past year but again, comparing apples to oranges. Regarding effects problems like the Golden Gate Bridge sequence I understand how that can throw a viewing off. I guess it really all depends upon the rest of the movie, i.e. SW Empire and Return of the Jedi's space sequences. Until the DVD release of the OT you had to endure the lines around the cutouts of virtually all of the starships in any space scene. That always bugged me but I didn't cry havok, still loved the movies immmesely(and in the case of X3 didn't love but still enjoyed overall). 2 Real points of contension. First, you love Wolverine enough to get upset over his portrayal, all I can say is that his character has other more subtle sides than just the badass, so in that case I'm glad they could write him in a way other than just in a straight line. The upcoming film will hopefully make alot more sense out of him as a whole. Secondly, re: Cyclops's truncated death/death scene, it's obvious from the very end of the credits that the movie was meant to be continued, so maybe an explanation or continuation was in the cards. That's all conjecture, but it felt obviously left to be hanging as was the last scene with Xavier. Maybe a case of to be continued like the Burton Planet of the Apes which never happened, much like Apes, because of bad ratings/box office takes. So there's a bit of a letdown like God didn't come down and touch my frontal scifi lobe so I file it somewhere else, namely good popcorn flick fun. Really though, I wonder if there wasn't meant to be a continuation of the Cyclops death storyline. After all they do it comics EVERY TIME. Now, on to another topic, I just realized that adding blue cheese crumbles (specifically the Amish ones you can find at Sam's Club) to gumbo does indeed rock the house. It cuts the spicyness just enough so you can acutally taste the salt aspect of the dish, plus adds a little bit of that savory-sweet side of the blue if you're using aforementioned sheep's milk cheese. Discuss.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 3:37 p.m. CST

    Superman Returns condones homosexuality...somehow

    by Larry Sellers

    Also it enables the word "retard." Discuss.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 3:39 p.m. CST

    Garfield Minus Garfield: The Movie...

    by Lenny Nero

    ...In which Breckin Meyer loses his mind.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 3:41 p.m. CST

    Danny's reminds me of another jungle joke

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    Elephant is walking along in the jungle and steps on a very sharp thorn.<p> Sure enough, the thord finds its way into a small crack in her foot.<p> She is standing in the path trying to pull it out, when an ant walks by and notices.<p> "Need any help?" The ant asks.<p> The elephant realizes the ant is small enough to get the thorn out of her foot and agrees.<p> The ant climbs under her foot and pulls out the thorn, much to the delight of the elephant.<p> "What can I do to repay you?" The elephant asks.<p> The ant thinks for a minute and asks "We'll I've always wanted to make love to an elephant."<p> The elephant thinks about it for a second and agrees, so the ant climbs up and starts going to town from behind.<p> About this time a coconut falls from a tree and hits the elephant on the head.<p> "Ouch!" she calls out.<p> To which the ant replies "Yeah, that's right, take it all baby!"

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 3:42 p.m. CST

    Arch Nemesis -- you truly are my arch-nemesis.

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 3:43 p.m. CST

    ChittyChittyGangBang -- Hahaha......I love those innocent

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    animal jokes. Those are the best.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 3:43 p.m. CST

    Is Garfield invisible because he is simply a

    by jim

    figment of John's imagination and not real? That would explain a lot.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 3:45 p.m. CST

    Fred only know one joke

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    Stop Fred if you heard this before - it a tad risque.<p> Lone Ranger is captured by an Indian Tribe (Native Amurrican). They plan to execute him. But in honor of his past exploits, they grant him three wishes. For first wish, LR walks over to his horse Silver and whispers in his ear. Silver leaves, comes back a few hours later with a beautiful red-head. LR and red head go into tent. Fred think they play tiddly winks all night long, but Fred not know for sure. Next morning, LR whispers into Silvers ear again. Silver goes off and comes back with a beautiful Blond. They go into tent - more tiddly winks -Fred assumes, take place. Finally, the Chief says, 'Lone Ranger ' we have been impressed with your wishes, but you only get one last one, what will it be?' LR slowly walks up to Silver, grabs Silver by the ears and says. 'For the last time, I said Posse!' <p> Hee hee <p> Fred apologize if anyone was offended.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 3:51 p.m. CST

    Howdy folks, lots of stuff huh?

    by kungfuhustler84

    I guess I'll give my two cents, not that anybody probably gives a shit.<p>First, I'm a little in awe that there is so much love on here for Chronicles of Riddick, and so muh hate for Indy 4 and X3. I personally consider all of them to be in equal ranges of suck. Depending on your personal history with the material, it could be worse or better. For example, X3 was definitely just as stupid and hollow as the other two, but if you're a fan of the comic (like me) it gets a lot worse. Cyclops, who has really been the soul and backbone of the team since the comic's beginning, was handled in an absolutely atrocious manner. I personally believe he represents the greatest of the X-men, so the fact that he was killed so early in the film just makes me feel like the filmmakers did not understand the material. Which really pisses me off. Frankly, I'm sick of Hollywood trying to make these movies using people who really don't understand the story, and are just out for a paycheck. So as an X-fan, the movie is really just awful and disappointing from every angle, with the exception of Beast. He just needed a little more screen time and I would have been happy (my favorite x-man along with Nightcrawler). From a cinematic point however, I feel the film is less flawed, and really stands as an average summer movie, maybe a bit below average. Overall, the movie is really a mess and doesn't even deserve more discussion when there is so much more thought provoking cinema out there.<p>Chronicles of Riddick is equally as stupid. Another example of style over substance and a sequel that fails before its predecessor. It had its moments, like the death by tin cup, but still ultimately failed for me. Somebody mentioned it would have been cool if the prequels had been more along the tone of the Riddick movie. I disagree completely. In fact, I think some of the problems plaguing the prequels in comparison to the original SW trilogy, can be addressed with the Riddick sequel. Made on a much higher budget, on a much grander scale, the Riddick movie lost much of the heart and soul of Pitch Black. Filmmakers no longer worried as much about creating mood or atmosphere with dialogue or subtle character studies. It was a lot easier to just have a giant CG ship flying through the shot and have everybody zipping around on wires around the sets. Which is exactly the problems the sequels had. Most of the original movies' spirit was buried underneath all these fancy effects and shiny objects.<p>Indy has the same problem, but really isn't as bad as most people on here make it out to be. It is the weakest of the series, sure, but that's really not saying much, since all of them are fun and entertaining in their own way. Shia, who was a worry for me prior to seeing the movie, really ended up being one of my favorite parts, with the exception of the vine swinging and the cactus nut-bashing. But those moments weren't bad because of Shia. I really doubt those mometents were his idea. I blame the Beard and the Neck for the stupid stuff. The stupid stuff, something present in every Indy movie in my opinion, and something that also adds to their charm. They are all goofy adventure movies with heart and lots of fun moments. KOTCS is the worst because it just makes the same mistake the prequels did, abandoning character study and plot for scale and style. Instead of watching more little moments like Indy with his Dad, or Short Round, or a tense fistfight with an enormour Nazi mehcanic, Indy is falling over countless waterfalls and watching UFOs fly around. None of those things will draw the audience to sympathize with a character, and none of them really do much to further the quality of the films.<p>This was a little ranting, and I know there probably a couple of parts that are hard to understand, or filled with run-on sentences but I felt like charing my thoughts with everybody.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 3:56 p.m. CST

    Riddick lost the heart and soul of Pitch Black?!!

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    Say whaaaaaaaaaaaaaat?! What heart and soul of Pitch Black? I think it was cool and all, but to say it had a ton of heart and soul is crazy. <p> There is nothing more heartfelt in those two films then the, "Are you with me Jack?" scene. Vin looks like he just watched his puppy get run over. Very very touching performance.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 3:57 p.m. CST

    re: Superman Returns

    by Arch Nemesis

    Overall execution of the film was great, Brandon Routh imo was great, story kind of rehashed really but my hope is the intention was to set up (after such a long break) for something completely new and different in the next film. I don't know, I get the idea of leaving the first 2 as canon, they were just iconic (especially if you're of the agegroup that grew up with these films in the theater as a kid as the director is). But I find it hard that you can deny one of the absolute coolest moments in the entire film, when superkid throws the piano at the thug in the boat. Moment had chills shooting through my spine, Fucking A cool.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 3:58 p.m. CST

    Chitty and Fred

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    I haven't heard those jokes in years and now I'm going to be giggling the entire drive home. Speaking of which, I'm done for the day. Time to sit in traffic.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 3:58 p.m. CST

    Indy IV vs. The Prequels

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    How anyone can say Indy IV is better than the prequels still shocks me. I say pick the worst 10 minutes of any of the 3 prequels, and that is still executed better than Indy IV as a whole.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 3:58 p.m. CST

    Arch Nemesis

    by Xiphos_2

    Large chunks of text are hard to read, so to make paragraph breaks, put the following where you want a break: < P > remove the spaces on either side of the P.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 3:58 p.m. CST

    i was just posting in the twitch thread:

    by chipps

    i'm a bit out of step. I couldn't get into salem's lot. I know it is a classic, and i did like the scene where the kid floats at the window. My favorite thing about the movie is that the house is situated on the cross roads. nice. i watched it as an adult though and most people who love it saw it as kids. also: if you look carefully james mason has a bunch of jars under the house, one of them has someone's testicles in it.<p>Plainview Rising. nice. i like. also i used to NOT like slow zombie, i thought the idea was dumb. now i do like slow zombies. i get it now. I thought the 28 movies were good, really like the new dawn, and i went out and bought a copy of sean. I do like the fact that the people are usually more evil than the mosters, and romero's stuff is just brilliant. anyway i don't have the same dislike of fast zombies as you guys have

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 3:59 p.m. CST

    Joke

    by ThereWolf

    Three friends go off into the jungle and get captured by cannibals. Cannibal King says to them "Go into jungle and each bring back ten pieces of fruit."<p>Off they go and Billy comes back first with ten passion fruits. The King says "If you can insert all ten into your anus without laughing, I let you go free." Billy gives it a go, gets to 3 and starts to giggle helplessly. They chop his head off and throw him in the pot.<p>Bobby comes back next with 10 red berries. The King says "If you can insert all ten berries into your anus, I set you free." So Bobby gives it a go. He gets to 9, but just as he starts pushing in number 10 he starts laughing. They chop his head off and throw him in the pot.<p>Bobby gets to Heaven and Billy's waiting for him. "I don't believe it You had it done, man. Why'd you start laughing?"<p>Bobby says "I just looked up and saw Johnny coming back with an armful of pineapples."

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 4:01 p.m. CST

    Pitch Black heart and soul

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    When he decides to help the people instead of watching them get eaten is what I think people are meaning by heart and soul.<p> He sort of likes being looked up to by the little girl.<p> He allows the girl and the priest a ride off the planet (great closing shot of the asteriod field).<p>

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 4:02 p.m. CST

    Danny

    by kungfuhustler84

    Superman Returns needed MORE origin? I'm pretty sure you already knew Superman's past along with everybody else on the planet. What else did you want? Some Smallville type shit like from that show? I think the origin handled in the very first Superman movie was brilliantly done. Smallville and Krypton were both beautiful in unique ways and helped the viewers to understand how Superman became who he was.<p>A lot of comic book movies are tedious because they spend so much time working on the origins of the hero. It's become sort of formulaic in my opinion. It's why so many comic book sequels are so great. They can jump right into the fun and just share more adventures with the character. There are lots of movies that just jump right into the action without even bothering with sharing how the protagonist got where they are. Origin stories aren't as neccessary as I believe everybody thinks they are, especially not for someone as universally known as Superman. Take Han Solo for example, one of the best heroes in movie history, and most people don't know Jack about his past unless they dig through a shitload of expanded universe stories.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 4:05 p.m. CST

    Danny

    by kungfuhustler84

    Pitch Black was all about Riddick's ruthless character and his methods of getting through a very sticky situation,which were usually far from the expected, and made the audience question him as a hero. That's the heart and soul of the movie. In COR, he is much more of the run of the mill hero, and it's a lot easier for the audience to simply root for him than consider any questions of morality.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 4:06 p.m. CST

    Super Kid Was Cool?

    by Xiphos_2

    He was one of the two biggests plot holes/plot devices in Stuporman Returns. How can the kid have the powers of a Son of Krypton when his baby daddy was fully human when he knocked up Lois Lane?<p> Remember, he went into the crystal chamber and gave up his kryptonianess to be a human.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 4:07 p.m. CST

    kungfuhustler84

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    I'm not talking rehash of the same Superman origin we have seen. I'm talking great little moments we haven't seen. Abrams had a lot of great stuff in his script. Moments with Clark and Lois together at a party in college and when they start dating.....romantic shit like that. I understand Returns is basically a sequel to 1 and 2. I get that thats the intention, I just can't follow it that way. I can't think of Bosworth as being Margot Kidder 2 years prior in the story. So I sorta just threw that other shit out and approached it as if this is a stand alone film. And from that perspective there is not nearly enough origin IMO. I'm not really speaking Superman (finding my powers) origin. I'm speaking more Lois and Clark origin.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 4:10 p.m. CST

    And because Pitch Black was made on a lower budget

    by kungfuhustler84

    it had to have SOMETHING besides a bunch of CGI like the sequel did. Having less to make a film with forces the filmmakers to be more creative with their methods and to think out of the box. More money usually just means more big effects getting thrown up on the screen and less creative little things happening in the movie. Pitch Black did this by playing with light and dark to create mood, focusing more on the characters, and when it did use Cgi, which is rare up until around the end of the movie, it was done to create the biggest effect with the least flash. Like when that one guy blows alcohol through the fire, illuminating all the creatures for a second. I can't think of one aesthetic moment like that in the entirety of COR.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 4:10 p.m. CST

    and I always find origin to be the most entertaining...

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    ...part of a comic book film. Iron Man for example would have sucked balls had he become Iron Man in the first 20 minutes. By the end fight I was already bored with his character. But I could have watched him test his shit and fly around L.A. for another hour.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 4:11 p.m. CST

    Xiphos

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    Fred not much like Superman Returns. But Even though Supes was mortal, he was not human, after coming out of the crystal chamber. So, his son inherited his kryptonian side. Yes, it is lame excuse. Fred's heart not really into defending a movie Fred did not like.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 4:12 p.m. CST

    I did

    by Series7

    Not Care for the bank job nor Diving Bell. Anyone else watch the deleted scenes for the Bank Job? The Diving Bell was good, I guess it captured what it would've been like to deal with that. I just didn't find it that interesting or enjoyable.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 4:12 p.m. CST

    Oh alright Danny

    by kungfuhustler84

    I get what you mean with Superman Returns. Still, I think what you are asking for then, is an entirely different movie.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 4:14 p.m. CST

    kungfuhustler84 -- yeah I am....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    I think Singer should have started an entirely new take on Superman. If he wanted to rehash the same shit....don't bother.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 4:14 p.m. CST

    DANNY

    by Arch Nemesis

    <P>So be it.</P> <P> Xiphos_2: Thanks, good point. Maybe I'll even go so far as to be <B>bold</B>. </P> <P>And in the spirit of joke telling, I will now pass on the only joke I can every remember: "A Budhist walks up to a hot dog vendor and says Make Me One with Everything." </p> QUICKLY NOW: name that movie!

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 4:15 p.m. CST

    I actually really agree with you in Iron Man Danny

    by kungfuhustler84

    the most fascinating part was seeing stark evolve and develop as a character. I think a sequel would benefit from following suit. Spending more time with his struggle with alcohol and self control.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 4:15 p.m. CST

    < B > bold < /B >

    by Arch Nemesis

    So much for html.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 4:17 p.m. CST

    Ask for a different movie

    by kungfuhustler84

    it's not gonna help the material of the one you have problems with magically transform into what you want. Superman Returns is what it is. I guess we can always hope the next one will meet expectations.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 4:19 p.m. CST

    kungfuhustler84

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    Yeah.....I didn't hate Returns-- it was just a so so movie. But it had a fucking wicked teaser and was incredibly shot, and I really like the casting (except for Space as Luthor...fuck him). It was just such a wasted opportunity.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 4:24 p.m. CST

    danny

    by kungfuhustler84

    I think you and I are in total agreement in terms of comic book movies. I guess I'm just in a ranty mood and was questioning some of the logic.<p>Criticizing a movie for failing to be another movie entirely instead of addressing the problems within the film itself usually is not a good way to judge a film. That being said, I do agree that Superman Returns was a miss. Are we ever gonna get a movie with Supes versus Bizarro? How much fucking fun would that be? I want a balls to the wall superfight complete with smashing buildings and creative airborne combat.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 4:25 p.m. CST

    Fred

    by Xiphos_2

    I thought the point of Soops going into the chamber was to make him completly human down to the DNA level. Now I could be wrong and I probably am because I haven't watch Soops 2 in a long time. I remember that was reason Soops made the ultimate sacrifice, to compleatly human. I see how maybe It could have been metaphoric maybe.<p>I still think the kid having powers is a suck hole of a plot point. I'll stand by that one.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 4:27 p.m. CST

    Xiphos_2

    by Arch Nemesis

    Yep, I thought so. I get what you're saying regarding plot holes, but then again Supes got his powers back in II so.... Anyway if you get the chance you should read the "final story" of superman which came out directly before John Byrne rebooted the entire DC series from scratch, I think it was in 1986 and I think (but could be totally wrong about this) that Alan Moore wrote the story. It has Superman lose his powers and take on a normal life married to Lois. They eventually have a kid and one of the final frames has the baby crushing a piece of coal into a diamond in his hands. The entire story is one of my favorite comic stories of all time, great wrap up with promise of a new spark. So as far as a Kryptonian having powers as an infant, superman writers have always flip-flopped on that: the original series had superboy where Byrne's version didn't give him powers until he was a teenager. Then there's the issue of Kara. Anyway you can also argue that Superman passed his super genes on to Lois, and whether or not his own powers had been neutralized this was still in his DNA.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 4:27 p.m. CST

    Xiphose -- I agree it is a suck hole....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    ...simply because where do you go from there? Its one thing to throw it in as a neat little gag...but thinking long-term. Okay the sequel is a few years later, is the kid now flying around town saving people? Does he go to school? Isn't that real fucking dangerous? How is it for Lois to try and discipline a kid that can punch her head off? All that weird shit ya know?

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 4:30 p.m. CST

    why Luthor?

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    After we've already seen him so many fucking times between the movies to Smallville.....fuck!! Why the hell would Singer sit down with the entire world and virtually unlimited funds at his disposal and say, "Here's what we're gonna do....we're bringing back Lex Luthor!!" How the fuck can any studio exec say, "Holy shit!! Thats a great idea!!"

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 4:36 p.m. CST

    Love me the Invisible Special FX!

    by Bash_Branigan

    GREAT idea. Can't wait until they reach the point of "Look out! It's a hologram--but it's invisible!" That would be the ultimate. Funny review, btw.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 4:37 p.m. CST

    han solo

    by chipps

    read the origin stories. wish i hadn't.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 4:38 p.m. CST

    I agree with you fellas

    by kungfuhustler84

    Giving Supes a kid is the stupidest thing they could have done because there simply is no real way to go from there. Superman movies should always be about Kal El and the thought of some smug little sidekick trailing along or something is enough to make me cringe. What I'm hoping is they just ingore that Singer even did that and go back to making some Superman morality tales. Responsibility vs. Recklessness. Superman vs. Bizarro. How can he eliminate this monster without endangering the people he has sworn to protect, when the monster keeps bringing the fight back to the city? make it happen cap'n.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 4:40 p.m. CST

    Arch Nemesis

    by chipps

    bicential man

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 4:42 p.m. CST

    exactly chipps

    by kungfuhustler84

    most heroes just don't need an explanation. They are who they are. Letting the audience formulate their own thoughts on their history is much more fun and gives the character that extra bit of cool. Take Sanjuro from Yojimbo and Sanjuro for example. He is so skilled, but his behavior and attitude is so different from most of the samurai of the time. it leads one to wonder why he is wandering from town to town and how he got to be such a master swordsman. It's really interesting stuff and it's fun to think about.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 4:42 p.m. CST

    Superman's kid

    by Arch Nemesis

    Just an idea here, but if they went with a decent Doomsday plot, which might honestly be hard to do unless it was a planned movie with a sequel, Doomsday could ultimately kill Superman's kid. Thus the morality play, Superman must kill etc.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 4:43 p.m. CST

    Yo, Chipps

    by ThereWolf

    How's the hangover?

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 4:44 p.m. CST

    Supes Kid pt 2

    by Xiphos_2

    I can't seem to let this idea go and Fred is probably right, but if the Machine made him human down to the DNA how could his yam bag yogurt make a super kid? When he spackled Lois Lanes womb with the Krytonian joy juice the kid would have to be human.<p>DGDB your post at 04:27:56 PM is what I was trying to get out but failed miserably in saying. Thanks for picking a Lame-O up.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 4:46 p.m. CST

    Though I still hold

    by Arch Nemesis

    that the bit with the piano really is my favorite scene in the film, I have to agree that the entrance of superkid really complicates the future for any films to be superman-centric.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 4:48 p.m. CST

    kungfuhustler84

    by chipps

    particularly someone like han solo, who is somewhat mysterious. You know that a lot of shit went down in his past. until you learn about it all, it seems almost infinite. then read all of the stories and you are, oh, is that it?

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 4:49 p.m. CST

    i've had my iced coffee

    by chipps

    so now i am fine.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 4:50 p.m. CST

    chipps

    by Arch Nemesis

    You win the no-prize.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 4:55 p.m. CST

    my favourite joke as kid, told to me by my uncle

    by chipps

    This kid, for his 8th birthday get a tommohawk (axe) and he is so excited the first thing he does is he goes outside and chops down the thunderbox (old stlye outside toilet). now the thunderbox is situated at the top of a hill and after the kid chops off the supports, it fall over and rolls down the hill, tumbling over and over, and landing in the creek at the bottom, then floating away.<p>hours later the boy has forgotten all about it when his father storms in. 'boy, did you chop down the thunderbox?' 'no" the kid says.<p> 'let me tell you a story. when george washington was your age he got an axe for his birthday and the first thing that he did was chop down the old cherry tree outside. when his father asked him if he had done it, he said - father, i cannot tell a lie. and because he told the truth, he wasn't punished'.<p>'now' the boys father says 'son, did you chop down the thunderbox?''father, i cannot tell a lie.' and with that the boy's father picks him up by the arm, and thrashes the shit out of him. in tears the boy says 'but george washington didn't get a thrashing' 'yes' the boys father says, 'but george washington's father wasn't in the cherry tree.'

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 5:04 p.m. CST

    good....ArcadianDS is a Roman Polanski rape apologist....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 5:09 p.m. CST

    I'm surprised that noone has brought up Mummy 3 here

    by Arch Nemesis

    We may catch it this week too. I'd actually love to here a few bashings and hate etc, it may help me lighten up to it some more.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 5:10 p.m. CST

    hear

    by Arch Nemesis

    blast

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 5:14 p.m. CST

    you guys hear the Downey quote about TDK?

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    "My whole thing is that that I saw 'The Dark Knight'. I feel like I'm dumb because I feel like I don't get how many things that are so smart. It's like a Ferrari engine of storytelling and script writing and I'm like, 'That's not my idea of what I want to see in a movie.' I loved 'The Prestige' but didn't understand 'The Dark Knight'. Didn't get it, still can't tell you what happened in the movie, what happened to the character and in the end they need him to be a bad guy. I'm like, 'I get it. This is so high brow and so fucking smart, I clearly need a college education to understand this movie.' You know what? Fuck DC comics. That's all I have to say and that's where I'm really coming from."

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 5:20 p.m. CST

    Chipps

    by Mavra Chang

    I never realized before what James Mason had in the jars (and I've had to have seen that movie at least 20 times). Good eye, man! Speaking of testicles, scrolling through to see what I've missed today, I saw the requirements for membership here (as posted by DGDB). Good thing I have some hanging on the wall. Is it okay if they have dart holes in 'em?

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 5:23 p.m. CST

    only

    by chipps

    if they are hitler's testicles.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 5:24 p.m. CST

    RDJ

    by ThereWolf

    I thought that Batman had to be the bad guy and break his own rules so that criminals would fear him again.<p>Am I wrong again? I do tend to ride roughshod over subtext. I haven't been to college either.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 5:26 p.m. CST

    Ouch!

    by ThereWolf

    Mavra!

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 5:27 p.m. CST

    He only had one, I heard

    by Mavra Chang

    These were old ones from my ex. He never used 'em anyway. OK....best to change that topic. Hmmmmm...."Movie Sequel of Your Choice" sucked. OK, now I'm in step with the group! Yes!

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 5:30 p.m. CST

    I wonder

    by Arch Nemesis

    how much he got paid to say that.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 5:30 p.m. CST

    i thought

    by chipps

    the reason was that he was taking the rap for harvey, so that other people would have him as an inspiration to seek non vigelanti style justice in gotham. that if harvey had fallen, anyone could, and there would be no hope of a white knight rising without a mask. Thus batman takes on the blame for harvy's crimes so that harvey still exists to inspire a new generation of DAs or whatever

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 5:31 p.m. CST

    Only movie I've ever walked out on...

    by Banzai Rootskibango

    ...was Battlefield Earth. I was 16yrs old and thought it was a big piece of shit. Still don't know how it ends to this day.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 5:31 p.m. CST

    Arch Nemesis

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    He was paid in Swedish Virgins. 12 of them to be exact.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 5:34 p.m. CST

    Hitler...

    by ThereWolf

    "... has only got one ball, the other is in the Albert Hall, Himmler has something similar, but poor old Goebbels has no balls at all!"<p>Old WW2 song. Altogether now...

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 5:35 p.m. CST

    Banzai

    by Arch Nemesis

    Okay, finally someone I can agree with about a movie truly sucking. Ahh, and with the click of a keypad I join the higher eschelon of movie bashers' anonymous.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 5:35 p.m. CST

    Don't think I've ever walked out on a movie

    by Mavra Chang

    Should have walked out of "A.I." I just sat there thinking it had to get better, but it never did.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 5:35 p.m. CST

    Fuck it, 400th.

    by Arch Nemesis

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 5:37 p.m. CST

    ThereWolf

    by chipps

    you're a brit arn't you. Britain is ahead of oz in the medal tally for the first time in 20 years, and we are unlikely to catch up. good shit

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 5:37 p.m. CST

    ThereWolf

    by Mavra Chang

    I don't know that song. Can you post the rest of the words?

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 5:39 p.m. CST

    Never walked out...

    by ThereWolf

    of a movie. Came close to walking on Batman & Robin but gritted my teeth and hung in there.<p>If I'd gone to see AVP:R at the cinema I wouldn't just have walked out, I would have tried to dismantle the projection booth on the way.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 5:39 p.m. CST

    or not?

    by Arch Nemesis

    Duped by the counter above. Speaking of above, anyone notice that a) the Indy statue is cross-eyed and b) that Clone Wars Target merch is being bannered on this site despite the supposed Star Wars embargo against AICN? I'm winding down here

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 5:42 p.m. CST

    i read that

    by chipps

    when the russians found hitler's burnt and unrecognizable body near the bunker, they identified it by checking how many ball he had. may be a myth.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 5:42 p.m. CST

    Chipps

    by ThereWolf

    I am indeed. I've not been following the Olympics all that much but the cycling has been outstanding. We've dominated that. Result!

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 5:46 p.m. CST

    Mavra

    by ThereWolf

    I think that's all the words. Could be wrong, but that's all I know.<p>To the tune of 'Colonel Bogey' I believe. Don't ask me to hum it.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 5:53 p.m. CST

    i'm trying to think of movies that have the song it them

    by chipps

    there are quite a few but i can't put my finger on one.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 5:53 p.m. CST

    ThereWolf

    by Mavra Chang

    I'll have to see if I can find it to listen to online. It would make a good addition to my MP3, right next to "Der Fuerher's Face".

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 5:55 p.m. CST

    that song....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    I'm pretty sure they played it during the climax of Blacks on Blondes #17.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 5:57 p.m. CST

    'Colonel Bogey' music...

    by ThereWolf

    might have been in Catch 22. I love that film but I haven't watched it in a long time. Alan Arkin, I think.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 5:57 p.m. CST

    DGDB

    by Mavra Chang

    Thanks, but I may wait to see if chipps remembers it from another film first. :)

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 5:58 p.m. CST

    Blacks on Blondes #17

    by chipps

    not as good as blacks on blondes #16

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 5:58 p.m. CST

    ThereWolf

    by Mavra Chang

    Great. I have that movie. Thank you!

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 5:59 p.m. CST

    ah ha!

    by chipps

    they whistle it in bridge on the river kwai!

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 6 p.m. CST

    Is that what that tune is?

    by Mavra Chang

    I didn't know the name.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 6:01 p.m. CST

    That should make it easier to find.

    by Mavra Chang

    Thanks to chipps as well. I forgot to say that before.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 6:02 p.m. CST

    Whoa, Mavra!

    by ThereWolf

    The music only - maybe - definitely not with the words sung along.<p>'sung along'?? That doesn't sound right.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 6:04 p.m. CST

    Well done, Chipps

    by ThereWolf

    Kwai. Why, oh, why didn't I remember that. I bet Catch 22 was something else entirely.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 6:05 p.m. CST

    ThereWolf

    by Mavra Chang

    I understood that, but it gives me a starting point to find it somwhere with the words. I probably would have remembered it from "Catch 22" if they had sung it. I like parody music and I've seen that movie several times.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 6:08 p.m. CST

    actually

    by chipps

    i wikied it. but i watch kwai about 6 months ago and i recently watched bridge too far and battle of britain and i knew it was in one of those older british movies.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 6:09 p.m. CST

    I found a set of lyrics in Wikipedia

    by Mavra Chang

    Has several sets of verses to it. Wicked!

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 6:09 p.m. CST

    next on the list

    by chipps

    the aussie ones. rats of tobruk and desert rats.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 6:11 p.m. CST

    Catch 22

    by ThereWolf

    "Help him."<p>"Help who?"<p>"The bombardier."<p>"I'm the bombardier."<p>Sorry, Mavra. I'm tired and I just panicked when I thought there were crossed-wires (looks sheepishly at his feet).

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 6:15 p.m. CST

    Yep, found the song

    by ThereWolf

    Excellent. Didn't realise there were so many variations.<p>Great. I can go to bed now knowing that Hitler's balls are in very good hands.<p>Goodnight!

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 6:17 p.m. CST

    ThereWolf

    by Mavra Chang

    No problem. We really got this topic off kilter! Major Major cracks me up. <p> "He can only be seen when he isn't there to be seen. When he's there, you can't see him." Probably twisted that quote.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 6:24 p.m. CST

    I hope I didn't chase everyone away

    by Mavra Chang

    It got pretty quiet around here. I'll be back later. See ya, chipps! And goodnight, ThereWolf.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 6:32 p.m. CST

    Fred decrys the lack of sensitivity around the testicle issue

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    Fred think people should walk a mile in Freds shoes before making testicles - or lack therof, a requirement

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 6:38 p.m. CST

    Vern Wrong Turn 2: Dead End was EXCELLENT

    by s0nicdeathmonkey

    one of the best horror films in recent years.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 7:23 p.m. CST

    Danny Glover and PSH

    by skani

    Dude, thank you for sticking up for MI3. I mentioned it was pretty good in the Moriarty Clone Wars talkback and got ganged up on big time. Where were you? Where were you!?! (single tear).

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 7:28 p.m. CST

    Downey Jr

    by skani

    Did he really say that about TDK? Man, that's petty. I think Downey's clearly awesome but also clearly a narcissist. Do you think he's just a little bit honked off onaccounta Iron Man was the toast of the town--best box office, best reviews--and seemed completely untouchable, and then TDK comes and ups the ante? Man, talk about petty.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 7:35 p.m. CST

    Typical?

    by skani

    Maybe typical hollywood narcissist wackjob behavior. He didn't have to say anything. He could have stopped at "I don't get it." He's way over the edge.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 7:38 p.m. CST

    Wrong Turn 2

    by Series7

    Was pretty sweet. Hatchet was a good DTV horror as well, so was Spiral by that same director but they may have gotten some theater play. But does 10 theaters really count?

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 7:40 p.m. CST

    Man

    by Series7

    All this talk of DTV and I am watching the middle man tv show. And Kevin Sarbo, star of another Dwayne The Rock Johnson created series that went to DTV, Walking Tall. Is looking kind of shapely. Kevin Sarbo's acting was made for DTV.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 7:47 p.m. CST

    Hatchet

    by chipps

    i just wish it was about a teenage boy whose plane crash lands in the wilderness and he has to survive with nothing but a hatchet. i loved that book

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 7:55 p.m. CST

    i suggest scientology.

    by chipps

    it's good for what ails you

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 8:03 p.m. CST

    i'm just saying, that if downey jr has problems

    by chipps

    he should try scientology. it's fashionable and good for networking. plus it's not crazy at all. not even slightly.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 8:22 p.m. CST

    definitely

    by skani

    I think we should get downey on zyprexa before the end of the day

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 8:23 p.m. CST

    chipps -- Blacks on Blondes

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    I completely agree....#16 was definitely the better of the two. In #17 all the dudes have to finish themselves off. I fucking hate that shit.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 8:24 p.m. CST

    Downey's quote....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    ....its completely true. Just search for it-- its all over the place. But I have no idea what the context was. He could have been laughing and clearly joking when he said it...I dunno.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 8:26 p.m. CST

    plus the storyline was contrived

    by chipps

    and the lighting was all wrong. there were script problems from day one.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:22 p.m. CST

    Yeah

    by Series7

    And Star Wars sold more tickets. Meaning more people saw Star Wars back in the day.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:27 p.m. CST

    Everyone needs to check this out

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    This is the coolest thing you'll see this week. Talk about a bunch of CGI nerds who love Star Wars with too much time on their hands.<p>http://tinyurl.com/5rpxuv

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:47 p.m. CST

    Wow

    by potvsktl

    You guys are fucking retards, huh? Go tell your giggly animal jokes into each others' urethras.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 9:54 p.m. CST

    Oh come on, LibWar, have a heart

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    You have to admit those were some nifty effects. The Imperial Star Destroyer flying over Golden Gate Bridge was a better visual than anything in the prequels.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10 p.m. CST

    that was pretty good

    by chipps

    it would effect the tides though. did you see the manson shit beside it. that guy is a bag full of crazy. i had to watch it a few times to even comprehend it it was so bizarre.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:01 p.m. CST

    deliciouscowbell

    by Series7

    Yeah I did, I was just being lazy and trying to sound smart.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:03 p.m. CST

    Although Evil, Charles Manson Was A First Rate Scat Singer.

    by chipps

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:04 p.m. CST

    Thanks Hawaiian

    by kungfuhustler84

    that was cool shit. It reminded me a little of Cloverfield. If only, they had made the movie about an Imperial invasion instead of a giant monster.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:04 p.m. CST

    Hawaiian Organ Donor

    by Arch Nemesis

    That was better than anything TV coukd possibly have to offer me tonight. Thank you.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:05 p.m. CST

    Hey HOD

    by Series7

    You ever used Trigger Street before? The web site?

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:07 p.m. CST

    Hahahaha

    by kungfuhustler84

    check out the new icon in the upper right. Harry with a collar bone and a defined jaw line. Yeah right Chubs.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:10 p.m. CST

    Damn

    by Series7

    I thought Harry's new icon was going to be The Big Shave, i guess it was a mix between that and TDK.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:26 p.m. CST

    hawaiian

    by chipps

    you have started me on an odyssey. somehow i have gone from tie fighers to george carlin on politically incorrect (where interestingly bill maher says he belives in god)

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:28 p.m. CST

    Vern clearly you need to get out more

    by Miyamoto_Musashi

    If you have time to watch and review this direct to DVD crap, clearly you dont have much else going on. <p> Can I suggest excercise so you don't end up like Harry or volunteer work.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:30 p.m. CST

    Miyamoto_Musashi

    by chipps

    how old are and or what part of australia are you from?

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:33 p.m. CST

    Chipps

    by Miyamoto_Musashi

    30 from WA but live in Japan

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:36 p.m. CST

    i was just wondering

    by chipps

    because i am from oz and i recently learnt an old friend has moved to japan, so i thought it was vaguly possible it was you, but since i am 26 from queensland it is not. thanks though

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:46 p.m. CST

    Miyamoto Musashi

    by kungfuhustler84

    congratulations on having my favorite name since Danny's. And damn you for thinking of it before me.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:47 p.m. CST

    can understand why your friend would move me

    by Miyamoto_Musashi

    the girls are incredible, whenever I visit Australia now Aussie girls look so fat. Have some American friends I work with from Ohio and they said don't complain about Aussie girls, their girls look like the Goodyear Blimp compared to Japanese girls.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:50 p.m. CST

    Kungfu

    by Miyamoto_Musashi

    No probs, am a big fan of Japanese history and loved the book "Musashi". <p> Already told my fiancee (Japanese) that if we have a boy he will be named Musashi, she seemed much more ok with that than me wearing a katana during our Japanese wedding.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:54 p.m. CST

    lol

    by chipps

    i knew a guy in school called Goodyer. fat guy. the blimp used fly over our school sometimes. we didn't pick on him, but he'd be telling the jokes himself.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 10:54 p.m. CST

    No Generation Kill talkback ?

    by Miyamoto_Musashi

    Love the show, one of my favourites of 2008

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 11:08 p.m. CST

    Generation Kill sucks

    by dioxholster

    it sucks

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 11:25 p.m. CST

    Musashi is a great book.

    by kungfuhustler84

    Glad to have met somebody else who actually read the damn thing. Anybody else ever gone through that book? Fantastic stuff. And the trilogy of movies is just about as good. Toshiro Mifune will forever be the greatest actor ever in my eyes. The man can do no wrong.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 11:35 p.m. CST

    Musashi is boring stuff.

    by dioxholster

    damn japanese coming here telling us to read their shit when we got perfectly good shit here.

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 11:40 p.m. CST

    the odyssey continues

    by chipps

    67% of idiots believe 9/11 was an inside job

  • Aug. 18, 2008, 11:50 p.m. CST

    hey dioxholster

    by kungfuhustler84

    I really love pussy. Can't get enough of it. Gonna tell me how much you don't like that too?<p>I agree, there are probably plenty of good books coming from "here" I am sure, wherever that may be (there are lots of Australians and British that frequent this site as well so I won't make any assumptions on that matter, unlike your gender), but don't let that be a reason to not explore literature from other cultures. There is some good shit out there. Trust me.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 12:17 a.m. CST

    i also don't like books that arn't from here.

    by chipps

    Jephson st in Toowong. If you're not from Jephson st, i don't wanna read your book.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 12:22 a.m. CST

    kungfuhustler84 stop ur bad influence

    by dioxholster

    democracy doesnt need weird books like that, and kungfu promotes violence which is precisely my point, troubled countries write books based on their experience which is mainly milking cows and raping their wives. so lets keep this weird japo stuff outta here,

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 12:32 a.m. CST

    I just

    by Series7

    Read a book and when I found out that it was written by a non American I took it outside burnt and then took a dump on the ashes.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 12:35 a.m. CST

    one time,

    by chipps

    i read this book by some foreigner called great expectations, and my penis fell off. FELL OFF!!!!

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 12:37 a.m. CST

    I have seen the error of my ways

    by kungfuhustler84

    Musashi is full of cow milking and wife raping. And uhhh... Communism.<p>Thank you for making it all clear to me diox.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 12:38 a.m. CST

    i used to be a christain

    by chipps

    then i found out the bible was written by FOREIGNERS!

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 12:40 a.m. CST

    This one time

    by kungfuhustler84

    I read this book by Reinaldo Arenas, and all of a sudden I heard this clatter and a squealing sound outside of the room, like a marmot got stuck in a dishwasher. I went outside to find my cat was ON FIRE!!!!<p>ON FIRE!!!!!

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 12:49 a.m. CST

    octagonproplex

    by chipps

    i saw both of those movies and thought they were passable but average. I don't find christopher lambert to be a good actor. I loved highlander and thought he was awesome in it, but that is about it. the lost battalion was ok. I think they put too much effort into selling the characters as 'gangsters'. In general it was a good movie with a few good scenes.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 12:55 a.m. CST

    Foreign books ARE full of crap.

    by dioxholster

    they try to measure up to ur books but they cant so they ramble on. these japos too know nothing all they want is sex androids and schoolgirls

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:03 a.m. CST

    you have to be taking the piss

    by chipps

    mark twain was a huge fan of Dumas, and went and visited the chateau diff. People would wait at the docks for the next chapter of Dickens to arrive. america has only been around for about 230 years. ALL books from before then are foreign. What about shakesphere or ceasar or suetonius or homer or virgil or or ...... ah whatever

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:12 a.m. CST

    books of Menacing ideologies

    by dioxholster

    is gonna corrupt the youth and change our world into the shit that is theirs. read no more if u want to salvage the glory that was ours. they think they are better but all these books shows insecurity and depressed motherfuckers who are looking for some pedophilian thing to do in thailand

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:13 a.m. CST

    Has

    by Series7

    Anyone seen Highlander the source? I've heard it was pretty bad. I remember I had a poster of a Highlander movie that never ended up being made that was only going to star Adrian Paul I wish I could find it. Like nothing happened for a while then that shit movie Endgame came out. How is it so hard to handle the Highlander series? You think those movies would be no brainers? Shit if they can make it to Land Before time 8, you think they could've done more with Highlander.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:19 a.m. CST

    also brainwash books

    by dioxholster

    one book i read from somewhere written by some foreign person, said this basically "life is what is here and no where. so it is better to run away with what you can carry before life takes you somewhere" - what is this shit, its trying to turn me into a shithead

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:24 a.m. CST

    Hey dioxhustler, wanna hear something funny?

    by kungfuhustler84

    AMERICAN novelist William S. Burroughs was an opiate addict who would frequently write about his own drug escapades, pedophile activity (not his own, but frequently associated with his novels' protagonists), and many other taboo subjects. This doesn't stop him from being an influential and great author whose works will be remembered, even after his death. So my point is two fold.<p> 1.) American authors are more than capable of the questionable statements you have claimed pertain only to "foreign" and "japo" authors.<p>And 2.) No matter the subject, if the author is of a high caliber, he or she is more than capable of producing a compelling intelligent story.<p>I'll try to resist wasting any more energy addressing your ungrounded and idiotic claims. Mainly because I'm pretty sure you're just writing that crap to get a rise out of people and don't really mean anything you are saying. Nobody can really be as ignorant and close minded as you are pretending to be.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:27 a.m. CST

    Just try to compose a proper retort you ass

    by kungfuhustler84

    So far all I can see is the rantings of a sheltered, uneducated bumpkin who wants somebody to just address him. Well you got me waiting here. Really, I would LOVE to see you actually come up with a proper argument.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:48 a.m. CST

    maybe you haven't figured it out yet diox

    by kungfuhustler84

    that was a typo. dioxholster, not dioxhustler. Don't worry, I just noticed it myself.<p>Still waiting for that intelligent retort.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:55 a.m. CST

    what are u talking about

    by dioxholster

    foreign books are lost in translation for a reason...because they suck and stink of failure. say all u want too but u know im right. plus these authors like to talk fascism all the time and pride themselves to be that way. there was this french author who was an s&m freak too and said america hates the world, well he is a freak and america hates u.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 2:03 a.m. CST

    Dioxholster - this guy for real ?

    by Miyamoto_Musashi

    Either way funny reading, and glad you are not at all ignorant. <p> Am sure your fellow Americans are proud to have you as one of their fellow countrymen. <p> And Generation Kill is American by the way, full of Americans, based on a book by an American.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 2:16 a.m. CST

    "but u know im right"

    by kungfuhustler84

    at least you didn't spell it "write."<p>Why the hell are you still on this TB baby? Didn't my big words and logic scare you? Are you not frightened of my experience in foreign literature and culture? Haven't you realized I am much more prepared to provide an intelligent argument than you without even having to rely on phrases like "they suck and stink of failure."<p>You have yet to site a single reliable piece of evidence for your claims. At least I have pointed out one American author who has the same qualities you sited as the faults of many foreign authors. But did you come back with an example to counter? Nope. With you it's always "this French guy" this or "that pedophile" that.<p>I asked for a retort jackass. That's when you reply back to me, hopefully in a witty or biting manner. At least make me laugh. Instead, you came back at me with a confused question and offered more repetition of the same idiotic rantings. I want a clear example for your claims, and I would love it if you actually addressed the points I made against your claims. And while you're at it, make papa a sandwich.<p>Move it along people. This bitch just got pwned.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 2:22 a.m. CST

    Mavra

    by ThereWolf

    With a clear head this morning I don't think the 'balls' music is in Catch 22. Think it's another one that goes:<p>"Be kind to your web-footed friends, for a duck maybe somebody's mother, she lives all alone in a swamp, where it's very cold and damp, well you may think that this is the end, well it is..."<p>Also circa WW2. Don't recall the name of the tune but it's well known.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 2:27 a.m. CST

    Fred

    by ThereWolf

    Many apologies for the 'testicle' references. Be reassured that it was part of a historical song research project undertaken by myself, Mavra Chang and Chipps and was not meant in any way to be personally offensive.<p>Sorry, Fred.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 2:27 a.m. CST

    also

    by chipps

    catch 22 is an american film about americans and the song was british

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 2:28 a.m. CST

    Time for work...

    by ThereWolf

    ... where internet access is strictly verboten.<p>Have a better one.

  • Then it fades to black.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 3:53 a.m. CST

    Can somebody give me a high five?

    by kungfuhustler84

    No?<p>Off to bed then. Toodles folks.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 5:54 a.m. CST

    Bank Job hate?

    by DocPazuzu

    WTF? <p> I thought it was a great heist flick. It also had one of the most satisfying beatdowns in ages when The Stath put teh pwn on the porn king and Craig Fairbrass. <p> Furthermore, when was the last time anyone heard Peter Bowles say "fuck"?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 6:33 a.m. CST

    the Minataur was great in Time Bandits!

    by the power of GREYSKULL

    Acted circles around Sean Connery... <p> When are they gonna give him his own spinoff already?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 7:05 a.m. CST

    good morning all..

    by Jonah Echo

    how is everyone?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 7:29 a.m. CST

    Interesting conversation overnight

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    I'm good Jonah, and you?<p>I posted a link up above for a nifty video that some Star Wars fans with too much time on their hands created. So I suggest you check it out to be amazed: http://tinyurl.com/5rpxuv<p>How goes it DocP? I watched the Bank Job late at night and I was fighting to keep my eyes open. So after replaying it in my head for a week it kept getting better. It is indeed a solid film.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 7:34 a.m. CST

    HOD..finished Warlords..

    by Jonah Echo

    What a fine film. Again, I enjoyed the score. Thing I noticed was the way it reflected a more American hollywood epic score. There were definitely moments where I thought Hans Zimmer had waltzed in and taken over scoring duties. Li and Lau were awesome as always. <P> Between this and Mongol, the other big epic I saw this year, I think I slightly prefer Mongol but this was well worth the watch, and I'm looking forward to having a movie night at my house soon where we show it, perhaps back to back with Daisy. <P> Two more films on the roster. Between Running Wild and Bloody Tie, which do you recommend? <P> Also, I said this yesterday but in regards to the next shipment, send me everything. That way I can have some movie nights and invite several people and spread the HOD gospel of asian film a little further.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 7:42 a.m. CST

    Anyone looked at the Harry DVD roundup..

    by Jonah Echo

    there are several things in there that looked like they were beamed in from an alternate universe. <P> Wizard of Gore with Crispin Glover? <P> Don Quixote, began by one of the greatest directors and finished by one of the worst? <P> A Steve McQueen movie I'd never heard of, and then Harry suggesting people actually watch "Hello Mary Lou: Prom Night 2"?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 7:43 a.m. CST

    HOD..

    by Jonah Echo

    Harry does mention a new Criterion film I very much recommend. It's called Twenty-four Eyes. It's a film about teaching, but it's a masterpiece.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 7:47 a.m. CST

    And the IMDB link for it..

    by Jonah Echo

    Great, great japanese film: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0047281/

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 7:49 a.m. CST

    new topic...best teaching films..

    by Jonah Echo

    I don't expect this to generate much, but lets see what happens. Anything involving education. <P> I'll throw out Lean on Me with MoFrees in it.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 7:52 a.m. CST

    Also lets hear it for

    by Jonah Echo

    Anne Bancroft in The Miracle Worker. I was a teacher for awhile, working in special education, and I think it was seeing this as a kid that inspired to even consider teaching as a worthy endeavor.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 7:53 a.m. CST

    Go with Bloody Tie first

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    It's a depressing gangster film and probably the least solid movie in your batch. Running Wild on the other hand is a by the numbers cop movie that is a great action ride.<p>You'll get everything in your batch, believe me.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 7:57 a.m. CST

    mongol

    by chipps

    I thought it was good. pretty inacurate but it is one of those 'true theory' things ie, plots the main story while making up the stuff in the gaps. one thing, though it is made out as a love story, Temujin is one of the most promiscus people in history. it is estimated that .25% of the worlds population is directly descendant from him. I found the ending really weird but it makes sense now that i know it is the first part of a three part series, or trilogy if you will. sign me up for the next two. and now for bed (cause in australia it's dark) night all, and remember, don't read foreign books or your penis will fall off.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 7:58 a.m. CST

    dead poets society

    by chipps

    hands down. and 'tom browns school days' which was very much like my own school

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 8:02 a.m. CST

    I checked out Harry's DVD column first thing

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    The Proposition on Blu-ray is yet another reason for me to get a player.<p>Favorite teaching movie? The Substitute, baby! I remember thinking Stand and Deliver was great, got many a laugh out of Summer School and bought into the schmaltzy nonsense of Mr. Holland's Opus.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 8:05 a.m. CST

    Stand and Deliver

    by Jonah Echo

    with Edward James Olmos. Goodbye Mr. Chipps of course. <P> O.K., Hod, I'll check out Bloody Tie. I'll probably play it on the computer tonight while Im writing. <P> Chipps,yea, the idea of showing Temujin as a doting and faithful husband is an odd choice, especially given the promiscuity thing you spoke of, but it's that relationship angle that actually elevates the movie above just another Conan take-off or faux historical battle epic.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 8:07 a.m. CST

    The Substitute! `

    by Jonah Echo

    Power percieved is power achieved! <P> Don't forget Class of 1999 wherein the teachers were cyborgs who eventually declared war against the students.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 8:09 a.m. CST

    Madadayo

    by Jonah Echo

    one of Kurosawa's last movies. It translates to "Not Yet" and tells the story of an aging professor. Great film, though more than just about teaching.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 8:11 a.m. CST

    To Be and To Have

    by Jonah Echo

    A documentary, with one of the greatest teachers I have ever seen, George Lopez, not to be confused with the comedian.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 8:12 a.m. CST

    anyone see Class of 1984

    by Jonah Echo

    where Malcom McDowell played the teacher that actually brandished a pistol while he taught class due to the wildness of the students?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 8:13 a.m. CST

    crap! Not Malcom...Roddy!

    by Jonah Echo

    I meant Roddy McDowell...it wouldnt seem wierd for Malcolm to have a gun in class, but Roddy!

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 8:24 a.m. CST

    I haven't seen any of those, Jonah

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    This is going to be a long day. I'm bloody exhausted.<p>So is the summer movie release season officially over?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 8:42 a.m. CST

    I think that after the Labor Day, it's officially over

    by Jonah Echo

    It was a great summer for movies, but it ended a little mildly for my tastes-or is ending mildly. I dont think Ill be seeing Babylon A.D. or Death Race 2000. Tropic Thunder, Tell No One and my free tickets for Mummy 3 will probably finish up this summer movie season for me, and I'll probably check out Get Smart at the discount theater. On to the fall!

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 8:44 a.m. CST

    So, as the summer season closes..

    by Jonah Echo

    what fall films are we looking forward to?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 8:47 a.m. CST

    My summer movies start next month...

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    ...with Speed Racer and Iron Man. Needless to say I'm jazzed.<p>For me it's been a great summer watching foreign films. It looks like 2008 is going to go down as one of the best years ever for film.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 8:49 a.m. CST

    Chitty - 30 second warning

    by toadkillerdog

    You know what's coming next!

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 8:50 a.m. CST

    Neigh means Neigh!

    by toadkillerdog

    Hah!

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 8:51 a.m. CST

    I think it has indeed been a good year

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    And I still want to see Man on a Wire.<p> But guess what? I will have to wait for DVD, as we do not get small release movies, just the wide releases.<p> Bummer.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 8:52 a.m. CST

    Oh yeah another thing

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    Neigh means Neigh Toad!<p> I'm only down 10-7 right?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 8:52 a.m. CST

    HOD..thanks to you..

    by Jonah Echo

    many of us spent our summer watching foreign films. HOD, add Son of Rambow and The Fall to your "summer movie" roster. SOR opens next week, and The Fall the first or second week of September. They are both two of the best things released this past summer.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 8:54 a.m. CST

    Daaaammmmmmmiiiittttt!!!!!

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    Foiled again!<p> I was jumping back and forth to the article about Great White being anchored out to sea by Universal.<p> You know me and creature features, I had to check that story out.<p> Anybody seen it?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 8:55 a.m. CST

    Fred is here

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    There is a TB named Fred! Fred is happy.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 8:56 a.m. CST

    Muuhhahhahahhahhhh!

    by toadkillerdog

    11-6 Chitty!

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 8:57 a.m. CST

    Good question, Jonah

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    Not like I'll see any of the fall stuff until next year, but I'm looking forward to:<p>Burn After Reading<p>Appaloosa<p>What Just Happened<p>Miracle at St. Anna<p>Max Payne<p>Body of Lies<p>RockNRolla<p>The Brothers Bloom<p>Quantum of Solace<p>Nobel Son<p>And then I think after that we're into the winter.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:01 a.m. CST

    Burn After Reading

    by Jonah Echo

    and Appaloosa are right at the forefront of the fall, and near the top of my list. I'm loving this potential tradition of giving us some new westerns every fall. After last year providing 3:10 to Yuma and Jesse James, and now Appaloosa, I'm hoping they find a way to keep this going. Never enough westerns in my opinion. Also, am I the only one who feels like Ed Harris and Viggo are the same person, just one is younger and one is older.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:02 a.m. CST

    I'm not a Spike Lee fan..

    by Jonah Echo

    but Miracle at St. Anna looks like a must see.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:06 a.m. CST

    Appaloosa looks terrible.

    by HoboCode

    I was not impresses by the overly long trailer that showed half the movie.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:07 a.m. CST

    Eagle Eye is also on my list..

    by Jonah Echo

    It looks a bit Matrix-y, but I've enjoyed most of what D.J.Caruso has done thus far, and this looks like a great fall action flick. <P> Also, lets not forget the bleak sci-fi Blindness. I'm up for that too. <P> And The Duchess, with Kiera Knightley, who I think is good enough, she could be relegated to period films forever and do great work there. <P> Heck, Im even sort of interested in Ghost Town.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:14 a.m. CST

    City of Ember looks awesome..

    by Jonah Echo

    I love those very visual, artificial environment films and I think Gil Kenan's Monster House was just awesome, so I'm looking forward to it. It helps that the book it is based off of is actually very good. <P> Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist looks interesting. As does Passengers, which is the only movie currently on the fall roster that looks like a competent creepy film. Where are the horror movies? <P> And don't say Quarrantine or Saw V. I already saw Rec. and never made it past the first Saw. <P> Here is the mission for this TB. Find out what happened to Trick R' Treat. Anyone remember this? If you don't search the site, youtube the trailer, or pull out your 300 dvds and watch the previews. This looks like the perfect Halloween pic, and it was supposed to be released last Halloween. WHERE. IS. IT?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:15 a.m. CST

    that Star Wars video....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    ...is fucking awesome. The hand-held match moves really sell it. Great job.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:16 a.m. CST

    by Jonah Echo

    I've seen Great White. It's wierd that it's been sort of exiled as it has, since it bears no real threat to anyone. It isnt great or amazing, but I guess it would be threatening to the Jaws franchise, since it's definitely better than parts 3 or 4. I always sort of enjoyed Jaws 2, so I think it's inferior to that, but otherwise it was fun. It isnt really worth hunting down though, and no one is missing anything amazing by having not seen it.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:17 a.m. CST

    Blindness

    by HoboCode

    Pretty much the only movie I'm lookign forward t othis fall.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:18 a.m. CST

    Awwww fuck AN AMERICAN CRIME....NOOOOO!!!!!

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:18 a.m. CST

    City of Ember sounded awesome at first....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    ...but the design in that trailer looked really weak to me. Bill Murray looks totally wasted in that role (not drunk). I just thought it would look more fantastic to the eye....and it doesnt.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:19 a.m. CST

    Eagle Eye was better the first time I saw it.

    by HoboCode

    When it was called Nick of Time.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:20 a.m. CST

    sign me up for....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    Max Payne, Bond, and RockNRolla...

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:20 a.m. CST

    and Benjamin button

    by HoboCode

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:20 a.m. CST

    Nick of Time is great.....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    One of the forgotten Depp films. Walken kicked ass in that movie.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:21 a.m. CST

    Body of Lies and Brothers Bloom

    by Jonah Echo

    both look very good. Also, I think there is a sailing doc, Morning Light coming soon? That has potential too. <P> There is Eastwood's The Changeling but I'm waiting to hear more.Same for Synechdoche, NY<P>

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:21 a.m. CST

    Ed Harris and Viggo play tortured soul very well

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    I don't ever get tired of westerns. And I'm looking forward to watching the goofy Asian take with Tears of the Black Tiger, Western Sukiyaki Django and The Good, the Bad and the Weird.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:22 a.m. CST

    Nick of Time..

    by Jonah Echo

    doesnt appear to bear any resemblance to Eagle Eye. I did like Nick of Time when I saw it.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:23 a.m. CST

    Synechdoche, NY -- this is the new Kaufman film right?

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    Dude I'm all over anything Kaufman touches. And this is his first directing gig.....sounds interesting.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:24 a.m. CST

    City of Ember

    by HoboCode

    Yeah the idea is intriguing but the trailer is so OVER THE TOP. Trying too hard me thinks. Might be good though.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:25 a.m. CST

    Max Payne, Quantum of Solace

    by Jonah Echo

    look good. The Road is on my must see list. Transporter 3=why not? <P> Australia and The Soloist also look intriguing.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:25 a.m. CST

    how does Eagle Eye look Matrix-y?

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    It just looks gimmicky and crappy.....but I don't see the Matrix-y. The only good thing Caruso has ever done is Salton Sea, and even that is just moderately good. Its not amazing. Did you see that sports betting movie he did Jonah?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:25 a.m. CST

    Jonah

    by HoboCode

    Except for the near identical plots you mean? Somebody pulling the strings on innocent civilians to carry out an assasination plot?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:26 a.m. CST

    I knew you would love that SW video, Danny

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    After seeing that I'm convinced I could watch an 8 hour movie of Star Wars vehicles inserted into our city skylines.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:26 a.m. CST

    the good the bad the wierd?

    by Jonah Echo

    Ive seen django and tears but what is this one?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:26 a.m. CST

    Hobo -- Ember trailer over the top?

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    Really? See I thought it wasn't over the top enough. I thought the photography looks really flat and stiff for that sort of film. The entire world felt like a brand new set. It didn't feel lived in at all from the trailer. And the lighting is just flat and Hollywood standard.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:26 a.m. CST

    The Road

    by HoboCode

    shit yeah that looks good. I need to read that book.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:28 a.m. CST

    Hawaiian Organ Donor

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    Yeah...there is something strange and hypnotizing about that. The image of the walkers coming at us from a distance is always great. You know what would be bad ass...if these guys had the time and resources, to make a five minute short of the walkers and ties just fucking pummeling an American city. Tons of explosions and crazy shit going down as the ties zoom by and drop bombs on buildings and blast everything in site. That would be crazy cool.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:28 a.m. CST

    Yep, Burn After Reading looks good

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    As does Quantum of Solace.<p> Also in the Great White talkback someone mentioned rumblings of a Jaws remake?<p> Dear God, had anyone else heard of this?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:29 a.m. CST

    Hobo..by that thinking

    by Jonah Echo

    there are dozens and dozens of identical plots. Also, from what I understand is that Eagle Eye goes in a completely different direction. However, even if they utilized the EXACT same setup, the scope of Eagle Eye as opposed to the time frame experiment that was Nick would make each very different. Two different approaches. I mean, you could start throwing in Manchurian Candidate into this mix as well, based off the slim critera you provided. Not trying to argue, just pointing out, that in this case I think the differences will be more apparent when the film is released.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:29 a.m. CST

    DGDB

    by HoboCode

    I agree the whole think looks like a studio set and that is partially becasue of the shit photography. What I meant was the trailer is selling it like it's a summer blockbuster (what with it's chanting screaming choir music and, flash cuts, and swooping camera angles) when it probably is not nearly that ambitious.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:30 a.m. CST

    Here's a review for Good, Bad, Weird, Jonah

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    It probably won't be out for a few months yet as it just finished it's theatrical run.<p>http://tinyurl.com/6s2qf9<p>The site is also a great way to keep up with films that fly under the radar.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:31 a.m. CST

    Danny..regarding Ember..

    by Jonah Echo

    if it's close to the book, we haven't seen all that much from the trailer, especially regarding the world.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:31 a.m. CST

    Imperial Walkers tearing thorugh a city

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    Now that would be badass.<p> Sort of like the tripods in War of the Worlds.<p> Only with an extra leg and better stomping ability.<p> Cruise get your running shoes ready.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:32 a.m. CST

    Fair enough Jonah.

    by HoboCode

    Eagle Eye just lloks uninteresting to me. Looks like another generic Hollywood star vehicle to me. I might rent it just to make googly eyes at Michelle Monaghan. I hope she starts making more films where she actually acts though. She was amazing in Gone Baby Gone.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:34 a.m. CST

    Danny..

    by Jonah Echo

    I'd say Matrixy because of the getting the cell phone telling you the world is not what you think, climbing onto a ledge, having the billboards address you, and knowing that in the second half of the film some world-changing, reality(or perception) altering thing is supposed to be revealed. That's Matrix-y. Or at least the good parts, not the slo-mo fu.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:34 a.m. CST

    Jaws remake to be directed by Renny Harlin (confirmed)

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    I keeed I keeed...

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:35 a.m. CST

    Body of Lies

    by HoboCode

    I have seen two trailers for this film now and have yet to figure out what the movie is even about. They were shooting it here in DC for a long time though so my curiosity is peaked.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:36 a.m. CST

    Jonah Echo

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    Oh yeah...I forget about that billboard thing. You know what that reminded me of-- The Game. It looks like a child remake of The Game. And I know Shia is like 30....but he still looks 10 and he should be forced to make nothing but children's films for the rest of his career. May he rot in hell...

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:36 a.m. CST

    Hobo, you might be right..

    by Jonah Echo

    I hope you arent, though. I'll probably wait and hear reviews to see exactly what kind of movie it is. I didnt see Disturbia because of it's obvious relation to Rear Window, but when I fnally saw it, I thought the film was a good entertaining pic. Not brilliant, but a fun homage of sorts to Hitchcock. And yes, homage or take is a better way to describe what it did than rip-off.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:37 a.m. CST

    "It looks like a child remake of the Game"

    by Jonah Echo

    Danny, you are awesome.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:38 a.m. CST

    I'll take MEG, but please no Jaws remake

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    Thanks for almost giving me a heart attack Danny.<p> I was about to dispatch Ninja Fred for mission to Hollywood.<p>

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:38 a.m. CST

    Jaws remake.

    by HoboCode

    Man don't even joke about that.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:39 a.m. CST

    and Shia is more like 22

    by Jonah Echo

    not 30. I agree he seems too young to play the character here.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:40 a.m. CST

    Soeaking of the Game...

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    Surviving the Game was on last night.<p> I always enjoyed that movie for some reason.<p> Good schlock indeed!

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:40 a.m. CST

    Jaws is one of the films I wouldn't mind a shitty remake of....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    I think it would be pretty fun to watch the same premise with the three of them on a boat, but with much more ridiculous shit going down, like a shark-human hybrid or some shit. It wouldnt affect my viewing experience of the original in the least. Its the same way I can enjoy 3 and 4 for the cheese they are.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:41 a.m. CST

    Disturbia

    by HoboCode

    It was mildy entertaining and the girl in that movie was HOT. Nice couple of bikini shots. It was pretty much Rear Window: TNG but they billed it as such.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:43 a.m. CST

    Jonah -- 22 or 30.....he looks like he is 10!

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    His facial hair looks like the hair creeping up the side of my penis, and the hair on his head looks like the hair on my nuts. Two very different textures. Neither of them good, especially for close-ups.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:43 a.m. CST

    Ninja Fred ready for a mission!

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    Have popcorn, will travel.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:45 a.m. CST

    some people have far too much time

    by Jonah Echo

    http://www.notafishinglure.com/SinCity.html

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:46 a.m. CST

    You could have Deep Blue Sea 2: Rise of the Sharks

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    LL and Jane sew Burrows back together with fishing line and C4 putty and you have the three on a boat.<p> End of the movie is both men have enough of her condecending attitude and toss her into big sharks mouth.<p> Jane and LL detonate her with leftover car battery and jumper cables.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:46 a.m. CST

    Danny..it's all true..

    by Jonah Echo

    In fact I think Eagle Eye will prove whether or not people can accept him as even a proto-adult. I kind of think that part of the film won't work.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:47 a.m. CST

    what the hell happened to Burrows? Saffron right?

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:48 a.m. CST

    shark human hybrid was already done..by Benchley no less

    by Jonah Echo

    Creature with Craig T. Nelson. Blargh!

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:48 a.m. CST

    and the Monaghan chick is like his dish in Eagle Eye?

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    Are they going to address the fact that she is over 10 years older than him...or are they both supposed to be like 17?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:51 a.m. CST

    Sandee Westgate.....film critic...have you guys seen her?

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    Kinda sorta work safe....but just be cautious. <p> http://tinyurl.com/6n4xz3

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:52 a.m. CST

    I don't mean to get all political up in this beyotch

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    But Danny, me thinks you'll love this article from CNN. That news organization is a rag but I always get a kick out of Cafferty.<p>http://tinyurl.com/5pzv6y<p>I haven't seen a smackdown like this since Tony Jaa ascended a staircase.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:52 a.m. CST

    I read that book Jonah

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    Benchley at his best.<p> Turns out the hybrids were going to be used for war, but were thrown out.<p> Book was at least better than movie.<p> But the best adaptation so far was The Beast about the giant squid.<p> Pretty damn decent for a TV movie.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:54 a.m. CST

    McCain will pursue Obama "To the gates of hell....."

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    Hhahahaahahaha....thanks for the laugh HOD!!!

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:54 a.m. CST

    Chitty..

    by Jonah Echo

    I thought Beast was a letdown, save for Larry Drake, who played a sea captain so grizzled, he held his pants together with a giant piece of sailing rope.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:55 a.m. CST

    sounds like Obama will pick Uncle Joe Biden....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    ...me thinks.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:55 a.m. CST

    Sandee Westgate? The porn star?

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    She's a film critic to boot?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:55 a.m. CST

    is she a porn star?

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:57 a.m. CST

    Not Tim Kaine?

    by HoboCode

    although he jus ta nnounced a budget shortfall in VA. might not look too good. Obama should pick Ted Strickland.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:58 a.m. CST

    I have seen The Beast twice

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    Once when it first appeared and again on the Sci-Fi channel.<p> Enjoyed both times.<p> I kind of like the idea of gaint killer squid.<p> It was something different for a change.<p>

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:58 a.m. CST

    its either Biden or Bayh I think.....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    ...but Bayh is young and inexperienced as well, and he looks just like John Edwards. He needs an old timer to level him off.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:59 a.m. CST

    It seems we've gone link crazee today

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    My money is on Joe Biden. He's got the experience Obama doesn't.<p>Talk about an interesting election. We have a two candidates at opposite ends of the age spectrum who will end up choosing running mates that are much younger/older to balance the ticket out.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10 a.m. CST

    chitty...

    by Jonah Echo

    I liked the way in which The Beast sort of ended up being like Gorgo or Beowulf, with the mama showing up to wreak havoc.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:01 a.m. CST

    Add The Beast to The Perfect Storm

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    Bam! Instant Classic.<p> But I guess any creature added to almost any movie would achieve the same results.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:02 a.m. CST

    Last I checked she's a porn star

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    I don't understand why Jim Webb didn't want the job.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:03 a.m. CST

    Chitty that is a great concept....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    Instead of the main dudes being oceanographers or scientists or knowing what they hunting.....they could just be an old fishing boat roughing it in the rough sees for the first hour until some crazy ass beast shows up and starts tearing up and raises hell. That would be scary if the entire thing were in one night in the pouring rain in a crazy storm. Scary fucking shit.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:03 a.m. CST

    that westgate movie critic

    by Jonah Echo

    thing seems like someone's jokey riff on Script Girl.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:04 a.m. CST

    I think Westgate has been around longer.....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    ...I've seen her for almost a year.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:04 a.m. CST

    You don't mess with mama! or daddy!

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    Always loved how writers would add a baby creature to film then kill it off, just to give their creature emotional depth and added motivation.<p> Sort of like Orca.<p> If I was baby creature in film I would be nervous.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:07 a.m. CST

    best line of the TB:If I was baby creature in film I would be ne

    by Jonah Echo

    Danny and Chitty-the monster hiding in the storm. I wrote a story like that back in college. Won a writing contest with it. I'll see if I can't dig it up.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:09 a.m. CST

    Chitty....it works though...

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    I fucking love Orca because of that strong emotional moment of the dad watching the wife and kid be killed. Even though Jaws is obviously the better of the two films, I empathize and sympathize with both Richard Harris and the Orca, a lot more than I do any character in Jaws. Its just a stronger emotional film for me.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:10 a.m. CST

    The Beast and The Perfect Storm

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    Exactly Danny!<p> I would like to see how a grizzled bunch of fishermen would handle the beast.<p> Instead of trying to study it or worry about why it was there, they would be figuring out 100 ways to fuck it up.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:12 a.m. CST

    it even worked in The Lost World..

    by Jonah Echo

    but funny that they botched it in Godzilla. When Big G looks down at one of it's thousands of babies laying there blown and dead, and then levels a howl of rage I burst into laughter.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:14 a.m. CST

    True Danny I did root for Orca

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    Of course I root for all creatures in the movies, except for Jaws, where I loved Quint, Brody and Hooper.<p> I have never rooted harder for a creature than the shark in Jaws 2 to eat that girl that just sat there and screamed (you know sparrow tits.)<p> I also rooted very hard for the monster in Cloverfield.<p>

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:15 a.m. CST

    NEW TOPIC

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    Pet peeves in film. And no, I don't mean being duped out of hard earned money for a crap movie. More like things that frequently show up that are stupid, lazy or poorly done (i.e. not finishing the killer off when he's been knocked out or shot and leaving the gun at his side).<p>I gotta go with recordings/flashbacks that use the exact same movie footage we saw earlier.<p>Nothing is worse than security camera footage that shows us the scene we saw earlier not from a security camera viewpoint but from the actual camera.<p>And then when a character is remembering a conversation they had earlier and we get the exact same footage except it's either black and white or washed out. unless you have a photographic memory you won't remember the conversation word for word or how the room looked or even what the person was wearing. For me it would be refreshing to see a memory sequence where things were a little off than what they actually were.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:15 a.m. CST

    It's very strange you guys are thinking that..

    by Jonah Echo

    my story involved some hard-up long shoremen who end up in a major storm, lose their bearings and are attacked by a "thing". They manage to catch it, sort of, and have it knocked unconscious dragging it behind their boat. And when they thought it safe, spectral, supernatural things started happening to them. More like a haunting on the boat. And the story continues from there. <P> After I wrote it I ended up seeing two things that were slightly similar to the last part-one wasn aold Outer Limits episode called Tourist Trap, and the other was a fim with Rhada Mitchell called Visitors.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:15 a.m. CST

    Fred read a funny line on American Carol TB

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    It was from liberal warrior. "The Warrior aint no damn librarian"

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:17 a.m. CST

    yeah the Lost World baby T-Rex worked well...

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    ...I fucking love that shot when Julianne opens the trailer door holding the baby, to the giant fucking face of the T-Rex Momma. Fuck that was tense...

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:18 a.m. CST

    Fred loved the puppet creature in V

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    He got no love at all though and he bought the farm.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:19 a.m. CST

    pet peeves....ROMANTIC MONTAGES

    by Jonah Echo

    set to some either old 70s song, or some latest new crap pop song. And it's not the montage itself always, it's when a particularly poorly written romcom(or any movie) decides to use the montage as a substitute for the burgeoning relationship. Ever see a flick where the two obviously intended couple hate each other and then *BOOM* montage and after they are ready to go off and get hitched.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:23 a.m. CST

    Perfect peeve, Jonah

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    Montages for the most part are lazy.<p>I accept them in action movies where the hero has to build something and we see quick cuts but to show us character development without actually showing us the details is lazy writing.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:25 a.m. CST

    HOD

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    Dude that is so fucking weird you said the camera POV thing....that is one of my biggest complaints about films. And its in massive films like Spider-Man that have no excuse to not shoot just one more angle!! There is the scene when Peter gets bit by the radioactive spider and he asks Mary-Jane if he can take her pic for the school paper.....she says sure and then starts posing for the camera and it cuts to his camera POV which is the same fucking single on her!! And she is not looking into the camera posing like she was on the wide, she is looking off camera at Peter-- yet we are meant to believe this is his POV we're watching. BULLSHIT!!! Its in like almost every fucking film....and its retarded.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:29 a.m. CST

    Jonah Echo

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    Wait wait wait.....you have a problem with the montages where couples are suddenly madly in love-- yet you like Indy IV? The sudden family dynamic was the foundation of my hatred for that film. Out of nowhere "Indy...Mutt is your kid." Indy looks at Mutt-- then at Marion and figures, "Oh ok....so now you're my girl again right and we're just one happy family....right?" He just instantly hugs her and suddenly they are an item?! What the fuck? What if she was dating someone....he didnt even ask.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:32 a.m. CST

    peeve

    by HoboCode

    double takes of action. seeing a car flip over and then seeing the same flip from a different camera angle immediately afterwards.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:35 a.m. CST

    not something I hate....but something thats funny....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    The map tap. Watch any scene where the characters are looking at a map. I love the close up of the index finger sliding across the route they will follow and when it gets to the destination, it usually does two taps. Its hilarious. There is a scene in LOTR Two Towers in the cave with Faromir....where they are plotting some course, and I swear there are like 4 back to back map taps. "We must travel here.....to here." Tap tap.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:36 a.m. CST

    Danny..

    by Jonah Echo

    as bad as you may have found it, there was writing there. And Indy and Marion aren't actually an item completely until towards the end. After the Mutt is your kid thing, there is still all that bickering on the truck, and the conversation about who they are with, the one that ends with "They weren't you". And then she smiles from ear to ear. I thought that all of that was fine. Besides, whether it was right or not, Marion and Indy have a history and they fell back on that. I'm talking trying to manufacture a difficult bridge between dislike and adoration with just a song and some scenes of daisy picking.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:36 a.m. CST

    Don't ever go to Thailand, Hobo

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    Because all their movies involve double takes. A guy doing something as simple as ordering a coffee is shown from 5 different angles.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:38 a.m. CST

    in addition to the map tap

    by Jonah Echo

    the fact that some films to this day stil use the dreaded map superimposed over travel images as a red line tracks the progress.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:42 a.m. CST

    the peeping character in horror films..

    by Jonah Echo

    In horror or suspense films, you always have that supposedly shocking shot of someone peering into a window, suspiciously or menacingly. It has worked in the past, but you need to go back to films like The Innocent to find it done well. I did like having the monster in Pumpkinhead skulking back and forth outside the window, but he wasn't peering. Worst case of this was probably Wendigo, where after the love scene, you see a two minute take of this flannel wearing hick just staring in, bemused at it. It is never referenced again, it's just there.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:43 a.m. CST

    its just such a non-human reaction....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    Nobody on the planet would behave like that. You don't see a chick for 20 years....suddenly she pops back up and this 20 year old kid leading you around turns out to be your son. No human being would think oh great...suddenly we're a unit and I can start lecturing on how important a college education is. People can say whatever they want about the fridge, the monkeys, whatever......the human relationships in Indy IV are by far the phoniest, most far-fetched element on screen. I think thats what apologists don't understand.....the basis of hatred toward the film isn't even so much the cartoony action....that cartoony shit would be okay if it had a solid human foundation.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:43 a.m. CST

    I'm with you Danny

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    Not to whizz in anyone's cornflakes, but I thought Indy 4 was one of the worst written movies ever and I'm not going to argue about it anymore, but I. JUST. CAN'T. UNDERSTAND. WHY. PEOPLE. CAN'T. SEE. THAT. The novelization might be a hint better but the screenplay as shot is abysmal.<p>And I love the map tap mention. No director is above using it.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:46 a.m. CST

    I motion banning Indy 4

    by Jonah Echo

    from mention. For one thing, I saw it once, and want to see it again before defending it against all comers. And I'd suggest a second viewing for those who think it's the worst movie. Obviously, you don't have to. Otherwise, I think we should just put it out of considered conv. No one here is going to budge, outside of actually re-watching the movie and seeing it differently.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:46 a.m. CST

    I have the Indy IV novelization....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    I started reading it awhile back but got side-tracked. I'm gonna start over....it has a really cool opening. And much much better little character moments. The scenes that are right out of the movie have slight variations in dialogue that make the conversations flow much nicer.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:47 a.m. CST

    Jonah Echo --- I agree.....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    And I have seen it 3 times. Once in theaters and twice at home on a very good quality pirate version.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:50 a.m. CST

    last comment on Indy IV....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    ...with every viewing the greaser/diner scene and motorcycle chase got better....and the rest of the film got worse. I wish the entire damn thing was in the little University town and involved greasers in some way.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:50 a.m. CST

    Best part Danny was when momma came back

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    All of a sudden you see the SUV flying by and Goldblum says to hang on to something.<p> Overall the movie wasn't as good as the first one, but it sure had its moments of fun.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:51 a.m. CST

    I won't be able to discuss it for many years then...

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    ...as I don't plan on watching it again until my daughter is old enough to see the movies and only then if she demands to see the fourth one.<p>I hereby proclaim I will not bring it up in a TB again.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:52 a.m. CST

    the sidekick's confession..

    by Jonah Echo

    In many romantic comedies, and some buddy action films, you will have a sidekick who is there mostly to be humorous and in some cases do the crazy things we might wish the main character did, but we would hate him for. As the secondary character, the sidekick can do all kinds of ridiculous crap we would poo-poo the hero for. Somewhere though, before the end, the sidekick will have a poignant moment(in rom-com when the girl seems to have left, or in action when the case is horrible, and likely to be unsolved)where he reveals something about himself/herself that lets us understand them, or helps the hero unravel his problems. My favorite mock of this was in Shallow Hal when Jason Alexander's shallow womanizer reveals that he actually has a vestigial tail.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:52 a.m. CST

    Chitty-- I totally don't hate Lost World like others do.....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    That whole trailer over the cliff scene was fucking amazing....

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:53 a.m. CST

    last mention here as well...the greaser scene

    by Jonah Echo

    was awesome and the only part where I truly felt the old Indy magic back. Everything else was fine, but not "THIS IS INDIANA FREAKIN' JONES". But that scene did the trick.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:55 a.m. CST

    I despised The Lost World

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    They really butchered the book and that ending in San Diego was just unnecessary.<p>But like all Spielberg movies that miss the mark, it has a scene or two for the time capsule and the T-Rex attack on the trailer was almost as good as the attack from the first one.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:55 a.m. CST

    Lost World was a series of great moments

    by Jonah Echo

    in search of a non-bloated, adventurous and scary film. The trailer scene=great. Hatari jeep ride with dinos=great. Jurassic-zilla in N.Y.=great. The tall grass=great. Everything else=meh.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:56 a.m. CST

    sorry..San Diego..

    by Jonah Echo

    my bad.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:56 a.m. CST

    Big time pet peeve!!

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    I am a car nut and can spot many types of cars by just their shapes.<p> Never fails that the car in the chase is visibly different from the car rolling end over end in the crash.<p> Sure most people may not notice, but I do.<p> Also when a slow motion shot of a car lands from a huge jump, you can see fenders and suspension damage, but the car drives on in the next take.<p> Why show the damage if you are going to show the car complete a split second later?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:58 a.m. CST

    you know whats funny about IMDB

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    How they have a random person's face from the premiere of the film as the main pic. Indy IV has a pic of Billy Zane smiling as he walks into the premiere. What the fuck? He probably came out of it saying it would have been better with The Phantom in it.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:58 a.m. CST

    Chitty..

    by Jonah Echo

    just watched Terminator 2 in bluray the other day, and noted that in the scene with the tractor trailer falling off the bridge. We see it take abuse that would have rendered it obsolete, but then it's driving towards Furlong as if it just hit a pothole.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11 a.m. CST

    I also hate small details missed

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    When Freeman and Pitt are driving in the rain at the first of the movie, you can see they are going straight, but the steering wheel is turned off center.<p> But the very next cut back from Pitt and Freeman has the steering wheel straight again.<p> I always notice those things and wonder why they can't in post-production.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:01 a.m. CST

    That should be Pitt and Freeman in Se7en

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:01 a.m. CST

    Spielberg could shoot a dinosaur.......

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    ....getting a colonoscopy and I'd still have a fun time with it. As long as Johnny Williams scored that shit.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:02 a.m. CST

    the freakin digital red bomb readout.

    by Jonah Echo

    Anytime something is about to explode, it seems there is a little readout on it to help with the suspense or something. It's funny because even discreet terrorist bombs seem to come equipped with a timer that counts down. I was surprised that the bomb they use to fall the wall of Helm's Deep in Two Towers didnt have a digital readout on it. <P> My fave crappy readout was in Mission to Mars when Connie Neilson actually looks at her oxygen readout and it starts flashing the words "POINT OF NO RETURN."

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:04 a.m. CST

    Noticed that too Jonah

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    I have T2 on my ipod and watch or listen while I'm at work.<p> Also notice when he walks up to the bar and is flashing the stats of the vehicles he is looking at.<p> It says Chrysler for the car and it is clearly a Ford LTD.<p> Little things like that bug me, as they are small details that would have cost nothing to simply get right in the first place.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:04 a.m. CST

    I wish my penis had a digital readout....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    ...so it could let me know when its ready to call it quits. I would love to look down and see a bright red POINT OF NO RETURN.....PULL OUT....PULL OUT....

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:06 a.m. CST

    Chitty -- Chrysler/ Ford

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    Something like that could have been a legal thing....where they shot the cars without permission because you can't clearly see an emblem.....yet they found that Ford wouldn't give the rights to use their name printed on the screen, so they had to say it was something else.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:06 a.m. CST

    Speilberg for MEG!

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    A Jurassic Shark! Please let it happen.<p> Imagine what he could do with that.<p> The book even has a dinosaur and shark encounter at the first.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:08 a.m. CST

    Chitty, that's a problem with every car movie

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    No car could take the abuse they do and keep on going. And of course every driver is a magician behind the wheel and can pull off miraculous turns and zip through traffic at ludicrous speed.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:08 a.m. CST

    And Anakin1268 is any better?

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    Did you also consider the handle Haydens_Fluffer?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:10 a.m. CST

    the workaholic dad and the sassy kids..

    by Jonah Echo

    In almost any genre, if you want to give a character a family life where he learns to grow, you make the father a workaholic who learns to spend time with his kids. In the interim the kids are so repugnant and sassy and smartmouthed to the parent that even Fred Rodgers would have sold their little sneering asses to the gypsies. But as soon as dad attends their little league game, they stop lighting the dog on fire and start helping old ladies cross the street. If you believed hollywood you would assume every middle aged guy who was good at his job neglected his family and every 10-17 year old was Don Rickles in training. <P> Worst offender recently: a movie I adored with this one exception-Dan in Real Life. He should have eloped with Juliette Binoche and left those daughters behind. Seriously, what child actually says "We so prefer her to YOU."

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:11 a.m. CST

    Anakin1268

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    You bet your sweet bippy he's for real. And he's a celebrity. So show him some respect.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:12 a.m. CST

    Anakin1268 -- its true....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    I can send you pics that TMZ snapped of me getting in a car with no panties on...

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:14 a.m. CST

    Danny, that was you?

    by Jonah Echo

    I thought it was Lindsey out on the town with her pet boa draped over her lap?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:14 a.m. CST

    You're really running with this topic, Jonah

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    And everything you've brought up is spot on. I too am sick of the neglectful father stereotype.<p>And what's with all the fat schlubs who have smokin' hot wives? When does this ever happen?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:15 a.m. CST

    Danny, I have the old version of that penis readout

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    It is the pointing of the toes and the tingling of the thighs. Sort like setting your phone on vibrate.<p> That's when I know to give "The Tap", which is the signal for dismount for whatever girl I was with.<p> But you are right, as the pointing of the toes and tingling is more a guideline and not an exact point of reference for potential impregnation.<p> Digital readout would be more precise and give very valuable added seconds of orgasmic pleasure.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:15 a.m. CST

    Anakin1268

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    Do you tongue your mother with that mouth?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:19 a.m. CST

    Anakin1268 = Egg Salad = Mr. Cock Tease

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:22 a.m. CST

    Typing to save the day...

    by Jonah Echo

    Obviously, since the internet this has become a bigger part of films, but how about those pics where the tension is on, and in order to resolve it we need a BIG scene of ....wait for it...people typing furiously, and whispering "c'mon, c'mon". My fave is when the other characters huddle around this character to watch them do it, when they could be doing other helpful things. It was annoying in Jurassic Park but at least Neil and Dern were bracing the door.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:23 a.m. CST

    Anakin1268 -- hold your dick?

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    That's a strange request. Not do anything to it but hold it? You don't even want an H.J.? Maybe you are a pedophile priest...they seem to think its okay to have children merely touch them and do nothing further.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:24 a.m. CST

    Hold your dick?

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    Sure thing. Let me just go grab a set of tweezers.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:25 a.m. CST

    Jurassi Park

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    Was one of the first times I remember that Jonah.....typing away frantically trying to open a door or something.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:26 a.m. CST

    the horror contrivance of killing off potentially

    by Jonah Echo

    great badass characters to show how strong the villain is, before having him fall at the hands of a teen girl or something. <P> Predator did this well back in the 80s, by presenting some new tough as nails guy every few minutes and then having the Predator cut through him like hot butter. I liked that, but since then we always get this tough character introduced, and we all root for him, but he gets taken out five minutes or so after being introduced. <P> Good brief use of interesting side character in horror/advenure: the old fighter pilot in Mummy. He has maybe ten minutes of screentime, but he is utilized well, and his final moments actually fulfill his back story. Nicely done there.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:29 a.m. CST

    Sorta to go alone with this topic....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    ..What film had a great build-up for a character with potential of tons of ass kicking, yet the fight was over far too quick or the character died right away? Some sort of build-up to a character followed by a huge let down......

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:30 a.m. CST

    Loved that pilot in the Mummy

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    Also wondered why Tim didn't just walk over and hand them the gun to shoot the raptor.<p> Also when T-Rex blows breath at Neil and Lex when they are by the overturned Explorer. It blows from below to knock his hat off and the T-Rex is above them looking down.<p> I always hate that part.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:31 a.m. CST

    You didn't see computers in movies much before JP

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    And even then, with the exception of films like Wargames, they didn't figure prominently.<p>I remember seeing the kid at the computer in Big playing the ice cavern game thinking it was the coolest thing ever.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:32 a.m. CST

    in horror/sci-fi films...I absolutely

    by Jonah Echo

    hate the scene where one dude panics, heads off from the group, and is instantly killed or eaten a few minutes later. I dislike it because it's such a cliche. I can understand it happening, but some movies have dispatched fine characters that way. And it's supposed to give the killer some fodder and make us feel anxious, but it's not because the moment the person cuts and runs you know they are ruined. <P> I did, however, enjoy a scene in the previously mentioned Lost World where that Robert Bakker clone was hiding in the waterfall from the t rex, saw the coral snake on his shirt and freaked out, getting eaten.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:33 a.m. CST

    Anakin1268 -- dude you're boring

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:34 a.m. CST

    Jonah Echo -- that scene is kick ass

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    That huge beast's head trashing around and roaring right in your face, but it cant get to you......just magical. That guy that got eaten with the long hair and plaid shirt is a real paleontologist.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:34 a.m. CST

    Just chillax about Indy 4.

    by HoboCode

    It's not that we (people who enjoyed it) don't realize the writing sucked, it's that WE. DON'T. GIVE. A. SHIT.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:35 a.m. CST

    remember our don't feed the trolls policy..

    by Jonah Echo

    and this one seems too blaise for Eggsalad. He was almost entertaining his nuttiness, that and his alter ego, ILAGCT... MMMMMMMMHHMMMMMMM....

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:35 a.m. CST

    LibWar.

    by HoboCode

    50 feet is not that much.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:35 a.m. CST

    Danny, I think we're all in agreement about Darth Maul

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    As great as that end fight was, he should have made it to the third film.<p>Jeremy Irons didn't get a proper send off in DH3.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:36 a.m. CST

    Danny...I know...

    by Jonah Echo

    but I only thought he was supposed to be Robert Bakker, didnt know he actually was. As a kid I was so into dinos, I read three of his books despite them being terribly boring. Over to IMDB to find out.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:37 a.m. CST

    peeve 2

    by HoboCode

    Car chases where a Ford Escort or some shit sounds and handles like a Ferrari.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:39 a.m. CST

    Anakin1268

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    I thought you wanted to come and here and really start shit and argue, which is always fun. But this random sexual "CUM LORD" humor is dull man....real dull. I like good old perverse jokes....but you're just too run and gun. It makes you look like some weirdo with no life. You don't wanna tell a joke or conversate, you just type random shit and sit around waiting for a colorful response. I image you to have a pretty severe wheezing problem-- is this correct?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:40 a.m. CST

    Swordsman in Raiders

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    He steps out of the crowd swings his sword around and BLAM! Indy shoots him.<p> Love that scene and the background info Speilberg and Ford discussed about it.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:40 a.m. CST

    Danny...it's not the real paleontologist

    by Jonah Echo

    IMDB lists Thomas F. Duffy as Dr. Robert Burke, and the real paleontologist is Robert Bakker.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:41 a.m. CST

    Darth Maul

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    I think he should have switched spots with Dooku....

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:41 a.m. CST

    Jonah Echo -- WHAT?!!! FUCK THAT!!

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    All these years I've been suckered!!

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:43 a.m. CST

    I agree Hobo

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    Sort of like when a Ford Crown Vic keeps pace with a Corvette or Ferrari in a police chase.<p> Knowing the Crown Vic would not be able to keep up in terms of speed or handling around corners.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:45 a.m. CST

    Jonah, you just ruined it for Danny

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    Do you go to pre-schools and tell them there's no Santa Claus too? Cold, man, cold.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:47 a.m. CST

    family members held hostage.

    by Jonah Echo

    I think Hawaiian mentioned this in regards to a particular film a few TBs ago, but when a hero/cop/warrior has a known and obvious villain who is more than capable of learning of/getting at his family and said hero makes no attempt to safeguard his family, or even warn them. I also despise the device that has the psycho leaving voice mail messages for the character. That might have been effective once, but now it's just laughable. And if I remember correctly the Highlander series did it TWICE! <P> Also, when the hero comes after villain he just suddenly has a family member in his hands, with no previous explanation, like he pulled them out of his pants or something.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:48 a.m. CST

    Hey, Danny killed the bigfoot dream

    by Jonah Echo

    for me yesterday, so I'm just returning the favor.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:51 a.m. CST

    Don't forget the magical windshield that manages...

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    ...to self-repair after getting shot repeatedly.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:53 a.m. CST

    Was the bigfoot debunked then?

    by HoboCode

    Please tell me it was just a ruse to fuck with Faux News

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:53 a.m. CST

    Or the windshield that allows drivers to fly through

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    This was on Abominable the other day.<p> Girl crashes into tree and is thrown forward through the windshield and lands in front of the car!<p> Trust me, you don't just fly through safety glass like that.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:54 a.m. CST

    yeah....sadly the only Sasquatch that exists is....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    ..Anakin1268's sister/girlfriend. That bitch pussy stank like road-kill man......nasty ass....

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:55 a.m. CST

    Or cars that lose 100 hubcaps

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    I counted seven hubcaps fly from a car's rims in a chase on T.J. Hooker.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:56 a.m. CST

    peeve 3

    by HoboCode

    the kevlar/mithril vest reveal. when someone is shot and people think they are dead and the guy wakes up and the camera slowly pans down to the victim opening up his shirt Superman-style to reveal the vest.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:57 a.m. CST

    HoboCode -- yeah that is lame......the vest reveal

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:58 a.m. CST

    it was only cool in Back To The Future III

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 11:59 a.m. CST

    Best Superman-style reveal

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    Was when Sloth on the Goonies pulled back his shirt and had the Supes t-shirt on.<p> Classic.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, noon CST

    The vest reveal peaked with Doc Brown

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    Since then it's been all downhill.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 12:01 p.m. CST

    no one has any disappointing build ups?

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 12:02 p.m. CST

    I don't know about that HOD

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    When Harry revealed his vest to Lloyd after being shot in Dumb and Dumber we cheered.<p> Of course we were all drunk and having a very good time.<p> That movie goes good with beer snuck into a theater.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 12:03 p.m. CST

    There is one I've been trying to remember lately...

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    It is sort of a kids movie I think, and it it some sort of bad ass that is protecting the kids. And I remember there is an awesome build up and I was all pumped to see the guy kick some ass but then he gets left behind and attacked by a big mob or something like that......fuck can't remember. It made me sorta sad for him I think.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 12:03 p.m. CST

    Also when Lloyd asked

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    "What if they had shot you in the face?"<p> FBI lady said it was a chance they were willing to take.<p> Ha!

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 12:05 p.m. CST

    or an even better topic: Movies You Got Some Action To....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    ...in the theater. Anyone remember any good experiences and the films that accompany them? Jonah...I know you have like 17. Don't brag. Bastard.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 12:16 p.m. CST

    Sadly, I've never dated a chick that would get...

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    ...freaky in a movie theater. Come to think of it, in my youth I always got hosed. My friends would tell me about freaky this and fellatio that and when it came to me I was always like, "Does missionary with candles and Peter Cetera playing in the background count?"

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 12:17 p.m. CST

    The 'showdown' in Mummy 3

    by toadkillerdog

    Big let down. Jet Li and Michelle Yeoh. The showdown in Forbidden Kingdom between Jet Li and Jacki Chan. It was very busy, but it had no sense of danger to it.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 12:19 p.m. CST

    I made out during Schindler's List.

    by HoboCode

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 12:20 p.m. CST

    Jonah, I'm having a hard time thinking of a payoff...

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    ...that never came. I can think of villains who didn't go out in the blaze of glory I was hoping for though.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 12:22 p.m. CST

    HoboCode -- you sick bastard

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 12:23 p.m. CST

    damn....that movie is in the back of my mind...

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    I've been trying to remember it for weeks. But I have no memory of any details other than that moment I thought holy shit....this guy is gonna kick some ass and defend these kids. He shows up and gets his ass kicked but acts as a diversion I guess....

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 12:24 p.m. CST

    Hobo

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    Then surely you made out during Rochelle, Rochelle and Sack Lunch as well. Prognosis Negative and Checkmate probably held your interest though.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 12:25 p.m. CST

    I got an H.J. during Stigmata.....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    ....talk about freaky.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 12:36 p.m. CST

    Scorpion King 2 will be the most important film of 2008

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    It will trump anything the Coen Brothers have ever attempted.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 12:39 p.m. CST

    Jonah

    by Series7

    Saw you mentioned the Wizzard of Gore thing, I am trying to get that first thing on my DVD. I really like Crispin Glover, really wish I could see What Is It, but looks like he'll never put it out on the DVDs.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 12:47 p.m. CST

    Danny..not me..but I do have story..

    by Jonah Echo

    used to work at a Regal theater in high school. During a screening of, I think, The Long Kiss Goodnight,one of our ushers dicovered a guy having straight-up noisy sex with his girlfriend in a half-packed theater. We walked in, and the girl was up, riding the guy and he was underneath. When the head manager walks up, the guy literally rolls the girl off onto an adjacent seat, and stands to face to the manager. He is this tall hillbilly, complete with long hair and creepy stare. His wang is still hanging out and he basically, I swear, hits the manager. And because we were all fans of the manager in question, about six ushers bodily removed him from the theater.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 12:49 p.m. CST

    Oh wait, I do have one...

    by Jonah Echo

    I got screwed during Emerich's Godzilla but that was more psychological than physical, and since I paid eight dollars for it, Iguess it was consensual between me and good ol Roland.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 12:53 p.m. CST

    Jonah Echo

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    Craziest story ever!! What fucking city was this? What kinda chick will get down like that? I understand a dude....cause dudes are nasty bastards....but damn. What kinda girl is that?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 12:55 p.m. CST

    and I am so glad that hillbilly got down like that....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    ...in a Shane Black film.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:02 p.m. CST

    Danny..

    by Jonah Echo

    This was not in the city. It wasn't even in Baltimore county, but in a neighboring Maryland county. And the girl looked about three years the dude's junior and looked very crazy. I suspect drugs were involved, which is why the dude and the girl skedaddled immediately.By the time we had delivered him through the exit, she was out the door and then they were both gone.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:03 p.m. CST

    Funny theater story.... (not sexual, sorry)

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    When we saw The Dark Knight there was this huge fat guy sitting right in front of us....about 10 minutes into the film we hear this loud liquid splash like someone just dumped their whole drink on the floor. But then I see the fat guy hunched forward and realize he just hurled.....his friend next to him is patting him on the back lovingly. And the guy stands up with puke all over his mouth and chin and starts stumbling down the aisle. This guy is like 6'2 350 lbs....no joke. So he's stumbling around in the dark and I realize he's drunk off his ass. He walked in pretty normal, but now its quite apparent. He finally makes his way through the aisle and onto the stairs of the theater and the whole place is staring at him thinking how the fuck is this guy gonna make it down the stairs. Well....he didn't...he took two steps and then just falls face first on the stairs and sorta slides down the rest of the way kinda like The Penguin when he dies in Batman Returns. The guy lays there for like 10 seconds and nobody does a thing not even his friend who is sitting enjoying the film. Finally the fat guy stands back up and instead of going out the exit on his side he has to stumble across the front of the theater toward the exit on the opposite side....mumbling to himself and holding his arms out in front of him like he's blind. He finally makes it out and we forget about him until we leave.....where we see his friend find him laying on his back in some bushes having a smoke. Fuck man....I want whatever he's drinking......

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:05 p.m. CST

    new animation!

    by ironic_name

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:08 p.m. CST

    sorta slides down the rest of the way kinda like The Penguin whe

    by Jonah Echo

    Danny, I have tears in my eyes..great story...you know, let's do crazy theater stories again, becuase I have a ton and I wasn't on during the time the topic was up, and when I returned we had long since moved on.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:10 p.m. CST

    CRAZY THEATER STORIES!!

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    Involving sex, drugs, rock and roll, gangsters, robberies, weapons, fights, arguments, and/or drugs......GO!!

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:11 p.m. CST

    A group of us went to see the first Narnia

    by Jonah Echo

    film on opening weekend, on a Sunday night and the theater was packed. Smelled something that had to be poop. One of our friends is chastising her husband for passing gass,when my wife points out the source of it, sitting three seats down from us. There is a woman with her baby in her lap, and this baby has a diaper that looks like the inside of a loaded cement mixer. The woman is changing the baby's diaper, and cleaning him off in her lap, and in the meantime she balls up the double-stuffed diaper and balances it on the chair arm of the seat NEXT to her.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:12 p.m. CST

    There was a girl in junior high..

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    That would give hand jobs in the theater.<p> Wasn't long until we started screwing her in the hallway that led to the alley beside the theater.<p> You didn't even have to take her as a date. She would be there with a friend and all you had to do was talk to her and flirt.<p> I nailed her during The Golden Child and when I told my friends about it Sunday afternoon, one them had screwed her too during the same movie on the same night.<p> Her dad also showed up at a party one night a year or two later at the Fairgrounds and knocked a guy out with one shot!<p> She was awesome and her dad was like the guy Indy fought under the plane in Raiders.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:12 p.m. CST

    Jonah

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    There were tears in my eyes.....luckily it was my 2nd viewing of TDK. So I was just watching the guy's every move. There were a few times when he was trying to get through the aisle and he looked like he was going to land right on someone's lap.....people kinda leaned back uncomfortable and held their hands up as he passed.......he looks like Earl's brother Ethan Suplee in My Name Is Earl....but when he used to be way fatter like in Mallrats.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:13 p.m. CST

    When

    by Series7

    Me and my girl, who i'm always trying to get her to get freaky with me in a theater since I take her to tons of movies where we are like the only ones, saw that Host. We noticed like a teenage couple come in about half way into the movie. We were like 2 of 10 in the theater and we were sitting the furthest up, and this couple went to the back row. We knew right away that they came to full around. We looked up at them and saw them making out and then like 20 minutes later we looked up and they were gone, they were fooling around on the floor. We were both like ewwwww theater floors are so nasty! And when the movie was over we saw them leave and they couldn't have been more then 15 and the girl was a bigger black girl and it was a small skinny ass white dude. Not to be raciest but this was in Oklahoma and we figured that there parents wouldn't let them see each other.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:13 p.m. CST

    ChittyChittyGangBang -- do you still have her number?

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:14 p.m. CST

    Oh and her dad's name was Norman

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    So we called him Stormin' Norman from then on.<p> She also went to my church.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:15 p.m. CST

    Series7 -- thats sad.....good for them...fighting oppression!!

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:16 p.m. CST

    but did she look good or what?

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:17 p.m. CST

    During the Regal years..

    by Jonah Echo

    had several instances involving children. We had a guy soaked come and complain to us that someone's child had pissed on him, but we never actually got to the bottom of that story.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:19 p.m. CST

    Sadly, two kids overdosed in their car..

    by Jonah Echo

    outside the theater. One of them, unfortunately, died.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:19 p.m. CST

    My buddies

    by Series7

    Went to a special screening of Dogville in New York. Though the best way to describe one of these buddies is to say that he is the real life version of Harvey Keitel's Lieutenant. So needless to say that the both got drunk, but they didn't one to leave the theater so my friend threw up in his jacket sleeve and feel asleep. Forgot about it and when he left the theater he put his jacket on. And since he was getting a ride with some people he didn't know that well, and were senior to him at the military academy we all attended. He didn't take it off the whole 2 hour car ride back. Then again this is the same friend that threw up in his boot the night before we went underway and in his hangover stupor wore it all day the next day.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:20 p.m. CST

    during Gangs of New York..

    by Jonah Echo

    a fist fight broke out briefly. I remember being so tired that I didn't notice it immediately as it was happening in the seats below us.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:22 p.m. CST

    Yep, she had a great body

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    Her face wasn't the best in the world, but personally if they had a kick-ass body, then I didn't care what their face looked like.<p> Another guy moved to our town a few years later and admitted he was a virgin to us.<p> So we quickly set him up with her as good friends would do.<p> We came and picked him up later that night as he snuck out of her house.<p> He said they were both naked on the bed and she grabbed his buttocks and slammed him in.<p> He had a tear in his eye and we asked what happened.<p> He said he wanted his first time to be special and she ruined it for him by being all aggressive!<p> Holy Shit we laughed for WEEKS about that!<p> I'm just glad Stormin' Norman didn't catch him, as he would have had more than just tears coming from his eyes.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:23 p.m. CST

    HOD

    by HoboCode

    Glad somebody got the Seinfeld reference. ;-)

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:24 p.m. CST

    And don't forget about Death Blow.

    by HoboCode

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:25 p.m. CST

    I was at Wal Mart

    by Series7

    The other day and I went to grab a cart and I noticed a balled up diaper in it. And I was just like, when the fuck am I going to make enough money so I don't have to shop at wal mart anymore? I mean for fucks sakes they have child changing stations in their bathrooms? How fucking nasty do you have to be? Like I've done some nasty things, and peed on things I shouldn't have. BUT I DON'T HAVE A FUCKING CHILD I AM RESPONSIBLE FOR. Seriously is it that hard to handle your kids? People that bring kids to movies pretend like they can't get a baby sitter, well those sort of people are people that don't really care about movies and should fucking wait till you get a baby sitter. My parents never brought me as a baby to movies.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:28 p.m. CST

    I was in the Wal-Mart parking lot and...

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    This Native American kid was running along in his daiper.<p> He and I guess his brothers and sisters were playing in the little grass median in the parking lot.<p> All of a sudden he drops his daiper and takes a dump crouched down like a dog, finishes and pulls his daiper up and keeps running and playing.<p> This was when I was a kid and I still remember it crystal clear.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:30 p.m. CST

    A while back I mentioned

    by Jonah Echo

    a theater where a guy was shot during X3. I brought it up again yesterday. The theater isnt where I live, but about 45 minutes away, but whenever we visit certain friends we stop by, mostly because it's one of the few nearby theaters that showed indie and arthouse stuff. Now I go almost exclusively to the Charles in the city, but before the gunshot story we would go sometimes. And it was CRAZY. <P> My wife and I and a friend saw Deep Blue. We were almost the only people in the theater save for a group ofpeople that just kept wandering in and leaving, and not the same group, but a whole host of random visitors. One elderly lady wandered in halfway through, fell asleep, and then woke up when the scene playing was a school of shrimp. The lady looks up and yells at the screen "SCRIMPS! WHY ARE THERE SCRIMPS ON THE SCREEN!" and clearly enraged, storms out of the theater. She was one of about five people that just dropped in during the course of the movie. I think she was the Ghost of Christmas Past.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:31 p.m. CST

    DGDB

    by HoboCode

    Serouslt that was a hilarious story, and the Penguin line was GOLD. But didn't the entire theater reek of puke? I would have thouhgt it would have set off a Stand By Me/Goonies chain reaction?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:33 p.m. CST

    I remember

    by Series7

    After seeing a movie me and my brother were waiting for our parents to pick us up and all of the sudden rocks started flying at us. We saw this fat kid throwing rocks us from the drainage ditch on the other side of the road, we were standing in front of the poster section outside of the theater. And so we started throwing back, we got pissed because we ran out of rocks and so we ran over there and he got scared and ran into the drainage ditch. When we got over there he was clearly stuck because its a drainage pipe and he was fat, but our ride was there so we left.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:33 p.m. CST

    I got drunk as fuck at Arclight in Hollywood once...

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    And kept sneaking drinks inside the theater from the bar. You're not suppose to bring them in but I kept running to the bar to refill my whiskey/coke throughout the film. Anyway by the end of the film....I believe Bourne Supremacy.....I stood up (barely) still holding my empty glass. I totally forgot it was a glass glass and just released it from my hand as if it were a standard soda cup and it just shatters all over the place. For whatever reason it was insanely loud. The theater was like half full and I swear to Christ almost everyone took off running...like sprinting toward the exit after they heard the glass break. Maybe the sound of breaking glass in a theater is so foreign it just terrified people. Weird reaction I thought....

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:34 p.m. CST

    Had a child lick and stick a gummy bear to the

    by Jonah Echo

    back of the person's head in front of her. She and her family were at Anaconda, and I remember seeing her do it. The man in question was very gracious, but as an usher, me not so much.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:36 p.m. CST

    HoboCode

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    Man...you know how dead serious people were about TDK. Nothing could ruin it for them....I could smell the scent of puke linger but it didn't smell that bad surprisingly. It smelled kind of like burnt toast.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:39 p.m. CST

    In American Werewolf in Paris

    by Jonah Echo

    there was an obviously homeless dude sitting fourth row in just cackling to himself, loudly, and then he took off his pants and started crying.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:41 p.m. CST

    You guys have som f-ed up stories

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    I live in a bubble I guess cause I've got nothing.<p>Well, almost nothing.<p>A friend and I got ten sheets to the wind one night and decided to see a movie. So we picked up a bottle of Goldschlager and went to see The Phantom Menace the week before it left the theater. We finished the bottle before the pod race scene and then spent the rest of the movie roaming around the theater throwing up in just about every aisle. Thankfully, the theater was empty.<p>Never so drunk in my life. I don't even remember leaving. Just waking up the next morning in the middle of my living room floor.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:41 p.m. CST

    Gummy Bear to the head!

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    That fucking sucks....but with shit like that, what do you do? Punch the kid?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:42 p.m. CST

    Jonah -- homeless story...

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    ...awwww...thats a sad story too. Poor guy.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:43 p.m. CST

    I remember watching Fallen

    by Jonah Echo

    when it came out in an almost empty theater, and there was one guy towards the back, who sat there very still after the credits were rolling, and he was almost unnaturaly still, to the point where he seemed like a dummy. As I was walking out, I kid you not, he starts humming "Time is On My Side" and reaches out and grabs my arm. If you saw the movie, you will appreciate the joke he was pulling. It definitely unsettled me.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:44 p.m. CST

    Theater story.

    by HoboCode

    Thisn't isn't great but I went to a private screening of Rocky Balboa sponsored by NIAF (Nat. Ital. Amer. Assn.) and attended by Stallone. Anyway they provided wine and champagne that you could take into the theater with you, but they used real glasses. My friend and I counted I believe 11 different people drop their glasses to loud explosive crashes during the film. After awhile it became a game to see how many more morons would drop their drinks. It was a lot more entertaining than the actual film that's for sure.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:45 p.m. CST

    Went to see Dreamgirls at the heinous theater

    by Jonah Echo

    And by the midpoint, almost everyone was up in the aisles, dancing and singing LOUDLY and not one single usher came in to calm it down. They treated it like it was Rocky Horror or something.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:46 p.m. CST

    HoboCode -- no love for Rocky Balboa?

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    You are no American......that movie bleeds red, white, and blue....

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:47 p.m. CST

    LOL - Damn!

    by toadkillerdog

    Between these stories and what LibWar is doing to some dude stupid enough to try and take him on over on Carol TB, I am crying! Funny shit. Series, you cracked me up with that 'peeing on things I shouldnt have' that was too funny. I wish I had some movie stories to contribute, but at least you know someone is enjoying them!

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:48 p.m. CST

    Who caters a movie screening with wine glasses?

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    What a maroon.<p>It seems this group has a limitless supply of topics.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:49 p.m. CST

    Theater story 2.

    by HoboCode

    This was a while ago before stadium seating and I remember someone dropped a beer bottle from the back row that didn't break but proceeded to loudly roll and bang around the chair supports all the way down to the front where it smashed agaisnt the wall during the quietest moment of the movie.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:51 p.m. CST

    House Party

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    I still laugh about that story somebody told way back in that Fancy Theater TB about seeing House Party in some ghetto theater outside of L.A. The guy said he was a skinny white dude on a date with a skinny white chick and they just pulled into some random theater and went in to find this giant gangsta party going down. He said before the movie the whole place was up and dancing, some dude was blasting music on a boom box, some guy had a cooler full of beer he was selling. The guy said he has never had more fun.....hilarious visual.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:52 p.m. CST

    About five years ago

    by Jonah Echo

    myself, a friend and his sister went to see The Order(bad mistake, though to our credit it had been at one point a good screenplay). The movie was supremely boring, but the theater was filled with various random sounds. First there was a baby crying, and I never could spot the actual baby, and then the sounds of a person snoring, and finally a cricket. This freakin' cricket was louder than everything else. So bad, that finally a lady complains and then we watch the epic battle of theater usher and cricket begin. These poor guys search the whole theater with a flashlight, during the friggin movie, and cannot find the cricket. Finally it stops chirping, and with clear relief they leave. As soon as they are gone, it starts chirping again.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:52 p.m. CST

    Rocky Balboa

    by HoboCode

    I fucking hated it, but I know I'm in the minority. I'm actually the same guy who got called out by Stallone when he was answering TBer questions. You may know me better as "PwnedByStallone."

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:53 p.m. CST

    I had a friend in High School who was a real bad ass...

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    He lit up a cigarette during The Jackal, that same time I talked about before where we were drunk off our ass and laughing uncontrollably everytime it cut to a close up of Bruce Willis with one of those horrible whigs. Anyway....I was always amazed, it was a semi-full theater in a very nice suburban area and he just lights up a smoke in 1997 and smokes the entire thing without anyone saying a word.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:54 p.m. CST

    The cricket.

    by HoboCode

    LOL! That would suck.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:56 p.m. CST

    someone complained about a cricket?!!

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    Hahahaha......and I love The Order by the way. It is a very bizarre, fucked up film that is acted beautifully.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 1:57 p.m. CST

    theater puking..

    by Jonah Echo

    Bought sneak peek tickets to Zathura on Halloween weekend. It was late afternoon, and movie was stalled from starting on time. It gave the children there time to get JAZZED on candy and they were zooming about the thater like little robots. One of the large chubby kids next to me starts to sort of make this "GALLLURRRKKK"ing sound and before my eyes, chokes up a whole marshmallow into his hands, and he is so clearly relieved not to be choking, he looks up at me and smiles and then proceeds to shake his hand so the melty marshmallow flings onto the floor.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 2:06 p.m. CST

    Went to see Event Horizon at a cheap theater

    by Jonah Echo

    It was the last showing of the night, I had gone with my dad. I get outside and I don't have my wallet. So I go back in, and ask the kid cleaning up if I can get back into the Event Horizon theater as I think I left my wallet there. He looks strangely nervous but says yes, seems to laugh and then I go on in. Sitting in the empty theater spread across two theater seats is the largest usher I have ever seen and he has two girls draped over him, like Jabba the Hutt or something. I spot my wallet, sadly, in the same row, on the other side of he and his love nest. Wow, that was uncomfortable.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 2:07 p.m. CST

    Ha! Speaking of crickets and such

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    We used to go to the bait shop before school and get a shitload of crickets and turn them loose in class.<p> All the girls would start screaming and jumping around.<p> So yes, we naturally took them to the theater and I guess it was the darkness that made them sing.<p> So you could see people in front of us and around start picking up their legs and looking around.<p> But nobody left and nobody complained even when they were singing.<p> Stand By Me was the movie, so maybe the audience thought it was coming from the movie or something.<p> We also did the same thing with birds, as we had a live trap and could catch small sparrows or Robins and sneak them in with a brown paper sack.<p> That would get people moving, as the bird would fly around finally heading up into the space above the theater.<p> It was even funnier when we sent them down the hall at school, as you could hear the screams following the bird down the hall. Damn I wish I was a kid again.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 2:08 p.m. CST

    Jonah

    by toadkillerdog

    I could not help but think that the 'gallurking' sound and the movie Zathura reminded me of Thus spake Zarathustra

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 2:15 p.m. CST

    only theater prank we ever pulled..

    by Jonah Echo

    as a kid I was on my way with a friend to see Wayne's World. His parents dropped us off, and we had grabbed some stuff we randomly found in the car-the clear front of a cassette tap, two big D batteries, and an old Watchamacallit candy bar. <P> The bar was melted, and I put the batteries ontop of the clear cassette and covered them in the brown chocolate. When it hardened, it looked like nothing so much as a large turd. And the cassette top allowed us to easily slip it off and on the armrest of the theater seats.. We watched person after person stare at it, back away from it,etc. until finally one guy sits down almost on top of it, and starts looking at it, and then playing with it, eventually discovering the ruse.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 2:15 p.m. CST

    To obscure a reference?

    by toadkillerdog

    Did not mean to kill the TB

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 2:17 p.m. CST

    I got my two cents in over in the Carol TB, Toad

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    That's some funny stuff over there. Between that and GALLURKING over here, I'm done doing any work for the day. Not like I ever really started though.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 2:18 p.m. CST

    Perhaps my new SN should be

    by Jonah Echo

    Jonah the Gallurker.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 2:19 p.m. CST

    HOD

    by toadkillerdog

    I saw that. I commented over there, but it is worth repeating here: You are a kind and generous soul.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 2:24 p.m. CST

    went to see Two Towers

    by Jonah Echo

    at the Senator. We were in college and the group was something like 21 people. I had all the tickets, so I was actually stopped in front of the theater because they thought I was scalping. Anyway, friend of mine brings his new girlfriend, and she apparently has a shockingly viscious case of diahrreah right there. He is so psyched to see this thing, that it is only after her fifth trip to the bathroom that he acqueisces to take her home, and he made her pay for the next theater trip to see it.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 2:28 p.m. CST

    I just don't get these jerkoffs who thump thier chest...

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    ...say "Let's fight them over there so we don't have to fight them over here" and claim to bleed red, white and blue but refuse to serve because it means not finger f-ing poopsie whoopsie at the Silver Spoon Socialite Club while waiting to get their hands on their trust fund.<p>You don't have to serve to be patriotic. A lot of vets down at the VA could use some company and an open ear. Vets are the greatest Americans you'll ever have the pleasure of meeting.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 2:32 p.m. CST

    Your days of FINGER BANGING...

    by HoboCode

    ole Mary Jane Rotten Crotch...ARE OVER!!

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 2:37 p.m. CST

    re: Zathura marshmallow puking.....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    Jonah, I refuse to believe there was anyone else in the theater when you saw Zathura.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 2:38 p.m. CST

    Danny..not a fan of Zathura?

    by Jonah Echo

    or just realize that it didn't do well. Actually, that was the weekend before it's big release and there was a good sized crowd for like 5 p.m. on a saturday. And this was a screening people actuall paid for. I took that as a good sign, but it promptly bombed the following weekend.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 2:40 p.m. CST

    Hawaiian Organ Donor

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    What TB are you getting down on HOD?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 2:40 p.m. CST

    I watched Zathura on TBS

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    I didn't mind it.<p> It was no classic mind you, but it entertained.<p> Like the idea of a house floating in space.<p> You could drink beer on the front porch and whizz into space and watch it float away.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 2:41 p.m. CST

    Jonah...just kidding...

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    I've never seen it. I remember there was nobody in line for that thing when it opened. Something else opened that same weekend I was all into and I peeked in the theater and felt bad it was so empty. I can't stand that cunt Dax Shepard though...fuck that guy.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 2:42 p.m. CST

    Thank you, Hobo!

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    I couldn't remember the line or what movie it was from but that's what I was trying to say.<p>R. Lee Ermey is a god.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 2:44 p.m. CST

    Danny, TKD brought the O'Reilly TB to my attention

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    I posted yesterday but figured it was on it's way out, but a new flame war has begun between LibWar and the two biggest chickenhawk arseholes on these TBs.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 2:53 p.m. CST

    NODE - YOU'RE PWNEDBYSTALLONE?

    by BringingSexyBack

    Dude can I have your autograph?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 2:53 p.m. CST

    Zathura Sucked

    by Series7

    Elf sucked, Ironman was alright just because of RDJ. I don't understand the John Faveru love? Yeah he's a likable enough guy. But he isn't that great of a director. I've seriously thought about seeing Handcock just because it was directed by Peter Berg, too bad the trailers showed me everything I needed to know.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 2:55 p.m. CST

    Theater story 3.

    by HoboCode

    I went to see Higher Learning in college. Damn near had a race riot during that motherfucker. Fucking football team were all sitting in the front row drinking malt liqour and smashing bottles and shit.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 2:57 p.m. CST

    Yea,

    by Jonah Echo

    I liked Elf alright. Really liked Zathura(but, as an illustrator, I'm a Chris Van Allsburg fan)and loved Iron Man. On the other hand, don't get the Peter Berg love, though I thought Rundown was fun and Kingdom was mostly good.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 3:01 p.m. CST

    BRAFFED RETURNS!

    by BringingSexyBack

    It's been too long.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 3:03 p.m. CST

    Jonah

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    You do illustrations for board games?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 3:04 p.m. CST

    Hey Egg, see you are still galuurking about.

    by Jonah Echo

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 3:04 p.m. CST

    Fred is dating your mother Egg Salad?

    by HoboCode

    I had no idea.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 3:06 p.m. CST

    Danny..no not for board games..

    by Jonah Echo

    although I am doing the designs for the ones Im working on, but used to do book cover illustrations, particularly children's books. Haven't in a while, though have one I'm working on that is underway. A children's picture book.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 3:07 p.m. CST

    Sir Egg Salad

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    You should get in on that Bill O'Reilly TB. What is your stance on the wars in Iraq/Afghanistan?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 3:07 p.m. CST

    I think Egg Salad is ShitforBranes.

    by HoboCode

    He finally snapped after getting shelacked by Moriarty. To know the man is to smell the man after all, and I think Egg Salad has been sitting in the sun too long. Smells like his fat trekkie cunt mother's cooch.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 3:08 p.m. CST

    That sad part about Sir Eggy..

    by Jonah Echo

    is he isn't even the REAL eggsalad. He is someone else who just copied Eggy's shtick. He swears he is Eggy, but doesn't quite posess the bug-nuttiness that Egg does. For example there aren't 400 identical posts proclaiming something faux-offensive.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 3:08 p.m. CST

    Jonah Echo -- thats cool......

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    Do you work for a specific publisher or is it a job by job thing?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 3:09 p.m. CST

    Egg Salad is no Branebot....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    That guy was much scarier. Egg is just a dick.....Brane was fucking crazy. <p> "To know the man is to smell the man's flop sweat." hahahahaha.....

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 3:10 p.m. CST

    was a job by job thing. I haven't done it in a while,

    by Jonah Echo

    because Im trying to turn it into a more solid gig. At this point, Im basically trying a bit of everything and throwing it at the wall, and seeing if anything sticks.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 3:21 p.m. CST

    Egg, it's ok, though

    by Jonah Echo

    you do know you aren't "attacking" me. And it's not just because we aren't in the same room. The "person" you think you are attacking is so far and away different and seperate from myself, that you just seem looney. And there would be nothing that would make attacking Danny, I, Hobo or Fred, or Fred's amoeba any better except for the vision you have in your head. So I want everyone, yourself included, to understand this: <P> You log on here and hurl insults at IMAGINARY PEOPLE that probably all have Roald Dahl like characteristics, and then you get titillated by the IMAGINED responses these IMAGINARY people have. I am quite serious, and not trying to slag you. I think you need some help. Whether you are a 30 something soccer mom doing this to vent after her kids tore the house apart, or you are the school football team logging onto the libraries' computer, or if you are Judd Apatow himself, you might want to actually think about what you are doing. I feel legitimately sad for you.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 3:28 p.m. CST

    so, the dog story..you wrote that yourself?

    by Jonah Echo

    how long did it take you to do that? I hope you had that lying around, and didnt just write that to post on AICN. It would be sort of ...unfortunate.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 3:30 p.m. CST

    Ignore him Jonah

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    And keep telling us about your theater stories. You, Danny, Hobo and the rest had me crying earlier.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 3:31 p.m. CST

    Ok, Egg...I gotta head home..

    by Jonah Echo

    I'll say hi to the wife for you. Goodluck with your endeavor, whatever it is exactly. See any good movies recently?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 3:31 p.m. CST

    What the fuck happened to this TB?

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    Where is everyone?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 3:32 p.m. CST

    peace Jonah...

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 3:32 p.m. CST

    Jonah

    by ThereWolf

    You didn't honestly read all that?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 3:33 p.m. CST

    Yea, sorry HOD..

    by Jonah Echo

    the teacher in me started coming out. You know how you have the problem child student that everyone believes needs care? Of course reaching out to the unbalanced online is as effective as trying to insult the well adjusted via the same means.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 3:33 p.m. CST

    Sir Fruit Salad

    by ThereWolf

    Were you born on twat farm?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 3:34 p.m. CST

    Unfortunatly, working my ass off Danny

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    Never fails. I get into a good groove of posting and Damn! Here comes more work.<p> I wished I grew up in bigger town, as we were the ones others are probably telling stories about as far as pranks.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 3:35 p.m. CST

    therewolf..of course not...but

    by Jonah Echo

    it is clearly long, and it isn't done for my benefit, he posted it elsewhere. Im not his Kevin Dunn to his Mr. Glass, but that's what he is playing at. Thing is I've never attacked him once, just attempted to engage him in conversation. He doesn't like that latter approach.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 3:37 p.m. CST

    Anyway...adios boyos. I'll see you later on...

    by Jonah Echo

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 3:42 p.m. CST

    Jonah, don't feed the Trolls!

    by toadkillerdog

    Just ignore them and they get bored and go away. He only wants someone to acknowledge his pathetic existence - even if it is only getting banned. At least someone noticed him. Just a pathetic creature.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 3:50 p.m. CST

    Sorry, Danny, I strayed to other threads but...

    by Hawaiian Organ Donor

    ...I'm done so I'll keep posting here. I'm going to go read your Penguin post again. That was priceless.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 3:51 p.m. CST

    just imagine Ethan Suplee as the guy...

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 3:54 p.m. CST

    http://tinyurl.com/5bl5ln

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 3:55 p.m. CST

    HERE'S WHAT I DID IN THE LAST 2 MINUTES:

    by BringingSexyBack

    1) Ctrl-F <p> 2) Typed "penguin", hit Enter <p> 3) Read Danny's post <p> 4) LOLMAO <p> 5) Slurped cum off an ugly fat cock <p> (5 is for egg salad)

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 3:58 p.m. CST

    awwww bless you BSB.....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 4:01 p.m. CST

    lol

    by chipps

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 4:03 p.m. CST

    Sir Egg Salad -- if I could fuck Natalie Portman....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    ...uhh yeah...I'd be a lame duck for sure. Stupid fuck.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 4:15 p.m. CST

    Aww, shucks. Fred late again. Everyone gone home

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    Well, Fred read DannyGlovers story and spit cranberry juice! Fred was drinking cranberry juice at the time. That was a very funny story.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 4:19 p.m. CST

    thanks Fred. Its just you and me baby...

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 4:25 p.m. CST

    I'm here...

    by ThereWolf

    ... just going back and forth, looking for DVD's, nipping back here, going off again...

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 4:26 p.m. CST

    Hello Sir Egg Salad

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    Fred glad you not get banned. You say some funny things.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 4:27 p.m. CST

    Sir Egg Salad = worthless cunt

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    Jonah and myself are the only ones dumb enough to give a little boy like you attention. Anyone else can easily ignore a piece of trash like yourself. Again dude...you're not funny. That last line about Fred giving me a hand job. Seriously....what the fuck? Is that suppose to upset either Fred or myself? We don't fucking care. This is the last time I acknowledge you just to let you know you have lost it. You used to be far more entertaining but now you are just repetitive and dull. Maybe Jonah is right....maybe you're not the original Egg. Either way...fuck off. I'm done with you.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 4:27 p.m. CST

    Hello ThereWolf

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    Hee hee! Fred can't help it - just makes Fred laugh all the time. Did you read DannyGlovers penguin story?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 4:29 p.m. CST

    Sir Egg Salad - Dirk says hello!

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    Hee hee. Dirk is Fred's pet Amoeba in case you do not remember.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 4:30 p.m. CST

    Hey, Fred

    by ThereWolf

    Must've missed that. Where can I find it?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 4:32 p.m. CST

    3:10 to Yuma

    by chipps

    didn't really get into it. it was ok till the end, but the end was just crap. a)so many miss fired shots while they were out in the open b)poor motivation on the part of ben wade<p>

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 4:33 p.m. CST

    Danny just be glad the air was working

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    Can you imagine that guy blowing chunks and the stink it would give off if the air wasn't working.<p> Lucky that guy wasn't in the theater I saw it in. He probably would have gotten jumped by the lovely gang sitting near the front.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 4:36 p.m. CST

    ThereWolf

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    Typr Ctrl f then penguin. Fred learned how to do that today on this thread.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 4:36 p.m. CST

    Found the penguin

    by ThereWolf

    That is a blinder! Well played, Danny. This time I remembered not to have a drink while reading.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 4:38 p.m. CST

    i get very nervious when

    by chipps

    someone calls a film 'Australia' (ok it has only happened once). Imagine a film called 'America' or 'England'. troubling, troubling.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 4:41 p.m. CST

    I know what that guy was drinking Danny

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    Everclear!<p> That shit will kick you in the balls and laugh in your face.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 4:42 p.m. CST

    hehehe.....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 4:42 p.m. CST

    ChittyChittyGangBang

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    That couldn't happen to Fred!

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 4:44 p.m. CST

    if a film was called AMERICA....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    It better be about the greatest folk/rock band of all time, canvassing the country and nailing all sorts of bitches along the way!! Thats AMERICAN!!

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 4:45 p.m. CST

    if i met you i would fuck you up.

    by chipps

    I'm not just saying that cause im at a computer. if you are bigger than me i would fucking hit you with the shovel i keep by the door.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 4:48 p.m. CST

    strike that

    by chipps

    i wrote it before i read the last two sentences. just keep posting away tool.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 4:49 p.m. CST

    Everclear is potent elixer Fred

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    Everclear will get balls out of the Mason jar and reattach them just it can kick them.<p> If you gave Dirk a drop of Everclear he would turn into the Cloverfield monster within the hour.<p> And be twice as likely to pee, vomit and tell everyone how much he loves them in a drunken display.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 4:51 p.m. CST

    have you really gotten drunk from Everclear?

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    Is there anything you can mix it with? its sorta like vodka isn't it?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 4:52 p.m. CST

    In fact it was Everclear

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    mixed in Slusho, not sea bed nectar that created Cloverfield.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 4:52 p.m. CST

    Sir Egg Salad

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    Fred feels sorry for you. Fred really does. Of course you will get banned again. And of course you will come back. But why is it necesssary to try and hurt someone you do not even know? Fred bet's you would like to have friends - that is why you keep coming back to our thread. You would avoid it if you did not want to see the kind of camraderie that exists in our little group. After you come back from being banned again, why not try and be a part of our group? It is a lot of fun. They even accepted Fred!

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 4:55 p.m. CST

    Poor little Dirk

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    Fred would not like to see Dirk angry. You would not like Dirk when he is angry!

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 4:56 p.m. CST

    Oh Laws yes we've been drunk off Everclear

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    It is basically pure grain alchohol and it makes straight Vodka look like Evian water.<p> Our dumbasses got a bottle one night and started riding in a huge field covered in snow (It was one of four snows I remember in my lifetime here) and we started taking shots.<p> It was about the third round that I started buzzing and immediatly went into drunk mode in a violent transition just a few shots later.<p> We thought we had run out of gas, but we were in about 12 inches of mud just spinning our wheels.<p> You can finish a bottle and put it in a dark room.<p> Then place a lighter need the open end and it will light up the room.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 4:58 p.m. CST

    We used to mix it with different fruit juices

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    We would fill up a normal size cooler with fruit juices and peices of fruit.<p> Then put one bottle of Everclear in.<p> It would get an entire crowd drunk.<p> But beware mixing sweet drinks with alcohol as the hangover is brutal.<p> I git fdrunk on Hurricanes in New Orleans and my head was stapled to the mattress the next day.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 5 p.m. CST

    go to the following link

    by ChittyChittyGangBang

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Everclear_ (alcohol)<p> Take out space of course

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 5:01 p.m. CST

    Fred has left the building

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    Work day is over. Fred will try and check back later. Hope Dirk stays away from the Everclear!

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 5:02 p.m. CST

    Egg is spamming all threads BTW he'll be gone fairly soon

    by G100

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 5:02 p.m. CST

    pet peeve

    by chipps

    not really a peeve per se, but every notice in period movies ie godfather, but the list is long errr that thing you do ect, ever notice that ALL the cars are shinny new waxed versions of that particualar car. You never see old bombs in period movies. My theory is they have to go around to collectors ect so they can fill like one street for half an hour with the cars, and collectors obsessivly wax their cars, so collectors don't have dodgy old ones. i throw down the gauntlet and here by make this challage, name me one sence in one period movie, where the characters have a old bomb car from 20 years before the movie. mulholland falls? la confidential, untouchables? huh? huh?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 5:03 p.m. CST

    Chitty...I've heard plenty of stories about the stuff...

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    ...the funny thing is how damn cheap it is. Its like 7.99 for a massive bottle at a drug store....

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 5:03 p.m. CST

    and i agree with fred

    by chipps

    you should join our club. you and your friend.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 5:03 p.m. CST

    At this point I see Ethan Suplee dressed as the penguin

    by Jonah Echo

    and as he leans forward to fall, I hear gregorian chanting,interrupted by the sound effect of his face rubbing against the rubber guard on each step. My mind's eye has this recorded from four diff perspectives, and they play during the chanting like those fight scenes in Ong Bak, one after the other. Danny, I snickered all through work thinking bout that. Especially him out in the bushes with the cigarette, covered in chunks. <P> "Bro, what happened?" <P> "Nothin'. Just had to get something off my chest. Chillaxin now."

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 5:05 p.m. CST

    Chipps-- good peeve!!!

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    I constantly point that out about the waxed cars. Or the fact that ever transportation guy on a film is told "We need cars from the 50s...." or whatever era. So every car in say Back To The Future is from the 50s.......as if there were no cars left over from the 40s or 30s. They are only from the decade in which it takes place. I hate that. And you're right...no rusty old bombs in people's driveways or anything like that....

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 5:07 p.m. CST

    Off my chest....hahahaha.....that dude did have nice tits....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    Whats funny is he looked totally content outside in the bushes. Like it was a completely relaxing thing to do....and this is a nice family suburb theater, not a place where people go to get crazy at all. I would just never think of letting my piss drunk friend stumble outside after he hurled...I would instinctively follow him. But his buddy didn't give a shit...he said, "Fuck that....this is Dark Knight baby!!"

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 5:09 p.m. CST

    Peeve

    by ThereWolf

    It's not really a peeve. In genre movies, somebody's always got to say:<p>"We/you don't know exactly what we're/you're dealing with here."<p>I think it's a studio stipulation that this be the first line written in any script.<p>Damn that penguin keeps repeating on me.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 5:11 p.m. CST

    a huge peeve of mine!!

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    Any covert/CIA/assassin/government agent type shit......contractually has to have the line: "HE DOESN'T EXIST!! HE'S A GHOST!!" or something to that effect. And I see that new Don Cheadle movie Traitor follows the tradition.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 5:16 p.m. CST

    back to the future - only 7 years till we have flying cars

    by chipps

    oh please oh please oh please oh please. and hoverboards

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 5:22 p.m. CST

    i saw this great mad magazine back in the day

    by chipps

    it was their predator spoof. arnie gets blown up and they are like 'are you ok?' and he's like, 'ooohh noooo, i have sCraCted my kneeeee' and then at the end there is a nuclear explosion 'aaaaahhhgh i have sCracted my OTher kneeee' gold. <p> and remember back in the day you used to sit around drinking with your mates and say, just once, just once i would like to see the invincible van damm character die in one of the first scene. then along came executive decision and deep blue sea. I read the Segal practically refused to do that scene.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 5:28 p.m. CST

    Executive Decision

    by ThereWolf

    Good movie. I always wondered how they managed to convince Seagal to do a short slot. He can't have been happy to do that.<p>But you don't need a Seagal when you've got the mighty Kurt.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 5:31 p.m. CST

    True That -- I love both....but you don't NEED both...

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 5:32 p.m. CST

    i read somewhere he was a real egomaniac

    by chipps

    he actually belives that he is a semi god, the reincarnation of budda i believe. but yeah, he signed on for that movie knowing he would die straight up, but when it came around to it he threw a temper tantrum and sulked, and they only got the scene done after a lot of coxing and threatening and pointing to contracts.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 5:34 p.m. CST

    CHIPPS

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    Do you have proof Seagal is NOT a God?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 5:37 p.m. CST

    Seagal

    by ThereWolf

    Sings in a Blues band! And I'm sure I read somewhere that he does a song called 'Talk To The Ass.'<p>I can imagine the next line being something like 'because the face ain't listening.' That sounds bluesy.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 5:39 p.m. CST

    lol

    by chipps

    yes - he can count to infinity, like chuck norris can.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 5:47 p.m. CST

    I saw a video fo Seagal shredding on guitar....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    I think its on Youtube. But that fucker is awesome...and of course he has his tassled Native-American leather on....

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 5:52 p.m. CST

    you see, here is the thing...

    by Jonah Echo

    Seagal is now DTV, so why not get him to expand his horizons abit and do some crossover sequel work. For instance, Seagal in Starship Troopers, or in Scorpion King.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 5:53 p.m. CST

    Hey...

    by ThereWolf

    That cat can play! Just checked him out on YouTube. Whoo!

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 5:54 p.m. CST

    nice

    by chipps

    what was that recently one where he was in the jail with ja rule and the whole movie was head shots cause he is FAT

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 5:58 p.m. CST

    Fallen story

    by chipps

    i saw an interview with anthony hopkins where he said when silence of the lambs came out he would go into cinemas and when the movie ended he would lean over to the people in front of him and in a lector voice say something like 'i hope you liked the movie sv sv sv sv'

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 6:04 p.m. CST

    Half Past Dead...

    by ThereWolf

    I think - Seagal/Ja Rule. Unfortunately I fell asleep watching that one. Safe to say I wasn't rivetted by the story.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 6:10 p.m. CST

    Anthony Hopkins

    by Series7

    If there were one actor I could spend the day with it would have to be either him or Dustin Hoffman. Even though they are known as like the greatest actors alive right now, there is a reason they've been able to stay around for forever and sometimes make a bad movie, but its not because of them, they usually make bad movie bearable. Those two actors you can tell just love what they do. I've never heard stories of them being primadonnas on set, I think in the Marathon Man dvd there are a bunch of outtakes of Hoffman just fucking around and fucking up lines. Like they don't take them selves to seriously say like Morgan Freeman. Their only problem probably it that they care too much about making a good film, and is that really bad?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 6:14 p.m. CST

    Man

    by Series7

    Sir Egg Salad, I don't why we even acknowledge him? I mean the boner acts like he's above all this, but the soul fact that he is here makes him just as big of a geek as all of us.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 6:27 p.m. CST

    Hi everybody! Hey, Jonah...

    by Mavra Chang

    The next movie on my to-view-list will be another of your suggestions. "The Devil's Backbone" is an option this month on Fearnet's on demand. Good to have something lined up so easily for a night off from work. Thanks!

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 6:30 p.m. CST

    ThereWolf

    by Mavra Chang

    I saw on Wiki that the song might be available on a midi file. Haven't checked it out yet, but plan to a little later.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 6:33 p.m. CST

    Mavra..

    by Jonah Echo

    Hope you enjoy it. What did you think of Happiness of the Katakuris?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 6:34 p.m. CST

    Mavra Chang

    by chipps

    are you from the states? - just interested.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 6:35 p.m. CST

    Also, Steven Seagal's daughter..

    by Jonah Echo

    is in the Gamera:Guardian of the Universe films. Anyone here see those? Chitty, Danny, and anyone else, if you love giant monsters you owe it to yourself to see at least Gamera: Revenge of Iris. It came out in 1999 and one of the best kaiju movies out there. Fire-breathing turtle people! Fire breathing turtle! I'm serious. Check it out.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 6:35 p.m. CST

    Fred (whenever he returns)

    by Mavra Chang

    Sorry about the dart comment I made yesterday. I meant no offense. It was a poor attempt at humor and insensitive. No more, honest. Also, I find your manner of "speech" charming. Reminds me of Orcus, who also seems to be a pretty cool cat.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 6:40 p.m. CST

    Yes to both questions.

    by Mavra Chang

    The Happiness of the Katakuris was absolutely trippy!I've been telling people about it for two days now. I thought the description of "The Von Trapps in Dawn of the Dead" should have been more like "The Brady Bunch in Motel Hell", but I enjoyed it. It answered the burning question "How do you remove a dead naked sumo wrestler from an upper floor room?". Seriously, that whole scenario had me laughing out loud!<p>Chipps, I'm from Indiana.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 6:43 p.m. CST

    cool

    by chipps

    i don't think any of the other americans are from indiana. it good to have people from a range of locations because each person will pick up on stuff the others don't know about - like the interesting pikie/gypsy argument that happened a while back.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 6:46 p.m. CST

    I missed that discussion.

    by Mavra Chang

    What was it about, if it won't take up to much of anyone's time to clue me in?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 6:48 p.m. CST

    Fire breathing turtles?

    by Mavra Chang

    Another addition for me, as well. Don't think I've seen a turtle-inspired moster movie since "The Boogens".

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 6:49 p.m. CST

    um

    by chipps

    basically this guy pointed out (al la snatch) that pikies are not gypsies but 'traveling irishmen' I thought bulshit and looked up and according to wiki he was right. Then this other guy chimed in and said, you must have wikied that because while technically correct, to the average londoner there is no difference.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 6:50 p.m. CST

    And I am internally swearing

    by Mavra Chang

    for my lack of typing skills.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 6:52 p.m. CST

    Thanks, chipps

    by Mavra Chang

    I wasn't aware of that either. Did they face the same sort of discrimination that the gypsies have?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 6:53 p.m. CST

    Hello Mavra Chang

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    Fred missed you -so did Dirk; Freds pet Amoeba. Thank you for understanding about Freds sensitivity. It is a cross Fred must bear.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 6:54 p.m. CST

    Fred can't stick around long, but hope to be back on later

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    Ciao

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 6:55 p.m. CST

    i think

    by chipps

    based on the conversation that in Britain they are just considered the same. In ireland they are seen as a clan of vagrants.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 6:57 p.m. CST

    Hello Fred and Dirk!

    by Mavra Chang

    An Amoeba must be the coolest type of pet I've ever heard of. Did you name him after anyone in particular? My first thought would have been "Dirk The Daring" from "Dragon's Lair". Ahhh, nostalgia. I loved that video game!

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 7:01 p.m. CST

    I will add that to my trivia list, chipps

    by Mavra Chang

    I love gleaning bits of information like that.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 7:10 p.m. CST

    I want to toss in 1 thing for the everclear topic

    by Mavra Chang

    Since someone was asking for mixes with it. Mixed with grape soda it is called a "purple passion". At least around here, it has an old reputation of being an easy way to get non-drinkers drunk. I may be a gender-traitor for saying it, but it's usually considered a way to get girls plastered without them being aware of it. I had my own encounter with it many moons ago. Good stuff. Good reason why I don't drink now.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 7:26 p.m. CST

    Dammit, I'm too late

    by ebonic_plague

    Read this review earlier today and wanted to figuratively raise a fist in solidarity with Vern regarding the blue Power Ranger Scorpion King movie but then I get here and there's 2,000 posts already and all I can think to contribute to the conversation is that my friend once ran out of gas in the middle of nowhere and had a handle of Everclear and used it as fuel to get him to the gas station. DAMN YOU, AT-WORK NET-BLOCKER FOR NET COCK-BLOCKING ME AND NOT LETTING ME POST MY ORIGINAL, SLIGHTLY MORE INTERESTING THOUGHTS WHEN THEY FIRST OCCURRED TO ME AND WOULD HAVE BEEN MORE RELEVANT TO THE CURRENT DISCUSSION!

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 7:32 p.m. CST

    Garfield id look creepy

    by misnomer

    how hard would it have been to stick with the drawing?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 8:13 p.m. CST

    Mavra Chang

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    Do tell of your adventure with Purple Passion.....I'd love to hear more.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 8:18 p.m. CST

    I just watched the ROCKNROLLA trailer.....

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    ...and its funny how it looks exactly the same as Smokin' Aces, considering everyone said Carnahan was ripping off Guy Ritchie's style which I didn't really see. So RockNRolla looks like Guy ripping off Joe who ripped off Guy...sort of.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 8:44 p.m. CST

    Smokin Aces is pretentious refuse...

    by HoboCode

    that was ripping off Ritchie that was ripping off Tarantino.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 8:48 p.m. CST

    oh fuck that.......

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

    I hope you don't plan on trying to convince me Ritchie is a rip-off of Tarantino. Ritchie's dick could direct a better film than Tarantino. Fuck Quentin and all fungus on these TB's surgically attached to his balls.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 8:50 p.m. CST

    I'll try, Danny, although some of it...

    by Mavra Chang

    was told to me later. The memory of that night is a bit blurry. I was about 16. I was playing cards with friends at one of their homes. One of the guys had a 2-liter bottle of "grape soda", which he had was pouring for all. After I'd had a couple of glasses of it already, he started adding extra everclear to mine. I'm told that I had at least 3 or 4 glasses of the kicked-up batch.<p>Since I was the only one actually trashed, the rest of them thought it would be funny to take me around town. I got permanently banned from a store where they dared me to go make a pass at the clerk on duty. Instead of flirting with him, I was telling him how much one of the guys was lusting after him. My friends literally drug me out of there while I was yelling "He really, really, REALLY likes you!" at this poor fellow. <p>After that backfired on them, everybody scattered and left me with the guy who'd laced the soda. He drove me out to an empty K-Mart parking lot (how romantic!). There we were, all alone and I was not quite as bad off in the head as I'd been earlier. He turned on the car radio and began singing "Can You Feel the Love Tonight"....and I started laughing at him. It was soooo corny!!! I couldn't stop laughing. Ruined his mood completely. He took me home and that was the end of that. Not nearly as exciting as the majority of the stories you guys have told. I'm grateful for that!

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 8:53 p.m. CST

    when i think about i agree with hobocode

    by chipps

    i can see a link between smoking aces and ritchie and tarantino. it ritchie tarantino link is strong. especially with the use of music. i would also say that ritchie riffs off mad mad world and other ensemble pieces. and for that matter smith ie: inane conversation, but then, he riff offa tarantino there too. ie the milk speech in snatch, the burger speech in fiction. now off we me to rent rats of tobruk. or maybe rio bravo. TALLY-HO!

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 8:54 p.m. CST

    Mavra-- you are truly the man

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 8:59 p.m. CST

    chipps-- I just watched Rio Bravo last night...weird...

    by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:28 p.m. CST

    some punk rented them both!

    by chipps

    if i catch him i'll beat him with my shovel. I got serpico instead.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:34 p.m. CST

    you know

    by chipps

    i bet it was egg salad. yeah. i bet it was

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:40 p.m. CST

    wait a minute

    by chipps

    IT WAS YOU!!!!! Me, and aptow, and seth rogan, we are going to come around to your house, and pull down your drapes, stir your goldfish tank around, resest your vcr, mess up your lounge, hide one of every pair of socks and shoes set your clocks back ten minutes then go home and tell funny stories about it. Vengeance will be swift and just.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 9:51 p.m. CST

    God I hated RE3

    by Charlie_Allnut

    One of those movies that actually made me viscerally angry, like Hancock. Mulcahy tossed his career away years ago. Incidentally he directed a Mummy ripoff shortly after the original came out.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:06 p.m. CST

    Anyone around?

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    Fred hanging out with Dirk for a little while. Dirk is a very cool Amoeba.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:07 p.m. CST

    Hi, Fred and Dirk

    by Mavra Chang

    What are you two up to tonight?

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:12 p.m. CST

    Hello Mavra Chang

    by Freds_Balls_in_a_Mason_Jar

    Dirk is a night owl- er, Amoeba. He (Gred beleives Dirk is a he, but Fred has no real proof) likes to eat popcorn and watch TCM until early in the morning. Fred has gotten up many a nights to turn off the TV

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:12 p.m. CST

    I'm here

    by chipps

    watching serpico cause danny rented 'rats' and 'rio'. It's interesting. the dvd is good quality so you can see where, in shot where the foreground and background are in focus they have spliced two films together because the background of the fore ground shot isn't in focus.

  • Aug. 19, 2008, 10:14 p.m. CST