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Harry wishes he'd missed seeing THE OTHER BOLEYN GIRL...
I’ve been looking forward to seeing THE OTHER BOLEYN GIRL. I’m a fan of the these sorts of films and the cast… well who doesn’t love and adore Natalie Portman and Scarlett Johansson… I like Jim Sturgess – and Eric Bana can be great, but he’s an actor that needs solid direction to deliver.
Well, what I wasn’t expecting was for the film to be completely and utterly mediocre. Throughout the film the style of the director annoyed the fuck out of me. You can tell that it was shot by a first time director that comes from TV directly. However, I couldn’t believe how clumsy it was. There’s points where I swear to God – you missed the commercials – because the next shot revealed felt completely disconnected to the scene before it.
The sets felt empty, it’s like they arrived on their locations and just shot without prepping the locale. The photography in the outdoor scenes felt video – with over-exposed skies – and I swear to God – sometimes, completely out of place time-lapse CLOUD FORMATIONS – which felt completely and utterly out of place.
The shot framing was awkward – and all the actors’ performances were all over the place. Like the director had no idea who these characters were and how to keep the actors on track. Also… this is a film about a period where advancement and ambition could be had through the whoring out of your daughters – to curry favor with the King of England played by Eric Bana. The film is about as sexy as jacking with a crusty dirty sock. The sensuality is dead. And the film has the cast to be sexy – it just has no idea how to create the situations.
What’s good?
Well the story – based on Philippa Gregory is solid. In fact it’s a great story – Peter Morgan’s script is compelling – if only ineptly translated to the screen. I found myself getting angry at the direction from Justin Chadwick – because the material was as compelling as ELIZABETH, buuuuuuut, robbed of the suspense, the romance, the sensuality, the intrigue and the subtlety.
All those elements are present in the material – but delivered like a phone book dropped on your front porch. The film moves like molasses in January. You can’t imagine how dull and inept this film is. It’s sad because Scarlett and Natalie aren’t that bad. But poor Eric Bana is horrifyingly awful as Henry Tudor. His look was completely wrong visually – Henry is famously painted – and there was no attempt in hair or make-up to come close – that said – costumes were handled nice, but it’s so ugly through the lens… This is the cinematographer’s first feature – and it’s obvious he has a long way to go before successfully transitioning from TV episodes – to film.
Over all… it’s just a waste of time and acting talent. If you do go see it – know that you’ll like the story – but probably feel it all falls flat and awkard. A great story, terribly told. So sad. I really wanted this movie to be great. Dammit. If this review comes across half-hearted and dispassionate – it’s a true reflection of the film I saw.
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On my first post ever... sweeeeeet.
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and still shine!
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I saw this film back in October. It was admittedly a rough cut but it was still a complete mess. Then for months I've seen several positive reviews pop up on the site. Nice to know that I'm not crazy.
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you decide then and there you're gonna hate this movie. I loathe that style of reviewing films. You do this all the time! I'm not your friend anymore! Okay I still am. I love you Harry. We may not agree all the time, but we're geeks at heart and should really be there for each other. Yes at all times.
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Of been released during Oscar consideration time.Not Febuary like all the rest of the trash.
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... if Harry says it's shit, it's gotta be shit, right?
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The only way it could be worse would be if they stuck a "-ing" in front. Like "Betraying Mary" or "Forgetting Anne" or "Being Henry" or some shit like that. But "The Other Boleyn Girl" might even be worse than that. Either way it's a garbage title.
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you mean there's no scene where they at least kiss?
damn. -
The film is a washed up whale. Everyone that was at the screening that I talked to disliked it. It was just flat, over-acted and lame.
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And how in the merry blue hell could Chadwick screw this up! Portman, Johannsen and Bana!?! My god, that's just sex right there. Even if they went down the Carry On Henry route (all heaving bosoms and quadruple entendres) it would have to be better than this bland-o-rama. At least Sid James and a more passing resemblence to the King. Oh and I hope they don't play 'Greensleves' in the film, I overdosed on that damn music at school!
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... for movies starring Johanssen and Portman as horny sisters.
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It never did look good anyway and I'm still not crazy about Portman's acting. She's really not that good of an actress anymore. Her lines always seem forced. It's almost like she delivers a line, then winks at us, wasn't that awesome? She was a more natural actress in her younger years. Aw well Natalieportman.com is not gonna like this one bit, no siree bob.
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for shit period dramas. really I've had enough. someone make a good one for a change! I know it can be done, i've seen them many times before.
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Feb 22, 2008 2:40:22 AM CST
I don't generally give a fuck when they cast American's as brits
by lost jarv
but that utter talent Vacuum Portman? Scarlett Johanssen is one thing, she can do it- but fucking Padme? Mind you, this always looked like dull Oscar bait so I'm hardly surprised.
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Aren't Queens supposed to get nude?
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Is the animation of that avatar of Lawrence riding a camel, or of the scene where he's being raped by the Turks?
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What the fuck are you talking about?
Go see the movie "Chopper", it'll blow your ginger pubes off -
I'm still not convinced Portman is a good actor. Am I the only one who has seen Star Wars? Seriously. V for Vendetta was the exception, not the rule.
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Why do they only make films about Henry VIII? Never the far cooler - cinematically -war mongering Plantagenet Kings? Odd, really.
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scenes are blown out - very video looking - no texture - there's no sense of scope, majesty or sense of the regal nature of this type of story. Other than filming in great locations, terribly lit - and shot... and very "nice" costumes... all edited to flow like the end of a piss. What a wasted opportunity. Natalie and Scarlett do a decent job - but often times you can feel the director coaching them to go "more obvious" and it's just bad direction.
Eric Bana's slavish devotion to his cock's desires is laughably handled. Portman's seduction isn't handled particularly well. And often times - what you want to be watching is off camera (not talking about sex - the film is PG-13 - so that's not here) - what I'm talking about are events that are talky talky to us - instead of shown. The exposition sometimes is unbearable. -
Was pretty good as I remember. I suggest you all find that on DVD instead!
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Actually in his younger days he was quite the athelete and excelled in archery and jousting. He was also very tall for the times making him an imposing figure It was only after a riding accident that he became the bloated figure that is seen in latter portraits. So Bana is probably OK without all the makeup or padding.
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"Poor Eric Bana is horrifyingly awful". I refuse to believe that could ever possibly be true. Anyway, this is just Harry bowing down to pressure to finally give a negative review. Bit sad, really, since I had his POTC: AWE review framed because he had the balls to go against the conformity of popular opinion. Here, however, we have a comic-book geek saying he didn't enjoy a period costume drama. Which is a bit like a neo-nazi saying they didn't enjoy Schindler's List, really.
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theres all sorts of things you could film them doing to get most of us to watch.
although, none of that will be in this film -
...You didn't expect this to be totally and utterly Mediocre? Did you not see the creative people making this movie? Did you not read what it was about? Did you not see any of the trailers or promotional material or advance word? Man, take the blinkers off once in awhile.
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I doubt that there will ever be a good film about Henry VIII. Since the protagonist is a thoroughly unlikeable cad, it doesn't make for compelling viewing. He basically has no redeeming features.
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What sort of films are you not a fan of then?( this is an actual question)
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I think the difference between you and me was that I went into this film thinking it would suck. I hate period pieces, I liked the story and enjoyed the film. You went in with expectations it would be good and it clearly fell flat.
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Feb 22, 2008 6:38:51 AM CST
completely out of place time-lapse CLOUD FORMATIONS – which felt
by internet thug
Fucking line of the year harold,,keep up the excellent work
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Or for that matter, the TV show the Tudors? It's the exact same subject matter. Not that those were terribly accurate, but then this probably isn't either. Harry, you kind of lambast TV again, I would say unfairly, as if that medium is what produces these bad directors. So by comparison, would you say the Tudors series is more cinematic? Cause if it's only as good as that show, then I would call it functional. If I remember Anne of a Thousand Days, it was not terribly cinematic either by today's standards (or then actually), though it did let it's actors shine which may be more than this does. Just want to put it in perspective. If I enjoyed the Elizabeth R series with Glenda Jackson but hated The Golden Age, am I possibly going to like The Other Bolyen Girl?
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Harry what did you think of the Indy trailer? I don't recall you posting anything about it at all... what gives? It's fucking indiana jones. We're getting a fucking Indiana Jones movie this year. Jesus Christ.
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I love the book and was hoping for a great movie, so pretty disheartened to hear this review. I hope Bana isn't as bad as you say he is Harry; personally I really rate him and I really can't see him being 'horrifyingly awful', but I guess I'll see for myself when it opens in the UK. Sniff.
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classic. But, wait, talkbackers, I thought Hairy Kneels was a Hollywood whore? Never saw a movie he couldn't spin postively?
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There's a movie that Harry doesn't like? I am shocked. SHOCKED I SAY! No, really, I really am shocked. I didn't think Harry knew how to write a negative review anymore.
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At least they let the ladies get nekkid. P.S. Is it just me , or did Scarlett Johanssen lose all her acting skills the moment she went blonde?
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What we want to see Natalie and Scarlett doing is not in this movie. But it has been filmed. A Hollywood producer has that film in his private collection and shows it to close friends.
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Harry thats hilarious! What a great way to phrase unsubtle delivery of information.
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Elizabeth: The Golden Age and now this, it's a damn shame.
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was a long, lingering, well-lit, 10 minute scene of a nude Natalie Portman and Scarlett Johanssen chowing each others boxes. Everyone knows french sisters like to hook up. Seriously, Dangerous Liasons sucked too, but it was saved by Uma Thurman's 18 year old tits. Scarlett could have done the same to save this crap fest.
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This is the first negative review I've read from him. I'm sure there were others but I can't remember.
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...were in "The Assasination of Jesse James", too. Not easy to dismiss a film on these grounds.
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BODY SNATCHERS. WHAT DID YOU DO WITH HARRY???????? NOOOOOOOOO PLEASE GOD NO. HE JUST GOT MARRIED. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO I DONT WANNA DIE
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http://tinyurl.com/3blx4w
Seriously, trying to read your reviews, is starting... to hurt - my, brain. -
That was one of the best lines I've read in a long time!!!
Classic! -
Milos Forman made that...?!
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You realize of course, that by bringing up the fact that all the real action - as in people acting on their decisions - happens offscreen, you kill the only praise you had for this film, which was the quality of the script. If it's not on the screen, mate, it's not on the page.
With that faint praise, I had kind of hoped that stylistic differences would save this film for me, but that's a massive structural problem, and it's the kind of thing they should have seen all too easily, same as the cinematography. Let alone the continuity errors... Was there a script supervisor in the credits?
Gahhh. The one hope you left me with, killed in talkback. You're a big red bastard for teasing me like that, you know. -
I guess I misunderstood the cloud thing, and continuity was not the issue. Even so... Even so.
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I'd be interested to see some psychology research aroud how people express opinions online. It's a public as it gets, and if you think the perception of mob decision-making doesn't play a huge part, you're nuts.
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I can't see how this could possibly be any good at all. Scarlet and Natalie completely suck at acting.
We don't need another Marie Antoinette do we?
This doesn't even interest me as a DVD rental.
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz -
King Henry the 8th had a secret that NO one knew until now.....
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Gears of War: The Movie coming to a theatre near you soon....
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Feb 22, 2008 11:40:17 AM CST
Harry, you mean you didnt like it?
by lloyd bonafide the korean war veteran
Im shocked!!!!
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at all.
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TIME-LAPSE CLOUD FORMATIONS have ruined literally hundreds of films for me over the years. It's about time someone put a stop to them. Cumuli Nimbus? Cumuli C**t more like.
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...that Harry gets slagged no matter what kind of review he writes. I've had the misfortune to see this, and he's right. The Tudors may play fast and loose with history, but watch that instead if this is your kind of thing. It's not the worst movie ever, or even this year, but it is one that you can go your whole life without seeing and be just fine. It comes off as a waste of time and talent on everybody's part. You can tell Bana figured that out at some point when they were shooting.
As for the cloud thing that Harry's talking about, its not some subtle thing that you have to keep your eyes out for. It's out of place in a period piece, and because it looks like they did it just because, they're no thematic consistency to justify it. -
He usurps the throne, kills Edward IV's sons and blames it on Richard III. Then marries Edward IV's daughter.
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"The photography in the outdoor scenes felt video – with over-exposed skies – and I swear to God – sometimes, completely out of place time-lapse CLOUD FORMATIONS – which felt completely and utterly out of place."
Has got to be one of the most poorly written things I have read in a while. Congratulations! -
and he's looking at CLOUD FORMATIONS
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They still made a couple of good films about him.
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"...time-lapse CLOUD FORMATIONS – which felt completely and utterly out of place."Well, how else would "completely out of place time-lapse CLOUD FORMATIONS" feel, other than completely out of place. Oh, wait. They felt "completely AND UTTERLY" out of place. I get it now.
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Wasn't that line in Romancing the Stone?
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Kudos, sir! You made my milk come through my nose. :(
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This the first negative review Harry has given in 3 yrs (no exaggeration). What about getting a Best of 2007 Harry? Too busy these days I guess.
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or it could actually suck. (and it really does look like it sucks)
With NP and SJH faking lesbo kisses to promote the film, you gotta know something is wrong with the film... -
Girl on girl?
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Harry gave a negative review?
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Not as horrifyingly inappropriate as Jonathan Rhys-Meyers. At least.
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Just rent either Elizabeth flick. Neither's great, but surely better than this hollow "epic".
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I thought it looked like it would be good. But you know, I felt that way about the Oscar nominated, THE QUEEN. Not that it was as bad as you say this is but quality-wise I thought it was BBC tv movie-ish.
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a DVD extra perhaps?
No?
shit. -
although Giant Robots might help, lol
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Feb 22, 2008 6:23:40 PM CST
Who cares about this film but Harry those Henry VIII paintings..
by jbud
were done when he was old and fat. When younger, during this movie's time, he was known for being quite athletic.
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Bana, Portman and Johansson? This movie had boring and lame written all over it. Bana hasn't done anything good, Munich sucked, seriously that movie was just boring and the casting was horrible (we have to have authentic actors and ruin their lives for movies like the Kite Runner, but people under the queens rule will do for jewish Israelis?) Maybe it was because I just watched the List right before Munich, but I found nothing good about that movie. Johansson doesn't try to act, and Portman is good for nerds who like little boys. Period pieces only work because of the cast, and when you cast a bunch of bad actors your not going to have a good period piece.
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That is all.
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There's been some talk herein about Henry being kind of a dick and thus not an appropriate subject of a film. Hitler of course makes a good counter, but I'm reminded of another flick starring Eric Bana himself. It's called Chopper and he is a very unpleasant man. But a great protagonist. And Bana plays him with utmost empathy. You don't agree with or even like Chopper by the end, but damn if you don't respect the guy. Which is largely due to Bana's performance.
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Yeah Bana was good in Chopper but it ended there.
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Tits mate. Tits.
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Fuck this film snob pussy bullshit, give me guns, giant robots, epxlosions and aliens. Why do I want to waste my time with the other shit, I can use it to play football or read SINESTRO CORPS WAR! THE BLACKEST NIGHT!
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Priceless. Can't wait to see his first feature. Isn't the role of the critic to describe, not lecture? Alas, an Ebert you shall never be...
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Feb 23, 2008 1:03:46 AM CST
Out of place cloud formations that are out of place...
by iamjack'suserid
I swear to God I think you made your point.
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I'll take the Boylen girl. Which one? The other one? No. The OTHEr Boylen Girl!
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How's about Spiderman 3? Or, um, FANTASTIC FOUR 2. FUCK!
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,,, you won't like him when he's angry
Munic owns
Chopper owns -
"The film is a washed up whale. Everyone that was at the screening that I talked to disliked it. It was just flat, over-acted and lame." But a few days earlier you're singing the praises of Will Ferrell. To each their own I guess, but I think you have this quote in the wrong review.
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Portman is Israeli. Bana is Australian. Johansson is American. However, in regards to other films your point is well noted. By the way if you hate having an American play this role, Johansson is going to play Mary, Queen of Scots according to IMDB
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Feb 23, 2008 8:44:37 AM CST
Speaking of English characters in English roles
by grammaton cleric binks
If they don't leave this scene out of Half Blood Prince I would to see the Potter universe and Love Actually universe collide with Hugh Grant as the prime minister. Wishful thinking I guess
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HE HE!
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You they cast Brits as Americans just as often, right?
Yeah, they can usually pull of the accent...but when they can't it's like nails on the chalk board to me. -
with juvenile sex references. Writers use these kinds of comments when they lack confidence in their skills as a writer to convey passion and meaning with their words. They shoehorn profanity into their writing and pepper it with junior high quality sexual innuendo as a way to ensure that people will read their words and be moved emotionally by them. Unfortunately, if Harry's reviews were food, they would be the diet soda and snickers bars of cuisine - all empty calories and fast dissolving sugars. No meat. No Starch.
Mature as a writer and develop some confidence in your work, Harry. This is why, after all these years, you're still self-publishing on your own website. -
No way. What a surprise. As if every film they've starred in has been masterpiece. The Star Wars Prequels, The Island, The Hulk. Fucking Masterpieces!
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Stop using so many fucking hyphens, that's for GED kids who can't use punctuation. I know your carby digits can rach the comma key, it's CLOSER than the hyphen. Stop swearing to God so much too.
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Was Thora Birch not available? Why can't we have an ADULT Ghost World reunion so I won't feel like a creep staring at the girls in that film.
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I like how you think its stupid if an American can speak with a British accent he/she will be fine playing British, but its ok if a Brit plays an American. You're a fucking hypocrite.
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The review was helpful, but Harry- you really need to proofread. Re-using the same words several times within the same paragraph, bad sentence structure, random fuckin' swear words... did ya write this just up in 20 minutes just before you went to bed?
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i found his point before to be spot on, -
In addition, the Brit TB'ers seem to have an inferiority complex. Americans don't care if a Brit plays an American, but cast and American as a Brit... all hell breaks loose.
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talent doesn't matter when you look like Portman or Johansson. Goddamn... you watch them, not the movie they're in.
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you got cutoff, but I got your drift, and a semi.
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He's gonna own you as a Romulan!
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Best Picture - Juno
Director - Julian Schnabel, The Diving Bell and the Butterfly"
Actor - Philip Seymour Hoffman, The Savages
Actress - Ellen Page, Juno
Supporting Actor - Chiwetel Ejiofor, Talk To Me
Supporting Actress - Cate Blanchett, I'm Not There
Screenplay - Tamara Jenkins, The Savages
First Screenplay - Diablo Cody,Juno
First Feature - The Lookout
Cinematography - Janusz Kaminski, The Diving Bell and the Butterfly
Documentary - Crazy Love
Foreign Film - Once
Someone to Watch Award - Rahmin Bahrmani, Chop Shop
Truer than Fiction Award - Neil Kopp (Paranoid Park, Old Joy)
Producers Award - Laura Dunn, The Unforeseen
John Cassavetes Award (best feature under 500,000 - August Evening
WAR JUNO TOMORROW NIGHT! -
And if you like it, you live in your mothers basement. HAHAHAH Jimmy Kimmel's unnecessary censorship with Mr. Rogers (WHO!!! does not have Marine tattoos all over his arms and thats why he wears sweaters. Thanks for the lie Harry). Which was funnier then entirety of Juno, AK. Anyways I saw something on this post I wanted to make a geek knock down about but then I got distracted. Which is the way I feel about this movie. I was watching this trailer then some dust started floating in the room and it seemed a lot more exciting.
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HARRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! When is the Gigantor movie coming to DVD????????? Or is it going to go the way of the Signal, and pop up randomly on hipster critics reviews till the end of time. I want Giant Robots!!!!!!!!!
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if Juno hadn't blown up... you know it would have been a massive indie classic. But, it did blow up. So, Juno faces backlash. Small, small, man. At least qualify what you say.
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Oscars love movies about pregnant princesses.
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seriously, this feels like the first negative review from Harry in like 2 years. Is the apocalypse nye?
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get fucked...he can act, he was a genius as "Poita" on Full Frontal
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You sad fucks...go and rent "Chopper" and try and get a good nights sleep afterwards. The guy can act. And no, this is not his Mum posting for him.
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I knew what you meant. I knew you would have a cow when you heard it. Can't say I blame you. I don't hate Johannson, but I think there are a myriad of actresses who could have been chosen. I think they were going for the eye candy factor. I'm not saying she can't grow as an actress, but I don't think the time is right for a role like that for her.
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Neither one of these tarts are really "actresses" and neither are so many other hot chicks in Hollywood.
Girls like this are always best in movies in which they are half dressed and overtly sexual. Covering them up and expecting them to emote, especially in a period piece, is simply begging for mediocrity.
Now if this had been Natalie and Scarlett in an NC-17 remake of "I Spit on Your Grave"...then you'd have something these girls could pull off.
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And an English snob, and too jingoistic to be even semi-aware of your own ridiculous ignorance. Do you realize how stupid you sound? Any British actress can play American, but US actresses are just genetically inferior. Oh shut the fuck up. Where do I begin to prove your theory is the total crapola it is? Huh, lemme see, ever hear of an obscure actress named Meryl Streep? No? Okay. Helena Bonham Carter is fine in Fight Club, but I hardly count it as one of the great performances of the century as you clearly do. She's doing a cartoon parody of a woman and a Yank accent. Emma Thompson, a great actress, never could get the full hang of the accent. Kate Winslet has a terrible accent in Titanic, and it was a mystery to me why they didn't just let her be English. Later she did Eternal Sunshine and she had gotten better, but she still sounds just that little bit odd. Many English actors (Aussies and Kiwis are soooo much better at it) cannot play convincing Americans and sound silly talking through their noses and flattening vowels into tortillas. It's like if we imitated you by going..."Pip pip! I do say!" Oh, and what's wrong with Gwyneth Paltrow's performances in Emma or Shakespeare In Love?? Nothing, except you're pissed that English actresses got passed over. Oh and she showed emotion in her Oscar speech - how dreadfully base! Meanwhile, Brits play Batman and US presidents and America doesn't so much as blink. You really do have a fucking inferiority complex - or is it a SUPERIORITY complex?? You think if someone comes from your country that just automatically makes them a better actor? Imagine if an American came on here and said that. Who's the nationalistic xenophobic twat?
Stick with your own film industry if you're so afraid of ferr-in-ers. Oh I'm sorry, I forgot, you don't have a film industry. -
He sucks.
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Because actors get the girls.
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That's not right.
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even with Natalie. I mean, no one even cares about the FIRST Bolyn girl.
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You're a producer. You've just been told you get to have this generation's greatest Breast(scarlett) and Butt(natalie) in your movie. Now...how can anyone screw up this film? Apparently it happened.
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My apologies. You're that rare thing, a snob from Canada. And a hopeless anglophile - which I am as well. But I still think your rank generalizations are just stupid. First of all, I don't remember this second "cuming" of Christ in the form of clothed stripper Jessica Alba. (Sin City, Fight Club...man, you really need to get out more, cinematically speaking - for a snob, you have very low-brow taste) I think everyone agrees she's megahot, but other than that I haven't heard anyone call her the next Streep. And you know what, she may get better. Gasp! You mean it's possible that people will improve into "serious" actors or actresses later in life?? And I happen to think Johansson and Portman are both on their way to being excellent actresses. Give them time, asshole. Why are you ready to have them killed? What's the big rush? Portman especially seems to have great control of her "instrument" (yeah yeah, insert dirty joke here) and have some real openness and emotion. I don't hold the Star Wars movies against, because George Lucas makes EVERYONE into a bad actor. It's his special talent. But there are also American actresses that are lesser-known, toiling in independent movies, etc, and who are you to write them all off because of their nationality? It's just silly. And do you think everyone working on Broadway is British? Whatever, dude. You got some kind of major chip on your shoulder, or else you just can't admit it when you make an unsupportable argument. Either way: fuck you too.
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but don't you DARE speak ill of crusty, dirty sock masturbation!
ahhhh that's the stuff!! -
A bad review from HeadShill? What's this? Didn't the studio acquiesce to your demands for schwag and sex in exchange for a good review this time?
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If it wasn't an indie type thing (clearly it was not) why did they LET him make such a "bad movie?"
How did it HAPPEN? With all those producers breathing down his neck, all the nit-picking about who's so fancy and WORTHY to be allowed to get their paws on their expensive movie. How does this happen? I thought that was the POINT of all the ridiculous hoops Hollywood with the capital H makes people jump through? Intersting review, Harry. Maybe you should be a director? And I mean that un-sarcastically. Maybe you are and I'm grossly uninformed... (Watched The Faculty the other day! Was fun to see you, Mr. Knowles!) -
"If I remember Anne of a Thousand Days, it was not terribly cinematic either by today's standards (or then actually), though it did let it's actors shine which may be more than this does."
Anne of a Thousand Days did get nominated for 10 academy awards, one of which was cinematography. It was a lush and beautiful film which did take some liberties with the history (it did have to compress 9 years in 3 hours after all), most Tudor historians have few quibbles with it. Genevieve Bujold set the standard for Anne Boleyn. I was not happy with the Other Boleyn Girl. The book had a lot to play with since not much is known about Mary Boleyn. The book was a fun read but no masterpiece. The movie not only didn't follow history very well (which it was fiction, not a documentary) but didn't even follow the book. I realize they had to make choices, I just think they made some very bad ones. The Showtime series The Tudors is so off and so bad that they should have just called it The Jones's or something.
I agree with Harry about missing the mark on Henry VIII. Henry's looks are widely known and they should have at least made him a red head. When he first met Anne, he was still youngish and good looking. I also think they really missed the mark on Anne. She was not a traditional beauty and it was her personality that set her apart, something that Bujold captured perfectly and Portman just didn't have the acting chops to pull off - the girl in the Tudors is so off the mark it's not worth comment. -
Mar 14, 2008 11:32:26 AM CDT
Despite incredible historical inaccuracies, the Tudors is still
by scytheofluna
The show may not be rooted in historical fact, but very few dramatizations of history are. The Tudors succeeds in being period eye candy with an interesting story, but fails to cross the line into something your kid could use as research for an accurate report on Henry the 8th. Sure it bothered me seeing Henry target practice with a musket when they hadn't been invented at that time, but I got past that, and the show is good mindless fun if you can accept that it's not factual in the least. As for this film, I was hoping it could maybe have the best of both worlds, but clearly that's not the case.
I'm not sure what the whole actress/accent debate is about. Portman pulled off a very convincing accent in V For Vendetta in my opinion, but she's an actress, not a fucking linguist. If you're going to get bent out of shape over something like that, well, don't go to movies. People in movies are totally faking it. They're actors. That's their job, to pretend. Suspend your disbelief, and get over yourselves.
There are plenty of actors who are really good at that kind of stuff so if you just can't take an accent that isn't perfect watch their stuff, as it's pretty close. Jamie Bamber from Battlestar Galactica, Guy Pearce and Christian Bale are all good examples. -
Why does it let you keep typing in the subject line when you've run out of room?
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"Breasts and ass" is all you got out of this? That's your meaningful addition to the discussion?
I've got nothing against either of them just for the record, and I would in no way dispute the fact that Scarlett Johansen and Natalie Portman are incredibly attractive and do indeed possess those very assets, but are you really such a pig that you would reduce these two performers to mere anatomical portions? Are you really that much of a loser? Despite an obvious miss on this film, these women are capable performers, and you're a real fuckwad for being so disrespectful. If you're fixated on tits and ass go rent some porn, as those women are at least voluntarily being objectified. Grow the hell up. It's people like you that make the rest of us guys have to work twice as hard to prove to women that we aren't misogynistic sexist douchebags. I don't know if anybody has told you but the ladies aren't fond of that shit. Maybe if you weren't so busy fantasizing about Scarlett Johansen's breasts you'd know that. -
Your "Stud Muffin" post up there saved me alot of time typing all that out. (BTW - Yes, this really is my UNCHANGED screen name - because I'm an actor who regularly plays that role.I'm well over six feet tall with a dark beard. Definitely not the "fat guy with a turkey leg" persona most people believe in. )
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Harry is infamous for his lack of writing skills but this article in particular was something that needed to be comment on.Anyway, sad to hear the movie sucks. I was looking forward to it.
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No, I'm not a stawker, I just got deese feelins, ya know? I saw her in some movie where she cries while the beginning music credits are goin, & I knew a star was born. Oh yeah, I also like Sally Struthers & Yan Can Cook, but just the show, oh and I really miss Gimme A Break w/ Nell Carter. Man, back then listening to Kraftwerk was so fresh & inspiring to me, what happened to those days guys?
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That film with her crying in the credits is called 'Free Zone'
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I saw the trailer for a new movie about a man who takes over the world. He had a pet pig and he was dressed in a military uniform. He amde everyone happy. Did anyone else see it? it was called dictatormovie I think.
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CHOCK-FULL of historical inaccuracies and half-truths.
Sucks' the way women were treated back in the day... -
Just watched thiscrap
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