Well folks, here we go... We've been hearing a few tidbits here and there about THE MYSTERY MEN, but here are the first two reports from the mysterious test screening up in Sacramento last night. As for as I know, this is the first screening of the film anywhere. According to both reports the film is running a bit longer than necessary, though neither mention where cuts should come, so this could be one of them Jeffery Jones comments from AMADEUS where one would retort, "Which notes?" After Robogeek came back a transformed toaster, he's been running a temperature ever since thus burning our precious toast on a daily schedule. Now I turn you over to... The UnNamed!
I'm all wired after seeing a preview of a crazy new movie called The Mystery Men at the Laguna Hills UA. It had the weirdest cast I can ever remember being in a mainstream film--Greg Kinnear and Ben Stiller and Geoffrey Rush and Pee Wee Herman--they were all great. The best was Janine Garofolo--she was hysterical, wielding a mean bowling ball. The story was something about would-be superheroes saving the city, but the movie was much hipper than it sounds. So much attitude. Stiller plays a guy named Mr. Furious. Pee Wee Herman was really funny with silent but deadly powers. William H. Macy from Fargo and Psycho was in it too--he played a character called the Shoveler whose wife just didn't understand.
It dragged in a couple of parts--they should maybe cut 10 or 15 minutes, but it was really original and it had a great look.
And now for the longer closer look at MYSTERY MEN from Kal-el
Just got done seeing a cool lil' flick you have mentioned in your sight before called MYSTERY MEN. And let me tell you... FUCK Superman, Spidey, Wolvy, Linda Carter, the Fantastic Four, the Wonder Twins and every comic book hero/heroine you grew up with - cuz there's a new "Kickin' Some Ass Team" cumin to a theatre near you! Let me tell you 'bout it...
On the doomed planet Krypton, scientist Jor-El had his unborn son Kal-El (still within his birthing matrix) placed on a hyperlight drive rocket. With his wife Lara, Jor-El watched the ship depart as a nuclear chain reaction destroyed the planet Krypton. Jor-El targeted his son's rocket to reach planet Earth, where he hoped his son would find a good life. Oh wait... wrong story... sorry. Let me start over...
It's happened again. For the hundredth time, I was "conned" by those little munchkins that carry the clipboard full of stupid questions and names and was forced into a corner to hear his shpeel about some new movie. OK OK... all he had to say was "Hi, do you want to go see a free movie?" and I was hooked. So sue me! I'm a geek!
The screening was held at the United Artists Laguna Village Theater in my lovely hometown of California's capitol, Sacramento. As with most of these "free movies" I have gone to, the "unfinished and rough" speech was given beforehand. I don't care, as long as there isn't too many "INSERT SPECIAL FX HERE" mentions running along the bottom of the movie. My friend and I watched this announcer mutant walk to the back, passing a row of suits. "Hmmmm," I thought, seeing their beady little corporate eyes. "Am I to be a guinea pig in their maze of corruption?" I then turned to my friend and saw that they had already got to him. The movie had started and I too was hooked.
Let me first state that overall the movie was a little too long, but the coolness factor and the comedy made me overlook it. This movie has so many bad-ass people in it, bad-ass gadgets and set designs, my brain was frying from ultra-coolness! The movie is about a group of "wanna-be superheroes" who feel it is their responsibility to save the world from mass destruction after the "real" superhero is, well, "missing." Harry, think of when you were that chubby little kid who thought he was Superman (or whatever superhero you make-believed) in your backyard with your friends but now at the age of 35 you still are playing it out - but for reals. No superpowers, no mental acuteness, just plain regular human powers. Everybody knows you are just a silly human, except your own self. That's what MYSTERY MEN is about. That little section of your brain that tells you, "Hey, you can be a superhero, no, you ARE a superhero, you can do it - believe! On that same note, "Talk Soup to Dear God to As Good As it Gets to mucho $$!" Greg Kinnear, plays the "real" superhero - And he is good!!
As for the MYSTERY MEN themselves, each character is so colorful and gnarly, and so well done by the actor that plays them, I was in utter bliss. The characters are as follows (hopefully I can get them all right...) Please forgive me if I forget - I'm still spinning from kicking some Hobgoblin ass...
William H. Macy - fucking incredible as the Shoveler- a father and husband who's wife wants out of the marriage and is in complete denial. He fights the bad guys armed just with a shovel!
Ben Stiller - as Mr. Furious! A man controlled by his ferocious anger. Think "The Punisher." And he has a cool motorcycle, as well.
Janeane Gorofalo - Definitely the best character! She's called the Bowler and is armed with an incredible bowling ball that has a killer skull inside it. She drips with the sarcasm and one-liners we have come to like from her. Too cool!
Pee Wee Herman - The Spleen. The name says it all and I think I busted mine watching him....
There was also another actor and I can't think of his name and I know I should know it - well, he played the "Blue Raja." A grown man armed with his mother's silverware (forks) he fights for justice! The dialogue between his mother and him is so funny!
And then there's the SHINE dude, Geoffrey Rush who plays the bad guy, Casanova Frankenstein. He plays it so well, so comic-bookish, so evil, you want to jump out of your seat and kick his scrawny little ass. His henchman are these cool Elvis-type guys who remind you of the Foo Fighters video...
There's a couple of other "Mystery Men" characters (Invisible Boy, and a "mysterious spanish dude" (no more said)) but these were the coolest ones that made the movie so good. Whoever made this movie (no credits during the film) has got to be a major geek! What a great concept - and to make it work with that range of cool actors, he should be hired to pick-up the Spiderman film - or any superhero film that should be made! Oh and I forgot to mention the Smashmouth song... I haven't heard this one on the radio yet, but it's definitely gonna be on one near you. Sounds a little similar to Walking on the Sun. Great song and works well with the film!
Well Harry - I tried to give you an overview of what I saw without any spoilers... I cannot wait for the finished product. I'm not sure when it's going to open, I think in the summer...
I'm off to fight for the justice of all geeks around the world! Wish me luck and until next time...
Kal-El
