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George Clooney will STARE AT GOATS! This actually sounds pretty sweet...

Published at:  May 16, 2008 2:31:39 AM CDT

Ahoy, squirts! Quint here. So, further news out of Cannes. Longtime friends Grant Heslov and George Clooney are working together again, this time with Heslov behind the camera and Clooney in front. The flick is called MEN WHO STARE AT GOATS and is based on Jon Ronson's book about the US Army's First Earth Battalion, which were supposed to have paranormal powers. Hence the title, referring to the belief that a man could kill a goat by staring at it. Mind bullets, The D would call 'em.

Script is by a guy named Peter Straughan, who penned HOW TO LOSE FRIENDS AND ALIENATE PEOPLE... apparently this guy attracts projects with weird titles. Thoughts?




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    Readers Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 2:35:49 AM CDT

    doubt it's true but

    by the podosphere

  • May 16, 2008 2:36:14 AM CDT

    how about that? i was first

    by the podosphere

    how's that dust taste?

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 2:37:29 AM CDT

    Sounds interesting

    by flickchick85

    I wonder how they're gonna approach this type of material. I mean, they wouldn't be totally serious about this, would they?

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 2:58:17 AM CDT

    180 minutes of Clooney staring at goats

    by cuervojones

    I´d buy that for a dollar. Hire Manoel de Oliveira for this!

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 3:01:12 AM CDT

    Bloody Hell! An original idea!

    by biggusdickus

    In Hollywood of all places! THis sounds like quite a cool premise if it's done well; and by 'well', I mean take the source material seriously. No 'cool' Clooney smirking. Play it straight and we could have a war movie with a creepy 'The Fury/The Prestige' kinda vibe running through it.I'm definitely interested!

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 3:01:59 AM CDT

    paranormal powers????

    by annie the pod racer

    This might be cool. I like paranormal powers like Shining with someone else.

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 3:15:31 AM CDT

    More like Scanners than Paycheck?

    by dc films

    I watched Suspect Zero the other night. Not a perfect flick, but the subject matte - Virtual Viewing - is fresh and not relegated to gimmickry. Hope this project doesn't turn 'mind bullets' into a gimmick or macguffin and keeps it's themes at the centre of the story.

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 3:19:30 AM CDT

    i read this

    by g-ride9000

    it will be real good

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 3:21:35 AM CDT

    any moment now...

    by the marquis de side 3

    ...someone will post the first goat joke... =0p

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 3:27:53 AM CDT

    uh...

    by vern

    Gotham Night, you just asked why George Clooney was a celebrity. In my opinion it's because we've seen him in sitcoms since the '80s, he made ER into a huge hit, then made the transition to a leading man in movies, starred in many great films, then became a dependable producer and director, won an Oscar for his acting and was nominated for his writing.
    Which one was his one good one? You could be referring to OUT OF SIGHT, FROM DUSK TILL DAWN, O BROTHER WHERE ART THOU, SYRIANA, GOOD NIGHT AND GOOD LUCK, OCEAN'S 11, MICHAEL CLAYTON, THREE KINGS... I mean come on dude. Plus you didn't even ask what made him a good actor, you just asked why he was a "celebrity." How about because women adore him, men want to be his buddy, he stars in everything and even played Batman one time (even if it was the worst movie ever made). These are a few of the reasons. No, the fact that his most recent movie "tanked hard" does not make him not famous anymore, let alone erase his actual accomplishments.
    If it's gonna be two sentences then make it fuckin count, my friend. I think you can do better and I will not settle for half-assed. Let's see some god damn hustle Gotham Night.

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 3:28:54 AM CDT

    Lots of hilarity in this story

    by pkdkeith

    I read about this a couple years ago.

    The story is ludicrous and should be unbelievable. Clooney's character, some time during the Vietnam War, conceives of a combat armor that has all kinds of goofy pseudoscience in it. The idea was to immobilize the enemy with warmth and kindness, or something. To quell him with hugs. Not dissimilar to the gay-bomb (which was also under development) from 30 Rock's recent season finale.

    And somehow this became the psy-ops part of the military, where you blast captives with Wagner's Rings until he tells you whatever you want.

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 3:32:01 AM CDT

    P.S.

    by pkdkeith

    Oh, and if you haven't seen it, you should all watch "The Pentagon Wars." That should be a pre-requisite before watching this movie.

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 3:39:47 AM CDT

    I have seen Ronson's documentary...

    by wowsah156

    Staring at goats, and i can say its damn well scary. The are military men who have been in walking distance of nuclear bombs and they wanted to create military applications for new age stuff like death stares and walking through walls. If Clooney does this right it will be closer to Ken Russells "Altered States" than a screwball comedy.

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 3:48:47 AM CDT

    This could be great!

    by scruffylooking

    Check out the UK documentary series 'Crazy Rulers of the World' if you get the chance. It aired on Channel 4 a few years back and the goat staring episode was the first one. Crazy shit and a very good book too. Can't see the film being too serious to be honest but it makes you think if they were doing that back then, what are they up to now?

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 4:00:28 AM CDT

    I read the book years ago

    by montimer

    and if it's anything like that then this will be hilarious.

    If it takes the same stance that Ronson did: utter confusion that people actually believe in that by concentrating hard enough they can walk through walls, or make a goat's heart explode simply by staring at it, then this shuld be hilarious.

    There's one section of the book that deals with soliders torturing prisoners by making them listen to Barney the Purple Dinosaur for days on end. I'd love to see that on the big screen. Seriously, that would be the most horrific torture scene in movie history; it would make Saw look like fucking Bambi.

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 4:11:31 AM CDT

    ahahahaha Gotham_Knight

    by spud mcspud

    You got pwned. By Vern! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

    sorry.....

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 4:16:37 AM CDT

    I've read both books...

    by spud mcspud

    HOW TO LOSE FRIENDS... and MEN WO STARE AT GOATS. Let's hope GOATS is more close to the novel than LOSE FRIENDS is, because he hasn't even got the character right! Pegg seems to be playing the same lovable lower-middle class loser he always does as Sid Young, hapless writer/journo in the movie - in the book it's about the Honourable Toby young, who's father is a life peer. Almost certainly upper middle class, if not lower upper class.

    This UK class shit is confusing. Trust me, my Stateside buddies.

    For what it's worth, GOATS the book is both hilarious and terrifying. Funny 'cos it's such a dumbass idea, and terrifying because (a) the US military takes this ridiculous shit seriously enough to go and research with millions of dollars, and (b) WHAT IF THEY MADE IT WORK?!?!? Future wars fought with Scanner battalions and psychic spies who make each other explode by mind power alone in lonely hotel rooms. Imagine THE FURY as a gritty series a la THE WIRE and you're half-way to what this COULD be.

    That's not what the book's like, by the way. The book just outlines what the First Earth Battalion believes, points and laughs at it, and then makes your jaw drop with how much money and research the military put into it. It's beyond batshit crazy.

    Clooney's cool for it. It'll be good.

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 4:24:52 AM CDT

    The book is Hilarious and Scary!

    by filmfunk

    And Clooney I trust to deliver the goods on this one! mix 3 Kings and Dr Strangelove and you've got it!

    Well Done Ronson! you pot smoking freaky dude!

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 4:25:51 AM CDT

    Secret Rulers of the World!

    by scruffylooking

    RighteousBrother - yes that was the other documentary series he did called Secret Rulers of the World. In one episode Ronson follows Alex Jones around as he tries to infiltrate Bohemian Grove. He also meets Harry Shearer, who also attended, afterwards who tells him the event is just one massive frat party! Interesting stuff and very, very wierd!

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 4:27:06 AM CDT

    Fuck Clooney

    by bottombrick

    Before The Coen brothers directed him, everything they made was great. And From Dusk till Dawn is the only awesome thing he has been in. Out of Sight and Three Kings are good, but they don't make up for the rest of the shitstorm. And now that The Coen brothers have made a decent film again, they are still slated to make more Clooney pictures. Oh, and American Solaris sucks ass.

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 4:43:33 AM CDT

    Staring at goats is fine.

    by mrfan

    It's what some people do later to them is what scares me.

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 4:58:05 AM CDT

    Clooney is the Bomb

    by redfist

    I would love to sit at a bar and drink with him.

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 5:31:52 AM CDT

    There was a TV series based on this too

    by thetwat

    It's here:
    http://video.google.co.uk/videoplay?docid=6708686897899858973&q=men+who+stare+at+goats&ei=JmItSKveKYuuigLE-93gCQ

    Very good, although Ronson uses the phrase "America was still bruised by the Vietnam war" a few times too many.

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 5:39:54 AM CDT

    Clooney is ridiculously overpaid

    by jackrabbitslim

    The man's boxoffice clout over the 21st century has been dubious at best. Exactly what blockbuster has he starred in without other A-list help aka The Oceans Series? Leatherheads - flop. Intolerable Cruelty - flop. Good German - flop. Syriana - flop. Good Night and Good Luck - flop. Confessions of a Dangerous Mind - megaflop. Solaris - megaflop. Welcome to Collinwood - flop. The only film that was successful respect to budget was Michael Clayton. My only guess is that Hollywood producers must be tossing millions at him to pick up his sloppy seconds. He is boxoffice poison - a critics darling that makes pretentious films. Get back to the arthouse ghetto where you belong.

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 6:10:52 AM CDT

    Goodnight and Good Luck...

    by gabba-uk

    was one of the best US films I'm the last ten years!!! If you don't think so, then you really are a casualty of the MTV generation. Oh, and you have no sense of good taste either.

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 6:15:04 AM CDT

    Anyone else find Jon Ronson annoying?

    by supertoyslast

    I prefer Louis Theroux myself.

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 6:27:09 AM CDT

    I want a full five-minute sequence of Clooney

    by creasybear

    staring, staring, staring, and then the goat fucking blows up like a Michael Bay explodo-gasm. Cut to shot of Clooney, laying down sniper-style on the edge of the nearby hill, still staring, as bits of roasted goat rain down around him. Camera pans over to a group of generals, led by Sam Elliot. "Welcome to the army." The rest of the movie should be pretty-much a shot-for-shot remake of ZAPPED, with Clooney for Scott Baio.

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 6:27:55 AM CDT

    Grant Heslov was in True Lies

    by kwisatzhaderach

    And pretty funny he was too.

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 6:31:45 AM CDT

    ahhhhh, Zapped

    by gabba-uk

    sorry, getting a rush of nostalga then...

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 7:10:11 AM CDT

    Goats are a menace that must be stopped

    by just pillow talk

    So where'd you go Gotham, any further insights you would like to share?

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 7:17:13 AM CDT

    Fuck Clooney and his uncomfortable pillow

    by karl childers

    I think that's why his head is always tilted.

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 7:28:58 AM CDT

    I have superpowers!

    by abominable snowcone

    I can use telekinetic energy to paralyze, and sometimes kill, goats. Can't do much else, but I can kill those goats.

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 7:30:11 AM CDT

    Karl Childers

    by just pillow talk

    I'm not uncomfortable...really.

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 7:34:59 AM CDT

    Saw a cool documentary on this.

    by knuckleduster

    My favourite is the guy who was convinced he could walk through walls, but could never quite seem to do it. Or the guy who said he killed a hamster with his mind, but wouldn't show how he did it.

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 7:49:42 AM CDT

    Oh...

    by knuckleduster

    Someone said that already.

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 8:15:57 AM CDT

    George Clooney will play George Clooney

    by messi

  • May 16, 2008 8:22:35 AM CDT

    "I DRINK YOUR GOAT MILK!"

    by uncapie

    'I DRINK IT UP!"

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 8:32:54 AM CDT

    that shut gothan knight up pretty quick

    by fleshmachine

    we need more of these OFFICAL calling-people-on-their-shit posts. these boards get too clogged with ass-talking nonsense and non-clever fake movie titles. Clooney is cool and this sounds neat-o.

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 9:35:21 AM CDT

    Sounds DOPE and uber-geeky! Sign Me Up

    by cowboyone

    Clooney will KILL in this. I smell fan-boy franchise. Can't wait to p/u the book.

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 11:04:56 AM CDT

    Ugh

    by malpaso

    There's got to be an end to Clooney-Mania. Does anyone know when that will be? Please? Anyone?

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 11:22:48 AM CDT

    RETURN OF THE KILLER TOMATOES

    by redfang

    ...is George Clooney's best movie. Search your feelings, you know it to be true.

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 11:50:19 AM CDT

    Will it equals to Watching Paint Dries?

    by darthbakpao

  • May 16, 2008 1:58:25 PM CDT

    Very cool book.

    by fiester

    Worth checking out. I'll watch for this flick.

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 2:49:37 PM CDT

    The goats WILL have their revenge

    by dr gregory house

    ala 'The Happening'.

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 4:47:10 PM CDT

    Goat Orgy with George Clooney.

    by mrfan

    Yeah. All the way.

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 5:47:23 PM CDT

    BBC Documentary On "The Men Who Stare At Goats"

    by pockybot

    http://tinyurl.com/56nvmh

    Also, turns out one of the main goat stare/remote viewers trained some of the 9/11 hijackers in Florida. Now that could be a movie!
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ziad_Jarrah#In_the_United_States

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 6:56:17 PM CDT

    All of us should stare at Jason Mewes

    by betaraybill07

    Until his head explodes. I'd love it. Seriously. No one on this earth needs to die more.

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 6:57:19 PM CDT

    Well except..

    by betaraybill07

    Osama. My bad. Although the race isn't as far apart as you might think.

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 6:57:31 PM CDT

    Well except..

    by betaraybill07

    Osama. My bad. Although the race isn't as far apart as you might think.

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 7:15:38 PM CDT

    incorrect, Gotham

    by vern

    I just looked it up. MICHAEL CLAYTON made double its budget in the US alone, that's not including DVDs and what not. So you can't say it "tanked." And by the way what's this obsession with "tanked"? Did you see the fuckin thing? It's a great thriller and Clooney gives one of his best performances. What did you not like about it other than that you imagined that it "tanked"?

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 8:26:56 PM CDT

    If I had to see a movie and someone described this

    by inwosuxred

    as an option, I would probably see it.

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 9:22:16 PM CDT

    I liked Clooney in RETURN TO HORROR HIGH

    by billy goat

    Hey, why is everybody staring at me?I... I'm feeling kind of... >BOOM<

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 10:08:33 PM CDT

    gotham_night

    by badmrwonka

    are you even reading Vern's posts eviscerating you repeatedly?you are making zeron sense, and ignoring any logical arguments against your feeble and nonsensical positions...wait...are you animalstructure in disguise?

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 10:09:06 PM CDT

    zeron = zero

    by badmrwonka

    I typen extran letters sometimesn

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 16, 2008 10:31:33 PM CDT

    gotham night

    by badmrwonka

    you're missing the point. you are making spurious and ridiculous claims, and Vern is refuting them. instead of defending your points, you are ignoring what he writes.so read them again, and defend yourself. or don't, and just give up and admit you don't know what in the holy fuck you're talking about.

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 17, 2008 2:00:13 AM CDT

    Gotham_Skywalker

    by vern

    What is this "same crap over and over again too" that I post? I'm curious. I'm pretty sure this is the first time I had to explain to somebody that George Clooney was famous. So it couldn't be that one.
    And for the record I don't want anybody to bow to me, that would make me uncomfortable. You're acting like a dog mad at its master for putting it outside after it shit on the floor. If you don't like that treatment then stop shitting on the floor.

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 17, 2008 3:42:45 AM CDT

    I care

    by vern

    because I believe you are a human being and if you are then you have the potential to do better than this. No man should live like an animal. When I see somebody passed out on the street I try to help them. And I believe with enough tough love there is an off chance that some day a long time from now even you could have some amount of dignity, no matter how small. Stop selling yourself so short Gotham. I believe it was your boy Yoda who said "there is no try, stop fucking around and DO!"

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 17, 2008 9:48:18 AM CDT

    25 mil budget? From IMDB, the Wikipedia of movies

    by jackrabbitslim

    Aka notoriously incorrect. But be that as it may, which i doubt, that means Clooney was taking - what - 6-8 mil max for a salary (less than half his usual fee) about what he's really worth. He sure as hell aint worth anymore than that. The "I don't care about boxoffice" is the typical facile argument the fanboy who doesnt quite realize or want to grow up and realize making profits=why movies get made. Its why critics' darlings like Werner Herzog, Ken Loach ,etc slog along in the "arthouse ghetto" as Soderbergh once called it. As for Michael Clayton - felt like it was trying too hard to be clever, too smug (like its star)for its own good, a wannabe-hipster's aping of 70's auteurism without Ashby's sense of empathy or even early Friedkin's skills. Not everyone (gasp - how dare they) liked it.

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 17, 2008 11:05:23 PM CDT

    Jack Rabbit

    by vern

    First of all thanks for having an argument and making points, that is all I was trying to get Gotham to do. He's still learning how to think analytically and express himself and what not and I'm trying to help train him.
    But I gotta disagree strongly with your point about box office. Of course everybody realizes that movies are made by companies trying to make a profit. Nobody said they weren't so don't talk to us like we're retards. Yes, "Profits = why movies get made" but they don't equal why they get watched. Or at least not why I watch movies and if you actually watch them because you like to know how profitable they are then yes, now that you mention it, I believe you would be some kind of weirdo or fetishist. I love to eat sweet potatoes but I'm not gonna go to the grocery store and ask how well they're selling. And I hope that if I did that alot they would eventually have me trespassed.
    To put it another way, you didn't like MICHAEL CLAYTON. Did the fact that it made a profit change that? Doesn't sound like it.
    Anyway the only reason it came up is because of Gotham's non sequitur "Michael Clayton was shit on a stick - Clooney couldn't walk away with best actor for that one, and the movie tanked." In his mind the fact that Clooney didn't win the Oscar he was nominated for and the fiction that the movie "tanked" added up to the movie being "shit on a stick." I'm pretty sure he hasn't seen it so I was calling him on that. But it's kind of beside the point anyway since if he saw it he is not yet ready to explain his take on it.
    thanks jack

    Reply to Talkback

  • May 25, 2008 9:29:59 AM CDT

    Clooney up for the "task"

    by bettyjo

    He's been staring at a goat for nearly a year. When she disappears, Goat Action will soar.
    Let's just wait and see if GC can figure this one out for himself.

    Reply to Talkback

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