Cool News
The Director Behind ELECTION and SIDEWAYS To Helm HBO Penis Pilot HUNG!!
I am – Hercules!!
Alexander Payne, who masterminded “Election,” “About Schmidt” and “Sideways,” has signed on to direct the HBO pilot “Hung,” about a high-school coach with a massive schlong.
The series was created by two writers from “The Riches” -- Colette Burson and Dmitry Lipkin.
Read all of Variety’s story on the matter here.


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and first bitches!
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I enjoyed Sideways but I don't know what to think about this news.
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I can't imagine how that premise could sustain *cough* an entire series though. What else is it about?
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i like alexander payne, but i'm on the fence about the premise and the writers. i've seen the first season of the riches, and while i don't hate it, i don't love it... and what's HBO doing greenlighting a show like this anyhow? what's season 2 of HUNG going to be about? "That's right, class, I've STILL got it!" Season 3: The new biology teacher in town has a big secret... in his pants!" I'll catch the pilot, i do for every show, and we'll go from there i guess. good casting would definitely sweeten the pot, though.
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Yep, it'll be bloody HUGE!!!! Hopefully the writing won't be TURGID, but BULGING with wit and THROBBING with energy! And I'm sure given that it's on hbo, it'll run completely UNCUT!!! You'd be NUTS to miss it! One hopes the network suits won't pull a BONER by treating the way they did with DEADWOOD. That'd be just half-COCKed! I love that hbo have the BALLS to TACKLE such edgy material. I'm sure it'll have a LONG run, as long as the writers aren't total DICKS. You'd be an utter KNOB not to tune in!!!!
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I think I'll wait for the female spin-off... "Tight".
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But I'm still not surprised by this.
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Thank you, thank you, I'll be here all week. Try the monkey balls.
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So let's go to dick jokes. Sad state of affairs for creativity nowadays.
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wHo gives a shit channel.
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I enjoyed "Sideways," but I need to know more about this HBO project before I'm onboard. In all honesty, it sounds... creepy.
But with Payne at the helm, I hope it goes someplace interesting. -
It turns out better then Sideways. That movie was painfully too yuppie. About Shit and Election were amazing movies though. I am still amazed that Jack Nicholson didn't win that Oscar. Crazy race that year for best male actors. A bunch of the greats getting beaten out by some newbies. Granted Cooper has been amazing but Brody is shit (though against the odds I liked him in Kong, but that was probably cause of Jackson) and the Penist was a crap movie that everyone ate up because its WWII jew movie, whatever people ate it up.
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Long as HBO is creating more series no one cares about (Unscripted, The Comeback, Fat Actress) why isn't anyone else on here clamoring for Preacher?
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Fat Actress was a Showtime show. Sorry about that, chief.
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...his belly button. That's what they should have called it.
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That movie was great and would make a funny series!
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just sayin
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Seriously, a big-dicked high school coach? This sounds like the worst idea for a tv show outide of a gay porn channel, I've ever heard. This has the potential to make the Sopranos seem like wholesome family fare by comparison.
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Why did it get killed?
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That's the premise?
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Seriously. Fire the entire creative team, execs and all. Start fresh. It can't possibly be any worse than the last few years of crap. The only good show they've put out in years in "Flight of The Conchords" and that's all The Conchords. RIP HBO, indeed.
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do not want to see 12 miles of bad road. maybe the worst show ever made
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i love alexander payne's work, but i really don't think i can comfortably sit with my girlfriend and watch a show whose main plot point is a character's huge cock. it was fine for "boogie nights," but the thought of watching an hour of that gag (no pun intended) every week makes my non-supersized dick shrink like a frightened turtle.
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I've been waiting and waiting over the past year for the announcement and have even written HBO several times about Preacher. After the Wire ended I cancelled my subscription, because it really was their last good show. Showtime has kind of taken over as the pay channel with the best original series. Dexter and Brotherhood alone make it worth the price. Who knows maybe they'll even be smart enough to beat HBO to the punch and pick up Preacher.
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May 09, 2008 10:19:54 AM CDT
I can't believe no one has made an ERECTION joke yet...
by random coolzip
...you guys are falling down on the job!!! ;)
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If the series is good and it develops a loyal following, they will just pull the plug on it, ala Deadwood and Carnivale.
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is supposed to get made by HBO, right? why don't they do that already? there will never be a better time for it, with comic dorks ruling the world and fantasy fanboys frothing.try saying "fantasy fanboys frothing" five times fast.
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Here's why: HBO used to be the home of the greatest shows you could watch on television. OZ, Sopranos, Deadwood, the Wire, Six Feet Under etc. But the last couple of years they've made some bad decisions. ie: John From Cincinnati (great show, but cancelled), Lucky Louie (funniest show I've seen in quite a while, but cancelled), Deadwood ends abruptly even though it's a great show, Carnival is cancelled in what was obviously not supposed to be the end of the story. . . I can go on and on. They need to just pull it back together. HBO just doesn't seem to care about making Sunday nights worth looking forward to anymore. For those of you unfamiliar with Preacher, I'll just say that it would have been a great cornerstone for HBO, but I'm assuming that they already dropped the ball. Anyway back to my original point: I can believe that no one made the erection joke because I for one didn't read the article. I doubt that anyone is interested in reading about a penis show on a has been pay channel that doesn't have good shows anymore.
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Yes...make...now...I love Payne but he did co-write I now pronounce you Chuck and Larry, hopefully he hasn't fully sold out...and Sideways was awesome...ditto Election About Schmidt and Citizen Ruth
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I know Mark Steven Johnson (who may or may not be the right guy for Preacher...Daredevil was much better in the directors cut, Ghost Rider was just ass and Elektra was actually much better than it seemed on first viewing) is in Rome making a movie with Kristen Bell called When In Rome.
Having said that, Garth Ennis is on the series as executive producer (as well as currently writing Constantine 2) so how bad could it be?
Other rumors were that Robert Rodriquez wanted to direct either the pilot or a few of the series episodes.
Last, not least, Grant Morrison's series The Invisibles would be a great acquisition for HBO or Showtime. Morrison said The Matrix (the first movie) was a direct rip off his Invisibles series. Everything we loved about the first Matrix movie came from there, never mind the sequels. Let's go back to the source and make me an Invisibles series that would keep me glued to my TV set. -
would be a great HBO series - drama, sex, war, and all around grim kick-assery. . But instead we get a fat cock. Nice.
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Can't wait for ASS: THE MOVIE or America's Top Hooker.
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If anyone bothered reading the Variety article, it makes the show sound better than Herc describes it, shocker! I have a feeling the main character is going to become a porn star or gigilo to the soccer moms, I have a feeling there looking for a show kind of like Weeds or Breaking Bad, either way we should get lots of nude chicks. HBO still looks very shitty for the forseeable future though, hopefully Entourage comes back strong. And for the guy who thought that Sideways was too yuppie-ish, the whole point of the movie was to show how stupid yuppies and wine snobs are.
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Thanks, I'll be here all week.
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Just as long as it's filled with that typical Alexander Payne type of nudity, then i'll be there!!!
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The best serial drama ever, with one of the most epic and detailed mythologies ever conceived, "because it was too expensive." So that years later they could fashion a show around the premise of a cock. Even straight porn doesn't do that. Well, I guess penile prosthetics are cheaper than deeply immersive character driven period drama. So fail on, HBO.
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You're completely right. You know which other industry builds their narrative around TEH CACK?
Gay porn. -
I mean will it be alluded to but never seen, will it be alluded to and shown briefly as a prostehtic or will they actually try and find a lead actor with a huge cock. And how do you do that, send out casting sheets with "Early 30s, handsome, experience in drama and comedy as must, oh and by the way must have at least a 9" cock, preferably really thick and juicy, must have nice vein profile and be circumcised. And I mean do agents know if their client is packing, cause if that is standard knowledge that is kinda creepy. Or will they hire a lead actor and a stunt cock?
Seriously, inquiring minds want to know... Well actually they would have preferred a series called 'Huge Rack' about a high school teacher with 38DDs, but of course in 2008 that would be demeaning and sexist, unlike a show about a guy whose main attribute is his cock size... -
Would have loved to have been in the room when this douchefest was pitched... "See, it's all about a high school coach...WITH A MASSIVE, OH GOD, STOP ME FROM GOOIN'MYSELF, HUGE, FREAKIN' SCHLONG, AND, AND, AND well, thassit. Whaddya think?"
Hey 'BO - We don't want any more shitty sex shows. Give us quality drama, like Carnivale, 6 feet Under, Deadwood, and Sopranos. Put down the blow, get your collective gayheads outta the closet and quit fuckin' off.
That is all. -
You just went and made the Painless Pole angry.
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"You see, the guy with the huge schlong is a metaphor for Jesus Christ. He will have his followers, and those who will want to bring him down..."HBO executives nodding, as though in deep thought..."Yes....I see...."
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I think Grant Chastain gonna sue somebody.
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Is there an intentional move away from high quality and towards "edgy"? A show about a guy with a big cock? Give me a fucking break!
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Because he's a high school coach, there will be some kind of reference to "To Catch a Predator"
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Preacher will save Sundays for you HBO. Showtime, scoop it if you can.
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"Milton Berle Story", or the "Andy Dick Saga"...
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This sounds like the start to a joke...
So this gym teacher has a huge penis... -
It went nowhere. It said nothing. And it was deathly dull. Can we please - FOR FUCK'S SAKE - quit it with the whining about its cancellation some three years now after its demise? It ain't coming back. So, seriously, just move on.
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to AMC and Showtime, and the awesome shows for which they stand.
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steve gutenberg will "head" up the lead role in this project...he's got an an exhaust pipe in his jeans.
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My guess is that he uses his asset to be a suburban gigolo to soccer moms. That could end up being interesting, ala Breaking Bad. If they develop the client characters well, it could also have a tad of what makes Big Love a decent show.
I must say HBO's marketers couldn't have found a stupider way to describe this. Without more information, big dick plus gym class teacher is going to equal pedophile to most people. -
The kid is hospitalized with internal injuries due to the dick whipping?
Seriously, sounds like a flimsy premise for anything other than a porno (straight or gay). -
Dancing With The Stars? He kept tripping over his third leg?
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Yes, I can see how someone would think season 1 sucked because it was slow and really nothing much happened. But I guarantee you if you actually stuck through it to the end of season 2, you would have been blown away
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May 09, 2008 3:01:26 PM CDT
"Hey coach, is that a tetherball in your pants or are you just h
by ruedbaga
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I agree with you; however, after having read his post, it's obvious to me that even if he had watched season 2 that it would have been a bit too complicated of a story for his level of intelligence.
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a.k.a. Soul Vengeance - anyone see this? It was about a brother who kills people with his massive dick. Sadly it doesn't deliver on it's awesome premise (it's pretty slow) but the music is stony and weird.
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You are wrong.
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Just when I thought HBO hit rock bottom.
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Even though they seem pretty washed up lately....
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Does he urinate acid??? Ejaculate projectile bullet-speed semen??? Or just fuck everything in sight, and rip it apart?? How do you kill people with a massive dick, outside of bludgeoning?
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Did a IMDB search of Soul Vengeance which does indeed involve a released convict with a lethal penis. And what did IMDB suggest 1st for "if you liked that" viewing? You guessed it....Shaft.
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May 09, 2008 4:42:28 PM CDT
From HBO, the network that brought us The Sopranos, Rome, Carniv
by c4andmore
oh how the mighty have fallen. No thanks, I'll pass
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compared to HBOs efforts of late, Carnivale is the fucking Godfather. I mean, it's just sad, so so fucking sad.
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Not a big fan of Kathy Bates' tits?
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If "racy" and "shock value" means "quality". So over this network. Besides Curb it's WELL past its prime.
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No one ever talks about it here, but it is just excellent. C'mon, this is easily the best cast show on TV right now: Harry Dean Stanton, Bruce Dern, Chloë Sevigny, Grace Zabriskie... Hell-Ooohhhh!?! Best thing Bill Paxton's ever done, too. Like Weeds and The Sopranos, Big Love is also about outlaws trying to live the American Dream in all of its glory. Themes of marriage and money are dominant in all three series, and while Big Love is not as loopy as Weeds or as grizzly as Sopranos, it is more coherent and consistantly hits high marks for both humor and drama. Check it out, people!
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Witness that you have to point out it even exists. It's a quieter show than even Six Feet Under was (though not as quiet as The Wire, a.k.a. the best show ever no one actually watched). I'll look at it if it's on but it's nothing to get excited about, nothing groundbreaking going on there, nothing people even talk about. It's just sort of there.
I just don't understand where and how HBO went so fucking wrong creatively and it really pisses me off because it was once the role model for successful, independent, cutting edge serial programming. Now its idea of a show is a dick joke.
Why? Why? Why? Are they just cheap? Is that it? This show sounds cheap to make. The last few shows they've tried have been cheap looking. Not a lot of special effects or big production values in a shrink's office. I heard part of the reason Rome was not back was because they did not want to pay for it--so are financial concerns playing a role in their decision making now? I don't know. -
I can't buy into the concept that 3 attractve and intelligent women would be 'ok' with being married to teh same guy. I'm not saying it doesn't happen irl, but certainly not with the characters the show provides us with.
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Way back up top.
"Hard show to pull off!"
Instant classic. Know that I’ll probably remember that for the rest of my life.
As for HUNG.
I'm sure it'll wind up being a fascinating character study etc - the guy has the credentials for such a take - that will receive unhealthy amounts of praise. The life of someone who views himself very differently to everyone else and tries to make sense it all day after day - but why about a dick? Why not a guy who had his hand lopped off?
Cos it's always about the dick with those guys. -
Man, HBO turbo boosted that shark. I wonder if this "new direction" is a result of HBO losing Carolyn Strauss in a management shake-up, who was some president or another and who was specifically responsible for nurturing some of the network's best shows during it's Sunday night heyday.
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i dont like the tudors, but many others do...but with shows like weeds, this american life (brilliant doc series), dexter, and that hot lesbo show...it seems showtime is the place to be...its still beyond me that hbo turned down mad men...what dumb fucks
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Call your doctor you mat be severely mental.
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Please tip your servers generously.
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Son comes home from school and says
"Dad, the swim teacher told us to jump off the high board today and I was really scared and I couldn't jump."
Dad says "Son did you do it?"
Son says "then the teacher said, "Boy if you don't jump, I'm gonna stick my twelve inch cock up your ass!"
Dad- "Well, son did you jump?"
Son- "A little bit.... at first."
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The gym teacher has a crush on one of the english teachers. Problem is he gets an erection every time he sees her. Not wanting to be embarassed on their first date, he ties his penis around his right leg. He goes to her front door to pick her up. She answers it. He kicks her square in the face. Hilarity ensues!
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On a network that used to give us shows like Oz, The Wire, Deadwood, Six Feet Under, The Sopranos, Rome, Carnivale, Band Of Brothers, From The Earth To The Moon, The Larry Sanders Show, Tales From The Crypt, Extras, The Corner, and even John From Cincinnati, all we've really got left from that era of HBO quality is now is Entourage, Curb Your Enthusiasm and Big Love, and, while all quite entertaining, none of those are exactly remarkable tv in the old HBO way. And for every rare treat on HBO these days, like John Adams, or, with a bit of luck, the upcoming Generation Kill and next year's The Pacific, we get crap like this, or In Treatment, or Tell Me You Love Me, or yet another crappy HBO reality show. Showtime really is the new king of cable these days.
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He has a 10-inch cock! When he sits on the toilet, it touches the water!
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I moved to LA 2 and a half years ago and after dating a few women here, I'm convinced that the number of small penises in Hollywood is well above the natural average. That's why this town is full of overachieving womanizers. They're all trying to prove to themselves deperately that size doesn't matter. It's a town full of small dicks trying to compensate with BMW's and arrogant attitudes. This whole town has penis envy, I swear. It's funny as shit!
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I know my subject will get cut, so: Would it be racist if the guy was played by a black actor?
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Sideways.
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but this sounds stupid
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Did you stab the Hollywood turd burglars in the mouth with your #2 pencil?
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