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Dwight Schrute vs. Decepticons?
Ahoy, squirts! Quint here. Looks like Rainn Wilson dropped a bit of a bomb over at MTV.com, saying he'll have a bit part in TRANSFORMERS 2. He says he'll play a professor, which would make sense since we know Sam Witwicky is college-bound in this one.
I know there's a big fan outrage against the first movie, which wasn't without its faults, but I think TRANSFORMERS 2 could be a rare sequel that outdoes the original. Bay knows action and if he allows the autobots and decepticons to have a bit more interaction with each other in this one, I think that could make all the difference. I want to see Starscream be a little sneaky shithead, really. That's pretty much it. The little moments at the end of the first movie between Starscream and Megatron were my favorites of the movie.
Alright, off to bed. I have to up and out in 6 hours... off to Romania for an interesting little visit. If the Vampires don't get me, I'll be checking in when I can.
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Dwight will not fit in this!
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how'd you get the sweetest job in the world?
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Terminator 2, X-Men 2, Spiderman 2, Godfather Part II, Star Trek II : The Wrath Of Khan, Batman Returns, Superman II, Blade 2, The Empire Strikes Back...anyone got anymore?
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There were some pretty horrible movies to come out last year and this year, so why all the hate towards "Transformers?" Could you have asked for a better adaptation of a CARTOON?
It was funny and entertaining. Don't give me the "flames on Optimus" as the source of outrage. That's just jackassed. -
Who the hell cares who's in it. Just let the robots battle it out. For two hours straight.
And Bay, how about a couple goddamn wide shots this time so we're able to follow the action. -
Aliens, The Bourne Supremacy, The Road Warrior, Evil Dead II.
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"Aliens" improved on the source material, as the second Next Generation film, "First Contact" was much better than "Generations." The new "Incredible Hulk" will be better than "Hulk" for sure, and "Rambo: First Blood, Part II" was a more entertaining film than "First Blood." I might be in the minority in thinking that "Superman II" wasn't very good, especially compared to the first. But, that's just me.
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Probably the best Toy Line - Cartoon - Film franchises in existence, most things go the other way round :p
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"Passion of the Christ 2: Revenge of the Christ" was pretty good, as well. More action, less mushy "bitch-talk."
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Would say Aliens...nah I'm a sucker for Ridley Scott's horror story than James Cameron's War movie...not that Aliens is bad, it's really good...but it's not as good as Alien. First Blood Part II...I'll give you that....Superman II was faster and had decent villains in it compared to the original, and it's much more entertaining.
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Shouldn't count as a sequel...ever...it's the same film with better effects and dialogue
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He knows hot to cut it so tight on editing it should have warnings for epilectics. The action in Transformers sucked. Quick edits, no one knew who was winning or what was going on.
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As utterly appalling as TRANSFORMERS was LaBeouf grounded it, committed to it and made that garbage work.
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He knows STYLE. If he knew action I'd have clear knowledge of what exactly happened, who was fighting against who, who was winning, etc. in the last half hour of his version of Transformers.
The man is 100% style and 0% clarity. -
The Bourne Supremecy and Road Warrior...though it's been a long time since I watched the Mad Max series...must hunt that out on DVD. Passion of the Christ 2: Revenge of the Christ...no comment...But Good Will Hunting 2: Hunting Season should get a mention "Apple Sauce, Bitch"
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was better than most expected. I think Bay can really knock it out the park with the second, though I hope he doesn't flood us with bots. Then again robots kickin ass and blowin shit up? I'm there!!
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He knows how to spend money that's for god damn sure. But his set pieces are a hogdgepodge of quick cut editing and shaky cam. It's take a lot more skill as a director to actually choreograph it deliberately and shoot it in wides to actually let the audience see what is going on. Not only that but he throws frustrating jingoistic bullshit in inexplicably and arbitrary slow mo's. For instance the slow mo shot of the woman screaming in Transformers is unintentionally hilarious and a terrible shot amidst the action to boost.
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If being satisfied with a lightweight movie adaptation of a franchise because it once encompassed a lightweight cartoon works for you, then great. But Transformers is more than that. I used to read the comics, which was initially written by the writers of the brilliant toy character blurbs, and the comics utilised and expanded on this, going where the show would not, making the Transformers flawed and likeable, and coming up with many classic pieces of drama. Ditto the animated movie, which, while no doubt honouring the tv show feel and characters, was pretty damned inventive and fun. It even has Greek myth and biblical reference for christ sake. That's what Transformers means to me. The show, while fun, was terrible. Bay's movie, being rendered incomprehensibly ugly, stupid and useless by Bay's 'techinque', wasn't even fun. There should never be excuses for a bad movie.
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...will have a whole new meaning :D
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"Shut up H8ORZ! It's based on a stupid cartoon anyways, it had giant robots blowing stuff up and that's all that matters! BLARGH!!" begins right.....now. Bonus points if they are responding to a reasonable substantive argument in the opposition.
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He needs to go back to doing Playboy shoots and snorting coke off his Porsche Spider,not pretending to be one of the best film makers out there...becuase the reality is that guys a DIMESTORE JAMES CAMERON.
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Toy Story 2, A better tomorrow 2, Star Trek II, The Godfather Part II, Aliens, Terminator 2, Scream 2, The Empire Strikes Back, Superman II, Aliens, Clerks 2,
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"The Beef" was the best thing in Transformers.
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The movie was not good and the second won't be either. Are fuck cameo roles expected to save this terrible franchise in bloom? Michael Bay blows and always has. His movies are emptiness couched in effects. Bay knows action? Erroneous. Bay has an eye for visual effects, yet often falls short of that special something that would have made an effect perfect. Add to that his amazing ability to make dialogue sound cliched and crap and you have a recipe for disaster every time.
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some of you flame everything just because you jump on the band wagon to be different, transformers was exactly like the cartoon, fun full of action and characters that were saturday morning.....what else were you expecting?sthe beef to become a method actor and during pre prodcution he got to work for 6 months with advanced robotics to know ho they feel and think.....you flamers need a reality check this film aint supposed to be anything more than a fun film with robots kicking ass....the beef held his own in that sh*t stop flaming.
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you fucking people are aware, arent you, that the whole transformers, autobots and whatever other shit they fed you as kids, were just half hour commercials....right??? jay ward pisses on all of you
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That's fucking hilarious.
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The Lester movie wasn't as well made as Donner's first movie, but it was more dramatic, exciting and poignant.
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the movie sucked. Awful. cheesy. terrible. the second half of superman 1 which wasn't good, expanded and made worse.
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need i fuckin say more?? this week we said goodbye to a giant of a director...but when bay and ratner kick off, fuck it, im gonna party...i just hope they go before me...i wanna dance on their fucking graves....me and uwe boll
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I agree with you on all but Clerks 2, Terminator 2 and Scream 2, where I thought the originals were better. I'd also like to add X Men 2 and Spiderman 2 into the mix. Fingers crossed we'll be saying the same thing about The Dark Knight in a few months time.
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look...i was a teen when the movie came out...so i shoulda been the target audience...but when they made luthor a wig wearing wierdo with a real estate fetish, i almost puked...and forget supes 2....but you guys have your fun...i hated those movies
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in Professor Schrute's Jell-O mold.
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But he never met it.
The guy can´t make a good action sequence. -
as in To excrete or discharge waste like a bowel movement. I mean we had the clever Bay have a transformer PEE defocation would definitely be bigger and badder.
also, let's not only have 1 fat man eat lots of donuts lets have 3 and have em all wear spandex but give one of them a thong for a quick laugh.
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Christmas Vacation, Bad Boys 2, Army of Darkness (maybe?), The Silence of the Lambs (Technically it is a sequel, though I think Manhunter is better), The Bourne Ultimatum, Attack of the Clones (still shit but better than the previous), Once upon a Time in China 2, The Barbarian Invasions,
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I don't know how people were able to sit through the first one. It was incredibly boring, especially during the action sequence at the end. I just.... didn't care. The little kid in front of my row wasn't into it either, so he kept saying hi.
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No, he fucking doesn't!
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If the former, hooray, if that latter, yeah, the show is kinda funny in a dumbed down way.
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Ahhhh memories
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I wanted to like this movie... but Megan Fox as some former convict and the shitty ass scenes with the FBI agents holding Fox.... remember how that one dude was saying how hot it was that she was a convict? Ugh, so campy... that and the jerky camera work! ZOOM OUT, ZOOM OUT BAY!
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...had it's few moments of greatness, but was mostly dog shit. I've read Transformers comics with more depth. And fuck off with the 'it's based on a cartoon' argument. Anybody coming out with that shit needs to do their research on the things they are knocking so they know what the fuck they are on about. Cunts.
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I liked it for what it was, but its a pretty crap movie. Cool efx, though, and most of the big action set-pieces scenes were decent. Could have done without the half hour long yard gag and sector 7, though.
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Don't care about what the source material was, because at the end of the day you have to attract viewers. Are you spending that much money to attract a small troop of geeks? I know it did well, but that is the hype machine. Nobody else really cares. So, this movie was essentially ID4 with robots nobody had ever heard of. Who cares if the geeks like it? Not the studio. What matters is the bottom line and we all know what that is. The nerd audience may have its sway on the interweb, but mostly it is the inconsequential rantings of people like you and me. People with a bit of time to do exactly this and actually care. The rest of the world is indifferent.
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Just like Pearl Harbor! The man has never made a fully enjoyable movie and transformers was no different. It is sad when a cartoon outdoes you in dialog and plot. I believe people went to that movie to see actual transformers not a lame kid and his unfunny parents. That movie was truly terrible. Bay is pathetic and so is everyone that defends him.
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Until Bay puts the original designs back and stops using the stupid scrap metal look it will always be shit. Couple that with Bay's inability to distinguish between ideas and explosions and this one will be equally brain dead and creatively bankrupt.
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a piece of shit like Transformers is embraced but not Prince Caspian.
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Well, I actually don't know how ridiculous it will be, but I'm sure it will be a complete terror on your wallet. You pay = You lose. This movie will be terrible. The first was so bad I could barely stand it and I'm sure the second will be worse. As many have already talked about, when are sequels better than the first? Certainly not her, because Bay is the most ridiculous movie maker in the world and I often wonder how he hasn't descended to Boll type levels. No matter what you think, this will be terrible.
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people, by and large, are done with christian-themed propaganda er enterainment.
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Shiny MegaPoo!
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Damn You Michael Bay
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what was unclear about transformers?.....'bots are searching for the cube......cube is hidden on earth....item linking cube is found...autobots protect the bearer of item...Decepticons want item.....They movie seemed fairly straightforward to me....course i didnt go in expecting anything more than i got....2 hours entertainment on a summer day.....wasnt a bad way to spend $5....
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exactly that kind of mentality that makes movies shit. 5 dollars??? where did you go see this?? rental? fine. get it. it is an obvious rental. this movie stunk. i hope that the second will be good, but why would you have hope with the same team going to work?
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He was always one of my favorite Decepticons.
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WHAT little moments? You mean the half second where they look at each other when Megs woke up? The only way this movie will work for the real fans and not just for the "OOOH SHINY BOOM STUFF" crowds will be if Bay and his cronies actually research what the 'bots were like in any of the previous incarnations and stick with that instead of more crap with humans killing more decepticons than Ironhide did.
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The Decepticons don't stand a chance.
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it would always suck, just like the first movie. better to let it alone.
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apparently, nobody. so go to bed knowing you are right.
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all this talk about juno's dialogue being "too hip" or whatever, makes me wonder if the writer used to write for dawson's creek since that show was accused of the same stuff. or maybe this girl is related to kevin williamson or maybe its him with a sex change...who knows.
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..better not be in this one. Cant believe noone mentioned them. The one sequence where Optimus transforms in front of no nipple girl and young indiana jones was cool..got to give you this one Michael...ohhh and somebody better tell shia what "curse" lies on the actors that play young indie...hmmm .
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nobody with any amount of respectable intelligence can defend the garbage that was transformers last summer. It was one of the THE WORST movies to ever come out of hollywood. The dialogue was the worst mush mouthed crap I have ever heard. The action was just chaos with jerky camera movements. The 80's cartoon is oscar worthy compared to that abortion.
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Bad Boys 2? How is this going to be any different? And I guess he is not too conserned with this being any more serious by casting casting one of the one note wonders frome the office.
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You want to know what a good cartoon show to movie apatation is? Watch Speed Racer.
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a typical fight between Starscream & Megatron is not worth it.These are just human version episodes. Too much humans!!!! Go fight on Cybertron, you already show'd it to us!
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Whats with the 25 years of Tom Cruise link on this site? Is that a real thing? What is he retiring? Also after watching that clip of his works.... why hasn't he done a movie with Micheal Bay? They are perfect for each other. I am not saying that in a bad way, their styles match up pretty well.
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My hate is reserved for Bumblebee pissing on a guy, the masturbation conversation, Jazz breakdancing, virtually no attempt to make any Transformer a character... Despite what anyone says about "it's a cartoon", there's potential for a TF movie with a good story. If we can over analyze every superhero movie and lament that it's not dark or serious enough, I see no reason why TF has to be written off as nothing more than silly and fun. Do I want a humorless film? No. I'd just like an attempt to take what is good out of the source material, instead of making a film without any respect towards the original source. Once the TF's started beating on each other? That was good.
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fact
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So terrible, is the fact that the cartoon movie is so good. The cartoon movie is amazing. The music is probably one of my top five soundtraks (WEIRD AL!). Like when they rereleased the G.I. Joe movie and the Transformers on VHS back in the late 90's I bought them both. And the G.I. Joe movie was pretty bad when compared to the Transformers movie. SOOO maybe we'll have a good G.I. Joe live action film!... probably not especially since they'll probably be using real guns not lasars.
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Proof that pert titties are alive and well.
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it's not over analyzation, it's watching something handled in a poor way. i agree with you, there is room to make this a good thing and i hope that it ends up that way, but, let's think about whose handling the material. so, now we know it will be crap.
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...TOTAL FUCKING DESTRUCTION !!!
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No. No he doesn't. That's the problem with Michael Bay. He has no clue how to shoot action. He just sets up a bunch of cameras and then randomly picks them for his one hundred shots a second action sequence. That's why I never understood the, it's just dumb fun argument, because it might be dumb but it sure as hell isn't fun. It's just annoying. Instead of filming something exciting, Bay tries to trick the audience into thinking his films are exciting.
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LAME fucking Autobot dialogue ("What up bitches?"....what the fuck is that shit?) TERRIBLE 'bot designs (nothing but piles of pipes and sharp pointy ends. Nice fucking lips Optimus) and a SHITTY LAME TERRIBLE end that SHOULD have been an awesome toe to toe between Optimus and Megatron, not Prime getting bitch slapped only to be saved by a fucking kid. SO FUCK the sequel, and FUCK Bay. He's a hack and anything he touches turns to shit.
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May 28, 2008 7:54:34 AM CDT
All I know is after Transformers, I forgave Michael Bay for Arma
by beefywhore
It'll take a lot for me to let Pearl Harbor go...
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And the prime demo for Transformers, those who lapped it up, are people who use the term "I seen that movie".
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The Starscream-Megatron relationship was totally fan service and probably the best part of the movie.
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like Dan Brown knows flowing artful prose. In fact, there are some comparisons between Bay and Brown to be mnade. Both use style over substance. Both bend the laws of physics and science to their own narraticve wishes (not really a bad thing sometimes, but it si a similarity). And both tend to use tired and cliched plot points and resolutions.
I am certain Transformers 2 will be better than the first (and I kinda liked the first one due to having very low expectations of the movie that were surpassed). Because, we all know that Bad Boys 2 was such a cinematice achievement over the original (I realld hope my sarcasm is noiced here. I am new to posting on boards). -
Fucking proofreading!!!! Remember it, Muffintop!
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Simplifying the whole Narnia thing as "Christian themed propaganda" really shows some limited thinking there. I guess we'll see if you're right when "The Hobbit" comes out - or didn't you realize that this was a Christian metaphor as well?
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And it was called Bad Boys and the Rock. He has since parted ways with action and substituted it with lots of money.
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Name ONE "good" movie that this man has made. I dare you.
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The Rock and Bad Boys. Say what you want but those movies are good. I've gone back and watch Armagedon again now that I am not 12 and yeah its terrible, but the Rock and Bad Boys hold up.
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$5= matinee prices all seats before 4.......during the winter months that is 1 show only-first show is usually 330......I never go to evening shows, to many people,loud kids,adults with cellphones(WORST invention EVER) generally a bad movies experience....
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what the hell are you looking for in a movie that you complain about a film like transformers?......the movie delivered what it was supposed to.....2 hrs of summer entertainment, nothing more
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i think there were a lot more satisfied fans then outraged fans? statements like that encouage "phantom" hate... you know where people with simple minds are easily swayed to make an opinion on something based on what they hear others saying... like most liberals and the news
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If I want "summer entertainment", I'll go to a Six Flags and ride some coasters. When I walk into a MOVIE I expect at least a modicum of fucking QUALITY, not excuses by a bunch of limp wrists who eat shit up on a regular basis and exclaim "what do you expect, steak?".
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No matter how much "fan outrage" these Transformers films garner, fans will still go to see them. So it doesn't matter. The Star Wars prequels were viewed multiple times by "haters" and this is being repeated with the new Indiana Jones. They talk big on the Internet, but in reality they own Transformers on DVD and will be in line for the sequel on opening day.
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couldn't tell the difference between the Autobots and Decepticons in Bay's film. They were all different shapes, sizes, and colors. I think it was obvious who was who when Optimus was fighting Megatron, or when Jazz was fighting anybody. I also love how you chuckleheads think that Jon Voight turned into an action here because he fired a shotgun a couple of times. What would you do, cower in fear like a little bitch? Probably. Just shut the fuck up. Seriously. Shut your fucking traps, you whiny little fanboy bitches. I hope Bay makes Soundwave into an iPod Nano in the next film, simply to piss off you useless fucks.
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May 28, 2008 8:35:14 AM CDT
Dwight's one line of dialogue as a college Prof is this:
by phil connors
"Go go go go go go go!!"
Vintage Michael Bay exposition. -
my point being....going into these films looking for a masterpiece is setting yourself up for disapointment....i am in the camp who liked Daredevil/FF/Transformers- better than NOT getting a film (and I'd like to see sequels)...and pretty much delivered what I expected to see on the screen...
They are "Summer" films,I didnt go in expecting to see Oscar worthy filmmaking -
Goddamn. Howsabout an edit function? It's not like it would be difficult to add.
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Whiny little bitches.
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I grew up watching the cartoon and for the life of me I don't get why people think it has depth and nuance because it doesn't and it never did. The film was goofy fun with some great FX work. People take this franchise way too seriously.
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If by that you mean it was a huge pile of shit then I most hardily agree. The art of movie making doesn't need another fucking Transfomers movie... come on.
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Is like settling on the first chick you have sex with. How about making a stand for quality? Instead of lapping up the shit you get shoveled and moaning like Droopy Dog "I'm happy they gave me anything at alll". I'd rather they never make the film than be handed a piece of middle of the road, and lower, shit. It doesn't have to be Oscar-worthy, but then again why CAN'T it be? Simply because it has robots doesn't mean it has to be disposable shit. And fuck you seagrass you silly twat, Darwin is coming for you.
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the sector 7 shit was retarded, couldnt even be taken seriously since they were trying to throw in the lame one liner jokes..i really hope the get rid of that ..Why does every fucking character have to try to be funny?
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They clearly admitted they couldnt show the transformers enough cause they didnt have enough money for the fx.this time, there shouldnt be an excuse since it obviously made $.
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it was pretty much a glorified toy commercial. The episodes that took place after the animated movie were really the only ones that hold up nowadays. The funny thing is, the comic book series for both Transformers and GI Joe took the franchises very seriously. Hell, issue two of GI Joe had a dead guy blow up himself and another guy with a grenade! People hardly ever mention the influence of the comics. I saw more of the comic in Bay's film than I did of the cartoon. People actually *died* in Bay's film! I looked forward to my monthly issues of both series much more than I looked forward to any episode of their respective TV series. The only thing that was really memorable about the TF cartoon was the voice acting, which was note-perfect.
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Have you not seen the Transformers cartoon movie? I don't think that its fan boys that make this movie huge, its dumb idiot frat boy types. Or just dumb guys. Go talk to your buddy that you consider to be the biggest sports fan you know. You know the guy that has no idea other channels outside of ESPN exsits, and you'll find out that he is a huge fan of Transformers.
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Touched a nerve, did I? I guess you are one of the "whiny little bitches", since you obviously took offense to what I said. Good. I hope the next Transformers movie makes your head explode like a Scanner victim.
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That film has aged incredibly poorly. The only cool aspects of the film are Prime's death and Star Sceam being blown away by Galvatron. It's grade A cheese all the way.
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He already beat the Dunder Mifflen online ordering system, and THAT was a sentient machine. It even stated that Dwight was the superior being. And in a pinch, who knows what a can of mace can do to a Decepticon? At the end of the day, it doesn't matter. Their just big toys. (Beets. Bears. Battlestar Galactica.)
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Exactly.
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The G.I. Joe comics were hardcore and pretty damn violent. Most people don't realize how nasty those original comics could actually get. The cartoon seems like an even bigger joke when comparing it to the comic because nobody even took a bullet...er..I mean a laser blast.
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I'm with the beet farmer. He has pepper spray and throwing stars. Question: Will he be driving his 85' Trans-Am in this one, considering the GM license? That car is so awesome.
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The closest he has come to a average movie is The Rock. Everything bad in that film comes from the direction.
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produce very thirsty babies.
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You mean the same movie that had the Wreck-Gar and his boys dancing to "Dare To Be Stupid"? Yeah, I thought that was lame even when I was a kid. Also, Judd Nelson made a crappy voice for Hot Rod. Also, I hate sports (except for soccer), was never in a frat, and I enjoyed Transformers, so your theory goes right out the window.
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your post simply illustrates that you are a garbage-gobbling sheep. Enjoy Britney's next album, next season's American Idol and Survivor and what ever else you get shoveled and eat up without questioning the ingredients.
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why sould they be oscar worthy? I DONT go into these films looking for great filmaking- I go looking to be entertained....i liked most of last yrs summer films...yeah a few things where a bit much (die hard 4s airplane bit) but for the most part i got what i was expecting and for me they where worth the $$ i paid to see them...
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conformists suck harder.
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I mean, Doc got shot in the FACE by SAW Viper's machine gun. Doc! The damn pacifist doctor! That actually upset me when I was a kid. No one ever really died in the Joe comics until that point except for Cobra minions.
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Jesus H. Christ, if you're entertained by shitty film making then my point is lost of you. Being "entertained" and "great film making" don't have to be mutually exclusive. If you are "entertained" by a shitty film, just think how much more you'd enjoy it if it were taken seriously and made with care? My POINT is that we don't have to, nor should we settle, on mediocrity just because of a film's release date.
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Bay is indefensible. Die Hard 4 was limp, but at least you could see what was happening. Bay tries to be Tony Scott and fails utterly. Bay is the worst action director of all time. The Three Amigo's has better filmed set-pieces than all of that fuck's filmography.
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Actually, I listen to groups like Boards of Canada, Kraftwerk, and Jazzanova, and I mainly watch Discovery Channel, History Channel and TCM. I earn a living in music and TV, and not mainstream music or TV, either. You have no idea what you are talking about.
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Music and TV ar not Cinema.
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May 28, 2008 9:20:40 AM CDT
Yes, entertaining and great films are not mutually
by nomoredirtyjokespleaseweareyanks
exclusive. For god's sake man, look at the eighties.
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Wow, you've really proven me wrong with your authoritative list of music taste and that you "make a living in music and TV". So does Uwe Boll...
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My point was simple......go into the flim looking to be enetertained and odds are you will be...go in looking to find fault and you will
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I have to disagree with almost everyone in this talkback. While I am not the biggest fan of Bay, I do think Bad Boys 2 does a very good job of staging the action and allowing the viewer to follow what is happening on screen. The first example is the rotating camera scene where the camera keeps spinning around both rooms showing the viewer exactly what was going on. Bay used this technique again for a brief sec in Transformers at the end with Jon Voight and Anthony Anderson. All of Bay's car chase scenes in Bad Boys 2 also uses plenty of wide angle shots. There is also the scene where there is a shoot out in the middle of an intersection where Bay shows all angles of the fight and who is where. So, I do think Bay "knows" action, but it only comes through when he really is having fun with no budget constraints. Don't forget about Starscreams fighter jet sequence at the end of Transformers. That was pretty awesome and well shot.
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than it got wrong. The only real missteps were: Bumblebee's piss break and Turturro's character, who was the only person *not* taking things seriously. Frenzy I could live with because he was a murdering bastard. Now, just for a moment, imagine if Spielberg had directed Transformers. After seeing the last Indiana Jones film, I really don't think he could have done better than Bay. I didn't hate KOTCS, by the way, just thought it was pretty average. I enjoyed Transformers more.
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Whatever man, enjoy what you enjoy. It seems the circle of life continues.
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...than Spielberg. Give me a fucking break. Spielberg AND Lucas fuck up KOTCS and that automatically makes Bay a better choice for TF? Spielberg has more talent in his wife's tits than Bay does in his entire coke-ridden body.
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but you guys bag on Raimi, Shymalan for miss-steps after masterpieces but Bay gets a free ride. He makes truly soulless cinema.
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i just never expected more out of the film, to me it delivered.....its the Transformers not The Usual Suspects.....
and i got what i expected to given the source material, the director and the actors... -
You really are an idiot. 3 items hardly makes an authoritative list, I agree, but what do you want? A dissertation on the fucking hurdy-gurdy and it's use in modern classical music? I picked 3 groups you probably have heard of, big deal. Ever heard of Gel-Sol? John Adams? Ken Andrews? Hum? The em:t label? Sonar Kollektiv? Do you know what the minimalist movement was about? Have you ever heard a prepared piano played live? Do you know anything at all?
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Boards of Canada are fucking ace. As are Plaid. However, I don't agree with your opinion on the film. I saw nothing of the comics in Bay's Transformers. The robots in the comics had depth and characterisation. Bay's take on the franchise had nether.
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than Spielberg. He's not even on the same level. Oh, and I could have sworn that Spielberg *wanted* Bay to direct Transformers. By your logic, that means that Spielberg doesn't know what he is doing, either. You give me a fucking break.
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I have problems with that movie, but critics and common people are loving it.
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he's a jew ya know.
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Is that you are defending a bloated piece of cinematic shit like you gave birth to it, while at the same time trying to seem like a person of taste, the two don't work well together. I simply called for people to stop accepting the shit they are given by fucking hacks and ask for something better.
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..I hear ya. I can't see why we can't have quality and enjoyment. It worked in the 80's.
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The Fuckin Eighties. My personal Golden Era of Hollywood. Rambo's, Marty Mcfly, Indy, Star Wars, Swarzenegger, John Hughes(When he was good), Eddie Murphy(When he was good), and many more!!!!!!!
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Indeed they are. Check out Caural or Secret Frequency Crew if you like those groups. Kinda like Prefuse, but not. You and I will just have to agree to disagree about Transformers. I recently re-read the entire Marvel run, and I really thought that Bay's film took the best elements of the comics and the animated series, but more so from the comics.
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His criteria for a director was that he wanted someone who can make a big, brash, expensive, technical, effects-heavy movie. And sadly, not much else. Bay can do that.
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Goonies, Ghoulies, Critters, Freddy movies, Die Hard, Mel Gibson(Mad Max 2 & 3, Lethal Weapon 1 & 2), and many many more......
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so what is "quality"? to you.....what was "wrong" with transformers and how do you fix it...
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I prefer the work of Miles Davis, Les McCann & Eddie Harris, Coltrane, Charlie Parker, Bill Withers, Beck, but then I'm not a music aficionado...
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Your logic is mind-blowing. Really, it is. I never said that Transformers was the end-all, be-all of cinema. I enjoyed the film. That's it. I just hate whiny little fanboy bitches who think they know everything.
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are you my dead grandad?
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I AM your dead grandad, and I can see everything you do. Stop touching yourself in the bathroom and no that dark spot on your back won't heal, you better see a doctor about it!
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Mainstream jazz. Wonderful musicians, but still pretty mainstream. All those guys put out some crap in their time, you know. If you had mentioned The Art Ensemble of Chicago or Can I would have been impressed. Beck's output has been uneven since Midnite Vultures, although bringing Matt Mahaffey from Self with him on tour was a nice move. I just remixed a Bill Withers track, actually.
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is coming from Japan. The Soil and Pimp Sessions, for example. Sleep Walker. Hajime Yoshizawa.
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The D.O.P. was on ritalin, urinating bumblebee(who talked through the radio), terrible exposition, Centrefold Hacker, That fat black asshole, subplots that go nowhwhere(the chicks criminal record and Shias subsequent snub) and the Autobot's in the backyard sequence. I'm too bored to type any more, but I got plenty.
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As I said, I'm not a huge "music guy", I enjoy much of what they've done. I'd like to see ONE artist that hasn't put out something that doesn't measure up to what they've done before.
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where'd you put your watch?
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You Suck. Transformers is the worst movie I've ever seen in my entire life. I know lots of people get all dramatic and say that stuff, but I really mean it.
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May 28, 2008 10:04:28 AM CDT
This one I think has something to do with aliens
by itto ogami loses daigoro
But not the chest bursting kind
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You KNOW! :)
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Thats one of the best ever. 28 Weeks Later (arguable). American Pie 2. Wow Im really digging here
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The criminal record subplot was resolved. Shia snubbed her, then heard her side of the story, and made sure her record was expunged. Did you actually *watch* the film?
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Sorry...I was inspired by the talkback title.
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at least it made me laugh, especially how that was 'resolved' hahahahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
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obviously the characters and their interactions to the plot are second to none. MICHEAL BAY FOR PRESIDENT.
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I don't need you or anybody else to define quality for me, thank you very much. I enjoyed Transformers for what it was and I will remind you that not everything needs to possess the artistic merit of There Will Be Blood or No Country for Old Men. There are different kinds of films and my expectations for those different genres are varied. I didn't walk into Indy 4 expecting the same experience I received from watching The Assassination of Jesse James.(Although in retrospect Indy is a hell of a lot more fun) Transformers is based on a cartoon that was in turn nothing more than a daily, 30 minute toy commercial. All I wanted to see was realistic-looking robots thrashing the crap out of each other, which is precisely what I got.
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Halloween 2009
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It was resolved. So, your argument is incorrect. Admit when you are wrong, it makes you a better man. There were a lot of things about Transformers that I didn't like, but that wasn't one of them. It also was barely a subplot, just background information about her character's family and her reason for acting the way she did.
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May 28, 2008 10:19:37 AM CDT
I guess you didn't get my use of 'resolved'
by nomoredirtyjokespleaseweareyanks
thats not resolution fucktard, it's the easiest way out of something that shouldn't have been there in the first place. It did nothing for her character, it was just thrown in like so much robot piss.
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It's "you're". You are. Not "your". That kind of shit is worth picking nits over, not barely-there subplots in action movies. Do you add an extra 's' to disappointed as well?
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bayloverrrrrrrrr.
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I hate to say this, but it gave her character a little bit of depth. Few of the characters in Transformers had a lot of depth, but at least you know why she did what she did. It was background information about her character. Again, you are incorrect. Why shouldn't it have been there in the first place?
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May 28, 2008 10:26:48 AM CDT
Where Hollywood is missing easy "better sequel" opportunities...
by cletus van damme
Ishtar 2Gigli 2Breakin' 4: Whatchoo Still Breakin' Fo'?Monster Squad 2: Mummy's Got Nards, But They're Different SomehowThe English Patient II: Total RecoveryApollo 14Forrest Gump 2: Retard Strength
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The Rock and Transformers. Everything else is crap (although the violence in Bad Boys 2 was pretty entertaining). You call me a Baylover, I call you a sheepfucker.
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That's fine. There are some of us who want more out of the films we see. You can have your shitty Indy 4, and I will be content that a film like Raiders was made. I enjoy asking for more and getting it every once in a while. The difference is that with a little more care and some actual talent, we get films like Star Wars and Empire Strikes Back instead of shit like Ice Pirates and Battle Beyond the Stars.
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is possibly the worst curse word ever invented. Ironically, it is mainly used by people who meet its definition.
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May 28, 2008 10:33:29 AM CDT
I'm through with arguing about this. You have been eloquent
by nomoredirtyjokespleaseweareyanks
and concise but I guess we shall never agree. What about all of my other points? It's obvious I do not agree about that particular subplot. What about the cinematography? What about the contempt shown in the backyard hide and seek. It was drock, pure and simple.
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May 28, 2008 10:35:40 AM CDT
What about Cuntwipe, or Spermgurgler?
by nomoredirtyjokespleaseweareyanks
dude, you need to get out more. But Sheepfuckers not bad.
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just curious.
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Thats the problem, you didn't get "realistic-looking robots thrashing the crap out of each other". You got a human movie. Micheal Bay said before that he wanted to make it a human movie, not a bashing robots movie. Case in point, the scene were bumble bee is fighting a bad guy and instead to seeing that take place you see a glimpse or two in the background and hear it while Shia and girl run around doing something else.
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Both the comics and cartoon had plenty of human interaction. Otherwise, why the point of the term "Robots in Disguise"? Who would they be disguising themselves from? Each other? Why would they need to do that? They had been warring for centuries already! That was never the reason for their alternate modes on earth. The alternate modes were so they could fit in, unnoticed. The humans were needed for scale and impact. The Witwicky family were an extremely important part of both the comics and cartoon. There was just as much human interaction those, if not more. The last hour or so of Transformers was indeed "realistic-looking robots thrashing the crap out of each other". How can you say otherwise?
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I agree that too much time was spent on the meatbags. That's not to say I think it should have been all 'bots all the time. But there is no way in hell a fucking grenade launcher should have been the "Independence Day Virus™". The humans should have been helpless passengers on this ride with the resolution to the whole mess being Transformer-centric, not Sam shoving a fucking cube up Megatron's ass.
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about 12 years old. Go back to masturbating over those half-naked Megan Fox pics. That, or grow the fuck up. I thought Indy 4 was an average film, BTW. Last Crusade was much better.
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in that Bay really doesn't give a shit what the wrapping of the film is, he just wants to make his slow-motion turns and over-the-shoulder sun shots, concept be damned.
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urinating bumblebee- ok that is a given- but it brought a laff in the theatre so somebody liked it.
who talked through the radio- actually nice character point
Centrefold Hacker- so all hackers got to be geeks?
That fat black asshole- true did nothing , until the end that is, not particularly likeable but served a point
the chicks criminal record and Shias subsequent snub- explained how she could hot wire a car....) -
Ok, so you know more of the story of Transformers then me. I mainly just played with the toys. But I don't agree with you that the last hour was just robots beating the shit out of each other. It was yes, but still in the background of humans running around doing shit.
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in a week and a half, do you take a burgar out the garbage or do you starve, i'll take the burgar (TRANSFORMERS), anyday......
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in the comics or the cartoon. Also, the Decepticons were brought down in Bay's film by a combination of Autobot and human technology. If Bumblebee hadn't been brought back into the battle, they probably wouldn't have won. Ironhide and Ratchet were outnumbered and outmatched after Jazz was killed. It was 4 against 2 at that point, at least until Optimus got there. The humans were having a pretty tough time of it. Josh Duhamel's character states this several times. The sabot rounds were not some sort of "magic virus", just a minor weakness. They nailed Scorponok with them earlier, and he *still* got away nearly unscathed.
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Just because you didn't like something doesn't make it shit. I know your mamma told you the sun rises and sets in your ass crack but that simply isn't true. I love Raiders but I can also enjoy Indy 4 and I make no apologies for that. I watch plenty of art house cinema and features that exist off the beaten path; usually in the presence of poser elitists like you who actually delude yourselves into thinking you have any real working knowledge of art. You don't, and no amount of slandering me and others who don't subscribe to your narrow, pedantic theories regarding quality cinema is going to imbue you with any actual insight or make your weak sauce points any stronger. You don't demand more from films, you just think you do. And Kudos to being a bandwagon clown; your mention of Raiders and Empire, etc, is so fucking stale and tired. Why even see new films if all you can muster is the enthusiasm to dry hump the past?
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thank you for the proper use of the word "pedantic".
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Wow.
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I never mentioned enjoying "art house film", I don't and never have. I used Raiders and Empire as an example BECAUSE INDY 4 WAS FUCKING DISCUSSED IN THIS THREAD. It's CONTEXTUAL you fucking fink. I told you you could enjoy what you want, and I would do the same. If I demand perfection in the type of films I go to it's always contextual to the genre which again, is why I held up Raiders and Empire as my examples, if you prefer a more modern example the first Matrix film works too, as does Equilibrium and hell Batman Begins, all movies that could have sucked that took the proper care to not sink them into the abyss of their genre's bretheren. So go stuff your assumptions up your art house attending ass, because I truly think that's probably code for "porno theater" and the poser elitist you sat next to couldn't have been me because I prefer to masturbate in the comfort of my own home.
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Transformers was pretty good. Nice addition to the cast, I think.
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wanna make out?
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May 28, 2008 11:16:19 AM CDT
j2talk...shit forgot about the hotwiring
by nomoredirtyjokespleaseweareyanks
See seagrass, that's how you prove me wrong spermgurgler.
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The Rock is the only somewhat entertaining film he ever did, and that is due to Connery being the man.
Here's a thought for the writers of the new movie--MAKE THE ROBOTS CHARACTERS. The Comics and the TV show (yes it was a glorified commercial) made the Robots the main characters of the piece, not the humans--and with appropriate writing and directing, they could do that in the films as well.
But they wont.
What we will get is a razor thin plot, Big explosions, action sequences that are hard to watch do to overly designed robots handheld camera passes and no internal sense of logic, and a lot of flag-waiving. In short, a Michael Bay film.
Baw Weep Granna Weep Ninny Bom, Motherfrakkers. -
Since they decided to show how transformers take their shape, what stops them from ever dying? Can't they always just morph into a newer model? I don't think they ever explained that in the show or comics. I mean since Indiana is invincible shouldn't a robot from space be as well?
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Equilibrium was one of the shittiest science fiction action films I have ever seen...mostly because Taye Diggs and Angus MacFayden must never have gotten the memo about the characters NOT HAVING LARGE EMOTIONS.
Taye Diggs: "Isn't it so great not to have emotions?"
CRACKS A GIANT GRIN
Angus MacFayden: "Why Yes, it is. Our lack of emotions is WHY I SCREAM MOST OF MY DIALOGUE!!!!!"
They both cackle maniacally.
Taye Diggs: "Did your check for this horrible movie clear?"
Horrible f*cking movie. -
They should look like Giant Transforming Japanese Robots...because the toys they were based on were GIANT TRANSFORMING JAPANESE ROBOTS.I swear, they would look cool. There is no shame in having them look like the vehicles they turn into. In the original concept, they send the probe out which rebuilt them ON THE SURFACE to look like human vehicles that closely matched their Cybertron form--this means that they only look like cars and planes on the outside, NOT atom by atom recreations of cars and planes.
It would make more sense. -
I watched Equilibrium with a room full of friends. I could appreciate the low budget action but Taye Diggs showed emotion from the start and it ruined the film. Ditto with that MacFayden guy.
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Lol, it may not be the best example, but it was a nice little film that surprised me compared to much of the low-budget fare out there.
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Each robot has its own "Spark" which is basically its soul. Basically, a 'bot could survive as long as it had its spark. This idea wasn't really mentioned much in the early days of the series, but was really expanded upon in Beast Wars and the newer animated shows. The Allspark from Bay's film is meant to emulate the Creation Matrix, which the Primes carried in their chest, and which gave the Transformers life. I'm guessing that the Allspark in Bay's movie didn't really kill Megatron...it will probably end up turning him into something more powerful in the next film (Galvatron). That's really the only way they can handle it without severly fucking up established Transformers canon.
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was the absolute worst thing about the animated movie. I thought that shit was lame even when I was a kid. Just like I thought "Dare To Be Stupid" was lame. It's like putting a fart joke into a Star Wars film...oh, wait.
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that we even got a live-action Transformers film in our lifetime, regardless of whether or not it met expectations. Hearing Peter Cullen on the big screen was a childhood thrill I got to experience twice, and the arrival of the Autobots was note-perfect (especially the score).
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I hear Rainn will play the "Assistant to the leader of the Autobots"
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We should only consider ourselves lucky when they actually get it right. Otherwise, we are just being happy that our lowered expectations were met...which is not a happy thing--it is kind of sad.
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and that's enough for me. No one will ever convince me that Transformers is a bad film. I've watched it several times, and the only things that annoy me are Turturro and of course Bumblebee's bathroom break. However, those are not enough to make me hate the film, not one bit.
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He is the most annoying guy!
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Bay knows his demographic. TF was written for Johnny f'in Six Pack who likes big s'plosions and could care less about dialog and character development. TF was a Cleveland steamer and Bay wipes his arse with the millions. TF2 will be the same.
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my expectations were never lowered, but they were realistic. It's a movie based on a toy. It had robots beating on each other. It had robots transforming into vehicles. It rising action, a climx, and falling action. It was well-acted (except for Turturro), had high production values, and the narrative made sense. And I was entertained. I almost feel sorry for people who can't be entertained by movies like Transformers or Speed Racer. I really do.
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May 28, 2008 12:23:24 PM CDT
seagrass, there's a difference between the two
by nomoredirtyjokespleaseweareyanks
Transformers was drock, Speed Racer was great. Can you honestly not see the difference between the two?
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but you sure act like you are. Cleveland Steamer? That's a pretty low-brow way of describing a film. Sounds like something Johnny f'in Six Pack would do. By the way, why the hell would you write "s'plosions" when "explosions" contains the exact same number of characters?
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It was just like Transformers: an entertaining movie based on a cartoon/toy. It was nowhere close to "great". Jaws is "great". Citizen Kane is "great". 2001 is "great". Speed Racer and Transformers are good, entertaining films. That's it.
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Yeah I agree with you there that we should be happy with seeing a live action Transformers movie being played in the background of another movie, and what we saw was bad ass. Thanks for explaining the life spark thing. See my biggest harp of the film isn't so much the human part, which everything with Shia I thought was handled fine. It was the Jon Voight/John Turturro/Anthony Anderson sub plots that were all just terrible and crapily acted. It was almost like those three actors didn't believe this would be anything bigger then a B-movie, I mean they are all pretty much B-actors right now. And they didn't take is serious, at least Shia took it serious and the girl may as well been a stick that said insert typical high school female here but I could handle all that. I can even handle Tyrese and the guy that who wants to be Timothy Olyphant dumb military crap. Because like all of that was overblown and ridiculous and entertaining at least. But if you are going to make a movie with a computer nerd where everything else in the movie is overblown, don't fucking try to tell me that this super smart spaz computer nerd does all his hacking on what looked like the family computer in the living room he shared. Give me retarded Die Hard 4 computer nerds. You can't go from everything being over the top to silly computer nerd using a IBM from the mid 90's. Also don’t tell me Agent Simmons is part of some super secret organization, then have him act like the Dictator of Tomania. Give me Agent K, give me President Thomas J. Whitmore (yes I realize that Voigt was just a Defense Secretary, but I could have sworn in the movie they said he was the president). I can deal with the stupid piss jokes. When the (3) most respected/experienced actors in the movie fucking act like its a big joke and don't even try to act like they believe what’s going on while Shia and gang are like COME ON GUYS ITS REAL! And its not that these three actors were miscast (well Turturro was) they just didn't care, which makes me not care. I mean Jon Voight gave a better performance in Anaconda then he did in Transformers, and lets face it they are the same type of movie. Plus now after seeing Speed Racer I guess I will expect more from my cartoon to movies. Otherwise keep it like TMNT which was a great transition from the source material.
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...it was sloppily made, the robots were over-designed, it managed somehow to out-stupid the original version (and the original version was stupid, make no mistake), the humor wasn't funny, some of the effects work was embarrassingly shoddy, and after suffering through The Twenty and then still more commercials after that, I'd appreciate it if the film itself would at least pretend to be something other than a commercial for the military, GM, and whoever else paid them to parade their products around on the big screen. It was an irritating, noisy, distasteful pile of crap, and that it didn't flop like THE ISLAND says shameful things about all of humanity, but geek subculture in particular. Are we that tasteless, that easy to placate, that we'll swallow any retarded trash with a familiar title and a bunch of shit exploding? At least the cartoon pretended to care about telling a story, even if it was a toy commercial at heart. The movie did nothing of the sort. FANTASTIC FOUR, my former whipping boy as far as horrendously botched films of this sort go, was merely over-commercialized and generally poor filmmaking. TRANSFORMERS was loathsome, soulless trash with a few pointless and visually incoherent displays of technical proficiency that added up to nothing resembling entertainment. Cinema and humanity itself are both poorer for its existence.
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He was the worst part of Juno. Thinks that he's much funnier than he is. Listen, ass. Just because your show has great writers that make you sound funny, doesn't make you funny.
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...break into his home, took a shit in his cocaine table, wait for him in his closet and bit him in his ass. His police statement would still be... "It was an entity of some form, officer... The one who took a shit on my cocai-- er, I mean, coffee table. It had a sense of geography and some stuff I know of, like explosions and awesome shit... But still... I never saw it in my life before. Do I need to see a doctor about my ass?"
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Family Guy has a funny trailer for "Passion of the Christ 2: Crucify This" in an episode. Saw the trailer on YouTube a few months ago.
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with relative unknowns. Turturro was not good. I didn't have any problem with Voight. He gave a pretty straightforward performance. People claim he was turned into an action hero, but that's idiocy. He did what any sane human being would do in that situation: he defended himself. Hell, all he did was fire a shotgun a few times. That hardly makes an action hero.
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It's so corny, "what up bitches" a couple years down the road people will watch this and just roll their eyes. You know how you watch Superman 2 and the campy scenes make you cringe. Go watch Transformers again it's the same thing. Also the people who defend this movie sound like the same people who liked Batman and Robin when it first came out. Once it's not "cool" to defend it anymore the movie will be forgotten and laughed at if remembered.
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that Fantastic Four is a better movie than Transformers, you are sadly mistaken. I'm just glad I don't surround myself with those as pretentious as yourself.
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and Spectre can predict the future, and also how they presume to know the thoughts and feelings of millions of people...just like that fuck Jeremy over at Chud. The (il)logic that is on display here is staggering. By the way, I hated Batman and Robin, and I still do. The fact that you even brought that movie up in the same sentence as Transformers shows that you know zero about film. Oh, and the "what up bitches" line was no worse than any of Scatman C's delivery in the cartoon. Jazz has always been the stereotype of a "black" Transformer (even though in the cartoon he was ironically painted white). It's unfortunate, but true. I'd say that Jar-Jar Binks was a hell of a lot more of a racist portrayal than Jazz was.
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May 28, 2008 1:13:46 PM CDT
Bullshit, it'll suck shit, like green shit from Bay's asshole
by pomophobe
BOOOOOOO!!!
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May 28, 2008 1:15:26 PM CDT
nah dude, a pissin bumblebee is the same as
by nomoredirtyjokespleaseweareyanks
bat nipples. Fool.
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May 28, 2008 1:22:46 PM CDT
Schumacher, though guilty of Batman and Robin
by nomoredirtyjokespleaseweareyanks
trumps Bay due to Falling Down. An actual good movie. Whooda thunk it?
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The entire running length of Batman and Robin was a travesty. You can't compare the two. Transformers was fucking Citizen Kane compared to Batman and Robin.
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One of my favorite movies, actually. D-Fens!
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May 28, 2008 1:26:19 PM CDT
Thankyou George Washington, Goodnight!
by nomoredirtyjokespleaseweareyanks
Chim chiminy chim chim charooo!
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May 28, 2008 1:27:55 PM CDT
D-Fens. Good to see some common ground
by nomoredirtyjokespleaseweareyanks
I just despise Bay.
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May 28, 2008 1:49:13 PM CDT
The late Sydney Pollack had a better sense of action
by orbots commander
sequences over Bay. He wasn't known for making action movies, but in scenes from Three Days Of the Condor with Robert Redford and in The Firm with Cruise, he staged a couple of thrilling, at the time, fight and chase sequences which were coherent, exciting, and also important, had a sense of geography. The master at this of course is Spielberg, the crappiness of the new Indiana Jones movie aside. Spielberg back at his peak had no equal in staging and shooting fantastic action sequences.
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I love how some of you self-ass-fuckers cry about Lucas and Spielberg but thnk Michael Bay "kicks ass".It makes me think that you collected He-Man instead of Star Wars figures and had your parents take you to Ernest Goes To Camp twice.
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May 28, 2008 1:52:39 PM CDT
Do you think they'll play the Beach Boys at the start?
by keeper of chimps
Oh wait, that was Herbie: Fully Loaded. Which one was Bernie Mack in. God, they're like the same fucking movie!
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Let's revisit his momentous remarks shall we folks?? "I enjoyed Transformers for what it was and I will remind you that not everything needs to possess the artistic merit of There Will Be Blood or No Country for Old Men. There are different kinds of films and my expectations for those different genres are varied. I didn't walk into Indy 4 expecting the same experience I received from watching The Assassination of Jesse James.(Although in retrospect Indy is a hell of a lot more fun) Transformers is based on a cartoon that was in turn nothing more than a daily, 30 minute toy commercial. All I wanted to see was realistic-looking robots thrashing the crap out of each other, which is precisely what I got." Wow that was really something else. Three bullshit remarks in one post let's give him a hand. For our audience at home let's point them out. Bullshit argument #1 is that "it doesn't need to be "There Will be Blood" to be good". Watch his technique in misrepresenting the points of views of others, amazing! Bullshit argument #2 is "It's based on a cartoon!" and bullshit argument #3 is "It had giant robots exploding and that's all it needed!" Oh and bonus points for totally missing the point of the entire Indiana Jones franchise. Alright LastCleric congratulations and for your ventures into stupidity you get free tickets to opening night of Don't Mess With the Zohan, I'm sure you'll have a great time. Well that's it for tonight folks we'll see you next time! Goodnight!
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It was a great popcorn movie with the best special effects i've ever seen. Bay also stays away from some of his annoying "Bayisms" like having women portrayed as raving, crying loons.
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shit outta me
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"Oh, wait. Your stride is 3 feet. My stride is TWO FUCKING CITY BLOCKS!"I hate it when stupid two-story robots seem to run as slow as a 6-foot meatbag. And when teeny bikes can catch up to sexy muscle cars.
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Like his old pal Don Simpson. WAH WAH!
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Has anyone heard what they're planning for his design? The only thing I've read is that he's (perhaps) going to be in this one.
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Such bile, such oozing jealousy. I guess Mr. Wilson is now a success.
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for his entire bullshit rant. What, exactly did you expect from Transformers that you claim it didn't deliver?
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Hmm, so technologically advanced giant alien robots can't slow down and stay behind a slower human order to cover him? Also, the robots weren't that big. They were about the same size as King Kong, who didn't have a stride of "TWO FUCKING CITY BLOCKS". Think before you post, people!
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(1) Take a high-def camera, but push for high-contrast grain. (2) Break the zoom control to indiscriminately vary its wide-to-zoom function. (3) Strap camera to an over-caffeinated, epileptic, bouncing kangaroo. (Note: Camera does NOT have to be tightly mounted.) (4) Film whatever in PATENTED "Shake-N-Bay(ke)" (TM, ®, ©) shaky cam style. (5) Edit video so that there are no establishing location shots, no re-occurring framework for scene identity, and cannot last longer than 2.5 seconds per edited cut. (6) Set to "edgy" music. Any Aerosmith will do. (7) Release to massive hordes of A.D.D. kids with sugar I.V.s inserted in veins. (8) Cash checks. IT'S THAT EASY, KIDS!!!
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by anyone except for Michael Bay, and turned out exactly the same, I guarantee that there wouldn't have been as many haters.
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then you fucking do it.
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How am I supposed to leave the office with a raging hardone?!?!?! I am suing Busted T's.
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Not 2 city blocks. But a stride much larger that a 6-foot meatbag. "Ok. I'll slow down. You run 50 steps and then I'll take 1. But it will look like I'm running full-out."Think before you post, people!
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Sorry, I'm not a Hollywood player. I don't sleep with kangaroos. (Insert your own "Unlike your mother and her kangaroo-sized pocket snatch, you Bay-loving kook" joke here.)
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Like every other useless fanboy on the planet, you think you know everything about everything. Golly, if I gave you a paintbrush and some paint, you could recreate the complete works of Van Gogh and Picasso! Enjoying Transformers and liking Michael Bay are two completely different things.
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Hmmm...so, by your logic, the T-Rexes/Spinosaurus in the Jurassic Park films could never have been outrun by human beings...yet, mysteriously, they were, and mysteriously, not one fanboy bitched about it. Interesting.
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I enjoyed Transformers as it didn't pretend to be any more than what I wanted in a summer film. It promised giant robots fighting in a downtown urban area. I got my money's worth. Special effects were top notch. They even DID have some good energy, humor, etc. It even had an element of deaths in it, as you pointed out in an earlier comment. But regarding Mr. Bay fans, I just luv yanking fans' chains. (And I do know everything... even if I didn't wank off to the Transformers comic books like some other unnamed fanboys!) Kiss & hugs & make up?
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Well directed action would be nice. Oh and how about the Transformers actually have their own personalities, including the Decepticons, you know cause that's the ENTIRE POINT OF TRANSFORMERS! Other than that not having one terrible meaningless sub story after the next would have been pretty kick ass.
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Well, why not?
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tell me how. All three of those arguments are strawman crap that have nothing whatsoever to do with the content of the film but instead rely on vague principles to make their point. For instance, no one is arguing the film should have been There Will be Blood, if you have to twist any argument against the film into that, then you've already lost. It's flatly wrong, no one has or will ever say that.
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Yank all the chains you want. I only like two Michael Bay films. Armageddon should have been MST3K'ed, actually. That would have made it a better movie. Poor directors can turn out good product from time to time. Event Horizon, anyone? I apologize for the "useless fanboy" dig. I'm just pissed at previous comments by certain peoples, and took it out on you.
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Damn! I love these kinds of talkbacks! Fuck Bay and fuck TINO2! That's all I have to say. If I'm gonig to be pay close to $10 for a movie and its 2hrs long; you FUCKING right I want some fucking substance to it. It's like pay for a dinner (which you already know shoud come with your certain choices) and drink and getting a 3-day old happy meal that’s been under the heating lamps for way too long. Bullshit I say! Hell, every one has the right to like a movie no matter what. BUT! You still have to call an Ace an Ace; and Bayformers was in fact shitty. You can like the movie, but you still have to admit that movie suck Unicron ass! And the cheap ass excuse that "what do you expect from a cartoon/comercial/etc..." is utter bullshit! Want prove that ANY protery done well and respecting the source material can make work? Pirates Of The Caribbean, was based on—of all things!—Disneyland’s most boring ride! Expectations were super low. No one ever thought that movie was even going to break even. BLAM! The movie had a story it had great characters and great sets. The acting great and the movie was done right, it became a true SUMMER BLOCKBUSTER and summer movie. Granted that the source material was a damn boat ride, but you can see (if you ever rode that sucker that the movie did stay true to the source material.) Oh, not convinced? Want more? IRON MAN. Based on the comic books. We all know the track record Hollywood has been shitting out on the superhero movies for some years now. And again, a movie based of all things, a comic book, has PROVEN that a movie DONE right and respecting the source material can be a real summer movie and a blocker buster. So stop this bullshit of “what do you expect” coz that’s just showing how low your fucking standards are. If that’s how you want it fine, but when it comes to properties with a global recognition and very loyal and outspoken fans base; YOU FUCKING RIGHT I demand more from the fuckheads handling it! Yeah, like people didn’t expect a certain level from Lucas when the prequals came out or for that matter Indy 4. Hell, I want some side orders when I order a dinner, and you goddamn right I want more than a terrible script and nonsensical plot.
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it's bullshit because you didn't give any reasons why you thought LastCleric's statements are invalid. You just repeated them and made snide comments about them. If you are going to argue, then at least make a point as to why you think someone is wrong. If you are going to be a dickhead, then by all means, just be yourself.
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You are right about the dinos. BTW, I hated Jurassic Park. No fanboy reaction from me.This sort of thing is all subjective. Some people people don't have problem with logic issues. Other people do. Most will forgive some movies and not others. (I certainly fall into this group.) I have friends who loved Transformers (and Jurassic Park.) I also have friends who didn't. I'm not a Bay fan and I thought this was by far his worst movie. But that's just my opinion. And yes, I did watch this movie with my "hate Bay" baggage. Still I hoped it would enjoy it. I certainly understand why people who are Bay fans did.And I hate this "editor."
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"Beets. Bears. Bay-bitching."
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but it wasn't perfect. I'd say that Transformers met the standards of "TRUE SUMMER BLOCKBUSTER"...just not your standards. And that's fine. Pirates was good, but Depp carried that movie. Just like Downey carried Iron Man. Take those two factors out, and what do you have? Two pretty good summer flicks. Exactly what Transformers was...a pretty good summer movie.
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Saying that if you didn't like Transformers then you were expecting There Will Be Blood is pretty self explanatory in how ridiculous it is. Theres a fucking ocean of films that exist in between those two. Most films in fact. Good genre and action films included. But you're a smart guy I don't need to explain something so rudimentary to you. As for the "it's just a cartoon" is no less ridiculous. Firs of all a bad movie is a bad movie, no matter what it's based on. After all Spider Man's black symbiote costume was written into the comics just to sell toys, as was the entire secret wars storyline. Does that mean any story thereafter featuring the black costume can be total crap? Does that mean Spider Man 3 (which we all agree was awful)was good simply because part of it was based on a toy selling gimmick? It doesn't matter what the original intentions were. And the cartoon at least made the transformers individual characters, not deep ones, but they were there. The film couldn't even manage that. There was also a comic series that was far better and went far deeper than the cartoon did. So if you want, think of it as a comic book movie. "All it needed was explosions and giant robots", also bullshit. A film, no matter what the genre, can have solid writing, pacing, directing, and characters. Especially one with a budget of this size and a creative playground this big to work from. If that's all YOU wanted from a film then have a ball, but don't get pissed at people for wanting a little quality, especially from a franchise with as much potential as Transformers. I didn't explain all this in my previous post because I think most people understand why these arguments don't hold a shred of water, the people making them included. The only reason it leaves someones mouth (or fingertips as it were) is because they are desperate to justify their tastes or they don't expect to be taken to task on them. They've been disproven again and again ad nauseam.
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Arguing about realism in any science-fiction movie is rather ridiculous when you think about it.
Example: seeing a living, breathing alien inside an asteroid that has no atmosphere and is open to the vacuum of space (Empire Strikes Back). It's completely absurd, but you don't care. I really don't care about the stride of a 25 foot robot. All I care about is if it looks awesome and if it blows up shit real good. Just like Jurassic Park. I wanted dinosaurs chasing and eating people, and I got just that. I could have cared less about Sam Neill's aversion to children. -
You just want action, I want a little character and story with my action. It's really the difference between a bad and a great film. Now you like Jurassic Park because dinosaurs eat people, I also like dinosaurs eating people, but having good characters is what makes that film better than say, Transformers. Having good characters and a well told story can never hurt action, only enhance it and give it context and emotion.
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industrykiller posting in another thread multiple times, what else is new. TRANSFORMERS rocked, it had a plot, an easily followed plot. i had no problem following the action, even in the last 30 minutes. and YES !! BAY does know action...i never saw THE ISLAND but armageddon, bad boys and bad boys 2 were amazing....the rock. all great....pearl harbors only downside was the fact that it was based on true events...like titanic, we all knew what was going to happen for half the movie....just had to wade thru sappy screenplay(which bay had nothing to do with) to get to the action. ...cant wait for the teaser trailer !!
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i got what i wanted.expected out of seeing transformers......maybe it helped that I had read the novelization before hand and subconciously filled in the blanks...but never the less the movie i saw was what i expected to see and i wasnt disappointed...$5 well spent....took my son to see it twice...
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you want more out of your films. That's cool. I thought that the character development in Bay's film was fine. For example, you knew that Optimus was noble and good, and you knew that Megatron was evil. What more did you want from those two characters? That's all they ever were in the comics/cartoon. If you think they were deeper than that, well, I've got a bridge I'd like to sell you. Also, if Transformers was as awful as the fanboys say it was, then why did so many people go see it? I know plenty of intelligent people who enjoyed the hell out of Transformers. Doctors, lawyers, even a film scholar I know. Why would they want to go see such a terrible movie? Simple: because it wasn't terrible. I still haven't seen anyone give a solid argument as to why they hated Transformers, other than Michael Bay directed it.
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were paper thin, and you know it. They existed mainly to become dino-donuts. The characterization in Jurassic Park was just as shallow as in Transformers. For example, the only character I remotely cared about was Muldoon, and he freaking got eaten because he did something totally against his character! A big game hunter, going against raptors with established pack mentality (hell, he told us that), and he basically offers himself up as an appetizer. Poor writing, there. Muldoon survived in the book because he knew what he was doing, and didn't do anything out of character.
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secondary character.
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Sometimes when I read talkbacks, I despair for the human race.
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90% of the action was terribly directed. The Transformers had no personalities. Especially Megatron, who yeah in the cartoon was evil but the voice acting (there is a reason why Frank Welker still works so much) and interplay with his fellow decepticons (particularly Starscream) gave him a character far better than the random deep voiced evil random robot X the movie portrays. Prime was also given nothing to do, and almost came off as oafish. The rest of the transformers, indistinguishable. Fodder. The decepticons didn't even speak. And wasting a character like Starscream is a fucking crime, although when they do use him I'm sure they'll just fuck it up. And making Bumblebee not talk? What the fuck was the point of that? They wasted the relationship between Spike and bumblebee, which should have been the heart of the movie but instead was just forced. The pacing of the film is also awful. It takes an hour for anything to happen while it concentrates on the kid, the soldiers, the government, the hackers etc. You might say "IK you just said you like rich characterization." Well if the script gave them anything except most cliched shit in the world to say maybe it would have been more enjoyable. Also if it had just concentrated on Spike and left the other characters completely out the film would have been much stronger and tighter. Also there was Sector 7, the less said about that the better. And yeah bay's directing didn't help. there are several scenes int hat film that are blatant car commercials, not just product placement mind you, but actual car commercials in the middle of the film. Terrible.
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Shouldn't you be helping grandma?
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And the fact that most of them don't die is proof enough that they aren't just fodder for the dinos. They actually have dimensions in no small part to excellent performances. Yeah I agree the way Muldoon buys it is a cop out though. It's also got one of the biggest directorial flaws in history when the Tyrannosaur paddock suddenly becomes a 70 foot drop off.
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here's my original review of Transformers. I got to see it on the lot, and MAN did people there love it. of course, it's LA, they're all retarded.
Hey guys, BadMrWonka here. got to see an early showing of Transformers here in LA tonight, and I thought I'd weigh in. hopefully you can use it. I am going to reference a lot of things from the movie, but I'll try to be vague so as to not spoil too much...
First off, since this is such a divisive movie, I should let you know briefly where I stood before seeing the movie. Although I'm the prime age range, I never really got into Transformers as a kid. I saw the cartoons, and I remember having a couple toys, but it sort of passed on by without leaving too much of a lasting impression. So I hold no glorious standards for the source material. If that differs from your take on it, hopefully you'll take that into account when reading my review. On the other hand, I really don't care for Michael Bay that much. I don't hate his films, I just don't like them very much. I don't like the fact that I can see little cliched moments that are virtually identical in every one of his movies, I don't like that he seems like a dick in real life, I don't like his little beard. But I also don't expect his movies to be anything other than what they are. I just hope they're not quite as bad as the one before. I don't think Micheal Bay has ever ruined a movie...he simply chooses projects, or develops them, or has them developed for him, that are innately unsalvageable as "real" films. (Tell me how Bad Boys, as a concept, could have been an Oscar contender...) Well, maybe Pearl Harbor could have been good...
So anyway, on with the show. I got no intro whatsoever for the film, no one said a word. Which isn't surprising since it's obviously finished by now. The first action sequence is amazing, the sound is incredible. After a few cliched characters giving a few cliched lines in the midst of cliched moments, it begins in earnest, and knocks the wind out of you. Then we get onto Shia's story, and it's actually good! The jokes are funny, the car buying sequence is hilarious...everything is actually WORKING! There's a Judd Apatow reference?!?! Are you kidding me? Transformers? good? Even VERY good?
Then it all kind of goes to shit. The inevitable diarrhea you were expecting from eating a Michael Bay-rrito starts to rumble in your stomach. The glimpse of a well-made movie that could have been, falls by the wayside as we get into the "plot" of the film. The traditional Bay stereotypes are all there, saying all the same crapola you've heard them say a million times. There's the hot girl with obscene amounts of knowledge on a specific topic, and yes it comes in handy. There's the black stereotype, yelling at the top of his lungs, because that's what black stereotypes do. There's the military guy who just wants to see his wife and kid. There's BadMrWonka burying the hopes he had in the first 20 minutes.
As the movie plods along, it can't seem to decide whether to take itself seriously or not. There are a host of in-jokes, from references to the old series, to actual references to other Michael Bay movies. I am NOT joking. It's truly cringe-worthy. But the worst part is how awkaward the explication is. When Megatron gives the all important "this is what the hell's going on" speech, it's the same as the audience got in the opening intro before the title. So we're sitting there going, "yeah, we got it, are you going to DO something?" And then they fart around in Shia's yard for 20 minutes. A house being accidentally destroyed was funny in Harry and the Hendersons. Here, it goes on WAY too long.
The rest of the movie is a huge fight scene, wrapped around a couple twists in the plot that are so silly, I half expected a new character to be named "Deus ex machina" (perhaps in the sequel?). There are HUGE gaping plot holes, and things that make no sense plot-wise. And here's a tip, if you have robots that can't really emote in their faces, and you want to have a touching moment, and Michael Bay is directing, and Steve Jablonsky is doing the music? Just go ahead and shoot yourself. Cause it ain't happening.
It seems, when the Transformers are first arriving to earth, that they simply choose the first car/truck they see, and change into that. and when Bumblebee is made fun of by Shia's girl for being a junky old car, he transforms into a snazzy new version. so it seems they can change into anything at will. so then why does it matter if, say, your legs get cut off? make new ones! why not be a different car, if someone is chasing you and knows what you look like?
The worst part is they do what I REALLY hate about this big movies, they SHOVE them full of smaller characters, introduce them, give them a little personality trait and a little thing to do, and then we NEVER get any resolution to their story. Only Shia and his chick and one other character get ANY kind of resolution.
So, what you really want to know:
The fights: they are pretty cool, but there is SO much going on, and SO quick a pace, and the camera is SO shaky and in need of Ritalin, it's hard to make out what is happening a lot of the time. And then, after 10 minutes of flying pixels and explosions, and one-liners, there will be a long, EXTREMELY slow shot with a Transformer doing some maneuvre over a pedestrian as the "camera" pans just right to catch it all. Isn't there anything in between the frenetic, what the fuck did I just see, type of shots, and the "ok, I get it, you spent a lot on this film's FX" shots? christ.
The acting: Shia, again, ESPECIALLY in the first 20 minutes, is gold with the funny lines. he's really good, honestly. I would seriously challenge anyone to say otherwise. when he has to be tough, well, he's not really tough. But neither is his character. Other than that, he just runs a lot. When he has to deliver the funny, it's not bad. Overall, I doubt any young actor could have done any better, and a lot could have done worse. He is in NO WAY the problem with this movie.
John Turturro seems like he's drunk. Literally, I mean that I think he may have been drunk while filming some of the scenes. But it works, and he has some funny lines and bits. It feels like one of those things where he said, "yeah I'll do it, but only if I get to be quirky". better than being a Bay cliche, I guess. Everyone else hams it up. The girls are hot, and uninteresting. Voight is wrinkly. Duhamel is not really acting, just yelling military jargon and shooting. Except for delivering the dumbest line of the movie to Shia. The entire theater actually groaned and chuckled in what was supposed to be a serious moment. Then he does the most unthinkably ridiculous and implausible (yes, even for a movie with giant fighting robots) stunt I can recall seeing in a movie in a long time. And he goes a little crazy for a second. And then he goes back to his jargon immediately.
The source material: it felt, to me, like they tried to make up for the fact that all the Transformers look completely different from their 80's counterparts, by making them talk and act EXACTLY like their 80's counterparts. Which, to me, seemed silly. But people I was with, who read comics and had more affinity for the original series, said the dialogue rang true. I just thought it was silly. To me, the old cartoons saying these completely unrealistic lines was fine. When you have this new, sleek, fast machine, saying things that are, at best, cheesy. It sounds ultra-cheesy.
is it a boy and his car? well yes and no, but if you're afraid that's all it is, don't worry. plenty of robot on robot fighting...well...blurring past the digitally created camera at super speeds, to be exact. Shia's relationship with Bumblebee is actually fairly decently done, and it didn't feel like it was too much. The house/garden scene was, though.
Overall, I think Spielberg directed the first 20 minutes, stuck his name on, and never looked back. I simply do not see him in this movie after the beginning. It's all Bay all day every day. And they stole a line exchange from From Dusk til Dawn. fuck that.
If you are predisposed to like this movie, you will find plenty to like, and a little to bemoan. If you are predisposed to hate it, you'll find plenty to hate, but I gaurantee you'll laugh a few times in the beginning and get your ass kicked by the first fight scene. And Scott Farkus is in it.
If you're in the middle, well, it will depend on how patient you are with Bay. Did you see Bad Boys, Armaggedon, The Rock and Pearl Harbor? Ever want to see them again, but with gigantic robots from space? Transformers is playing at your local theater.
BadMrWonka
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Search your feelings, you know it to be true. Oh, no, wait, thats right, most of you didn't bother to see the best movie of the summer thus far. Too bad for you. Once it hits dvd/bluray, be sure to let me know how hard you kicked yourself for missing the IMAX run of one of the most insane visual pop-art explosions of pure awesome ever put to film.
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FOR REAL THEN IT WOULD BE LIKE VOLTRON AND JURASSIC PARK ROLLED INTO ONE!
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Fact. Simply because Transformers relied on pop culture by mentioning eBay and all these other fucking things. They focused on the over a dozen human characters than the transformers. The military guys in that movie were not needed. Too afraid to just have it Shia and the bots so we follow Tyrese and the ass hole from Las Vegas around the desert, reminded me of Aliens but just really shitty. Then the army guys kill more decepticons than the autobots do wtf! And the secret agency stuff flopped the agents were all idiots and their dialogue sucked. Besides Fox the movie has nothing but the like a couple cool moments between Shia and bumblebee. Transformers 2 will just have more of the same shit just maybe more Ewok robots that bounce around and make funny sounds.
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... and WTF is this I'm reading about a relationship between Starscream and Megatron? A "moment" indeed. I'm sorry, but as I recall, that was one brisk line of dialogue that lasted about 0.2 seconds. There were no relationships between ANY of the transformers. No development what so ever. They were just.... there. This was a movie called Transformers that was barely about tranformers, obviously made by someone who didn't know Transformers, or give a damn what they were. He just wanted another big pay day.
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May 28, 2008 6:05:25 PM CDT
seagrass your right, but still both had good stories/plot. . .
by violator90
and you must admit that Transformers was flimsy a best. True it was not to my standards but the fact of the matter is that the whole story/plot was ridilous and it was excuted badly. Granted it was fun for some and I will admit that just hearing Prime and hearing that transforming sound--albeit for just seconds--was the best. Still the movie over all was crap.
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So its cool wit me...
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i said it once,I'll say it again....I watched Transformers and I liked it...it delivered what i expected...I'll watch the sequel and no doubt enjoy that as well...
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He's supposed to be a rookie Autobot like in the cartoon! In the movie he sounds like an old Laurence Fishburne! :0
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i thought megatron was gun in the cartoon.....
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bumblebee should have kept his radio voice....it gave him character
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Breakin' 2: Electric Boogaloo, Blood Ryne 2, Lake Placid 2. How can you forget these classic sequels??? You know Bayformers 2 will stand tall next to these giants of sequels.
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Of course, being one of the most insanely colorful and psychedelic movies ever made, feel free to get stoned or otherwise high and see it. But even stone cold sober its insane and awesome. Not that I would know since I was stoned each time I saw it at the IMAX.
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Let's face it, Bay has Nuked The Fridge with this franchise!
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Shut the F up.
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May 28, 2008 8:19:27 PM CDT
Well, I certainly hope there's no mass-shifting
by fathermcgruderkicksassforthelord
Because that would totally destroy the otherwise unflawed feel of reality in the film.
Also, can we get the yellow one to piss on 2 people at once this time, since it's part 2 and all? -
Go auto-erotically asphyxiate yourself. You aren't any cooler because you hate Episode I.
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with the exceptions of Godfather II and Star Trek II. Some were arguably as good as the originals (Empire, Aliens, Supes, to name a few) but did not SURPASS their prequels...
I haven't seen Clerks II but I heard it's good so I'll reserve judgement on that one.
Actually I think I'm gonna have to add Attack of the Clones to the list - as flawed as it was, it shat all over Phantom Menace...
As for Bay, I actually liked The Island (probably the only person on the planet who did) and while I can stomach most of his other films there is no way anyone can possibly deny it - THEY ARE SHIT.
The fact that he's aiming for "popcorn" doesn't excuse the fact they suck. There are decent "popcorn" flicks out there - and none of them have the name Michael Bay attached to them.
Not one.
(obviously I don't consider Island to be popcorn - feel free to disagree) -
You know how all the black characters in the movie scream, and yelp, and do that pop-eye thing? Next they should just have white people in blackface... oh wait! Thats right, theres that movie coming out where Robert Downey Jr. is in blackface. Dang! Dey dun sure doo make thevselfs look all saldy.
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I am a 36 yr old father of two boys and as my age implies I grew up in the 80's, and like every other young boy growing up in the 80's watched Transformers, GI Joe, Thundercats, Voltron, and X-Men cartoons...Oh and He-Man too. Now that I am all growed up (yes, I meant to say "growed up" that way) I get down right exited about seeing my old heroes on the big screen, and as a rule with very few execptions LOVE the movies. However, I am getting sick and tired of hearing, and reading the word of kids who weren't even alive to see the "Transformers-The Animated Movie" whine about this movie was terrible because of a paint job, or that movie sucked because Wolverines claws pop from his knuckles, and not from metal nipples on the top of his hands... Transformers was one of the greatest movies I've seen in years, I will happily admit that there were a few things that I would have done differently, but over all the movie ROCKED!!! I really wish that all of you immature kids who think that cartoons are made with computers would stop petty nit-picking and most of all stop trying to ruin the experience for people like me who actually like movies.
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But not THAT hopeful. I mean, we'll see what happens. I enjoyed the first Transformers despite a lot of lil things. But I'll still see part 2.
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Considered a career in politics Quint? That's some damn good spin!Seriously, a giant robot taking a piss on a guy... wtf were they thinking...
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May 28, 2008 11:34:33 PM CDT
Since a lot of you can't even spell his name correctly
by thebearovingian
you're giving MICHAEL Bay more ammo to discredit you with. "All those moronic geeks on AICN with their 'Damn you, Michael Bay' can't even spell my name correctly. So that tells you a little something about these HATERS."Bring it on, Bay!
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Why is it that you all can trash bays Transformers movie but never talk about how WACK armada, cybertron(English version), this new transformers cartoon on cartoon network is? All DUMB down TO 3 year old status and yet BAY's formers had more adult theme, better dialog and compared to what Hasbro has done outside of the masterpiece line and the alternator, the robot designs are now POOP WRAP IN A PLASTIC BLANKET
BUT NO ONE TALKS AND COMPLAINS ABOUT NONE OF THIS....BELIEVE IT OR NOT BAY'S FORMERS ARE THE CLOSES TO G1 We WILL GET. like it or not.
Oh and yes i like a lot of bays movies, Island, Bad boys and The Rock, and yes, even Pear harbor,( EVERY STANKING MINUTE OF IT),i can find 200 other movies that are worse, like gobots battle of the rock lords to Anaconda 1 and 2, Battlefield Earth,Blues Brothers 2000,The Crow 2: City of Angels,Godzilla (1998),Kazaam,Mario Bros the movie, Spice World, Street Fighter, Waterworld......and the SHITFEST goes on on on and on, I dare anybody to say tranformers wasn't better then none of those movie.....I DEAR YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUU -
May 29, 2008 2:41:43 AM CDT
There's no way anyone could think the animated movie was better
by tequilamocking
It's a fucking travesty. The only reason anyone could tolerate it is a ridiculous amount of nostalgia.
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no comment needed
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Where's the thread so we can unload on that selfish fucking Bimbo about her brainless comments on the disaster in China being 'Karma' for what 'they' did to her good mates. Next she'll be saying Burma might have had many more times the deaths and injured but it's still not like it was Katrina because with Katrina they were Americans like her... Fucking stupid cow.
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So how can you say you didn't like it, or pass critical judgement upon it? You simply have no basis for your opinion because you never saw the movie. Shame too, cause you might have liked it. Oh, but wait, probably not. Unlike the unintentionally hilarious T2: WE WUV WOO ROBODADDY, SPEED RACER was funny on purpose. Its also a visual masterpiece; an explosion of pop-art psychedelic awesomeness. Not that you would know; preferring to stay in the basement furiously masturbating to T2: OLD YELLER, then seeing something unique, groundbreaking, and super-cool.
So, hows the pre-op tranny thing coming along? Are you prepared for your transformation from morbidly obese mother's basement dwelling chronic masturbator to the ivory skinned dynamic cyborg woman? Keeping in mind that, you'll probably still be morbidly obese mother's basement dwelling virgin, you'll just have lady parts instead. But then, THEN you will know what it is to touch a reasonable facsimile of the vagina without having to pay for it! -
Wow...that's so...let me think...pathetic? It's still hilarious that you keep defending CHIMP-THE MOVIE, this downright awful, unintentionally funny, ultra boring crap fest.
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Aliens while great is NOT better than the original. Terminator 2 is CERTAINLY not better than the original. Neither was Rambo or Rocky 2. Good Lord.
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just.
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I agree on all those films, especially T2 and Rocky 2. With Aliens it's close but no Lewinsky dildo.
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Monkeys and poo-flinging. Trumps all.
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Anaconda 1 is better then Transformers. Even if it got a Razzie award for worst director. Its better because its a movie called Anaconda and it didn't want none unless it had buns hun... which is why is stared J.LO. Plus it was before Jon Voight just decided that he didn't care anymore. And Ice Cube when it looked like he could've turned out to be an actor after all. Anaconda rules for all the reasons Transformers sucks. Better casting, no lame jokes, more adult oriented, no raping of the childhood and most of all we got to see the Anaconda not watch actors do things with the Anaconda doing whatever in the background.
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Your an idiot if you haven't seen Speed Racer and you want to say it sucks. I am sorry if you live and die by the Rotten Tomatoes percentage. Anyone who didn't see Speed in theaters is dumb, I'm sorry in a world where Indiana Jones Over the Hill banks 300 mil the first 5 days, and Speed is going to be a box office bomb. When in all reality you would've expected Indy to have been the mature grown up smart action adventure movie and Speed to be the dumb flashing lights cartoon to movie dumb enough for a 5 year old to follow, its amazing how its totally opposite.
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May 29, 2008 12:15:35 PM CDT
Dickblood, I love that Adrian moment
by nomoredirtyjokespleaseweareyanks
but the first Rocky is the only film Stallone made that is perfect.
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Is better then First Blood. Yes yes it is.
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No Rambo 4 is perfect as well. And Sly in Judge Dredd was perfect, the movie was not though.
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I watched those two movies back to back a couple of years ago and I noticed that they both play out in the same way. Like not story but timing wise, the scares and action sequences happen at almost the exact same spots in both movies. It was weird.
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The actions scenes in Transformers are incoherently staged and edited. It's a piece of shit.
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So how can you say anything about it, at all? If you notice, all the people here who actually saw the movie, thought it was great.
Btw, SPEED RACER was hilarious, ON PURPOSE. Thats the distinct difference between it and T2: WE WUV WOO ROBODADDY. SPEED RACER was also heartfelt and visually stunning; an ultra-psychedelic pop-art explosion of awesome. And you missed it. Too bad! Now back to the basement with you! Mom says dinner is at 5 and you better stop masturbating or you're going to go blind. -
Why it's Bay's fault when a transfomer "pees" on someone as opposed to the writers? Why isn't anyone bitching that Roberto Orci and Alex Kurtzman wrote the worst screenplay ever and that maybe Bay polished their turd? You'd think all you fucks are on the set from start to finish and actually know what's going on. Get over it. If you don't like it, DON'T GO SEE IT. Any movie I hate, I avoid. Any movie you hate, you run out to see so you can bitch about how terrible it is. Let it go, breath in, breath out. Smell that? It's you.... take a shower.
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Ptooey!
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but it just isn't as good an overall film. T2 is a good film- and the Special Effects were groundbreaking, but it is so heavily flawed in the script, and so much of it is fucking groan worthy that it just doesn't measure up to the original. Seriously: "Hasta La Vista, Baby". When I saw it in the cinema I thought that was cool. When I saw it on TV the other day I cringed. Rambo 4, while good, is not as good as First Blood. It just isn't as deep. I liked Rambo 4 but really, First Blood is a stormer. PS- I didn't notice any scares at all in Hannibal- so I probably missed that comparison
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It really was.
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Finally saw it last night, and that has got to be the fastest 90 minutes of film I have ever seen. It just flew by. The gore effects are quite impressive, even when going through them frame-by-frame.
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