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Casting For TRANSFORMERS 2 Progresses...
Merrick here...
A while back some casting details were leaked for Michael Bay's TRANSFORMERS sequel, which shoots this Summer. You can find those details HERE.
Now we're starting to get reports about who might be in contention for certain roles. One of the first names being bandied about is Jonah Hill.
"Hill (Superbad, Forgetting Sarah Marshall) will provide the comic relief as a sidekick to Shia's Sam Witwicky.
...says THIS ARTICLE at Entertainment Weekly, which goes on to indicate Hill is said to be in contention for the role of Shia's college roommate.
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The subject is FIRST!!!!!!!!!!! BITCHES!!!!!!!!!!!
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I will avoid this movie.
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You totally know it!
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They Are In Everything!!!
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Jonah Hill would be enough comic relief.
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OOH pick me! pick me!
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And it seems every steaming turd Hollywood pumps needs a bumbling sidekick for comic relief.Sigh.
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Transformers 2? Ain´t it mongoloid news?
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is not talented but he keeps showing up in movies! WHY? who will stop this idea that fat kids are funny simply because they're fat?
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bet ya 10 quid they bring on the Contructicons, or some bay-erism version of them-they can sell 5/6 toys instead of one that way... ;-)
And more robot charactorisation bits please, instead of those pesky humans looking awe-struck-sentiant bits of scrap metal have feelings too you know! ;-) -
Isnt he the Autobots bumbling sidekick already? Now theres gonna be 2 bumbling sidekicks? I'm one of the few Pro-Transformers Pt.1 people on these boards, but c'mon Bay now your pushing it. F Michael Bay!
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I don't care who they cast so long as Metroplex is in it.
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Man, I respect Hill but I can't stand the shit that is presented as Transformers. Fuck Bay and his lowest common denominator sensibilities.
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How does that work, exactly? The way Harpo is a comic relief to Groucho? No, that's wrong, comparing damn Shia to Groucho: I guess a more appropriate way would be saying that he'll be the comic relief to Shia the way Larry is the comic relief to Curly.
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I'm in the huge minority of people on this site that actually really liked the first Transformers. Plus Jonah Hill is hilarious, so this could be really cool.
I seriously don't understand all of the hate for Transformers (go ahead and question my sexuality now asshole geeks). It was a great special effects, popcorn movie. How many of the posts in this talkback are going to be comprised of poor little geeks crying about how "Transformers raped my childhood". Get over yourselves. Fuck, I need some coffee. -
that all / most fan representations of these characters are still the classic characters and not the "reimagined designs". Bays design will never replace the originals. Not unless he atleast makes the cahracters as cool as they were in the cartoon as opposed to bumbling cockgobblers.
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on this whole forum that liked Transformers. That being said, I can't wait for the sequel. I'm just saying. In fact, I liked Shia, I thought he did a great job.
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please and thanks
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Please?!
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Apr 30, 2008 10:06:23 AM CDT
For those who don't understand how Jonah Hill keeps getting work
by hawaiian organ donor
Check out some of the behind-the-scenes on the Superbad DVD. You can see him in the background giving El Diablo a rub'n'tug. Lindsey Lohan is also briefly seen skulking away wiping off her chin.
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never post before a cup of coffee, always gets you in trouble. But i agree, first one was good. It did not, I repeat DID NOT, rape my childhood. But two bumbling sidekicks is 2 too many.
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cast more dirtytan pornotrash girlies to get the teenage boys away from Grand Theft Auto V: Adventures in my Bedroom? You got to love Bay and his lack of artistic integrity.
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In the first one? With Jon Voigt, Anthony Anderson and John Turturro acting like retards? I bet they probably thought the movie just wouldn't happen and were like I'm not going to take this seriously at all and act like a baby. I bet they saw the movie when it was done and were like ???? oops they really did make this happen. Oh well where my check? SEQUEL!
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#1 was a joke, and after seeing it, I have zero interest in a sequel. Another 2 hours of fart and piss jokes, of crap instead of any real hard Sci-Fi? If I'm sick and too tired to find the remote, and 2 comes on TBS one day, I might watch it, if I don't fall asleep.
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We don't need fucking comic relief in a real Transformers movie. Make it a prequel, set on Cybertron, and kick everyone else out of the movie.
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Am I the only one who thought this was one of the better parts of the movie?
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and that was the best part of the masterpiece that was Bay's Transformers: the dialogue. The script was top-notch. The jokes were hilarious. The human characters were iconic, to say the least. I can't wait for a new Transformers movie! I hope more Transformers (Optimus maybe?) get their chances to lubricate humans.
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and who can forget his award winning performance as the kid that wanted to buy the
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That said, I have a previously viewed copy that I put in to clear my wife out of the room when she wants to spend some time with me.
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and who can forget his award winning performance as the kid that wanted to buy the platform shoes in 'virgin'? amazing work.
this kid must be one of apatow's ball warts or something. we can't get rid of him.
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get it, because he is round? har har har.
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Transformers was so shitty, that the academy must've decided to punish everyone involved giving the Special Effects Oscar to The Golden Compass instead.
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in Superbad. Hmmm, lots of crap together in one place
Transformers 2 is going to be one large toilet -
...George W. showed up with that "Controversy"-headline.
Why? Because I already knew by then that it would suck like all these Ill-ustrateds, Robot Chickens and whatever these millions of animated "satire"-shows do. -
So you hope a complete stranger gets kidnapped and raped because he likes a movie that you don't? I guess I wouldn't really expect a different opinion from someone who employs such a crass and disgusting user name. Seriously, are you 13 years old, because you fucking act like it. Grow up douche.
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... for all college kids to be funny
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You, my friend, are obviously not a morning person.
You should go have a nice big cup of shut the fuck up. It's a special blend that I'm sure you'll enjoy. -
Yup, that's danny boy at his finest.Where's Queefer when you need him....
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the whole first movie was "comic relief"
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1. The only way I'll be watching Transformers 2 is with the aid of people talking over it.2. Over the Top has a better script and better acting than the first Transformers.
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Here's another rhetorical question: in order to provide comic relief, don't you either have to be funny or be given funny lines?
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Only self hating nerds on this site seem to have a problem with it.
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to propose a federal law that prohibits Michael Bay from directing anything that isn't a car chase in a buddy cop movie.
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I walked in expecting a mindless action movie. What I got what was a few barely visible action scenes in a 2 hour Nickelodeon sitcom.
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THANK GOD! WHEN I WATCHED TRANSFORMERS 20 YEARS AGO, I THOUGHT "YOU KNOW WHAT THIS IS MISSING?"........
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"i am a fighting robot"
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IN THE TRANSFORMERS MOVIE?!? I almost gave up when Jon Voight started gunning down junk.
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not that i'm surprised they'd get right into producing a sequel, but damned if the first one doesn't even serve as a guilty pleasure. i really gave the first one a chance. saw it once in the theater, had a couple moments of giddiness where i felt it would kick in, but it just never did. i bought it on dvd figuring i'd enjoy watching the set pieces now and then, but sold the dvd after one set-piece only viewing. it was just intolerable. how bad is a movie when you can't even enjoy it as a guilty pleasure? i'll never give michael bay the benefit of the doubt ever again.
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Please no more masturbation jokes. I don't want an otherwise fun time at the show with my 9 year old to turn into a sit-down talk at the kitchen table. Damn you, and your exploding swimming pool!
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especially if Soundwave is in the film. It doesn't really matter whose voice you put through the vocoder - so it would be really nice (especially for those fans who care) to see Welker go up against Cullen again. (Yes, I know there was the video game of the movie but enough said).
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I wasn't aware they changed the words "total shit" to "awesome." I'll have to update my dictionary.There were so many awesome moments, it's hard to keep track. The 5-ton, 4-story robots stomping around a neighborhood that no one notices was really "awesome" and then there's the government agent was remains threatening and indignant when he's surrounded by a group of 5-ton, 4-story robots who could turn him into a skidmark. Yeah, that was so totally "awesome."
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you know it
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Any good will you got for Superbad, is gone now. I didn't think you were funny before Superbad. You were very funny in Superbad. Now you've gone and Seth Rogan'ed yourself.... seeing that you are pretty much Seth Rogan's bitch.
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... even more sucktacular than previously expected.
Will there be digitally rendered flames on Jonah Hill's man-boobs? -
To roll around in one of those Segways? What a great sidekick that would of been!!! "Wait just a second there Sam Witwicky! You can't go to Cybertron without the ashtray, the remote control, the paddle ball game, this magazine and the chair. And That's all you'll need. I'll keep the dog. (Grr) Ok, I won't keep the dog..."
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Apr 30, 2008 10:59:00 AM CDT
Gee, just what a Bay Transformers movie needed! MORE lame-ass co
by nico toscani
The entire Transformers movie WAS comic relief! I sat there begging for just one serious moment. But oh no. I got a dumb-ass collect call operator, Anthony Anderson eating a plate of donuts, Bumblebee peeing on John Tuturo, and on and on and on. HARDY-FUCKING-HAR! I think what a Bay Transformers movie needs is some dramatic relieft to save us from all of this alleged comedy.
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Especially in Jonah Hill's case.
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...apparently anyways because while I didn't go into fits of rage and take a razor to my armpits...I must say that Transformers...for the most part...sucked. Even some of the kewler scenes had Bay's trademark "What a 13 year old fat kid thinks is awesome!!!" bullshit like a fucking giant robot getting peed on by a dog or appropriating local colloquialism such as "My bad!". Fun to watch ok...yeah...that's why its not total shit to me. But I still use the phrase "it sucked" when describing the movie. I don't have mindless Shia hate but I do agree with the above posters that he is the comic relief in the first one so now we're getting comic relief for the comic relief? Do we really need this much fucking comic relief...ever??...much less in a fucking giant popcorn action movie? Was Bay a god damn comedian in college or something? Is this a new sub-genre oc Action-Comedy? Actiedy? Comction? Act-Com? Douchebaggia? I still think it would have been better if the Autobots were basically not even paying attention to the humans outside of trying to prevent them getting harmed during their fight. But what we got instead was a bunch of puppy-like giant robots following around Kramer, Chaz Kramer asshole. Oh and this fat "Shamon!" guy? WTF? Between Will Ferrel and the Apatow mutants...is there anything in American comedy cinema left? (and no, I'm not counting the utter bugshit spoof movies...I wouldn't think you should get your ass beat for creating something meant to be enjoyed but those guys....shit..they did give us Anna Faris who is both highly cutie/hottie/sexkittinie and quite fun to watch outside of their spoof crap (I still think she was the main reason why "Just Friends" was actually more than just another dumbass rom-com....Faris and the younger brother role).
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To demonstrate the genius that is Michael Bay here is my favorite Transformers quote: "Don't you guys have some type of organic genetic based computer?" What the fuck was that? It's proof that to that degenerate coke head Michael Bay (and let's not forget that quacking idiot Don Murphy) dialog is that stuff that happens in between the action. I fucking hate you both. You are what makes Hollywood so unbearable. Fuck this movie, fuck your comic relief and fuck those clunky ass designs. I couldn't tell what the hell was going on half the time. And while I do not wish harm to fans of the first flick, I can still say that you should have your head examined for even proclaiming in public that you thought the movie was awesome. You do know that awesome is a positive adjective right? Just wanted to make sure.
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Isn't there a Mamma something or other in the cast? Rickey is certain that it will be some awful racist caricature of a matronly black woman. Good for Bay catering to the midwest casual racist demographic...
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Apr 30, 2008 11:11:20 AM CDT
Says Shia, after Hill consumes all his Ramen noodles and beer:
by mosquito march
"No, no, no, no, nononononononono, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO!"
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You're absolutely correct. No Michael Bay movie is complete without the one liner from the sassy black person. I say he should cast the Reverend Wright as the sassy black stereotype for this one.
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Yes! You just know Bay is itching to put The Reverend Wright in this. And while they're at it, they should just rename the whole movie "Republican Space Robots."
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...like a mailman wearing those goofy ass mailman shorts and maybe a fucking safari helmet mailman style. Or he could be a CHiPs-like traffic cop wearing those german wide hip cop pans and knee high black boots with a stupid ass gold and blue half helmet with that perpetual top row of teeth only smile that 'John' always had. Or maybe he could be a cab driver wearing a bandana or something. He could have a few days of beard stuble and some playbody pictures pinned to the visors while the music is something new all the kids love like "Let the bodies hit the floor"...fuck! He can be wearing an eyepatch!!! Now that's fucking awesome cinema dudes!
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How do you think he gets access to all those Pentagon toys? Like in the beginning when that helicopter is about to attack the base and they scramble those jets. You see the shot of the jets, but you never see them in action. What the hell was that?
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The first movie blew so much ass load. And has anyone seen that cable commercial with MIchael Gay saying "awesome" and blowing shit up? He can't even not act like the ass pipe he appears to be. Someone please take the camera way from him.
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May you continue to be 'not a morning person'. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to tend to my daughter in the basement and see if any of our children are of a child-bearing age yet...
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i cant wait, i like it all so far and im an original 80's kid too
go forth mr.bay and blow it all the fuck up -
Best movie since Troll 2. Fact.
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Can someone please tell where this fat fuck came from? He's not funny, he can't act and he is just as intolerable to watch on screen as Shia LaDouche. SO now we have this fat headed idiot aaaaand Shia in Transfarters 2? I won't even rent this shit bucket. BUt what i will do is stay here and complain about it.
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is all that I care about. "Very nice! How much?"
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Apr 30, 2008 11:35:42 AM CDT
Jonah Hill + Shia Lebouf + Michael Bay = Dried Doo Doo
by underoos hero
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so either learn to love his piles of shit or keep getting your childhood raped. Transformers did rape my childhood, but it looked like a hot blonde teacher from Florida when it did!
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... the TINO films will always be a big joke.
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I'm assuming his massive schedule of upcoming film projects made him pass on this film.
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It was old last year. You guys should just let it go. You'd have so much more energy for other things, like dating girls. Good day.
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My wife loves Superbad and thinks Jonah Hill is hysterical. It just makes it that much easier to get her to go see this movie.
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Strong enough to allow Jonah Hill to sit in it? Bumblebee couldn't handle his weight. Possibly Fortress Maximus???
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I thought he was funny as hell in SuperBad and at his age I don't expect much in range but.....I've had my fill of annoying fat guys. However, if he's in this and Tyrese Gibson isn't I'll consider it a fair compromise.
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Most of Transformers focused on the human characters...I thought the show was about gargantuan transforming mechanical beings, not bratty high school teenie boppers. Will the actual epymonious characters receive more screen time?
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will ressurect Jazz in the new movie. Jazz will then proceed to go on a militant tirade blaming Optimus Prime for spreading the hate plauge that was showcased in The Return of Optimus Prime cartoon.
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They are really trying to out-suck themselves by casting this loud, unfunny tub of cowshit. I'll only see it if Shia strips down and shows off that supple ass of his.
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The type of people that went to Superbad and thought it was hillarious and think Jonah Hill is funny, are the same no taste havin' tards that think Adam Sandler, Jack Black, Calos Mexican, Jay Leno and the most unfunny loser hack fuck of all time DANE COOK....THis guy should be in Bayformers 2 with the rest of the shit.
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Sweet lord don't do it man! you are a funny guy! Transformers movie = Comedy wasteland! unless you try and hide them! then it's comedy Gold! NOT!
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Just cast Dane Cook too. Have Optimus, Bumblebee and Megatron get into a slap fight three stooges style and call it a day. Put a fucking laugh track on it to cue the morons who go to see shit like this so they know where to laugh and you have a hit. Damn you Michael Bay indeed.
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A real laugh-riot... A movie called 'Transformers' lead by human characters. Bring on '7 Minutes of Transformers 2'.
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Get him and the Ghost of Pat Morita to star in Collision Course II: The Transfomers.
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My studio source just told me the Harlem Globetrotters, Phyllis Diller, Johnathan Winters, and Charles Nelson Reilley have all signed on for the pic.
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Because if he's still alive, he should do the voice of Megatron's foreign country bumpkin cousin.
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Transformers indeed.
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Get Rip Taylor to join the wacky cast as a Cab Driver along with a guest spot by Steve Martin playing a bell hop at a hotel.
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Maximum Overdrive. He can be Prime's arch-nemesis. Give Stephen King the directing reigns and his coke habit back and watch the sparks fly.
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THe wacky Rip Taylor cab is actually....wait for it....A Decepticon. I guess there is more than meets the eye, huh? Uh HaH HaH hard har har...n'such
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Why not? If Michael Bay wants this to suck, then at least act like you mean it.
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More than meets the eye....
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you hit the nail right on the head. If they stick with that formula the movie will be both sci-fi and comedy gold!
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Bring back Josta!
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You can have a buncha little wacky Doozers build shit and working on the autobots while Kermit rides his bike past the Decepticons undetected on his little bike with a basket full of Autobot parts. What?
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Charles Nelson Riley yet? It's too bad that Sammie Davis Junior and Dean Martin are gone, because if there ever was a movie that was screaming for them to team up again it's this one! I just got it! How about we have Cannonball Run 3 except this time the cars turn into robots and blow shit up real good?
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We should be getting paid for all this comedy gold. You know you can't go wrong with Rip Taylor and the like mixed with Muppets, Fraggles, Doozers and Cannonball Run. Where's our check Hollywood?
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Will all come out of retirement to be in this film.
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Now that would be asstacular.
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Apparently he didn't want to play second fiddle to Shia. Ha ha ha!
After he turned it down they offered it to a few other 'names' who all declined as well. So they split the character into two different parts and gave a bunch of unknowns a shot. Instead of the wacky college roommate it became the wacky college roommate and the other wacky college guy across the hall. As far as I know that's still how it is.
I don't know, maybe Jonah has come to his senses and realised that he's actually pretty lucky to be working at all, not to mention that second fiddle is literally the only card he has up his sleeve. -
And I just added Dustin Diamond too? Shit we should get paid.
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... take everyone's virginity!
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And ass? Okay, I'll buy a ticket.
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Cause they fuckin' suck too.
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I think you've struck casting gold! Dustin Diamond can be the third fiddle character Benito is talking about. Please Michael Bay! Make it happen. And oh yeah, we should get paid.
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forget adding anyone else
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All the military related stuff and the Transformer battles were amazing, the rest of the film was juvenile and rather dull.
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It looks like Trans 2 is turning down to be a bad movie after all.
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I didn't hate or love the first one. It's just one of those flicks that you will see regardless. Bay's obviously a hack that's just throwing in stuff that he thinks the masses want to see. I wouldn't be surprised if Seth Rogan and someone like Dane Cook had a cameo in this one.
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You just did SUPERBAD, now is not time to bow down to Satan, it's time to prove you have integrity and that that one wasn't a fluke. Do you want to be George Clooney in OUT OF SIGHT, or BATMAN AND ROBIN?
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Bumblebee, in car mode, is parked idle at a remote beach. Megan Fox is nude, reclining on his hood and masturbating. Some other hot chick comes in from the water where she was swimming. Seeing megan, she tugs off her own bikini bottoms (she wasn't wearing a top to begin with) and approaches. For the next 50 minutes, the women writhe on the hood, in the sand, and in the water. After the girls fall off Bumblebee's hood, he changes to robot mode and starts pleasuring himself, and it's like a bike pump--squeak, squeak, squeak. But of course, the focus is on the girls.
That's it. Roll credits -
I said Dane Cook but yes, let's add Seth Rogan while we're at it.
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And please, cast Fred Ward as a curmudgeonly mechanic. That would fucking ROCK. No really, I like Fred.
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Apr 30, 2008 12:22:17 PM CDT
montage666, They've already pretty much cast the other sidekick.
by benito
I know who it is but the deal ain't inked yet and I wouldn't want to fuck it up for him. Suffie to say it is, alas, not Mr Diamond. However, if this report is actually legit and not just old news warmed up then maybe they'll turn it back into one character again, in which case poor old 'redacted' will be shunted to the side. ...That'd be a shame. He's way more talented than Jonah 'I am yelling so it must be funny' Hill.
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You act as if there is something to save with Jonah Hill. The kid is not funny. I know you can claim matter of taste but my humor runs the gamut and I can honestly say that he is not funny NOR talented. Chris Farley was funny and talented. These guys are not even in his league. We get nothing but watered down talent these days. THANKS YOU TUBE!!
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DAMN!!!
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So cliche, it's no longer a cliche.
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don't listen to Vern. He aint paying your bills. Take the money and the fame son
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Damn You, Damn You, Michael Bay! http://tinyurl.com/5u3wz8
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Apr 30, 2008 12:30:32 PM CDT
If any movie will pull Connery out of retirement, it's this
by hawaiian organ donor
"You wanna get Megatron? He transforms into a knife, you transform into a gun. He sends one of yours to the mechanic, you send one of his to the scrap heap! That's the Autobot way!"
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... to really prove his break out chops as an actor, why doesn't he hit the gym, lay off the Blue Bird Toasties, slim down and go for a leading role in something like say...Turner and Hooch 3?
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is that your poem? That's hilarious, and frighteningly accurate. Harry's clip-popping comment is right up there with chocolate-coated pussyjuice
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He can spring Wesley out of prison! Can't wait for the crappy Owen Glieberman review where he'll go the pun filled headline "King of the Hill."
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Yeah, it is hilarious but it's not mine. It's been floating around for awhile. I think it's something every talkbacker should see at least once. Let's pass it around.
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But what a bunch of whiners many of you all are. I grew up in the 80's and you know what, this was a frigging cartoon! Get over the first movie as ruining the memories, of your childhood, etc. Your not 10 anymore! Sorry, but it always infuriates me that everyone expects to see things in the same light and for movies have the same impact as when you were a kid (See prequels, new Indy, etc). Didn't any of you frigging read or see The Outsiders? "Stay Golden Ponyboy", do you know what it friggin means? it means enjoy your youth, because as you get older you will never see things quite the same way. Realize that and you will learn to enjoy movies for what they are, and not have expectations for them to change the way you view life. Especially kid topic movies. Sorry for the rant. As far as casting, I will wait and see how the movie actually plays out and if it actually is ENTERTAINING before I pass judgment. I thought the worst thing about the first one was the Series 7 guy (from Rounders) who just wasn't funny . I thought the rest was good for a KID's CARTOON. It wasn't supposed to be Schlinder's List you know.
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and comedians!
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Ok dipshit, listen up. Nobody is bitchin about the transformers movie ruining their childhood. Our memories of childhood are rock solid because people with talent and imagination were making consistently great art just for us. No, no... The reason people hate on Transformers the movie is not because of the past, but because of the present. It was a piece of offensive shit, and that movies like that can do well and be celebrated by people like you is an indictment on our culture. Your argument about it not needing to be Schindlers List or whatever the fuck is insideous bullshit. There aren't only two kinds of films in the world (black and white holocaust movies and Michael Bay directed garbage). I happen to care about pop culture cinema. It's what I do and I make sure to do it fuckin well. Big mainstream movies are a major part of our society. Don't think it's a problem when they're obnoxious retarded garbage? Think again. It's a big problem. Firstly that they can get made at all, but secondly that it actually makes perfect economic sense to make them when the earth is littered with characters of your obvious lack of discernment. They make these movies bad on purpose. They have meetings about it where they discuss how stupid you are. And you know what? As long as you're prepared to drink from the teat, then the cows gonna keep producing it's rank, poisonous milk. Mainstream entertainment should be first fucking rate! Transformers was a first rate disaster.
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Blow it out your ass, please.
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Jesus Christ this movie was a fun popcorn flick. That's all it was trying to be. I'm sorry Optimus Prime wasn't emo enough for you guys or that you think an 80's toy commerical disguised as a cartoon series set a standard unmatched by modern cinema but get a life. It's a fucking movie about giant fucking robots that turn into fucking cars. WTF did you expect?
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I expected competence. I encourage you to do the same sometime. You'll be disappointed, but at least you'll suck that little bit less.
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I hope they continue to pile on the crap so that this will bomb and Bay/Orci/Kurtzman/Murphy will stop deficating on Transformers.
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You might think Jonah Hill isn't the next Orson Welles, but wait, just wait.
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or arrogant asshole?
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We'll probably be subjected to seeing Jonah Hill run. A guy that fat, it's going to look uninentionally hilarious. I'm just saying. Plus there will be the inevitable comment that his tits outshine those of Megan Fox.
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...who gets together and decides what's hip and kewl without seemingly waiting to see if real people actually think those things are hip and kewl? There was no committee for Bluto. Belushi was never pre-packaged and sanitized instant comedy just add attention. We all saw Animal House...the eyebrows...the food line at the cafeteria....the acoustic guitar smash apology....Belushi was pure genius as the original chubby but actually hilarious college guy. Just because 2 or 3 people (ok, 10 people) decided these guys are "hilarious" doesn't mean we all do. Just because Apatow produces laugh-worthy comedy from time to time doesn't mean he's the new Reitman. Where was the 3/5 vote on Uma Thurman being the hottest woman on the planet today...have you seen her fucking man-feet and giant man-hands? What about that shocking ostrich-like profile? Where was the committee meeting on deeming Will Ferrel as heir apparent to the actually-funny-comedy legacy of Belushi and Murray? Don't get me wrong...for American cinematic comedy...we don't get much else and some of this stuff is definitely funny....but it seems like out of the blue there are these people who are just magically accepted en masses as being hilarious, beautiful, talented, genius, whatever....hard to articulate but maybe...think of the asshat who drives down the side of the road illegally to avoid a line of traffic. Everybody hates that douchebag....but nobody is more of a clueless dick than the mousebiter who lets that narcissist prick back into traffic after cutting off 50 cars. Make sense?
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WEREN'T actually in the 2007 TINO movie. That was part of the problem with it.
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Apr 30, 2008 1:37:27 PM CDT
GornPirate, did you change your mind about the car tie-ins?
by just pillow talk
This film is going to be nothing but a 2 hour new car c
by GornPirate May 31st, 2006
11:23:19 PM
I like Transformers and if done right, which I doubt Bay can pull off, this film could rock. But I really fear more than anything this film will be nothing but tie ins to the launching of a bunch of new car models. That Camaro for example is new model expected to go on sale about the same time as this film will hit the screen. This movie is going to have so many automotive product tie ins it's going to make us puke. -
No way in the world you can make them see how juvenile the show was in the first place with its motor vehicle jokes and silly situations not to mention half the robots turning into stuff that made no logical sense what so ever. Bay's movie as silly a popcorn flick as it was, is still MILES better than any of those Transformer cartoons i grew up loving and makes ten billion times more sense. Thank Christ i discovered women and grew out of robots toys that turned into another object or vehicle just for the hell of it and left my love for cartoon shows designed to sell the latter product back in the 80's where it belongs! Bring on the fat kid and lets have another entertaining movie thanks Mr Bay, its about as good as this stuff gets unless you're a sad, juvenile, closet homophobic with a love for male robots indulging in phallic WWF/WWE style pantomime fights!
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The insults really add to your argument. Your incredibly literate argument is incredibly persuasive in between the "dipshits" and "fucks" and other insults. You have convinced me that a movie that managed to make $300mm plus in the US alone wasn't entertaining at all. Since you claim to be in the "biz" yourself, then recognize that many trends on here (this site) are common. There is trepidition for "reimagining" stuff from the 70's and 80's that many of us that grew up during that time period held dear--especially if it fails (and usually does) to meet our collectively unrealistic expectations (that usually have to do with making the film more "adult" ala Batman Begins--argubly the fanboys epitome of great redos). I felt that with the Phantom Menace--UNTIL I went back and watched the original Star Wars a few times and realized it was no masterpeice of acting/plot as well. I also realized that because I remember seeing the original when I was 3 and how it shaped those years there was no way a movie today could have the same impact. Anyway I digress. The Transformers film worked because it was entertaining; they audience judged it upon first view, and they went back because it was a fun movie. They watched it with friends and family on DVD a couple of times because its ENTERTAINING. There have been similar big budget movies that someone put a lot of effort into that didn't work for me (I.E. Spiderman 3, Pirates 3)personally but worked for other people. It doesn't mean they were offensive pieces of crap. I just thought they weren't entertaining. I am not going to whine and be pissed off about it though becuase I don't think it was purposeful output just to make a buck. I think there was honest effort there that just didn't work. I clasify Transformers as the same yet it worked for me. I agree that there are movies that completely digress and vere from the spirit of source materials (E.G. see Aliens vs. Predator) and were just made to make a buck. The best way to see if a big blockbuster movie works is if you have kids, and you take them to see it, and THEY think its frigging fantastic. My son (age 4) for example loves frigging Anakin Skywalker and Ben-10. He was bored with Spiderwidck Chronicles and doesn't like Harry Potter yet. He loved the Transformers, do I bag on him becuase he doesn't tell me "Dad, it had good effects, but doesn't have enough emotional weight for my tastes). No! he just liked the big visual action, which in our day was Star Wars, Raiders, etc. Anyway, this was likely an utter waste of time.
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You said what I wasted all that time on in about 10 seconds. Bravo!
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You're my hero."unless you're a sad, juvenile, closet homophobic with a love for male robots indulging in phallic WWF/WWE style pantomime fights!"I'm glad you've discovered women too. Whew!
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This is the best news Ive had all day.
Fucking love these guys, this shits gonna be ill as fuck and twice as shitting hot. -
Apr 30, 2008 2:05:21 PM CDT
I hope Transformers 2 is three times worse than the first...
by el mamerro
...and makes 5 times the amount of money. God you people are retarded.
Bring it on, Bay. I'm game for this shit, the first one was a blast. -
Apr 30, 2008 2:09:29 PM CDT
Michael Bay's directing sucks ass...
by waitingimpatientlyforingloriousbastards
And if you thought Transformers was entertaining, it really doesn't say much for your taste in movies. I'll be the first to say" to each his own," but that garbage was almost unwatchable for me...
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... that Transformers was a shitty movie because it was based on a shitty cartoon? Ok, I get it. That actually makes sense. Now, the question is why bother making a movie based on a shitty cartoon? Ah, right! Money. Ok, But why not try to make a decent movie based on a shitty cartoon? Can we at least get some female masturbation jokes next time?
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Notice that in all Bay films there is always some big ensemble cast of dudes and then like 1 chick? Save for the chick astronaut in Armageddon who was pretty much a dude?
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Probably Bay's way of saying, "I wish I was Howard Hawks."
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Can we collect money and send Bay to Los Angeles Film School? It may help him and it will also help keep food on Harry and Yoko's table?
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Your taste is likely different then us "aholes" who liked Transformers, yet I bet we still like many of the same movies. But alas, no, you will insult me and say I am an idiot becuase I don't like what you like. You know what this reminds me of, politics! As a middle of the road kind of guy, I do notice the correlation between venomous liberals on this site who unabashedly insult the outnumbered right wingers who try to defend themselves and the "ruin my childhood" fanboys/film lovers with ahem, "taste" who bash the rest of us. :O Hmmm....
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I think it was Vern who said it best, we need some tension for it to be comic "relief". What a piece of shit this Transformers movie turned out to be, huh.
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Don't let your hate for the popcorn-movie directing and dialogue get smeared onto him. Remember, you guys can't have Christian Bale in every movie.
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Not their human sidekicks.
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youre all absolutely right...we all grew out of our 80's diapers and realized how crappy a movie version of the cartoon would be....the first one was amazing and i for one got that giddy feeling i was watching my favorite show in real life...haters will hate, but then again when u live in your moms basement and are too geeky to get a woman and spend the rest of your potato chip eating, soda guzzling life wondering if real pussy looks the same as it does in porn..u tend to get ur panties in a bunch when a movie isnt exactly what u jerked urself off every nite dreaming about then god forbid michael bay disappoints you......transformers 2 will be 10 times as awsome as the first....... and seriously it really shows how much all u haters hate actors that find success...first shia, and now jonah hill. they are both on the way up, bigger roles in bigger movies......but on the subject of christian bale, did anyone see "equilibrium" ??? fucking awesome
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Wasn't that Anthony Anderson's COUSIN? And didn't Jazz say, "What's CRACKIN', little bitches?"
-No, I'm just playing. In all seriousness, I did not like much of that stuff at all. It was, to a very high extent, half-assed film-making. Far too much human stuff and over-the-top sexual humor. But you left out the repeated use of Linkin Park. I wasn't down with that, either. But I agree with you on most counts. -
Jewfroformers
More than meets the eye
Jewfroformers
Goyim in disguise -
You had to have seen the movie more than once to remember all those. Quick answers: did not care that much about any of them to feel offended. I have seen MUCH worse. actually thought the Indian operator and the GW scene were funy. "my bad" was so five years ago, vanishing decepticons was simply sequel proofing and editing. Brother through the window--whats the big deal? Piss jokes--make KIDS laugh. Same with fart and masturbation jokes (that one just hit too close to home for the fanboys :)). Seriously, if you have to look for the "reality" and believe in giant friggin living robots anyway, then why does it take so much to "stretch" and believe all of the pop culture lame-o rip offs. After all Optimus did say they learned our language from the internet/TV. The last time I had to sit through any crappy nickolodeon/disney channel show or other situation comedy, they are usually chalk full of pop culture lameness. Most of it wasn't that big of a deal to me. Again, I wasn't going into the movie looking for Oscar winning material. I was looking for a fun blockbuster that entertained.
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Apr 30, 2008 4:17:40 PM CDT
Plus transformers ruled: It had frigging Aaron Pierce in there
by mjayace
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unabated.
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Have David Hasslehoff walking down the street near the action. Then have a car transform and run off while saying something wack. Then have Hasslehoff turn to the camera and say "A talking car? Thats crazy". You can just write me a check now, Michael Bay. Also, they better work in Prime saying "these pretzels are making me thirsty" this time, or there is no justice.
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You just gave Bob Orci an idea.
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This time, instead of one ass, there's two of em. Hope you retards enjoy it.
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Yet, TF earned more overseas while Batman Begins (which I loved by the way--don't get me wrong--its just a good example of a film that "met fanboy expections") earned less overseas. If you guys' arguments are right and those of us who like popcorn pics like these are idiots, I wouldn't say its just America that is dumbing down.
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It doesn't bother me too much that it is not exactly in keeping with the old cartoon or comic or toys. I care that it's shittily written. I'm tired of hearing "popcorn" used to mean "poorly written with cool 'splosions".
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is what most of you are - there it is - the truth. You all love to bitch and whine about Transformers and how much it sucked and how much you hated. In reality you loved it but it's now cool to bash.
BTW You will all line up to see TF 2 as well, then run home to wank over it.
So will I - but I thoroughly enjoyed the first one and aint afraid to say so.
PS I dont live in my mums basement - I own 3 houses bitches -
We all Learned to Hate Bay and his Lady-Boy Beard! http://tinyurl.com/5u3wz8
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Seemed more like an ultimatum than an advertisement. "Do the Dew..or die!!!"
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... wasn't he the little bastard screaming, "this is like 1000X cooler than Armageddon!"?
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Got burned the first time.
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Apr 30, 2008 5:24:06 PM CDT
This is a sign that the script has more problems than the first
by alwaysthere
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For the people defending the movie on it's popcorn movie status, I will say that I went in expecting only that which I expect out of any movie: to be entertained. And it failed. It failed because random movement on the screen is not enough to entertain me. Because even a good popcorn movie contains elements that distinguish it from bad popcorn flicks. Elements like: well shot and framed action scenes, main characters that are distinguishable, and making me care just enough about the protagonists to get me to root for them over the bad guys. Transformers was bad in my opinion, not because it was a popcorn flick, or because I went in with too many expectations, but because it failed at so many basic levels of film-making. To me, it was a bunch of disconnected and poorly shot scenes of random movement. If the standard by which I judge popcorn flicks is reduced to how much random movement is involved, I think I'd be better off saving the seven bucks and poking anthills in my back yard with a stick.
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^^jersey nailed it on the fucking head (as did galva with the 'ASS: the movie, Part II' analogy). Our society is truly ass-fucked to consider TRANSFORMERS anything even remotely resembling a good movie.
And there is no way that Jonah Hill needs the money that badly. -
and kinda acted like him too. HA.
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especially Tracks.
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no monopoly - just hard work my friend
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Fucking do it! The 1st one was fun and this one will shape up to be even better if you're in it. Do it Jonah!
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I haven't read it but I heard that the Decepticon Police Car (?Barricade) is destroyed by Prime *in the novel*. So that's sorted then.
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at least there's somebody here who can see the reasons the movie sucked
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What if they spent millions and millions of dollars making a movie...and no one came to see it...Let's find out!!! I know what I'm doing opening day and any other day that Bay has a movie in theaters... READING A BOOK!!!
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AGAINST MICHAEL BAY! IF I WAS A CODER FREAK I COULD MAKE THE ONLINE SIGN UP FORM. IT WOULD BE ALL PROTESTY AND IT WOULD BE IN ALL CAPS TO SHOW HOW LOUD WE'RE PROTESTING HIM TO. THEN WE CAN ALL RALLY AT THE OPENING OF GAYFORMERS 2 WITH PROTEST SIGNS AND WE CAN ALL SHOUT "HELL NO, WE WON'T PAY, IT'S MICHAEL BAY"!!!!
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HELL NO, WE WON'T PAY IT'S MICHAEL BAY. HELL NO, WE WON'T PAY IT'S MICHAEL BAY. HELL NO, WE WON'T PAY IT'S MICHAEL BAY. HELL NO, WE WON'T PAY IT'S MICHAEL BAY. HELL NO, WE WON'T PAY IT'S MICHAEL BAY.
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If the list of "characters" DID NOT tell you how awful this movies is going to be, I really don't want to see what fucked up "bay versions" of the Constructicons will be rammed down our throats. The #1 SUCKED MONKEY ASS! BAY'S A DOUCHE! Realistic? Bay wanted realistic looking robots yet what we got were even worse than any cartoon, comic or toys EVER produced. Bay, take your head out of your ass and stop trying to feed us the shit you eat. The storyline sucked. The camera angles sucked. The Transformers designed SUCKED MAJOR ASS! And your human characters suck Unicon cock! I would prefer an anime/cartoon version of the TRANSFORMERS than another putrid 10yr old style jokes and stupidity BAYFORMERS 2!
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The first half is a total abominatiob and painful to watch, but the 2nd half... the half with the Transformers... isn't all that bad. Just get rid of 95% of the humans and give the robots mopre time and you have a decent flick.
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The film the game the movie!
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is less humans and robots bustin shit up. I loved the first flick, it was mindless fun and that's all Transformers the series really was, mindless fun. So long as Bay doesn't hold back on the Robots bustin shit up, I'm there.
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Apr 30, 2008 11:16:52 PM CDT
If you were the same age as when you loved Transformers cartoons
by moto
... You would have flipped out in the best of ways over the first Transformers. You would have gone to see it over and over again. You wouldn't have cared about the changes. You wouldn't have cared about the camera angles. You wouldn't have a problem with Shia. You would have fucking loved it.
Let's face it people... you outgrew Transformers. It's not the fault of Bay or Shia or whomever. YOU outgrew Transformers.
You're in your thirties... late twenties maybe. You've grown up.
You are more cynical. You enjoy more "adult oriented" material. You may have fun in your life, but the wonder aspect of your youth may be slipping away. You can no longer take the good and leave the bad from a movie. Therefore you believe that Transformers should age the way you have. You expect it to live up to your memories, which by the way, have been altered drastically over the years of aging and the contamination of nostalgia.
I watched seasons of the cartoon before the Transformers movie came out. While I cherish them, I just don't see how anyone can say that the source material is the holy grail. It's actually quite redundant if you think about it. But because it was part of our childhood when we saw the world around us differently, we're willing to overlook the "cheese" factor evident in each and every episode (see any Dinobot episode). But you're an adult now. Cynical. You live in an age where the internet gives you the opportunity to pick apart and thrash little snippets of images and story bytes. You build a hatred for the movie before you see more than two minutes of footage.
Transformers, in my eyes and about $500 million worth of others, was a fun action packed flick with something we haven't seen on the big screen in live action before. Flawed at times, yes (John Tuturro was terrible, the 5 minute sequence with the Autobots hiding from Sam's parents was out of place, etc.), but hey, it was a far step ahead of the quality of the source material. Comics were better yes, but it's difficult to pull off a non human story for the mass audience.
I understand why you may not have liked it. It went against much of what you remember that you loved. But again, if you were to watch that movie during the period where you loved the toys and cartoons the most, you would have flipped out in the best of ways.
That's why you'll never be happy with nostalgia nuggets turning into movies. You'll hate G.I. Joe too... because Shipwreck won't be having conversations with his parrot, Snake Eyes won't be break dancing, Quick Kick won't be running around barefoot with nothing but cargo pants and a red sash on, Cobra won't be having a "Cobrathon" with Zartan and the Dreadnocks as a heavy metal band, etc. etc. etc. Transformers succeeded because they took the core concept that we all grew up loving (Transforming robots waging war on earth... Autobots vs. Decepticons... robots in disguise as Earthly vehicles) and placed it into the real world. The transformers came to life.
Not everything can be a dark, mysterious, violent, cynical, hard edged, rated R, Matrix-like flick. The source material wasn't that... so thankfully the movie wasn't either. It was a fun ride and the sequel will be even better now that the origin story is done.
Getting old is a bitch. Challenge yourself and don't look at ANY Transformers 2 scoops, leaks, etc. READ NOTHING. No images. Nothing. And go in without a year or two worth of pent up preconceived anger and resentment. Trust me, it's a whole different experience. That's the way we USED TO go into a movie back in the eighties. And that is why those movies stand the test of time. -
Dude. Are you telling me you and your friends have never riffed on how much you dislike Michael Bay films? Don't take it.
P.S. Lock Michael Bay out of the editing room please. -
Correction then ... the dumbing down of the world continues unabated, with the possible exceptions of China and India. Man are we in trouble ...
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A movie stands the test of time because it's good. Transformers is not going to be looked back fondly by anyone, especially when it's knocked out of the public consciousness by the next Special Effectstravaganza. Back to the Future, Ghostbusters, Raiders of the Lost Ark, Gremlins, Cloak and Dagger, The Goonies are just a few examples of the amazing family films that came out When I was a kid. Movies for all ages, with great characters, stories, and effects that still stand up beautifully today (well, maybe not Cloak & Dagger, but, damnit, I love that movie). The idea that Transfomers is somehow the equal of these films and only unappreciated because we've either lost our inner-child or read too much about the film ahead of time is just laughably wrong.Transformers isa bad movie. Not because it doesn't have an Oscar worthy script, but because it has a shitty script. It's cool that you liked it. But it's still a shitty movie and I really have a hard time believing that 20 years down the road anyone posting here today is going to want to sit down and give it another viewing. There'll have been many movies since then with better action and special effects and it's certainly not the script that's going to keep people coming back for more.
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Well said... but I wasn't saying that Transformers was going to stand the test of time like the movies you mentioned. Not at all, at least not compared to those.
I was just making the point that many people didn't connect with Transformers the movie because they had expectations that mirrored their current more cynical lifestyle compared to when they were actually into Transformers the cartoon and toys... a time when wonder and excitement was a bit different.
I was also making the point that the source material that so many TBers hold close to their heart isn't what they really remember it to be or claim it to be. And hey, I'm a die hard fucking Transformers fan. That was my childhood. But claiming that the series was some type of mythical masterpiece and Bay's Transformers paled in comparison to it is laughably wrong. If anything, Bay's Transformers took it to a more mature level (despite the fart and piss jokes mind you). He made it accessible to people of all ages.
Movies exist to entertain. Plain and simple. People go see a drama to be touched and inspired. They see a comedy to laugh. They see an action adventure to cheer. Transformers delivered on its promise to entertain. For fans, it delivered the core concept of Transformers.
But it's just interesting to think how our minds change as we grow older. How memories aren't really representative of how things really were. We hold the cartoons and toys on this pedestal, and when they are being revived 20 years later, our older more cynical and more "mature" minds, likes, and dislikes alter what we really loved about the source material in the first place.
Either way, now that the movie came out and the origin story is done, I'm thinking Transformers 2 will be fucking huge. It will be closer to what TBers wanted in the first place (more robots, less human storylines). But let's face it, changes are necessary. And because of TBers nostalgia factor, they will hate anything that isn't close to what they remember. -
You get +5,000 cool points for mentioning Cloak and Dagger. I loved that movie as a kid. A set of secret plans hidden in a video game.... your dad, or someone who looks like him, being a super spy. Such a cool movie, gotta put that on my Netflix queue.
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In an hommage to Superbad, Jonah Hill pulls away from a tender dance with Bumblebee just in time to see a quarter-sized oil stain on his doughy jeaned thigh. The resurrected Jazz quips "Look like it dat time o' the month!" and Shia and Jonah immediately start a slap fight as to who is the robot's bitch.
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Like the "popcorn movie" one. We've all seen great popcorn movies. We hope to see some this summer. In my review I listed alot of the classics, those are my favorite types of movies and I don't look down on something for being a "popcorn movie." But you can't just automatically like a movie for fitting a category, you have to hold it to some kind of standards. Either that or you can't criticize BATMAN AND ROBIN, SPEED 2, AVP, LEAGUE OF EXTRAORDINARY GENTLEMEN etc. etc.
I mean, if you didn't like Batman's nipples that means you're a basement dweller? Come on people, have some god damn self respect. You are better than these nonsensical cliches you're tossing out.
And then there's the "you grew out of it" argument. Or the guy whose 4 year old liked it. That's great, I'm glad he enjoyed it and you got your money's worth. But he's 4 years old. I'm sure he liked ALVIN AND THE CHIPMUNKS and GARFIELD and what not and watches some shows with guys painted up in blue or dressed as animals playing little ukeleles and counting leaves and balloons and shit. Do you expect adults to enjoy whatever a 4 year old likes? Why? Would you attack us for not being into Thomas the Tank Engine?
And then there's the "well the cartoon was shit" or the "it's just about robots, it's supposed to be garbage" or the "it's a commercial for cars and Mountain Dew and toys, what did you expect?" Okay, but then why did YOU like it? That's a headscratcher man. It's a year later and I still don't get these ones.
Also a new one: I make a naive plea for Jonah Hill to choose integrity over a paycheck and I get told "blow it out your ass." What the fuck man, now even dignity and integrity are "gay" to you fuckers? -
on the Superbad commentary.
Stupidly, Apatow brought his daughter to the recording session. He & the kid on one coast, Jonah on the other coast with the rest of the guys, and for some inexplicable reason thought they should all try to NOT swear because of his daughter. On the commentary for an r rated movie. Actually, no, UNRATED - it was the DVD. Apatow tried to hide behind the proposition to Jonah to "try to be funny without the crutch of swearing" (actually I'm just paraphrasing there). Which was a big pussy way of deflecting attention from what a monumentally dumb decision he'd made in bringing his kid.
Anyway Hill can't help slipping every once in a while (remember they can't see the kid, and she doesn't talk unless spoken to), and Apatow storms out.
So. Either it's one of the most amazing things I've ever heard on a commentary, or Apatow is a fucking deadpan genius (with a spot-on impersonation of his own daughter) who pulled a brilliant bit of on-the-fly stuff worthy of his days on Larry Sanders. And even if it was all a joke, it backfired because he just comes off like a regular arsehole who put someone in a completely unfair situation.
Good on ya Jonah for calling him out.
Jesus I hope I remembered it right, seeing as I can't even recall the kid's name! -
Who was the new Belushi. Which is to say, he might want to skip straight to rehab.
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...screw you, moto. OK, that was harsh, just because your name is the first noise I hear from my cell phone alarm every morning, I think I took it out on you. But, screw your argument, at least. I know Transformers. Back in my pre-raped childhood, Transformers was a friend of mine. And that movie with the kid from Project Greenlight, that was no Transformers, sir. That was at best a Go-Bots movie. Not that I hated it, it was cool to look at in the same way it would be cool to watch porn from a highly advanced evolved cyborg civilization, like those aliens from AI, but that doesn't mean it would make for a good movie. I don't even think Transformers had an actual plot. And if you took out the names and identifiable Transformers insignias and Peter Cullen, people probably wouldn't have even recognized it as Transformers. Hopefully they change that for the sequel, and actually make a movie about the Transformers cartoon I used to watch, but I am not holding my breath.
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How many unfunny black stereotypical phrases are we gonna hear in this one, Mr. Bay? A robot saying "Oh no you didn't!" or "Autobots in da hooouuuse'!" I swear Michael Bay and George Lucas should co-write a script called "I Be Done Seen 'Bout Everytang" starring Jar Jar Binks as a chicken loving crack dealer with a dream of someday owning his own grape soda company. I mean, damn those guys are brilliant but very lacking in their cultural sensitivity.
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You know you've done something right.
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Damn You Michael Bay
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I didn't. That gives me the right to criticise it. Which I do.
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is a cocksucker
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Jumped the shark thinking he was good enough to host SNL, even after Seth Rogan was Dane Cook bad. Thats not saying much for SNL has been crap for awhile.
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Same jokes everyone else uses. I really hope internet cartoon makers start making funny shorts. Everyone's an expert/comedian. Yes, that includes me.
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brought his daughter..."
Dumbass. -
the Bay movie was, I saw Iron Man yesterday and can't understand how Bay made something of huge scope for 25 mill LESS than IM. Inflation doesn't explain it and neither do actors' paycheques. Iron Man is a much much 'smaller' movie. Aaaaanyway...
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People criticized Transformers for straying from the source material before the movie came out. Once it was actually released, that became item #999 on the list of 1000 reasons why this movie is shit. It no longer matters that the movie wasn't true to the cartoon because it failed so miserably in every other possible area a film can fail in.Also, sorry about the weird post without any text. I was in a bit of a hurry this morning and mistakes were made...
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While I haven't heard the commentary you speak of, I have seen tons of footage of Apatow "fighting" with his stars, as well as scenes where they make it look like people like Cera and Franco were supposed to be in Knocked Up, but they got into "fights" with the director...who usually winds up storming out of the room. So I'm pretty sure that is a bit, based only on your description.
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You and I are on the same page exactly. Vern, my point about my kid liking it is that 20 years from now he will probably look on the SW prequels, transformers, lord of the Rings, etc like those of us in our gen look on the original SW, ET, Raiders, etc. I was never saying that there weren't/aren't ANY crappy movies made. I just didn't think TF was one of them and usually the reasons that people cite have to do with their expectations and letdown because the film didn't meet them. Same thing happened with Phantom Menace. YOu all may be right in that 20 years from now it could be remembered as crap, even though it was successful at the time (King Kong 76 anyone?). Out here.
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"Love is in the air..."
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Moto: Man, god knows I've spent time trying to explain the same concept of nostalgia to people, and it just doesn't register for them. They seem unable to comprehend that their brains when they were little were completely different, psychologically and chemically, from what they are now, and thus their receptivity to entertainment was on an entirely different level. I was a kid of the 80's as well, and my fondness for the classics of that era will never die out. But I understand that when I saw these movies, the impression they left on me was fundamentally different from the impression that every single movie from then on would ever cause. This is not only true of movies, but of pretty much everything. It's what causes the "good ol' days" mentality that is present in every single generation.
It's impossible to watch our childhood classics again with objective eyes. The magic, the butterflies in the stomach are still there, and it's impossible to judge whether that's attributable to superior filmmaking, or a reawakening of memories from an era in the life cycle that's inherently full of wonder. People immediately want to side with the former, but I'm not so sure that's always the case.
In any case, I think a lot of people's gripes with the movie are not just in how it handled the source material, but with the filmmaking in general. I'll get to that now.
Vern: Dude, your review of the movie was fucking brilliant. It was one of the funniest, most heartfelt things I've ever read regarding movies, and I linked everyone I knew to it. I'm sorry dude, but I fucking loved the movie. There was something about it so scattershot, so out of control ridiculous, that I couldn't keep a huge grin off my face for the entire duration of it. Any time there was a robot on screen, even if it was a close up of its underarm with a bunch of random auto parts, the only thing I could think was "Holy shit, this is fucking bananas". I haven't had that kind of feeling in a movie for a very looooong time. Different people are stimulated by different things and thus what I find exciting is not gonna be the same for everyone, and I don't get outraged or even mildly surprised when I see it happen. I perfectly understand why you and a lot of detractors felt the way you did with the movie, and your observations were pretty dead on, which is why I found them hilarious. However the overall impression I came away with was one of giddiness, not disappointment.
Some people didn't care the slightest bit about the robots' styles and transformations. They just saw random car parts moving around (your best observation was the ball of junk rolling down the street), and that didn't do absolutely anything for them. Me, I've probably watched Prime's 360° power slide transformation in slo-mo over 30 times, just to observe the detail. I find it fascinating. The movie is chock full of moments like that, and that's like heaven to me.
I'm not even gonna get into Ironhide's slo-mo flipping moment. Actually I will. I firmly believe that every single cinematic advance and achievement in cinematography since the dawn of the zoopraxiscope was made only so that this shot would one day become a reality. Go back and look at that shit. Missiles, explosions, tits, wind-swept hair, flipping robots, tracking, panning, flare, slo-motion, incredible sound design (Ironhide's transformation sound right before he flips off is the single best sound effect in the movie, excellent homage to the classic transformation sound with a nice updated twist), it just goes on. That shot makes me shit my pants every single time, which is starting to become a little inconvenient. The other day I met a TF crew member working on a shoot near where I live, and he told me the girl wasn't even supposed to be in that shot, that Michael Bay plucked her out of the extras and put her in there last minute only so he could score with her later night, and that makes the shot double awesome.
To finish off, someone up there wrote a big list of points where the movie went overboard with silliness, and quite frankly, I didn't care for any of that shit. I was too busy watching Starscream stomp ass. In any case, seeing the 6-year-olds in the front row laugh at Bumblebee peeing on John Turturro turned my cringe into a genuine smile. As long as someone's enjoying it, I'm good. -
That stuff you mention is definitely deadpan for laughs, and there's the great dinnertable scene where I think Cera goes batty, but that's a rip on the real-life thing where the director of Three Kings has a 4-year-old hissy fit on the set of I heart Huckabees & Lily Tomlin gives as good as she gets while Dustin Hoffman ducks for cover. It's on Youtube and it's fantastic, but I'd give anything to have seen George Clooney punch him out on Kings. Apparently he's "much better now". They used Cera for the dinner thing 'cause, well, who's more likeable and seemingly non-combative than him?!
Actually, even better than the Clooney/Russell thing is when Jon Lovitz (of all people) punched out Andy Dick for being, well, a...
Back to Superbad, all those straightfaced shenanigans are a good reason why I'm confused. Sure it could easily have been a setup, but the payoff doesn't seem clever enough- Apatow just comes off like a jerk, rather than, uh, a clever writer pulling an involved stunt where he comes off like a jerk but with the same dynamic as your reaction to a talented but self-effacing person. You still think they're that talented, but appreciate the absence of hubris. Maybe he's just too damn good for me.
And now that I've bleached the life out of it... -
Jonah Hill is HILARIOUS. Much better than having Anthony Anderson...
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it will still be a Bay-shitfest
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You're kidding right? Cause that is the assiest statement I've read all day. Have you even seen a John Belushi movie lately? I'm not idolizing the guy here either; he was worlds above Farley and universes above Hill. Farley was definitely funny but hell and gone from Belushi unless you're saying these guys are heir apparent because they're fat and take comedic roles. When Bluto walks down the stairs wearing his Toga and that guy is playing the "I gave my love a cherry"...the look on his face as his eyes roam left and right. Then his look when he apologizes. Comedic perfection. Bluto's reaction when the JD bottle slips off the bar and breaks. Farley and Hill are more bombastic and gag-based in their comedy (ie fatty falls down or fatty wears funny clothes or fatty screams like a girl, etc). Animal House isn't the best comedy ever of course...but Belushi was probably the best sloppy/chubby comic actor of all time. No one else comes close.
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But being jaded has nothing to do with it. Why? Because I can recognize how a child playing with his transformers toys, writing his own stories in his head, can be entertained with that.
But as we get older, the only way we are entertained by the kid playing with his transformers action figures, is by thinking how cute it is, not because we're actually interested in the story he's weaving in his own mind, because it likely doesn't make a lick of sense anyway. Considering how each child's 'story' is going to be 100% unique, seeing someone else's version of their childhood playtime stories just isn't going to bring back the nostalgia, either.
And that's what Bay's Transformers was. It was some kid's playtime story writ with a multi-million dollar brush. Unfortunately, none of the rest of us had the same story going on in our heads as a child, so to us it's still alien and nonsensical.
The only way to make a good Transformers movie is to use a few more mature (note, mature does not equal cynical) observations on the nature of good film-making and storytelling - making a story that can appeal to things people in general can identify with. Until that film arrives, Transformers will always be the "best story conceived out of the mind of a 6 year old that nobody else, not even other six year olds, can identify with". -
Agreed. A movie like "Pirates", even though expectations couldn't have been lower (a movie based on a theme park ride?!?) it managed to succeed because it gave us characters we cared about and could root for or jeer at (mostly embodied in the characters of Jack Sparrow and Barbossa, respectively). It had a story that was internally consistent, even if it was absurd, and it offered a lot of well-shot action set pieces. Both "Pirates" and "Transformers" are based on relatively weak source material, but the difference in the quality of storytelling betrays the lie that lowered expectations somehow justifies shoddy execution.
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and drinks more beer, and burps, and gets drunk and falls down alot. Also, the kids say stuff like "dickface". How about Chewbacca? The whole concept was a big walking dog with 70's shag carpet for fur. All the same corny stuff was in those movies too. You just didn't care back then.
Maybe not quite as much, but then we weren't as attention deficit as kids today. -
don't forget when Elliot introduces ET to BOBA FETT. But that's certainly not a pop culture reference. no way. Nor is elliot's kiss with that girl in the wind at school. No gone with the wind moment there.
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Transformers is not. Hence the difference!
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So there's no difference in Elliot introducing Bobba Fett to ET to a horse drawn "lamborghini" with sizzor doors in Shrek? One isn't "matter of fact" and the other isn't "wink wink, nudge, nudge"? One doesn't make you go "Trippin!" and the other make you roll your eyes? Except...in Elliot's world...Bobba Fett is an action figure...in Shrek's world...a fucking lamboghini has no place other than making the mouth breathers go "Whoa...a lamborghini with horse....cool.". See the difference? In Return of the Jedi...in a galaxy far far away and a long long time ago...fucking Chewbacca does a god damn Tarzan yodel but that's exactly the same as those kids in ET playing D&D? Opinions aside...you need to get the ass out of your eyes.
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If he had only done the bit with Cera, I think I could buy into the idea that the thing with Hill was "real", but he did the same thing with Franco, and that one wasn't very funny either. He has also been doing the fake asshole thing when promoting Sarah Marshall and braging about how he can force actors to show their penis and whatnot. I tend to think the very idea that he brought his kid to a Superbad commentary is the joke (or attempted joke). Although again, I haven't actually heard it, so I could be totally wrong. P.S., does the Superbad DVD have lots of extras of Micheal Cera dancing like they showed in the previews but didn't include in the movie?
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Good points. Yes, Transformers was no masterpiece nor was it even close. There were huge misteps in the likes of John Tuturro's hammy performance, the Autobots hiding from Sam's parents (obviously taken from Iron Giant),the way Jazz was handled, etc.
But what captured my awe and excitement were the moments when the autobots arrived, crashing down to earth and finding their vehicle males.
The Scorpokon (sp?) scenes. The military sequences were excellent.
Shia held the human side of the movie together. I don't care what any TBer says, the dude can act and has impeccible comedic timing... he's a young John Cusack. Check out Disturbia, Holes, and The Greatest Game Ever Played. TBers focus on his terribly written minor parts in Charlie's Angels, Constantine, etc. Plenty of TBers' favorite actors have been in shit roles. It happens.
The Autobots vs. the Decepticons in the 3rd act... despite shaky photography, which was shot that way to induce the reality of the situation, the chaos factor. But hell, that freeway sequence was everything that I wanted to see in a Transformers live action movie.
And the end, which most TBers should be thrilled about. A promise that okay, the origin story has been told, now we're going to get to business.
I don't mind the changes made in the designs. Frankly, a near direct transfer from the source material would have looked fairly cheesy on film.
It's not about excusing the movie because the "source material sucked". You're not reading it right. It's about some TBers putting the source material on this pedestal and frankly, not properly recalling the quality of the source material itself. Everyone needs to go back and watch those episodes. The core concept of transforming robots battling on Earth is there... but the delivery is redundant at times and fairly dated/cheesy. I love it because that was a big part of my childhood, but the whole fanatic argument that Bay's Transformers wasn't as good as the source material is just plain wrong. They're just not happy simply because the movie wasn't made the way they wanted it to be.
It wasn't a great script. There were missed opportunities. But I got to see a live action Transformers movie with fucking brilliant effects that made it almost photorealistic. For me, those moments I mentioned above sold me on the movie. It ENTERTAINED me. There are PLENTY of movies we all like that are really just terrible as far as writing and filmmaking goes. That's my whole point. Who cares? If we enjoy it, why does it matter?
POINT BREAK, CLOAK AND DAGGER (Awesome bringing that up Killdozer), THE LAST STARFIGHTER, CONAN THE BARBARIAN, RAMBO MOVIES, COMMANDO, EXPLORERS, FRIDAY THE 13TH SEQUELS, NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET SEQUELS, LABRYNTH, MEATBALLS, ROCKY SEQUELS, ROADHOUSE, THEY LIVE, etc. etc. etc. The list goes on.
They entertained us. Plain and simple. In the end, that is what movies are made for. I will defend The Last Starfighter to my death, but I'm sure most people think it sucks. I HATED the Kill Bill movies, thought they were two of the most self aware movies out there... but many swear by them.
You can call a movie bad filmmaking ... but regardless, it's your own opinion. Based on your likes and dislikes. What you love and what you hate. Film is subjective. If it wasn't, we'd all think that Titanic and Forrest Gump were deserving of their Oscars but we know that this is not the case. There is a divide on that.
Anyway, you hate Transformers... not a problem. You enjoyed the hell out of it... good for you. -
Easy, killer, I'm just saying that Hill is the new go-to guy for funny fat man in a comedy. I know he's no Belushi, or even Farley, but the same suits who want us to accept limp wristed underwear models like Paul Walker as this generation's answer to Steve McQueen are going to try to sell us Hill as the new Farley/Belushi/Hardy/Arbuckle/Whoever.
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...except maybe the sound of your own whining. I was stunned to see you defend LOTR as a good example of fantasy moviemaking in some other talkback, except in hindsight I think you just said it was good because most people in that talkback were saying how it sucked.
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in part 1, anyway. As usual, instead of improving the film and paying attention to some of the complaints, I'm guessing they're taking the "it made a shitload 'o money so don't change a thing!" mentality. Like FF2.
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I mean I don't wanna sound gay or anything, but I find Megan Fox to be a very boring hot woman.
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MOTO, EL MAMMERO both great posts but u will soon realize its falling on dumb ears...realllllly dumb ears. most of these basement dwellers like to see their name repeat endless times down a talkback, even tho theyre never saying anything new or original. same hater fanboy crap
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Oh and he did the "everyone thinks Cera is an arsehole" thing too, and yes there's a whole making of bit about the dancing.
Maybe it's just because I thought the commentary thing didn't work like the others that I started to think it might be real as an internal excuse? Even I don't know what's going on in my head! -
Wow all new haterz here. I can't belive Bob is telling Vern to blow it out his ass, Bob has been one of saner cast members. Bob if your reading this Take the following comment with no disrespect to you as man or a professional and I dont know how much of what you wrote actually wound up on screen but lets call a spade, a spade. Transformers was a poorly written, poorly edited movie. What it suceeded in was being something new, in summer full of lacking sequels, with that Bay could have filmed himself taking Shit called it Transformers and it would have made 300 million domestic (which is pretty much what he did). Bay does not have what it takes to make a transformers Movie or to write or direct Characters that do not exist normally He can only deal with Character Actors which is the reason most of his stars do nothing more then play themselves instead of actually acting, so this Year anthony Anderson will replaced as Crazy Black guy with Jonah Hill as whiney Scared nerdy Jewish Kid.
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named "O". Is this who Hill is supposed to be? In Transformers #1, Buster was making out with his girlfriend and this guy was in the car with them when the drive-in movie theater they were at was attacked by Decepticons. He was a total 'blocker too, "can you guys stop lip-locking so I can see the movie?" or some such nonsense. His character sucked so hard that he was abandoned, never to be seen again after issue #4.
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