I am – Hercules!!
Not to be confused with the 1975 Robert Altman movie, Fox’s “Nashville” is the new reality series from the producers behind the mammoth MTV hit “Laguna Beach.”
The new show is about a gaggle of dull twentysomethings (one of them the daughter of dull, cliché-spouting Fox sportscaster Terry Bradshaw) who come to the land of the Grand Old Opry in an effort to evolve into the next Faith Hill or Garth Brooks.
Viewers willing to abide bland country-pop spewing from the mouths of vacant young blondes and brunettes may enjoy this series more than those who cannot; these pretty kids find many an opportunity to pick up a guitar and treat the show’s microphones to eardrum-dulling vocals at parties and on stages and on the stoops of their apartment buildings.
Better unscripted fare benefits from documenting the activities of subjects 24 hours a day for weeks or months. As with “Laguna Beach,” watching “Nashville” is like watching “The Real World” in slow-motion. It’s maddening lazy and inorganic, wrung free of any reasonable expectation of surprise or spontaneity because it surrrendered control from the get-go to its narcissistic stars.
Too many scenes seem to begin with an off-screen call to the show’s producers. Something akin to, “We’re ready to make up a scene for y’all. Y’all want to meet us at Clint’s stable?” What the viewers get left with are a lot of amateur actors stammering through their own poorly conceived mental scripts.
But, again, “Laguna Beach” was a huge hit, so what matters Herc’s opinion?
The New York Times says:
… The performances, the mise-en-scène and the use of sound and music in these magical-reality documentaries represent an effective appropriation of the style of Antonioni. … As a self-aware show, perhaps too self-aware, “Nashville” attends closely to the money-country nexus, mindful that it’s not your daddy’s, nor Robert Altman’s, “Nashville.” In fact “Nashville” makes a theme of its inauthenticity, and the collision — let’s say it’s between starlets and coal miner’s daughters — in the premiere. Thereby, suspense is built. …
The Los Angeles Times says:
… there's barely any anticipation here -- "Nashville" always tips its hand. Will Chuck's showcase be a success? Will Mika hook up with Clint? Will Rachel protest those who dismiss her based on her family? (She is, conveniently, the daughter of former NFL great and Fox football commentator Terry Bradshaw.) Of course. Of course. Of course.…
The Chicago Tribune says:
… brought back traumatic memories of “The Princes of Malibu,” a short-lived Fox reality show that seemed to exist entirely to pimp the band of one of the overprivileged, hunky-but-brainless yahoos on the show. … It all seems painfully staged and contrived, but take heart: Given that this is a show on Fox’s failure-prone Friday nights, I can’t imagine “Nashville” clogging up the airwaves for long.
The Washington Post says:
… All the slick production values and some decent music in "Nashville" can't make up for these one-dimensional subjects, and their angst over their fledgling careers grows tiresome. Based on the pilot episode, only 28-year-old Chuck Wicks seems destined for a record contract. Still, he's boring and brooding, and we can only hope he breaks out of his funk before too long. …
The Seattle Post-Intelligencer says:
… it takes a while to connect to these characters, and those who show up might not be willing to stick around until the melodrama kicks in. Going down home with a docu-soap might not be enough to keep potential viewers at home on a night that's notoriously hard to sell, and though the "Nashville" cast may have more similarities to common folk, the rich kids already may have saturated that corner of the market.
The Pittsburgh Post-Gazette says:
… The fakeness of "Nashville" is astounding. Not only does singer Matt give Mika a tour of the Grand Ol' Opry -- the auditorium just happened to be open? -- but two heart-to-heart talks require characters to walk to the middle of bridges spanning the Cumberland River with the city skyline in the background. In a scripted drama, picturesque settings aren't a distraction, but on a supposed reality series, it shows just how staged the production is.
The Milsaukee Journal-Sentinel says:
… surprisingly absorbing … It's much more engaging than it sounds, thanks to ultraslick reality-soap packaging …
The Miami Herald says:
… practically every note except the ones they sing rings false. The show's dialogue feels scripted, its frequent hookups and breakups abrupt and phony, and its scenes from the music business out and out fraudulent. …
The Orlando Sentinel says:
… is described as a docu-soap. Docu-slop is more appropriate. … follows some attractive people who are trying to become country-music stars. They might be easier to watch if they weren't always aware of the camera and playing to it. What we have here is stilted steaminess. … If you feel like you're being played, well, then you'll understand why "Nashville" feels like a bad country song. The title of that song: "Shameless."
The Boston Herald gives it a D-minus and says:
Hum every country music cliche you can think of and you still won’t come close to hitting the stereotypes on display … They don’t even believe in what they are doing. Neither should you.
The Boston Globe says:
… pretty doggone dull. The bottom line: Beautiful plastic people pretending to have hearts are a lot less entertaining outside the borders of California. … But anyone who has enjoyed TV's reality soap genre is probably already down with the fakeness and contrivance. What they won't appreciate are the presence of sincere aspirations, which are about as scandalous and dishy as a cold shower.
The Hollywood Reporter says:
… makes for bracing -- though obviously not necessarily more honest -- docu-soap viewing. But it's clear that this new Fox original series has its class act together …
Variety says:
… a flat note for Fox … show is as directionless as its stars … For about three or so minutes in the seemingly endless debut episode, there is some very real, rather tense talk about the reality of Nashville. Two managers have received the go-ahead from some label bigwigs to stage a showcase. As they explain, 95% of the performers in Nashville never get to this stage, and of those that do, 90% of them are told no. There is actual, visceral tension here. … The show's producers have little interest in showing what it takes to become a star, especially when they have footage of a girl believing she was dissed by a boy. …
9 p.m. Friday. Fox.
But if you can’t wait till Friday night, you can watch it now on Fox.com, IGN.com, TV.com, Comcast.net, AOL.com and TVGuide.com.
