Cool News
Cohen's Got Nards!!
Merrick here...
In an interview with Bloody Disgusting, Rob Cohen (director of xXx, THE FAST AND THE FURIOUS, and THE MUMMY: TOMB OF THE DRAGON EMPEROR - which appears to be everything KINGDOM OF THE CRYSTAL SKULL was not) revealed that Paramount has acquired the rights to THE MONSTER SQUAD & indicates he's considering producing (but not necessarily directing) a remake of the film.
If the skies soon darken in your area...and if and a bone-chilling rumble rolls ominously across the land...it means Quint has just heard this news.
More from the Bloody Disgusting article HERE!
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Unless they get Dekker and the original MS back then screw this remake,all I can picture is Van Helsing for kids,no thanks.
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80's sensibility is what drove this movie. We won't see the new Rudy chain smoking, there'll be no 'been dorked' conversation, and they won't all be calling Horace 'Fat Kid'.
Monster Squad was great because it was how kids actually talked. No way in hell will they duplicate that. It'll be fucking Spy Kids with classic movie monsters. -
So you mean it's bad? Really bad? Cause Indy was a good movie. For people who claim they are cool...their asses are really clenched tight when it comes to fun.
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Please NO! Please NO!
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If they are remaking Monster Squad you know what will be next:
Gremlins
Cloak And Dagger
Young Sherlock Holmes
Flight Of The Navigator
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Jul 16, 2008 10:34:39 AM CDT
The only thing that could make Monster Squad worthwhile...
by fassbinder79
Would be to have Mike White or Shane Black returning to write the script.
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My third day on AICN and still no chance being first. Could you please wait when the next post comes up so I get that off my chest? Thanks.
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Fuck you.
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he has to have more balls than brains to try and remake the Monster Squad.
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they could rename and remake all the old films: flight of the fast and the furious navigator.....
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Jul 16, 2008 10:42:25 AM CDT
i think the manatees from family guy run hollywood in their spar
by notspock2
director balls and remake balls seem to have replace "inspiration" "originality" and "creativity"
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Cohen is an incompetent with no vision or imagination. What about these facts makes him a director/producer people wish to work with?
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This movie gives me such great memories of my childhood. I can remember the day I saw it with my mom. This actually is not cool news. Now we get to look forward to CGI monsters that no kid in this world will be afraid of and will look waxy, watered down and shiny... Remake something else instead, asshole.
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By which I assume you mean, not the biggest grossing movie of the year.
Oh and I know it just goes without saying, but Monster Squad does NOT need to be remade. The original was a perfect take on what it was supposed to be. What's to update? Will Wolfman have CGI nards in this one? -
here, have a d.. add it to the word "replace" and then you'll know what I was talking about
mental note... BE PERFECT when you are talking about how dumb other people are... -
De-evolution is very real.
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Why is AICN the only site on the internet who thinks Mummy 3 is going to be good?
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Why? Why do this? I am now in firm belief that whomever produces, writes, directs, or in anyway brings a remake of a movie that is less then 40 years old to the movie screen should be paid a fraction of someone who brings something original to the screen. I am not talking sequels, I am talking remakes. There are more then enough original ideas out there, Hollywood just doesn't want to spend the resources to get them. You want a Rob Zombie directed Halloween, then make a sequel that is good, not a "reimagining"...
In 10 years 60% of our films will be remakes.... -
The concept of Kids vs. Monsters is a great one. So take that idea and make a new movie, NOT a straight up remake of this one. I mean, it worked well for Monster House!
A lot of people just discovered this movie when it recently came to DVD. So, it is too fresh in their minds to have a Remake. Someone else also said that it was a very 1980s take on the subject--and it is. It is also why a Robocop remake will fail. Both those movies are such a part of 1987 that you cannot have them at any other time. Kind of like watching Galaxy Rangers episodes now...just doesn't work.
Personally, I'd like to see Fred Dekker direct a movie again instead. -
that Rob Cohen could've made a better INDY film that Spielberg did. Whatever problems I may have with Indy 4, that's beyond ludicrous. Rob Cohen is basically the ugly hack step cousin to Michael Bay, Bay just always gets bigger budgets.
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turns out it wont be a remake but a sequel, story revolves around the fact its been 20yrs since Robo and i assyme he;s been dismantled or least "fired" because they are now considering reactivating the program.
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my dad loved the magnificent 7 as a kid, then one day he watched it as a grown up and realized it was moronic. That's how I feel about monster squad.
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The original is seriously one of the movies that just hold up because of nostalgia. I mean, I saw it for the first time when I was 21 and it did nothing for me (And usually I'm someone who enjoys a good kids movie!)
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FUCK OFF! I get it wasn't every single thing that every single person wanted, but that comment was totally unnecessary. Only served to hurt feelings. And I'll eat Rhino shit the day a Mummy movie is better than an Indiana Jones.
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Why?
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Ever since Goonies, that guy's been MIA.
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Jul 16, 2008 11:22:34 AM CDT
Never thought I would actually Hate Rob Cohen
by nomoredirtyjokespleaseweareyanks
I know he is simply B-grade and have always enjoyed him as such.Just walk away my man and we can still be friends. I also find it funny how quickly some of these staffers suddenly have a problem with Indy 4.
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Jul 16, 2008 11:25:56 AM CDT
also, having seen Indy 4 three times now
by nomoredirtyjokespleaseweareyanks
I gotta say I like it a lot.
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. . . by Crystal Skull bashing needs a good beating. Grab the reins, McFly.
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Epic Movie, Date Movie, and the rest of those clusterfucks to come up with a spoof simply titled "Remake!".
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Did you hit your head this morning? You're not seriously trying to tell us The Mummy is better than Indiana Jones are you?
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Why a fucking remake?! If you just HAVE to do something with it, can't you make a new one? A sequel that sucks would be preferable to treading the same ground again.
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Then they could fight the It's Alive baby, Q the Winged Serpent and Black Caesar (or team up with him, not sure...)
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Use the original cast, and have the new squad be their kids. That way you make us, the fans, happy that you're not remaking it, but you can still tell a contained new story.
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Unfortunately I don't think that would work if for no other reason than because the dude who played Horace is dead.
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Eve nthe worst fucking Indy movie is betetr than any bullshit in the Mummy franchise. Have you see nthe fake CGI dragon and yeti? Fuck that shit.
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I say no to this remake. I was 10 when Monster Squad came out and I watched that shit over and over and over... A remake is the WORST FUCKING idea possible.
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Should feature a bunch of kids vs. Freddy Kreuger, Chucky, Leprechaun, Rawhead Rex, Troll, and Jason Voorhees(as the sympathetic befriended monster.) Since they'll probably make that movie in 10 years anyway. Why wait?
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He's thinking of ideas of a thriller built around the new iPhone...call it "iTerror".
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Right up there with Aptow/Cohen/Farrell Sherlock Holmes movie and the Plastic Man news! We are truly entering a golden age.
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I love this site- one of the things I love most is how movies that are not even out, not seen (often times not even finished being MADE) are deemed to be the best movie ever made in the history of movies ever. Or at least better than other movies out there. "Be Kind Rewind" anyone? That was said to be the greatest thing ever. "Forgetting Sarah Marshal" was said to be the funniest, best comedy ever in the history of movies even before it came out. Now, the Mummy 3 is everything Indiana Jones IV was not, and it is not even out yet!
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I guess I'm the only one who noticed all the shitty dialogue in the trailers. Not even shitty-but-okay-for-this-kind-of-movie bad, just plain shitty, horrific dialogue. Whatever one may thought of Indiana Jones, there's no way in hell Mummy 3 with Brendan Fraser running around spouting more of the series' staple horrible writing will be better than Crystal Skull.
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You're a fucking idiot.
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They're fun to watch if you have nothing else to do, but for crissakes, the Indiana Jones Disneyland ride has better dialogue and plotting.
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Jesus.
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HAHAHA... WHY AM I LAUGHING
THERE'S A MUMMY ON THE LOOSE
Seriously, I can usually overlook bad/hokey dialogue in movies like this, but that is just plain fucking... agonizing writing. Spielberg and Koepp on their worst days are still above tripe like that. -
I think every cast member has to say "mummy" as least once throughout the trailer. Is that to remind us that the movie is about..ummm..mummies?
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I mean... Everything KOCS did right... It doesn`t... Right?
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Why destroy such a perfect movie with a remake. How about buying some quality original scripts and making those instead?
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...it's not THE Monster Squad!
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Haven't see the Mummy movie yet. But the trailer for Mummy 3 is better than Crystal Skull. Sorry guys, but that movie was shit.
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...talkback? Cause I thought it was. Oh, yeah, here's a message to all geeks from a fellow geek who does some (low profile, unimportant) work in the industry - When you shit all over a movie that was made for the fans when it didn't have to be, and, while flawed, was easily better than Batman & Robin, or any number of terrible sequels, you make sure that the next sequels or movies made because of that one will truly suck. Here's another message: When you do stupid bullshit by comparing a filmmaking legend to a fucking dilletante, you demean us all.
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At least Indy mixes up his villains and MacGuffins. Brendan Fraser ONLY fights Mummies and is the ONLY guy in the world who runs smack dab into this specific menace? Jesus. You'd think after 3 mummy attacks by two different mummies the character would just move to Canada and leave Africa and Asia be.
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Jul 16, 2008 1:04:52 PM CDT
Monster Squad vs. Freddy vs. Jason vs. Myers vs Leatherface
by wickedjester
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The original holds up still with me. The version that would be released today would work better as a Saturday Morning cartoon then a movie. You need not look further than the *new* Bad News Bears to see some movies only worked because of their time periods.
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Atleast that would 'please' most people, you still can sap off the name, but as said, it wouldn't be 'real.' I don't need to see a politically correct MS. I don't need the kid yelling 'Wolfman's got nards,' to do it through sign language because he's deaf -- you just know one of the kids is going to be handicapped in the remake.
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Maybe they can include the disabled kid from Malcolm in the Middle! Wouldn't that ROCK!?!?
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Lighten up, Francis.
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loved the revamped creature designs from the Universal originals. If this is redone, expect to see CGI up the ying yang, instead of practical make-up, because of CGI-crazy Cohen.
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Jul 16, 2008 1:30:17 PM CDT
The trailer for this was better than the Crystal Skull
by aversiontherapy2
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It was called Van Helsing.
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and THAT sucked.
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this is bullshit. the only thing that would be mildly amusing would be the kids all grows up, working their way through their dead end, bullshit, jobs and fighting the monsters alongside their kids. that would be straight to DVD, but I'd rent that shit.
of course, with the fat kid being dead, that would bum everybody out, but Jonah Hill could probably rep that role. -
There are many movies I never want to see be remade. Apparently, Hollywood got a hold of my list and got the message mixed-up because they spend way too much time remaking movies I love.
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Because I swear he writes like a message board troll. Always taking his little fucking jabs at shit that he knows others enjoyed. And seriously? Mummy 3? Fucking... seriously?? Get fucked. Forgive me.
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the kids today are douchebags who would get killed while texting.
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They'll remake the original Brendan Fraser MUMMY and the sons and daughters of we TBers are going to have a fit. "Who can replace Arnold Vosloo? My childhood...RAPED! What's next, a remake of Godzilla without the Nick Tatopulous character?"
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Is this something that is supposed to bring out excitement? I hope for the parents of these child actors that they get someone else to produce.
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they fight jason, freddy, mike myers, leatherface and chucky. that would 70 billion-thousand dollars.
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Jul 16, 2008 3:02:16 PM CDT
just make a new film about kids fighting new monsters
by jackiegleasonufo
why does it have to be a remake? its not a popular franchise. the movie was perfect, you could just rerelease it and make money. of course the new one will have a black kid a chinese kid a mexican and a kid in a wheel chair and ofcourse no cursing. gizay.
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Jul 16, 2008 3:04:41 PM CDT
everything indy was not means it will be a bad movie
by jackiegleasonufo
cause indy 4 was all good
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There will be no semblance of dramatic tension, no acknowledgement of character growth, no dialogue more complicated than smarmy trailer-friendly sound bites, no sense of grandeur or history...neat. Crystal Skull's mixed reviews at the beginning of summer have sure turned into a big ol' bitchfest at its expense. It's always fashionable to crap on Lucas around here I guess. Did I love Crystal Skull? No. Did I think there was a fair amount of cheese? Sure. Could it have been better? Definitely. But if you guys were waiting for another RAIDERS...I don't see why you guys were so slap happy about it considering TEMPLE and CRUSADE didn't live up to the original either...or did you guys all forget that while picking at your PHANTOM MENACE scabs?
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I just wanted a good movie. Something comparable to Temple of Doom.
What I got was shit.
Boring, uninteresting shit. -
THEY BETTER HAVE THE MONSTER SQUAD RAP AT THE END OF THIS MOVIE!
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when they made it better than Indy 4. How dare it???
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And that was a better movie than Indy 4.
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How many people wanna bet that Killer Clowns From Outer Space is being considered for a remake?
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what
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how Indy 4 differs from any of the other Indy movies? honestly you guys hate it because you wanted to. I loved it because it was the best movie in a summer of fanastic movies. plus Karen Allen is still a ride. thats a romantic statement in my town.
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I hate Rob Cohen.
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As a kid I always thought it was a cheap knock off of Goonies. Maybe I should give it another chance.
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First of all how can you think this movie is crap? It's one of the only films of it's ilk in which kids actually talk like fucking kids. Constantly bagging on each other and swearing, it's great. Yeah as far as Shane Black goes it's not his best dialogue but for a kids film it's fantastic. If you think a remake made nowadays is going to improve where the original failed you're a fucking idiot. It might look more expensive sure, but the dialogue will be dumbed down to insufferability and the kids wont' act like kids and probably won't even be played byu kids. They'll get whatever talentless souless factory made "actor" in their early twenties but looks babyfaced to make them money on their name. I mean for chrissakes it's produced by Rob Cohen. I don;t think I need to elaborate ont hat point for it to have the desired impact. Whatever the original lacks in some shoddy pacing and a low budget it more than makes up for with heart and soul, something kids films today NEVER have outside of Pixar. A few weeks ago I showed it to my roommate, who is 24,and he loved it just as much as those of us who saw it when we were kids. It still works today, it sucks for you if you can't recognize the nuance.
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deliver on the promise of an INDIANA JONES film, go right ahead and kill yourself.....No seriously, I'll wait. The problem with Indy 4 was that it was just like the Mummy movies. Soulless, over CG, terrible story, and over the top cartoony action bullshit. If you think the Mummy 3 directed by Rob "Fast and the Furious, Stealth" COhen is going to suddenly change the franchise and be watchable then you, sir, are a moron. That goes doubly if you think that the Mummy films have somehow carried the torch of Indiana Jones. Only the dumbest of simpletons can't understand the difference in franchises.
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If you did I might havent prevent this. Why you no show pictures of this awesome prop trophy to ICN'ERs???? No seriously you havent show it publicly once?!?!?!?! Fucks with my head cause you don't really see it well in the movie. It's always too far away. Trust me I've looked for it.
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Since Hollywood still hasn't found the balls..or nards... to produce original material or adapted material, they insist on pulling the retarded shenanigans of remaking classics or semi-classics that really didn't need remaking in the first place. I think the actors/actresses in Hollywood should strike about the needless remakes that we've had forced upon us.
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With Shia as Marty and The Rock as Biff. For the guitar solo at the end he could play something dark and goth. "Your kids are gonna love it"
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I told my 14 yr-old brother about this article and his exact response was "Why? It's perfect the way it is." So any hypothetical argument they might give, should they go through with this, about remaking it for today's kids would go right out the window. They'd probably make more money if they re-released it.
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Or maybe stop being a fucking retard because everything about Mummy 3 looks gawdawful.
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This, and Robocop. Fuckers.
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...would be if it were picked up by Universal (where Dekker wanted to make the film to begin with), so the monsters could look like the '30s movie versions they were meant to.
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After all, he got his opinion from his sixteen year old son. Don't you talkbackers know that Brendan Frasier is in these days and Harrison Ford is washed up. I mean check out Brendan's alluring smile. Who wouldn't fall in love with that set of teeth? You should see him in 3D, he's absolutely dreamy. What does Ford have, a grizzled lived in presence?
What's that you say? The first two Mummy films were even more ridiculous and cartoony than Indy 4 so why do I think this new one will be any different? Well I have my sources, and one of them happens to be Merrick's sixteen year old son. -
There was this film in development called Creature Features. The premise reminded me of Monster Squad sorta. It dealt with a camera having the power to bring things to life. It got me to imagining something better with kids and monsters. Theres a guy named Forest Ackerman, he like Bob Burns has an extensive collection of monster memorabilia. I thought wouldn't it be weird if they made a movie about a character like him dying in the beginning of the film. His son and his grandson move into his house. It's full of 1:1 replicas of Dracula, Werewolf, Frankensteins Monster, The Creature From The Black Lagoon. Silicone 1:1 replicas of Vincent Price, Rando Hatton, Thor Johnson, Vampiria Charles Laughtons Hunchback, London After Midnight. 1:1 replicas of Krueger, Myers, Jason, Chucky, Miria Gremlins Stripe and Gizmo. An original Mighty Joe Young puppet. Ghoulies. Puppet Master Toys, Tons of resin monster kits of Dr. Jekyll Mr. Hyde Rat Fink. All sorts of monster toys and such. The grandson finds this old strange sheet of papaya in a compartment located in the base of a display case displaying a silicone replica of Jack Pierces head. He reads passage with his new friends. Suddenly all of the monsters come to life. Dracula attacks the grandson and flies off with the papaya sheet. Pieces head becomes a side kick to help the kids get the papaya back which turns out to be a sheet from the book of the dead. Meanwhile all of these monsters set off on a rampage through the town. Vincent, Pierce, Rondo, Thor, Vampira, Laughton and these kids set off to stop the monsters. Dracula raises the dead halfway in upping the stakes. He convert most of the chicks in the town into vampires. I just think it would be cool all those great monsters of film come alive in one big showdown of sorts. Seeing and hearing Vincent Price a very silicone looking version of him being himself and on the good guys side. Jack Pierces head alive and talking. I mean the godfather of the universal monster set after his monsters.
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It is.
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Fucking retarded.
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You mean, a bad movie?
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Of course the kewl kids known him. He's from Van Helsing too (not 2). Duh.
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FUCK YOU YOU WHORE. Nobody likes you.
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Jul 17, 2008 1:22:58 AM CDT
Great. Another remake. My subject title is a remake of a remake
by roketopunch
Sweet Titties of Aphrodite. Another remake, this time of a crappy movie. People should boycott remakes, that way they might make new ones.
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I guess Merrick thought his snide comment about Indy 4 would rally the talkbackers to his whiny fanboi cause. Instead were all turning on him. Me included, fuck you Merrick Indy 4, whilst far from brilliant was really good and better than Crusade in my book. To infer that a Mummy film, A FUCKING MUMMY FILM, is better from a couple of trailers is the sort of batshit crazy talk I expect from the disheveled tramp, with a habitual masturbation problem that lives in the bushes round the corner from my flat.
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Of course he's asking for it. I don't know what he expected to come out of his Indy 4/Mummy 3 comparison, but he had to know he would have started controversy and thus he deserves all the shit thrown on him. Indy 4 had its flaws, but I felt the good outweighed the bad. In other words, it was just like Indy 2 and 3. Flawed, but ultimately enjoyable films.
My guess is that Merrick was getting a handjob from Brendan Frasier while he was typing those words. "Oh, yes Brendan, Monkeybone was better than Indy 4 too. Your career isn't in the shitter. Do you hate cats too? Let's move to Massachusetts." Not that there's anything wrong with that. -
Indy 4 did in many ways resemble those Mummy films more than it did any Indy film. Bwa ha ha! Hate, fanboys, hate! Give me all you got! sorry...
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Then he can fuck with mythology all he wants.
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Monki is an even bigger fuckwit.
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Jul 17, 2008 1:39:49 PM CDT
Merrick and Quint are the only two writers on here who piss me o
by tallboy66
Merrick mainly because his taste just falt out sucks, and Quint because his taste flat out sucks (movies Quint likes: Cars! King Kong! The Strangers!) and he goes off on his editorializing tangents randomly in the middle of interviews that makes reading them a chore. And the majority of his "reviews" are just plot recaps. And Quint's comic book references, which he drops when talking about random adapted projects, are simplistic at best. Herc's Whedon love would piss me off, and he can be a tad snide about his Likes and Dislikes, but he can turn a phrase real good and he likes Lost and 24 so it can't be all that bad. Also, when Herc drops some comic knowledge, you can tell he knows what he's talking about.
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MONSTER SQUAD, yet flawed was a big favorite for many and the timing for that movie was perfect! You can't copy that magic--EVER! Remaking it is just a shitty attempt at making money by pissing off the very SAME people that would have paid for a decent sequel! But adding fuel to the fire of that comment of Mummy 3 insinuating its better Indy 4; what did you see an early screening?!? Coz if you did, shouldn't a review come out?!?! OR were you balls deep in man-luv that you didn't bother to write one?! Indy was flawed--no doubt about that, but in no way, shape,or form is Mummy3 better than Indy 4. AICN is only good for one thing now! And that's the talkbacks!
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