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Details Of CRANK Sequel Hit The Nets!!

Published at:  Mar 25, 2008 9:21:18 AM CDT


Merrick here...


Some SPOILERish details about the sequel to CRANK have been posted by spoilerTV. This includes a breakdown of characters and their relation to stuff that happens in the movie.

Shamefully, I haven't seen the first CRANK...every time I try to watch it, some kind of distraction happens. I have it in my Netflix que, though, so one way or another I'm gonna see the damn thing.

CLICK HERE FOR DETAILS!!!








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    Readers Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 9:22:18 AM CDT

    Electric Company?

    by arcadiands

    that old guy always made me laugh

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 9:22:38 AM CDT

    Seriously

    by bombadils_bane10

    Crank 2: Crankier?

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 9:22:55 AM CDT

    More Chinese Market Sex!

    by akutz

    'Nuff said.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 9:23:27 AM CDT

    Crank 2: Cruise Control

    by nomoredirtyjokespleaseweareyanks

    it'll star Jason Patric and things will slow wayyyyy the fuck down.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 9:31:02 AM CDT

    Crank 2 Sounds Better than Crank 1

    by kevinwillis.net

    Because it fully embraces its own stupidity, rather than half-heartedly embracing it, the way they did in the first Crank. Go, Jason!

    Reply to Talkback

  • Sounds like you HAVE seen it. That's just the style of the movie. It was designed for hyperactive kids in the middle of a 7 day pixie stick binge.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 9:36:59 AM CDT

    Crank rules

    by series7

    Awesome movie. Jason is the only action star (thats not from Asia) working today. Even though Crank was all jittery and quick cut, that was the point of the movie. Not to hide the actors inablity to fight... like Shoot'em up. They should make Bob Hoskins the main bad guy in this movie. In fact lets all pretend that WAR never happened, set this as a prequel to Danny the Dog. And have Jet Li's and Bob Hoskins character out to get Chev Chelios. Whatever I will see this movie.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 9:40:02 AM CDT

    So can someone explain to me

    by arcadiands

    what the deal was with how it was filmed? Did they use some kind of high speed camera and then when the movie is played regular speed, it looks like its... i dunno... just off somehow. Like, they were in a pool talking normal but the ripples in the pool were going at high speed. Can anyone tell me what was whacky about this film?

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 9:43:51 AM CDT

    crank 2 sounds awesome

    by bowtiehoon

    I was pretty drunk when i saw crank 1, the only thing i remember was that sex scene out of nowhere...LOL

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 9:45:52 AM CDT

    ONly saw one scene on cable,

    by ingloriousjedi

    where they have that point of view from within the microwave. That was enough for me to know how shit the director was. The fact that they cut back to the P.o.v mircrowave shot when the girlfriend walked to open the door was a good indicator of a poorly made film. Although the sequal could be cool if they call it Crank 2: Double the Crank, and have Soldier Boys 'Crank Dat' playing during the opening suequence where that douche Jason Statham will be fucking some blonde before being interupted by Gang members who want to fight. (When the fighting start, the crank dat song gets even louder)

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 9:46:34 AM CDT

    WILL IT BE CRANK 2: CRANK IT 2 THE STREETS?

    by pennsy

  • Mar 25, 2008 9:54:13 AM CDT

    Vern, I know where you are coming from, but...

    by derlanghaarige

    ...I think visually it's more enjoyable than Oscar winner "The Bourne Ultimatum". Mostly because the whole movie was designed to be some kind of hyperactive bullshit and I gotta say, it delivers! Seriously, I can forgive an actionmovie (or any movie) that "stylish" kind of filming and editing, as long as it's part of the whole concept, all way down to the script, and not just an attempt to look cool in the eyes of the YouTube generation. But I won't judge anybody for hating Crank. Basically it's an experiment and like with every experiment in movie making, everybodies opinion is right.
    That been said: Damn, Crank 2 sounds seriously fucked up. Let'S see how this turns out.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 10:02:32 AM CDT

    crank is fantastic

    by bluelou_boyle

    I thought it's the sort of thing you might enjoy, Vern. It's certainly way better than most of Seagal's output.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 10:04:16 AM CDT

    Crank: The Golden Age

    by they call it the dip

    I like how one character in the casting call says "Must Be Ok With Nudity" and she's one scene in a taxi cab. CLASSY!

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 10:04:20 AM CDT

    Crank is one of the 10 best of the decade.

    by blue1622

    not kidding...and news on Dexter season 3 up at veidt.com

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 10:09:08 AM CDT

    They should put Jason Statham, Vin Diesel

    by they call it the dip

    ... Vinnie Jones, Michael Madsen, and Ving Rhames in a movie called "Wasted Talent" where they sit in a circle of fold-out chairs and cry about their soiled careers while wiping the tear-drops away with 100 dollar bills.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 10:15:23 AM CDT

    2 CRANKY, 2 FURIOUSLY.

    by pennsy

  • Mar 25, 2008 10:36:11 AM CDT

    Mr. McPoops

    by they call it the dip

    I'm glad somebody appreciates my desired portion of gib.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 10:37:00 AM CDT

    It was a live action Roadrunner cartoon...

    by bill clay

    When a guy falls a mile to the ground out of a helicopter and still survives for the sequel, the suspension of disbelief meter overheats to the point of melting.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 10:38:52 AM CDT

    Shoot Em Up was better

    by slone13

    As long as we're talking live action cartoons.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 10:42:45 AM CDT

    One of the worst movies EVER

    by acappellaman

    I watched this just a couple months ago, and was stunned with how stupid it was. Yeah, the girl was hot and all, but come on. The movie was ridiculous!

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 10:47:02 AM CDT

    Crank it up - best movie of last yeat

    by masteryoda007

    Crank was the most fun I've had at the cinema since watching Superman III back in the summer '83!
    I cannot believe that a movie critic has not seen it yet. I thought that they would have their finger on the pulse.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 10:49:57 AM CDT

    Crank was way better than Shoot 'Em Up

    by spandau belly

    Shoot 'Em Up was probably the biggest disappointment I saw last year. Crank went all the way with its crass humour and absurdist plot and poor film making, Shoot 'Em Up just kinda decided what brand of ridiculousness it was selling.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 10:51:18 AM CDT

    this time they've got to drop him from the space station

    by spandau belly

    and then have him come back again for Crank 3!

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 10:51:32 AM CDT

    What's the matter with you people?

    by kolchak

    Does no one appreciate camp anymore? It's not fucking citizen Kane.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 10:58:03 AM CDT

    RE: Acappellaman

    by datascream

    That's the point. It IS ridiculous, it's not a movie your supposed to take seriously. Unfortunately it seems there are a lot of people on here that never go to watch movies for fun anymore. It's actually very sad...

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 10:59:13 AM CDT

    Crank 'Em Up

    by hawaiian organ donor

    As Harold would say, Crank and Shoot "Em Up were blissfully retarded. Both were the most fun I've had watching movies in a while. Talk about a great double feature. That said, the premise to Crank 2 sounds like garbage.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 11:01:56 AM CDT

    Oh goody.

    by docpazuzu

    Another excuse for BringingSexyBack and his army of spamming cretins to take over and strangle this talkback with fake titles.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 11:09:09 AM CDT

    IngloriousJedi

    by thecontinentalop

    I hate to break it to you, but, in context, the microwave shot had a point. It wasn't just showing off. In the movie, Statham will die if he doesn't keep his adrenaline up, so for comedic purposes, they show his doing the most boring thing imaginable: programming the clock on a microwave. You would have gotten this joke if you had bothered to watch more than a minute of the movie before jumping to conclusions. It's like tuning in halfway through Psycho and deciding that Hitchcock was a shitty director because of that "completely unnecessary" shot of the newspaper.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 11:13:23 AM CDT

    CRANK was fun.

    by jonquixote

    Not super fun, but fun. Affable and a little different. And it was better than SHOOT EM UP. Similar ideas, I guess, about playing up and over-the-top with an action movie. But CRANK had more imagination and a sense of humor. SHOOT EM UP just had up and over the top, and ran out of ideas about halfway through. I watched CRANK pretty much on a dare, and it's a nice, pleasant & violent surprise.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 11:15:15 AM CDT

    "one of the 10 best of the decade"

    by chewyou812

    I think Ron Burgundy said it best, "That doesn't make sense."

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 11:15:22 AM CDT

    Datascream

    by acappellaman

    I get it. I know camp when I see it, and I love it when it's done well. It wasn't done well in Crank. Half of the reason I hated it was the editing. I totally get that they were trying to get a frenetic feel to it, but I don't think it was done well.

    Camp movies that I enjoy: Army of Darkness, Lake Placid, Last Action Hero (TOTALLY underrated movie - most people hated it for the same reason you're saying I hated Crank - they just didn't 'get' what they were trying to do). The list goes on. I do like camp. It's just hard to pull off successfully. Crank didn't do it for me.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 11:16:57 AM CDT

    In the sequel, jason statham fucks his girlfriend

    by stovetopstuffin'

    while having a dude finger his asshole, and shooting up on heroin, in front of an audience of underaged brazillian kids at school who give him a standing ovation at the end. Did anyone else find the public fucking scene very disturbing. I likes me some dirty porn, but the crowd just standing there and the schoolbus full of kids watching was too much. The applauding at the end was the icing on the shit cake. Might have worked if they were in the red light district of amsterdam, but Chinatown?

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 11:20:37 AM CDT

    Shoot 'Em Up was awful.

    by docpazuzu

    The Transporter flicks are gloriously and unapologetically retarded, but Shoot 'Em Up was merely pretending to be retarded. It was a smug, winking, insulting craptacular.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 11:20:45 AM CDT

    TheContinentalOp

    by ingloriousjedi

    The fact that it was a boring task has nothing to do with the lame choice of shot. And I was also referencing the fact that they kept cutting back to this shot, as if they hadn't filmed enough footage from different angles on the day.

    And if it was meant to convey a sence of slow moving bordem, this would have been better acheived with a normal midshot OUTSIDE of the microwave, that stayed on the same shot for a long period of time without cuttng to any close shot of the microwave numbers. Then the audience would also feel the bordem with the character. Poorly directed. I'm pretty sure they should put some aids jokes in Crank 2. Actually im HIV positive.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 11:22:07 AM CDT

    craptacular...

    by docpazuzu

    ...of a film, it should have read.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 11:23:42 AM CDT

    Last Action Hero?

    by hawaiian organ donor

    It wasn't a bad movie because of the camp, in fact, that was the best part of the movie. As soon as they crossed into the real world and it became serious, it became a different movie and failed miserably. The first half of the movie is a riot though. The dog pyramid? Classic.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 11:26:08 AM CDT

    Is that fucking CHELIOS?

    by spud mcspud

    I gotta be the motherfucking Shakespeare of sick!!!

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 11:27:06 AM CDT

    To paraphrase Bill Duke:

    by christopher3

    There's just one thing I don't understand about "Crank." The thing I don't understand is every fucking thing that was on the screen.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 11:27:54 AM CDT

    masteryoda007

    by redd

    "Crank was the most fun I've had at the cinema since watching Superman III back in the summer '83! I cannot believe that a movie critic has not seen it yet. I thought that they would have their finger on the pulse."

    Wow, I guess you haven't watched too many movies in the last 25 years?

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 11:33:37 AM CDT

    Crank 2: Still Crankin'

    by bigdogg

    I've been meaning to see the first one as well. I'll probably just wait till the super ultra mega deluxe edition of the 1st DVD comes out right before the second one featuring 1 whole brand new featurette

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 11:33:49 AM CDT

    And when Jason Statham's in his late 50's...

    by kid z

    ...Live Free or Crank Hard!

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 11:33:54 AM CDT

    Crank was...

    by phimseto

    ...one of my top movie experiences ever. We all chugged a couple of energy drinks before the film, with a promise to chug a third in the theatre whenever Chev drank his first one.

    It was a Tuesday night showing, so it the group of us and some casual movie goers. By early in the film, though, it became the closest thing I've seen to a "Rocky Horror Picture Show" viewing. A great time was had by all.

    I think the high point had to be when the parakeet got it.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 11:34:10 AM CDT

    IngloriousJedi

    by thecontinentalop

    Imagine that you're on of the two directors of Crank. You have to film Jason Statham programming a microwave. You are in a very cramped kitchenette, not a set, which has removable walls to facilitate camera placement. You need to see Statham's facial expressions in order to sell the fact that the poison in his veins is catching up with him, so you can't shoot it from the side. So what do you do? You very economically place your tiny hi-def camera inside the microwave, get your coverage, and to emphasize the disorientation he felt, you get some blurry shots of the numbers on the microwave. Then you move on. Maybe it wasn't what you would have done (and I sympathize with you about unnecessary "cam" shots. Ever see any of Scott "From Dusk Till Dawn 2" Speigel's work? He has a shot from inside an oscillating desk fan for no reason at all.) but I think it was warranted in Crank. I'm not saying it's a great piece of directing, but I do think it shows more craft and precision than most of these "sugar high" movies.

    On a real note, I'm sorry to hear about your condition.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 11:37:06 AM CDT

    CRANK 2: JERK IT

    by future help

    CHOKIN' DA' CHICKEN

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 11:40:27 AM CDT

    Also...

    by phimseto

    ...in defense of "Shoot 'Em Up", the movie plays way better in subsequent viewings. It's only misstep, and it is admittedly near-fatal, is when it goes off on a completely serious anti-gun tirade late in the game. If you're going to go over the top, you can't ground your film with any kind of real-world monologue (with the added irony of their being on a plane at the time). It reminded me of the film "Brassed Off", whose story really portrayed the struggle of coal-mining communities but wasn't content to let its tale do its talking. Like 90% into the film, a character goes off into this anti-Tory tirade that sums up the film's values nicely but to say it breaks the fourth wall is to put it mildly.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 11:43:44 AM CDT

    shoot em up was better

    by lex romero

    For a 'non stop action film' crank had little action scenes, just lots ofrunning about. At least shootemup put some effort into some stylish gunfights.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 11:54:01 AM CDT

    Crank 2: All That Crank

    by aquatarkusman

    Featuring the ghost of Roy Scheider as a hepped-up-on-goofballs Bob Fosse.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 12:04:16 PM CDT

    Crank was so much better then Poop'em Up

    by series7

    I fucking love fun dumb movies. But I was almost falling asleep during Shoot'em Up. First off the movie was like barley an R, Crank was a hard R. Also Clive Owen is not believable as some bad ass ex-military gun dude. He lacks any carisma in the movie, just mumbled his lines and made poses and had that same Alan Rickman look on his face the whole time (but with out Rickman's wit). At least Jason Statham fucking looks like he gets into it. That and he actually looks pissed off, Clive Owen just looks like someone is bothering him by talking to loud in a library and he is trying to read. That and Jason could kick Clives ass up and down the street. Shoot'em sucked because it was trying to hard to be a zanier version of Transporter. Crank works because it goes the extra mile and never slowed down. Also do I even need to explain who bad the casting of Paul Giamatti was?

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 12:04:22 PM CDT

    Crank 'em up - Jason Vs. Owen

    by david cloverfield

    I would pay good money for that. The two buggers showing up on opposite sides.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 12:05:17 PM CDT

    CRANK DAT SOULJA BOY

    by turketron

    YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 12:09:18 PM CDT

    Merrick, your experience trying to watch Crank...

    by archive

    ...sounds exactly like the actual experience of finishing it. Every time I tried to watch a movie, somehting distracting happened!

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 12:12:19 PM CDT

    Ha!

    by archive

    Didn't see you there, Vern! Respect.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 12:24:22 PM CDT

    Battery powered ticker???

    by blacknoi

    >> Chev Chelios faces a Chinese mobster who has stolen his nearly indestructible heart and replaced it with a battery-powered ticker that requires regular jolts of electricity to keep working.
    Seriously? How contrived can you get?

    Don't get me wrong, I absolutly LOVED the first Crank. So much so, I found the custom-Nokia-ish Ringtone and have that on my phone. But this battery powered heart sounds very iffy. I'll still be there with bells on when it comes out, but I hope its better than it sounds.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 12:25:37 PM CDT

    I liked both but liked shot em up more

    by postalpez

    might be because there wasn't an unneeded rape.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 12:27:11 PM CDT

    take 2....

    by blacknoi

    "Chev Chelios faces a Chinese mobster who has stolen his nearly indestructible heart and replaced it with a battery-powered ticker that requires regular jolts of electricity to keep working."
    I first learned not to use double brackets in talkbacks.. or you get truncated.
    So a battery powered heart??? Talk about contrived. I mean I loved the first Crank movie for what it was. Almost zero plot, but fantastic non-stop action. I get it. I even have the nokia-ish rington for use with my own cell phone.
    I will still be there opening day, but I hope the plot is better in execution that what it sounds like on paper. They replaced his heart, really???

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 12:28:24 PM CDT

    TheContinentalOp

    by lucky slevin

  • Mar 25, 2008 1:01:14 PM CDT

    Slevin

    by thecontinentalop

    Thanks, man.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 1:18:50 PM CDT

    I don't think anyone will argue...

    by they call it the dip

    ... that Clive Owen is the better actor. Although unlike Statham, Owen actually does great movies along with his paycheck schlock.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 1:19:57 PM CDT

    I DON'T THINK ANYONE WILL ARGUE

    by they call it the dip

    which one is better actor... meaning Clive Owen is a way better actor. Sorry. I didn't like how I worded that.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 1:20:01 PM CDT

    Peanut Butter Crank = Shitty Meth

    by baron karza

    From what I remember of Eugene Oregon.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 1:43:50 PM CDT

    I want MAN-BEAR-PIG: THE MOVIE

    by random dude

  • Mar 25, 2008 2:04:42 PM CDT

    Crank 2 : Electric Boogaluu

    by picardsucks

  • Mar 25, 2008 2:07:33 PM CDT

    CRANK was poo

    by laudnergomez

    Style without brains, excess without aim.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 2:16:42 PM CDT

    How about...Crank Shaft!

    by zino

    Jason Statham teams up with Samuel L Jackson. Possibly set in Africa.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 2:22:20 PM CDT

    THE SHAWCRANK REDEMPTION

    by arcadiands

    Some birds were never meant to be locked up in cages.
    take parakeets, for example.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 2:26:50 PM CDT

    C2: Turn My Crank or Yank My Crank

    by plasmaorb

    The plot seems kinda stupid... i dont know..
    Crank2: Crank Yankers and Jason and the cast can all be puppets

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 2:32:05 PM CDT

    Sequels, Equals, Prequels and fucking remakes.

    by the gospel according to bastardface

    Blah. Saw this on the Redissue forums, 38 Remakes Planned this year: http://tinyurl.com/2gxn6x

    What a fucking joke.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 2:34:38 PM CDT

    You know, not every movie out there needs to make you think.

    by reel american hero


    It is quite possible to just have fun with a movie, unless you're here at aint it intellectual film news.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 2:37:58 PM CDT

    CRANK was fun and entertaining dammit!

    by mike_d

    I bought it on dvd.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 2:46:41 PM CDT

    Awww, HELL NO!! Enough already!

    by motoko kusanagi

    The first one was crappy enough, so why make a sequel?

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 2:46:58 PM CDT

    King Kong Lives!

    by i dunno

    The main guy dies at the end but Wait ! They replace his heart with a mechanical one and the mediocrity continues!

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 2:54:50 PM CDT

    Your bets on who will play the 100 yr old Chinese mob boss

    by i dunno

    "Lo Pan" (or guy from Chinese restaurant in Seinfeld) or "Uncle Benny" from Lethal Weapon 4. I vote Lo Pan.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 2:56:50 PM CDT

    wrong Kong movie, gotham_night

    by i dunno

    I was talking about the 1970's remake. There was literally a sequel where they gave him a mechanical heart. Sarah Connor (the original) briefly got topless.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 3:43:42 PM CDT

    Vern on point as always

    by gwai lo

    "It was designed for hyperactive kids in the middle of a 7 day pixie stick binge." thank you, thank you. I get the retarded part, just not the blissful. Both Crank and Shoot em Up get on my nerves because not only are they awful films devoid of compelling story or character (Crank manages a passable concept but applies neither story or character to it), the action/effects/comic relief are all extremely inept as well. I don't get people that complain about shaky cam in Bourne or Batman but then praise Crank for it's seizure inducing editing. I know all about so bad it's good, these aren't that. don't try and tell me its "fun", it's a waste of fucking time.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 4:38:44 PM CDT

    Phimseto, you're the reason...

    by acappellaman

    ...theaters put warnings on their screens to NOT TALK DURING MOVIES. I'm sure you and your caffeine & sugar-infused friends had a blast watching Crank and getting loud and obnoxious. I wonder if you noticed the people around you glaring at you idiots as they left the theater. People like you are the ones who make the movie-going experience a gamble. Sometimes you get an audience who's responsive, yet respectful to the people around them, and sometimes you get a row of imbeciles who think it's hilarious to yell at the movie every five minutes.

    And no, I'm not a prude who wants complete silence during movies. I want people to laugh and scream as long as it's done without the intention to disrupt everybody else. By all means, cheer during Rocky, scream during Nightmare on Elm Street, laugh out loud at Will Farrell acting like a child, but don't be distracting! It's annoying as hell!

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 4:41:16 PM CDT

    crank was awesome

    by jccalhoun

    crank was a great movie. Plot and characterization are overrated.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 4:53:06 PM CDT

    WILL CRANK FEATURE THE KNIGHT INDUSTRIES 2000?

    by pennsy

  • Mar 25, 2008 4:58:18 PM CDT

    Ah, acappellaman

    by phimseto

    You are trying to provide a good service, and I commend you. I feel just as you do, but "Crank" warranted special treatment. We didn't start out completely out of control (even with the Red Bull coursing through our veins like a Beijing Cocktail). It was actually the reactions of the other people getting in on our act that elevated it. We (and by "we" I mean everyone who saw the film, not just my friends) agreed that the film was that much more enjoyable for the repartee. 99.9% of the time, I'm with you on theatre etiquette. Crank qualifies as a very well-deserved .1% percent.

    I also don't think movie-going is that much of a gamble. It's more of a situational science. For example, if you go to see "Horton Hears a Who" at 12pm on weekend, you probably will not be getting an optimal movie going experience. Unless kids yelling and scream and roving like tiny madmen sounds as "optimal" to you. Yeah, you'll beat the odds in a bad way from time to time, but more often than not if you know the movie, know its fanbase, and plan accordingly, you don't run into too many problems.

    As Jimmy Malone would say, "Here endeth the lesson."

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 5:00:42 PM CDT

    It's not bad.

    by fiester

    I found it entertaining enough and liked the hyperstylized treatment--it melded well with the idea of a character that needs to keep his adrenalin maxed out constantly or else he would die. Plus you get to see Amy Smart get bent over a newstand and banged hard while hundreds of Chinese watch and cheer--and there's nothing wrong with that!

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 5:06:28 PM CDT

    I would have liked it if I didn't know anythign going in

    by crayon

    Unfortunately, knowing the premise beforehand I was all hyped up for a semi-serious dark action/thriller movie with some manly hitman who doesn't give a fuck, and was bracing for maximum ass kicking. Instead I just got some kinda cartoon with a goofy hitman fucking a girl in chinatown.

    Normally, that would be enough to sell me. But expectations exceeded what it delivered, and I just can't shake how great it could have been if it played it a little more straight.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 5:29:11 PM CDT

    Ah, Phimseto

    by acappellaman

    You debate like a champion (and react to being called a moron, an idiot, obnoxious, and a variety of other not-so-complimentary words with amazing maturity). Duly noted. Considering I despised Crank, I'll give you the all clear to Rocky Horror-ize the hell out of it, as long as Leonard Maltin isn't in the audience trying to view it for a review. I suppose it may have been one of those 'you had to be there' moments.

    I accept your apology.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 5:41:34 PM CDT

    Chia-head Shia as Chev Jr.

    by wyatt wingfoot

    Just chave chis chead and away we go for 80 minutes of adrenaline filled-action!

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 5:42:49 PM CDT

    CRANKENSTEIN CONQUERS THE WORLD!

    by wyatt wingfoot

    "Crankenstein's heart will live on forever." Toho should sue.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 6:01:44 PM CDT

    Wank 2

    by knuckleduster

    Or: how to fuck your career in the ass in front of a cheering crowd.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 6:15:12 PM CDT

    real action

    by stuntgirl.com

    That really was Jason, a couple hundred feet above L.A. in that helicopter. There was so much authenticity in the filming and action sequences.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 6:38:53 PM CDT

    Shoot em up is what Crank wanted to be.

    by zombieslayer

    That's all I'm sayin. Cept the part where i pointed out that that was all i wanted to say, followed by this explanation.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 7:13:28 PM CDT

    Crank 1 was a hoot!

    by filmfunk

    Shoot Em Up was embarassing shit and tried sooo hard to be like Crank but failed with a red face and a carrot up it's arse!

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 7:47:40 PM CDT

    The only good part in Crank

    by darquelyte

    Was when the word "cunt" flashed on his forehead.
    I like Jason and I had wanted to like this movie.
    But it was bad.
    Really, really bad.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 8:39:23 PM CDT

    Fish Halman.

    by otm shank

    Anybody who lives in Southern California and watches the 10 o'clock news will know who that character is a tribute to.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 8:55:51 PM CDT

    So no broken back, brain swelling, dislodged organs, etc.

    by kongmonkey

    Just an invincible bloke of a psychopath whose only flaw is no adrenaline and a bad heart, that despite being bad, just won't stop ticking. I"LL BUY THAT FOR A DOLLAR!

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 9:06:20 PM CDT

    CRANK 12: CRANK IT LONG TIME

    by kingoflight

    Great film !

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 10:12:47 PM CDT

    CRANK 2: THE RISE OF J. ARTHUR CRANK

    by mrmysteryguest

    Electric Company, baybeeeee!

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 10:15:23 PM CDT

    CRANK 3: YANK MY CRANK, BABY!

    by mrmysteryguest

  • Mar 25, 2008 10:30:39 PM CDT

    I liked Crank well enough...

    by 23greatwoundsallgotinbattle

    ...but...(SPOILER)

    He died at the end, didn't he? How the fuck is there a sequel? The link on the page leads to a big blank nothing.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 10:41:55 PM CDT

    My 2 Cents

    by the real mirajeff

    I saw Crank last week on cable and to me, it was far superior to Shoot 'Em Up, which was a miserable film. Crank was actually fun. I'd resisted seeing it for so long precisely because I thought it looked retarded but I was surprised by how entertaining it was. Shoot 'Em Up was a tedious cartoon. That is all.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 25, 2008 10:57:50 PM CDT

    I CRANK YOUR MILKSHAKE!

    by osmosis jones

    I CRANK IT UP!

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 26, 2008 12:15:44 AM CDT

    gotham knight

    by slkboxrman

    whats that sound ? ur testicles drying up and falling off from no use.. CRANK was amazingly ludicrous but it was fun.. CRANK 2 sounds like it will be the same.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 26, 2008 9:25:40 AM CDT

    First time I saw Crank, I was distracted as well.

    by hiperaktiv

    20 minutes in I took the pants off my gf and ate her out. It's true man.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 26, 2008 9:55:57 AM CDT

    And by GF

    by norrinrad

    I presume you mean "grapefruit." Why it would have pants is beyond me.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 26, 2008 10:33:07 AM CDT

    norrinrad

    by docpazuzu

    Well played, sir.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 26, 2008 10:54:19 AM CDT

    PUNISHMENT: WELCOME BACK, CRANK

    by spud mcspud

    Now bring The Russian into it. And maybe Barracuda, too.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 26, 2008 10:56:33 AM CDT

    CRANK was great. SHOOT ME UP, not so much.

    by spud mcspud

    The bit where Clive Owen shot the kids' roundabout - AND IT FUCKING SPUN -that was a stretch too far. That film had zero fucking clue about the physics of ballistics a5t that point. It was a move too far.

    CRANK, on the other hand, has no such limits. It creates its hyper-real world, introduces its rules (or lack thereof) and sticks to them. It's fucking awesome.

    We demand CRANK 2: WELCOME BACK CRANK! Make it NOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWW!!!

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 26, 2008 10:58:00 AM CDT

    TheRealMirajeff - bang on!

    by spud mcspud

    Damn right.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Mar 26, 2008 11:44:20 AM CDT

    ON GOLDEN CRANK

    by stuntcock mike

  • Mar 26, 2008 2:51:07 PM CDT

    Crank was the movie Shoot 'Em Up desperately wanted to be.

    by fist dirtbox

    It wasn't great by any standards, but it was damn good fun. SEU was just trying waaaay too hard - You can't manufacture a 'cult' movie. Its self-awareness of its own irreverence weighed it down like a leg-iron.

    Reply to Talkback

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