I am – Hercules!!


My ardor for “Heroes” continues to wane!

It is spinning its wheels and needs to find traction fast!

PETER. Beaten by Irishmen who want iPods. Sponge-bathed by Caitlin. Discovers he can heal. Discovers he can phase. Saves Caitlin from gangster’s son. Won’t get his driver’s license back unless he helps with a robbery. Why not just zap the guy until he gives you what you want?

CLAIRE. Loses her new Nissan (so peeping flying-boy can retrieve it?). She is also much more shocked than the viewers when her toe grows back.

NOAH. Has one of eight Isaac paintings and will search for the missing seven. Why is he working that stupid CopyKingdom job? Does he need that big CopyKingdom salary so he can give Claire the flashy Nissan? Is threatening his CopyKingdom boss the best possible way to lay low?

MATT. Investigates Nakamura’s murder. Brings in Angela Petrelli for questioning.

ANGELA. “We did something terrible and now someone wants revenge,” thinks Mama Petrelli just before something scratches her bloody inside an interrogation room. We kinda figured that out last week.

NATHAN. Still has a giant beard.

HIRO. Impersonates Kensei and saves the princess. Learns Kensei can do the cheerleader’s trick. Hiro couldn’t save his girlfriend/waitress but now he can alter and re-alter history? Since your powers are obviously firing on all cylinders, shouldn’t he maybe get back to the future in case the forces of good need help with Sylar?

MOHINDER. Cures the virus-stricken Haitian. He and Noah and the Haitian are all working together now. Quite the meh reveal!

MAYA & ALEJANDRO. Maya can cry deadly black tears; her brother can make them evaporate. “We are going to America to find a real doctor.” You and your brother and your superpower are boring.

Remember how great the episode-ending cliffhangers were last season?

Betcha Sylar works for the good guys this year. Tonight’s installment:

2.3 "KINDRED" - Oct. 8
BOTH IN PAST AND PRESENT, SEVERAL HEROES MAKE SHOCKING DISCOVERIES -- NIKI AND MICAH RETURN -- Upon his return to New York, Suresh (Sendhil Ramamurthy) is unnerved to find an undiscovered Issac Mendez painting that foretells death of someone close to him. Both Claire (Hayden Panettiere) and H.R.G. (Jack Coleman) pursue their own secret personal agendas. Determined to make it to the U.S., Maya (Dania Ramirez) uses her deadly abilities to free Alejandro (Shalim Ortiz) from a Mexican jail. Ando (James Kyson Lee) returns to his job in Japan and makes a happy discovery. Meanwhile, in Japan's past, just when Hiro (Masi Oka) had written off Kensei (David Anders), his childhood hero surprises him. Niki (Ali Larter) and Micah (Noah Gray-Cabey) leave Las Vegas in an attempt to start over. Later, Niki and a lost Hero individually strike shady bargains to reach their goals. Two familiar people with abilities make an unexpected return. Dana Davis, Noah Gray-Cabey, Greg Grunberg, Adrian Pasdar, Zachary Quinto, Milo Ventimiglia also star. Nick D'Agosto, Katie Carr, Ashley Crow, Cristine Rose, Barry Shabaka Henley, Dominic Keating, Holt McCallany, Eriko Tamura, Adair Tishler and Stephen Tobolowsky guest star.

9 p.m. Monday. NBC.

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