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Midol Girl says THE GOLDEN COMPASS made her a 10 year old girl again!
After seeing The Golden Compass a couple of days ago I walked out grinning the kind of grin that could only be attributed to something far greater then special effects; mind blowing production design and a riveting adventure story. No, there was no oiled-up hunk rubbing my shoulders and feeding me popcorn kernel by kernel. And you can't count Quint offering to buy me a bag before the show or Harry (drooling over the Speed Racer trailer spectacle) as any substitute.
Directed and adapted by Chris Weitz (nominated for best writing, adapted screenplay academy award in 2003 for About a Boy) and debuting Dakota Blue Richards as the lead Lyra, The Golden Compass is based on the Phillip Pullman novel.
To be honest, I hadn’t read the book and walked into the theatre knowing little about the story. After seeing a Comic Con display of a few of the production props, wardrobe pieces and art department samples, I knew was in for a production design orgasm. I also watched the trailers a few times getting me giddy. I felt my little girl excitement for this type of fantasy adaptation.
However, the movie previews left a bitter taste in my mouth when it came to the CG. I winced at the sight of the cartoony movements of the realistically designed side-kick animals or “Demons”. After the movie finished I felt that a few more hours of rendering lighting effects on the furry friends wouldn’t have hurt. A few Demons were created well enough that you forgot they were nothing but moving blobs of pixels; others didn’t keep that secret so well. But, her best friend’s little puppy daemon, even as cute as he was, was the worst. With so many other computer born animals flying, crawling and slithering in and out of the frame the hit-and-miss animation became distracting and took away from the lead animals that were really well done.
The thing with this type of CG that irks me is that we are not watching them in their natural computer made environments. Poorly rendered digital characters are easier to forgive when the rest of their environment is also made of poorly rendered CG. Cough- Shrek, ahem. But by placing fake animals in live action settings requires the audience to have a large propensity to suspend their disbelief. I understand, from a technical stand-point, that the task of dropping CG into a previously shot film scene is hugely difficult in comparison to just animating everything from the get-go, but still it’s hard to see past the special effect’s jarring presence. It wouldn’t have been so bad if the animals moved like animals, because they looked like animals- but they looked like animals and moved like cartoons. That sort of thing works in a film with a more playful vibe, like Babe but The Golden Compass was a dark fanciful epic tale.
This “not being one thing or another” and the blending of story-telling methods seemed to be the main downfall of The Golden Compass that transcended beyond the CG.
The overall treatment of the subject matter made it hard to pinpoint for whom exactly the movie was made. It’s largely marketed at children and families but the slow pace and predominantly talking-head expository dialog won’t likely hold this young generation's short attention span. On the other hand, the dialog, as heavy as the subject matter was, wasn’t complex or intellectual enough for grown-ups. So, there was this kind-of wishy-washy feel to the tale. There were some scenes that were fairly graphic like this full-on violent polar bear battle (there for shock value?) that seemed to come out of nowhere. That had the movie geekoids around me laughing.
It’s no secret I am a child of the 80's, as is evident by the nostalgic movie memorabilia I have around my apartment. Star Wars ships, TMNT action figures and a Cabbage Patch Kid sized Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man looming over my keyboard. I practically popped out a movie geek, As a baby, I’m sure if I was offered baby food made from mashed popcorn I would have opted for that instead of split pea. I hate split pea anything now but have regular hankerings for that over-priced buttery evil of all carbs in a bag.
The trouble with being born a celluloid geekette isn’t the cellulite you incur from hours spent sitting and stuffing your face mindlessly, but the chip on your shoulder that grows larger every time you watch yet another amazing family adventure flick starring a courageous outlandishly imaginative little boy.
As a little girl, I loved going to the silver screen. I loved almost every part of it. The part I didn't love was that I seldom saw myself being reflected back from the silver screen. Are we as family fantasy film lovers supposed to see the adventurous little boy-rascals fighting dragons and saving their friends as “the little boy” in all of us? If we were not, then we would sure be SOL wouldn’t we? The box office would be down a few numbers too, because despite 80’s and 90’s family adventure flicks most often starring my male counterparts, it wasn’t just the boys watching these flicks. Most of my girlfriends have the same type of nostalgia associated with The Goonies as any of the boys in school, despite the fact that the only two girl characters in this film were whiny little hanger-ons love-interest sidelines.
We girls loved these movies just as deeply as the next guy. Why? Because we didn’t have much of a choice and the adventures that these little heroes had captured our imaginations far beyond any My Little Pony could. Does that mean that the void of adventure seeking little girls went unnoticed for us, or that it didn’t have any sort of long lasting impact? Not for me. Just because you love movies starring little boys doesn’t mean that you aren’t perturbed there are too few girls majestically riding an animal into war, fighting pirates, searching for treasure, or befriending robots.
The time has come when a little girl should be able to go to a movie with her Mom, Dad and bratty brothers and go “Woh coooooOOOooool” from the heart.
Bottom line is despite it’s CG shortfalls and atmosphere made for a 10 year old with the attention span of 20 year old, I was extraordinarily happy with the film. Maybe it’s because I watched it with the movie-loving eyes of a ten year old set in my 20-something year old body. Maybe it’s because seeing little Lyra rescue her best friend while staring down scary gypsies and asserting “What are you looking at?” or “Don’t ever call me a lady!” was nothing short of therapeutic for me. After years and years of studio neglect, lack of acknowledgement of my adventurous spirit and visual torment of having to sit and watch another little heroic boy have all the fun while the girls duck and waddle behind him whining, crying, acting pissy and pouting, Finally I say, finally.
-Midol Girl
Remember these childhood adventure classics? I do – they are my favorites! I don’t see a single girl story here though. Does this year’s The Golden Compass mean times are changing? I sure hope so.
Luke Skywalker, Star Wars 1977
Jen - The Last of Gelflings, The Dark Crystal 1982
Bastian, The Never Ending Story 1984
Elliot, E.T. 1982
Pony Boy, The Outsiders 1983
Billy, The Gremlins 1985
Michael, The Peanut Butter Solution 1985
Marty McFly, Back to The Future 1985
Mikey, The Goonies 1986
Sean, Monster Squad 1987
The Grandson (Fred Savage), The Princess Bride 1987
Willow, Willow 1988
Luke Eveshin, The Witches 1990
Kevin, Home Alone 1990
Andy, Toy Story 1994
Hogarth, The Iron Giant 1999
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You need to put more pictures of yourself after your reviews
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That had a cruelly pre-legal Jenn Connely as protagonist...
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Burn the reviews!
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Some Golden Compass reviews? Doesn't anybody have anything to say about that film?
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coz i dont get it no one said whether its good or bad, i bet roger ebert is gonna give this 3.5 stars.
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Yeah Midol Girl, you tell it how it is! Wooooooo! More girls fighting dragons and solving mysteries is what we need. Actually, I don't care either way - just thought I'd lend my support to the fairer sex.And do you, Harry and Quint really go to the cinema together? Aren't you worried about jocks throwing popcorn at you?
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if you are in your mid 20s now that would have made you 5 or 6 in 1987.
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Thanks for the tip.
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and put it in live action it wouldn't work. The Shrek creatures work great in the Shrek environment.
Get it? -
Was you pussy juices coated in chocolate during the speed racer trailer? Or has Harry just not cosumated his marriage yet?
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damn it's been a long day talking about Lep in the hood
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... and E.T. could have been a chick. That Bastian kid was kind of gay, too.
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I'd always assumed she WAS a 10 year old girl.
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to kill a fucking mocking bird
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I thought that was the whole point of the movie, kid in the closet, er, attic, treated mean by the other kids because he was different, creates a fantasy world where the muscle bound youth Atreyu tries to solve the inner workings of Bastian's sexual conflicts ('they looked like strong hands' is an obvious reference to the fact that the pumped up homosexual males are no more confident in themselves than the less athletic). Was I misinterpreting it?
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like Kim fucking Possible
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She's ten shades of animated hotness
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you were spot on. Atreyu was he obviously open side, when his horse, Artex was drowning in the swamps of sadness it was a metaphore for Bastian coming out to his parents and their clear disapproval and consequent banishment of their son
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that's one tough chick
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with Satellite TV, she's willing to discuss it while fighting the queen.
Hudson wanted Cable, bitch! -
the newbie seems a 100 times more interesting. shes kind of the new jodie foster, u know not shy to reveal who she realy is, doesn't hide behind some innocent look if u catch my drift.
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She was truly outragous
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Anyone who was born from 1980-1986, Maybe 1987, but if you can't remember anything pre 1990 from your childhood, than that doesn't count. -
Say what you want, but nothing short of this being a massive blockbuster will vindicate this movie as the fantasy that had to be made before Peter Jackson's The Hobbit.
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everytime I see that I die a little
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Until they grow up... Tomb Raider, Ultra Violet, Resident Evil, Aeon Flux, Barb Wire, Dark Angel, Buffy, shall I go on? Maybe its because all those movies you mentioned were geared for boys while the girls were off with My Little Pony and Barbies. Don't blame boys for Market Trends just because you are cool and in the minority.
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in the same sentence
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she got bigger balls than i do thats for sure. i didn't see them but society led me to believe that if a person kicks some serious alien ass then he has to have got really huge balls:)
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You have to be born somewhere between 71-80 to be a child of the 80s. Being a "child of" a decade is because of the cultural influences. Someone born in 1984 wouldn't understand the significance of the Berlin Wall falling after the threat of nuclear holocaust in the earlier part of the decade; why Sting wanted his MTV; or why the 49ers were a dynasty.
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Girls got to be hero's too!
Leia had a big role in Star Wars. The entire film was about rescuing her. She was a princess, a spy, had the plans to destroy the death star, was tough as nails, beautiful, funny and intelligent!
Lily, Legend 1985 -Although she wasn't the main character she opened up the film and ultimately her final act saved the world from Darkness.
Susan Matthews Loomis, Baby: Secret of the Lost Legend 1985
Sarah Connor, Terminator 1984
Red Sonja, Red Sonja 1985
Chris Parker, Adventures in Babysitting 1987
You can't honestly say that Adventure films of this time period neglected and ignored girls/women. Lots of Adventure films gave the females vital roles- Even a few staring staring roles.
I'm sure theres more film's -
dont get good roles...only roles that rely heavily on the men parts---i came up with that:)
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sorry ladies
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those titles MidolGirl listed were definitely boy centric but to say that there were no girl centric stories in the 80's is pitifully disrespectful to girl centric stories of any decade. Annie anyone? How about Belle from Beauty and the Beast? Labyrinth (thanks ThePilgrim) is also an excellent example.
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Everything a big budget blockbuster should be and then some. More gripping than Gladiator, more tear-jerking than Titanic and, unlike a lot of recent historical epics, honest and accurate. So this is the must-see movie of the summer. And what a movie!... It's the kind of film David Lean would have been proud of - an event movie you've simply got to see. It's sensational.
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Under $40 million over 3 days is becoming more and more of a reality.
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are sort of at the age of discovery and curiosity which is why its interesting in fiction. boys at that age are kind of stupid to be honest, i remember girls being way ahead of boys in analytical thinking. they somehow mentally mature faster.
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Could you be anymore of a studio plant!!!! Wow! Exitement! Polar Bears!
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what a scary little girl. Hall of Heads still creeps me out, the part in the movie not the They Might Be Giants song
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Always did, always will. Crap ass movies with lame current pop culture references that won't mean shit in 5 years.
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but even i'm unsure about why Sting wanted his MTV.
i only know that he wanted it. that and you get your money for nothing and your chicks for free. -
she wrote novels like The Fountainhead and Atlas Shrugged, brad pit in one of them for the movie. anyway she depict women in her stories in an odd manner,basically saying that women like getting raped or rape fantasies that is. i thought it was weird coming out of a female writer.
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and it was booby good
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does she count or we focusing on visible ones only
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so can i hit it off with her or is she taken like all the pretty gals :)
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Cornelia, Santa Claus The Movie 1985
Seasonal Mentions! -
only one Narnia one. AICN IS TEH BIAS!!!111!
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it'll pull 30-40 mil this weekend, and then Big Willie Style will take over next week. Which is fine, I'm not really looking forward to the part in movie 2 where the 13 year old boy and girl reverse the fall of man by eating the fruit and getting freaky in the garden. Rubbish.
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narna is childish, u still dont know about golden compass. first of its calld His Dark Materials and its gonna have some radical stuff never seen on screen before
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And not one "I made a woman out of Midol Girl again!" joke from you nerds?!?!Amazing!!!
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http://tinyurl.com/3ae2ss
Looks like a clean tattless version of a Suicide Girl. Nice stud earring mole! -
Fell into a trap of your own devising!
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http://tinyurl.com/34bg2hShe is pretty cute.
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(the antithesis to GC) was also a tremendous female lead. When we came out the theatre there was a large group of girls who were going on and on about the lead female characters. And, given the load of female lead movies listed above, methinks Midol Girl needs to rethink her assessment. It don't hold water.
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Player! Respect!
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More Midol Girl:
http://tinyurl.com/37bst7 -
and make me a sandwich
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*Midol* *Water Retention* Hmmmm.
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but I was always impressed with little Sarah Polley in Baron Munchausen. So Midol, it was a so-so flick, but scored extra, extra shiny points because it featured a girl protaganist..
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I went on the GC website to see what my Daemon would be. It turned out to be a Tennessee Snail Darter. Go figure.
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...although I wouldn't know anything about that.
Nope, not at all.
Why are you looking at me like that? -
Brunettes in glasses are usually cute...don't know why, just is.
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Who else wants this?
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of her chest = I'm not reading.
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It's painful to read a comment thread for any article Midol Girl posts, no matter how well done the article itself is. The thread becomes about her, because this site is full of guys just as immature as me, or EVEN WORSE.
She has a valid point about the paucity of young girls in childhood action-adventure epics. Ten year old girls need daring role models just as much as boys do. Pointing out Ripley or Buffy is not countering her argument, it's reinforcing it.
And yet... while trying to rationally post, one's mind wanders to the over-the-shoulder pic she posted lo those many months ago... and the point one intends to make begins to be lost... and one begins to make a post just as ridiculous as all the other talk-backers.
We're both cursed, men and women, just in different ways.
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I thought he was kinda cute not gay. But don't ask me. I had a Brian Boitano poster.
As a girl child of the 80's I don't think I looked up to any movie chicks. Okay, maybe Leia, but most of my favorite movies are either "guy movies" or have a very male cast. Who wants to watch a chick running around trying to be tough/brave? Even to this day no one has really worked that out. For example, I thought Eowyn was incredibly dainty.
Anywho, I intend to see this tomorrow. I haven't read it either but the controversy angle has piqued my interest. -
bod. damn.
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Women's libbers are too high maintenance. You have to be a Mind Reading Jedi to make a women's libber happy. She really does need a Midol.
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We all have Penises. Some are more developed then others. Scientific Fact!
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Classic.
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I would definitely make the protagonist a female character. Who wouldn't want to see some sexy female Jedi ass-kickery? I think that would be right up your alley, Midol Girl. Alas, it's just a dream that's improbable.
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Everybody gets angry because she seems to imply that the geek community and large is sexist, and then we do nothing but prove her right, over and over again. "Who cares if you can't identify with any of the characters you see on TV, or in movies, or in books? Now show us your boobs!"
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I dont know if she was limiting this debate to fantasy alone, but aren't pretty much all horror films about female heroines? I was just thinking to myself that its very rare you have a male protagonist in a horror film. NIghtmare on elms street, Halloween, Friday the 13th, Leprechaun, Hellraiser, even the night of the living dead films tended to center on the women...
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We'd stop saying it!
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http://tinyurl.com/26tpmy
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Dec 06, 2007 5:24:32 PM CST
Okay, I can agree on that definition of an '80s child
by reel american hero
Especially as a 49er fan born in 1980, who was fortunate enough to see Jedi on opening day. Damn I feel old. -
I see your point Midol Girl. I still say we don't see enough role models for little girls who are presented as "being pregnant, barefoot and in the kitchen." That would improve a lot of movies. (Capable female heroes like Ripley are putting the FI into Sci-fi. Without her Alien is like a documentary)
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They just act like men/boys and label it 'girl power'. Might as well use the real thing.
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would be nice next time
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http://tinyurl.com/37rv7a
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looks like Steven Segal. Even though it isn't.
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Dec 06, 2007 5:42:10 PM CST
i want to have sex with midol girl, and play with her tmnt toys
by ironic_name
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the girls had the horror movies for their heroines, the only two male protgantists in horror films I could think of was Andy from Child's Play and M'Fing Ashalso the girls had every heroine in every Disney movie, who did the guys have Bernard who was loveable Bob Newhart idiot The Great Mouse Dective and Aladin so I think it balances out
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i missed that someone link, also, i fail to understand why she is single according to myspace, shes going to bnat - you dorks are looking for the girl in 50's glasses, maybe shes gay or youre ugly but you can only try right
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...Who gives a fuck what MidolGirl looks like? She writes like a no-it-all obnoxious 19 year old who thinks she understands how the world works... Hell, you don't hear the women or gay guys who frequent this site demanding pics of the guys who write for AICN... Maybe we should (except for Harry, because he's just a fucking lard-ass...)
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I think she makes valid points about the lack of girl protagonists in most adventure films. And she's spot on with her Shrek/CG critique. Guess I'm out of the club.
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hahahaha! that pic is hilarious.
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Anyone who thinks that Sarah, and not David Bowie's bulge, is the hero of the film is just fighting a hopeless battle for the Heroine's of Film conversation. Sadly, until Labyrinth chooses HD-DVD we may never see the full glory of the films' "hero".
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Elektra, Catwoman, All those other lesbian movies and all sexy. cuz I Love girl power movies for the big jiggling tits... not gonna lie.
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I am the ULTIMATE heroine fan.. I can even prove it..
http://tinyurl.com/38p7ph
this is the tat on my right leg! -
I never saw ROME so I can't really comment on the guy's acting but, from that picture, he looks a bit too 'big' to be the punisher. Or is that muscle? I can't tell.
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Dec 06, 2007 6:45:04 PM CST
I say THE GOLDEN GIRLS haven't taken Midol in at least 10 years
by anakin whoopass
Wake me when Indiana Jones starts.
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Rome is an amazing show! You should definitely watch it. As for Mr. Polo, he rocks, and it's muscle not fat. Being a gigantic Garth Ennis fan myself, I personally feel he's an excellent choice.
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And Fraternity Vacation was also awesome. That dude ruled the 80s (Oh Brewster you're so cool!)
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Not quite as much now, but I sure loved me some Fright Night at the time.
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hey talkback virgin squad, you guys have got your tighty-whiteies on a bit too tight i think - might be time to move up a size. don't you have some girl from your math class that might have looked at you once that you should be stalking right now instead of giving midol girl your best impression of an open festering sewer? or do you not even have the balls to be creepy in real life? yeah actually, you strike me as the kind of guys that would vomit and piss themselves from anxiety if a girl ever actually smiled at you... anyways I have to say i have 0 interest in the golden compass, but that's just me
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Dec 06, 2007 8:26:26 PM CST
Damn right there aren't enough hero stories for little girls
by jollymorphic
The smugness of nerds who have (like myself, I must qualify) spent their lives being courted and catered to by almost every segment of consumer and entertainment business notwithstanding, I'm glad to see at least one big-budget family movie (more or less) with a girl front-and-center in the hero -- not princess, but hero -- role. Even if it's just as crappy as Narnia or any of the rest of those jewels Hollywood has emitted since LOTR.
My little daughter wrote a letter to John Lasseter telling him we think his movies are great (most of our movie nights end up Pixar) but it's really not fair that the heroes are always boys. Here's John Lasseter, now King of Animation for Life, talking on the Kiki's Delivery Service DVD about how much he loves the Miyazaki movies (our next-most-popular movie night choice) and yet Miyazaki's heroes are USUALLY girls and Pixar's NEVER are. In a country that many Americans consider retrograde with respect to male/female relations, here's a guy producing beautiful, well-told stories brimming with characters, plot, emotion, depth, what have you, and the heros are LITTLE GIRLS! Look at what these girls go through in Spirited Away and Mononoke. No princesses they!
And yet these boys at Pixar, whose talent at story-telling has rightfully propelled them to superpower status in American animation, nevertheless can't seem to muster all these millions of dollars and MFLOP-hours and cushy meeting rooms and lattes to crank out ONE LOUSY MOVIE where the hero is something other than "me as a young man" (Bug's Life, Cars, Ratatouille) or "me as a dad" (Monster's Inc., Nemo, Incredibles). Miyazaki lived a comfortable youth too, but he ended up being able to make movies about someone other than himself. -
Yes, I realize that literally speaking, the title character in Princess Mononoke was, obviously, a "princess." But NOT in the DISNEY sense of the word, I mean to say.
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girl child, not, you know, Angelina fucking Jolie. However, The Adventures of Baron Munshun- whatever is an acceptable comparision.
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You just chose to identify with the male characters instead.
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well, i'm a girl; i'm a child of the late 70s/early 80s (meaning i saw both star wars AND goonies in the theatre, thanks very much); and while, yeah, it would be nice if there were more female leads in films, i don't sweat it too much. girls also read books and study, and there are plenty of heroines in literature and history that have inspired many women to do far greater things than characters written directly for the screen have. if you're a girl and you think you're getting short shrift, then you do something about it, like become the most powerful executive in the history of television or a pulitzer prize-winner or, golly gee, you run for president. you shouldn't pretend the man is getting you down just because harry potter is mostly about a boy. that's crap and any girl who pulls that just hasn't worked hard enough.
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ItWasCool.com (i'm a spider)
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They kept going again and again and again to that treacle Titanic to swoon over Leo.
And all you future Chris Hansen victims, why don't you just ask for her myspace page? -
all annoying. Everything just felt totally uneven and out of place in this review. I was expecting to hear something about the actors, and overall empathies of the story, but all I got was half a movie review and half a piece that talks about her love for movies that basically came straight out of nowhere.
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We have the same stats and I pretty much agree with you. I'll also chime in to say I thought Harry Potter had wonderful female role models (Smart, quidditch girls!!)
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http://tinyurl.com/3da3bd
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would rock! As for geeks and female heroes, well, when a full figured 31-year-old gets casts as Wonder WOMAN (who looks kinda, sorta... EXACTLY like she looks in the comics) and geeks freak out, and some more geeks freak cuz there's nipple shots of her online... well, let's it's good thing that the female hero of this movie is a young girl, because geeks really shouldn't comment about women heroes. At least until they sleep with one
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add you to the roster!
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Saw this one last night at my theatre(yay for being a manager). Pretty decent, though the ending was WAY too open. Also, I expected Eva Green's tits to have more of a starring role in this, not 45 seconds of 'meh', then nothing.
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For a sci-fi/fantasy lit class. It was definitely anti-religion, anti-Christian. I'll probably see the movie just to compare, but I'm already hearing that a lot of the anti-religion theme is out. I don't think having a point of view opposite from the majority is bad, but if they wanted to make a kids movie they shouldn't gut a decent, not great, but decent story like this was.
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there was a strong girl character in that, right?
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you name luke skywalker right there.
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there, female hero.
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Dec 07, 2007 2:30:21 AM CST
i'd like to leave a sweet taste in your mouth, midolgirl.
by ironic_name
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"I practically popped out a movie geek, As a baby, I’m sure if I was offered baby food made from mashed popcorn I would have opted for that instead of split pea. I hate split pea anything now but have regular hankerings for that over-priced buttery evil of all carbs in a bag."
Christ even her writing reads like a woman talks. I felt my mind wandering at that point. Just REVIEW already and stop blathering on, woman! ;) -
careful man, rape jokes are difficult. I think the definition of "child of the 80's" is flawed. I consider myself a child of the 80's but was born in 78. It should beanyone born 77-86,
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they draw out all the neanderthals (myself included), and the female TB contingent- that many swear is mythical- reveal themselves. Unless Buffywrestling and Occula are actually fat 40 year old bearded nerds bashing away at their keyboards wearing nothing but slightly soiled y-front and a curry stained T-shirt that reads "I'm the teenage girl you jerked off in that chatroom with".
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Tis true I am a female with a slightly bondo stained T-shirt, but mine reads, "Zombies: Eat Flesh" , a parody on the Subway logo. I saw Stars Wars in the theater twelve times; however, I also saw Annie in the theater five times. I think it sorta balances out that way. ( We shall not speak of Grease or Grease 2 ).
I will say this for Midol Girl's reviews, I like reading them for a different insight just as much as I like Masswrym reviewing the movies that I *know* I will never willing watch - but might catch them on Movie channel one time. And I must say in her defense, that I hope she never willingly asked Quint and Kraken to post the down-top picture that accompined her first review - that it was a bit of "monkey-shines" on their part - and not intending any true malice. However, that one pic has damaged her reviews in some respect. I suggest she start being a bitch. At least then people would have a reason to be rude to her back.b -
I've come over all funny. In all honesty I actually prefer Midol Girl's reviews to massawyrms and think this place badly needs a female viewpoint, but some of her writing is a bit, well, pathetic. Mind you, so's harry's and don't even get me started on mirajeff- The M-O-M of reviewers.
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That's news to me.
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but it is an easy shot. (Harry is fat. Vern has a man-crush on Segal. Herc's a fourteen year old girl. etc.) There is no thought involved, just a reaction to other reactions. Which unfortunately seems to be the jist of most TBs - not that I mind, if they are amusing - but sometimes I feel bad for the people who most likely work hard to get their point across in reviews and it gets lost in the kerfuffle...
That said, Midol Girl could use an editor :P˙ -
Jen may have been the intended protagonist, but he is ineffectual throughout most of the story. Kira carries him (and the movie) most of the way.
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Ha! Ain't dat da troot.
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in the Doomsday TB. He's such an offensive little prick.
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If you can, look me up in the Zone. I've got some info regarding said matter which I don't want to share here.
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She's going to blog to clear it up soon. Someone photoshopped Seagal onto another image.
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not 14. also, mom of reviewers? ministry of manpower? message oriented middleware? my organic market?
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Chrth I am never going to see Neverending Story the same again. Must rewatch it. Haven't seen it in probably 15 years. Nosferatu she's probably never seen Wizard of Oz, she sounds like the type who does know film exosted before Star Wars. And besides when she said "The" (!) Gremlins was 1985 she lost all credability with me.
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I'm hilrarious.
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Dec 07, 2007 9:38:11 AM CST
i only get sweaty after wrestling alligators or pumping train ca
by occula
jarv, that's actually quite decent of you to say this place needs more female reviewers now and then. quite decent, sir. if i get off my ass and get into some screenings once in a damned while, i'll try (i used to run screenings for sony back in teh day and it left a sour taste for advance!)
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I get sweaty wrestling train cars and pumping alligators.\
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and I can only say that it was a complete mess. All the actors did well apart from the little girl. The effects were dodgy, polar bears were good in some places. The Bear fight and end battle is just boring.
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Sigh, women wrestling alligators! if we watch this long enough we may get to see some titties! (sad geeky paraphrase)Aesthicity, M-O-M= Memories-of-murder, by far the most obnoxious condescending, arrogant little toad to be populating the rabid boards of AICN. Look him up. He's a hypocritical little cunt.
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It would be one thing if the stupid, sexist, childish "jokes" you dipshits are making were funny, but they read like the flacid attempts at humor of a 9 year old. Midol Girl gave a good review, and though I don't whole heartedly agree with her estimation of the dearth of female role models in Sci Fi and Fantasy, her stuff is easily as readable as anyone else's on this site. Withthe exception of the masta, Wyrm. End of line.
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Seriously getting loads of emails asking about this film. Your Daemon Ltd is nothing to do with the picture. Sorry to disappoint. Give us a shjout if you want tax returns done, or need to raise some film finance, but no, we can't make you a Daemon, or sell you toys so stop asking already! http://www.yourdaemon.com
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We need some women who are respectful, compliant, and appreciative - The way a woman should be. Thank God for Cohagen.
Seriously, I've met way too many sarcstic and cynical women (Janeane Garafalo clones) to wonder if there are any unique women with actual identities of their own left in this world. Word. -
Dec 07, 2007 3:38:28 PM CST
Great. Time for Talkbackers to devolve into bigger pervs...
by kal reeve
then they already are. Every time this woman writes a review some of you begin acting like a bunch of demented apes. Show some manners and keep your lust in check.
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she writes the most empty reviews on this site
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I mean seriously, you took the time to log on this site, and you're criticizing the talkbackers' perversions?
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I have a hard time making it through a Harry review because of the stomach-turning filth he pollutes it with.
His most recent review that everyone's quoting now is particulary sleezy. But I notice that many of the talkbackers who criticize him for such content often make the same kind of low brow remarks. -
I really don't understand why they couldn't spend 20 more minutes wrapping up the ending of the first book so they could start the second movie the way the second book started. Crazy!
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after watching that, I felt like punching a ten year old girl again.
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Iorek got the biggest reaction out of a crowd that I've seen since Aragorn cuts the head off of the main Uruk Hai in LotR. I'm for serious. This flick is hard to sit through unless you've got the patience for the clumsy setup the screenwriter chose over the book's elegant beginning to the story. Around minute thirty or so...right around Lee Scoresby's entrance...The film begins taking asses and kicking names all over the place. My name is all the way kicked right into my ass.Iorek is a badass.*SPOILER*The fight is not as bloody as the book. But he DOES slap that fucking bear's face off with a mighty paw, then rip out his throat, breaking his neck. These kids clapped and cheered and were actually applauding when Lyra would bald-faced lie to everyone and be a badass little demon-seed, this is definitely a girl-power flick which doesn't take the time to make boys look the fool or kick grown men in the nuts, like one of the Olsen Twins flicks, you know?Two thumbs up.
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The Journey of Natty Gann...Shit, man, was I the only one who saw that shit? Bad ass cross-country story...cool dog...good shit.What about fucking She-Ra? She had her own animated movie, y'all.Uh..80s heroines? Annie: The Musical..she stomps the SHIT out of Tim Curry's foot AND Carol Burnett's foot, while singing and reforming that robber baron into a man with a heart of gold! Foot FUCKERY ABOUNDS!More 80s flicks for chicks...little baby chicks? Hmmm...Goonies was for the lads, but come on, Princess Leia kicks ass in both Empire AND Jedi. Even in Star Wars she's a spitfire!Oh! Oh! What about Night of the Comet!? Fucking bad ass mallrat girls with Uzis killing zombies!! Two female leads in that one!Morgan Stewart's Coming Home...Jon Cryer's female lead was just as badass as him...Breakfast Club abounds with chicks!Genre type stuff? Yeah, I'm having a hard time here...More later.
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Star Wars had Princess Leia, a wry, wisecracking Princess who didn't need saving.Uh..Buttercup is pretty bad-ass in the Princess Bride.Gertie was a doll in the E.T. movie, and was just awesome..brilliant acting from a wee lil Drew Barrymore.The Outsiders is a guy flick, made for adolescent boys by S.E. Hinton...a lady.In the Dark Crystal, the female gelfling is also good.What about Legend? The chick in that one seems to have a story, too.Someone said Labyrinth, and I'd like to add MirrorMask to that list of 'female leads that don't embarass females'.
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Why do you think impressng a woman would be the only reason a guy would take issue with perverted comments? Maybe I think a woman should be able to come on this site and not be sexually harassed. And you don't have to be a woman to be offended by the comments that have been made toward the reviewer. We should expect better of ourselves.
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What saddens me is that when reading these books, just like when watching an episode of Heroes, I get the sense of great potential simmering and sometimes boiling under a sugar-coated surface. The Golden Compass was a BIG opportunity to accomplish more than excellent storytelling, but actually OPEN PEOPLE'S MINDS, and the filmmakers have completely missed the mark.
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Every woman I've talked to dislikes Jennifer Connely's Sarah. Even Jennifer herself hated the way she played Sarah. So why do I as a man like her so much? I think women hate her because she is such a spot-on rendition of an attractive but socially stunted young woman and is too realistic for comfort.
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