Cool News
With 25 hours to go, God decides to level the camps throwing everything he had at us... And we're still seeing SWE1!!
Folks...
You know...
People have asked.... “Don’t you people have lives?”
Here’s my answer....
Tonight... God took a piss on us, and my lord it was
magnificient!
Word had it that a storm was coming. A wicked
storm. The type that Snoopy begins his tales with.
But only children are afraid of a flash of lightning and
a rumble of thunder... right?
When the rains began I was showing one fella the
EYES WIDE SHUT ShoWest footage in a cubby
hole chiseled out of the side of the
METROPOLITAN theater. Then... The rains came.
Vinyl-Boy, RoRo, Johnny Wad, Quint, Mr FanBoy,
Father Geek and I are all huddled together. When
Father Geek says, “The flaps are not all zipped up on
the tent... Our shit is gonna get wet!”
All of a sudden, I stare the sky in it’s bubbling toiling
eye and begin unbuttoning my shirt. I’m heading into
the, up to, 80 mph gale force winds with blinding rain
and a chance of golf ball size hail and tornadoes to
‘Zip up the Tent’ and ‘hold down the fort’!
Instantly the wind propells me past the tent, like
Buster Keaton, I lean into the wind at a ridiculous
angle whilst unzipping it. I dive in trying desperately
to see.... You see, at this exact moment, God took out
the lights. The theater, the parking lights....
EVERYTHING was plunged into darkness. Be very
fucking afraid. The dome tent was looking closer and
closer to a snowball stuck on the side of a brick wall,
with me as the wet center.
I struggle to feel around for the lamp. One of those
collapsable ones. I snap it open, twist the switch
and..... LIGHT! Hahahahaa! I scream with joy. I
can see!
The interior of the tent’s sides would range from
convex to concave, from Giger-esque to
O’Keefe-esque... I felt like I was trapped inside the
television set from VIDEODROME. The flapping
sound of gigantic leathery bat wings, thousands of
them filled my ears, driving me insane. I look about
for some candles to light to melt wax onto cloth to
stuff into my ears so I can pilot myself through this
storm like Captain Sinbad.... But there were no
candles.
Instead... I found my portable CD-Player. I get my
SINGING IN THE RAIN cd, advance to the Gene
Kelly ‘Singing in the Rain’ track (#20) hit repeat
mode and began singing along as I begin fixing up the
tent. Zipping and strapping. Moving items off the
ground of the tent and Up into the safer regions where
I lay.
I hear screams of terror, excitement and visceral
thrills coming from tents and people hiding all around
me. I turn the volume up, till all I can hear is Gene
Kelly... and a faint flapping of the pteradactyls
attacking my tent.
I begin making shadow animals on the animated sides
of the tent, when suddenly the Four Winds that live
above Crom decided to kick my ass. Until this point,
it was merely exciting... but tolerable.
This is when the gusts started coming from all sides
and.... My god, I was “Taya in da wind” like a naked
Clarice Starling on a camp.
A big poof levels my dome tent, snapping the poles in
a mighty crack. My arms shoot out to begin fighting
the interior of the tent. trying to keep some
semblence of protection. It wasn’t looking good.
Folks... I tell you at this point the Coleman lantern
was knocked off the cooler, Cds were getting wet and
I.... Well... I was all that stood between the roof of the
tent and the floor.
The wind was howling, picking up parts of the tent
and folding it. Waves of water were lifted off the
cement ground and washed over me. I could feel the
pools of water on the other side of the nylon
membrane. I was in a very violent womb.
The bungee cord pull downs were loose and in the
lightning blasts I could see their shadows pounding
about my head with a percussive “th th th thump!!!!”
Folks... It really doesn’t get any more remarkable. I
hear my AICN crew screaming, “HOLY SHIT! THE
TENT IS LEVELED! THEY’RE ALL LEVELED!”
I see shadows of chairs flying, inflated mattresses
floating in the air, and any second I expect my ass to
land on the fucking wicked witch of the east! Any
second Helen Hunt’s dad is gonna be swept up into
the twister. I’m in the shit.
Folks... If you think I camped for a movie, you are
sadly mistakened. I camped for THIS. An
experience, a thrill. The howling of winds, the
pounding of surf, wrestling with the elements. Sure
the chances of having a real life adventure alongside a
movie theater over the course of a scant few days is
not very likely....
But guess what? It happened. An intense visceral
experience that tells you that you’re alive, you’re
breathing, that life is a fucking blast... That adrenaline
is a damn amazing natural high! That, that which
does not kill you can entertain the living shit out of
ya!
The movie has always been secondary to me, it’s
been the line. WHat would happen, how would the
experience work? Would cities be leveled? Would
the world end?
And ya know... For over an hour tonight after the
wind broke that tent, and I clutched ahold of the poles
trying to wrestle them back into place and the Harpies
were tormenting me whilst my light went out and I
was as blind as Phinius and the Argonauts never
came. I was left to my own devices... And I liked it
that way!
It was my adventure. Me vs the BLAIR WITCH. Me
vs the terrible SAND STORM. Me upon the deck of
the Sea Wolf strapped to my wheel howling
obscenities and laughing like Wolf Larson.
Tonight is the life I lead. It doesn’t exist just in a
movie theater, but on the other side of the wall as
well. After this is posted... I’m heading back for
more. Just had to come home and let you hear about
it!
23 hours to go.... heh heh.... What a cool fucking way
to kick off the last 24! No more tents, just us and the
elements. Mano a Nature. And I wouldn’t have it any
other way. We’ve been through hell and high water...
and we’re seeing this movie. It may suck, it may
rock, but it’s the journey we take to see the movie that
really matters... and what an odyssey it has been....
People have asked.... “Don’t you people have lives?”
Here’s my answer....
Tonight... God took a piss on us, and my lord it was
magnificient!
Word had it that a storm was coming. A wicked
storm. The type that Snoopy begins his tales with.
But only children are afraid of a flash of lightning and
a rumble of thunder... right?
When the rains began I was showing one fella the
EYES WIDE SHUT ShoWest footage in a cubby
hole chiseled out of the side of the
METROPOLITAN theater. Then... The rains came.
Vinyl-Boy, RoRo, Johnny Wad, Quint, Mr FanBoy,
Father Geek and I are all huddled together. When
Father Geek says, “The flaps are not all zipped up on
the tent... Our shit is gonna get wet!”
All of a sudden, I stare the sky in it’s bubbling toiling
eye and begin unbuttoning my shirt. I’m heading into
the, up to, 80 mph gale force winds with blinding rain
and a chance of golf ball size hail and tornadoes to
‘Zip up the Tent’ and ‘hold down the fort’!
Instantly the wind propells me past the tent, like
Buster Keaton, I lean into the wind at a ridiculous
angle whilst unzipping it. I dive in trying desperately
to see.... You see, at this exact moment, God took out
the lights. The theater, the parking lights....
EVERYTHING was plunged into darkness. Be very
fucking afraid. The dome tent was looking closer and
closer to a snowball stuck on the side of a brick wall,
with me as the wet center.
I struggle to feel around for the lamp. One of those
collapsable ones. I snap it open, twist the switch
and..... LIGHT! Hahahahaa! I scream with joy. I
can see!
The interior of the tent’s sides would range from
convex to concave, from Giger-esque to
O’Keefe-esque... I felt like I was trapped inside the
television set from VIDEODROME. The flapping
sound of gigantic leathery bat wings, thousands of
them filled my ears, driving me insane. I look about
for some candles to light to melt wax onto cloth to
stuff into my ears so I can pilot myself through this
storm like Captain Sinbad.... But there were no
candles.
Instead... I found my portable CD-Player. I get my
SINGING IN THE RAIN cd, advance to the Gene
Kelly ‘Singing in the Rain’ track (#20) hit repeat
mode and began singing along as I begin fixing up the
tent. Zipping and strapping. Moving items off the
ground of the tent and Up into the safer regions where
I lay.
I hear screams of terror, excitement and visceral
thrills coming from tents and people hiding all around
me. I turn the volume up, till all I can hear is Gene
Kelly... and a faint flapping of the pteradactyls
attacking my tent.
I begin making shadow animals on the animated sides
of the tent, when suddenly the Four Winds that live
above Crom decided to kick my ass. Until this point,
it was merely exciting... but tolerable.
This is when the gusts started coming from all sides
and.... My god, I was “Taya in da wind” like a naked
Clarice Starling on a camp.
A big poof levels my dome tent, snapping the poles in
a mighty crack. My arms shoot out to begin fighting
the interior of the tent. trying to keep some
semblence of protection. It wasn’t looking good.
Folks... I tell you at this point the Coleman lantern
was knocked off the cooler, Cds were getting wet and
I.... Well... I was all that stood between the roof of the
tent and the floor.
The wind was howling, picking up parts of the tent
and folding it. Waves of water were lifted off the
cement ground and washed over me. I could feel the
pools of water on the other side of the nylon
membrane. I was in a very violent womb.
The bungee cord pull downs were loose and in the
lightning blasts I could see their shadows pounding
about my head with a percussive “th th th thump!!!!”
Folks... It really doesn’t get any more remarkable. I
hear my AICN crew screaming, “HOLY SHIT! THE
TENT IS LEVELED! THEY’RE ALL LEVELED!”
I see shadows of chairs flying, inflated mattresses
floating in the air, and any second I expect my ass to
land on the fucking wicked witch of the east! Any
second Helen Hunt’s dad is gonna be swept up into
the twister. I’m in the shit.
Folks... If you think I camped for a movie, you are
sadly mistakened. I camped for THIS. An
experience, a thrill. The howling of winds, the
pounding of surf, wrestling with the elements. Sure
the chances of having a real life adventure alongside a
movie theater over the course of a scant few days is
not very likely....
But guess what? It happened. An intense visceral
experience that tells you that you’re alive, you’re
breathing, that life is a fucking blast... That adrenaline
is a damn amazing natural high! That, that which
does not kill you can entertain the living shit out of
ya!
The movie has always been secondary to me, it’s
been the line. WHat would happen, how would the
experience work? Would cities be leveled? Would
the world end?
And ya know... For over an hour tonight after the
wind broke that tent, and I clutched ahold of the poles
trying to wrestle them back into place and the Harpies
were tormenting me whilst my light went out and I
was as blind as Phinius and the Argonauts never
came. I was left to my own devices... And I liked it
that way!
It was my adventure. Me vs the BLAIR WITCH. Me
vs the terrible SAND STORM. Me upon the deck of
the Sea Wolf strapped to my wheel howling
obscenities and laughing like Wolf Larson.
Tonight is the life I lead. It doesn’t exist just in a
movie theater, but on the other side of the wall as
well. After this is posted... I’m heading back for
more. Just had to come home and let you hear about
it!
23 hours to go.... heh heh.... What a cool fucking way
to kick off the last 24! No more tents, just us and the
elements. Mano a Nature. And I wouldn’t have it any
other way. We’ve been through hell and high water...
and we’re seeing this movie. It may suck, it may
rock, but it’s the journey we take to see the movie that
really matters... and what an odyssey it has been....
Tonight... God took a piss on us, and my lord it was
magnificient!
Word had it that a storm was coming. A wicked
storm. The type that Snoopy begins his tales with.
But only children are afraid of a flash of lightning and
a rumble of thunder... right?
When the rains began I was showing one fella the
EYES WIDE SHUT ShoWest footage in a cubby
hole chiseled out of the side of the
METROPOLITAN theater. Then... The rains came.
Vinyl-Boy, RoRo, Johnny Wad, Quint, Mr FanBoy,
Father Geek and I are all huddled together. When
Father Geek says, “The flaps are not all zipped up on
the tent... Our shit is gonna get wet!”
All of a sudden, I stare the sky in it’s bubbling toiling
eye and begin unbuttoning my shirt. I’m heading into
the, up to, 80 mph gale force winds with blinding rain
and a chance of golf ball size hail and tornadoes to
‘Zip up the Tent’ and ‘hold down the fort’!
Instantly the wind propells me past the tent, like
Buster Keaton, I lean into the wind at a ridiculous
angle whilst unzipping it. I dive in trying desperately
to see.... You see, at this exact moment, God took out
the lights. The theater, the parking lights....
EVERYTHING was plunged into darkness. Be very
fucking afraid. The dome tent was looking closer and
closer to a snowball stuck on the side of a brick wall,
with me as the wet center.
I struggle to feel around for the lamp. One of those
collapsable ones. I snap it open, twist the switch
and..... LIGHT! Hahahahaa! I scream with joy. I
can see!
The interior of the tent’s sides would range from
convex to concave, from Giger-esque to
O’Keefe-esque... I felt like I was trapped inside the
television set from VIDEODROME. The flapping
sound of gigantic leathery bat wings, thousands of
them filled my ears, driving me insane. I look about
for some candles to light to melt wax onto cloth to
stuff into my ears so I can pilot myself through this
storm like Captain Sinbad.... But there were no
candles.
Instead... I found my portable CD-Player. I get my
SINGING IN THE RAIN cd, advance to the Gene
Kelly ‘Singing in the Rain’ track (#20) hit repeat
mode and began singing along as I begin fixing up the
tent. Zipping and strapping. Moving items off the
ground of the tent and Up into the safer regions where
I lay.
I hear screams of terror, excitement and visceral
thrills coming from tents and people hiding all around
me. I turn the volume up, till all I can hear is Gene
Kelly... and a faint flapping of the pteradactyls
attacking my tent.
I begin making shadow animals on the animated sides
of the tent, when suddenly the Four Winds that live
above Crom decided to kick my ass. Until this point,
it was merely exciting... but tolerable.
This is when the gusts started coming from all sides
and.... My god, I was “Taya in da wind” like a naked
Clarice Starling on a camp.
A big poof levels my dome tent, snapping the poles in
a mighty crack. My arms shoot out to begin fighting
the interior of the tent. trying to keep some
semblence of protection. It wasn’t looking good.
Folks... I tell you at this point the Coleman lantern
was knocked off the cooler, Cds were getting wet and
I.... Well... I was all that stood between the roof of the
tent and the floor.
The wind was howling, picking up parts of the tent
and folding it. Waves of water were lifted off the
cement ground and washed over me. I could feel the
pools of water on the other side of the nylon
membrane. I was in a very violent womb.
The bungee cord pull downs were loose and in the
lightning blasts I could see their shadows pounding
about my head with a percussive “th th th thump!!!!”
Folks... It really doesn’t get any more remarkable. I
hear my AICN crew screaming, “HOLY SHIT! THE
TENT IS LEVELED! THEY’RE ALL LEVELED!”
I see shadows of chairs flying, inflated mattresses
floating in the air, and any second I expect my ass to
land on the fucking wicked witch of the east! Any
second Helen Hunt’s dad is gonna be swept up into
the twister. I’m in the shit.
Folks... If you think I camped for a movie, you are
sadly mistakened. I camped for THIS. An
experience, a thrill. The howling of winds, the
pounding of surf, wrestling with the elements. Sure
the chances of having a real life adventure alongside a
movie theater over the course of a scant few days is
not very likely....
But guess what? It happened. An intense visceral
experience that tells you that you’re alive, you’re
breathing, that life is a fucking blast... That adrenaline
is a damn amazing natural high! That, that which
does not kill you can entertain the living shit out of
ya!
The movie has always been secondary to me, it’s
been the line. WHat would happen, how would the
experience work? Would cities be leveled? Would
the world end?
And ya know... For over an hour tonight after the
wind broke that tent, and I clutched ahold of the poles
trying to wrestle them back into place and the Harpies
were tormenting me whilst my light went out and I
was as blind as Phinius and the Argonauts never
came. I was left to my own devices... And I liked it
that way!
It was my adventure. Me vs the BLAIR WITCH. Me
vs the terrible SAND STORM. Me upon the deck of
the Sea Wolf strapped to my wheel howling
obscenities and laughing like Wolf Larson.
Tonight is the life I lead. It doesn’t exist just in a
movie theater, but on the other side of the wall as
well. After this is posted... I’m heading back for
more. Just had to come home and let you hear about
it!
23 hours to go.... heh heh.... What a cool fucking way
to kick off the last 24! No more tents, just us and the
elements. Mano a Nature. And I wouldn’t have it any
other way. We’ve been through hell and high water...
and we’re seeing this movie. It may suck, it may
rock, but it’s the journey we take to see the movie that
really matters... and what an odyssey it has been....
storm. The type that Snoopy begins his tales with.
But only children are afraid of a flash of lightning and
a rumble of thunder... right?
When the rains began I was showing one fella the
EYES WIDE SHUT ShoWest footage in a cubby
hole chiseled out of the side of the
METROPOLITAN theater. Then... The rains came.
Vinyl-Boy, RoRo, Johnny Wad, Quint, Mr FanBoy,
Father Geek and I are all huddled together. When
Father Geek says, “The flaps are not all zipped up on
the tent... Our shit is gonna get wet!”
All of a sudden, I stare the sky in it’s bubbling toiling
eye and begin unbuttoning my shirt. I’m heading into
the, up to, 80 mph gale force winds with blinding rain
and a chance of golf ball size hail and tornadoes to
‘Zip up the Tent’ and ‘hold down the fort’!
Instantly the wind propells me past the tent, like
Buster Keaton, I lean into the wind at a ridiculous
angle whilst unzipping it. I dive in trying desperately
to see.... You see, at this exact moment, God took out
the lights. The theater, the parking lights....
EVERYTHING was plunged into darkness. Be very
fucking afraid. The dome tent was looking closer and
closer to a snowball stuck on the side of a brick wall,
with me as the wet center.
I struggle to feel around for the lamp. One of those
collapsable ones. I snap it open, twist the switch
and..... LIGHT! Hahahahaa! I scream with joy. I
can see!
The interior of the tent’s sides would range from
convex to concave, from Giger-esque to
O’Keefe-esque... I felt like I was trapped inside the
television set from VIDEODROME. The flapping
sound of gigantic leathery bat wings, thousands of
them filled my ears, driving me insane. I look about
for some candles to light to melt wax onto cloth to
stuff into my ears so I can pilot myself through this
storm like Captain Sinbad.... But there were no
candles.
Instead... I found my portable CD-Player. I get my
SINGING IN THE RAIN cd, advance to the Gene
Kelly ‘Singing in the Rain’ track (#20) hit repeat
mode and began singing along as I begin fixing up the
tent. Zipping and strapping. Moving items off the
ground of the tent and Up into the safer regions where
I lay.
I hear screams of terror, excitement and visceral
thrills coming from tents and people hiding all around
me. I turn the volume up, till all I can hear is Gene
Kelly... and a faint flapping of the pteradactyls
attacking my tent.
I begin making shadow animals on the animated sides
of the tent, when suddenly the Four Winds that live
above Crom decided to kick my ass. Until this point,
it was merely exciting... but tolerable.
This is when the gusts started coming from all sides
and.... My god, I was “Taya in da wind” like a naked
Clarice Starling on a camp.
A big poof levels my dome tent, snapping the poles in
a mighty crack. My arms shoot out to begin fighting
the interior of the tent. trying to keep some
semblence of protection. It wasn’t looking good.
Folks... I tell you at this point the Coleman lantern
was knocked off the cooler, Cds were getting wet and
I.... Well... I was all that stood between the roof of the
tent and the floor.
The wind was howling, picking up parts of the tent
and folding it. Waves of water were lifted off the
cement ground and washed over me. I could feel the
pools of water on the other side of the nylon
membrane. I was in a very violent womb.
The bungee cord pull downs were loose and in the
lightning blasts I could see their shadows pounding
about my head with a percussive “th th th thump!!!!”
Folks... It really doesn’t get any more remarkable. I
hear my AICN crew screaming, “HOLY SHIT! THE
TENT IS LEVELED! THEY’RE ALL LEVELED!”
I see shadows of chairs flying, inflated mattresses
floating in the air, and any second I expect my ass to
land on the fucking wicked witch of the east! Any
second Helen Hunt’s dad is gonna be swept up into
the twister. I’m in the shit.
Folks... If you think I camped for a movie, you are
sadly mistakened. I camped for THIS. An
experience, a thrill. The howling of winds, the
pounding of surf, wrestling with the elements. Sure
the chances of having a real life adventure alongside a
movie theater over the course of a scant few days is
not very likely....
But guess what? It happened. An intense visceral
experience that tells you that you’re alive, you’re
breathing, that life is a fucking blast... That adrenaline
is a damn amazing natural high! That, that which
does not kill you can entertain the living shit out of
ya!
The movie has always been secondary to me, it’s
been the line. WHat would happen, how would the
experience work? Would cities be leveled? Would
the world end?
And ya know... For over an hour tonight after the
wind broke that tent, and I clutched ahold of the poles
trying to wrestle them back into place and the Harpies
were tormenting me whilst my light went out and I
was as blind as Phinius and the Argonauts never
came. I was left to my own devices... And I liked it
that way!
It was my adventure. Me vs the BLAIR WITCH. Me
vs the terrible SAND STORM. Me upon the deck of
the Sea Wolf strapped to my wheel howling
obscenities and laughing like Wolf Larson.
Tonight is the life I lead. It doesn’t exist just in a
movie theater, but on the other side of the wall as
well. After this is posted... I’m heading back for
more. Just had to come home and let you hear about
it!
23 hours to go.... heh heh.... What a cool fucking way
to kick off the last 24! No more tents, just us and the
elements. Mano a Nature. And I wouldn’t have it any
other way. We’ve been through hell and high water...
and we’re seeing this movie. It may suck, it may
rock, but it’s the journey we take to see the movie that
really matters... and what an odyssey it has been....
Father Geek and I are all huddled together. When
Father Geek says, “The flaps are not all zipped up on
the tent... Our shit is gonna get wet!”
All of a sudden, I stare the sky in it’s bubbling toiling
eye and begin unbuttoning my shirt. I’m heading into
the, up to, 80 mph gale force winds with blinding rain
and a chance of golf ball size hail and tornadoes to
‘Zip up the Tent’ and ‘hold down the fort’!
Instantly the wind propells me past the tent, like
Buster Keaton, I lean into the wind at a ridiculous
angle whilst unzipping it. I dive in trying desperately
to see.... You see, at this exact moment, God took out
the lights. The theater, the parking lights....
EVERYTHING was plunged into darkness. Be very
fucking afraid. The dome tent was looking closer and
closer to a snowball stuck on the side of a brick wall,
with me as the wet center.
I struggle to feel around for the lamp. One of those
collapsable ones. I snap it open, twist the switch
and..... LIGHT! Hahahahaa! I scream with joy. I
can see!
The interior of the tent’s sides would range from
convex to concave, from Giger-esque to
O’Keefe-esque... I felt like I was trapped inside the
television set from VIDEODROME. The flapping
sound of gigantic leathery bat wings, thousands of
them filled my ears, driving me insane. I look about
for some candles to light to melt wax onto cloth to
stuff into my ears so I can pilot myself through this
storm like Captain Sinbad.... But there were no
candles.
Instead... I found my portable CD-Player. I get my
SINGING IN THE RAIN cd, advance to the Gene
Kelly ‘Singing in the Rain’ track (#20) hit repeat
mode and began singing along as I begin fixing up the
tent. Zipping and strapping. Moving items off the
ground of the tent and Up into the safer regions where
I lay.
I hear screams of terror, excitement and visceral
thrills coming from tents and people hiding all around
me. I turn the volume up, till all I can hear is Gene
Kelly... and a faint flapping of the pteradactyls
attacking my tent.
I begin making shadow animals on the animated sides
of the tent, when suddenly the Four Winds that live
above Crom decided to kick my ass. Until this point,
it was merely exciting... but tolerable.
This is when the gusts started coming from all sides
and.... My god, I was “Taya in da wind” like a naked
Clarice Starling on a camp.
A big poof levels my dome tent, snapping the poles in
a mighty crack. My arms shoot out to begin fighting
the interior of the tent. trying to keep some
semblence of protection. It wasn’t looking good.
Folks... I tell you at this point the Coleman lantern
was knocked off the cooler, Cds were getting wet and
I.... Well... I was all that stood between the roof of the
tent and the floor.
The wind was howling, picking up parts of the tent
and folding it. Waves of water were lifted off the
cement ground and washed over me. I could feel the
pools of water on the other side of the nylon
membrane. I was in a very violent womb.
The bungee cord pull downs were loose and in the
lightning blasts I could see their shadows pounding
about my head with a percussive “th th th thump!!!!”
Folks... It really doesn’t get any more remarkable. I
hear my AICN crew screaming, “HOLY SHIT! THE
TENT IS LEVELED! THEY’RE ALL LEVELED!”
I see shadows of chairs flying, inflated mattresses
floating in the air, and any second I expect my ass to
land on the fucking wicked witch of the east! Any
second Helen Hunt’s dad is gonna be swept up into
the twister. I’m in the shit.
Folks... If you think I camped for a movie, you are
sadly mistakened. I camped for THIS. An
experience, a thrill. The howling of winds, the
pounding of surf, wrestling with the elements. Sure
the chances of having a real life adventure alongside a
movie theater over the course of a scant few days is
not very likely....
But guess what? It happened. An intense visceral
experience that tells you that you’re alive, you’re
breathing, that life is a fucking blast... That adrenaline
is a damn amazing natural high! That, that which
does not kill you can entertain the living shit out of
ya!
The movie has always been secondary to me, it’s
been the line. WHat would happen, how would the
experience work? Would cities be leveled? Would
the world end?
And ya know... For over an hour tonight after the
wind broke that tent, and I clutched ahold of the poles
trying to wrestle them back into place and the Harpies
were tormenting me whilst my light went out and I
was as blind as Phinius and the Argonauts never
came. I was left to my own devices... And I liked it
that way!
It was my adventure. Me vs the BLAIR WITCH. Me
vs the terrible SAND STORM. Me upon the deck of
the Sea Wolf strapped to my wheel howling
obscenities and laughing like Wolf Larson.
Tonight is the life I lead. It doesn’t exist just in a
movie theater, but on the other side of the wall as
well. After this is posted... I’m heading back for
more. Just had to come home and let you hear about
it!
23 hours to go.... heh heh.... What a cool fucking way
to kick off the last 24! No more tents, just us and the
elements. Mano a Nature. And I wouldn’t have it any
other way. We’ve been through hell and high water...
and we’re seeing this movie. It may suck, it may
rock, but it’s the journey we take to see the movie that
really matters... and what an odyssey it has been....
Buster Keaton, I lean into the wind at a ridiculous
angle whilst unzipping it. I dive in trying desperately
to see.... You see, at this exact moment, God took out
the lights. The theater, the parking lights....
EVERYTHING was plunged into darkness. Be very
fucking afraid. The dome tent was looking closer and
closer to a snowball stuck on the side of a brick wall,
with me as the wet center.
I struggle to feel around for the lamp. One of those
collapsable ones. I snap it open, twist the switch
and..... LIGHT! Hahahahaa! I scream with joy. I
can see!
The interior of the tent’s sides would range from
convex to concave, from Giger-esque to
O’Keefe-esque... I felt like I was trapped inside the
television set from VIDEODROME. The flapping
sound of gigantic leathery bat wings, thousands of
them filled my ears, driving me insane. I look about
for some candles to light to melt wax onto cloth to
stuff into my ears so I can pilot myself through this
storm like Captain Sinbad.... But there were no
candles.
Instead... I found my portable CD-Player. I get my
SINGING IN THE RAIN cd, advance to the Gene
Kelly ‘Singing in the Rain’ track (#20) hit repeat
mode and began singing along as I begin fixing up the
tent. Zipping and strapping. Moving items off the
ground of the tent and Up into the safer regions where
I lay.
I hear screams of terror, excitement and visceral
thrills coming from tents and people hiding all around
me. I turn the volume up, till all I can hear is Gene
Kelly... and a faint flapping of the pteradactyls
attacking my tent.
I begin making shadow animals on the animated sides
of the tent, when suddenly the Four Winds that live
above Crom decided to kick my ass. Until this point,
it was merely exciting... but tolerable.
This is when the gusts started coming from all sides
and.... My god, I was “Taya in da wind” like a naked
Clarice Starling on a camp.
A big poof levels my dome tent, snapping the poles in
a mighty crack. My arms shoot out to begin fighting
the interior of the tent. trying to keep some
semblence of protection. It wasn’t looking good.
Folks... I tell you at this point the Coleman lantern
was knocked off the cooler, Cds were getting wet and
I.... Well... I was all that stood between the roof of the
tent and the floor.
The wind was howling, picking up parts of the tent
and folding it. Waves of water were lifted off the
cement ground and washed over me. I could feel the
pools of water on the other side of the nylon
membrane. I was in a very violent womb.
The bungee cord pull downs were loose and in the
lightning blasts I could see their shadows pounding
about my head with a percussive “th th th thump!!!!”
Folks... It really doesn’t get any more remarkable. I
hear my AICN crew screaming, “HOLY SHIT! THE
TENT IS LEVELED! THEY’RE ALL LEVELED!”
I see shadows of chairs flying, inflated mattresses
floating in the air, and any second I expect my ass to
land on the fucking wicked witch of the east! Any
second Helen Hunt’s dad is gonna be swept up into
the twister. I’m in the shit.
Folks... If you think I camped for a movie, you are
sadly mistakened. I camped for THIS. An
experience, a thrill. The howling of winds, the
pounding of surf, wrestling with the elements. Sure
the chances of having a real life adventure alongside a
movie theater over the course of a scant few days is
not very likely....
But guess what? It happened. An intense visceral
experience that tells you that you’re alive, you’re
breathing, that life is a fucking blast... That adrenaline
is a damn amazing natural high! That, that which
does not kill you can entertain the living shit out of
ya!
The movie has always been secondary to me, it’s
been the line. WHat would happen, how would the
experience work? Would cities be leveled? Would
the world end?
And ya know... For over an hour tonight after the
wind broke that tent, and I clutched ahold of the poles
trying to wrestle them back into place and the Harpies
were tormenting me whilst my light went out and I
was as blind as Phinius and the Argonauts never
came. I was left to my own devices... And I liked it
that way!
It was my adventure. Me vs the BLAIR WITCH. Me
vs the terrible SAND STORM. Me upon the deck of
the Sea Wolf strapped to my wheel howling
obscenities and laughing like Wolf Larson.
Tonight is the life I lead. It doesn’t exist just in a
movie theater, but on the other side of the wall as
well. After this is posted... I’m heading back for
more. Just had to come home and let you hear about
it!
23 hours to go.... heh heh.... What a cool fucking way
to kick off the last 24! No more tents, just us and the
elements. Mano a Nature. And I wouldn’t have it any
other way. We’ve been through hell and high water...
and we’re seeing this movie. It may suck, it may
rock, but it’s the journey we take to see the movie that
really matters... and what an odyssey it has been....
convex to concave, from Giger-esque to
O’Keefe-esque... I felt like I was trapped inside the
television set from VIDEODROME. The flapping
sound of gigantic leathery bat wings, thousands of
them filled my ears, driving me insane. I look about
for some candles to light to melt wax onto cloth to
stuff into my ears so I can pilot myself through this
storm like Captain Sinbad.... But there were no
candles.
Instead... I found my portable CD-Player. I get my
SINGING IN THE RAIN cd, advance to the Gene
Kelly ‘Singing in the Rain’ track (#20) hit repeat
mode and began singing along as I begin fixing up the
tent. Zipping and strapping. Moving items off the
ground of the tent and Up into the safer regions where
I lay.
I hear screams of terror, excitement and visceral
thrills coming from tents and people hiding all around
me. I turn the volume up, till all I can hear is Gene
Kelly... and a faint flapping of the pteradactyls
attacking my tent.
I begin making shadow animals on the animated sides
of the tent, when suddenly the Four Winds that live
above Crom decided to kick my ass. Until this point,
it was merely exciting... but tolerable.
This is when the gusts started coming from all sides
and.... My god, I was “Taya in da wind” like a naked
Clarice Starling on a camp.
A big poof levels my dome tent, snapping the poles in
a mighty crack. My arms shoot out to begin fighting
the interior of the tent. trying to keep some
semblence of protection. It wasn’t looking good.
Folks... I tell you at this point the Coleman lantern
was knocked off the cooler, Cds were getting wet and
I.... Well... I was all that stood between the roof of the
tent and the floor.
The wind was howling, picking up parts of the tent
and folding it. Waves of water were lifted off the
cement ground and washed over me. I could feel the
pools of water on the other side of the nylon
membrane. I was in a very violent womb.
The bungee cord pull downs were loose and in the
lightning blasts I could see their shadows pounding
about my head with a percussive “th th th thump!!!!”
Folks... It really doesn’t get any more remarkable. I
hear my AICN crew screaming, “HOLY SHIT! THE
TENT IS LEVELED! THEY’RE ALL LEVELED!”
I see shadows of chairs flying, inflated mattresses
floating in the air, and any second I expect my ass to
land on the fucking wicked witch of the east! Any
second Helen Hunt’s dad is gonna be swept up into
the twister. I’m in the shit.
Folks... If you think I camped for a movie, you are
sadly mistakened. I camped for THIS. An
experience, a thrill. The howling of winds, the
pounding of surf, wrestling with the elements. Sure
the chances of having a real life adventure alongside a
movie theater over the course of a scant few days is
not very likely....
But guess what? It happened. An intense visceral
experience that tells you that you’re alive, you’re
breathing, that life is a fucking blast... That adrenaline
is a damn amazing natural high! That, that which
does not kill you can entertain the living shit out of
ya!
The movie has always been secondary to me, it’s
been the line. WHat would happen, how would the
experience work? Would cities be leveled? Would
the world end?
And ya know... For over an hour tonight after the
wind broke that tent, and I clutched ahold of the poles
trying to wrestle them back into place and the Harpies
were tormenting me whilst my light went out and I
was as blind as Phinius and the Argonauts never
came. I was left to my own devices... And I liked it
that way!
It was my adventure. Me vs the BLAIR WITCH. Me
vs the terrible SAND STORM. Me upon the deck of
the Sea Wolf strapped to my wheel howling
obscenities and laughing like Wolf Larson.
Tonight is the life I lead. It doesn’t exist just in a
movie theater, but on the other side of the wall as
well. After this is posted... I’m heading back for
more. Just had to come home and let you hear about
it!
23 hours to go.... heh heh.... What a cool fucking way
to kick off the last 24! No more tents, just us and the
elements. Mano a Nature. And I wouldn’t have it any
other way. We’ve been through hell and high water...
and we’re seeing this movie. It may suck, it may
rock, but it’s the journey we take to see the movie that
really matters... and what an odyssey it has been....
thrills coming from tents and people hiding all around
me. I turn the volume up, till all I can hear is Gene
Kelly... and a faint flapping of the pteradactyls
attacking my tent.
I begin making shadow animals on the animated sides
of the tent, when suddenly the Four Winds that live
above Crom decided to kick my ass. Until this point,
it was merely exciting... but tolerable.
This is when the gusts started coming from all sides
and.... My god, I was “Taya in da wind” like a naked
Clarice Starling on a camp.
A big poof levels my dome tent, snapping the poles in
a mighty crack. My arms shoot out to begin fighting
the interior of the tent. trying to keep some
semblence of protection. It wasn’t looking good.
Folks... I tell you at this point the Coleman lantern
was knocked off the cooler, Cds were getting wet and
I.... Well... I was all that stood between the roof of the
tent and the floor.
The wind was howling, picking up parts of the tent
and folding it. Waves of water were lifted off the
cement ground and washed over me. I could feel the
pools of water on the other side of the nylon
membrane. I was in a very violent womb.
The bungee cord pull downs were loose and in the
lightning blasts I could see their shadows pounding
about my head with a percussive “th th th thump!!!!”
Folks... It really doesn’t get any more remarkable. I
hear my AICN crew screaming, “HOLY SHIT! THE
TENT IS LEVELED! THEY’RE ALL LEVELED!”
I see shadows of chairs flying, inflated mattresses
floating in the air, and any second I expect my ass to
land on the fucking wicked witch of the east! Any
second Helen Hunt’s dad is gonna be swept up into
the twister. I’m in the shit.
Folks... If you think I camped for a movie, you are
sadly mistakened. I camped for THIS. An
experience, a thrill. The howling of winds, the
pounding of surf, wrestling with the elements. Sure
the chances of having a real life adventure alongside a
movie theater over the course of a scant few days is
not very likely....
But guess what? It happened. An intense visceral
experience that tells you that you’re alive, you’re
breathing, that life is a fucking blast... That adrenaline
is a damn amazing natural high! That, that which
does not kill you can entertain the living shit out of
ya!
The movie has always been secondary to me, it’s
been the line. WHat would happen, how would the
experience work? Would cities be leveled? Would
the world end?
And ya know... For over an hour tonight after the
wind broke that tent, and I clutched ahold of the poles
trying to wrestle them back into place and the Harpies
were tormenting me whilst my light went out and I
was as blind as Phinius and the Argonauts never
came. I was left to my own devices... And I liked it
that way!
It was my adventure. Me vs the BLAIR WITCH. Me
vs the terrible SAND STORM. Me upon the deck of
the Sea Wolf strapped to my wheel howling
obscenities and laughing like Wolf Larson.
Tonight is the life I lead. It doesn’t exist just in a
movie theater, but on the other side of the wall as
well. After this is posted... I’m heading back for
more. Just had to come home and let you hear about
it!
23 hours to go.... heh heh.... What a cool fucking way
to kick off the last 24! No more tents, just us and the
elements. Mano a Nature. And I wouldn’t have it any
other way. We’ve been through hell and high water...
and we’re seeing this movie. It may suck, it may
rock, but it’s the journey we take to see the movie that
really matters... and what an odyssey it has been....
and.... My god, I was “Taya in da wind” like a naked
Clarice Starling on a camp.
A big poof levels my dome tent, snapping the poles in
a mighty crack. My arms shoot out to begin fighting
the interior of the tent. trying to keep some
semblence of protection. It wasn’t looking good.
Folks... I tell you at this point the Coleman lantern
was knocked off the cooler, Cds were getting wet and
I.... Well... I was all that stood between the roof of the
tent and the floor.
The wind was howling, picking up parts of the tent
and folding it. Waves of water were lifted off the
cement ground and washed over me. I could feel the
pools of water on the other side of the nylon
membrane. I was in a very violent womb.
The bungee cord pull downs were loose and in the
lightning blasts I could see their shadows pounding
about my head with a percussive “th th th thump!!!!”
Folks... It really doesn’t get any more remarkable. I
hear my AICN crew screaming, “HOLY SHIT! THE
TENT IS LEVELED! THEY’RE ALL LEVELED!”
I see shadows of chairs flying, inflated mattresses
floating in the air, and any second I expect my ass to
land on the fucking wicked witch of the east! Any
second Helen Hunt’s dad is gonna be swept up into
the twister. I’m in the shit.
Folks... If you think I camped for a movie, you are
sadly mistakened. I camped for THIS. An
experience, a thrill. The howling of winds, the
pounding of surf, wrestling with the elements. Sure
the chances of having a real life adventure alongside a
movie theater over the course of a scant few days is
not very likely....
But guess what? It happened. An intense visceral
experience that tells you that you’re alive, you’re
breathing, that life is a fucking blast... That adrenaline
is a damn amazing natural high! That, that which
does not kill you can entertain the living shit out of
ya!
The movie has always been secondary to me, it’s
been the line. WHat would happen, how would the
experience work? Would cities be leveled? Would
the world end?
And ya know... For over an hour tonight after the
wind broke that tent, and I clutched ahold of the poles
trying to wrestle them back into place and the Harpies
were tormenting me whilst my light went out and I
was as blind as Phinius and the Argonauts never
came. I was left to my own devices... And I liked it
that way!
It was my adventure. Me vs the BLAIR WITCH. Me
vs the terrible SAND STORM. Me upon the deck of
the Sea Wolf strapped to my wheel howling
obscenities and laughing like Wolf Larson.
Tonight is the life I lead. It doesn’t exist just in a
movie theater, but on the other side of the wall as
well. After this is posted... I’m heading back for
more. Just had to come home and let you hear about
it!
23 hours to go.... heh heh.... What a cool fucking way
to kick off the last 24! No more tents, just us and the
elements. Mano a Nature. And I wouldn’t have it any
other way. We’ve been through hell and high water...
and we’re seeing this movie. It may suck, it may
rock, but it’s the journey we take to see the movie that
really matters... and what an odyssey it has been....
and folding it. Waves of water were lifted off the
cement ground and washed over me. I could feel the
pools of water on the other side of the nylon
membrane. I was in a very violent womb.
The bungee cord pull downs were loose and in the
lightning blasts I could see their shadows pounding
about my head with a percussive “th th th thump!!!!”
Folks... It really doesn’t get any more remarkable. I
hear my AICN crew screaming, “HOLY SHIT! THE
TENT IS LEVELED! THEY’RE ALL LEVELED!”
I see shadows of chairs flying, inflated mattresses
floating in the air, and any second I expect my ass to
land on the fucking wicked witch of the east! Any
second Helen Hunt’s dad is gonna be swept up into
the twister. I’m in the shit.
Folks... If you think I camped for a movie, you are
sadly mistakened. I camped for THIS. An
experience, a thrill. The howling of winds, the
pounding of surf, wrestling with the elements. Sure
the chances of having a real life adventure alongside a
movie theater over the course of a scant few days is
not very likely....
But guess what? It happened. An intense visceral
experience that tells you that you’re alive, you’re
breathing, that life is a fucking blast... That adrenaline
is a damn amazing natural high! That, that which
does not kill you can entertain the living shit out of
ya!
The movie has always been secondary to me, it’s
been the line. WHat would happen, how would the
experience work? Would cities be leveled? Would
the world end?
And ya know... For over an hour tonight after the
wind broke that tent, and I clutched ahold of the poles
trying to wrestle them back into place and the Harpies
were tormenting me whilst my light went out and I
was as blind as Phinius and the Argonauts never
came. I was left to my own devices... And I liked it
that way!
It was my adventure. Me vs the BLAIR WITCH. Me
vs the terrible SAND STORM. Me upon the deck of
the Sea Wolf strapped to my wheel howling
obscenities and laughing like Wolf Larson.
Tonight is the life I lead. It doesn’t exist just in a
movie theater, but on the other side of the wall as
well. After this is posted... I’m heading back for
more. Just had to come home and let you hear about
it!
23 hours to go.... heh heh.... What a cool fucking way
to kick off the last 24! No more tents, just us and the
elements. Mano a Nature. And I wouldn’t have it any
other way. We’ve been through hell and high water...
and we’re seeing this movie. It may suck, it may
rock, but it’s the journey we take to see the movie that
really matters... and what an odyssey it has been....
hear my AICN crew screaming, “HOLY SHIT! THE
TENT IS LEVELED! THEY’RE ALL LEVELED!”
I see shadows of chairs flying, inflated mattresses
floating in the air, and any second I expect my ass to
land on the fucking wicked witch of the east! Any
second Helen Hunt’s dad is gonna be swept up into
the twister. I’m in the shit.
Folks... If you think I camped for a movie, you are
sadly mistakened. I camped for THIS. An
experience, a thrill. The howling of winds, the
pounding of surf, wrestling with the elements. Sure
the chances of having a real life adventure alongside a
movie theater over the course of a scant few days is
not very likely....
But guess what? It happened. An intense visceral
experience that tells you that you’re alive, you’re
breathing, that life is a fucking blast... That adrenaline
is a damn amazing natural high! That, that which
does not kill you can entertain the living shit out of
ya!
The movie has always been secondary to me, it’s
been the line. WHat would happen, how would the
experience work? Would cities be leveled? Would
the world end?
And ya know... For over an hour tonight after the
wind broke that tent, and I clutched ahold of the poles
trying to wrestle them back into place and the Harpies
were tormenting me whilst my light went out and I
was as blind as Phinius and the Argonauts never
came. I was left to my own devices... And I liked it
that way!
It was my adventure. Me vs the BLAIR WITCH. Me
vs the terrible SAND STORM. Me upon the deck of
the Sea Wolf strapped to my wheel howling
obscenities and laughing like Wolf Larson.
Tonight is the life I lead. It doesn’t exist just in a
movie theater, but on the other side of the wall as
well. After this is posted... I’m heading back for
more. Just had to come home and let you hear about
it!
23 hours to go.... heh heh.... What a cool fucking way
to kick off the last 24! No more tents, just us and the
elements. Mano a Nature. And I wouldn’t have it any
other way. We’ve been through hell and high water...
and we’re seeing this movie. It may suck, it may
rock, but it’s the journey we take to see the movie that
really matters... and what an odyssey it has been....
sadly mistakened. I camped for THIS. An
experience, a thrill. The howling of winds, the
pounding of surf, wrestling with the elements. Sure
the chances of having a real life adventure alongside a
movie theater over the course of a scant few days is
not very likely....
But guess what? It happened. An intense visceral
experience that tells you that you’re alive, you’re
breathing, that life is a fucking blast... That adrenaline
is a damn amazing natural high! That, that which
does not kill you can entertain the living shit out of
ya!
The movie has always been secondary to me, it’s
been the line. WHat would happen, how would the
experience work? Would cities be leveled? Would
the world end?
And ya know... For over an hour tonight after the
wind broke that tent, and I clutched ahold of the poles
trying to wrestle them back into place and the Harpies
were tormenting me whilst my light went out and I
was as blind as Phinius and the Argonauts never
came. I was left to my own devices... And I liked it
that way!
It was my adventure. Me vs the BLAIR WITCH. Me
vs the terrible SAND STORM. Me upon the deck of
the Sea Wolf strapped to my wheel howling
obscenities and laughing like Wolf Larson.
Tonight is the life I lead. It doesn’t exist just in a
movie theater, but on the other side of the wall as
well. After this is posted... I’m heading back for
more. Just had to come home and let you hear about
it!
23 hours to go.... heh heh.... What a cool fucking way
to kick off the last 24! No more tents, just us and the
elements. Mano a Nature. And I wouldn’t have it any
other way. We’ve been through hell and high water...
and we’re seeing this movie. It may suck, it may
rock, but it’s the journey we take to see the movie that
really matters... and what an odyssey it has been....
been the line. WHat would happen, how would the
experience work? Would cities be leveled? Would
the world end?
And ya know... For over an hour tonight after the
wind broke that tent, and I clutched ahold of the poles
trying to wrestle them back into place and the Harpies
were tormenting me whilst my light went out and I
was as blind as Phinius and the Argonauts never
came. I was left to my own devices... And I liked it
that way!
It was my adventure. Me vs the BLAIR WITCH. Me
vs the terrible SAND STORM. Me upon the deck of
the Sea Wolf strapped to my wheel howling
obscenities and laughing like Wolf Larson.
Tonight is the life I lead. It doesn’t exist just in a
movie theater, but on the other side of the wall as
well. After this is posted... I’m heading back for
more. Just had to come home and let you hear about
it!
23 hours to go.... heh heh.... What a cool fucking way
to kick off the last 24! No more tents, just us and the
elements. Mano a Nature. And I wouldn’t have it any
other way. We’ve been through hell and high water...
and we’re seeing this movie. It may suck, it may
rock, but it’s the journey we take to see the movie that
really matters... and what an odyssey it has been....
vs the terrible SAND STORM. Me upon the deck of
the Sea Wolf strapped to my wheel howling
obscenities and laughing like Wolf Larson.
Tonight is the life I lead. It doesn’t exist just in a
movie theater, but on the other side of the wall as
well. After this is posted... I’m heading back for
more. Just had to come home and let you hear about
it!
23 hours to go.... heh heh.... What a cool fucking way
to kick off the last 24! No more tents, just us and the
elements. Mano a Nature. And I wouldn’t have it any
other way. We’ve been through hell and high water...
and we’re seeing this movie. It may suck, it may
rock, but it’s the journey we take to see the movie that
really matters... and what an odyssey it has been....
to kick off the last 24! No more tents, just us and the
elements. Mano a Nature. And I wouldn’t have it any
other way. We’ve been through hell and high water...
and we’re seeing this movie. It may suck, it may
rock, but it’s the journey we take to see the movie that
really matters... and what an odyssey it has been....
-
+ Expand All
-
Then, as harry began to pick up the remnents of his tent, he noticed a gleaming eye in the darkness, and heard the clicking of the raptors claw hitting the pavement.
Tonight only, The Line VS the Raptors: The Ultimate Adventure
-
.....Holy shit.
-
I've been curious for a while. How the fuck do you people support your selves out there?
-
Are you a psychopath?.
-
Your Guess is as good as mine
-
Tickets went on sale Wednesday, 5/12 at 3 p.m. I went Thursday, didn't have to wait in line AT ALL, and I got tickets for a 3 am showing on the 19th. RESERVED tickets in a huge theater with all of the technical bells and whistles. I won't have to wait at all, and I will have seen the film a mere two to three hours later than those who have waited in line for weeks. I know there is a carnival/communal aspect to waiting in line, but geeze, I can get up Wednesday morning and tell everybody I have already seen it, too, without having to have waited a single second. I like Star Wars A LOT, too, but I'm not killing myself to see it. In three years, when we're gearing up for Episode 2, I hope all theaters institute ticket lotteries (like the one at the theater where I will see it. BTW I was nowhere near close to 'winning' the lottery) and reserved seating so the news media do not have any pathological fans to exploit and hold up to ridicule.
The multiplex in my town will be able to seat 54,600 moviegoers to see Ep 1 between May 19th 12:01 am and May 23rd. That's about 20% of the community's total population.
Personally, I hate waiting in line, and I'm glad I didn't. I'd have felt like a fool knowing I wasted precious hours (or days) of my life to see a movie a couple of hours early.
To anybody who waited in line for a long time, God bless you, and enjoy the movie tonight. You earned something. I hope the movie is worth it. -
How do you arrange your posts? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And change colour of the text. Harry- Could you change the colour of your text again?. It was like visiting a whole new website....
-
You know if harry only updates once per day that means we have another 20 yours to wreak havoc on talkback without getting our posts removed.
-
Man, you're just having almost as much fun as those people at the drive-in in Twister. Hope you have another storm or maybe the earth will rip apart underneath the remains of your tents and all of you will fall right in!! I seriously wish I was there to experience this. Man, what are the odds...
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Lucas telling the New York Post fans should "get a life" was only the BEGINNING. Wait until you get a load of the crap he told "The Juicy Cerebellum" in what is his most honest, revealing (first time he's talked, in detail, about the next "Indiana Jones" movie) confrontational, interview yet. Find it at www.juicycerebellum.com/george.htm
Also check out "The Juicy Cerebellum's" recent updates for a unique spin on the "Star Wars" insanity at www.juicycerebellum.com
"Where EVERYONE is normal, because NOBODY is sane!" -
I live in the UK and will be travelling to New York next week to see episode 1, can anyone recomend a shit hot theatre to see it in 'cause i'm gonna book in advance to make sure I get a ticket, UK to NY is a long way to go remember!!!
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Chief? Did you actually read Harry's post? The whole point of it was to explain why he was queueing! For him it's not just a movie, it's an event. It's the same difference that there is between watching a football game on TV and actually going to see it. Sure, technically you get a better view of the game from your TV, but how can it compare to the thrill of actually being there. Harry's there for the fun of it - and if you can't see how it'd be fun then I guess that's just where people like you and him differ (I don't mean that nastily, just saying that this is the kind of thing that differentiates folks).
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Maybe these lines are the Woodstock of our generation. Hope the movie is worth the wait as well, but even if it isn't, you line-waiters have gone through an oddysey that would make Homer jealous. I'll probably go see TPM once the crowds have died down because I don't have the time to wait in any lines, even for a few hours. But at this moment I almost regret having a life. Cheers to you Harry for bringing out the movie geek in all of us with reports like that.
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I really couldn't care about the people waiting in lines, and I am not really a fan of Star Wars (I mean, I'll see it, but...), but this wind and rain story was fucking hilarious and the writing was amazing. Very referential. It was descriptive and really got ya thinking of how it was. By far the best SWE1 article or story I have read, anywhere!
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i hate having to see this film in the UK, not being a part of it over there in the good ol' US of A......the lines here won't be anything like the experience of seeing it over there, dammit,dammit, dammit all to hell and back!!!!!
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We're going to have to just block all transmissions from the States until Episode I arrives here- NO SPOLIERS- remember the rest of the planet please!!
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so god has finally told all his believers that, in essence, they are idiots. must hit you right.........here. all the faith. all the defending of he and his ideas. all the worthless krapp merchandise you invested your hard-earned money in. all the time you spent waiting in line....stinking, starving, wet, bloated, bored. remember all the insults (get a life) you incurred from those you assumed were people who didn't "get it." you bit back and justified your insanity by standing by lucas through thick and thin. surely those people just didn't understand, they weren't in on the whole religion. the critics were "outsiders" and would never understand. and now it turns out that lucas is actually one of the "outsiders." it could just as well have been him, in living color, sneering at you to get a life. the man you sacrificed for, worshipped, followed, deified. the man whose pockets you lined, and whose pockets your children will also line. he thinks you're a moron. "it's just a movie." ouch. "get a life." that's a stab through the heart. will you continue to worship? if his movie is shite, will you continue to defend it? do you feel used? what about liam neeson, he was even more direct. with one fell swoop, he gave up the idea of ever even coming into contact with the lot of you. let the geek-speak defense begin.
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A jedi craves not these things!
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It depends on what kind of theater experience you're looking for. The Zeigfeld (54th St. and 6th Ave.) is an enormous theater, seating over 1,000 and has a huge screen. You would be totally immersed in the experience. But you might also want to consider the United Artists Union Square 14 theater (13th St. and Broadway). It's brand-new (a few months old) with awesome sound and all stadium seating (so you don't have to worry about some monster sitting in front of you). Every seat is good. The Zeigfeld is showing it around the clock every 3 hours. The Union Square theater is showing it around the clock every hour on the hour. Most shows for this week are already sold out, but I'm not sure about next week. You might want to try calling ahead at (212) 777-FILM.
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Harry, the line you wrote..."from Giger-esque to O
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Jeezus, Harry, sounds like an experience and if there's anything I dig, it's experience. Wish I was there.
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anyone got a light?
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Harry, you wrote about a Thunderstorm? Reminds me of Philip Seymour Hoffman in Twister...only that was a bigass tornado.
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i've listened carefully to all the points being made over the last few days and i'd just like to say one word ans thats wobble. i mean mean banana. i mean - oh never mind. turnip.
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I work at a group of radio stations that, like everyone else, has been pontificating on the phenomenon. One morning jock was ranting about folks waiting in line to see an overrated hunk of computer-generated crap. I went in and read your piece on the air -- pointing out that if he's not fascinated enough to appreciate what you're doing, then fine, but don't ruin the magical spell for others. He was just trying to create unsubstantiated attention by playing the weak argument. People like you and your AICN crew remind us that David Ansen and his ilk are oftentimes a necessary evil.
You and your friends and family stand for everything that's right and idealistic and, well, heroic about the biggest movie experience since your and my childhood.
I can only hope my 8 year old nephew is as mystified and spellbound as I was in 1977.
And, in spite of anything, will be again tonight at 12:01 AM.
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Not. I got my ticket in advance sales last week, and will see it Wednesday night at 8. Hmmm, I weigh that with
sitting in a line for days, obviously not making money at a job, all so I can see a 2 hr movie
at midnight? Man, the letdown that's going to happen, not because of the movie, but AFTER the movie, when everyone
realizes that there's no more line to wait in, and everyone has to go back to their darkened bedrooms, and load up the Talkbacks
with 5000 word Epics about the movie. I'm thinking the B.O. vapors are going to cause visual as well
as visceral distress for those trying to see the screen.
As for Harry's story, it was enjoyable, but then again, that guy's life/job involves doing this shit. -
We got that storm blazing through Houston late last night. I wanted to tie some tracking devices to Pepsi cans and send them off into the sky. Through rain, sleet, and snow, we will see Episode I. Harry, when you put on "Singing in the Rain" did it make you thirsty for a bit of the old Ultraviolence?
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for what was clearly the work o'th' DEVIL!?
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Oh Goddess, I wish I was there! This sounds better than Woodstock. Hey Harry, you got any room in your tent for an extra pile of CDs (and owner)? :-)
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You know, it seems to me that all these line people aren't following fair 'line rules'. Why do you get to stake out a place in line and then GET TO LEAVE, go home, shower, post to your web site, etc? I think some of the people at Lincoln Gaskings Countingdown.com line are actually GOING TO WORK and then coming back to the 'line'! Every time one of you leaves, you should have to pack up and go back to the end upon your return! This reminds me of Arthur Dent in Hitchhiker's Guide, convincing the bulldozer operator to lie down in the mud front of his own bulldozer so that Arthur & Ford can retire down to the pub...
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I have a hard time believing that some wind could move the man-mountain that is Harry. I mean, didn't they have to shoot his appearance with Ebert in widescreen to fit them both?
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http://www.fortunecity.com/tinpan/tigerlilies/125/philez.htm
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This would be hilarious if it wasn't so sad. No, I'm not a Starwoids basher. I got my own opening day ticket. What's sad is that here we sit in the most technologically advance civilization our species has ever produced, reading Harry's exploits via a huge, complex computer network, and Harry is running off at the mouth attributing rain, thunder, lightning and wind to a deity. Wanna know the difference between The Force as depicted in Star Wars and a religion? The Force is demonstrable. Religions all depend on fear of the unknown. Such muck was understandable when gods were our best guesses. Now we know better.
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Sounds like high adventure Harry! Less than 24 hours left here until episode one. I can make it. I can make it... (repeat)
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At least you've only got a few hour. Us Brits have got about another month. Just wonder how many have flown out and then sat in the pissin' rain for a day. Now that is dedication
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Little Rock must be in an alternate universe or something, because yesterday (May 17) I strolled right up to the box office (no line!) and bought a ticket to the 12:15 AM (tonight!) showing of TPM. THERE WERE STILL SEATS LEFT!!!
The funny thing was, I meant go see The Mummy... But I guess I was broadsided by the Dork Side of the Farce, and remembered the 12-hour funfest around the 150 on El Camino Real in Santa Clara 16 years ago... Sure, I am old enough to ought to know better- but Ha! I'll have seen it FIRST in my neighborhood! -
I have stayed away from this site for the last two weeks because I did not want some idiot to spoil the movie for me. I will not read any reviews until after I have seen the movie myself. I just got my tickets yesterday for saturday at 1:15! So saturday My wife, 4-year-old son, and I are going to go to the theatre, walk right in, and the only line we will have to stand in is to get popcorn. Then we will go in and sit in great seats. This is great! Damn I am glad that we will not have to fight a couple hundred other people waiting in line to get tickets. I do not have time for that, because I have so many things to do on the weekend that pertain to everyday life. Movies are low priority, and that is why I am glad I do not have to wait in line. Now I am leaving this site again until after I have seen the movie. Then I have a lot of reading to catch up on, but I will probably skip everything I have missed except the reviews. Peace.
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For those that registered to post in the talkback sections, could you add a kill file? JMS Power!'s routine was humorous at first, then it became boring, now it is tiring, and tomorrow it will be pointless. I'd just like to add him/her to a killfile and let the talkback automatically filter it's messages out - then I don't even have to waste energy scrolling over the message.
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It took me five minutes this morning to pick up tickets to the midnight showing of Star Wars. Why would any of you want to wait in line when it took me five minutes? Especially for a so-so movie, EVEN IF IT IS STAR WARS (gasp, shudder). Visit your local library or volunteer some time at your local nursing home. Do ANYTHING, just get a life and be productive you geeks.
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May 18, 1999 10:23:31 AM CDT
Spoiler free TPM review from someone who's *actually* seen it
by hal9000
WOULD YOU GUYS GIVE THIS FILM A FUCKING BREAK!! No one has seen it, yet for some bold reason, they feel inclined to tear it apart like it was the May counterpart of The Avengers. If you see the film with the preconceived notion that it will suck horrendously, chances are you'll be pissed. I saw it at 9:00 am yesterday, and I liked it so much that I came back for an impromptu midnight showing (just in case you're curious, I manage a movie theater, and we managed to snag our prints early). Quite simply, the movie is a FUCKING BLAST!!! I had a permanent smile etched on my face the entire time, if a comet crashed through the theater and killed me instantly I would've died a happy man. The film is a visual extravaganza, with great performances (especially Neeson, the rest of the cast fares nicely, with the exception of Lloyd, who is bogged down by too much cutesy poo crap) and a strong narrative. Let me clear all of this up now: Jar Jar Binks is not the antichrist. He does not ruin the movie, in fact, I thought his character provided some much welcome comic relief ("How wude!"). Maybe I'm just a mindless sap, but Jar Jar cracked me up. I look foward to seeing him again in the upcoming installments. Jake Lloyd on the other hand, didn't impress me that much. The kid is a decent actor, but Lucas took the character in the wrong direction. The sight of a pre Darth Vader shouting "yipee!" incessantly almost made me wince. Darth Maul is a total badass, and the climactic lightsaber duel is high octane cinematic euphoria. People are going to bitch more about Mr. Mauls relatively short screen time, but I think his character works better as an elusive, atyptical villain. In conclusion, I ask that all TPM naysayers and such call off their vicious attacks on this film because chances are they too will find a few redeemable qualities, even if they're enraged beyond comprehension about Jar Jar, Anakin, or the boring taxation subplot. It was a magical experience, and one that I may well be telling to my grandkids when I'm old and decrepid. For two hours and fifteen minutes, I was a kid again! As corny as that may sound, it was absolutely genuine. This may rival Eyes Wide Shut as the most memorable film experience of 99. I've always thought that Episode I had no chance of beating Titanic, but now I feel inclined to say that it very well could. Rock on Harry! Savor the magic when you see it tonight! I look foward to reading your review in the impending hours, and I'll be there to back the film up when all the naysayers arrive to tear it to shreds. May the force be with all of you...
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"Our shit is gonna get wet!" Father Geek yelled over the whine of the rising storm. Harry looked past Fathers head to the now violently flapping plastic tents. He stood slowly, seperating himself from his geek clan, he knew what he had to do.
Harry began to unbutton his shirt.
"No!", cried Mr. Fanboy, "Don't Do it!"
Harry replied in a whisper, "I must my friend. Our belongings are sacred to us and must be preserved. I know I may not return, I know that the storm may swallow me like a giant whale but fear not my dear brethren I shall live on in legend."
"I meant don't take off your shirt!" shouted Mr.Fanboy, "Your flying belly is dangerous! You could take out an eye! If you have to, then strip over there!" He pointed to the theatre wall, "Spare me a sight that will haunt my dreams. Ok?"
The group of huddled geeks groaned as Harry ignored the wishes of Mr. Fanboy and stripped.
Knees buckling Rara fainted, landing in the lap of Vinyl-boy. Vinyl-boy scarecly noticed the prone Rara staring up at him with dead eyes. He could not pull his eyes from the incredible spectacle before him, "...My god...so...much...cellulite..." muttered Vinyl-boy.
Leaning into the wind Harry pushed towards the endangered encampment. His friends remained behind eyes wide and mouths agape, "It's like, like some sort of moving mountain of Jello." observed Johnny Wad. The others agreed with barely audible grunts.
"Ow! My eye!" Quint reeled back as Harry passed, with one palm pressed against the left side of his face he fell to the pavement in pain.
"Sorry." yelled Harry over his shoulder.
Vinyl-Boy watched as Harry dissapeared into the distance beyond the veil of rain and sleet. It was then that he looked down at Rara. Vinyl-boy breathed in deeply, sadly.
Rara was dead. But in some ways Vinyl-boy envied him: the dead lived not with the memory of a naked Harry Knowles.
Vinyl-boy looked into the storm once more but the monstrosity was gone. How many will it take? How many must suffer before he's finally stopped. No... not he, thought Vinyl-boy...it. In that second, a second of glass like clarity Vinyl-boy understood two things deep in his heart. Firstly that Harry wasn't human. How could he be? And second Vinyl-boy and Harry Knowles would meet again.
When we do, thought Vinyl-boy, i'll be ready.
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Obvious title for the 'romantic' Episode II: Titanakin.
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Yu147647 or whatever. You are one funny motherfucker. I have never (till now) fallen out of my seat laughing while reading a talkback.
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I can't believe myself. I thought I'd learned from going to Gatsby's The Lost World page (way back in 97) every single day and getting constant updates to the day the movie opened. I ruined the Lost World for myself. And now. I've ruined Star Wars. First off ((SPOILER FILLED)), I know that Darth Maul gets killed. I'm suspicious as to what happens to Neeson. I'm pretty positive HE gets killed. But from all the little tidbits I've found from this site, Cinescape, and Dark Horizons, mixed with the trailers and the music video, I can honestly say I know how the movie will go. Exactly. I already know it. I should just review it now. I will. Good effects, Lloyd sucks, no story, too much CGI, fun, Jar Jar sucks, the two headed announcer at the pod race sucks. I give it 2.5 stars out of 5.
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May 18, 1999 11:00:15 AM CDT
The one thing more pathetic than line people is the crowd critic
by oberon
It's amazing - I don't know how much more clearly Harry could have spelled out that the EXPERIENCE of being in the line is as (if not more) important as seeing the movie itself. Perhaps if you haven't done it, you wouldn't understand. Think of it as an urban camping trip, with a nice dash of fantasy shop thrown in. The movie's just the final chapter, a nice cap. It's ideally done with a group and a good deal of equipment. But if you still don't get it - or can't get the time off work or finals - do everyone the favor of LAYING OFF the line people. This is what makes them happy, no one is getting hurt - so let it go. Find something important to bitch about, like Kosovo or the declining quality of microbrews. SIDEBAR: Some have noted the ease of getting tickets in certain areas - in certain markets, especially smaller ones in "flyover country," that may be the case. In Kansas City, I got midnight tickets after an 8 hour line wait (and a whole lot of fun); the first day sold out in a few hours. On the coasts and major cities, naturally, it's much worse. I think being able to obtain opening day tickets without any wait is going to be very atypical, however. But Gosdpeed to you if you were one of the lucky ones. And for some, waiting in line IS lucky, which is the whole point Harry and I are trying to make.
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That WAS some funny shit, man.
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Give the line people a break! They happen to feel very strongly about their taste in movies, and they want to get the real theatrical experience of Episode I. By enduring the countless hours of waiting in the line, the line people form an insatiable and underlying bond that will unite them in harmony when the magical moment arrives when they witness Lucas' opus with their own eyes. Speaking of eyes, I'm gonna get in line for Eyes Wide Shut on June 16th! Just kidding, but I can only imagine what seeing Episode I will be like after waiting in line for a month. It's a fucking great film man, and it's restored my faith in the cinema. All the angry naysayers can suck on dese nuts for succumbing to the temptations of the dark side. Fear not, TPM delivers gloriously. Read my spoiler free review down below (and watch out for that horrendous spoiler that some jagoff included in his post, it should sandwhiched inbewteen this post and my review post).
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According to some good sources, Chris Morris creative force behind satirical award winning UK comedy The Day Today and Brass Eye, will appear as fanatical rebel leader calling himself Blake. Paul Darrow also returns as psychopath Avon who is now a federation agent.
Ron Thornton who pioneered the CGI effects for Babylon 5 has been approached by executive producer Brian Lighthill to provide the complex effects. Thortnon actually worked on the original BBC classic in 1981 providing the Scorpio model for season 4.
In the light of the lame Phantom Menance, this is very good news indeed! -
The best way to ruin the movie is to read the DH reviews that provide plenty of spoilers yet no insiteful points about how good the movie is. I loved the review that went something like, the movie is terrible, Jar Jar sucked, Anakin sucked, Natalie Portman sucked. I'll give the special effects some props, but otherwise the film was terrible. I'll give it a D minus. Thank God for the useful (and relatively spoiler free) AICN reviews!
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Oh my God!! I thought Harry's post was funny, until I read Yu's.. Harry's reminded me of a "BAD" Gilligans Island epsidode.. YU's was like a movie in my head.. Oscar nominated I might add..:)
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I think the only thing worse than waiting in line would have to be to hear about it. I really like this site (though I feel it is very slanted, PC, hypocritical, etc), but the one thing I don't get is what some people seem to love. The stories about what happens before the movie. I couldn't give a shit if it rains, or snows, or someone gets hit by lightning (actually that would be pretty cool) before the movie. Waiting in line, especially if you can get tickets easily without it, is an exercise in stupidity and shows that you have nothing better to do with your time. That is really sad. I got back from Europe a couple of days ago and my friends had not gotten me tickets. All I did was go to the theater and pick some up. No waiting in line. I will wait for seats tonight, but only for an hour at most. It must be nice to not have a real job where you have to work, but instead can sit in a fricking line for a day or for multiple days. And this is not really waiting in line. Harry talked about leaving the line to go take a shower. That is not waiting in line, that is more like loitering. I love Star Wars and am looking forward to seeing it in less than nine hours, but I have a scary feeling that it will suck. If it does it won't be the end of the world, and at least I won't have waited in line forever to see it. Talk shows do a ton of jokes about it, but it does point towards being a loser.
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I heard that he showed up at a line and invited ten fans to see the movie with him at Lucasfilm, then the Lucasfilm people gave the fans a standing ovation.
He just had to make some amends after that "get a life." comment.
:)
P.S. Although i would never stand in line for so long, lets put it in perspective. Sure, they should "get a life," but it isnt like they are harming anyone. Compare it to hunters or those indian(or cowardly) whale hunters who can only be happy by killing--and cry for joy when they finally do-these people definitely need to get a life--as well as serious psychiatric help.
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THRU-OUT THE DAY HARRY WAS DARING THE BIG GUY "TO BRING IT ON". I THINK HARRY CAN REALLY APPRECIATE NOW THE IMPLICATIONS OF HIS BLASPHEMY. NOAH HAD HIS BOAT AND HARRY HAD HIS TENT AND THEY BOTH HAD A RIDE THEY WILL NEVER FORGET. I THE GUARDIAN OF THE VERY DRY NEW COMPUTER KNOW NOW THE FULL DANGER OF REVOLVING IN HARRY'S WORLD.
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I hope it's obvious to all you children who have been living in Lucasland these last three months that Star Wars 1 peacked last thursdayevening at about 6:30pm when Ricky Martin eclipsed TPM (as you all call it) on Broadway and took all the attention away from this low flying balloon you call a movie. TPM has shot it's wad and and is lying dry and crusty as a pair of jockey short on the bedside floor of a naughty 14 year old. This, by the way is what many in my generation (Over 50) think of your generation, that you're a bunch of premature ejaculators who can't resist your nostalga fixes and who react to the suggestion of "get a life" as if it were really something you had a say about when actually for most of you it is too late to get a life and you have no choice but to stand in your existential hell of a Star Wars ticket line and watch the functioning part of the world pass you by, whatever value you had as objects of curiosity gone as of last blessed Thursday. Gotta go, life calls.
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I don't have a gripe against people who want to "experience" a movie by entering some form of altered consciousness induced by exposure to the elements, lack of food, and self-hypnosis - heck, who here *hasn't* seen SOME flick when they're either exhausted, drunk, or stoned? I'm sure their "experience" will be one of semi-religous intensity. BUT - can you trust any review written by a person who sees a movie both through an endorphin haze AND through a true-believer fanboy filter? Your call.
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Yes, that site sucks so totally beyond the broadest scope of human suck-perception. Ick!!
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Hey Tristan - you're named after the Brad Pitt character in LEGENDS OF THE FALL, right? Great movie on account of Anthony Hopkins who steals every scene he is in, right up to the stroke victim/blind in one eye scene, which left me rolling on the floor in laughter.
Anyway, regarding your comments about my generation (I'm 24). I'd have to agree there are a great many slackers from my age group who seem intent on blaming their useless, pathetic life on poor parenting or some such nonsense. You've got to get over the past and make a success out of yourself. I just graduated from grad school and if I can do it, what the hell is holding you back? Step out of that fucking line and carpe diem, you mentally deficient pukes.
By the way, any premature ejaculaters out there? You can solve your problems in three weeks. All it involves is exercising ONE muscle that most of you use several times a day. That's all I've got to say, if you want to know more, look it up yourself, speedy. -
Just a funny story. I live in Indianapolis. All these people camped out Tuesday night last week and waited in line to get tix. Well, Sunday rolled around, and I happened to be seeing another movie, and asked the ticket boy what was up with Star Wars tickets. He said they had plenty of seats for all shows including the 1st show at midnight. I promptly bought 2, one for my fiance. See, I couldn't wait in line because I work at a good job where people don't appreciate apathy. Harry, you can wait in line because it IS your JOB. But, I can't wait to see this movie tonight next to some shmuck who camped on the pavement. While he was sitting on the pavement, I went to work, got off work and had beers with my other working buddies, and went home to a beautiful girl. I will watch the movie. If I don't like it, it was just a movie. If a line person doesn't like it, it's the greatest disappointment there could possibly be. I'm 25 and it's not just the over 50s looking at these people in bewilderment. Wouldn't it be just as fun to get a bunch of Star Wars fans together and NOT sit in line? They're as bad as a 12 year old girl who can't stop watching TITanic.
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Alright folks, we have checked all the website's (especially here) for almost two years just drooling in anticipation of this film- and tonite at 1201 am (technically wednesday morning) boom baby- the movie I have been waiting for since I was seven years old. Now Harry I haven't exactly gone what you have been through, here in West Texas there haven't exactly been long lines. But the one thing I do want to say here folks is enjoy the film!!! I have prepared myself for a visual extravaganza as only George Lucas can do. I am not going to this film with my typical filmmaker attitude, not expecting this film to change my life or come to some divine revelation about the world we live in. I am going to this film and watching it for something that I haven't done since I started making films: to be entertained. So many of these film critics have just torn the hell out of the Phantom Menace- Oh Jake Lloyd's acting is flat, Natalie Portman's got a crazy accent, Jar Jar is stupid: you know what, all of the original had their problems too, but we still love and cherish them, I mean come on, Mark Hammill's whiny voice, "I'll never join you!!!" I mean come on the guy didn't give an academy award winning performance but we still love the guy. My advice to everyone: kick back, relax, and go back to a world we haven't been to in over sixteen years. I can already feel the tears coming with the fox fanfare blaring in my ears, god I feel like a kid again..........
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Since we all hate Jar Jar, and we all know he's not in Episode IV: A New Hope, we know that in either episode II or III he will be cut out of the script. Since I know that George Lucas is a fareley smart man, he will get the idea that NOBODY LIKES JAR JAR and he will probably have him killed or something. If I was writing the script I would Have Anakin turn his back on Jar Jar and slice him in ahlf with a light Sabre....But thats me.
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SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS
I just read the screenplay, and was so disappointed that I may not even bother to see the film. The plot is weak and plodding, the characters are lifeless, JarJar Binks is unintelligible even when what he says is written on a page, and all its humor is juvenile (without even a nod to the adult audience).
The movie could probably only be salvaged if you could get into the first show, where the audience gets worked up enough that you could actually feel some excitement. I bet people who go to the later shows are going to be surrounded by a lot of unhappy people at the end (unless the audience is only children).
It's sad to say, because I was really excited about seeing the film, and even willing to go in with an open mind. But the screenplay is so incredibly bad that I'd rather sit at home and make up my own backstory, and hope that the second episode is worth the money. -
I read your "100 things wrong with the movie", and all I can say is that I had exactly the same problems (with plot points, etc. that I saw in the screenplay). I can't comment on the acting obviously, but you were right on regarding about 95% of your issues with the story.
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...OR WHY I GET EMBARRASSED WHEN I ADMIT I THOROUGHLY ENJOY SCIENCE FICTION
Does the depiction of the comic book store owner in The Simpson's ring a bell? How about the abusive/derisive humor of Letterman and Leno the last few weeks? What about the NY POST's fabricated quote where Lucas Shatneresqely tells the cash cows to acquire something other than his merchandise? What about the backlash of the so-called film critic community, which like the Pharisees, created the hype around a enigmatic person, then horrified at the perceived monstrosity they in fact created, crucify that figure? What about the incessant bickering and odd behavior of fans which feed all the forementioned flames? How dare Neeson say he wont ever grace the presences of the rabid and disenfranchised souls who mark the courses of their lives with fan gatherings? How dare Lucas! How dare Shatner! How dare Neeson! How dare Berman! WE BUY THEIR STUFF!
That is the problem. We are the Johns to their Pimps. It's not just SF/Fantasy. BTW...they are the same, there is no SCIENCE FICTION...it is a contradiction in terms, an oxymoron...science is about truth and facts, not fiction. Look at sports and its rabid following. Look at how the money has twisted the values of its participants. Rose, Strawberry, Tyson, Simpson. Yet, we as fans blindly tow the respective party lines where our fan allegiences lie.
Many are calling The Phantom Menace the cultural event of the nineties, namely the media whores, their fan johns and the corporate pimps. I cringe when I hear that.
The single most defining moment in humanity was in 1969. More than a million persons in a thousand industries built machines which allowed us to walk on the moon. Would you line up for weeks on end to see a movie about that? Would you pay hundreds of dollars to attend a convention dedicated to those men? Would you pay for their autographs?
In 1976 I remember being so bored in my fifth grade class, that I figured out how old I would be in 1999. This year I turn 34. I definately wont be celebrating my birthday on Luna like I thought. I blame myself, not for getting older, but for reading too much into the television programs and the films I watched. I blame myself for not having the imagination to see a realistic outlet for my passions. We all should. Star Wars and Star Trek are fun...BUT. A very big one.
I have to admire those persons who pursued medicine because of De Kelley, engineering because of Doohan, physics because of Nimoy, or military service because of Shatner. Those who emulated their objects of admiration got it right. The end all, be all isn't about a fixation on a genre and has nothing to do with ownership of a product or products with no practical value. It isn't about righteous indignation over the remarks of the creaters of the distraction or the reporters of the distraction. It is about what you do with the precious resource of your time. We should have the same indignation over our abuse of our time as we do have with those for whom we work.
20 billion dollars. That is, according to Forbes, one of the elite media escort services. That is from you and me, for the next three movies and piles of plastic Jar Jars. Imagine what we could do if we TUNED OUT, like our sellout parents did in the Seventies. What if we spent our money on high tech retraining. Hit the weight machines at the gym. Read wonderful pieces of literature. Participated in the political process and demanded the best from our elected representatives. What if we stopped buying junk we dont need and started building things, things like automatons that do our present, petty, insipid jobs for us? Build machines that will take us to Mars? Build machines that will bring life to Mars? Devote science to prolonging life, so that we might someday see our great great grandchildren walk on planets with a differently colored sun?
Nah, that would interfere with us watching the series finale of DS9, watching TPM 25 times, writing letters to Paramount demanding they send Voyager home and writing letters begging Lucas to do episodes 7,8,9.
So what am I going to do? Hell, I think I will use the marvel of this age which is sitting on my desk to download some porn...
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I dont know which is funnier- Harry believing he had god on his side due to a thunderstorm (which happens constantly around this time of year..esp in texas. Or the fact that i'm not going to wait in line and i'll still see the movie tommorrow. Ohh well, when you're mad you're mad. Back to the shelter.
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I think that this is the only movie that we are going to see Jar Jar in. If you have read the book then you know that this is a story in and of itself. He serves his purpose in this storyline and nothing else...kinda like Greedo..but much more screen time. I haven't seen the movie yet so I can't complain about him..but I have read the story and I think this is the only time we are going to see him. He probably goes back to the swamp after this movie.
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Lay off, you assholes. If some of these folks want to wait in line for a month, that's fine with me. Can't say I would want to do so (I have school and like responsibilities and stuff), but let the dorks have their fun. Last night I went and saw Tron at the El Capitan (beautiful restored print--the movie is totally stupid, but amusing), then Matrix at the Mann Chinese (that makes 7 times for me--what can I say, I love Agent Smith). Then my friends and I went and hung out by the Episode 1 line near the Chinese theatre. What I saw was a bunch of people just camping out and having a good time, and it gave me a good feeling to see my fellow fans enjoying themselves. To each his or her own, I say, so fuck off, you ultra-critical types.
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Definitely not something I'll be forgetting any time soon. My friends and I joined the crowed at the Maul of America just after 6am on the 12th (they wouldn't let us camp out overnight, or I would have been there earlier.) The line was already 80-90 people long by that time. For the next 9 hours, until we finally got to the ticket window at 3pm, one hour after tickets officially went on sale, we played the longest game of UNO in history, talked with fans, visited other parts of the line, got a bit of media coverage, wondered when the hell all that coffee would kick in, and felt our excitement build. We were stared at by tourists, laughed at by people with "lives" (which I don't understand, what are people with lives doing at a movie theater, not to mention a tourist attraction, at 10am on a Wednesday?) A 20-something guy came by and asked me what the hell we were all doing in line. "Star Wars tickets!" I said excitedly. He gave me THE LOOK - the same look that so many people get on their faces when they see fellow "waiters" like ourselves, the same look that people, even on this forum, get when they call us "lifeless geeks." And you know what? I didn't care. Because, god dammit, this is STAR WARS!! And the love I have for these movies far outweighs any opinion coming from closed-minded pricks who don't understand us. All of you, you know who you are - what is it about us that makes us maladjusted? The fact that this is a movie, and not some sporting event? The fact that we're DOING WHAT WE LOVE?
So, you ask, who am I? Am I one of those 20-somethings who's never had sex, still lives with their parents, has no job, and spends their days at comic shops? Hardly.
I am a college student, like most of the fellow "waiters" at the MOA. I sacrificed sleep, classes, and sanity to wait for these tickets. I grew up with the trilogy, having been born just after ESB, and I'm as eager as anyone to see Episode One.
And yes, waiting in line was worth it. Of the 3 midnight showings at the MOA, two sold out before we got to the ticket window. So, unlike all of you "people with lives" who just "walked up and got tickets", here, it was either wait in line or wait a week to see TPM.
Precisely 7 hours from now, I will be seated in a theater, gazing up at the previews, wishing they'd hurry up and be over. An odd calm will come over me - this is the moment, the moment that so many have anticipated for so long. Tonight, all over the continent, theater-goers, film buffs, and fellow SW geeks will feel a chill of happiness, as Lucas' vision unfolds before us.
Screw the critics.
Screw the naysayers.
THIS IS STAR WARS.
Heather -
I'm back. Shudder. Let me get this straight, here is the argument you have presented us:
1) Star Wars, by virtue of just being Star Wars, is more important to the line waiters than doing something of major importance, like attending the class you skipped.
2) Waiting in line to spend money on a movie takes precedent over actually getting your money's worth (i.e. the skipped class)
3) Therefore, "Because it's Star Wars", wasting time, YOUR MOST PRECIOUS COMMODITY, is a virtue.
Do you see the error in this reasoning? This line-waiters are going to be the ones who bitch about this movie the most, mark me. -
Everyone congratulate Knowles on his induction into the Premiere 100 Most Powerful People in Hollywood list. He's number 92, I think, but he's definitely the most influential guy on there who still can't afford a spell checker. What I've never been able to understand is how Our Man in Austin gets his arcane insider information. After all, he's not what you'd call inconspicuous. Perhaps he makes a career out of being underestimated, like Marge the policewoman from Fargo. That being said, I'm not sure how much actual POWER he wields. No project lives or dies based on the Knowles aegis. But he is a godsend for smaller movies. If it weren't for him, Six String Samurai would have made far less than the $217 it finally recouped. And surely the Blair Witch Project is enjoying a pre-release boost from his enthusastic stream-of-consciousness suppurations. He's a lousy writer and a worse critic, but he's got HEART, damn it! I say god bless him. I wonder if he still gets emotional when he watches Armageddon. -
Faulty AIR CONDITIONING!?!?!?
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I see your point, but could you be any MORE jingoistic? Sputnik, was as big an accomplishment. Yuri Gegerin, is a heck of a hero. The Wright Brothers. The development of penicilin. The lazer. All these are "defining" moments of "humanity". "Humanity" does NOT range from California to Washigton state and from Florida to New England. You may want to keep that in mind before you speak for "humanity". PS Do yourselves all a favor, see the movie next week. The last thing you need is to sit next to a 300 pound geek whose spent the last few days sweating it out, through blazing heat and rain, in a hot furry, wookie outfit...
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I've really enjoyed reading about the line dwellars. I totally understand the fun of the misery-in-line experience. I did my undergrad at Duke, home of the dickhead fans camping out two weeks or more in winter for Duke games. I spent most of January-March of my freshman year in the tents of Krzyzewskiville. I saw a few great games, but I could have seen those on TV, or even walked into the stadium right before game time and weaseled my way into the student section. But alot of the fun was the misery in those tents...cold as shit, lots of dominos pizza, lots and lots of tequila, a game of strip poker with two less-than-attractive co-eds, etc. The line isn't for me for Episode 1, but I understand the allure. Harry, I'm with you in spirit on this one...I hope you enjoyed the movie, but you'll remember the line forever.
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Hey Harry and Co.
What's up with all the bad words??
Why don't you bleep that stuff out!
I enjoy your site very much,
but some of us don't want to hear that kind of language.
Also, there may be young kids going to your site, what about them.??
Thanks for your attention. -
When you said the storm was crazy that wasnt enough. That was the worst storm ive seen in a long time. the truth is i went to get tickets at metropolitan and saw you. then the storm hit last night and i thought what the hell are the people doing in the lines. I thought that they would let you inside but i guess not. Oh well that sucks. Im seeing it on opening day @ 5:00. You prob seeing it in less than an hour as i type this. Oh well.
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Has anyone read the blurb about Alec Guinness in the latest "People"? Sir Alec apparently said "I shrivel inside" every time "Star Wars" is mentioned. As for the mania itself, I think his phrase was, "a fantasy world of secondhand, childish banalities."
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At 7pm, Tuesday the 18th, my sister went to the biggest theater multiplex in town, the AMC 20. She walked up to the window and bought 3 tickets for the *7:10PM* showing of SWE1 for ***MAY 19th***. I don't have to skip work, i didn't have to wait in line or pay extra for advance tickets, or even fend for my life in a fucking rainstorm. To that i say... BWAHAHAHAHAAHAHA.. loosers.
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I am so impressed by this movie.. It is perfectly comparable to the first one.. The pod race was amazing. The lightsabre duels were so freakin kool, way better then any from the original three. The story was really well put together, you just have to keep your eye on Palpatine. His hidden agenda is a perfect setup for the next 2. Jake Lloyds performance was great, considering he was supposed to be playing a kid and not a dark lord of the sith..
Jar Jar didn't bug me at all, he basically performs the same function as C3P0 did in the first movie.. A bit of comic relief now and then.. Liam Neesons performance was everything a Jedi master should have been.. Ewan McGregor was very good.. Natalie Portmans performance was great. The supporting cast great. I can't say enough good things about this movie. Of course you can find faults with it if you try hard enough,like some of the CGI secquences, or if you simply did not like some of the pieces of the movie, such as Jar Jar.. But my suggestion is to take the movie for what it is, an introduction into the story of Anakin Skywalker and a very fun piece of escapism along the way... And if you can, see the movie at least once with a kid and marvel at how Lucas is gonna hook all the kiddies into the next 2 episodes. =)
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Don't get me wrong, I am a Star Wars fan, but if Liam Neeson says he'll never go to a convention, all the better. How humiliating it must be to struggle in Hollywood, hone your craft, get critical and popular recognition, and then see a plastic effigy of yourself with a spinning lollipop coming out of your head!! I'm sure it was a fun job for him, but I don't want to see him end up in the gutter with Shatner.
!Viva Michael Collins!
Sean -
ID LIKE TO GIVE A BIG F-U TO ALL THE NAYSAYERS.
EP 1 HAD ITS FLAWS, BUT YOU WILL REMEMBER HOW IRRITATING LUKE WAS IN EP 4.
BRAVO TO A FLAWLESS TECHNOLOGICAL ACHEIVEMENT FROM THE SKYWALKER RANCH AND ILM CREW. THE BAR IS RAISED FAR BEYOND ANY EXPECTATIONS AND WILL NOT BE EQUALED FOR QUITE SOME TIME.
THE PROMISE FOR THE SEQUELS TO EP 1 OUTWEIGH ANY ILL EFFECTS OF THIS MOVIE.
HOPE IS ALIVE AGAIN.
THE FORCE IS BACK.
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First off, to all the non-believers & people who trashed this movie...ARE YOU ON FUCKING CRACK?!?! This movie was everything I thought it would be and then some. No, it is not a perfect movie ( dialogue was shotty, Portman was wooden, and that fucking Jar Jar was pretty awful too )but these are minor compared to the overall excitment this movie generated. I have to hand it to Lucas. It is an amazing piece of work. Ok, I'm still at a loss for words. I'll repost when Harry posts his review. Later! -
i just returned from seeing episode one.i have no intentions of seeing episode II or III.
ya know, i had lowered my expectations so much after reading the reviews that i didn't feel there was any way this film could dissapoint.
it wasn't jar jar,it wasn't the cameo relegated to c-3p0,or the cameo relegated to darth maul,it was how surprised i was at how boring this movie is.
the humor is cringe inducing at times and loyd's performance was so bad that it completely throws you out of the movie(i blame this more on lucas' screenplay than i do loyd simply because i want ot cut the kid some slack)and,makes the action scenes so trivial that you just stop caring.
i guess i'm mostly dissapointed at the end battle,this has got to be the most horrible and useless space battle in any sci-fi action movie i have ever seen.i couldn't beleive when the droid controller ship suddenly explodes and i realised that this was all there was to it.
most people who didn't sit through the midnight showing tonight are going to think that im just here to bash something that i didn't care about.I DID CARE!i cared about this because this was my childhood.its where i feel i was blessed with my own imagination.instilled with my own dreams.i love star wars.
but now i just don't seem to care anymore.
lucas had 16 years to think about this film.and even if he doesn't want to admit it he owes his success to us.and in return he owed us something special.
i just don't know how to feel.
i'm angry,dissapointed,and just plain flabbergasted at what i watched tonight.it's like lucas has completely forgatten how to build a scene and instill the audience with excitement.
DAMMIT I'M PISSED!
i listened to the episode 1 soundtrack and found most of the music truly touching and fitting of the star wars universe,its just to bad that most of that music is chopped up and buried in the background to the point that the soundtrack in the film seems boring and unispired.theres none of the great cues that used to herald in the beginning of the action in the original.it comes off as just piss poor scoring of a movie.
i had my jar jar binks action figure with me and had hopes that he was not gioing to be as bad as i expected.and truthfully he wasn't so horrible that it sent shivers up my spine but i waish i could of understood at least one whole sentence the guy said.
the two headed pod race announcer should be excised from all future copys of the filmm and never mentioned again.
and speaking of podracing,this was the one thing that every reviewer no matter wether it was a good review or not seemed to agree that it was simply amazing.and i will admit its great to look at and great to listen to but the build up to it was so bland and the final pay off was so much shit that no matter how great looking it was i found myself bored with it.
i loved the tusken raiders though.
gGODDAMIT I'M STILL PISSED OFF AND DON,T KNOW WHAT TO DO ABOUT IT!!
DAMN YOU GEORGE LUCAS GIVE ME BACK ALL THE TIME I'VE WAITED AND DREAMED ABOUT THIS MOMENT!
PLEASE SOMEONE HELP ME! -
After seeing the movie at 12:01 this morning, I would like to say only this: despite worries to the contrary and petty annoyances during the film, The Phantom Menace...
... kicks ass.
It was all worth it, baby. Yeah! -
May 19, 1999 4:00:02 PM CDT
PLOT MATTERS? (Or how George Lucas brainwashed people into think
by dolfanar
A dissapointed geek, unable to comprehend the mixed feelings he has about TPM confronts George Lucas. He tries to express why can't like it as much as ANH or Empire... ************************
GEEK: I can't. It's too bad.
LUCAS: Quality matters not. Judge me by my plot, do you? Mm? Mmmm.
(The geek shakes his head)
LUCAS: And well you should not. For my ally is the Hype. And a powerful ally it is. Entertainment Tonight creates it, makes it grow. Greedy beings are we... (Lucas slaps the geek in the back of the head)... not this crude matter. You must feel the Hype around you. (gesturing) Here, between you... me... the fanboy... the Kentucky Fried Chicken commercial... everywhere! Yes, even between Leonard Maltin, and Roger Ebert!"
GEEK: (discouraged) You want the impossible.
(Quietly Lucas towards the hoards of fanboys still waiting to see TPM. With his eyes closed and head bowed he points at them. Soon the masses of soiled geeks rise above their filth and move forward, as innocent pedestrians yell out in terror, and scoot away. The entire line moves obediently toward the ticket booth. Lucas, perched on a pedestal, guides the crowd carefully toward the dank theater. The Geek stares in astonishment as the crowd settles abruptly into their seats. He walks toward Lucas.
GEEK: I don't... I don't believe it.
LUCAS: That is why I *cannot* fail. -
I just got back from a midnight Star Wars and I'm giddy. The movie was stunning, incredible, and most importantly, worthy of the Star Wars saga. After reading reviews and listening to naysayers, I was ecstatic to find myself becoming genuinely bummed when I realized there were only 15 minutes left in the movie. I simply wanted more of what I was seeing. Every character was excellent, every scene memorable. I couldn't have asked for a more compelling movie. It is easily my favorite movie of the year, and I place it on par with Empire.
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Sarcasm or not, comments on editing out profanity are ridiculous. Profanity is one of the finest features of the English, or American English language. Where 'fuck' is the 'smurf' of words. Revel in its power. And you don't think kids hear/read/say/write such language. Get with it. More profanity for all!
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i just got home from the 12:01 showing and i will be perfectly honest with you: i TOTALLY dug this movie. maybe not being an absolute freak (as opposed to just a freak) about star wars served me well, maybe my mind is far too childlike and thus enjoying this movie was a given..i don't know...i really don't understand why some people are complaining about this and that "oh they didnt explain this good..blah blah blah" hello? thats why they have 3 prequels..not just one..
the only fault i can find with the movie is not enough ewan mcgregor..(i am admittedly an absolute ewan mcgregor freak)but i am guessing that will change in ep II and III..
there were two young children sitting in front me..before the movie started the little boy who was no more than 8 years old was struggling to stay awake..but as soon as the movie started he was so completely enthralled with the movie and so excited that he could barely stay in his seat..his sister was equally stoked about the movie.. and i remember that is exactly how my brothers and i were when we were that age watching the trilogy..
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I saw it. You know what I saw.
So, did it meet my incredibly high expectations?
Yes, and then some.
I just had without a doubt the greatest movie going experience of my life. Me and 2 friends arrived at the theater about 3 hours early and joined the hundreds of other SW fans in line. There was a girl dressed up as Queen Amidala, she spent some bucks on the costume, it was really good. She looked alot like Natalie Portman too, her dress lit up and everything... There was also an Obi Wan and Qui Gon Jinn. The theater was sold out for all 5 screens, we had perfect seats, almost right in the middle. We waited for an hour after they seated us, talking about various things, such as how we can't believe what was happening, so unreal that we are about to see a new Star Wars film... There was a radio station there interviewing people and some news crew shooting footage. The atmosphere was electric. When the lights went down the crowd cheered loudly, and I did too. When several new trailers finished, only 8 minutes as promised, and the Feature Presentations animations ended, and the theater totally darkened, I sat there in a stupor... We cheered loudly when the 20th Century Fox fanfare played, and the Lucasfilm logo. We cheered the loudest when the words A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away appeared, leading into the opening crawl... STAR WARS: Episode 1
The Phantom Menace... What followed was too incredible for words.
I did indeed recapture the feeling of being a kid again and watching the original films, wide eyed in amazement and wonder... visiting an incredible galaxy full of sights and sounds and characters from the farthest reaches of imagination... It was perfect. The best word to describe my experience tonight would be joy. Pure joy. I will never forget it.
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I don't have too much to add here except that the DTS went out in my theater. Got 4 free passes out of it. My inconsequential rating:
2 Stars for the 1st 3/4 of the movie. Felt to me like everyone was overacting and overly dramatic and the computer generated characters just didn't mesh well enough to give them such a large role (although they were very very well done as far as what we have seen in the past)
.5 Stars for the advanced special effects. Pushing the envelope gets some credit even if it didn't really mesh that well.
.25 Stars for the last 1/4 of the movie. I liked the foreshadowing to the later episodes and the lightsabre sequences. Almost lost these points because of the cliche' space battle sequence, though (hope that wasn't too much of a spoiler).
So Total: 2.75 Stars.
Again, I know my opinion is inconsiquential but why not.
Jimmy Hoffa -
May 19, 1999 4:35:02 PM CDT
Loved every minute of it. ...Oh, ...Darth Maul looks like a badl
by nikifor
FIRST OFF! I think that this starwars movie was beautifully filmed and put together. CG kills anything ever made.
HEY! what the fuck were three Steven Spielbergs ET characters doing in the lower left senate chamber. eh?
...Darth Meul's face should have never been painted, and if this was done only to outline a very very bad guy for all those kids who watched and will watch the movie, then thank god he only appeared in a couple of scenes.
DOWN WITH BADLY AND UNNCESSARLY PAINTED MAUL!!!!!!!!!!!!! -
Just got back from the show.
I am unable to sleep, but thank the Gods its not from disappointment.. I am giddy.
But I see why the naysayers are panning this film, I can see why they feel betrayed. They are victims of themselves. They have truly grown up.
I was 5 when Star Wars first graced the screen, and as most of us in that age group were, I was captured forever. I matured, and the movies never lost their spark, because I still watched them with the reverence of a 5 year old coming as close to a religious experience as is possible.
This return to youth is involuntary, I believe most fans are still fans because of it. Ask anyone who saw Star Wars for the first time at 27 years old or 35, and most will tell you it wasnt that great, it was cheesy, it was corny , it was a KIDS movie. If you watch Star Wars with old eyes, you will understand the reaction that people are having to Episode I. This movie is for the same audience Star Wars was intended for 22 years ago, the children. Young eyes are the key. Be 5 again. Let go your mature self. Remember when you believed in The Force and didnt just think it was part of a movie. Find that toys-R-us kid inside you that promised never to grow up, watch with young eyes and you will love this movie as I did.
ok my rant is done... flame at will.
Wez
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I just want say one thing tonight as i crawl back into my hole at 3:49 in the morning, and that is Hoorah. Thank you, thank you all who came out at 2 in the morning to camp, thank you to all who cheered and applauded as the fanfare played, and finally, thank you Sir Lucas for givin me, as well as others around the world, a chance to see this true marvel of filmdom, you made me 9yrs old, again. Hats off to you all. I loved every glorious ILM induced minute of it.
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I live in Austin. I was not in line when the storm hit, I was tucked safely in my bed, which shook with the thunder and wind. Great write up on what it was like to be in a tent.
LOVE the movie. The pod designers should get a raise. Ewan was incredible in the last light sabre battle. Not a perfect movie, well worth the effort to see it at a midnight showing at the Metropolitan. There was a Lucasfilm rep at the theatre to "make sure everything was kosher" in the way the theatre was running the screenings. Not sure if we were singled out b/c of Harry's coverage or if Lucasfilm spot checked theatres accross the country. Anyone? -
you don't need young eyes to view this film you need about ten hits of acid.thats the only thing i can think of that would of made this movie enjoyable.
ya know i feel im pretty much a kid at heart and always will be.i love cartoons,i love toys,i love all those things that are bad for me.
but this peice of shit just layed there like a fucking raccoon carcass.
i never felt excited through the whole movie except for at the beginning when the fox logo appeared followed by those ten famous words printed in blue.then of course i was enraptured by the opening crawl even though i had read it a dozen times before.
this movie had no energy what so ever,and yes i'll admit that looking at those landscapes and the beautiful designs,the creatures,the ships,the familiar places that i had not visited in so long had a certain effect on me,butDAMMIT I NEED TO FEEL INVOLVED in what i'm looking at.i need to feel a sense of a danger,which was lacking throughout this movie.
dammit why...why...why..why....why...WHY...WHY...WHY HELP ME DEAR LORD JESUS HELP ME. -
Just got home from the 1201 screening in Calgary. The whole film was kick ass, 'cept for that stupid Jar Jar character. I understand that Lucas had to put something in for the wee kiddies to enjoy and what not. But goddamn it, it was we adults who saw the originals who were demanding entertainment. All I ask is that the next opening crawl reads Episode II.....Jar Jar died.....
Be kool. -
I'm gonna reserve all my comments until Harry posts his review, but needless to say, I fucking HATED this flick!!! The movie was an INSULT to Star Wars fans the world over, and I feel fucking EMBARRASSED at what I just saw!!
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May 19, 1999 5:28:54 PM CDT
DERA LORD JESUS THE BOY HAS MIDICHLORIANS IN HIS CELLS
by xavier masterson
so did yoda and obi-wan just forget to tell luke that he has microscopic midichlorians swimming around his cells or did i fall asleep and dream that whole bit.
and that fucking battle was the most anti-climactic peice of celluloid i have witnessed in a long long time.
i read ebert's review today before going to get in line and it really lifted my spirits and heightened my hopes.now i'm afraid that siskel may have wasted his only wish in heaven and ended up watching this with a very bored st. peter asking him continually what a midichlorian is and if there contagious!
well don't worry st. pete i think midichlorians are only dangerous with repeat viewings,so i think your going to be alright.
so a few minutes ago i located a stray bottle of beam i misplaced sometime or another and now feel obligated to get completely crocked and erase this night and this movie from my mind.
i can only hope the midichlorians don't react badly with huge amounts of liqour! -
ALRIGHT, so anikin is christ and qui-gon is john the baptist and the midichlorians are responsible for the force.
i gotta stop bitchin' for a minute cause i'm driving myself crazy.i enjoyed the sabre fight at the end,qui-gon pausing in meditation waiting for the shield to drop was inspired and one of the stand out moments of the film and even though darth maul was cheated out of so much screen time that bit of shit eating grin that appeared on his face while he paced back and forth waiting to get ahold of qui-gons ass was rather chilling...OH FUCK WHO AM I KIDDING THE GODDAM MIDICHLORIANS ARE HAVING SOME STRANGE EFFECT ON ME ...MUST....PUT....DOWN..BOTTLE... MUST..PUT ..DOWN.. -
Remember to put quotation marks around "review". We *ARE* talking about a guy who has invested the better part of the month WAITING to see this movie... LOL
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May 19, 1999 5:58:44 PM CDT
SO WHAT DOES THIS MEAN FOR ALL OF THOSE PREQUEL SITES
by xavier masterson
I DON'T KNOW ABOUT YOU BUT I JUST DON'T CARE ABOUT WHAT HAPPENS NEXT.
WHATS IT MATTER IF EPISODE II IS GREAT.ITS THE BEGINNING THAT REALLY MATTERS AND LUCAS HAS SCREWED THE POOCH!
SHAME ON STEVEN SPEILBERG FOR SAYING THIS IS AN INSTANT CLASSIC,BUT I GUESS THERE WAS NOTHING ELSE HE COULD OF SAID,LUCAS BEING ONE OF HIS BEST FRIENDS.
BUT YOU THINK HE COULD OF GIVEN SOME SECRET HAND SIGNAL DURING THAT 60 MINUTES INTERVIEW TO LET US KNOW WHAT HE REALLY THOUGHT! -
Well, I've gotta say. Xavier is on the mark here. I went in with the intention of forcibly suspending my disbelief...guess I didnt have enough of those midi critters flowing through my veins to hold out.. every time I found myself being sucked into the movie, whether due to the fantastic effects, or just the fact that, "hey, this is Star Wars!" I'd be slammed out again by one thing or another. I mean, this movie was slapstick. A movie for kids? This is a babysitting film....the kind you will become very annoyed with as your 6 year old sits down to watch it for the 100th time.... The plot contrivance button was used about 30 times too many.... did Jar Jar do ANYTHING worthwhile that wasnt a total accident? How bout Anakin? And whats with all the modern earth references?
And what the hell was R2 doing in that fighter anyways? How did he get up in there?
Oh, and by the way, we get it. Big fish eats little fish. Thanks for the clarification.
AUUGHH..
What I did like. Hmm..the duel at the end was excellent...(what the hell were those red force shield things for, anyways? And why did they have to take the fight to yet another Empire lightsaber duel set?) ...Obi and Qui I enjoyed....Portman was good.. the f/x was fun to watch. Seeing the Star Wars logo on the screen and the scroll.. the Titan AE trailer looks interesting.. Oh, and watching the trilogy SE on laser disk, complete with big screen TV and killer system before the show.
I don't know...Yeah, I'm going to see episode II. I have to, its Stars Wars. I just hope it gets better.. and no, I dont see this beating out Titanic. There will be quite a few less repeat viewings than originally expected.
As far as all these positive reviews..I just dont understand...Denial? Everyone I saw this film with was disappointed(eight people.)
As the movie started, there was a hum one could feel within the audience...people were clapping, cheering.. When the movie ended..the audience just sat there, glancing around. No clapping.
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I take back everything I said about Ep. 1 being so-so. I will never again diss a movie I have not yet seen (kicks self upside the head). This movie defies belief! True, some talky parts dragged on, but in other parts it was like information overload, all the sights and sounds to digest. It's like I was 8 years old watching EMPIRE again! I'd love to be the director that tops this movie because THAT movie would be one hell of a flick. Thanks Lucas, and I can't wait to see it again.
One other thing: When ticket prices hit ten dollars, let's boycott theaters, because this is getting out of hand. -
My two cents: I loved it!!!!!!! My face hurt from smiling so much. I felt like I was 10 again (age at first viewing of Ep IV). And, with no apologies - I LOVED Jar Jar. He was the comic relief, yes, but he also served more of a purpose to the story than C-3PO ever did.
To all of those who were disappointed / hated the movies - I have this to say - What f*ing movie did you see?!?!?!?
I think most of those who disliked it went to the theatre w/ preconceived notions about certain characters and situations. Try to remember what it was like to see a movie before the Internet was around.
I loved it. And Jar Jar too. -
May 19, 1999 9:10:14 PM CDT
RE: ZombieFodder & all those other mindless Lucas zombies
by the mad hatter
To all of those who loved the movie - I have this to say - what fucking movie did you see? This flick will insult the intelligence of anyone who watches it, INCLUDING THOSE UNDER 10 YEARS OF AGE!!! It really is that bad! If you loved it then I seriously question your state of mind. George Lucas has succeeded in performing his Jedi-mind trick on all of you. You're no longer capable of rational and independent thought.... The guys who adore TPM are probably the same people that said "Armageddon" and "Godzilla" were great films!
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Just saw Phantom Menace 4:00 am show at the brand new mulitplex theatre in Toronto. Too bad it wasn't on the IMAX screen they have because the f/x rules.
If George was in front of me, I'd give him a nice friendly shake (friendly only because of ANH,ESB,ROJ and advancing f/x tech). TPM missed the mark. I was sitting there and like the Jedi, was feeling a strange distrubance. The movie was on the way but it didn't feel like it made it all the way. Jar Jar, fine comic relief, but way over used. Too much Jar Jar is a bad thing. Not enough Maul. Need more Maul. Jedis are cool, way cool. Hope Samuel Jackson comes back with bigger role in II. Anakin (Jake L.) way too much over acting - but yeah more the fault of script. Speaking of speaking script. This was the biggest screw up. What's with the modern day 20th Century North American slang-crap-street-playground dialog? Speak english, plain, fully formed words, because: "If you can say what you mean, you can mean what you say", hence not as effective. Oh, its also not an issue of kid movie vs adult movie. Its good vs bad. Tighen the actors lines, replace some Jar Jar sceens with more Maul and it would have been much better. Oh, and lighten up on all the references to virgin-birth phrophet caused by special Jedi cell stuff. It be totally fantasy, the movie I think should find the least references to our "real world" connections, like hinting Anakin is the Saviour. It's not creativity, it's stealing from a much older story, the one were a cool old guy parts a sea to free the slaves. In Episode II or III has Anakin parting any body of water or obstruction to free any desert living slaves would be a total rip off. Ok, what's done is done. Please E II -> more character development, more human acting, darker, more like Empire, serious, tense, less a fun-ride and more gripping adventure. Oh yes, don't need to make up weird shit to explain stuff like the Force. To know it exists and is mysterious is good enough. Making up half-assed half-science stuff belongs to Star Trek not Star Wars. Can't wait to see EII to see if George has learned anything. -
There is simply no other way to put it: In my entire life, I've never seen anything that fucking rocked the way that light-saber duel at the end did. My heart pounded. Maul kicked ass. It blew me aawaaay!!!
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Hype, Schmype! Phantom Menace ROCKS!
Did anyone else notice that crazy Senator with the light up finger?
I can't pinpoint the exact scene, but I'm quite sure in the lower left side of the screen there is a thingy with four of Speilberg's
pals chillin' in the Senate.
Anyway, I'm sure you'll agree that it was well worth the wait. Although, I am curious if Mace's Lightsaber is the one that says, "Bad Mutha Fucka" on it.
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I'm back at work here in Austin after an amazing night of film.
Xavier is a fucking moron and should find some other way to spend his time, other than trashing people's life work.
I'm 25 and, as has been posted previously, my eyes widened as soon as those all too familiar words appeared...
IN A GALAXY FAR, FAR AWAY...
I never looked at my watch. I never got taken away from the awesome story and was baffled by the artistry of all involved. And if you know ANYTHING about ebonics, JarJar is a RIOT!!!
Enjoy...let it take you away. Don't wrap yourself in cynicism and reviews, just go see the film! I'll be there again tonight at 7pm! -
Yeah, these people are so dumb it's unbelievable. They've bought into everything that Lucas has used to delude them. I think they'd believe the sun shone out of his asshole if he said it himself! Actually, I don't take any real notice of their opinions anyway. I know that they're only helpless victims of Lucas' propaganda machine! I pity them, rather than condemn them! Wasting all these years of their lives when they could've been doing something productive. It's a crying shame! But one's things for sure, I better see an honest review out of fat-ass Knowles or I'm gonna show him no mercy!! That guy has been in 100% denial from day one, and I sincerely hope that he's belatedly come to his senses.
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Hello.
Obviously you didn't care for the movie and no one can really question that. You are, as has been said in these Talk Backs uncountable times, entitled to your opinion. What I am wondering though is how you can say that you "seriously question the state of mind" of those who enjoyed the movie. What exactly is your problem? Who do you think you are? And tell us, since your opinion is apparently gospel, what is a good movie? I want to know so I don't miss it.
I enjoy the Talk Back, and the opportunity share thoughts and ideas with others. Its interesting to hear why some people like and dislike a given movie. But when somebody believes that others (with opinions not in alignment with their own) are beneath them, that clearly states something about that person--that they aren't very nice people.
Question my state of mind. It's a movie for God's sake. -
Hey Mad Hatter, go suck on a lemon you miserable prick. I bet you're one of the pathetic minority who decided they wouldn't like this movie from day one and now you're too proud to go back on your word. In about 10 years time you'll be hailing this movie as a triumph of modern cinema just like all the other hypocrits out there who hated Star Wars when it first came out.
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Answer me this, please:
Why does anyone that enjoys "The Phantom Menace" have bad taste?And what exactly are we they in denial about?
That the movie is bad?
Says who? Oh. You say so.
Well what does that mean? Unless you are the Universal Arbiter of All That is Good in Cinema, I fail to see the logic in your decree that anyone that enjoys this movie is lacking good taste. Could you clarify that for us?
I'll bet it might have something to do with you taking pleasure in agitating others--folks that don't like being told they're less than you or anyone else because their opinion about a particlar movie does not coicide with your opinion. Is that it? Does that make you feel good about yourself?
Thanks for your help! -
I don't normally fill my posts with foul-language, but you've fucking pissed me off. Do you want to know who I am? I'm a fucking guy that's waited 16 years to see a new "Star Wars" movie, and for what? It was a fucking piece of shit! Anyone who can't see that is DELUDED!! The movie was overflowing with kiddie bullshit from beginning to end. This is NOT what I want from a "Star Wars" flick. I expected it to be more like "Empire Strikes Back", not fucking "Who Framed Roger Rabbit!" I'm sorry if you took offense to my comments, but right now I'm so fucking pissed I could eat Lucas for breakfast - AND PROBABLY WILL!!
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The Phantom Menace is what you get if you combine A Bug's Life, Armageddon and a sheet of acid. Totally bereft of human drama and completely geared to appeal to the lowest common denominator. I kept waiting for a moment of honest character interaction that made me give a damn about those people on the screen and all I got for my efforts was the screen jammed so full of "special" effects that I needed a Tylenol after the movie. I would trade millions of dollars in production value, all the Hollywood stars, all the toys, all the advertising tie-ins and every moment I spent anticipating this movie for just one NEW scene with the impact of Luke staring into the sunset in Episode IV. Yet, we were denied even one such moment of quality storytelling.
What a squandered opportunity....
Oh yeah, one example of weak moviemaking, the split second Maul was killed, I had a second to say to myself, "Please, don't make this like Under Siege (knife through the skull and head bashed through a radar screen) or Rambo (head exploded with a TNT arrow) where the bad guy has to die in a really sick, pointless and graphic way to please the righteous bloodlust of the slavering audience. That would really be just too cliche' and too Hollywood" Then it happened. (He was chopped in half and thrown down a bottomless pit) Not that the Darth Maul character was interesting in any meaningful way, but they killed him in over-the-top style anyway. That's when Lucas lost me for good. (And no, cool make-up and neat lightsaber doesn't make someone a meaningful character)
If Lucas needs to get one message from the Star Wars fan base and adult moviegoers in general, it is this: Just because we can jam one million special effect onto the screen at one time doesn't mean that we should. At some point it becomes a cluttered and superficial mess--like this movie. -
My, are you a self-righteous prick. Did it ever occur to you that I simply DID NOT LIKE THE MOVIE? I thought a message board was designed for a wide variety of opinion? Obviously you don't think this is the case. I'm sorry, but I've no time whatsover for people who tell me I'm a miserable prick simply because I hate a movie they love...Go fucking choke on that lemon you mentioned, you Lucas cocksucker! P.S : Yet again I apologize for my cussing, but they deserve it!
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May 20, 1999 1:28:38 AM CDT
It was like seeing a beautiful painting and a lesson in creativi
by spike lee
I loved the effects and it was a symphony of light and sound, but something was missing. The lightsabre battle rocked, and Jar Jar sucked hard, and most of the time you could not understand what he was saying. It was good, but a dissapointment. 3 out of 4 stars.
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Just got here (9:30), got home at 3am
It kicked ass, quite simply... two sequences in particular, the pod race and light saber fight/finale were worth the regular addmission price. It's a very dense flick (and it is a flick, a popcorn movie) both visually and structurally (there is actually a complicated plot and much expositional narrative, which is interesting because that was the major complaint of critics, that there was a dearth of structured narrative), other than that it's a kid's movie, a fan's movie, and deservedly so. The next one is supposed to be romantic, and the last episode is allegedly the darkest of the three...
but it's a great flick in the serial vein, and it made me leave wanting more...
The visuals are truly something to behold, like nothing I've ever imagined, and I'm glad Lucas finally has the tools he needs to tell his story.
The acting is somewhere above bland, as is the dialogue, but it is terse and never flags or bogs down, the film is never boring... I noticed Ben Burtt did the actual editing of the film, not only the sound design this time around, and it has a pretty good pace... kinda confusing during the space battle, less so during the podrace and saber fight.
And the Jar Jar character that has critics just up in arms about Lucas's play to kiddie fare, is just misguided in my opinion. The character is not nearly as annoying as the critics say, and actually, the audience laughed at all the pratfalls and throwaway lines uttered by the creature... it was amazing to watch a truly CGI character integrated so well into the film that you forgot it was an effect... you only have to see this thing walk through a sandstorm on Tatooine with the live actors to see how amazing the process of CGI has become.
Rather than wait in line (where there was a mulitude of costumed folks, lots of Darth Mauls, Vaders, not too many good guys actually, which shows you where people's hearts really lie I guess), my friend Paul and I went to Gordon Biersch (sp?) for brauskis... very good beer, and when we got back, the line was twice as long around the block (some had been there all day long), and we just walked on in, amidst waving lightsabers, and got great seats...
caveat: make sure, if you see it, to go to a theater with good digital sound... the theater we saw it in (AMC Burbank 14) had a nice screen and lousy sound... so, that means it's got to be seen again (aw shucks.) at the Chinese or Westwood Village at some point (but not right away)...
Seeing movies like this with first night audiences really makes a difference... the excitement was palatable and catchy. The cheers, laughter and oohs and aahs was constant and vigorous. All in all, a must see (through a kid's eyes that is), at least once, if not twice for full effect.
and that's that.
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Five Things:
1)
Ok, they're right, it is a huge
great-looking toy infomercial.
Star Trek's 2-4, can p*** on it
from a height measured in miles.
However, the damn movie IS WHAT IT IS.Yes, it would have been nice if
Lucas would've concentrated more
on bringing things up to a more
sophisticated level, but he didn't. So kwitcherbitchin, accept, acknowledge and move on.
Read the novels (screw the comics
though--except for Crimson Empire, they've been lame for about four years now) decorate your office with the junk and hope the next movie will be better.
2) Harry's essay was terrific: he's absolutely right; hanging out on line isn't about the movie, it's about the COMMUNITY. Sure, I've stood out overnight on lines that lasted nine or ten times as long as the damn show itself, but it was fun hanging out with fellow metalheads in the 80s and grungers in the 90s. (specially the grungers; more babes!)
3) Yu's little Skit was f**king hilarious!!!! copy it now B4 Har deletes it!!!
4) Media complaints: Dennis Michael on CNN web page (awesome Star Wars exclusive site BTW)
says the effects of TPM make Blade Runner seem like a four color child's drawing. Whoa, m*********r. Blade Runner is SACRED GROUND, and comparisons to TPM are wrong, useless, and heresy.
Then, you've got this other guy
from the NYPost.com who says something that a lot of reviewers are saying; First they say that the plot is simplisitic and lacking,and could have been summed up in a prescreen crawl, and then IN THE VERY NEXT PARAGRAPH they say how they were BORED by how COMPLEX AND LABYRINTHE the plot was, and couldn't keep hold of all
the changes and sub-plots.
JUDAS PRIEST!!!! Make up your
mind!!!!
5)Let me finally say that we're in danger if we start judging sci-fi's worth by how great the CGI is or how much it grosses.
That's like saying the Backstreet Boys and N'Sync are greater than Miles Davis or John Coltrane because they've sold more records and they make better videos.
If that's the case that means no one else should bother to make anymore flicks unless they've got a spare $150M+ to put up for CGI. ED WOOD is a terrific movie that illustrates this perfectly. He made films with absolutely no money, no talent, and no following, (at the time) but he keeps on doing it because he LOVES it and believes in what he's doing. DOCTOR WHO hasn't survived for decades because of it's cutting edge costumes and effects, but because it's a superbly written, wonderfully scripted show. Same for the original Star Trek. Let's not get too hung up TPM. Like Lucas himself said, "It's just a movie."
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Ahhh...I understand your anger. I've felt the same way about other movies. Truthfully, I won't see "The Phantom Menace" until tonight and so, I don't know if I'll agree or disagree with you (or lie somewhere in between). If I do like it however, I don't care to think someone considers me a buffoon for doing so.
It appears your expectations didn't allow you to enjoy the movie--mine were very similar, but I thought it was highly unlikely that I was going to get what I wanted. I've been very careful about what I've exposed myself to. Getting to see the movie without having it ruined in some fashion beforehand has been like crossing a minefield. I finally decided I could be happy just visiting the Star Wars universe again. There's quite enough cringe-inducing garbage from the original trilogy (burps, Tarzan-Chewie, Toshe Station, etc.) so I don't imagine TPM will be any different. Lucas' fantasy vision is very strong. Unfortunately it is diluted at times by annoying humor.
Anyway, I'm sorry you didn't enjoy the movie. Sixteen years is a long time to wait to be served what you feel is a big turd.
And by the way, please don't eat George (you'd probably choke on his neck!). I'd like to see this thing through. Even if I hate the movie, looking forward to it has been fun--this is one of the few things I've had to look forward to in my currently drab state of existence--work, school, sleep.
Peace. -
I am curious as to how the original three (Ep IV, V, VI) would have been discussed in forums such as this, had they existed when the films first came out. (Actually, early BBS's could have at least caught Jedi - but BBS were never as widespread as the Web.) Would they go something like this? Ep IV: "Gosh, all of the creatures in the cantina looked like guys in rubber masks." "The special FX, while amazing, hid the fact that there was no coherent story." "Luke whines too much." "C-3PO sucks. He just bitchs and moans and does nothing." Ep V: "Hey, you left the f***ing ending off of the film. It is just a ploy for another sequal." "The AT-ATs are there just to sell toys." "Yoda speak not correctly, can he. Not understand him talk, I do." Ep VI: "Ewoks" (OK, that one was voiced and is valid :-) ) "The spirt of Obi-Wan sitting on a log is just plain silly." "Carrie Fisher in the bikini thingy is just plain gratuitous." -- OK, just stoking the fires. ]:0-> -<
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I feel sorry for all those people who don't absolutely LOVE this movie. Even though I felt camping in line was a bit overboard, I believe that everyone who braved the elements got everything we as Star Wars fans wanted and needed. I can't believe I have to was 2 years for the next one. Put that movie next to the trilogy any day. It was unbelievable.
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A few things:
1. I thought the movie was really slow. It definitely dragged in points.
2. Jar Jar Binks was annoying as all hell.
3. Visually, it was absolutely spectacular.
4. All the criticism of Jake Lloyd was unfounded. He was actually the most alive actor in the film. Natalie Portman on the other hand...
5. And lastly, is it just me, or was it sorta weird to see Portman's much-older (looking, at least) character going for Anakin. I mean, the boy's practically a toddler. Thought that the age difference was a little creepy.
All in all, I must say I was disappointed. But I also realize that it was mainly a setup for Episode 2.
I'll probably see it again, but it won't be something that I see more than twice. -
I saw it last night and I thought that it was wornderful. The (vocal) minority of fans that hated it have complained about the acting and the characters. Did anyone go to Star Wars to see complex characters? Did anyone expect Shakesperian acting in this movie?? Newsflash: Jake Loyd is a 9 YEAR OLD KID!!!! I mean come on, is that the best you can do? The real reason people and critics hate it is because it is an event movie. It will make millions and millions of dollars. People forget it is the first of three new episodes, and the foundation for the rest of the stories. Why are people so bitter about the movie? Is it because they have not seen it? They have not even seen it yet!!! The backlash is so strong on this movie, so I was fearing that it would suck. But I enjoyed it tremendously. DON'T GET YOUR EXPECTATIONS TOO HIGH!! Darth Maul is not in it very much, but it leaves his character more to the imagination. Kids are the main focus of the movie, just like in 77'. It was made for them then, and it is made for them now. The kids that have seen the new movie are spellbound at it. They will grow up with the next two movies. Anakin is kind and bright in this movie, and by the end of part three, he will be the most evil person in the universe. One more thing, would it be easier to put a sign above Palpantine that says "I'm Darth Sideous"?
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sAW the midnight show last night and all I can say is that is was DEFINATLY worth the wait. This movie had everything one can expect from a film. Action, special effects, comedy, and a great story too. While it isn't as good as Empire or New Hope it is light years better then Jedi. The CGI creature looked SOO real it was as if they were standing on the same set as Neeson and McGregor! Jar Jar looked gteat, and wasnt very annoying either. I was petrified that his character would be the downfall of the movie but not only wasnt he annoying, he was actually pretty funny. I just wish I could understand him when he spoke! My favorite parts were the two headed podrace announcer, and the cameo appearance by ET! Well, only three years till episode II. Thats not too bad after waiting 16 years for this one!
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I have an idea. If you want to see this movie, then go see it. If you liked, ok. If you didn't, that's fine too. Life goes on, even after you disconnect.
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Well, made my 'young eyes' rant last night and read Xaviers rants for a while. (kinda want to see where his..wait this was almost cool.. trend ended up)and really got to thinking. What we're you expecting?
Yes Empire is still far and above the best of the StarWars films, as story and character and the other aspects that make a film 'critically' good, and it is still my favorite. But as for what makes a movie a good Star Wars film, I dunno. If you're looking for empire-esque character interaction wait for ep2, but dont hold your breath. Comparing similar story moments in the two... I dont see why the original films were much better than this. Ewan Mac Gregors scream of 'NO!' sure beats Hamill's Lip Twitchy I've got something in my teeth scream from Empire. When Anakin and Amidala have their 'moment' it's a tad awkward, but shouldn't it be? He's 9!!! As for a 'Luke staring off towards the horizon (a shot IMHO that worked so well only because of Williams theme) The events leading up to anakin leaving, His mothers eyes when she sees him bonding with Qui-Gon, and when he stops between them on his way out... that was as much of an emotion driven character moment as in any of the other films.
The Pod Race sequence was amazing, the announcer was cheesy, but I didnt HATE him, we all remember jabbas palace, who else would be calling a race sponsored by a hutt. Jar Jar was better than any ewok. Yes he was annoying, but in a overly eager dog kind of way... better than a cute fuzzy jub jub singing teddy bear.
The Saber battles were intense, and the Gungan attempt at a fight was hilarious.
So now im going to agree and disagree with everyone.
Yes it was a bad movie. Yes I loved every minute of it. Just like the other 3 cheesy Star Wars movies that came before.
(and if you dont realize that the other movies were cheesy too... think 'Tashi Station')
And NO lucas has not brainwashed me... I think he brainwashed you into thinking he was Spielberg, Scorsese, Lynch, and Kubrick rolled into one. Are we forgetting Willow and Howard the Duck?
The kids loved this movie as I loved the first film. I loved this movie like a kid would.
I remember my father (not much older than I am now) saying something along the lines of 'how can you want to see such a stupid, cornball film about some dumb whiny kid and a bunch of rubber aliens another time?'
------spoiler big time here (not that others havent said though)------
Last rant... Midichlorians.
This is the only iffy ground in this film. Lucas Dont take the mysticism out of the force. Dont pull a star trek on us all.
I think its an interesting concept but I want to know where he goes with it.
The Force should remain the mystical energy field...
so if these little things are just strong in the force and help one attune to it. fine. Explains the whole heredity thing and why some people just dont have it at all.
but if they 'are' the force as some are suggesting. then I will join the ranks of the pissed
Till then I'm a happy camper.
Wez -
Well, I just saw it and there were good parts and bad. But it wasn't how I had expected. First--I expected Jar Jar to be too cartoonish and "Ewok-ish". He actually wasn't too terribly irritating--maybe the Ewok factor wasn't there because he isn't a "cuddly" character. Cool stuff: Lightsaber battles--awesome! At least 500% better than the originals. Overall look and design of ships, droids, etc. fits in with SW but looks substantially different and fresh. CG--ended up being much more convincing than I thought. OK, there were 3 big irritations I had though. *1) The score--where was it??? I own the CD; it it way cool, but you almost don't notice it until the lightsaber battle! I think Skywalker sound just needs to crank up the volume. *2) The first half just had too much yappin'. Granted, you expect the first episode to explain things, but come on....this was too much. Lack of tension/cliffhangers was this movie's main fault. The middle part absolutely plodded. *3) Midichlorians = Star Trek techno-crap also = no continuity! Why were midichlorians never explained in the first 3? Couldn't Qui-Gon just have "felt" the force potential of Annakin? 4) Where was Darth Maul? Lucas should've written it so that the Nimoidians screw up at the very beginning, then Darth Maul is sent to get the operation running smoothly, like a military commander. Like Vader was--he mostly served as a military leader, but kicked ass with a lightsaber on occasion. We never get a chance to see him being cold and calculating. 5)And no one is horrified to see him--recall Alec Guiness and Mark Hammil's reaction to seeing Vader in ANH and ESB! 6) Only 2 sith at one time--WHY? This SUCKS, so at least explain it! 7) Annakin was rejected--again, please explain WHY? 8) Why don't the Jedi all get on a ship a open a can of whoopass on the Federation? 9) The space battle was nowhere near as dramatic as ANH or ROTJ. 10) The villians aren't even punished!!! If the good guys win, the villian is supposed to get his comeuppance! They don't die; hell, they don't even get arrested! 11) Does Annakin ever use the force? I couldn't tell. It would've been cool to see him use the force to move the broken bit of his pod back into place or something. Does all this mean I am disappointed? Hell no! If I am anything less than dumbfounded it is probably because I have seen all the pics on the net 6 months in advance.
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Just got back in from a Midnight and 8:00 am double feature. Went home and watched my tape of Thumbwars in between.... First of all: THANK YOU to all those who bitched at TPM... it kept my expectations at a more reasonable level, so that when I saw it for myself, I could be totally blown away !!! Detail-rich visuals, action sequences that really MEAN something, not just gratuitous show pieces. Unlike some posters, I felt Darth Maul had enough screen time... certainly were quality minutes. Jake Lloyd carried it off fine, I thought; but was maybe fed a couple too many cutsie lines of dialogue. Jar Jar... well he didn't bother me, but I went in with a positive attitude and it served me well. To all who haven't seen TPM yet: I envy you ! I'm looking in the Yellow Pages for a mind wipe right now... I wanna see it again for the first time !
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How could any of you give this a negative review?!?! It was Star Wars! And it was GREAT!!!!!!! I love this moive. I am so happy to have seen it the first day! LONG LIVE LUCAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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I live in the UK and like you all grew up on Star Wars. I have been waiting for this film for what seems like forever. We don't get the film for another two months and general opinion seems to be bad.
I first got the impression that Lucas had lost it after seeing the special editions with all their comic slapstick(ROTJ) and Greedo's death. It seemed like Star wars had been sanitised. Jar Jar looks and sounds like all the extra special edition crap, humourless and bland.(I thought the droids were the comic relief, hasn't george watched Kirosawa lately? They don't even seem to be in it.)
I know the SW movies are kid's films, but I can't quite imagine SW without a new space cowboy Han Solo type character. What would have the original star wars been like with out Han Solo, or perhaps more soberingly Harrison Ford.
No one seems cool. Sure they look cool, but that's it.
Did all you guys who think it's a fans duty to love this movie, like the improvements to the Special edition. If you did my worst fears have been realised.
I really fucking hate that bit where Han walks over jabba's tale, oh how the kids (5 and under) laughed.
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Saw the 12:01 show near Boston early this morning. Here's my take:
Qui Gon Jinn: Awesome. Dead.
Darth Maul: Awesome. Dead.
Ewan MacGregor as Obi Wan: Wasted. Underused. Natalie Portman: I am a dirty boy. Ha ha. Her 'Queen' character was kinda annoying, but I liked the handmaiden character. The Opening Crawl: When this happened, I was REALLY psyched. It induced
chills. I read it and said "Huh?"
Anakin's mother: Something about her was pretty sympathetic and nice. Now for the negatives. And, unfortunately, there are ALOT of them. Jar Jar: Hated. Hated more than I imagined I could hate him. In fact, there were thousands of Jar Jars. The entire Gungan race. I
Hated each and every one of them. Especially Boss Nass. The
fat frog. He suckled, and suckled hard. The Gungans were awful. Sorry to say, I consider the Ewoks to friggin rule HARD over these things. Every time they were on the screen, I disliked the movie.
Anakin: Cannot WAIT until he appears as a 21 year old in the next one. Jake Lloyd is a very bad child actor. Sorry, sad but true. There were lines delivered SO POORLY, I'm amazed that no one said "Uh, George? Do you HEAR how bad that sounds?" The "Midi-Chlorian" force-in-the-blood thing: So stupid. So very stupid. So
unnecessary. A blood test? In a
Star Wars movie? Uh _huhhhh_.
I also found myself thinking that the plot of the film could have been told in 20 minutes. However, that being said, I also now absolutely CANNOT WAIT
to see parts 2 and 3. These stories will be awesome. I AM pissed
that Darth Maul gets killed, but there are supposed to be Clones in the 2nd and 3rd ones, so he may be back. I PRAY that Jar Jar does not return. And the way the film ends, he doesn't need to. I hope. But he probably will. Fuck. Sooo.... Summary: 2 stars out of 4. At most. I loved the light saber duels. I
loved the Sith. Qui-Gon was great. He died. I wasn't too big on this film. I REALLY wanted to love it, but unfortunately I didn't. I'll probably see it again, just to be fair, but I swear to god I might walk out of the theater during the undersea part. Gahhh. Hey. Life goes on. I looked forward to it for years, it came, it went. I saw Blair Witch Project a few weeks ago, and it has since become one of my favorite films EVER. That is coolness. And even with my negative reaction to TPM, somehow I now look forward to Episodes II and III even MORE. I know how good these chapters could be. I realise, also, that Lucas is setting up the story with this first prequel, but he could have made it work in so many different ways. Whatever - it's his world, they're his toys. If I want something better I should try to make it myself, right? -
Where the hell is Jumbo's review of TPM???? Did he explode
after viewing it? Gosh, hope not, I can't wait to see the Talkbacks after
everyone reads his 896000 word so-called
review. I'm seeing it tonight, looking forward to it. Seems to be a
love-it or hate-it flick. -
There is only one way to settle this.
Gather up all the people who loved it and all those who hate it and: Lightsablers at dawn, (Actually lets make it at 12:01am.)and slug it out.
Yes it is just a movie.
Even the best of movies have people who love and hate it. Take all time money/Oscar champ Titanic for example. I can't stand that thing. I would give me the greatest pleasure if Darth Maul beat the crap out of Leo What's His Name?'s character from that movie. But there are tons of people who like it. I dig Babaylon 5 and I'm the only one I know who likes it. While I sat in the theatre, I enjoyed the ride. But come on, you guys who are die hard for TPM must admit that you would rather see more Darth Maul getting really nasty vs. Jar Jar flopping around? I think the ingredients were there but in the end the final product was alittle off the mark. Lets just hope in ST II and III, the formula flows better. It would be great if George could pickup on some of the critism; not to change his story tell per say, but just to re-enforce areas that make a great movie. Can't we have a movie that appeals to everyone? I think ST IV and V do just that. -
but how's the sound???? nobody's said nothing about Dolby Digital Surround EX...I'M WAITING!!!!
-
Obviously the film is not going to have the depth and darkness of empire. This film is setting the scene for the next two, which will be darker, but still aimed at kids. I think thats your whole problem that you have expected a dark and adult themed film and you've got a kids film. But I'm sure if you saw a new hope now, instead of when you were a kid, you would think thats a piece of shit as well. I think your expectations have got a bit out of control over the past 16 years and I'm sure a lot of other people's have as well. I just wish people would enjoy the film for what it is and not for what they want it to be.
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I saw TPM twice now, once at 12:03 am and again at 9:00 am. And I must say I enjoyed it a lot. There are flaws to be sure, but it's a kid's movie and you have to approach it that way. Although I have to say that the fart joke was totally unnecessary, especially coming not long after the successful poo joke. Wait a second. Weren't there TWO groin shots to Jar Jar in this movie?
Midiclorians? Yippee? Where was Darth Maul? On the bright side, ET was actually a nice addition to the Star Wars canon. I wonder if they'll make an action figure. Perhaps a special premium sometime in 2001. I don't know, I think I need a nap. I hope we don't have to wait until Episode III to see Natalie Portman in a metal bikini. I need rest. -
Not that i hated the movie, but that was an excellent list, Monster Vision, and right on the money. How the hell did you compile it? Also, I can't believe you left off the UNBELIEVABLY INCONGRUOUS, tacky, buzz killing and simply wrong wrong wrong!!! two headed sports caster at the pod race - the modern day ESPN-style patter in that scene was enough to turn this movie into a parody of itself. Mind you, I saw the film at 3:30 am so I'm not sure what was in the movie and what was just an imagined product of sleep deprivation. I'd like to think it was the later.
Fortunately, the pod race (which is excellent) was saved by the tusken raiders taking pot shots at the pod racers. Damn, that was funny! My favorite call back to the other movies and the one that seemed the least forced.
Pacing, George. Pacing. Look it up. -
Jar Jar must die! Okay, that is enough negativity. I went to see the midnight showing in Austin and it was great to be among the excited fans. I did not go in with the greatest expectations because of all the negative hopla about the characters and plot. But seriously...I did not want to see a Star Trek movie. The visuals were incredible and Ewan McGregor was the shit! His dual with Darth Maul was the most exciting part of the movie for me. I wished we could of seem more of Samuel L Jackson though. But all and all, the movie was great. I was not disppointed at all. I am going to see it again today to absorb all the great special effects.
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is it just me, or did you guys notice that the name of the canidate running against senator palpatine was named bail ANTILLES from alderaan? just checking.
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Went to catch TPM at the 12:30 AM showing at Evans 12 in Augusta,GA. Drug my wife along; she's a fan of the movies; but not to the extent that I am (few are ;)). Got to the theater at 6:15 and were #5 in line. Had several people dressed up in line (how damn embarassing is that?) Even got to be interviewed on TV; very cool.
AS for the film; I have been waiting since Jedi back in '83 for this movie; and while it was OK, there were some problems. Number 1: WHAT THE F**K IS UP WITH THE PIGEON JAPANESE THE TRADE FEDERATION IS SPEAKING? Absolutely horrid. Every time they talked, I flinched. I personally felt embarassed to be exposed to that. WTF was George thinking? I kept expecting one of them to turn to the other and say, "Tank yu, my numbah one son". THis is my main gripe with the film.
Number 2: Underdeveloped Villains: Here we have Darth Maul, one of the coolest looking villains to grace the screen since; well; Darth Vader. He gets 4 LINES in the whole movie? What is THAT about? An extra 10 minutes of him and Sidious interacting as Liam and Ewan did would have helped a lot. And where would that extra 10 minutes have come from, you ask?
NUMBER 3: Jar-Jar. Yeah, 10 minutes less of him would have been about right. He wasn't as bad as I thought (he was actually pretty damn funny during the final battle) but he was WAY overused. It was like seeing Jim Carrey in a Star Wars movie. He was taking overacting to the extreme. And I read the novel beforehand, so I knew what he would be saying, and I still had a hard time understanding him (and my poor wife got almost nothing he said, but she liked him because he was "so cute").
Number 4: Midichlorians?
Now, what was Great:
Number 1: Liam Neeson.
Number 2: Ewan Mcgregor.
Number 3: Darth Maul-yeah, he was not developed, but the scene where he and Qui-Gon are waiting for the forcefields to drop so they can resume their battle,where Maul paces restlessly back and forth, his eyes never leaving Qui-Gon, W-O-W, intense. Ray Parks did a remarkable job for his first role.
Number 4: The effects-this movie is like a CGI wet dream.
Number 5: The music
I'd like to address the "see it through a kid's eyes" issue. I saw ANH in '77, at 13. I saw the the reissue in 97 at 33. My reaction to both was THE SAME. I LOVE Star Wars and no, JMS, Lucas hasn't Brainwashed me. These films touch me like no other (all 3 did so). This one , while I thought was good, didn't. I would have a hard time finding fault with anything in the first 3 movies. I even loved Jedi, ewoks included. This one had faults I couldnt get past (see above) Especially that DAMN PIGEON JAPANESE! My opinion of Lucas' genius has dwindled somewhat, although I still think he is one of the best visionaries in Hollywood History (hey everyone makes a few mistakes). Bottom Line: Go see it, maybe twice to catch all the effects and choreoghraphy). You will enjoy it, but not as much as ANH. -
I dont know, but ive read a lot of reviews, and what all of them seemed to suggest was that the movie was much better on a second viewing. Maybe some of you, instead of whining, should take a second look ?
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This guy is a joke. What kind of site like this abandons its readers on what he has made its biggest day???
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First off, the THX-EX sound was fine. Sounded good. Didn't strike me as being particularly 'better' than other films I've seen in the same theater when it didn't have the EX system. Secondly, it's fucking incredibly stupid to tell someone that their opinion of a film isn't valid simply by assuming that someone didn't view it under the "right conditions". Come on. I didn't enjoy the film all that much. It's not because I "lost my inner-child" or because I let other negative reviews sway my opinion, or because it's fun to rebel against the "event film of the summer", it's because I never found myself sucked into the movie. Which is too bad. On the other hand, to all those who deem that anyone who enjoyed themselves only did so because they unquestionably enjoy anything George Lucas lays his hands on, or that they actually hated the movie but refuse to admit it, how fucking dumb is that? Try giving people a little credit.
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You know, a movie can be funny thing - but what is happenning right know is exceptionally amusing.
I live in the UK and will find it very intresting to see if anyone camps out for a month outside my local flea pit (wouldn't recomend it, when the pubs empty out it could get intresting).
I really hope that you people queuing have something else in your lives, because it could really mess you up, and just a note to finish on - people are camping for a month so I would assume they have no job, so I assume they are on the social. Now in the UK at least, you must actively seek employment when your are getting the dole (social) and I guess this may be difficult when you are camping out side a theatre. SO what happens (though its a bit late now) if some little social servant decides to take a trip down to the Chinese and find out there fiancial arrangements - really mess them up wouldn't it. You've spent a month camping for a movie that (allegedly) sucks and now you are in the poo with the goverment.
james
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I'm not going to be able to see it for a couple of days, and was hoping Harry or someone would post something by now (3:30 central time). I guess they either couldn't get him out of the theater, or he's passed out in his tent.
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Before I get into the "organisms in our blood" deal, I need to convey my reactions to TPM.
Two words come to mind ... "Colossal Disappointment." I feel this way for several reasons:
1) Complete lack of character development.
2) Complete lack of tension. Watching the jedis beat the hell out of the droids was about as exciting as watching a 300 pound air conditioning repairman beat up a coke machine. Also, the Galactic Senate doesn't seem to care about Naboo - why should I? By the way, George, telling people that there is pain and suffering is significantly less impactful than SHOWING the pain and suffering.
3) Holes in the plot - Can anyone tell me where the Federation ships went? There was only 1 left at the end. How exactly did Anakin get the parts for the pod and 3PO? If he get them from Wato, than we is Wato going to "buy it" from him. I also loved the fact that Anakin's mother's "place is here." As a friggin' slave!
There are more, but it's pointess to go on. I am going to give it 1 more shot and see how it goes. Perhaps my opinion is colored by what I expected the story to be. I doubt it, but I'll try.
With regard to the Midchloridians, their inclusion is pretty obvious. Eventually, the jedis are going to get their asses kicked, and droids aren't going to do the trick. I believe this is a plot device for the downfall of the jedis.
I'm surprised that no one has mentioned that 3PO was left behind. Looks like "Annie" is going back for Mumsy. -
Ominous silence from Harry. I'm thinking maybe he was so disappointed with the movie that he up and strangled himself in his Darth Maul Underoos. On the other hand, Harry, if you haven't yet shuffled off this mortal coil, SPEAK UP, BOY!
-
May 20, 1999 4:48:17 AM CDT
Perhaps Harry is recovering from his reality-shattering disappoi
by voice of sanity
Perhaps all the attempts to "view the movie as your inner child" failed and instead it was judged simply on its merits as film.
And consequently found lacking... That or his review is just so goddamned long that it won't be done until the weekend. -
Your silence speaks volumes...
-
'Nuff said.
-
OK, so you loathed it. BFD! I loved it. "BFD" you say. I don't care (and that, I suspect, is what you're really pissed about). Feel free to hate it for all time. Let it turn you into an obsessed, institutionalized nut if you like. Vent your hate, it's your right. I'm going to feel free to love it too. But I'm not going to try to stuff that love up anyone else's ass. What is it with you? Don't you see that the hostility you inspire is caused not by your dislike of a movie but by your insistence that anyone who doesn't rally around your oppinion is an idiot? Do you really think that your views are that much more valid than the rest of us? Or are you so insecure that you need everyone to tell you that you're right all the time? And get your head out of there before you strangle yourself with your own rectum. Jeez!
-
Listen, when Harry comes out with his review he faces a problem. Is he honest and face being shut out by Lucas and hollywood types? Or does he claim to absolutely love this movie and lose the respect of his readers?
As for me, the Gungans just have to go. Jesus, it was like slapstick watching these morons.
Did they speak Reggae?
And did anyone hear the battle droid respond to orders by saying
"roger roger" Are you kidding? What stormtrooper would say roger roger to Darth Vader? It made them even seem comical.
Be honest with yourself guys, you can be disappointed. Just be honest. -
You are a dumb fuck, my man! If you're so unconcerned about MY fucking opinion, why did you feel such a pressing need to inform me about yours? I think you're an arrogant little fucker, who should respect someone else's point of view! Are you fucking telling me that I can't inform anyone of what I thought about the movie? Go suck Lucas' fucking dick, you pathetic asshole! Come back when you fucking respect a person's opinion... Jeez, what a bunch of dickheads!
-
Maybe Harry realizes that his dream has come to a tragic, but obvious end. I am waiting to hear news reports that a fat guy in Austin, with a wild beard, walked into his local multiplex and started shooting. That would make a lot of sense, really!
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I hardly ever come here, but I was interested to see what the fans thought
of TPM. I feel a warm glow of triumph that to many, TPM is a load of
*@#~! I am not a Star Wars fan by any stretch of the imagination, but my 2 friends
are and their all like "Oh this new films going ot be totally amazing and wipe the floor
with every other film" and I've just been there saying "Yeah right, its gonna be crap" and
I always seem to win arguments by reeling off the bad things in the film. Like Jar Jar Binks.
Its gratifying to know that I have been right all this time - Jar Jar is the most annoying thing to hit
celluloid. I knew it from watching the trailer. Hell, I knew it the first time I saw a picture of
him in a movie mag.
And what the hells all this about telling the force from blood tests? EH? My friend has the novel and said some bull about
these little "force parasites" that go around in the blood? Whatthefekisallthatabout???!!!
Now, I havnt seen TPM yet (I live in the UK. Could somone tell me when its released here?
I think it 16th June but I'm on holiday then so I miss all the hype! Is it June or July? Somone tell me!!!)
and I know theres a few who would like to swap places with me (either to experience it first time or just so their
minds arnt insulted by watching this travesty of cinema) It seems TPM is a film you either love or hate.
I think I'm gonna hate it, but I'm going to try and go in that cinema with an open mind. Perhaps films are better
when you have low expectations. I thought Titanic was going to be absolute pants...and when I saw it
I was just blown away. My personal fav film of all time! I doubt TPM will be better than Titanic, but it will obviously make more
money. But then thats cos you cant buy Titanic action figures. -
I must have hit pretty close to the mark to make you foam at the mouth like that. So everyone has to listen to your oppinion but they can't express their own? Do you work hard at being such a hypocrite?
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Hi all. The Phantom Menace was a great movie. Thats Right GREAT! GET OVER IT! It seems that some of you don't get the movie or don't appreciate its richness. Heads up Folks. The orginals were not THAT good! Yes, we all loved them. Yes, we're die hards...but our imaginations and our willingness to suspend disbelief made the experience.
We didn't question the movies, we just loved them.
Now in our old age we are plagued by a lack of imagination and a critical eye. Its only function is to take the fun out of things and make us feel 'adult" because we can find fault. Go back and watch the orginals with the same critical eye and watch your enjoyment disappear.
Know why the younger generation "got" SW's? Because we were not yet adults with all the baggage that comes with it.
I think those of you that didn't enjoy this movie have become your parents and you don't even know it!
Peace
6277
-
Look I don't know how many people actually read the comments on these films but this I how I view what, amongst fans, is a controversial issue. I had a few complaints about Ep.1, Jar-Jar was a little to clumsy (but I still thought he was an OK character), the fart joke was stupid, the tuskan raiders too comical, the pod-race commentators too contemporray. Be that as it may--I'm already growing tired of people who are saying that the film lacked the heart or comedy of the first 3 films or script or development. THERE WAS NONE OF THAT STUFF IN THE ORIGINAL FILMS EITHER!!!! Face facts--YOU WERE 16 years fucking younger when you saw it. Watch Ep.1 with the eyes of a 6 year old and enjoy the ride. It is Fucking STAR WARS for pete's sake--don't overcriticuze it. It may not be an "Empire" but it's still fun. Enjoy it as you would "Jedi" sure it was silly but is there any doubt that this film will become just as much as part of the vernacular as any other.
Quit your bitchin,
Horchata
p.s. Too the guy who said that Titianic was his favorite move and that's why he doesn't think Ep.1 will do better than it--well, I think you've painted your "opinion" in pretty clear terms. -
I'm kinda new at this, but is it a prequisite to read all of the other comments before posting? If so, then you guys need to cut it down a little, if I wanted to read something this long and boring, I'd go to Church.
But, Jim Ryalto, who in the two previous posts I've read by him, managed to make me hate him more than anyone who posts here, (Even that insufferable JMSPOWER Bastard who I hope comes out of a theater talking shit and gets ass raped by an angry group of STAR WARS fans determined to show him what a bitch he actually is.) but, you made so much sense and came across honestly here that (For the time being.) I'm changing my mind.
For the most part I think you're right and there were things happening in a next level kind of way in this film. I've seen it twice and I've come to pretty much the same conclusions that you have.
You see, what I think we can derive from the Midichlorians, (Which I must admit I hated so badly when I first heard about them.) Is simple.
NO ONE KNOWS WHAT MAKES CELLS OR THE BASIC OPERATION OF LIFE WORK!
No one, no one knows this. People try to write it off to electrical impulses, the idea of having a SOUL or other things, but I have trouble with almost all of them.
The thing about the Midichlorians is that they live inside us in a symbiotic reltionship, a go-between, between us and the Force. This is the idea that I will hold until Lucas tells me different. I like this idea, an organism that speaks to the Force and which would explain, (At least for STAR WARS purposes) why we live. This is an idea I have fallen completely in love with and you cynical bastards aren't talking me out of it.
But, in all THE PHANTOM MENACE was so incredible, so amazing, so wonderful and SO DEEP! (If you can't see it, watch it again, this film works on about 500 levels.) I love this film, I will see it again, it is a beautiful experience and something to glean a million answers from.
STAR WARS is indeed a religious experience and a so much more satisfying one than the available options. (Not that I'm going to open a SKYWALKER CHURCH any time soon.) The best part is, it's inspiring, it's beautiful, it's the kind of story that no one makes anymore. It's not for children, it's for everyone.
Thank you, everyone who loves this film. And to the rest who don't, well who cares what you think? I don't.
This film is the kind of thing we don't see enough. I hope Lucas lives a great, long life and changes his mind about futher sequels. He's the only one who makes myths I can truly believe in. -
I had the misfortune today of having to sit through Star Wars for the second time. The first time was last week when I was able to get into a press screening in New York. I must admit, I'm not a big sci-fi fan, and I fell asleep. Today two friends talked me into going to see it . So I said fuck it,why not? I wanted to give it another chance. I went to the 1215pm show in Danbury,CT. There was no line, and I got to see it for $4.50. So right off the bat I was in a good mood. I felt good about the fact that unlike those morons who stood in the rain on line all day and night at the Zeigfeld,( some of which now have pneumonia and are unemployed) I had the good sense to wait one day. This time it took twenty five minutes for me to fall asleep, instead of the 15. I kept waking up to talking creatures,and really stiff acting and dialogue, of which none was more annoying than Jar Jar's. I'm sure the Jamaican community appreciates the way Lucas made them look, by giving one of the dumbest, most unfunny characters in screen history, a Jamaican accent. Episode One and Cool Runnings, I heard are playing as a double feature in Jamaica on Jamaican pride day. O.k. let's get back to the movie. It's pretty obvious Lucas is EL HOMBRE when it comes to special affects, and manipulating the media. Nobody does it better. Who else would announce that advanced tickets would not be sold, then turn around and announce that they would be available two weeks before the movie opened, just to create more excitement? A Genius. Who else would give Samuel L. Jackson, one of the most highly respected actors in the business, five minutes of screen time, and Jar Jar Binks sixty. A Genius who knows full well that Jar Jar dolls will sell much more than Mace Windu's. I'm not even going to start on how bad Jake LLoyd's performance was. My hoes on their worst night, have more talent than that poor kid. There was a scene where you could literally see him making an effort not to laugh. Aside from the fact that the kid was adorable, he really didn't look like he belonged up there on that screen. The kid looked nervous, and rightfully so. He's being directed by a Genius.
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