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Mr. Beaks Sifts Through the Wreckage of HANCOCK
SPOILER ALERT !!
Shorter than LAST ACTION HERO and less of a "WTF?" jumble than HUDSON HAWK (a movie I dearly love all the same), Will Smith's HANCOCK is the mess that results from the world's biggest movie star getting "edgy" on a studio's dime. Blessed with a great hook ("What if Superman were a homeless, alcoholic misanthrope?"), but (presumably) cursed with too much interference from the same creative team that neutered I AM LEGEND, Big Will's attempt at superhero revisionism is a moment-to-moment affair - one or two scenes are close to brilliant, a few are rousing in the best summer movie tradition, many are go-nowhere compromises - that ultimately negates its reason for being with a pointless, all-smiles denouement. Forget those tantalizing rumors about story elements involving statutory rape and superhuman ejaculation; all of Hancock's sharp edges have been sanded down for four-quadrant consumption.
As for who did the sanding, that's a far more interesting question than anything raised by the film (actually, I'm not sure this cut of the film raises any questions other than "Why bother?"). The lingering, R-rated rowdiness - e.g. Hancock hurling f-bombs at innocent bystanders, the head-up-the-ass gag, the resolution of the hostage crisis in the bank - is all pretty clearly the influence of director Peter Berg, who's been cultivating a churlish, guy's guy aesthetic since his dark comedy debut, VERY BAD THINGS. Unfortunately, Berg is not his mentor, Michael Mann (who cameos as a corporate executive in HANCOCK) - and even if he was in the final cut club, he'd still have an exceptionally hard time convincing the studio that it's in their best interest to slap a restrictive rating on their $150 million-plus, Will Smith-starring 4th of July cash cow.
The film, by the way, gets off to an excruciatingly rough start. While I suppose it's possible that Berg's responsible for inserting the clean version of Ludacris's "Move Bitch" into the film's opening action sequence (the one from the trailer where Hancock tears up the 105 Freeway trying to apprehend some heavily-armed gang bangers), this feels like a relieved studio sanitizing whatever they can, as early as they can, to keep concerned parents from yanking their kids out of the theater within the first ten minutes. Regardless of who's to blame, it's just a lame and timid and utterly needless capitulation to the MPAA - the only thing worse than getting assaulted with that song six years after it hit "overplayed" status is getting subjected to the radio-friendly edit at the outset of a movie that's trying to set a raucously profane tone.
It doesn't help that the car-flipping action set piece it plays us into is essentially a carbon copy of the impressive highway ambush from Berg's THE KINGDOM. But if Berg's on autopilot, Will is, as ever, on, trash-talking the bad guys as has been his jocular wont since BAD BOYS and INDEPENDENCE DAY. And if you're still wondering why this guy's the biggest movie star in the world, there's your answer: he respects his audience too much to ever phone it in. He is emphatically, 100% committed to entertaining each and every ticket-buyer from start to finish; he's more like James Brown or Prince in this regard than, say, Tom Cruise.
I do, however, get the sense that Will is emulating Cruise (who largely followed the lead of Paul Newman), which is smart insofar as career longevity is concerned (just keep your damn feet off Oprah's couch, Will). That said, he's beginning to encounter the same difficulties Cruise faced in the early-to-mid '90s, when the hotshot act from TOP GUN uneasily gave way to the "Master Thespian" growing pains of INTERVIEW WITH A VAMPIRE. I already think Will's a more versatile actor than Cruise (based on ALI alone), but he's definitely struggling with an inclination to push his audience outside of their comfort zone. A great night out at the movies isn't enough anymore; he wants his $200 million-grossing entertainments to be about something.
This is all very admirable, but it ain't working out just yet. The original, darker ending of I AM LEGEND had to be dumped in favor of a more comforting conclusion; meanwhile, HANCOCK, the script about a foul-mouthed superhero who behaves monstrously because he can, is now a reassuring fable about a godlike creature who learns to love the ungrateful little shits he's been placed on Earth to protect. Is he a wantonly destructive flipside to the Superman archetype or a metaphor for American might run amok? With a little more focus, and (most likely) a lot less input from producers and execs, it's possible he could've been one of these things lucidly rather than neither of them incoherently.
Interestingly, the film's most fleshed-out character is Ray Embrey (Jason Bateman), an idealistic publicist (again, it's fantasy) who offers his image rehabilitation skills to Hancock after the inebriated antihero saves his life from an onrushing train (thus setting off a disastrous, chain-reaction wreck in the process). Though we still don't know how long the world's been living with this self-destructive iteration of Hancock, Ray still thinks it's absurd for a do-gooder to draw such extreme derision, so he convinces Hancock to surrender to the authorities and pay his debt to society for a few months (a purely voluntary gesture since no manmade prison could possibly hold the guy). He's hesitant at first, but Hancock finally agrees because he likes Ray's kid and is bewitched by his smokin' hot wife, Mary (Charlize Theron), with whom he must have history since they keep exchanging meaningful glances whenever Ray's not looking.
Since the film is absent a supervillain or much in the way of conflict, this unspoken whatever is the sole story element that keeps us engaged up until the end of the second act. In other words, the film would be an interminable bore - even at ninety minutes - without the chemistry of its three leads, who invest the schizophrenic material with much more integrity than it deserves. One problem with Theron's delayed reveal is that you know a Best Actress Oscar winner isn't getting relegated to housewife status in a film like this; perhaps if Will had been allowed to play more of a cad, their sexual tension might've had a whiff of danger to it. As it stands in this cut of the picture, it's just an insultingly telegraphed setup.
For a while, it looks like Hancock is going to be both hero and villain in this story (i.e. once he realizes he does have a past with Mary, he's unwilling to fly away gracefully), but the narrative quickly gets conventional and shoehorns in a gang of escaped convicts who want to even the score with Hancock. This is where a wise man gives up on Berg's film and hopes that the forthcoming director's cut (headed your way for the holidays) makes a little more sense. In the meantime, if Will is serious about this art shit, he really ought to team up with Michael Mann again, 'cuz Little Mann just got steamrolled by Sony.
Faithfully submitted,
Mr. Beaks
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Could'a watched Hancock tonite, decided to get drunk instead.
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A villain's absence in the trailer made me wonder what the hell the film was about and how it possibly could be interesting. A movie without a story tends to keep me away. As is the case here.
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Will Smith can pretty much earn money for any project at this point. No more "Ali" days for him.
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Jul 01, 2008 12:39:46 AM CDT
WILL SMITH...please do more acting, less "action"...
by the marquis de side 3
...because your film "PURSUIT OF HAPPYNESS" was good at showing what a great actor you could really be if you could stop prostituting yourself as this big bad "tough guy" mouthing off the villains. It got boring after "ID4" and "BAD BOYS". Really quick. So please, DON'T be like Tom Cruise. Just be yourself and stop trying to be the great action hero Hollywood is turning you into. Give us something different with each movie. Which at this point is ANYTHING but characters like "Hancock" =0(
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seriously? would love that...
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As I said in the review, (and you shouldn't be reading this if you don't want to be spoiled), the escaped convicts are the late-arriving villains of the piece.
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worst first attempt ever. last time i ever try that. i don't even really care...
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I wasn't really looking forward to Hancock after the original trailer graced the movie screens. But as the TV Spots started popping up closer to the movies opening, I thought that it could be more than another "Blankman." Well, I saw a sneak peek of the flick tonight and was entertained. It's not the next "Iron Man' but it was a fun ride. You can definitely tell that Will Smith is trying to create another franchise with his new hero, one that I'd watch again as long as the character keeps his troubled nature to some extent. The cast is well rounded and the action sequences are thrilling. It's a fun movie, no matter what this site's reviewer thinks. It's not a masterpiece, but it's not a train wreck either.
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Very meh.
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Damn you to hell!
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Jul 01, 2008 12:53:22 AM CDT
Well that review above by TroyG sums up Hollywood exec approach
by spectrebeeyatch
Why actually try and make something new and interesting when you can just have a watered down pg-13 movie that is "okay". Here is my problem: Hancock who goes around telling people to fuck off, then goes and fucks bitches and is actually a bad dude at first is more interesting than the pg-13 version of him. So he destroys shit as he stops bad guys... umm who gives a shit Batman and Spider-man do the same fucking thing. It's like they have an interesting idea for a movie and then shit on it. I see no point in seeing this movie. The selling point should be he is a super hero who is a fucking asshole. More interesting would be what happens if there was a guy like that with powers who did nothing but do what he wants? Not wreck shit as he stops criminals but I mean a guy who rips off doors to places and just uses his powers to be an ass. Then he learns to be good and blah blah and then fights an actual villain who has powers and enjoys hurting people. THAT SHOULD BE THE MOVIE. This watered down pg crap looks boring and he doesn't look that bad to start with at least he is stopping bad guys. Fuck this movie at least Wanted had balls to be R and had a fun time with it. This looks like I Am Legend all over again where a good movie is hiding behind executive stupid decisions. Rant over.
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By the way, If you've ever wondered what happened to the actor who played "Ogre" in "Revenge of the Nerds" and who was also in HBO's "1st & Ten," you'll get your answer in the Jail AA scenes. Just thought I'd pass that along to any 80's fans out there.
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Its the Curse of the Cruise. WS is the latest victim.
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Didja mean the ending where Will Smith blows himself up or the original ending where he finds the nice butterfly tattoo on the creature and hands her back? Beacuse the tame, pussied-up ending is on the DVD and the dark, I-blew-myself-up, ending was in the theatrical cut. That's all. And besides, there hasn't been big bucks spent on a fucked-up movie since Miami Vice; what makes anyone think they're gonna do that with Big Willie Style and the Asshole of Steel script? Just sayin'.
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Damn, they got their mitts on this movie too? I am not watching. This should have been far more hardcore and playing up the absurdity of superheroes. And Will, quit recruiting/stalking Theron! Stay out of her interviews. XENU, XENUUUU!!
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Awww hells, naw!
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"he respects his audience too much to ever phone it in"? Me no think so. He's been doing the same "Aww HAIL naw!" for ages now. He rarely drops that sctick unless he's in an Oscar state of mind. I wish he was in that mood more often. He'd catch far less shit if he actually, you know, ACTED rather than played on his public nice-guy persona all the fucking time.
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I'd be really interested to hear your thoughts on it. The original script is pretty taut, in some respects almost like the Straw Dogs of the superhero genre. It could have been a real stand-out... granted if a whole slew of variables ended up clicking into place, the least of which if Michael Mann was still the director and if he also had total carte blanche to do whatever he wanted.
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is COMPLETELY wasted and pointless in this movie. That whole twist is completely pointless, goes nowhere, and is shoddily explained. "Oh we're gods...no, we're angels...wait, we're immortal...wait, but we can't be close or we'll get cooties!" I cannot wait until people lay eyes on this thing. Good grief.
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Seriously, What was wrong with it?
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everyone i know seems to like it, so why is it always put down?
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Saying the problem with I Am Legend was that they used the wrong ending is like saying that the problem with Star Wars Episode 3's problem is Darth vader yelling "NOOOOOO!!!" It's stupid yes, but only begins to scratch the surface of how bad the film is. I Am Legend was awful right after the first 15 minutes. I'll give SMith those first 15, after that it becomes his typical awful blockbuster, source material bastardizing crap. And Hancock looks to be no different. I bet when they realease the R rated directors cut it's still garbage just with more swearing. The problem with Smith isn't that he isn't edgy enough, its that he makes bad movies that always ceaselessly glorify him somehow. Hancock, even with edgier material, will still be a movie where one man gets his head stuck another guys ass. Adam Sandler is somewhere cursing the gods that he didn't think of that first. The movie will still play squarely at the low class jackasses and it will still be directed poorly (but expensively, Micheal Bay eat your heart out!) by Peter Berg. And it will still star Will Smith.
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song 'Two Steps Behind' one of their best, they play it acoustically really well live
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ahh i don't think will smith is a better or more versatile actor than the cruise... he's more charasmatic, but not a better actor. cruise may be a lunatic, but he is an excellent actor
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...And maybe (hopefully) Tropic Thunder are the only movies to watch in the theater this summer.
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We are a committed to the empowerment of urban youths 15 to 24 to make informed decisions regarding all of their entertainment needs. Beaks supports the free market ideal. Visit ocmcmagazine.vze.com or myspace.com/ocmc and let us know what you think.
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THink about that movie... it has every cliche, plus the whole Stallone as/is Arnold in the alternate universe.Hancock is a movie for the 4th of July (which is Friday) released wide on the 1st.,,, why? B/c the "opening weekend" is a week long. Because of that, you should see this in I=MAX.
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Now that is cool news!
BTW Last Action Hero rules
Got the soundtrack not long ago and it's awesome. -
So how about making a real, low budget indie film? Who cares if it makes $200 million or not? At this point, Will could get any script greenlit, especially if he waived his fee and the movie only cost $20-30 million.
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that was the only movie where he showed any real acting chops...ali??? for christ sakes, he was playing a real person...and doing a piss poor job at it...after 6 degrees, i thought he was gonna go the denzel route...but no, it was back to the fresh prince shucking and jiving shit for will...this couldve been a brilliant dark comedy...but instead we get shit...shit that will make money, but still shit...and sag aint gonna go on strike, so we are gonna get even more shit from hollywood....hooooofuckinray
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Ha -- looks like Michael and Rita got together after all. Although anybody who watched Season 3 of Arrested Development would probably be pretty creeped out seeing Jason Bateman and Charlize Theron as a married couple...
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Jul 01, 2008 4:24:23 AM CDT
Have People Read The Original Last Action Hero Script?
by troutmaskreplicant
Co-written by Zak Penn. It's around if you look for it. The shooting script was rewritten by two other writers including Shane Black.
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Jul 01, 2008 4:51:49 AM CDT
Hudson Hawk is may favorite guilty pleasure
by nomoredirtyjokespleaseweareyanks
its so quotable. Damn photomat assholes.
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but didn't feel like driving to the theater. Sounds like I saved $4 in gas.
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Uneven but fun. Berg is a fantastic director and does a great job with a sluggish script.
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He's a miserable SOB with a critical mind--something sorely lacking in the reviewers roster on AICN, where nostalgic fanboys run amuck and introduce reviews with five page remembrances of their fifth grade antics.
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Got to love that! I shall not see this movie as it looks suckish. I think ol Will Smiff needs some good screenplays. He's a likable guy and all but he ain't all that. The thing is, most people seem to like crappy movies, soooo that's what you get. I don't know how Tom Cruise got into all this but he's the cat's crap box. At his best, he looks like he's trying too hard. He will not be missed after the disasterous "Valkyrie" poop...
enuff -
Jul 01, 2008 6:21:52 AM CDT
How did Peter Berg become an action director
by calstatelongbeachfilmmaker1
Excuse Me, but how in the hell did Peter Berg become an action director. The guy directed one fucking film before The Rundown that was seen by no one and yet he gets these big action movies like The Kingdom and Hancock. How the hell does he do it? I mean nothing that this guy has done before remotely suggests that he is capable of handling these big action movies. I'm sorry directing a couple of Chicago Hope episodes don't fucking count. I mean seriously, how the fuck does he do it? Does he have pictures of heads of studio doing crazy shit. How the hell else do you explain this guy landing all these action assignments and never mind that this guy directs only the dialogue scenes of these big action set pieces. I mean any one with a brain knows that he doesn't do the action scenes, but he has a top second unit team do it for him. Just look at The Rundown, the majority of the movie was done by the fight choreographer. Fuck Berg, Long Live Michael Bay, at least he directs his own action and makes no pretense about anything else. But really, can anyone answer this question????????????
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Is a good driver. Ok..maybe not as good as Dustin Hoffman.
I have really stopped going to as many movies as I used to. I have gotten tired of seeing average stuff in the theater. No doubt I will rent Hancock, but I just can't get enthused enough to pay for it on the big screen.
Wall *E was worth it, however. AND Dark Knight is going to pack the Shiz....
Who's with me? -
Does "Hancock" give an exasperated "Ahhhh, hell nooooo" in the flick?
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Wall-E didn't come close to the greatness of The Incredables. It was just "OK".
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Berg, you just got served yo'!
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1. The push to make movies for almost everyone "four-quadrant consumption" (and at $200 million it's no wonder this mandate continues)
2. Lack of charecter development in favor of a ninety minute running time. Since half the audience the studios are courting have almost non-existent attention spans this is really a fait accompli.
3. Gotta lighten things up and have a "hollywood" ending. Musn't traumatize the kiddies. -
...Take it from me, marketing and P.R. people are the worst forms of subhuman, bloodsucking, backstabbing scumbags imaginable. Complete twofaced, gladhanding, bottom-feeders, every last one of them! So right off, you have a problem, because, if anything, Bateman should have been the villain.
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I didn't see the movie but it seems like an insightful bit o' writing.
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Guess how many previous talkbacks TroyG has participated in? That's right: 0.
TroyG, take your planty, whoring ass out of here. With any luck your studio pimpmaster will give your gimpy ass a Drano mouthwash for failing so utterly in talkback. -
I thought the Kingdom had some good moments but the ADD editing was hard to take, cutting every three seconds ... during a mellow conversation on an airplane, for instance.
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... was definitely as the clueless boxer in The Great White Hype ("I'm not even IRISH!")
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Good call. Worst plant ever?
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So none of his projects are getting any of my money. Now, fuck off.
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Definitely in the top five. What a tool.
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Jul 01, 2008 8:31:35 AM CDT
I don't agree that Will Smith is a more versitile actor than Tom
by thebigtexas
I don't DISAGREE, but you can't just say because Will Smith did "Ali" that he could surpass the variety that Cruise has put out. "Born on the 4th of July" and "Magnolia" come to mind for Cruise's films. Will Smith is on an equal plain, but he shouldn't be listed above.
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Is like comparing a punch in the nuts or an atomic wedgie as a preferred greeting. I count a grand total of 4-5 acting moves in their combined 35 years of moviemaking.
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it must be good. i'm sold!
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Glowing reviews for Hellboy 2, go big red!
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I'm going to the matinee, which is $6.50, which isn't difficult to afford and I have the time. So... if it's good that's great, if it's okay that's great, and it can't suck more than Ultra Violet which is just about the only movie where I wanted to walk out and ask for my money back.
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He's so pathetic and obvious.
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You're clearly far more entertained by listening to yourself than any movie. This is a great example of a review that says so much more about the reviewer than the film being reviewed. But really, you compared Smith to Cruise without even one direct reference to the fact that Will Smith actually now is a nutty $cientologist? If you really want to discourage people from paying money to see this, you should have really emphasized that fact.
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Jul 01, 2008 11:04:37 AM CDT
Nothing Smith has done approaches Born on 4th of July
by jackrabbitslim
Will's Ali was a fine piece of work - doesnt compare to Cruise's raw intensity of Born on 4th or even his misogynistic charisma he struts about in Magnolia. Does Hancock's "assholity" compare to Frank T.J. Mackey - I sincerely doubt it.
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Cuz i just (unknowingly) parroted Big Texas. I concur in every way.
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About Berg getting steamrolled by Sony. But I think its more of a William Smith Company thing. Recently he's been getting these up and coming directors for his blockbusters and turned them into studio hacks. While he comes off fine, they come off looking incompetent. I mean after Bad Boys 2 I wonder if a big name director will work with Smith on a blockbuster flick again? Bad Boys was too much ego from both ends. So Smith gets obviously compitent directors Francis Lawrence/Beg/Proyas and makes these very good looking movies ($$$) but they all aren't worth seeing more then once. I wonder if Smith was worried with after Sonnenfeld's WWW and MIB2 and Bad Boys, all of which were over indulgent crap that he was going to start to alienate audiences? So he took in directors that could be controlled a little more since they didn't have much weight? I would be interesting to see a series of interviews from these guys... like WAY after the fact. Because right now they are all WAY too busy counting the money The William Smith 100 million a year Company, earned them to ever take what they say as fact and not part of the contract. It would be nice to know how much by the balls studios or Smith had these directors or if they were all their own faults. Like they saw the $ amount that came with directing a Smith Joint and couldn't handle it.
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I don't know if this will good or bad, hoping at least fun. I love LAH as much as the others who have posted, soundtrack is kick ass. I think it was a combination of critics who didn't get it and just the craziness of the flick that doomed it in theaters. If you like comics and action movies and just want to have a good time you do want to see it.
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I want to like it, but the flagrant product placement makes me hate it before it is even 10 minutes in. ("Converse, late 20th century classics").
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I watched Magnolia recently and I gotta say - Cruise is a freak and a pretty unappealing one at that, but he is great in that part. It's weird how it kind of reminded me of that infamous recent Scientology video he did. Anyway he holds the screen fantastically in Magnolia. (I rewatched it cause of There Will Be Blood. It's still largely a failure, though it has some greatness to it at the same time.)
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My friend works for the Raleigh News and Observer and got me into a press screening. And that revelation aout Charlize is absolutely, completely WASTED in this film. Apparently, the two of them have been around since the beginning of time, evidenced in a scene where Charlize points out scars on Hancock and tells him, "Oh you got this one in 3 BC, oh this one's from a house fire in 1850". PLOT HOLES AHOY!: she claims that if they stay together for a while, they both become mortal, and that he has to leave. Uuh, you've been together since the dawn of mankind, you were in each other's prescence up until 1920, and you didn't become mortal then and die! Why is it now all of a sudden after spending a few weeks together that you're turning mortal?! Also, no one mentions anything about the implications of a black man and a white woman being supposedly married in 1850, no less walking down the street together in the SOUTH in AMERICA in nineteen fucking TWENTY!!!!!! Come ON now! They have one fight scene/domestic scuffle in downtown LA and then she never uses her damn powers again. The final fight scene is suprisingly brutal w/o showing much blood, but the manner in which the film is resolved is just bugfuck nuts. It's quite a mess of a film.
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COMPLETE AND UTTER AFTERTHOUGHT. What a waste.
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Here's a tip when reviewing a film:
FORGET EVERYTHING THAT YOU KNOW ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED BEHIND THE SCENES AND JUST TALK ABOUT THE DAMN MOVIE!
Seriously, your review had more bull crap attacks on Berg and Sony than it had anything to do with the actual film, Hancock.
Hancock works. It has problems and is far from a perfect film, but it's fun, it's surprising, it's funny, and there's tons of eye candy.
When you say there's no 'conflict' it shows how little you truly know about movies: This movie is NOTHING but conflict - from Hancock's personal conflict, to the conflict with the city & police, to his conflict with criminals and eventually Charlize.
Plus, you've got the consistent conflict that Bateman's character goes through with his job, his family, with Hancock, and coming to deal with where the ultimate resolution takes us.
Take the movie for what it is, not what you wish it would have been if someone hadn't 'tried to make it safe.' Because as it stands, Hancock's a helluva lot of fun. -
Gotta want something for conflict to exist. What does Hancock want (until his run-in w/ Mary)? To be left alone? To keep drinking? Not strong enough. Ray's predicament is a little more involving, but the stakes are too low because there's no reason to believe that Mary will leave him (or that he'd have to sell the house or whatever). It's nice that the film was *trying* to be different, but, regardless of what I know about the behind-the-scenes squabbling, you can sense from this cut that it wanted to play rougher. Hence "go-nowhere compromises".
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Not I.
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Brad Pitt is terrible
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Not even remotely. Much more conventional than that.
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that's some good wordage!
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If anything, it's a study of how to wreck the momentum of a film by introducing a potentially interesting angle only to do NOTHING with it. Plus, Theron is really, REALLY bad in this. I don't know if it was her or Berg, but it was painfully obvious throughout the film that she was connected in some way to Hancock. Watch the clip of the three of them at the restaurant as Hancock talks about his origins and watch Theron's face. It's so PAINFULLY obvious. She's beating us over the head with it, for Pete's sake. There's no subtlety, no nuance to her performance. And another BIGASS plot hole: in the end fight, as Hancock gets his ass kicked, Theron writhes in pain, indicating that she and Hancock are symbiotically connected a la ET and Elliot. Now, if she can feel it as he gets his ass kicked in the finale, does she feel what he feels all of the time? Don't you think her husband would have, at some point prior to Hancock's arrival in their lives, noticed his wife rolling around on the floor of their house like someone was kicking her ass? When Hancock gets drunk, does she feel a hangover, too?
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How Theron suddenly packs on two tons of black eyeliner once her powers are revealed. I couldn't stop laughing at that.
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Hancock himself was supposed to be a metaphor for America...as in, barreling into everything supposedly in the name of doing good, but instead just pissing people off, causing even more damage, etc, etc. Interesting take, though I doubt such was intended. And no, I'm not gonna see it...though I do likes me some Charlize!
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...seeing as how they stole the whole story from me and my artwork.
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I went into that film a Bruce Willis convert (after Moonlighting and Die Hard, how could I not be?) and walked out thinking Bruce had taken one too many hits to the head. Swing on a Star is one of the dumbest songs ever written, and having he and Aiello sing that was just fucking painful.
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NEWSFLASH: Most of us do not live in L.A. or work in some capacity in the movie industry. Thus, we do not know what you're talking about when you say things like "'cuz Little Mann just got steamrolled by Sony". Almost every contributer to this site always puts in these little gossip nuggets as if he's talking in a L.A. coffee shop with one of his aspiring screenwriter buddies.
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We live in a world wherein someone has dubbed Will Smith as the biggest male actor in Hollywood.
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and it was crap, too.
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Jul 01, 2008 8:14:00 PM CDT
Just saw it......I thought this was supposed to be a comedy.
by shermdawg
The worst marketed film EVER.
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The WHOLE movie is about what Hancock wants: to figure out how to fit into a world where he doesn't, where he can't. He wants to belong and he wants to know the reasons why he doesn't. And this conflict, as well as others, are resolved.
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FYI. Or at least, the closest thing we've ever seen.
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1. Superman II (Donner Cut)
2. Spider-Man II
3. Superman Returns
4. Batman Begins
5. Iron Man -
I really want an answer to this BIGASS plot hole: in the end fight, as Hancock gets his ass kicked, Theron writhes in pain, indicating that she and Hancock are symbiotically connected a la ET and Elliot. Now, if she can feel it as he gets his ass kicked in the finale, does she feel what he feels all of the time? Don't you think her husband would have, at some point prior to Hancock's arrival in their lives, noticed his wife rolling around on the floor of their house like someone was kicking her ass? When Hancock gets drunk, does she feel a hangover, too?
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Happens whenever they are "connected"(basically when they are near each other for an extended period of time). Not THAT bad, for all the ranting, I gotta say its a decent movie. Maybe the closest thing to a real superhero spoof movie(unbreakable is more of a full tribute). It has a few good things running for it though. A theme for one, there was a snippet of it at the end of the "its not sexual in any way" scene.
The major point most people like to miss is that the guy never really gave a crap because for every one person grateful for his help, there were 20-30 screaming at him asking why didn't he do a better job or making a comment about his appearance. Basically, why try to care when the next time you save someone you'll have to do it again, repeating the same thing over and over again. This guy has been at it for how many years(keep it somewhat spoiler free guys)? Somewhere along the way he stopped caring. -
I thought that was a good movie and very rewatchable.
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It's another Will Smith movie. He's a kick ass dude who doesn't care about anything. He decides to reform and become a good guy. Along the way he will have have help from some kids and a really hot chick how probably runs something like a half way for kids. So he gets his act together and then has the fight of his live. Just when you think he's down for the count, his connection with the kids and the hot chick will give him the inspiration to go on and defeat the bad guys. There, I just saved you $12 bucks.
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But I might.Of course, I might not.
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For a thrown together superhero mythos, this kinda worked. Not brilliantly, but like Unbreakable it did work fairly well. Most of the hero mythos stayed fairly consistant internally. I did think the best character in the film was Jason Bateman, a good guy trying to sell being good to a bunch of selfish people. Making the sale to the most selfish guy in town, Hancock, really makes him the hero of the story. I do find Charlize Theron's character to be completely unbelievable in how she treats both of her men. I cannot imagine how to explain how she could justify the lies and mistreatment of both of them. All in all it was a halfway decent film, not truly brilliant, but I could justify seeing it again on cable (not paying for another viewing).
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I think the criticism of the movie is a little over the top. I don't even like Will Smith all that much and I found the movie a passable, didn't suck time waster. Certainly better than Spiderman 3.
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LOL
http://digg.com/movies/AOL_Bot_Vs_Hancock_Epic_Fail -
How many forms did you have to fill out to get permission to use the f-word in a marketing project like this talkback? Or was it merely sufficient to let Satan fondle your soul a bit longer than previously agreed upon?
Seriously, a lot better marketing whore-plants than you have charged these walls only to break on our shields. Your effort was one of the weakest I've ever seen. Time and again, as we've hurled your broken, latte-stained corpses from the parapets, we've given you very clear directions on what you did wrong and how to improve.
Improvement, alas, never happens.
You know why? It's because you think you're smarter than we are because you're on the inside and have better paying jobs than most of us. However, the truth is that you are, to a man, complete and utter cretins with absolutely zero competence and understanding of your target group.
I am now appealing directly to TroyG's employers:
Stop paying these morons to do sub-standard and useless work. They don't sound like us, they don't understand us, and they can't sell us shit. They are wasting your time and your money. What you need to do is go native. Hire one of us to do the marketing. Hell, hire ME. I'd do a hell of a better job than your boy TroyG here, and probably a lot cheaper, too. Look me up in the Zone and we'll talk.
Cheers.
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My CV can be found at: www.noshamewhore.com I work cheap and have an outstanding AICN pedigree. I couldn't do a worse job
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Hell, as much as I brought up shit like Smallville over the years, I might as well been a plant.
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A teary-eyed philbrick runs intohis bosses office. "Sir, it's just too awful" "Calm down, philbrick, what's wrong?" "It's the TB'ers again, sir" "AGAIN, PHILBRICK, WHATTSAMATTER NOW" "they think they can do my job sir, and do it better" "They have a point, Philbrick, but you make a better coffee, and your father is a major shareholder, so you've got a job for life"
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Nice.
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my oldest kid really wants to go see this and wants me to take him. Maybe I can talk him out of it...
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till ya know 100% that he brainwashes the kids.
Until then, if your really unsure, aim to see it as a matinee. Best four bucks spent on a premier. Too bad they shamelessly rip on the Tick at the end though. -
Nothing says quality entertainment than a seedy version of Superman throwing whales into boats.
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FUCK! How jaded can you fucks be? Just got back from seeing this in the Yoo-Kay (everybody say Yoo-KAY - thank Kanye for dat) and thoroughly enjoyed it. Yes, the Charlize thing was a bit obvious, the whole motivation for Will to change only worked because of Big Willy giving it his all, and yes it sucked that Move Bitch didn't have Bitch in it, only to have Will saying Shit and Asshole every few second no less than ten minutes in. It's a great superhero comedy - that's, at its heart, what this is - and the character stuff works because they were smart enough to get a damn good cast in on this. It'd be a lot of fun to see a sequel to it - Hancock curbing anger issues? - and there's a nicely underplayed backstory / mythology going on that could easily be expanded a la the Kryptoninan villains from the Phantom Zone stylee. But basically the first half is if Marcus Burnett from BAD BOYS were a superhero, and drunk, and the second half plays like an elongated family argument from the FANTASTIC FOUR. The ending works for the most part (better than that pitiful Iron Monger section of the otherwise flawless IRON MAN) and Will, as ever, entertains the fuck out of us all. We get heavily made up Charlize as a superhero goddess (PLEASE cast this woman as Wonder Woman!) and everyone gets pleasant dreams tonight. Even Mrs-Spud-To-Be fancied the Theron in this movie, and she's always up for a shot of that Big Willy ass. Something for everyone, kiddies, something for everyone.
It pisses on SPIDER-MAN 3, that is for fuckin' sure.
GreatCzarsGhost - You called it, every word. Doesn't mean it isn't a damn entertaining movie tho. -
Sorry for the spoilers in that last post. Pretty poor netiquette on my part - can't believe I just threw that up there. Sorry.
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far better than what this review leads you to believe.
The CGI was actually a lot better than I thought it would be and the ending worked for me.
I guess to each their own, but I'd definitely see a sequel to this. Although, to be fair, I haven't seen a Will Smith movie that wasn't at least entertaining, if nothing else. -
All of your comments about me just go to show how ignorant you must be about what you're talking about. Just because someone has a different opinion than you and your cohorts, doesn't mean that that individual naturally works for the industry. Where is the logic in that thinking? By that thought process, everyone on this talkback that shows some what of an interest in this movie is then employed by the company that made "Hancock." Does that truly make sense to you? Are you that paranoid that by me leaving one minor semi-positive comment here that it's going to somehow sway you and those around you that hate this movie to suddenly wake up one morning loving this flick and want to go out and buy the 4 -disc Special Edition Blu-Ray when it comes out? Are you afraid that you'll find yourself persuaded into going to see "Hancock" 10 times in the theater, quote your favorite lines to your friends, and then for Halloween dress like Will Smith to impress your friends at how awesome you are? If you think that I have that much pull and influence you are mistaken. I don't have any more influence over what people think and feel about the movie that they wanna see than you do. So why would a movie company wanna pay me to leave a semi-positive review? You just don't make any sense. I decide to leave my first talkback ever, and I'm introduced to the likes of people like you...judgemently, paranoid individuals that don't have anything better to do than to point the finger at me and claim something that they know nothing about. I initially leave one innocent comment and I get treated like a witch during the Salem Witch trials. You wanna burn anyone that differs in their thought than you. So you accuse me of working for the Company that made "Hancock" because I enjoyed watching the film, well again, using your thought process, since you hate the movie...you must work for some other film company that wants to make sure that "Hancock" fails and no one goes and sees it. Again, your logic fails and falls a bit short of making any sense. Here's a word of advice, and this is my last on the subject because I'm done dealing with you...leave your opinions exclusively to the films that you're discussing and to the films alone, because to stray from that, it just goes to show how ignorant you really are. And by the way, the film industry didn't pay me a dime to say that to you!
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...that defense has been trotted out time and again. Show me one single instance in any of the Hancock talkbacks where I've gone after people who give it positive feedback. As you well know, but are hoping others don't, this has NOTHING to do with your opinions and EVERYTHING to do with delivery, language and timing. It's all about triangulation. On their own, each of those things don't add up to much: there are n00bs who come in here all the time, there are people who speak in a way foreign to Geek Nation, and there are people who chime in on review talkbacks.
However.
A n00b who not only DOESN'T speak geek or merely speaks an archaic version of it, who also hits the right marketing cues, and only posts in a review TB has been shown, without exception, to be a plant.
See? With your "you treat me like shit on my first visit, *sniff!*" schtick you are already preparing us for the fact that we'll NEVER see you again.
You may want to check out the AvP:Requiem talkbacks for examples of previous kills and also lessons in how to proceed with more success next time around. The AvP:R talkbacks are littered with fucks who claimed to be long-time fans of both AICN and Aliens, who mysteriously only posted in those talkbacks and were never heard from again, despite promising that they would become fixtures.
You're not fooling anybody, son. Class dismissed. Now fuck off. -
"the industry". No-one outside of creative industries uses that term. I used to do it in the music industry. Give it up foilage.
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what a joke! Someone just photoshoped his pictures to some hot ones and then uploaded them to the online service 【wealthybeauty.com】.. you know the site is a rich men seeking hotties site.. so he is looking for a hottie there!
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You truly are. Nothing I said was "Schtick," or "triangulation" or what ever shit you're pulling out of you ass to make yourself appear superior and all knowing. You think that you have me pegged. "Oh, I got that guy...he ain't one of us. I'm so smart, he's so stupid." I guess you just don't want anyone else to play on your playground. Is that it? I feel sorry for you. Now, you go run off by the monkey bars and go fuck yourself! The End!
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You ARE stupid.
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