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Latauro From AICN Downunder Has A Different Take On CLOVERFIELD!!

Published at: Jan. 16, 2008, 10:04 a.m. CST


LATAURO REVIEWS CLOVERFIELD

I've managed to avoid almost everything to do with CLOVERFIELD. Once I'd realised it was going to be An Event, I figured the best way to prime myself for it was to know as little as possible. Particularly if it was going to be one of those film that draws you in, and if the initial teaser with the hand-held party cam footage was anything to go by, it was.

But does it live up to itself?

Well, everything to do with the monster itself is brilliant. Utter perfection. What we see, when we see it, for how long, etc, this is all handled to brilliant effect. There really is no way to adequately praise the filmmakers for the genuine terror they evoke with the frustratingly-brief but still horror-inducing moments of creature that they show. It's so effective in its style, that I was honestly checking the cityscape skyline for damage as I drove away from the cinema. Not in a cute "what if?" sort-of-way, but because the film had genuinely convinced a part of my brain that this had happened.

But that part is very small, and that is due to CLOVERFIELD's ultimate failing.

CLOVERFIELD never fully lives up to its own concept. For us to really be sucked in, the documentary style needs to be convincing. We need to really believe this people are genuine and true to life. Giving us twenty minutes of "Dawson's Creek" with overly pretty people doesn't help this. Having them say things that sound written (as opposed to spontaneous) doesn't help this. The fact the characters are all so concerned with whether blank will show up at the party and if blank really likes them back actually makes them a bit annoying. They're all so pretty and rich and whiney that I didn't come to love them the way I think I was supposed to. And I don't think many others will, either.

The other problem is that it doesn't have faith in its own story. Survival is the name of the game. Get out of the city. Get away from the monster. That should be the key concern here. Mounting a rescue mission to get unrequited love out of her apartment building -- no matter how well executed -- turns it into DIE HARD. It's a terrific sequence, but unconvincingly so.

Similarly, the "smaller creatures" that appear are well-handled, but detract from the bigger one. Like they need smaller battles to fight to build to the bigger one at the end.

CLOVERFIELD puts so much effort into looking real, whilst at the same time containing so many contrived elements, it never fully achieves what it sets out to. Convincing your audience that what they're watching is admirable is a terrific starting point, but putting it so many Hollywood cliches simply undermines that. I like a lot of Drew Goddard's stuff, and I'm a big fan of JJ Abrams, but I really wish they'd all put more effort into fulfilling their concept's promise.

It has elements of greatness, but is, ultimately, not a defining moment of cinema... it's just a very good film. Which, though frustrating, will have to do.

Peace out,

Latauro
AICNDownunder@hotmail.com



Readers Talkback

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  • Jan. 16, 2008, 10:09 a.m. CST

    first?

    by viruswitshoes

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 10:12 a.m. CST

    Peace out!!!!!!!!!

    by Vamp-AICNchat

    That's what that dopey bitch says who Selma Blair plays in CRUEL INTENTIONS. LOL!! PEACE OUT!! LMFAO

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 10:12 a.m. CST

    question...

    by viruswitshoes

    so if i was in new york and it was being attacked by a giant monster, the first logical place i would go would be the subway would it not?

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 10:13 a.m. CST

    Watched it last night

    by lonecow

    It was great! I didn't exceeded my expectations or fail to live up to them, but perfectly met them, which is rare, and good enough for me. This review is kind of silly because the WAY the monster works is all to do with the documentary film style.

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 10:16 a.m. CST

    The movie's a blast

    by slone13

    It's not quite the cinema redefining experiance that some have made it out to be, but it IS fun. Latauro is right on about the dialogue and Dawson's Creek elements, as well, it's just too "scripted". It's never really able to make you believe these people aren't actors in a movie.

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 10:19 a.m. CST

    SPOILER?

    by Budcrud

    You mean there's a MONSTER? Damn.

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 10:22 a.m. CST

    THANKS SLY..... shit wrong talk back AGAIN..!!!

    by greigy just wanted to say

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 10:25 a.m. CST

    The monster is revealed here *SPOILERS*

    by Vamp-AICNchat

    http://www.wwtdd.com/post.phtml?pk=3389

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 10:26 a.m. CST

    so if the actors were ugly...

    by thinboyslim.

    ...you would of enjoyed it more?

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 10:29 a.m. CST

    Latauro is full of shit

    by messi

    it's because he lives in a shitty area of Melbourne.

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 10:30 a.m. CST

    i think you mean

    by FleshMachine

    cloverfield's ultimate failing is that the monster parts are small...you phrased it backwards...which doesn't really make sense. just saying.

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 10:30 a.m. CST

    Chreeeees Waddle

    by Mr Sparks

    It's not out until Feb 1st over here in the UK. Shitnuts.

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 10:34 a.m. CST

    "a terrific sequence but unconvincingly so"?

    by FleshMachine

    wtf does that even mean? can AICN get some better writers here...seriously.

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 10:35 a.m. CST

    Cthulhu

    by turketron

    So was the Cthulu (or however the fuck you spell it) driving Voltron? Was there a huge lion or Lionel? Did they drink Slusho at the end, or at least pour some on the Cthulu piloted Voltron? Did ManBearPig make an appearance (I realize that special effects haven't advanced enough to depict a true ManBearPig, but still...)? Dammit, you didn't tell us anything. Guess I will have to see it for myself.

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 10:35 a.m. CST

    again:

    by FleshMachine

    Convincing your audience that what they're watching is admirable is a terrific starting point, but putting it so many Hollywood cliches simply undermines that. ????????????????????????

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 10:40 a.m. CST

    "rob, I saw it. It's Godzooky."

    by classyfredblassy

    Still funny?

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 10:42 a.m. CST

    My wife and I may have seen the Texas UFO...

    by JDanielP

    ...and we don't live in Texas. (Holy $#!T...is there more than ONE?!!) Anybody else see that thing?!! (Catch the story at CNN.com)

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 10:42 a.m. CST

    "overly pretty people" Thank you! Yes!

    by Orionsangels

    This is NY for Godsake, not that there aren't pretty people, but where are the fat people? Are pretty rich white people the only ones that can afford a camera?

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 10:43 a.m. CST

    CNN.com UFO story in Texas (LINK)

    by JDanielP

    http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/tech/2008/01/16/reaves.texas.ufo.search.wfaa

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 10:45 a.m. CST

    Wild Cards ripoff

    by teammember8

    So, it's basically 90 minutes of the Swarm Attack from Wild Cards II: Aces High, right? Only, minus the Great and Powerful Turtle.

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 10:46 a.m. CST

    Anybody else see anything in the sky... that was...

    by JDanielP

    ...unidentifiable???

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 10:47 a.m. CST

    another MOnster sketch

    by Ebixby

    how does this rate? http://i63.photobucket.com/albums/h145/Eroybixby/c lfsketch2.jpg fill in space

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 10:47 a.m. CST

    UFO = Aliens that want to see Cloverfield...

    by turketron

    They made one hell of an ambiguous trailer, and the Aliens want to see what's up. If the movie's good enough, maybe they will spare us in 2012!

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 10:50 a.m. CST

    This is the best Clover review on AICN yet

    by ArcadianDS

    It was honest, it was to the point, and it didn't throw in any pointless "ZOMG BEWBIES!!!!" references.<p> This guy should be running this website.

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 10:54 a.m. CST

    For you ArcadianDS

    by just pillow talk

    http://www.aintitcoolnews.com/node/35100

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 11:04 a.m. CST

    Hmmm... this sounds about right...

    by drwilliamweir

    Do they dance around in silhouette? CHECK! OK, they explode, but it's still an iPod advert.

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 11:06 a.m. CST

    Fast Show refs...

    by DocPazuzu

    ...in a Cloverfield talkback! Whodathunkit? <p> Seeing Cloverfield... is very much like making love to a beautiful woman...

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 11:06 a.m. CST

    Scorchio!

    by boyblue

    Bring back the Fast Show!!!

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 11:11 a.m. CST

    The Dawson's Creek element actually works for me...

    by Cagliostro

    Seeing how NYC has been taken over by NYU and rich, pretty hipsters from who gives a fuck Wisconsin or wherever, that party scene seems fairly realistic to me at this point.

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 11:12 a.m. CST

    It's alive! It's Huge (that's badly written dialouge)

    by rsdigi

    They could have gotten away with "it's huge" but "it's alive?" No shit it's alive, even the transformers are "alive". That just sounds fake. Anyone agree? (the dialouge is from the trailer)

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 11:19 a.m. CST

    Thanks man...

    by Frankenbastard

    Thank you for writing a real review for a change, one that doesn’t sound like a 10 year old wrote it. The Dawson's Creek reference killed me I couldn’t agree more and I think that’s the only part that’s going to be a distraction for me throughout the whole film.

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 11:23 a.m. CST

    addendum: quint has posted another very good review

    by ArcadianDS

    My previous comment was prior to that. Quint's review is very well done also. But nobody should be surprised by that.

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 11:25 a.m. CST

    @ just pillow talk

    by ArcadianDS

    I know what the deal is with Neil Cumpston and I enjoy his work. Its intentionally written as a parody. Unfortunately, this review works as a perfect parody of Masswyrm's cloverfield review.

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 11:53 a.m. CST

    DID SOMEBODY SAY LION?

    by 'Cholera's Ghost

    Turketron has forced my hand. Mic check one-two!...<p>B b b b<br> I, i, i, i<br> G, g, g, g<br> L, l, l, l<br> I, i, i, i<br> O, o, o, o<br> N, n, n, n<br></p> LION! <p>We can dance like a lion<br> He is the king of beasts<br> And when he starts growin'<br> Destruction he’s sowin'<br> Takes down buildings like a wildebeest<br><br> Say, we can dance like a lion<br> We can take part in the hunt<br> Predatory cat will own your ass<br> Now everybody’s on the run<br> <br> We can dance like a lion<br> New York City is now his jungle<br> Watch him eat yo’ peeps up and down the street<br> Kill your main dude and your uncle<br> <br> Say, we can dance, we can dance<br> And I doth quote “[It is] huge”<br> We can dance, we can dance<br> Lookin’ for a bridge to chew<br> We can dance, we can dance<br> He’s breakin the convenience store glass<br> We can dance, we can dance<br> Blood fillin' all your safari pants<br><br> It’s the Lion Dance<br> The Lion Dance<br> The Lion<br> Yeah!<br><br> It's the LION DANCE!!!

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 11:54 a.m. CST

    Cumpston reviews Cloverfield!

    by Kloipy

    HOLY fucking shit man, cloverfield is like a crow that shoots vaginas out of it's eyes and shits blowjobs. 2 minutes into the movie i looked at my pants and my dick had turned into a werewolf gun that shot tits filled with napalm out of it that blew up amazon women and their ashes turned into eva mendes getting donkey punched by a smurf that had nail guns for eyes and a hat made out of taint scrapings and then I came. the end

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 11:55 a.m. CST

    Fuck you 'Cholera's Ghost

    by Kloipy

    it's the Cthulhu dance and NOT the lion dance

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 11:56 a.m. CST

    I think I captured the Cumpston spirit with that post

    by Kloipy

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 11:58 a.m. CST

    Kloipy I think we all know

    by 'Cholera's Ghost

    That's it's not Cthulu. That is just plain ridiculous. It is a lion.

  • Jan. 16, 2008, noon CST

    I think it's a Kathy Bates

    by Kloipy

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 12:07 p.m. CST

    "It's a terrific sequence, but unconvincingly so."

    by J-Dizzle

    A huge sea monster ravaging New York City is supposed to be convincing?

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 12:25 p.m. CST

    CONCEPT of MONSTER

    by Ebixby

    is thias even close? http://i63.photobucket.com/albums/h145/Eroybixby/clfsketch2.jpg

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 12:34 p.m. CST

    Jett that's the teaser.

    by messi

    i've seen it too.

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 12:45 p.m. CST

    Ebixby

    by midianiswherethemonsterslive

    Yup, that's reasonably close. Like the lady said, though, you don't actually see much of the monster. The "Armor back" one I keep seeing has the form kinda right, with the big-ass arms and all, but it was NOT armored like that.

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 1:06 p.m. CST

    so its only "a very good film"

    by slappy jones

    i don't know why but i find that really funny. almost as if you are bummed out because it isn;t a defining moment of cinema. i guess juts being a "very good movie" well have to do. jesus we get ou expectations way to cranked up these days....did anyone seriously think this was going to be a defining moment of cinema??

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 1:21 p.m. CST

    He lost street cred when he said..

    by disfigurehead

    " I am a big fan of JJ Abrams"

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 1:22 p.m. CST

    yeah

    by ballsxcrew

    yeah really that review was annoying. "wahhhh everyone liked it so im going to be out of step and find petty stuff to point out and be wordy to sound like im making a point." thats how that whooooole review translated to me

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 1:23 p.m. CST

    Accurate review

    by AlwaysThere

    Good to see this posted here.

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 3:44 p.m. CST

    the monster designs HAVE been leaked

    by nooneimportant

    go to my page at www.1337news.com to get the link. no bullshit. it's a link to drawings from people who've seen it. and they're good drawings too!

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 4:06 p.m. CST

    Unconvincingly terrific

    by Thunderbolt Ross

    How does that work?

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 4:20 p.m. CST

    NOW THAT IS A REVIEW

    by genro

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 4:21 p.m. CST

    1 +1=2

    by MRX67

    A mediocre film at best. And that is enough to put it on the dvd list. Still I want to rant about how overly hyped this movie has been as we dwindle to our last two days. What bogus b.s I got because there was some who thought J.J was going to shyt gold with this movie. Shame on you all who ridiculed me for wanting this to be Voltron. Curse J.J for putting up a fucked up Japanese site called Slusho. Damn Paramount for not returning my phone calls in the early days of the hype. Curse AICN for suckering me into this website that has some really good shyte on it from time to time and now I'm obsessed with the damn thing. Curse you all for not missing me during my departure. And Finally......Curse Cloverdud for not giving me anything to rant about anymore. Sniff sniff, I'll miss you Cloverdud, you over-hyped, rent-amonster from Japan, piece of shyte.

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 5:01 p.m. CST

    Uh Oh, Why Do I Get The Feeling I'll Agree

    by LaserPants

    I totally, completely, and utterly don't care about rich, pretty, 20 somethings. Point of fact, I kinda want to see them die. So, if I'm supposed to indentify with them and care about them, yikes! Probably not gonna like it as much as some of the other reviewers did.<br><br> Which brings us to the greatest giant monster movie ever made -- THE HOST. I not only liked the characters, I LOVED them, and cared them, and when bad stuff happened to them, I was upset. That was because they were a lovable bunch of working misfits, slackers, and screw-ups who, through adversity and love, reunite as a family and fight back against the cold dark monstrosity. Its actually quite a beautiful and heartfelt movie in addition to being scary as all hell.<br><br> Now I'm reserving judgement here, but if the whole heart of CLOVERFIELD rests on some rich kid getting a date with an unrequited love, I couldn't possibly care less. Still, I'm reserving judgement until I see it.

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 5:40 p.m. CST

    for once LaserPants I agree

    by EvilGeek1

    The Host was an amazing movie. Great characters and a cool fucking monster.

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 5:41 p.m. CST

    who is this "blank" you're talking about?

    by dtpena

    I didn't see him in the movie -_-

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 5:43 p.m. CST

    Totally, EvilGeek1

    by LaserPants

    One of these days maybe we can grab a pint and I'll convince you how great HOSTEL was! Lol!

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 6:08 p.m. CST

    GOOD REVIEW

    by stephen brown

    Honesty goes a long way ....

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 7:06 p.m. CST

    TWO GIRLS, ONE CUP (of CLOVERFIELD Poop)

    by LaserPants

    Ewwwwwwwwww.

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 7:57 p.m. CST

    Iron Man Indy Film! You Gotta See this!

    by Stark Industries

    I stumbled on this... If you are in anyway a Iron Man or even a Marvel Universe Fan, you owe it to yourself to watch/download/pass a long this video. After you watch it you'll wonder what this guy could do with a real studio budget! Have fun! David Gulvant... You are 'Da Man'!!! Invincible Iron Man (independent Short Film Project) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- THE INVINCIBLE IRON MAN SHORT FILM PROJECT When billionaire industrialist Tony Stark dons his sophisticated steel mesh armor of his own design, he becomes a living high-tech weapon, the world's greatest human fighting machine : THE INVINCIBLE IRON MAN. 2D animated, fast paced action, enormous fun from director David Guivant, and a must-see for all MARVEL COMICS' die hard fans. Download it here: THE INVINCIBLE IRON MAN TV SHOW http://outremonde.fr/modules/downloa...nt_ironman.mov Page were it can be found: http://www.movieweb.com/forums/showthread.php?p=214703

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 8:03 p.m. CST

    This review sounds about right to me

    by quadrupletree

    But I'll still go see it. It just sounds like typical JJ Abrams contrived shit, pretty actors saying unrealistic and simplistic dialog. He knows how to play up suspense though, and that's worth the hour and a half of entertainment. You just have to go in with that expectation. Frustrating, I know...

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 9:32 p.m. CST

    exactly what i smelled from the trailers...

    by JimmyJoe RedSky

    i dont care about the cast of "friends" running from a monster - or ross looking for rachel in the debris - more monster please - i still want to see it - giant monsters rule

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 9:34 p.m. CST

    review seems spot on from what I just saw on an MTV preview

    by MurderMostFowl

    The actors were really not believable. I did not could not keep suspension of disbelief because of their dialog. Oh man it was bad. Every time they spoke, it felt like a parody for GEICO or something.

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 9:46 p.m. CST

    this reminds me of "death proof"

    by JimmyJoe RedSky

    i defended that movie until i saw it and realized the haters were dead on - i hated the victims and sided with mike - especially batch 2 (the makeup girl and stunt woman bunch) - i hope the monster wins this time - crush those cute fashion smart hipsters

  • Jan. 16, 2008, 11:53 p.m. CST

    Characters

    by enderandrew

    This review just doesn't do it for me. Bitching about the perfect lives of the characters just shows that the reviewer completely missed the movie.

  • Jan. 17, 2008, 12:06 a.m. CST

    i read it as he couldnt connect as a viewer...

    by JimmyJoe RedSky

    if something rings as false or contrived when it sets itself up to be seen as genuine - then it usually is false or contrived - its just one review but i get the same vibe from the trailer - all the mayhem feels real - but when the characters talk it feels self aware - but maybe thats just the scenes shown in the trailer - id like to see the same movie but with just the camera man taking center stage - all he is taping is fleeting and hard to follow - wed just have his voice to follow - id buy that

  • Jan. 17, 2008, 1:08 a.m. CST

    Beverly Hills 902 9:11 meets Godzilla Crab Witch

    by quantize

    Most of the audience was giggling...except the kid a few seats along who was gasping 'oh my god' sitting forward in his seat. This film requires complete suckers to work.

  • Jan. 17, 2008, 1:10 a.m. CST

    PS the review is easily the most accurate

    by quantize

    Harry and Herc sound like blinkered bought idiots.

  • Jan. 17, 2008, 1:11 a.m. CST

    ..but its not a great film

    by quantize

    that would have been an accurate conclusion for such a perceptive and awake identification for some 'monster' flaws in this film..the size of Manhattan itself

  • Jan. 17, 2008, 2:09 a.m. CST

    here's my review written 2 minutes after

    by messi

    I opened my front door after the screening. guess aicn won't be using it. but it's a talkbacker review. <p> The whole thing is filmed from a video camera, but it's not bad, it's not a bad thing. I thought even though the trailer showed the potential in the idea of a monster movie filmed from a camcorder to make it seem realistic, that after a while it would would hurt your eyes because of crazy camera work. But not so. There is crazy camera work at places but for the most part it's steady and just when the action beats start where they are running or something crazy is happening does it go crazy and yes it does feel realistic. In fact very realistic. <p> This is a big movie by the way, the scale. I mean most big scale movies have certain set pieces that are choreographed to show certain destruction etc but this monster(which isn't humanoid by the way) fucks up ALL of Manhattan, there is no limit to what they intend the monster to do. Manhattan is up for grabs. <p> The start of the movie has it establishing the main players including that guy Rob(from the trailer) and this girl who he has a romantic connection with then people at the party. It's handled really well and you know who these people are when shit goes down. Everything is paced perfectly and edited perfectly to set it up when the Monster attacks. So then the monster attacks and it's insane. It's very realistic well for what I imagine a monster attacking NY would be like, including people taking photos of the Statue of Liberty's head with their camera phones, looting stores etc. There's action beats and then a storyline created where during the evacuation the Rob guy has to go rescue said girl whom he has romantic feelings with. So everything unfolds like that. <p> What astounded me is like I said the scale, the set design, the way the story unfolds and what happens to the characters unfolds and how it's cut together. It's big. I mean the destruction is huge, everything is torn down. And the camera work is just great especially the way they edit it. <p> There's this sequence when the main players are in the centre of the city, the monster comes out, then an RPG missile flies past and the camera turns to show the military just giving it all they have and the monster fucking shit up. Intense. The shots they decided to use were genius, especially the way they show the Monster. There is this other shot of the players watching tv and the tv camera showing the monster drop pieces off itself which turn into these fast moving big dog size spiders and the military trying to shoot them down. I have to say visually it is very awesome. <p> I loved how there is no explanation, it's just a monster attacking a city, people trying to survive, the military dealing with it the best way they can(they are just there, we don't know what they are going to do, what their plans are which is awesome) and then just seeing how it unfolds. I think the hype was well deserved, this is a very entertaining movie that brings a twist to something classic. This is what Godzilla 98 should have been, at least entertainment wise. I'm pretty sure this will be huge, of course there will be the aicn detractors, there always are(people talking shit about there will be blood, are you fucking serious?) but this is a geek movie of high calibre. ure the Blair Witch Project had this idea before. But that movie didn't have a Giant fucking Monster destroying New York(and it was good)....Sinestro Corps War! <p>

  • Jan. 17, 2008, 3:03 a.m. CST

    Just saw it

    by Zappary

    Freaking awesome. I had no problem with the characters or their dialogue.

  • Jan. 17, 2008, 3:05 a.m. CST

    Star Trek Teaser

    by Zappary

    PRESIDENT BALTAR's description of the ST teaser is correct, by the way.

  • Jan. 17, 2008, 3:20 a.m. CST

    You guys need new friends

    by quantize

    if you had no problem with either the dialog or actors. It made Starship Troopers sound like A Man For All Seasons The film utterly fails its basic premise to suspend disbelief and create a believable hyperreal depiction of a monster attack. Instead it looks contrived and phoney. If you cant see that then you can safely class yourself in the category of the retarded fanboy sitting a few seats awaying gasping at the AWESOMENESS whilst the rest of the audience giggled.

  • Jan. 17, 2008, 3:55 a.m. CST

    Peas Out

    by Mr Sparks

    I hate those little green bastards.

  • Jan. 17, 2008, 4:06 a.m. CST

    Excellent review, not too keen on the yuppie spawn characters ei

    by KillaKane

    Sounds like a better mix of characters and and a more improvised and realistic approach to dialogue would have helped tip this into something classic. Still jazzed about seeing it, sounds pretty damn good so far.

  • Jan. 17, 2008, 6:43 a.m. CST

    quantize

    by messi

    what are you talking about? most audiences I hear loved it.

  • Jan. 17, 2008, 7:22 a.m. CST

    what the fuck do you mean, disfigurehead?

    by Executor

    "He lost street cred when he said, 'I am a big fan of JJ Abrams'"???<p>So, Omar, Marlo, Chris and Snoop don't like JJ is what you're saying? <p>You're a dipshit if you think JJ is not talented. <p>This reviewer is an idiot too, btw, so you're not alone. Cloverfield was an excellent movie. Fun, tense, fresh...not the second coming of Jesus but it's a movie what are you expecting? Yes, moments sound "written", that's because, gee, I don't know...IT WAS WRITTEN. If you want an hour and a half of unscripted handicam go watch youtube.

  • Jan. 17, 2008, 8:24 a.m. CST

    IT WAS A GIANT LOAD OF....

    by theoneofblood

    Mediocre. I'm sorry but it was. I was really excited about this new approach to the monster movie genre but in the end it was just terribly lame and also, horridly unrealistic. The characters were entirely unsympathetic and made some hugely stupid and unbelievable decisions which totally took me out of the movie. <p>If a movie purports to be a "realistic" or "situational" depiction of an event, even something as silly as a giant monster fucking shit up, you need to make me believe in what the hell is happening. The characters were all giant retards, with Rob being the worst offender. I could see they were trying to do "realistic" dialogue as well but mostly it was just VERY annoying with characters repeating questions and other characters not answering those same questions and looking distracted whilst the camera swung around like a monkey on speed. <p>Strangely enough this movie actually did make me slightly nauseous, whereas the Bourne films did not so go figure. I don't know what everyone is talking about personally. I think the monster looked quite idiotic and also the CGI was pretty bad especially near the end. The worst crime of all, in my opinion, was the lack of tension. It was mostly annoying talking SUDDEN LOUD NOISE AND SHAKY CAM and then back to annoying talking. <p> Look, if I was going to make this movie I would have done it in two different ways. <p> 1. Had it from the perspective of a squad of soldiers with cameras on their helmets and then cut between them. 90% of the shaky cam would be eliminated, you'd have some clearly defined action/tension and the story would actually go somewhere. <p> or <p> 2. Have it from the perspective of a survivor watching the tape trying to piece together what happened. Make it some kind of fucked up mystery/sci-fi/horror flick. That would be way more interesting. <p> I give it 4/10

  • Jan. 17, 2008, 8:29 a.m. CST

    Oh yeah and...

    by theoneofblood

    There's a reason people don't make many movies about characters on the periphery of the action. THEY'RE BORING. Unless you're going to do something amazing like the first 2/3rds of War of the Worlds. Think about a movie about that curly-haired douchebag in Independence Day who gives that hilarious "WTF" look when the first building is creamed by the aliens. Would you pay money to see him struggling with him simultaneously impotency issues and spending 99% of the time running from dust and/or spouting annoying shit?

  • Jan. 17, 2008, 9:39 a.m. CST

    Cloverfield sux

    by darrenspool

    Saw it today. Nothing special. Annoying characters too.

  • Jan. 21, 2008, 3:38 p.m. CST

    Cloverfield is a great flick!

    by rutgersjaffo

    I don't get some folks. You cry and cry and cry about how Hollywood spoon feeds you. You whine and whine and whine about how people need everything spelled out for them. And then when a movie like this comes along, you dump all over it because you 'don't see enough of the monster' or because 'they don't explain what it is or where it came from' or because you 'don't LIKE the characters.' What the hell do some of you people want?! This was a really entertaining movie. It put YOU in the middle of a situation where all the sudden your comfortable life is interupted by some seriously bad shit; shit you don't fully understand because you don't have all of the facts. Some of the nit-picking just AMAZES me. You say it's bad because YOU don't like the people it centers around?! WHO the hell said YOU get to dictate what the characters should look, feel, or act like in every movie? Here is an idea for you: PLENTY OF PEOPLE DO HAVE VERY NICE LIVES AND ARE ACTUALLY QUITE ATTRACTIVE! Sorry, but them's the breaks, kids. If you are ugly or can't afford an apartment over-looking Central Park, i'm sorry but that's not my fault. You should have chosen a better career path I guess. Maybe some of you would be better served watching over-hyped Korean crap like 'The Host' or all-night Anime marathons? Because the more I visit this site and read the comments, it seems like a lot of people on here just hate everything that isn't so obscure or over-the-top that more than 5 people can claim to enjoy it. Hey, I hear you can get a copy of 'The Brown Bunny' for like 99 cents these days on e-bay...ENJOY!!!

  • Jan. 22, 2008, 1:12 a.m. CST

    rutgersjaffo, i agree!

    by Redmantle

    Yeah, I've been seeing a lot of posts about the "unrelatable yuppie scum" characters. Jeez! But you're right, there are people out there who are good looking and make money, and go to parties and talk relationship nonsense. I guess I'm yuppie scum too, because I'm on a career path and I'm relatively decent looking. I guess too many people on this site live in their parents basement- or at least, that's the impression I get from some of these posts.

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