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Harry's DVD Picks & Peeks - 1st week of May DVDs: Bob Dylan, Tornadoes, Vagina Dentata, THE CAR, Evil Children and Bollywood! +
Hey folks, Harry here… Sorry this was a day late, but I pulled a muscle in my back and really didn’t feel right writing. Sucks – I know… but it’s feeling much better now. This week isn’t the most amazing – but next week is the shit - especially if you love vintage films like me. As always the box art and titles are linked to the titles’ Amazon pages where you can learn more about the title – or you can purchase, thus supporting this column. I hope you dig it. I’m working on next weeks already!
Tuesday, May 6th, 2008
I’M NOT THERE
I love Todd Haynes – and I love I’M NOT THERE! It isn’t a straight Bob Dylan biopic… never pretends to be. The multiple performers playing Bob are amazing – and while Cate Blanchett does indeed still the show – who doesn’t love Heath Ledger’s turn? Or Christian Bale’s? Or Julianne Moore’s “Joan Biaz/Alice”? This didn’t get nearly the theaters, or the attention I would have hoped for. This was easily one of the most fiercely original and wonderful films of 2007. If you haven’t seen it, seek it out.
TWISTER (Blu Ray)
In the first year of AICN – there was this film called TWISTER. I like TWISTER, but then I lived in Tornado Alley up in North Texas… had repeated Tornado drills. But I never did see an awesome bit of Tornado horror. But TWISTER solved that. The visual fx and sound design on this film are absolutely fantastic. Now – I’m not the biggest fan of Helen Hunt’s performance here… but I love Bill Paxton! But as I was watching the film on BluRay the other day – I completely forgot how awesome the cast was for this. Like Philip Seymour Hoffman’s character – who is extreme. Or Cary Elwes’ bastard. Or Jeremy Davies or Lois Smith. The film has so much talent… and fucking flying cows. Did I mention FLYING COWS!?!?!?! How can you not love FLYING COWS? The disc has new interviews with stars and talent talking about the making of the film and their memories about it. They’ve done a very nice job with this disc.
MYSTERY SCIENCE THEATER 3000: THE MOVIE
I have a noted history of not liking and actually hating this show. You have to understand – I like the robots, I like their banter… it’s the concept of belittling movies and declaring certain films as being TERRIBLE STINKERS – that I can’t stand. And never was the case more infuriating to me, than with the theatrical version of MST3KTM…. The film is THIS ISLAND EARTH… literally one of the very best 50’s Science Fiction films… With fantastic aliens from the same planet as Dennis Muren… and Apple technology… and Metaluna Mutants… and art deco Saucers… tractor beams, triangular two way televisions with built in lasers! And I just love the film. I grew up with it. Since this film came out… I’ve attempted to see THIS ISLAND EARTH twice in theaters and both times there were jackasses screaming out quotes from this version of the film and laughing hysterically. FUCK THAT! Now – the humor is funny – but my problem with this and the series is that while I love that tons of awesome genre films that could have been forgotten were discovered via the show… BUT – now they got introduced to those films as “trash cinema” and not the films that they were – prior to self-aware ironic glib humor. I really wish that the guys behind the MST3K phenom – had made their own films – their humor was solid enough to not just be a video commentary added to another’s film.
TEETH
This film kicks so much ass it isn’t funny. Actually it is funny – and you’ll never insert anything inside a pussy without flashing to some scenes from this film. It isn’t nearly as graphic as you would think, but is… at the same time, incredibly graphic. Jess Weixler is amazing in the film. Really and truly somebody to watch. And then the rest of the cast works well too. Mitchell Lichtenstein’s debut directorial film is a winner – and has all the markings of becoming one of the great date horror films of all time. It’s sexy, naughty and unforgettably worth sinking your teeth into! Definitely check this out!
SAAWARIYA
I love Bollywood cinema – it makes me giggle and feel like a 14 year old school girl – and for an enormous and hairy geek – that’s an amazing experience. SAAWARIYA is beautiful, funny, emotional, musical, scary and well… like all Bollywood movies – it has a little of everything – and… HOLY SHIT – it’s in BluRay. If you want a film to show off the beauty of 1080p… this is a title to unleash on your unsuspecting friends. And dudes? Girls love Bollywood – even if they don’t know it yet!
THE CAR
Do you love killer car movies? This is the gold standard, by which to compare all others. THE CAR is super genius. It’s about 100 times more awesome than CHRISTINE or MAXIMUM OVERDRIVE could ever aspire to be. THE CAR is eight shades of badass – and there is shit that happens in this fucking movie that you’ll scream, “HOLY SHIT” at – repeatedly. It’s basically an evil car that can’t be destroyed… and will fucking kill you, the person to your left, the person to your right… and all the rest of the people in the 50 mile proximity of you. You do not fuck with THE CAR. THE CAR will fuck up KITT. THE CAR would destroy AIRWOLF. THE CAR makes the Atom Bomb seem like a fucking firecracker… and I’m not talking about the dangerous kind. I’m talking about those fireworks that have a string at either end and you pull and it goes a disappointing snap… instead of boom. THE CAR is THE CAR. You need to get out of its way you pansy ass bitch!
HIYA KIDS! A 50’S SATURDAY MORNING BOX
Ya know… I often times wish I grew up in the 1950’s. I really want to be 11 in 1957 – but I don’t want to be around for the draft a decade later. But man… Movies were miracles, TV had cowboys and puppets and Atomic Train Sets – and amazing space gear – and the future had limitless possibilities – and you knew when you grew up that you’d have a jetpack and you’d have the ability to play football on the moon. Well – this 4 disc set is FILLED with a sampling of everything you’d want a sample of… if you were a kid of the fifties. For a rundown on everything on this set – check out the Amazon link. It’s excessive and necessary. Especially for Nostalgia junkies like me!
COLLECTION OF 2007 ACADEMY AWARD: NOMINATED SHORT FILMS
Here ya go! You can finally see what all the hub bub was all about. The 3 animated nominees are genius. And the Live Action shorts are outstanding. If you didn’t catch the theatrical run of these – this is the only way you’ll see more than those tiny clips you see at the Oscars. That said – it’s completely worth every penny. Great stuff.
MACON COUNTY LINE
One of the great White Trash Grindhouse films of all time. If you love films like the original WALKING TALL series and JACKSON COUNTY JAIL – well this movie is for you! While never a critic fave – this is a film that too often finds itself in film rating books at 2 1/2 stars – but really – nobody actually saw it. Cuz if you saw this film, you’d know that it absolutely fucking owns! It’s a story of 3 folks basically entering the wrong county at the exact wrong time – and getting royally screwed over for that mistake. Wonderful film!
HOTTIE & THE NOTTIE
One of the worst films in the history of films. Like a kick to the balls followed by a rubbing alcohol douche. It stings and burns and fucking shits between your eye and a contact lens. However, if pain is your thing – and you’ve nailed your cock to a 2x4… don’t attempt this. It hurts more.
LEGEND OF BRAVESTARR – THE MOVIE
Because – BRAVESTARR kicked ass! And you need to refresh your memory. Sci fi Cowboy, living skeletons, robots, cows, magic, monsters, fucking dragon, quasi druggie shaman and so much more. Bravestarr rules!
DEVIL TIMES FIVE
Are you scared of evil fucking children? This is the movie you’ve been waiting for. Essentially you have a story about 5 kids that escape, essentially, Arkham Asylum, but Batman doesn’t catch them – and they fucking get LORD OF THE FLIES on a group of rich dumbshits that these kids are going to kill. Some idiot reviewed this film on Amazon – but really is clueless. DEVIL TIMES FIVE is one of the best EVIL KIDS ON THE LOOSE films. It’s very WRONG and EVIL. It’s pure 70’s Exploitation glee – and nobody exploited kids into evil fucks – quite like adults of the 70s that knew us 70s kids were evil, dangerous and capable of being adult killing machines. This is the movie that really proves it.
Next week we’ll be looking at the new DVD set of the Indiana Jones films, LION THE WITCH AND THE WARDROBE on BluRay, SHINOBI, SNL Season 3, MASTER & COMMANDER (BluRay), Fox Western Classics, Classic Sci-Fi Ultimate Collection, RAISIN IN THE SUN, BUTCH CASSIDY & THE SUNDANCE KID in Blu Ray, a proverbial shitload of Frank Sinatra films, MAN OF THE WEST, AUTISM THE MUSICAL, THE SECRET OF SANTA VITTORIA, THE LOVERS – Criterion, GUNFIGHT AT DODGE CITY, THE BIG TRAIL, THE FIRE WITHIN – Criterion, THE WAY WEST, YOUTH WITHOUT YOUTH, LA CHINOISE, THE SECRET INVASION and much much more!!!
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check out his band on youtube, Martini Ranch.. fucken awsome -
I had forgotten that one. It was pretty fucking scary when I was a young lad.
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Teeth is the porn of the week? in a sick, pussy bites cock off fedish kind of way.
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I can't believe they're finally re-releasing the Mystery Science Theater 3000 movie on DVD! Copies of the last print were somewhere in the neighborhood of $80 bucks. Yeah, they had to slow down some of the jokes, but come on! Best pick of the week by far. By FAR.
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I don't know where to start with Bollywood films. I am interested, but don't know any directors or actors or anything. Also, if anyone could give me a list of Bollywood films that would be a good start, please start with ones that I might be able to find at Blockbuster. Once I'm into them and fully interested, then I can go searching others out.
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May 07, 2008 6:51:09 AM CDT
Wow you are actually defending the "films" of MST3K?
by charles_corkey_thatcher
This Island Earth was classic 50's Sci-Fi, but it is also goofy as hell. The weren't mean to the film, they just poked some fun at its weaker points. Seriously where is the harm in that. It's like you want to dry hump every movie that ever existed when, in reality, 90% of the movies made actually suck. If you have convinced yourself otherwise that's fine, but don't take it out on a show that was actually high quality. It makes you look silly.
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I think you would be doing a very good service by laying off of MST3k after this post. I'm glad you've defended your dislike a little more tastefully this time rather than the last time in which you lit the fire under a mass of gaseous ubernerds. I love "This Island Earth," and have a VHS copy of both the Mystied version and the original.
I love both. -
For the most part I can only remember the movie Vaguelly, I probably havent seen this thing arond 23-25 years..but what I do remember is that one of my childhood crushes Kim Richards (much cuter and talented than her famours niece) was in it.. Bring on The Witch Moutain Remake (yes I know she was in Black Snake Moan)
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ten times better than He-Man!...um it helps if you're baked. Devil Times Five is very low budget but pretty decent direction, and very twisted machinating little kids! I partly agree about what you said about MST3K, but without it I wouldn't have been exposed to a to a lot of great films. I prefer the days of Joel instead of Mike, and the MST3K movie sucked.
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You'd be about 62 years old now. Think about it that way.
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Shit Harry, I thought you were recommending the film for a second there. I'd rather stick my dick in a vagina dentata than Paris Hilton's diseased crotch.
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...This Island Earth in its uncommented form as bonus feature. I think that was a great idea. Got no idea if the US DVD hast the same.
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That movie along with Demons was the ultimate stuff of nightmares for this kid.
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Although, I wouldn't be surprised when Hollywood tries to remake this, too. Watch for it.
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That movie completely freaked me out as a kid. A pretty good cast and they played it completely straight. A movie about a killer demon car could have been just another cheesy monster movie but it really worked for me .
The scene where the cops think they are the ones chasing the car and find out too late that they are the ones being hunted was pretty scary. But the part of the movie that really freaked me out however was the car blowing right though a house to kill a women without even stopping or slowing down destroyed any sense of safety I had watching the movie in my living room at the time. -
And now, Teeth will probably do the same and make me wish I was gay.
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Please whatever you do, don't start your Bollywood experience with Saawariya! there are far better movies bollywood has made
Try and watch Taare Zameen Par or Rang De Basanti , some of the better films to come out of bollywood in recent years... -
That's some funny shit, man.
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a teen sex comedy. What wacky hijinks will her vagina dentata get into this time? Will the high school principal expel her for castrating him? Not if she gets a 1600 on the SATs!
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How dare anyone attack cinematic treasures like "Space Mutiny," "Red Zone Cuba," and "Alien from LA" -
Anyone remember that one? Kind of like The Car meets Duel.
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As far as I'm concerned, Saawariya isn't my kind of movie. Of course, it is beautiful and performances are competent but somehow, the director Sanjay Leela is always too melodramatic for my taste.
The bollywood movies I enjoyed are the 2 movies in 'Munna Bhai' series. If you're into somewhat serious movies then watch "U, Me Aur Hum" or "Taare Zameen Par".
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I was afraid the only thing worth renting this week was going to be teeth. Two Hooah's on two.
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The absolute worst part is when they're all having a jolly, spirited lunch with that old lady. She asks what an F5 tornado is, and everyone suddenly goes very quiet and deadly serious, and they answer her in hushed tones. Oh God, what a shit film!
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...until the 2nd tornado (not counting the one in the prologue, where Helen Hunt's dad dies). Then it's just the same "Look, a Tornado! Follow it! Oh no, we're too close, run away!" like 6 or 7 times.
But the F/X still hold up pretty well. -
I thought Twister was a decent popcorn movie. It made meteorology fun. Our local weatherman up in Indiana felt like a badass that summer, as if the movie was all about him.
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Jan DeBont's last watchable movie, and the special effects are pretty impressive even after all this time. What IS up with the box art for Teeth? I seem to recall when it was released it was promoted as an almost-horror film. Now it looks like a remake of Chatterbox. Wonder if Juno has anything to do with the marketing...hmmmmmmm. And let me join in the chorus of Misties who think you are way off base, Harry. That show gave new life to possibly the worst of all time, even besting Ed Wood's work, the immortal "Manos, Hand Of Fate". EW even did a lengthy write up on that, due in no small part to Mystery Science.
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they host them on rifftrax and rifftrax has become a phenomenal value additive for many of my old movies.
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Is DELIRIOUS really good? I saw it somewhere and wondered wtf it was.
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I have always hated MST3K. The worst part about that show was how it gave birth to the annoying culture of "riffing" during any slow point in a movie. I think that shit is more annoying that a marathon viewing of The Hottie and the Nottie! Fuck MST3K!
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guess that saves me a trip to the comic store (ok, obvious joke, but needed to be said)
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They digitally replaced Helen Hunt w/ Ellen Barkin in Twister!!! And yes, it was such a shitty film. Philip Seymour Hoffman's memory of that performance shouldn't be too much more unpleasant than one of getting caught jerking off by his Mom.
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Is it possible you could use your name and clout to get Criterion to say something about releasing movies on bluray, i would love to see 7 samuria in 1080p, thanx
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May 07, 2008 9:31:48 AM CDT
I have a noted history of not liking and actually hating this sh
by broseph
Guess the check didn't clear?lol jk i've heard rumors about this site any thruth to it?
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...MST3K ever did. Everything else ranged from amusingly dated to horrendously, retina-scarring awful. Yeah, it sucks when you're sitting down to the latest Batmasn or Spider-Man movie, and there's some 15-year-old tool adding his own running commentary a few rows back, but taling at the movies existed LONG before MST3K. What's genius about the show is how they always came up with the best quips, while watching bad movies at home with your buds usually only results in variations on "this sucks".
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...you miss the point. Joel, Mike, and all the MST3K gang are CINEPHILES just like yourself. If you watched MST3K for any extended amount of time, you would pick up on the metric assloads of references to actors, movies, famous quotes, etc. Seriously, half of my movie/TV education comes from having to look up some of the names they throw out in the theater. These guys watch a ton of film, and seriously, who would've even SEEN shit like "Boggy Creek" or "Mitchell" if it wasn't for Mystery Science Theater?
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Osmosis - They did Diabolik as their last episode, and that's equally as enjoyable to me as the MSTied version (if not more so).
The mention of Space Mutiny earlier, though... *heh*
THICK MCRUNFAST! -
I'll check out your suggestions.
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Henry Jones Sr hit the nail on the head.
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I wish they released the made-for-tv sequel to The Car as well... Killdozer! Gotta check if a dvd of that exists.... they both rule!
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"It’s the concept of belittling movies and declaring certain films as being TERRIBLE STINKERS – that I can’t stand." Am I wrong in thinking that you run a website where you and your friends declare movies to be terrible stinkers every single day?
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Sorry, but the rest of the thread went out of my head after reading that. Yeahhh Babeh!
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but she almost killed I'm Not There for me. It just seemed so mannered and painfully self conscious. I know I'm alone on this one.
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master and commander is a kirk & spock movie in disguise... and that's why I love it so much.
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I would think you were completely nuts if you didn't at least like Crow and Tom Servo.
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I have to point out here that not all of us share your...diverse tastes. A lot of the films MST3K ripped into really were terrible, terrible movies (or at least terrible American edits/dubs of movies), and while I think "This Island Earth" has its virtues...it hasn't aged well and the guys are just saying what a good chunk of the audience is THINKING.
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...that they sometimes just made fun of movies, not because they were bad, but because they were OLD! Making fun of 20 - 50 year old special effects isn't really what I would call "ingenious", even if the joke is funny.
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It is a movie with evil corprate weather chasers. Seriously evil meteoroligists.
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In other news, hysterical shows like Mystery Science Theater shouldn't exist because we cannot trash (trash) cinema. But then scroll down and we find, "One of the worst films in the history of films." Soooo why is it okay for you to make that judgment but not the boys at Mystery Science Theater?
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Can't blame you, but I honestly don't believe you have watched the Hottie and the Nottie. For if you did, Harry, you would surely have been awarded the nobel peace prize for your sacrifice. Fess up now.
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"Da da dada da da/ It's the Braak Show/Starring me/I'm Brak!/It's the Brak Show and I've got lots of good guests...." That had me in stitches the first time I saw it!
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Do you ever have the ability to step back from your geekdom and lighten the fuck up a little? If you were able to you would be able to appreciate the humor these guys add to a seriously dated SciFi movie. I like the movie to, but you can't deny that at times it’s utterly ridiculous and, at times, even comical on its own (without trying).
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A co worker has been hounding me to see The Car for YEARS now. Maybe I should finally check it out. I hope it isn't over-hyped. Ins't it rated PG??
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Holy shit but I love this movie in the most guilty of guilty-pleasure kinda way. James Brolin in full on "Ammityville Horror"/"Prophecy" caveman look...a totally kick ass evil Car that can absolutely crash right through your living room and obliterate you without even slowing down (best scene in whole movie). That incessant honking and the scene where the car is stopped and Brolin approaches it and the door opens...then slams shut right as he gets close enough to see "who" is driving. No answers and no purpose. Just evil death on wheels. Since I first got my learner's permit I've wanted my very own "The Car" so I can speed through friendly neighborhoods smashing pussified speedbumps and honking nonstop my evil horn and chasing pee-wee baseball kids around. No...I don't actually want to run somebody over again and again even if they are a kid...it's messy after all...but the idea of chasing a little-league baseball team with a big giant black demon car with a horror-horn is just pure fun for all involved.
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or is it a joke I don't get?
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What about the DVD release of the new Avatar: Last Airbender installment?
...that includes episodes that won't air on Nickelodeon until July. -
he was a soap opera writer who gets transported to a world full of his charectors. and eddie murphy also did a comedy special called delirious in the 80's. i might be wrong.
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You defend old B-movie fare like This Island Earth (hardly high culture cinema), saying that MST3K belittles a film you think is great because you grew up with it. Then you slam The Hottie and the Nottie (and trust me, I'm in no way, shape, or form defending that film). But couldn't someone justify their love for such junk by saying "well I grew up with this Paris Hilton film! Because of that, it kicks ass!" Nostalgia is a band-aid. If you can wipe away nostalgia and still find a good film underneath, then that's a film worth loving. If you just like a film because of the good times it makes you remember, you're not really liking the film at all; you're thinking about your childhood and not the film. Case in point: I loved Hook when I was a kid. Watched that shit over and over again. Now when I try to watch it I see it for the overall abortion it is (there are some inspired moments, of course...it is Spielberg after all). If I blindly loved every film now that I loved when I was a kid, hell, I'd be defending Batman Forever, ID4, Goonies, etc. And, well, those films range from mediocre to just plain awful. However there are some great movies you see when you're a kid that, upon seeing them with adult eyes, you see they still kick ass. Movies like Jurassic Park, Star Wars, Raiders, Die Hard, Who Framed Roger Rabbit, etc. I watched Who Framed Roger Rabbit so much as a kid that our old vhs tape is unwatchable. But I bought it on DVD a few years back, wondering if it held up and I'll be damned if that isn't one of my absolute favorite films of the 80's. Anyway, I've gone off on a bit of a rant here, but to make a long story short ('too late!'), nostalgia does not a good film make.
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Oh god, but she has her teeth in the wrong place. I don't know if I could. I really don't know...Oh hell, she's cute. Yeah I could.It's tough being a guy sometimes.
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Caught "Inside" last night and have got to say, with this title and High Tension, the French sure love their bloody violence with sharp utensils...ouch!!
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Seriously I've seen Harry defend some real crap just because he has a soft spot for the project or the material. Enthusiasm is no substitute for quality. Besides most of the crap Mystery Science Theater mocks is pretty awful no matter what time period they're in.
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best movie coming out this week. master and commander? are they going to make any more of those? shitty cliffhanger ending ruined it for me.
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Bollywood movie you will ever need to see. Everything else is chopped liver compared to it. I'm serious, I've seen quite a few Bollywood movies and they are all ruined because of this one.
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Wasn't that supposed to get reviewed? No bigfoot-yeti loving?!
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You're not going to find any good Bollys at Blockbuster, if you can find any at all; Netflix won't be much help either. To find a decent selection of Bollywood films you're going to need to hunt down your local Indian grocery/video store and rent from them. Recommended viewing to start with: Kuch Kuch Hota Hai, Kabhi Khushi Kabhie Gham, Mohabbatein, Dilwale Dulhania Le Jayenge, Veer-Zaara, Umrao Jaan, the Dhoom films if you want some Hollywood action explosion excess, and if you want some older titles look for Teesri Manzil, Don (1978 version with Amitabh Bachchan), Sholay, and The Great Gambler.Actors/Actresses to look for: Shahrukh Khan, Kajol, Rani Mukherjee, Preity Zinta, Salman Khan, and with few exceptions you can never go wrong with Amitabh Bachchan.Anyway, start there and then ask the people working the counter to recommend some others, or just branch out looking for names and faces you recognize. Good luck.
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High five.
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Two perfectly good guilty pleasure movies. The last pressing of "Twister" on DVD had a great DTS track, I wonder if it made it to this new pressing. But "The Car"? Saw this on television way back when I was a kid in the 80's, and it pops up on the Sci Fi channel every now and again. Can't wait to get my hands on this DVD. Thanks for alerting me to its presence.
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I know about a Joan Baez, is it possible Dylan dated two girls with almost exactly the same name, and I don't know about the other one?!?!?!?!
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i saw "The Car" parked in the Universal Studios backlot in like '79. i was on the tour tram and almost jumped off just to go stand next to it.
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i guess.
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Quite a revelation. All I have heard so far is people whining about melodramatic Bollywood movies can get, and cabbage plots...
P.S Stay away from Bollywood movies mimicking Hollywood special FX (i.e. DHOOM, RACE, etc.) unless you want to laugh at their attempts. -
"about *how* melodramatic"
Harry, you f***ing couch potato, get us an edit button, you redheaded nincompoop. -
it makes him look like a joke. They justifiably make fun of the same unwatchable films that Harry "Loves" and "Kick Ass".
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You're getting the wrong vibe. Mike, Joel, and the Robots loved those old movies. Let me refer you to the final episode: Mike and crew finally escape the Satellite of Love and make their way to Earth. What do they do? Hang around Mike's apartment and watch crappy old movies. Of their own free will. You can tease things you love.
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Was it a demon with horns or something?
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That cartoon is almost on a level with Thundercats, I dunno what the film is about, I'm sure its good but i want the whole series on dvd!
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for the movie they couldnt pick the movies they do for the show, they at least had to make the movie somewhat good for the thaeter audience, they said it themselves. also i am probably the only person to love the show and equally love the movies on that said show. yes they rip em apart and i laugh, but then i own many of the movies themselves on dvd and trust me when theyre good the jokes dont even enter my head.
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I get where Harry is coming from. Films are his passion and vocation. He hates people unfairly ripping on them. For the same reasons, I hate lawyer jokes with an absolute passion.
That said, I acknowledge that some lawyer jokes are pretty funny, as long as they're not too hateful. I'd encourage Harry to acknowledge the same about some of the MST3K commentary jokes. Also, just as some lawyers probably deserve scorn, so some films are deserving of ridicule.
I actually enjoy the MST3K jokes AND I enjoy some of the films they rip on as standalone films. You CAN have it both ways, Harry. It is possible.
Lastly, this is my first ever attempt at paragraph breaks. Hope it worked... -
Just curious. It came out this week too and seems like something you'd wanna see. I bought it today, sight unseen, just based on the positive word I've seen on sites like Bloody-Disgusting. Just wanted to see what your take on it was.
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and they obviously love the movie. It can be done if you don't take it so seriously.
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What a prick, both on screen and off. Can't stand him! Shahruk Khan (a different Khan) is very popular in more recent Bollywood films (including my favorite - DDLJ). He overacts tremendously, but has a certain weird likability. I can't explain it.
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..Galaxy Rangers> Seriously, what the fuck is bravestar? It sounds like one of Filmations last attempt at surviving the American animation scene.Never heard of the Car, but I doubt it was better than JC's Christine.Teeth sounds like fun, hopefully it's not as bad as that other indie chick horror film called May.
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I was lucky to be a projectionist at a third rate movie house so we got THE CAR first run : ) I got to watch it like 3 times a day for 2 weeks. I love THE CAR. HONK, HONK, HOOOOOONK!
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You put the action figures on some platform and when you shot it with a Bravestarr laser blaster the figure would fall off!
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"the car" was boring movie and isnt a miligram as badass as Christine..not to mention the car itself. Christine is a beautiful car and is worth buying the dvd just to get a look at the car alone, but has alot more: great performances, awesome score and soundtrack, a hotass kelley preston, on top of that John carpenter directing a stephen king novel!
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than the one in This Island Earth.
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but galaxy rangers is out and thats completely awesome. star wars meets the wild west in space.
twister sucks. -
that we dnt know existed. i have a mind of my own, i canlike a film and think its good, that mst3k tells me is a piece of shit, i'm just happy that they give me a chance to catch half ofhem or i'd never know they even existed. like mitchell and all the others.
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Actually like these kind of films. I'd rather take the unwanted side effect of kids making horrendusly unfunny jokes at the movies, then the side effects of all of the modern day horror/sci fi directors and writers who talk so much about how they're fans of the source material and love these types of movies, then produce horrendous remakes and ripoffs (I'm looking at you, Paul WS Anderson)
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Well of course I won't spoil it duh. Seriously, it's highly worth checking out...going to be a purchase for me.Speaking of which...anyone know who did the work on the Car? It looks like they started with a lincoln continental and then totally modded the body. Those headlights are still the kewlest and creepiest I've ever seen on a car. And yes...HONK HONK HONK HONK HONK HONK HONK!! HHOOOONNKKK!! I've always wanted that exact horn too...scare the living shit out of aimless pedestrians (gotta be careful tho...dust a geezer and you could be up for involuntary manslaughter! ouch!)
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I've owned this one on DVD for years, and it's a very nice transfer... but is this one a new transfer? A freaking great time. And I saw The Car on the Universal tour around the same time; it looked so dang *small* parked there, all dusty and sad looking.
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Seriously Harry - crap. You know, it's fun to like movies that make you feel like a kid experiencing the joy of cinema, but grow up dude. Sometimes movies just suck and trying to find some nugget of childlike wonder about flying cows is just stupid.
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If not, why even put it on your list?
And no love for Avatar? -
...your "beloved movies" would never have reached a wider, newer audience. Even if they lightly poke fun at the movies they show, they actually show a great deal of respect, and if you can't notice them when watching almost any episode, you're being blinded by bias. They crack wise because they care. The fact they even made a show about airing bad movies should be proof enough for you.
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"leave your mind at the door."
fuck you. Bill Paxton should be embarased. -
Bad actor, good agent. 'nuff said. Much like Jeff Goldblum.
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Wow, Burton directing a Bollywood film. That sounds like a great idea. Tell you what, why don't you get started on the bursting into flames part now and the rest of us will catch up with you later. Thanks champ.
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I'll watch MST3K the Movie any day of the week before I would ever watch Twister again (or anything else on this list. Normal view....normal viewww...noormal viewwwwwww....NOOOOOORRRRMAAAALLL VIEEEEWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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I love great early SF films. Time Machine, The Thing, War of the Worlds, The Day the Earth Stood Still, Forbidden Planet... I grew up on these as much as I did on Trek and Star Wars. The one I never did catch (in those pre-Blockbuster days) was This Island Earth. I remember being home from college and finding it one a cable channel, happy to finally get a chance to watch it.
And it stank.
Not in a "gee,not as good as I thought it would be" way, but in a "poorly written, poorly acted, poorly conceived" sort of way. Don't get me wrong - it's enjoyable in the same way that many bad 50s SF movies are, but in no way shape or form does it deserve to be ranked with the films I listed above.
A few years later, I heard MST - a show I knew of but never watched - was going after this so-called classic, and was thrilled. When interviewed, one of the creators was asked why go after such an esteemed piece of SF film history, to which he replied "Have you watched it?"
I can say yes I have seen it, yes it sucks, and yes it deserves this treatment.
Truth to power. -
He is my favor! Just saw his profile on interracial dating site called B L A C K W H I T E K I S S .C O M last week. He is writing her blog there.
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Despite my ragging on TIE, it is head and shoulders above the vast majority of D-level crappola that MST ripped on, but that's like being the best episode of My Mother the Car. It deserves to be taken down a peg because it is terribly overrated, a B movie dressed in A movie clothes.
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bridging the Harry/MST3K gap by saying: "but Harry, they liiiked those movies!" Welcome to "you're wrong night". There's no way anybody could ever, in a million years think that EEagh or The Sidehackers or The Beast Of Yucca Flats or Manos: Hands of Fate were anything but huge piles of shit. These are truly terrible movies, folks and deserved to be mocked. Also, to echo an earlier poster; Harry, just because you're nostalgic about a movie doesn't mean that it's a particularly good movie. When I was a kid, every Saturday my local UHF station (hey, kids, remember UHF?) would show two monster movies back-to-back. Usually they would show like minded movies together. Two Hammer movies for example. One Saturday they showed two Gamera movies. My friends and I went apeshit. Sure we knew who Godzilla was, but a flying turtle with flames shooting out? Pure bliss. We ran around pretending to be Gamera for like 8 hours, man. I loved that turtle. Then 15 years later I was watching MST3K and Gamera came on. Guess what? I found it funny as hell. Know why? Because my adult brain was able to separate the nostalgia of the Gamera movies and the reality that they weren't very good. SO I think some perspective might be in order when it comes to you and MST3K, Harry. Also, to say that you hate all of MST3k because they make fun of your favorite movies is really scary because it says that you love all 150-200 of those movies that they riffed on.That's a lot of really bad movies to love, man. And if you can honestly say that you love The Day The Earth Froze then I can honestly say you love EVERY movie ever made. I guess that's something.
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Go check that shit out if you haven't seen it!!
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"Brak has visible panty line."
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Harry, seriously. "Genre" movies? I would hardly call Manos or Mixed-up Zombies genre flicks, if that's a polite way of saying they are garbage but still managed to get made. Come on, not every movie on the planet is awesome. Hottie and Nottie are proof enough of that.
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...get sort of a gleeful and anarchistic glee when they experience such films as "Eegah!" and "M:THOF"? If they were just painful, they wouldn't air them and wreak them on the world, but it's almost an education to watch these movies, and I think they understand that.
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but The Car? Hell yeah. Christine may have had more depth, at least the novel, but the car owned. Before General Lee, before KITT, there was The Car. Long before VCRs, in the days when your tv had three channels you got up to change I saw this movie two or three times on television. A demonic car, driven by Satan presumably, with nothing to do except run the local townsfolk over, and that badass scare you to death horn? It scares you to death, then you're dead under the tires. Ronny Cox, James Brolin, I could just keep rambling. This is classic. I need to rent this.
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TFWea3Eu97E
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...is the SHIT!!
What a great little movie! It scared the crap out of me as a kid. So weird, so unrelenting. I consider The Car to be the perfect example as to why virtually no horror movies made today actually work, while almost any premise, no matter how outrageous, could be made to work in an old school horror movie. The Car plays everything completely straight, and there isn't one second during the film that you don't buy it hook, line and fucking sinker.
HONKHONKHONK - HOOOOOOONNNKK!!!! -
May 08, 2008 7:42:34 AM CDT
The title is so simple and straightforward too
by grammaton cleric binks
The Car. The name says it all.
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Target will be my next stop today... HONNNNNK!
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You just helped me find a movie that Ive been searching for.Its one of those movies where you remember a scene or an image or two.I remember catching it I think years ago on USA network on the show hosted by Captain Usa(that corny ass motherfucka)The movie is Devil Times Five.Now I can rest that part of my brain that has been hooked on the creepy nun in the red habit.
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Watching that moronic hippie with the french horn get run over 6 times. Beautiful.
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Kathleen Lloyd's polyester Camel Toe.
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Because of the last two days of this talkback. I've seen some good old time sci-fi films. This Island Earth is *not* one of them. With that being said: "This is your dishwasher liquid. You soak in it." "And it's a long par 5 to the nation's capital..." "Suddenly I have a refreshing mint flavor!" Bliss.
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Chrysler obviously modeled the 300C on it.
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That opening sequence with the couple on the bikes. That shot where you just see the streak of blood on the wall...
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...how those folks who were buying MST3K:TM at $100 a pop on eBay are feeling right now.
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I think that you literally watch everything that has ever been filmed. I seriously do not understand how you can stand to do that. It seems like your life is a living hell. I'm not exagerating when I say that I think that watching all the movies that you seem to watch would be the equivilant of mild torture. Watching all these movies is not merely a waste of time, it seems like extremely self destructive behaviour. Why would you subject yourself to at best constant mediocrity, and at worst stomach churning "art". It's like going to the garbage dump and pulling out your fork, and gorging yourself on the truckloads of waste, and never stopping. Harry, do you eat as poorly as you watch movies? This is grotesque. Did you actually watch that "Hottie and Nottie"? How did you possibly do that without puking? I group that movie with almost all of your other "picks". lol
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there's good spoofs, there's bad spoofs. I didn't care for it, even with the infamous "do you like eggplant?" quote.
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May 08, 2008 1:39:34 PM CDT
I forget, how did the wife beater (guy not shirt)
by grammaton cleric binks
get involved in helping the cops out in The Car. I remember the French horn dude getting creamed repeatedly though. Harry was right. Airwolf doesn't stand a chance against The Car. I mean It smashes into cliffs, and chunks of cliffs fall off. Nuff said. I wonder if the seats were Corinthian leather.... made from real Corinthians.
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OLEG
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I gotta get my head out of my third point of contact.
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j7HZf7k2gTo
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I'll see your House of Pain and raise you an Elvis:http://tinyurl.com/4m88q4 Or a U2: http://tinyurl.com/3v8qme
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I mean our President does to you, but your oh-so precious movies don't deserve it? BULLSHIT. I usually support you but you're being pretentious and preachy, not to mention too serious. There are crap movies out there, and they deserve ridicule just as you deserve it for your payolas and biasedness. Don't act so 'holier-than-thou' when you have quite a few flaws in your character, chum.
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Good times, good times.This Island Earth is credability-destroyingly-awful.
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Is the shit and I don't care what you may think about it. Funny thing, I actually saw This Island Earth before I ever saw MST3K. But watching them poke fun at stuff in that movie makes for one of the funniest movies ive ever seen.
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So when the MST3K guys made a movie entertaining in a different way than was intended, I don't see the problem. Personally, they riffed on flicks I enjoy, but I didn't take it personally. Maybe I'm just weird, I dunno. Laserblast and Zombie Nightmare are flicks I probably wouldn't have enjoyed, but the MST3K versions absolutely killed me.
Also, I bought and watched The Car today in my girlfriend's parents' sweet-ass theatre. The screen's like eight feet across, so that opening scene with the car appearing in the tunnel was super fun. -
The Car is more like what I expected when I first heard the concept of a damn car that's death proof. What a waste
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... that was about drug abuse. The dog-type aliens (think they were called dingos?) were making this drug and this one kid got hooked. He started going through withdrawal and would do anything to get his high. The episode ended with him OD'ing and dead, with a final shot of his funeral before Bravestarr came on with the obligatory "don't do drugs" message. Was a pretty mature story for a kids' show. I haven't seen it in 20 years and it's still memorable somehow.
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..supposed to look like shit?
http://www.thedigitalbits.com/#mytwocents -
You're holding a Mu-tant turd!
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why does that Paris shit look like its titled 'the hot tie and the not tie'? is it a movie about ties?
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That Harry recommends that ridiculous shitball of a movie "I'm Not There". Besides the admittedly incredibly watchable Cate bits, that thing is the most cliche'-ridden piece of laughable crap I've ever had the displeasure of sitting through. Utter garbage.
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Cause even the uni-brow chick is more attractive than her.
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It was the most blatant bit of false advertising for a movie (a shot that was in the trailer but not in the moobie) EVER!. Well, except for the classic line from Empire "Go back to your ghetto!" Tragic too that there are 100+ talkbacks and didn't see a single one for Macon County Line. Nice shock ending - first fuzzy-focus sex scene - in a tub in a barn, no less - that I can recall - but i never saw Last Tango so what do I know.
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much. The best House of Pain was spliced with the Clone Wars cartoon. Mace was going off on everything, but the video got pulled. Here's the second best one.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UyllTHBBv9A -
The cover art for Teeth? That is f-bombing funomenal! It looks like the sequel to The Girl Next Door. That's mercilessly subversive. I really hope that cover manages to lure a few hapless folks to what will surely be their cinematic demise. It would be awesome if the blurb synopsis on the back were equally misleading...
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As long as we're debating the relative merits of MST3K:My friends and I were "riffing" on terrible films YEARS before anyone saw MST3K...as I'm sure were everyone else and their friends. So please don't blame that on Joel and Mike. It would happen with or without them. If people are talking during "Speed Racer," or any theatrical screening, it's cuz they're assholes, not cuz they're MST3K fans. Riffing should be done amongst like-minded groups in controlled situations (home viewing), or under your breath to whomever has happened to be so kind as to accompany you to a movie. Except in the case of that last Highlander movie. God, that was awful.
It is not impossible to enjoy both the original film and the MST3Ked version. There are several MST3K episodes where I've had that moment of "Hey! I like that movie!" at the beginning, but come on now...almost every film, TV show, book, video game, radio show or any sort of media content has conceits that only make sense within the work itself. When considered out of context, those attributes easily become laughable. Sure, by definition, pointing out those conceits breaks the mystique of the original work, but that process can be enjoyed on its own merits as well. Would these guys (the MST3K crew) really have invested years of their lives in the show if they didn't truly love film? Kevin Murphy, the latter day voice of Tom Servo, wrote a book entitled "A Year at the Movies," chronicling a year of his life where he visited a different movie theater every day for a year. You don't do that if you don't truly love the medium and the experience of seeing movies in a theater. It is possible to love something and recognize its shortcomings at the same time....not to get too deep, but isn't that what love means? To truly accept something, warts and all, whether it be a person, a place, a book, or a movie?
I'm just pissed because these guys thought of a way to make money from this shiznit before I did.
*Enhance your calm.* -
Gave me a boner. The movie was fun too. Now I can't drive through the country and look at a cornfield without imagining a cyclone ripping through it.
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for all the reasons you noted.
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The only times I have heard riffing in the theater was when the movie was truly terrible, and for anyone who lives or has lived in Burbank as I did, you may know that there is a certain movie theater there where most of the audience riffs on movies loudly ALL THE TIME, and in all cases this made the movie going experience far more enjoyable than it would have been otherwise, because those guys are really funny. The most memorable time for me was watching "Wing Commander" (which I went to for the Phantom Menace trailer back when I was a George Lucas fan), and it was one of the funniest movies I have EVER seen, and only because of the riffing. I want to go back to that theater in Burbank, because I need a good laugh like that again. I don't think the Mystery Science Theater guys are as funny as the Burbank audience.
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Right on, man. That definitely falls under my definition of a "group of like-minded people." I need to go to that theater. Sounds like fun. Wing Commander was pretty hilarious. My favorite theatrical riffing experience was "Highlander: Endgame." And that time, me and my friends *were* the assholes. At the end, this dude stormed past us as we left, clearly taking the whole thing far more seriously than anyone really should. Felt like crap about that. Oh well. Doesn't change the fact that the movie deserved every bit of scorn we poured on it. So there ya go.
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Don't worry. I can hire you in five years to color-correct for me and tell you what would fit the image and story best. Tranquilo...
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Bravestarr owns your ass!!!!
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dammit! where the hell is this movie being sold. i missed my chance the first time around and now that it's supposed to be out again, its nowhere. not at wal mart, not at target, not at ciruit city and not at best buy. hell not even at any of the stores at the mall. did it really come out or was it back ordered everywhere? cuz that's the damn answer i get everytime i've asked for it. i want my "THE CAR".
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