Hey, everyone. ”Moriarty” here. I’d say there’s a lot of expectation placed on this film right now. Neil Marshall has been “the next big thing” for a while now. THE DESCENT and DOG SOLDIERS both garnered some pretty effusive praise, but neither one was a breakout hit for him. He’s got the goods as a filmmaker... I think that’s obvious by now... but he hasn’t put it together 100% yet and made that movie that really cemented his place. Is this one going to be it? Man, I hope so. And I know a lot of other people who are rooting for Marshall, too. Let’s see what our spy thought of it:
Hello all at AICN. I'm at work right now and feel the need to send this review over to you. Forgive me for all the grammatical errors, I'm rushing this one, but you'll get the jist of it. I recently saw an early screening for Neil Marshall's next film "DOOMSDAY". As a fan of Neil Marshall i was excited to see this movie. Dog Soldiers and The Descent kicked fuckin ass, so obviously Doomsday could do no wrong. Or could it? Heres the skinny…. THE MOVIE:The movie opens with a voiceover by Malcolm mcdowell giving the viewers a background about a virus that is killing off most of Scotland and English bordering countries in the spring 2008.we see images of people decaying and dropping dead in the streets. to avoid the spread of infection, a wall is created at the London/ Scotland border which quarantines Scotland in its entirety.the people are forced back into Scotland through the doors or shot dead by soliders. Once welded shut, there is no escape for the infected and for the innocent. Everyone is forced to live amongst themselves in chaos until everyone kills each other or dies from the illness. One mother manages to give her small daughter to a group of soldiers and fly her out via helicopter. Skip to 2033. The virus returns in London. We also find out that for the last 3 years, there is new community of people or survivers living in Scotland. Long story short, there seems that there might be a cure for the infection over the wall. The hierarchy and General Bill Nelson (Bob Hoskins) recruit a kick ass soldier , Major Sinclair, well played by hottie Rhona Mitra and who was once that little girl who escaped the quarantine, to gather a team and locate Dr. Kane (Malcolm McDowell) and bring home the cure. The problem is that for the last 25 years, no one knows what or who's over the wall. Sinclair and her team head through the gates in armored tanks filled with the latest futuristic equipment. Once settled, they head out to investigate an old run down hospital hoping to find the cure. The place seems desolate, nobody in sight. The team spread out. They all end up not finding any further clue and leave. All of a sudden angry punk-like natives appear from every direction. They rush the team with homemade weapons and are out for bloodl. The team head back to the vehicles when seriously, half the team is killed. Sinclair is captured and brought to Sol, the leader of the people. 2 other teammates escape. Sinclair is hung up by chains in a cell and interrogated by Sol, a Mohawk headed, Scottish, punk leader not only interested in what Sinclair can tell him as to why they are there but to eventually cook her and eat her. Seems all the locals are cannibals. In the corner of the room is a gimp in full black zippered s&m ghettup chained to the cell wall. Sinclair tells Sol nothing and after getting punched in the stomach a full 5 times she passes out. Sol and his group of primitives leave the cell and go celebrate. We're in an arena, with a stage. Sol gets on stage to modern music classics and seems to have a concert celebration. People cheering, dancing, and raving with glowsticks? He gives a speech that describes how they are going to eat their captives and everyone cheers. One of Sinclair's team is brought out to the crowd, strung up on a post and ready to die. They light him on fire, and the crowd devours his cooked body. Sinclair awakes, picks her locks, and escapes. She has a sword fight with Sol's leading lady, chops off her head, and leaves, when someone screams for her out from another cell. Its Sol's sister, also the daughter of Dr. Kane. She tells Sinclair she can take her to her father. Sinclair agrees , they leave. The two prisoners meet up with the other group members and head towards the great doctor. The natives are hot on their tail, lead by Sol driving a beat up school bus. They manage to get on a train and escape. After traveling through the country side which is actually quite beautiful their ride is over. They head into the woods in the direction of Dr. Kane. All of a sudden we see knights in shining armor on horseback galloping through the forest. It's Dr. Kane's henchmen and executioner. They capture Sinclair and her team and take them to the doctor. The team is brought to a large castle in the countryside. The community within its walls are medieval. knights, peasants, weapons, and the king, or Dr. Kane for that matter. Sinclair is once again interrogated by the doctor. He doesn't want to help her or her team. He's bitter about being left behind to die in the first place. He tells her that after everyone with the virus died off the best of the best survived and reproduced becoming immune to the disease and starting a new life an old fashioned kind of way, hence all the knights and armor and swords etc…. He doesn't help her but instead throws her in a cell with his daughter and the rest of the group. Sinclair is called to meet her doom. Shes pulled from the cell and thrown outside in a gladiator ring to battle the king's executioner. People watch from above the ring, cheering. Obviously Sinclair wins the fight and escapes…again. They all rush out the castle but unfortunately another group member played by Adrian Lester gets shot by arrows and falls down dead. Her and her remaining teammate along with Dr. Kane's daughter escape to some kind of abandoned warehouse. There they open a trailer to find a sparkling new working Bentley. They also open brand new boxes of cell phones, grab one, get in the car and hall ass out onto a highway. Speeding over a bridge and on their way home, they realize they are now being tracked by Sol and his fellow punk rockers. Anarchy ensues all over again. We head into a mad max road warrior chase down complete with speeding, ramming, cars flipping over, explosions, people getting run over, guns, even the gimp is strapped to a board grunting for pain. Sol hops out of his vehicle and onto the Bentley. For about 10 minutes we see him trying to choke Sinclair in the passenger seat, while another punk anarchist is trying to steer the car off the road from the other side. A bus stops in the middle of the road ahead. They have no other choice but to drive right through it. Sol's head gets decapitated. We see his screaming head fly towards camera. This is supposed to be funny. Sinclair uses her new cell phone to call headquarters. The general takes a helicopter and lands in a safe spot to meet Sinclair and get his cure, which, confusingly is Dr. Kane's daughter, who is now immune to the virus. I know I was confused as well. Sinclair decides she wants to go back to her old home and reminisce about her mother she once knew when she was a little girl. Bob Hoskins shows up and tells her it's ok and to come back with him, she refuses, therefore he then says goodbye and she stays in Scotland to roam the land. The End. CRITIQUE: I knew I was going into this movie knowing that I would love it, or at least like it. What I got was something else. What I watched was this silly, far fetched, horribly paced apocalyptic disaster. Now I know this was only a test screening and not a completed picture. We all filled out the surveys at the end of the film and asked about what we thought etc.. but Neil Marshall people! C'mon! I like Neil Marshall's movies because of the lack of bullshit in them. So why in hell, is there more bullshit in this movie to last a lifetime? I have no answer. I'm not sure how much studio influence is to blame here. I mean Mr. Marshall wrote this thing also. Yes, it was a different take on these kinds of films, whether it be the Mad Max trilogy, 28 Days/Weeks Later films, or even Escape From New York, but Doomsday just didn't do any kind of justice to itself or even to a modern take on the classics. The story was too slow in spots and too fast in others. A re-cut should fix this, but it won't fix the far fetched storyline. It became laughable at times. It was like 6 movies in one and you didn't know what kind of movie you were watching. The whole knights in shining armor was just ridiculous. The character of Sinclair looking like one of the chicks from The Descent in black spandex battling a 7 ft armored executioner had me cracking up. I felt embarrassed. Then when they randomly stumbled upon the brand new and working might I add, Bentley using words like "looks good, I'll take it" has me looking for the exit to the theater. The movie had comedy in it. You were supposed to laugh at Sol sometimes, and his over the top nature, but why? There was so little comedy in this that I didn't understand why is was put there in the first place. Either they need to add more, or take all the comedic sections out, because they didn't work. The cast was basically miscast. Bob Hoskins as this general, or chief or whatever just didn't fit. Malcolm McDowell has the voice, the accent, and can play any kind of bad guy you want, but it's such a small role that it didn't matter who played it. What I'm trying to say I guess, is that besides Rhona Mitra, who had the sex appeal and believability as a kick ass soldier, everyone else in this movie stunk. Sinclair's whole team was filled with unknowns and then you have all these very small supporting roles played by movie stars. It felt strange, especially for a Neil Marshall film. Most of Sinclair's team had forgettable faces. Even the ones that made it to the end of the movie without being killed off I forgot about as soon as the credits rolled. The character of Sol was decent played by Craig Conway. He played it very over the top and insanely off beat compared to his work in Dog Soldiers and The Descent. It was the star power used in this movie that was unnecessary and ineffective. It would have been better to just use unknowns throughout this film. It didn't hurt The Descent did it? No. The score was a mixture of sorts. It reminded me of eerie sci-fi classics like Blade Runner or when used dramatically it sounded like an old episode of 21 Jump Street with 80's synths and droning pianos. The only thing that bothered me was during action and climactic sequences they used music from 28 Weeks Later and, I swear I heard score pieces from Last of The Mohicans in there. Again, this is a test screening so hopefully the score will be re-treated and mixed. I'm not sure who scored the film as I'm writing this. The special effects and gore were one of the only good things about this film. You have to hand it to Neil Marshall. The guy knows how to kill someone on screen. Whether it's eating someone flesh, chopping off someone's head, or blowing the shit out of a character, this guy knows how to do it. Some audience members said it was too gory at times but I disagree. It was spot on. And if you don't take the story too seriously while watching this film, then the gore can actually be your safety net to surviving it. Unfortunately I have to get back to work. I hope my two cents on this movie will give at least one person an idea of what they might be in for come Doomsday's release date. I myself, will be there again with my fingers crossed hoping somebody out there took the time to refine the shit out of it, because God knows it needs it. Call Me THE SICK KID
