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Is KUNG-FU PANDA The “KILL BILL Of CGI Animated Films”?!
Hey, everyone. ”Moriarty” here.
Today’s reviewer seems to think so.
And before you start yelling plant, consider this. No less an avowed Dreamworks-hater than Jerry “Cartoon Brew” Beck recently wrote on his site that KUNG-FU PANDA is one of the best CGI animated features ever made, comparing it to THE INCREDIBLES. Go ahead... call Beck a plant. I dare you. There’s no more independent voice writing about animation online these days, and his opinion on the film only confirms what I’ve been hearing since last year... KUNG-FU PANDA appears to be the real deal, a kung-fu film for kids that plays like no-shit Shaw Brothers.
God, I want to see this thing right now. It sounds so awesome.
Hey, guys. Long time reader, first time contributor. I just got back from an advance screening of KUNG FU PANDA at the AMC Loews Meteron in San Francisco. It didn’t seem like a “test screening” exactly – the movie was 90% done (the other 10% was in storyboard or animatic form) and I don’t know how much they could really change at this point, though there were two studio reps with clipboards outside, asking for people’s opinions. Overall, I loved this film, and I am not a Dreamworks plant. Here, I’ll prove it: I hated SHARK TALE. Hated, hated, hated, hated, HATED the fuck out of SHARK TALE. If I had the money and resources I would buy up every copy of Shark Tale, bulldoze them and burn the remains.
Dreamworks’ formula, of course, has been to fill their movies with as many huge A-list stars as possible, then use THAT to market the movie. This has been a double-edged sword: on the one hand, it gives the creators of the films license to sneak in some cartoonish subversion without it offending their corporate masters (OVER THE HEDGE), on the other hand it permits Jerry Seinsmelled to waltz right into Jeffrey Katzenberg’s office and hijack the entire animation department for the sake of ANOTHER animated insect movie, this one based on a crap pun title! And now that they’ve exhausted the well of fairy tale jokes and used mediocre marketing to somehow run Aardman (!!!) into the ground, Dreamworks has decided to make animated versions of genre films. First, with PANDA, they take on Hong Kong cinema, and next year they’ll take on Roger Corman B-pictures with MONSTERS VS. ALIENS IN 3-D. Ideally, it might have been smarter to reverse that order – sci-fi schlock was considered kind of a joke even in its heyday, and it’s relatively easy to openly, childishly mock the conventions of that genre and still say you’re “paying homage.” But based on sheer concept, KUNG FU PANDA sounds like it was designed to piss off geeks. Personally, I haven’t seen nearly as many Kung Fu movies as I should have, but I appreciate that to replicate such an exact genre, you need to possess the skill, patience and discipline of a kung fu warrior yourself. You CERTAINLY can’t muck it up with Joan Rivers cameos and references to cell phone commercials.
Fortunately, KUNG FU PANDA does not. As far as I can tell, they got the genre down PAT. My hats off to the crew here, who used animation completely to their benefit – since nothing in animation is spontaneous and everything has to be planned to the smallest detail, they were able to choreograph every last movement in every battle sequence to pinpoint timing and accuracy that would put Rube Goldberg to shame. Now I’m sure the supergeeks can point to each amazing action sequence in this movie and say “they stole that from Blablabla and watered it down, they stole THAT from Blablabla 2 and watered IT down…” But as a typical American moviegoer with a bulging stomach overflowing with popcorn grease, all I noticed was that the action sequences in this film kicked fucking ass. In particular, there’s a scene about halfway through the movie where the imprisoned villain of the piece escapes from his shackles with only a feather, and escapes from the prison with only his wits. I’m as jaded as any internet hipster, and this scene completely blew me away.
Oddly enough, the one big weak point in this movie is…the star. A little Jack Black goes a long way, and here, as the titular Po, he spends more or less the entire movie Being Jack Black, and all that that implies, from the “rock and roll” awe and wonder he gets from seeing his idols in action, to his nervous little “um”s and “yeah, well”s in the dialogue. I understand that the executives THINK you need stars and comedy to sell an animated film these days. Disney executives thought the same thing when they shoehorned Eddie Murphy into MULAN ten summers ago. Fortunately this film isn’t nearly as bad, but it still would have been far better if they hadn’t tried so hard to be funny – there’s only one scene where the laughs feel earned, and it comes from some of the physical humor when Master Shifu (Dustin Hoffman) uses dumplings to train Po. The film works so well as a legitimate animated kung fu movie that Jack Black’s “comedy” just kind of feels out of place. In fact, only about half of the casting choices feel especially sensible, at least on paper – Jackie Chan, James Hong and Randall Duk Kim are no-brainers of course, but David Cross is utterly wasted (though he does have a funny scene with Black where he awkwardly tries to get him to go away without rudely SAYING “go away”), and I wouldn’t trust Seth “Animation’s Inexplicable New Golden Boy” Rogen to water my lawn without incident, much less give me acupuncture as a frustratingly small kung-fu warrior. Fortunately, everyone does the best they can with the roles they have, and at times you even forget the wisened-if-justifiably-nervous Shifu is Ben Braddock.
The story is standard-issue – the universe is populated entirely by animals who act like humans, not unlike Disney’s ROBIN HOOD (the even have a bunch of rhino prison guards, the leader voiced by Michael Clarke Duncan, who look A LOT like Prince John’s rhino guards). Storywise, they don’t really do anything particularly new with the kung-fu genre, or even the “fat loveable loser makes good” genre. But in a way, that’s a good thing – like Tarantino, they seem to subliminally acknowledge that there IS no way to improve the story of a Hong Kong movie, because that’s not really the point – the best you can do is adapt the Hong Kong cinema formula to your particular style of filmmaking. It would not be stretching at all to call this the KILL BILL of CGI animated films (I even counted three pieces of music from KILL BILL they reused, though those may have just been temp tracks). The fact that they saved the inevitable "Kung Fu Fighting" remix for the end credits speaks volumes about the restraint Dreamworks showed here – they didn’t even resort to that old “the characters lips are out of sync because we’re making fun of bad dubs, look how funny we are” chestnut. With this and WALL-E, this is shaping up to be a good summer for CGI animation with minimalist dialogue, almost as if the medium itself was atoning for the Unnecessary Dialogue-choked HORTON HEARS A WHO. I wouldn’t be surprised if martial arts classes take a sudden upturn in youth enrollment following this film’s release – above all else, this film succeeds spectacularly in making kung fu look fucking AWESOME.
If you use this, call me NoodleDream.
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I like it
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I've been pestered by the Panda telling morons to shut off their phones a while now, but this seems rather interesting. I confess the thought of coming up with someting like PLANTATIOUS when reading the headline, but this guy seems to know what he's talking about. Although how do you know he's a reliable source since he., as he stated himself, is a first time contributor?
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...and I'll be giving this one a chance purely on the basis that it's got James Hong in it.
Lo Fan can do no wrong. -
... the classy wit, the sophistication, the delicate sensibility. I dance on your grave, good sir, and wish you were in it. And F*ck-Yu Panda will rule. That is all.
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it'll take a work of monumental genius to get me out of the "Dreamworks suck ass" frame of mind.
I'm open to having my mind changed, but doubt this will be the film to do it. -
Because Pandas...well, someone HAD to say it, right?
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Mar 28, 2008 5:45:19 AM CDT
I just feel the need to point out that Shrek is terrible
by industrykiller!
Some of the most overrated garbage around today. poor character design, terrible voices that those same actors have been force feeding us for years, and bad soon-to-be-dated jokes. There is literally NOTHING to love about that franchise.
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we get the picture, it's a good cartoon- it's called "Kung Fu Panda," but why would anyone with at least one pubic hair give a shit? :)
I'm kidding. If this is as good as the incredibles, nemo or toy story I'm torrenting it.
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With MAN-BEAR-PIG coming close second.
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You want it.
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Fences and bikes will now be in danger of little kids around the world.
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Dreamworks doesn'r care what you do with Shark Tale DVDs. They don't even care if you watch it, let alone bulldoze it. They just want you to buy it. In fact, they would prefer that you buldoze it instead of leaving a copy around, risking online piracy.
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...and how did they get the genre down him? ::Seinfeld grins, waits for chuckles, gets huffy and disappears for another decade. Crowd goes wild with gratitude:: (Nice review, BTW)
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... anyone who thinks SHREK is a franchise to emulate (for anything other than raking in mad cash from morons) is nuts -- there's no more overblown, soulless, instantly dated trilogy out there today... except maybe for those lousy BOURNE movies. =)
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Yes, I am close-minded about this, but those relentless fucking "turn off your cell phone" promos pissed me off more than I can reasonably explain.
As a result, I will probably only see this film if I'm stuck on an airplane with nothing else to watch.
Maybe time will dull my extreme bias, but I am not counting on it. Marketing execs, you blew it! -
... and then laugh about double dipping everyone with the DVD and then forget to actually do it. I'm still waiting for the whole bloody affair to come out on DVD, I've deliberately not bought the separate releases because of it!
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Holy shit, you just sold me on it. Between that and all the early great shit I'm hearing I'm finally going to give a Dreamworks CG feature a shot again.
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Wasn't Kill Bill the first kinda crap tarrentino movie... so calling this the kill bill of cgi is like marketing it as well as a kinda crap movie
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that makes me not want to see it
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Vastly over-rated and up its own arse, but, with a couple of cool bits?
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sounds like Dreamworks has done it right.
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Mar 28, 2008 7:10:10 AM CDT
I love Cartoon Brew when it's about animation history.
by derlanghaarige
But I don't give much about Beck's opinion on movies. It happens so often that he hates movies with no better arguments than "it's CGI". If I wanna read no-arguments like that, I would spend more times in talckbacks. And when someone like him seriously loves one of these CGI-movies, it only leads to two conclusions: It's really that good or he just received a nice present from Dreamworks.
I will wait till the movie is out and judge it by myself. -
...you're a trunction!
Please feel free to join the rest of us on planet common sense when you're ready... -
kung fu fighting remix is used in every freakin american movie kung fu sequence...its flippin old now...
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good lord
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Is what you call a rhododendron.
I'm so taking my nephews to this, but...I will wear a cup to prevent the pain from the inevitable kick to the groin after hyper child decides to emulate kung fu panda. -
DAVID CROSS. That's an automatic "Must See" for me.
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How original!
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movie over.
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and just because clueless kids and tasteless parents made it big won't change my mind.
Kung Fu Panda sounds sweet though. If I can overcome the gag reflex while on the box office I'll give it a try. -
Does that mean the first half is a well-made homage to chop saki and Samurai flicks from the 60’s and 70’s and the second half is self-indulgent, tedious bore?
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where he was raised by ninjas and tries to avenge his parents. god, that was one of his crappier films with his best being tommy boy. personally, i think that the whole "fat slob becoming hero though comedic story contortions" thing is more tired than the whole "white cop and black criminal" team up in unfunny action horseshit. but i like jack black, dreamworks cartoons and kung fu movies ever since orange county, the first shrek and enter the dragon so i'll give this panda thing a shot.
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I thought the second one was good. Felt like an actual satire rather than a stupid kids movie. Hated the first one and the third one though.
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Mulan wasn't Disney's best, and yes, in typical Disney style, they raped the source material, but all in all, I thought Mulan was pretty good and underrated. That little nugget kinda makes me doubt his film choice. And flame me all you want, but if this is almost the Kill Bill of animated films, then you can REALLY count me out. So it's a massively overrated, ego-stroking, anime fanboy jerkoff flick? All they need is a second one that drags on endlessly with no real money shot.
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Well said, young man.
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Freaking hysterical. Can't wait for this.
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That was pretty well written. You should see more sneaks and report on them, Noodles.
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So it rips off a bunch of better movies and passes it off as its own? Actually, I enjoyed Kill Bill (especially part 2) but shouldn't this be aiming for a more iconic Kung Fu flick?
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That same Jerry Beck says at the bottom of his brief review: "I am currently working on a book (unrelated to Kung Fu Panda) for Dreamworks"
Unrelated, yeah. Writing a book for dreamworks, gives glowing review, no connection. -
You know it to be true.
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TO DO with Kung Fu Skunk? Because they have the same characters and and look.
Rocklover79, Mulan sucks. Its horrible. -
Mar 28, 2008 10:54:58 AM CDT
At least the characters don't look like the celebs voicing them
by osmosis jones
I *still* have nightmares about Shark Tale. [shudder]
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And not one out of the 6 was impressed with it in any way. They said it was simply "alright". I'll probably see it if I can catch it free somewhere, but after the "meh" reaction of all of them, I'm certainly not going to run out and pay money for it.
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I feel like going down to the st. louie zoo now telling some pandas to fuck off!
I'll give this film a shot. I mean, it's gotta beat going and seeing Iron man, right? (ANY movie beats Iron Man...) -
I actually like Kill Bill quite a bit. I think the things that irk me about Tarantino's films is Tarantino as a personality. He takes himself way too seriously. Of course, I need to learn to separate the movie from the filmmaker. I'm even one of those people who thinks Jackie Brown is under appreciated. It might be his best film. Anyway, whenever he comes out with a new movie you can be sure I'll be there opening night.
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don't churn out formula movies the way the CGI animated studios do. These things need to go away for a while.
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Master of the Foot Fist Way.
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...and is a GIGANTIC disappointment
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It's awful.
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Does anyone know if this has anything to do with the CW's Kung Fu Skunk? Because they have like the exact same animation and there is a Panda in that show. Too bad it comes on at the same time as Viva Pineta, my favorite Saturday morning hangover show.
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I caught that last week. I was hungover as well. I'd never seen it before. I'm still not sure what the fuck I was watching. It was hypnotic though, I couldn't turn it off.
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I agree with you about say 75%. Like Shrek 1 was boring but they ending was well done and made you feel like you magically had a really good time, even though you almost feel asleep a bunch. Shrek 2 is the only one thats worth a damn. That one does have a few jokes, mainly all from Donkey... well all from Donkey. I can't even remember 3. Also my problem with Shrek is that they make it seem that he learns some big lesson in the end (which is the point to 99% of all kid animated pics) and all and all he does. He just fucking gets his way, and its more like he just learns to put up with people and still be a dick. I just teaches kids to be spoiled and throw teper tanturms.
Also it boggles my mind that Dreamworks gets so much money off of there CGI (and cartoons when they did that) movies. The only movie they have ever done thats worth seeing is Over the Hedge. And I held out so long to see it because I just KNEW it was going to just suck hard. But it is very funny. Namely the last 15 minutes of the movie are fucking great. (Granted I totally fergot about the Futrama episode were Fry drinks 100 cups of coffee, which is funnier then the scene with the squirel but they are both good). -
How did Quintin Tarintino get his start? Like yeah I know he worked for a video store and with friends with DUI Manslaughter and they wrote scripts. But like how did he get started? What did he just send in a script? Did he blow a wienstien? Anyone know?
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Eat it, bitches
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I thought Q.T.'s thing was that he didn't go to film school? I thought he wrote True Romance and that was made before ResDogs, but I just checked and thats wrong.
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Wow. He really just made the ONLY comparison on earth that would make me excited for this film. Seriously, Disney's Robin Hood is the shit. One of my all-time favorites.
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and sold it, Tony Scott directed it the year after Dogs came out. If I'm not mistaken his original draft for Natural Born Killers was written before Dogs was made as well. I always heard QT never went to school- in fact he was quoted as saying, "I didn't go to fim school, I went to films" or something like that. But seriously how did he get from Birthday to Dogs? Always baffled me.
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I was fully prepared to despise this, since it's an animated Dreamworks movie not from Aardman, Production I.G, or Madhouse, and it's called KUNG FU PANDA. But The Word On The Street is shockingly, improbably good - mostly coming from people who not only expected to hate it, but were eagerly anticipating being able to hate it before the rest of us got a chance to do the same. Gonna be an interesting year for animated martial arts films starring cartoon animals; Hong Kong has the 2D animation WU-TANG MCDULL coming out as well. If it's up to the standards of the first and second McDull films, then unlike PANDA, it's safe to assume from the get-go that it'll be very, very good.
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"next year they’ll take on Roger Corman B-pictures with MONSTERS VS. ALIENS IN 3-D"
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Kung Fu Skunk?
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That song is wack as fuck. Dreamworks, you still have time to replace it with a nice slice of DeWolfe library music for that real Shaw Bros. flavor. Or silence. Or white noise. Or a Celine Dion/Kid Rock duet. Any fucking shit is better than "Kung Fu Fighting". Don't be such Weinsteins.
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SKUNK Fu.
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Mar 28, 2008 2:11:24 PM CDT
"The Departed is a 100% copycat of Infernal Affairs."
by harry weinstein
It should have been, but unfortunately it wasn't.
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So its a homage to other cgi, or kung fu films, and incredibly bloody? Come on. Kill Bill 2 is still a personal favorite of mine, the first one less so.
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Horton Hears a Who! Should be a review on this site because it was actually a good Seuss adaptation. The first thing I thought when I saw this was Kill Bill because the first site of the Jack Black panda is huffing and puffing as he gets up over the last step to the temple. The funny thing is everything I saw in the trailer I like EXCEPT for the panda. All the other characters were kind of cool. Of course there's the whole chopstick dueling/catch a fly thing that every martial arts movie seems to have now. I'll take WALL-E over this. That trailer was showing too. Yes, he looks like a complete Johnny Five ripoff, we all know that, but the story there seemed to have a depth that was lacking in the panda trailer.
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Compared to Pixar. Yes they both use very famous people to do their voice acting. But Dreamworks just goes out and hires the biggest name actors at the time. While Pixar gets actors who's voices and personality match their character perfectly. Yeah i know theres that whole thing that Shrek was origianlly going to have Chris Farly. But I bet even if he didn't die, the role would've gone to someone else because Farly was losing popularity before his death. But there is never any emotional depth to Dreamworks crap. And none of there CGI ever looks half as good as even Toy Story. But whatever you know Kung Fu Panda is going to rake in the cash. Can't wait for Kung Fu Panda 2!
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is everything it's cracked up to be. Luckily we had Brad Bird come through with THE INCREDIBLES and provide a basis of comparison for CGI films and also just provide a new film of real caliber for younger generations to grow up with. This reviewer seems to think another CG film has ascended into that atmosphere, let's hope this is true.
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If so, that was pretty good. Not Pixar level, but not bad and the first Schrek film was pretty good too.
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Dawn of the Dinosaurs in '09 I believe. This trailer with KFP, and WALL-E were also playing with Horton.
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Now there's a guy - no matter how much of a pisser he might be to work with - who gets the right voice no matter what. Would there be ANY situation on Earth in which Patton Oswalt would have played Remmy if Ratatouille had been done at Dreamworks? Ha! The part probably would have gone to some mush-mouth 20-something actor from Friday Night Lights.
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John Kricfalusi. Not saying Beck is a plant, but the only thing that could make him more independant is a huge fuck you attitude, and John K. has that in spades.
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Gets it done. It is that simple. Iron Giant...fantastic
Rattatouille was so different and rich. It is about 10 levels up from any other computer animated movie. I can see why some did not like it..we are so used to simple crappy animated junk. It was a masterful on every level.
KFP won't match up I am afraid. HIYA! -
plants are usually pretty easy to find by their use of industry phrases. This guy seems to make some points, and he does say some bad things about Jack Black, which a plant probably would not. A plant would probably say something more along the lines of "Jack Black is hilarious, but he also has the heart to put across the tender moments. This movie is a thrill ride from beginning to end!"
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I think I'll rent this one. My $10 is going to Pixar for Wall-E. I saw the Kung-Fu Panda trailer and there wasn't anything in it that I found funny. Every attempted gag and joke fell flat. I hope this is Dreamworks' turnaround movie. Maybe it is the start of something new for them, but I'm gonna take a cautious approach to this one. Dreamworks needs to realize that it isn't about the voice actors or how many pop culture references you can stuff into the film, it's about story and characters. I'm sure any one from Dreamworks would tell me that those two things have been their priority in all their films. Unfortunately, it doesn't show.
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Ice Age was done by Blue Sky Studios (http://www.blueskystudios.com). Dreamworks showed the same kind of potential with the first Shrek that matched the first Ice Age. They have a long way to go before they match that same caliber again.
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--completely self aware project by a writer/director that made a great movie almost 15 years ago (Pulp Fiction) and suddenly decided to tell the world how much he likes cheesy crap "cinema" by making... um... cheesy crap cinema like Kill Bill V1 and V2?? So since those projects were based on cheesy crappy cinema in the first place, film geeks can excuse the cheesy crap cinema he will continue to make or pay homage to as "fun" and "tongue in cheek" "old school" movie making. And to top it off, he and his buddy make "homage" to grind house cinema (i.e. cheap near home movies made for a few thousand dollars IF not) by spending $50 million to "recreate" that theater going experience (once they had THAT budget, all legitimacy went down the toilet).
Hey, I used to LOVE QT. But somewhere along the way he lost his storytelling abilities and became a self aware writer and director which is truly the kiss of death. QT, we don't care how much you like kung fu movies. We don't care how much you like 70s crap cinema. We don't care how much you know about any of that shit. Just tell a fucking story man. Kill Bill wasn't a story. It was a mish mash of "cool" one-liners and plot points, gelled together poorly by self aware visuals, references, and moments. Tell a damn story. You did it with True Romance, RD, and Pulp FOOL! Come on! Snap out of it. Wake up and smell the kung pao chicken. Perhaps that talk of being the "Scorsese" of this generation went to your head. You CAN pay homage to your favorites without damn near copying them . You did it with TR, RD, and Pulp. Learn from yourself. Thank GOD they didn't let you direct a James Bond movie. -
Might be a good movie, I just can't get past that effing title.
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If Kill Bill is the first time you wised up to the fact that Quentin fills his movies with parts of old shit that he idolizes, than you are an idiot. Although I readily admit that his last two movies had a lot of failed dialogue crammed into the mouth's of his actresses, if you have a problem with the action and kung fu bits, or the fundamental conceit of a film geek delivering the goods in movies with stories and cool plot points and tropes that serve a film that he would want to see, then you are going to the wrong movies. If you didn't know he was ripping off Scorcese when you thought he was the new Scorcese then that's your misunderstanding, WE know what we are going to see when we go to a QT movie even if you don't. And if you didn't like his cool one liners and gimmicks in his kung fu movie as much as you did in his gangster flick, his blaxploitation flick, or his homage to pulp stories than I can't image the problem is with Kill Bill as much as your hype following ass.
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with Jack Black telling everyone to silence their cell phones ruined this movie for me. He somehow in 20 seconds made me sick of the JB schtick that I've never felt before. I wish they could edit all of the "per wow wang geeer" noises Black has to shoehorn into every sentence he speaks.
He was pretty awesome in Margot at the Wedding. -
with Jack Black telling everyone to silence their cell phones ruined this movie for me. He somehow in 20 seconds made me sick of the JB schtick that I've never felt before. I wish they could edit all of the "per wow wang geeer" noises Black has to shoehorn into every sentence he speaks.
He was pretty awesome in Margot at the Wedding. -
Probably not.
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Back in the mid-eighties following the success of the first issue of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles comic book series there was a whole wave of imitators - an entirel black and white boom or quickly produced self published titles in general but a dozen or so specific TMNT parodies, starting with Adolescent Radioactive Black-belt Hamsters and ending with the best of them and the only one still published today, Usagi Yojimbo, the ronin rabbit. Now that's an animated HBO series waiting to happen.Anyway, most of them followed the three adjectives and a noun formula. So shouldn't this be "Twenty-something Genetically-enhanced Kung-Fu Panda"?Oh Jebus, the comics industry's "Black and White Boom" was over twenty years ago! I just keep getting older...
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I love the amount of wit in your comment. Anyways, I doubt he will get fucked in the ass by real pandas, because from what i hear pandas are not that fond of sex.
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To take something provocative and kind of ridiculous-sounding that I didn't EXPLICITLY explain, and title the fucking review with it! HERE is why Panda is like Kill Bill - Both films are heavily influenced by Hong Kong Cinema, to the point of almost being considered a member of the genre. BUT, at the same time, Kill Bill is every inch a Tarantino film, and KFP is every inch an animated film - and I DON'T mean they filled it with shitty references and jokes; I mean they used animation to make the characters do incredible, impossible physical feats beyond even Bruce Lee's grasp. In fact, there really aren't MANY jokes in the movie - those that are are mostly provided by Jack Black, and most of them feel distinctly out of place because the rest of this movie FEELS like a real Kung-Fu movie. If you dorks don't see it, it's seriously YOUR loss more than the studio's.
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By the way Nabster - no, there's no blood. BUT, there is a LOT of violence and a LOTALOT of fighting. There's no way in hell this thing's getting a G rating. Violence-wise, it's practically Reservoir Dogs by American PG-rated animation standards.
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I do actually like Mulan, but I think it would have been a much stronger movie without Eddie Murphy. Jack Black's performance here reminded me of Eddie Murphy in Mulan at times, but it's not quite as heinous in this case (his character is actually VITAL to the story here). The reason the trailers haven't quite shown the awesomeness yet is because the studio thinks the shoehorned comedy is what'll sell it. And I know, the title sucks - storywise, a better title would have been "The Dragon Warrior" or "Dragon Scroll" or "The Furious Five" but none of those titles hint that it's gonna involve a big clumsy fucking sexual harassment panda. And BTW, my name "NoodleDream" was inspired by a line in Kung Fu Panda spoken by Lo Pan himself, James Hong. I walked into this thing thinking "eh, at least it's free" and now I can't WAIT to plunk down 15-20 hard-earned dollars to see this thing in IMAX.
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You still think I'm a Dreamworks plant? Okay. NIGGER. There, could Dreamworks afford a lawsuit like that?
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That would have made a good title too - just "Po"
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Are you f*cking kidding me? That was the most subpar-choreographed, self-indulgent sh#t I have ever seen and most of you ate it like hot-cakes with butter and syrup which was really sh!tcakes. Ok, so not all of you.
BTW, does this mean half-way through the film, we get subjected to a sh!tty r3al-life cut of someone's backstory, too? -
celebrity voice-acting. It demeans the craft by hijacking the character by screaming "LOOK/LISTEN IT'S Me, X ACTOR/ACTRESS FROM HOLLYWOOD!!!!!" Once that is in my head,the magic is tainted.
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It's going to be awesome. I love the trailer. They move so perfect, like real.
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