Cool News
Hell, Thy Name Be SPACE CHIMPS!!
Merrick here...
SO maybe I'm in a bad mood this morning, but I've watched this footage twice now and find nothing remotely amusing or creative.
Other than the fact that someone out there actually managed to put something on screen, which is never an accomplishment to be taken lightly, this looks wholly bankrupt.
I'M SORRY!!!
Whatever. I wonder if Space Chimps do this?
Kind of what I felt after watching VAN HELSING...
I'M SORRY!!!
Whatever. I wonder if Space Chimps do this?
Kind of what I felt after watching VAN HELSING...
-
+ Expand All
-
Andy samdumb
-
YEZ THEY DO
-
They already have the video game lined up for this.
-
Fly Me to the Moon? Seriously, how is it now that when it comes to computer animated movies they like always come in two? Starting with Antz and A Bugs Life, The Wild and Madagasgar. Finding Nemo and A sharks tale. Happyfeet and Surfs Up. Like these all can just be coincidence.
-
Bergman was supposed to do this back in 1965, but opted for "Persona" instead.
-
Apr 07, 2008 10:57:50 AM CDT
AND WHAT THE CHIMP PULLED FROM HIS ASS....
by greigy just wanted to say
Is still a million times better than anything McG is gonna come up with.
-
Go download the tune "Space Monkey" by John Prine. That will help ease the pain.
Much props to Laika...the Soviet Space dog who was the first Earther to be blast into space. Sadly she did not come back alive. There's a great story (I forget the name, but it's listed on Wikipedia) about an alien race that saves her from her fate. Way to go Aliens! -
is one of the best headlines ever
-
This film doesn't have any Michael Bay so it's not totally irredeemable.
-
I'd rather watch the My Bloody Valentine 3D reboot.
-
Could save this one. Razzie finalist, yes?
-
"One of the primates who brought you Shrek"
And everything becomes clear. Pop culture references, unfunny gags dragged out beaten to death resuscitated then murdered again and franchised to infinity and beyond as well as characters that have no charm or depth.
-
or my computer is a helluva lot slower than it was 2 minutes ago. Anyboy else not even get to the trailer? Jesus... don't I have anything better to do?
-
Apr 07, 2008 11:09:14 AM CDT
It's be funny if this was re-edited to Michael Jacksons 'Beat It
by ingloriousjedi
..or if Eddy Murphy did a voice over of what the monkey was thinking. Or both.
-
"CGI Kiddie Movie"
-
Not at a single thing on this entire page. Ugh. That movie looks absolutely atrocious and that clip was stupid and unneccessary. Hearing all those people laugh like total morons at the stupid chimp wasn't helping either. How embarassing.
-
Lancelot Link : Secret Chimp. That is all.
-
Jack In The Box, any one?
-
Too bad it doesn't look that way. Anyway, I rented Surf's Up this weekend with my son and was shocked at how good that was.
-
... to the movies since Marge Gunderson has breakfast there in Fargo.
-
Makes sense since Amtrak is always involved with TRAIN WRECKS!
-
...so basically it's like a film version of Merrick then?
-
but he's still Brock "Fuckin'" Samson, so he still gets my love.
-
But that's not hard to do. The clip above is about on par with Whedon's writing.
Space Chimps does still seem to suck, though. -
Great job! Bartender on the Southwest Chief! We had a tight crew, but management are a bunch of fucking civil servant losers that don't know shit on how to run a business. That's why Amtrak needs bailing out every year by your tax dollars. The union is shit and they need to get rid of the slackers to make a profit. Some asshole put an upright refrigerator on the tracks out of Albuerque and we slammed into it around the bend doing sixty. Everyone was out there, Alby PD, Feds, Amtrak PD. We were waiting for the Chicken Delight man next. Scary shit though. They change engineers every six hours and your six on twelve off, then you go back for six, yet you don't know when that six will be so it fucks with your sleep pattern. We hit either a person or a deer out of Scottsdale, AZ, and we had to stop the train to see if we could find the body. Being the Number 4 guy in charge guess who had to help look for it? I saw the blood and some of the meat, but we never found the body. Creepy shit, to say the least. Amtrak needs to spend money on getting their shit together instead of advertising space chimp movies. Maybe their looking for new employees. That's be about right. And if you can avoid it; don't take the Coast Starlight or Sunset Limited. Starlight is always 12 hours late, Sunset is always a day late.
-
I am so sick of studios using live chimps unnecessarily.
-
Apr 07, 2008 12:27:27 PM CDT
Uncapie, I sense the job was less than satisfactory
by shut the fuck up donny
I was having a conversation with my wife on why we haven't modernized the rail system like the Japanese (considering the state of the airlines), and then you went along and answered me!
Also, I have to ask what your job description looked like if they had you pouring drinks and searching for mutilated carcasses. -
Seriously.
-
Apr 07, 2008 12:29:58 PM CDT
"AND WHAT THE CHIMP PULLED FROM HIS ASS....Is still a million ti
by aethyrr
Hahaha totally agreed!
-
well...they let Eww Boll direct movies still...I guess it makes sense.
-
When will idiot studios and web designers learn? Just put the thing on Quicktime (not flash embedded) so people can actually watch it. I tried for ten minutes to load this crap and never did. YOU'RE ALL IDIOTS for choosing realplayer, flash, or any other crappy delivery method other than quicktime.
-
I'm sure some bright, talented people work there, but their animation quality is poorer than Dreamworks, and their story weaker than Blue Sky animation. If Pixar is Disney, and Dreamworks and Blue Sky are Don Bluth and Ralph Bakshi, then Vangaurd is the team who make "ALADDIN AND HIS MAGICAL LAMP" right before Disney makes "Aladdin".
-
may be a better title
-
..you damn video taping humans!!
-
Now with 50% more Charro!
-
People on this site go batshit crazy over some dud called Wall-E and here we have a movie called Space Chimps, probably the greatest title I've ever heard, and all you can do is bash it.
-
if AICN didn't think it was great.
Wait, what does Harry think? -
You knew it was coming.
-
they rape my childhood ! Bwuaaaaaaaa !!!! SPACE CHIMP IN NAME ONLY !!! DAMN YOU MICHAEL BAY !!!!
-
"Ham! I Saw It!"
-
And that monkey has bigger schnutz than all of the guys laughin' at him combined. He could kill a man with his sac.
-
monolith?
-
Apr 07, 2008 3:08:29 PM CDT
"All the chimps we sent into space came back super-intelligent."
by tallboy66
"No, I don't think we'll be telling them THAT!"
-
"Ha ha, the Indian guy's singing an old song I never heard before in his funny accent, get it? Now quick, buy me a Happy meal, McDonald's has the Space Chimps toys!"
-
I went to the site, and "Chimped myself." I feel unclean.
-
A leaner for sure.
-
Meet the Spartans II: Electric Space Chimpaloo
-
Homer Simpson got his wish. Commander in Chimp, Hail to the Chimp, Editor in Chimp, and now Space Chimps. Also, the youtube video reminds me too much of an ex-boss. Frightening.
-
...shitting out The Dark Knight or is that a behind the scenes look at where Nolan got the script?
-
...but the "Hammertime" bullshit at the site's intro didn't exactly inspire me. How is it possible to fuck up a movie called SPACE CHIMPS? This thing should have written itself!
-
I was wondering where hes been lately. Oh well. Hell taste better the next round.
-
http://www.trailerspy.com/movie-trailers/view/517/space-chimps-trailer/
-
Just weird stuff, but fun.
-
MUTHAFUCKIN' ROCKET RIGHT...FUCKING...NOW!!
-
Yep, Captain Simian was the first thing I thought of too.
-
Why not report on Snow Buddies and bitch about that?
-
Then thank God I skipped Cloverfield. Garfield the Movie was better than Transformers.
-
Well that was just lovely. No wonder the fundamentalists have such a problem with evolution.
-
Goes nicely with the space whales from Star Trek IV.
-
I worked at Sony and I passed on it then. What the fuck do I know, though?
-
The ranking system on the train is like this; 1.Conductor, 2.Engineer/Brakeman(You would think they'd be #1. They're at the helm.),3.Dining Car Manager, 4.LSA(Lounge Service Attendant...FUCKING BARTENDER IS WHAT IT IS!). Pay was good. Tips were great at Christmas. Amtrak is actually a private company that's subsidised by the government as they travel through the continental U.S. Each state has to kick in and so do the taxpayers to keep it running. Trains are 35 years old too, but those electric diesels are tough machines. We share the tracks with BNSF(They offered me a job as a conductor. Should have taken it.)so if they show up, we have to give them the right-of-way. That costs time. They were supposed to put in a L.A. to Vegas run bullet train. Built the tracks and everything, but the government pulled the plug on their financing because of the oil industry. That would have been a cash cow for everyone! Amtrak needs to be taken over by the government and that union needs to be given the boot. They had a guy at Chi Station that was stealing people's luggage and using the company card to stay in hotels when he wasn't working. He did this for a year! The guy got caught finally and all he got was 90 days probation and got his job back because he had tenure with the company. Then there was this supervisor that harrased a transexual employee and wanted to see her "vagina" operation! He was a shit. Napoleon complex.He was given the option to be fired or take early retirement.
Everyone hated that guy so the tranny did everyone a favor. Yeah, take the palne or drive. Fuck Amtrak and Space Chimps too! -
Oh, I see. Wow, did they ever squander a good title on some absolute bullshit here or what?
-
... but, truthfully, if you're going to make a movie about monkeys in space, the only way to have even the remotest chance of it being entertaining is to use REAL monkeys. I mean, that could still suck too but you gotta take the shot at the Lancelot Link styling. Again, that could still suck hard but you at least have a shot. Digitally animated chimp cartoon? No shot at all.
And that ape has a Carl's Juniors in his ass. "Don't bother me, I'm eating." -
Apr 07, 2008 10:26:30 PM CDT
i wish my balls were that big, i would put them on Michael Bay's
by ironhelix
-
push the LEFT button
-
Monkeys are NEVER, EVER funny.
-
that movie is looong overdue.
"We're jews, jews in space. zooming along, protecting the hebrew race!" -
used to eat horseshit all the time. And you could tell he knew it was so wrong, it was his guilty pleasure, you'd see him slinking over to a pile of horse shit cautiously looking around to make sure no one was watching, then he's scarf down some buscuits. Who knows, maybe it's an acquired taste, like eggrolls or curry. The first time you eat it, you're like 'fuck, this is nasty' but then at 4am you're awake in bed thinking 'you know, I could go for that again right now'.
-
Again with the lightspeed? Always you have to go so fast? Where are you going in such a hurry? Where could you possibly have to be that you need to go the speed of light to get there? Leave a few minutes early, that's what I say.
-
He apparently has promised to quit making movies if one million people sign a petition. Story link:
http://tinyurl.com/5mhgt7
Now here's a chance for the Boll haters to let their true feelings be known:
http://tinyurl.com/3h28dl
You know what to do. -
mwah haha haa
-
*monkey attacks man*
"That's what you get for not Hailing to the Chimp!" -
I got an Ape Drape yes I do....long live the Vandals!
-
shame its looks so awful.
-
Funniest shit I've read in a long time. Well done.
-
...hell I'd watch this twice before subjecting myself to the overwrought tripe of PT Anderson ever again.
Carry on, Space Chimps, carry on. -
could kick these chimps' collective asses. Did you see what he did to that mobster's car? Clyde, scrap the caddy. Right turn Clyde.
-
"That's what you get for not hailing to the Chimp!"
-
And Uncapie, that was an amazing post.
-
Apr 08, 2008 11:41:34 AM CDT
Uncapie you are totally reviving my interest in rail
by shut the fuck up donny
simply because I have a morbid fascination at this point to see what it would actually be like to ride Amtrak this day and age! Shame about the LA/Las Vegas bullet train, but I am not surprised about big oil haltering that experiment.
Anyways, enough about trains. What started as a terrible pun has clearly brought back some Post-tramumatic stress for you! -
My favorite episodes are "Space Pimps vs. the Black Ho'" and "Space Pimps and the Special Mission to Uranus". what? "chimps"? not "pimps"? well shit! who the fuck wants to watch that?
-
I always forget to count Spaceballs as Jews in Space. I mean Spaceballs had it all, a flying Winnebago, the scwartz, a coffee maker and a three ring circus. But the one thing that was missing was a flying Star of David spaceship. that is the coolest spaceship ever. Any movie that features a giant spacehip in the shape of a star of david is cool in my book, and I ain't even jewish. I know there are people out there who wished to have seen that in a feature length film! If we can get snakes on a plane, we can get jews in space! (hey even the Leprechaun made it to space, with hilarious results!)
-
Check and mate
Readers Talkback
User Login
Top Talkbacks
- Whitney Houston 1963 - 2012 -- 383 total posts 380 posts
- New JUDGE DREDD post production footage pops up -- 111 total posts 111 posts
- WTF HOLLYWOOD: SOLARBABIES -- 75 total posts 73 posts
- HANNA's Saoirse Ronan to boss around seven little people -- 71 total posts 68 posts
- Does ‘SNL’ Rhyme With ‘Deschanel’?? Learn Which SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE Vet Hosts After Sexy Zooey!! -- 77 total posts 55 posts
- If the Behind the Scenes Pics of the Day drops her pen, pick it up, but don’t look at her legs or else it will be on your record. -- 54 total posts 48 posts
- There's a STAR TREK video game that is going to lead into JJ's STAR TREK 2 apparently... -- 165 total posts 41 posts
- Herc’s Seen Tonight’s Return Of THE WALKING DEAD!! Discuss Also DOWNTON ABBEY, FEAR FACTOR, PAN AM, ONCE, SIMPSONS, DYNAMITE, LUCK, SHAMELESS, BAIT CAR, THE GRAMMYS And More!! Sunday Is Sweeps Day 11!! -- 41 total posts 41 posts
- To Commemorate The 3D Release Of STAR WARS EPISODE I: THE PHANTOM MENACE, George Lucas Wants You To Know...Greedo Shoots First!! -- 500 total posts 35 posts
- Avid Comic Reader Hercules Does Battle With Tedium During Kevin Smith’s COMIC BOOK MEN! -- 28 total posts 28 posts