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Massawyrm, On The Other Hand, Really Enjoyed HALLOWEEN!!

Hola all. Massawyrm here. I love KC and the Sunshine Band. They made a number of really catchy songs that I love for the kitsch value - you know, the kind of thing you throw on and throw down to with your friends when no one is being even a lick of serious. And no one but friends are around. One of their better songs is a little ditty called "I'm Your Boogie Man." It's a fun little piece of nostalgia about being a great dancing partner. But then Rob Zombie came along. And he just had to remake the thing. So what did he do? He completely reworked the song to sound like it was about being some kind of fucking monster. And you know what? God damnit I love that fucking song. That's the version I put on when I actually want to rock out. A good remake is exactly like a good cover song. I takes everything that was good about the original and completely reworks it. Makes it different. It takes familiar elements but looks at them through a new pair of eyes. Rob Zombie didn't rewrite the lyrics or the fundamental music to The Sunshine Band's version. And he certainly didn't take everyone else's copies of the original away so that his was the only version in existence. He just played it differently, making a song that exists for a completely different reason. Now there are two versions, each the same and yet functionally different. By now you should know where I'm going with this. I love Rob Zombie. The guy is a remarkably unique voice in filmed horror. Love him or hate him he's trying some very different things, and slowly but surely he's pulling himself out of his heavy borrowing from other filmmakers and getting more and more distinct with every film. I find him a fascinating director because I know that every time I sit down to watch one of his movies he is going to show me something I've never seen before. And Halloween is no different. There already has been and there no doubt will continue to be a lot of hullabaloo over the changes he's made. Zombie's changed this and he's decided to do that. Most of all, people have been bitching about canon and mythology. Now I know I'm big into that kind of stuff my own self. But there are occasions when you can't really turn to a canon or mythology argument – and Michaels Myers is one of them. There are two reasons for that. The first requires me to ask you this: Which mythology are you talking about? When it comes to Myers, where do you draw the line? Which Michael Myers mythos do you subscribe to? Does it end with the first Halloween or do you draw the line at the point that Carpenter left? Are you like me and the series ends when that mystery man frees Michael from that jail cell at the end of part 5? Or are you completely insane and subscribe to that whole he's a genetic experiment to make evil bullshit that we were given when Dimension took the reins. Or in your head does he die like a punk ass bitch at the end of the one they made when Hollywood had a huge hard on for Kevin Williamson and expanded his crappy 20 page treatment, trying to keep every little scrap of English he wrote onto those pages? Do I even need to ask how Busta Rhymes fits in? Really. Honestly. Your version of Michael Myers ends when the movies begin to get shitty in your estimation. Which leads us to reason two: Michael Myers doesn't belong to John Carpenter anymore. He belongs to us. All of us. To an entire generation. Myers, Krueger, Voorhees. They're our Universal Monsters. Our Wolf Man, Frankenstein and Dracula. How many functionally different versions of Dracula are there out there? How about of the Wolf Man? Of Frankenstein? And how many of them even resemble the original source material upon which they're based? Welcome to the era when we begin to reinvent our Universal Monsters. And like the Universal Monsters, there are certain details that are essential to ensure the monster is recognizable. The rest is what decides whether or not that version is a good movie. So is it? Is this Halloween a good riff on the story, the myth, the legend that is Michael Myers? I was sure as hell pleased. Mostly because like "I'm Your Boogie Man" Zombie put his distinctive touch on it, but more importantly gave me something I had never seen before. In fact, I almost wish this weren't called Halloween. Not because I don't think it's worthy of the name, but because, like Dawn of the Dead before it, it comes with too much baggage. It's the same story, but told in such a radically different way that it really becomes a completely different film. And what it has to offer is original, frightening and deliciously fucked up. But if you spend the whole movie comparing it to the original or trying to reconcile it with previous mythology, you're going to miss what's so great about this one. You have never seen 10 year-old do what you are about to watch a 10 year-old do. Zombie doesn't in any way try to recreate Carpenter's brilliant POV murder scene. Instead, he presents to you a murder spree worthy of the legend of Michael Myers – a set up and delivery that people would definitely talk about in a town for two decades. The type of murders that lead to legends and abandoned houses and queer looks at the mere mention of a name. It's pretty brutal stuff very much in the vein of what you expect from Zombie. And as you watch that 10 year-old grow up in a mental institution, you watch his slow, gradual transformation into the Michael Myers of your nightmare. Forget the fact that his origin is different, that the story that gets you to Haddonfield on Halloween Night is told and paced differently. What really matters is once you've gotten there, once you've seen what Zombie tells us created his Michael Myers, the guy standing in front of you wearing that mask and wielding that butcher knife? That guy is Michael Fucking Myers. No doubt about that. He is cold, methodical, ruthless and unstoppable. He shows no emotion. He spares no one. All this bullshit you're hearing about sympathizing with Michael Myers – it's all just that. Bullshit. You don't feel for him. You might understand what made him, but you don't sympathize with him. The guys a fucking monster. No heart, no soul. Just evil with a mask and a knife. And he carves out a murder spree of legend. Zombie puts all of his trademark flourishes on this. Rather than setting the origin of Myers in Suburbia, it falls more in a drunken redneck hell just this side of the trailer park. Then, once we do get to the suburbs, it's hyper sexualized with enough naked cheerleaders and daddy's girls to get even a eunuch aroused. And every bit of violence is brutal. Zombie has a way of making some classic, been-there-done-that kills just plain hurt. He never has to resort to gimmicky death scenes. Butcher knife, baseball bat and bare hands. That's all Myers needs. And it still gets you. Do I love this more than the original? Oh God no. Carpenter fucking rules. But I will say I like this mythology better than anything presented beyond the first film, and that I like this one a lot more than I like ANY of the sequels. I think it's a fine retelling of the story and that it has a lot to offer those who long for something a little different. In fact the only scenes here that didn't work for me are the few that Zombie seems to crib almost entirely from Carpenter. There are three sequences in particular that feel like they belong in the original rather than here. And I like Carpenter's take on those better. But every place Zombie differs is a pretty great new story, one I immediately fell in love with. I think – no fuck that – I KNOW that this one is going to divide people. Purists are gonna howl about canon, and the snarkier out there are gonna try and pin this as an abused child story (it isn't.) But what it all comes down to is: what do you want in a remake? If you hate the very idea of a remake or long for a remake that is updated but unchanged, this is gonna piss you right the hell off. Personally I don't think this is in any way a violation. The corpse of Michael Myers has been desecrated several times by my count, and Zombie appears to be trying to restore some dignity to it. I for one think he succeeded. But I can only Recommend this to those seeking a new take on the story. Those who are open-minded about remakes or relatively unattached to the mythos of Myers will find a wonderfully disturbing horror film here. Until next time friends, smoke ‘em if ya got ‘em. Massawyrm
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Readers Talkback
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  • Aug. 31, 2007, 11:22 a.m. CST

    Kinda what I thought

    by The Pusher

    Both reviews pretty much tell me all I need to know. The good, the bad. I guess I'll find out for myself tomorrow.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 11:24 a.m. CST


    by Birdys Piano Teacher

    Maybe on DVD.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 11:27 a.m. CST

    Hell yeah

    by kilik777

    Great review as always. Im looking forward to seeing and I totally agree with your take on the mythology. The only thing i would disagree is about the 2nd film. I think I liked it almost as much as the first.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 11:29 a.m. CST

    not last! - and thank you

    by darthnoodle

    i'm about to go see this and i like what you have to say. i like his other two movies and i'm hoping this lives up to my own expectations of a fun, intense rob zombie movie.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 11:30 a.m. CST

    What do we want in a remake?

    by Carnotaur3

    How about some horror. THE THING is a perfect example of brilliantly staged horror and it's much better executed than Carpenter's Halloween, mostly because Carpenter had gotten better.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 11:30 a.m. CST


    by datachasm

    when is Carpenter's next movie?

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 11:35 a.m. CST

    Right On!!!!

    by Timpson

    This is it, what a "review". you said it perfectly. Thank You.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 11:45 a.m. CST

    Well, that's it Massa

    by zikade zarathos

    This is like saying you're a card carrying member of NAMBLA. Yes, people, THIS MOVIE IS THAT BAD.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 11:46 a.m. CST

    But is it scary?

    by Lando Griffin

    so far none of the reviews have touched upon that

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 11:46 a.m. CST

    I love Rob Zombie

    by TheLastAngryMan

    'The guy is a remarkably unique voice in filmed horror. Love him or hate him he's trying some very different things' No he's fucking not you prick, he's just one of many directors who have jumped on the gore and violence bandwagon which is polluting most horror films these days. There's too many idiots these days, like yourself, that think being grossed out by somthing is the same as being scared by somthing. It may make little girls scream, but that dosnt mean its even remotely scary, which is what horror films used to be about. Zombie's a hack, whore, shitbag and so are you.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 11:55 a.m. CST

    Jesus, Massa', comparing it to a fucking cover song....

    by Nice Marmot

    .... is just proving the opposition to this fucking piece of shit, myself included, CORRECT. I'm all for a good cover, performed live by a talented band. They rock. But when some desparate talentless hack band has to record a cover on their studio album and release it as a single, cause they know they it's their last album and they need to cash in, that's just lame. This analogy you've made just reminds us that Zombie's Halloween is a sad mistake. It also reminds me, at least, that his music is pretty crappy too.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 11:57 a.m. CST

    Of course he liked it. And Fran's NOT a cunt.

    by Darth Bauer


  • Aug. 31, 2007, 11:57 a.m. CST


    by MC-909

    "...jumped on the gore and violence bandwagon which is polluting most horror films these days" <p> What are these incredible horror films you speak of that have no gore or violence?

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 11:57 a.m. CST

    Great review, but...

    by Burgundy82

    Look, we all know Massa's one of the best reviewers on this site (the Boogie Man/Boogeyman intro was pretty damn clever), but even he can't convince me about this one. "I KNOW this one is going to divide people."?? I hate to say it, Massa, but I'm not seeing much division so far.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 11:58 a.m. CST

    Goddamn this is a great review!!!!!!!!

    by The Real McClane

    Thanks brother, you put into words exactly what I've been thinking this entire time about the remake. Your ideas about Voorhees, Freddy, Leatherface and Myers being OUR generation's Universal Monsters is completely fascinating to me. I could not agree more. I'm the guy that's chomping at the bit for a new Friday the 13th. Bring it on!!!! <br><br>For Friday the 13th fans, by the way, this is always an interesting read:

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 12:03 p.m. CST

    RIGHT ON Massawyrm!!

    by zooch

    I love Michael Myers. If it's a good interesting take on Michael Myers, that's enough for me!Moriarty comes off sounding like a snob. Every character out there is subject for reinvention, they happen all the time, and if it's good, what's the big freakin deal?

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 12:03 p.m. CST


    by Boba Fat

    writes reactions not reviews. They're entertaining but I wouldn't gamble my ticket money on them.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 12:07 p.m. CST

    Well, someone's been smokin' 'em...

    by AssWhole

    How can one positive word be attached to this atrocious piece of shit? This film is worse than ALL of the sequels. It's worse than the Black Christmas remake. It's AWFUL! It is yet another installment in torture porn. Not one iota of this holy shit pile of doo is redeemable. And if Michael Myers "belongs to all of us" (what new agey horseshit is that anyway?), MY Michael Myers belongs 50 feet under the ground to stay, as worm food. NO MORE, Zombie, no more!!!

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 12:08 p.m. CST

    First sign of the apocalypse! I agree with Massawyrm!

    by DerLanghaarige

    And to make it worse: I even READ his review!

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 12:19 p.m. CST

    I have to admit..

    by Burgundy82

    I just read the full synopsis on The Movie Spoiler, and the damn thing actually sounds pretty good to me. Dude made A LOT of changes. Maybe I'll check it out after all. Still not vouching for that "Love Hurts" scene, though

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 12:27 p.m. CST

    I hate the Halloween sequels, but enjoy the original...

    by DanielKurland

    Bringing up that the sequels are garbage and change the mythos doesn't really defend this movie I don't think, as everyone seems to just be comparing it to the original. I even like the idea of the second Halloween where it takes place IMMEDIATELY where the first ends, and is just trying to catch up with Myers, in spite of it all being a little implausible.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 12:30 p.m. CST

    The only reviewer I respect here

    by Trazadone

    Excellent, I'll be checking this out tonight.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 12:30 p.m. CST


    by DanielKurland

    " watch his slow, gradual transformation into the Michael Myers of your nightmare." The point was supposed to be that Myers was just fucked up to begin with, not that being in an institution, alone for 15 years made him crazy. That would make anyone crazy, let alone someone who grew up in an abusive home.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 12:31 p.m. CST

    And the Rob Zombie flop sweat choir praises you

    by reflecto

    Nice job Massa. You can count on them doing your laundry for you for the next six months while they compulsively thank you.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 12:31 p.m. CST

    Fair enough mc909

    by TheLastAngryMan

    Excessive gore and violence is what i meant. Sadism, torture, brutal rape, basically the kind of things that make pin head children like yourself whoop with delight, but dont make a decent horror film. I'le take the origional Halloween, Blar witch or The Fog (again, the origional, not the turd remake released a couple of years back) over Hostel, Devils Rejects or Zombie's Halloween abortion any day.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 12:31 p.m. CST

    The big question is...

    by thenatureboy

    Are Danielle Harris' tits nearly as nice as PJ Soles'?

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 12:43 p.m. CST

    K.C. and the Sunshine Band? AWWWRRIiiiightt !

    by Pound Sand

    Instead of the famous Carpenter synth score, they should just play Shake Shake Shake, Shake Shake Shake, Shake your Booty, Shake your BOOTY when Micheal goes a-stalking.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 12:43 p.m. CST


    by TheDohDoh

    Now that's what I'm talking about!!! Give Zombie his props for resurrecting a dead franchise and showing us STUFF WE'VE NEVER BEFORE SEEN IN HORROR. Moreover, go see this fucker.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 12:53 p.m. CST

    Massa misses the point of sequels vs. remakes

    by TVguy4566

    Sequels are just moneymakers and they need to throw in new twists to build on the legacy to hide what they are - inferior, crappy carbon copies of the orginal (at least 9 times out of 10). They did this with the Nightmare movies too. <br><br> I expect more out of remakes. For the most part, the recent trend of horror remakes haven't been just make a weak carbon copy of the original and capitalize it to make money. There have been some (The Fog, Black Christmas), but for the most part they are higher standard than the sequel fare and they pay tribute to the original, but not neccessarily follow the same exact story (Dawn of the Dead, The Hills Have Eyes, and even the Texas Chainsaw Masacre). I think comparing this movie to the sequels, that had less to do with actual plot and characterization than new and different ways to kill people to sell tickets, is setting the bar too low. <br><br> I do agree with Massa that Zombie probably shouldn't have made this movie named Halloween. Every negative review I have seen does compare it to the original in how Zombie missed the point at least on certain elements. That means that instead of watching this movie for what it is, everyone is watching it with a critical eye to begin with. I still don't get Zombie's point in doing this.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 12:56 p.m. CST

    Massa, pure and simple, you're a phillistine

    by IndustryKiller!

    Anyone remember his The Holiday review? Right there is enough evidence to damn his opinion forever. The guy likes crap. Part of of the problem with this review is he describes the events in the film and smugly talks as if its simply the changes that has been turning people off and will divide them forever. This folks, is ridiculous. It's not the events int he film in and of themselves,it's that these events are done so poorly, written so badly, so soullessly, and acted so wretched that if you can enjoy them you're just not on the level. No one would have cared about showing Myers time in the asylum if it had been done with any degree of originality or soul, instead we get as by-the-numbers a backstory as one could possibly have. Combine that with terrible and worse yet, unlikeably dull, performances all around, and a completely atmosphereless town and you have a film that will go down int eh record books as total shit. There is no division here Massawyrm. People with anything resembling discerning taste hate it, those who have none think....well they dont really think about anything, they write reviews like this.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 1:01 p.m. CST

    Is it me or...

    by Cellar Door

    ...does it sound like Zombie might be better off in cinematography instead of direction? Story-wise I haven't been to impressed by his stuff but admittedly haven't seen all of it so can't say for sure. He definitely has an eye for grime though and seems to be able to establish an atmosphere. Direction-wise, it's hard to say but there's something incongruent to it regardless. So maybe his talents as a filmmaker are better suited to cinematography? Am I the only one who thinks this might be the case?

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 1:10 p.m. CST

    Nice review

    by skimn

    Vaguee McVaguerson. Your "review" was expressive and heartfelt, but it was so vague in regards to plot, casting, acting, know the things that make up a movie..No wonder MemoriesOfMurder prefers you.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 1:14 p.m. CST

    Yeah, as long as something we like has been shit on

    by Kraken

    in the past, it's okay to continue to do so. Just like AvP! Perfectly logical.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 1:28 p.m. CST


    by Mr. Nice Gaius

    How much did Memories-Of-Murder pay you to write this review?

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 1:31 p.m. CST

    Amen Brother...

    by theceure

    My thoughts exactly Massawyrm. The posers on this site worry me way more than Zombies directing skills. Devils and House of 1000 Corpses rules and so will Halloween.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 1:34 p.m. CST

    Massawyrm Gets It Right

    by User EGO

    He gets it right, while Quint and Mori missed the point.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 1:39 p.m. CST

    Good review Massa, even though I ccompletely disagree..

    by Lighthouse

    with it. I thought this movie was complete shit. I agree pretty much with everything Moriarty said.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 1:39 p.m. CST


    by skimn

    Amen brother.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 1:40 p.m. CST

    My two cents

    by Sheriff_Hoyt

    I was against the idea of remaking the original when I first heard about it. Then I heard that Rob Zombie, who entertained me with House Of 1000 Corpses, and REALLY entertained me with The Devil's Rejects was on board to direct. That made me 100% sure that I was going to give this a chance. I like a lot of Rob's ideas, and when I heard he was bringing a lot of them into his version of the film, it made me even more excited to see what he'd come up with. I'm going to see this on Sunday and I'll be doing it with an open mind. After reading enough about it I like the sound of what Rob is doing here with the "origin story" of the Michael Myers character. I'm not going in there expecting him to "top" Carpenter's classic which will not happen (it's my all-time favorite horror film) I'm going to see Rob Zombie's take on the origin of the character all the way through to the end of the original film. Nothing more, nothing less. People are getting way too bent out of shape about this. I can't imagine any of these people didn't read that Rob was doing his take on the origin of Michael Myers before seeing it, and I'd sure like to know how whatever his film does or doesn't do takes a single thing away from the original Halloween. I'll tell you what, NOTHING. The bottom line is I'm going into this looking for an origin story of a character I've grown up with for years and I have a feeling I'm gonna like it. Not ONE criticism I've heard about Rob's film so far makes me feel any differently.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 1:43 p.m. CST

    Rob Zombie prefers HD DVD and heres why

    by skimn

    ..nice grainy resolution..

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 1:49 p.m. CST

    What's wrong with Halloween II ?

    by zer0cool2k2

    It's pretty much just an extension of the first film. Sure it adds the whole Samhain element, and turns what was just a random stalking/attempted murder into a kill-my-sister story, but still, that hot-tub nurse had an awesome rack!

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 2:02 p.m. CST


    by TheDohDoh

    His review is so filled with hate its's absurd. He's basically asking for Hollywood to never make another Michael Myers movie and that, my friends, aint gonna happen. It's time to move along to more erudite things than horror films Moriarty. Merchant Ivory is calling your name. I'm sticking with Michael Myers. This new film is fucking amazing.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 2:03 p.m. CST


    by TVguy4566

    The Samhein element was actually part of the original although they never spoke of it in the film, Carpenter said he used that idea for the basis of the original. As for the sister angle, Carpenter admits he came up with it while writing 2 in the morning with a six pack in him.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 2:06 p.m. CST

    Hey, someone stole Harry Duffell Bag full of cash!

    by C.K. Lamoo

    Could it have been Massawyrm?

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 2:21 p.m. CST

    Zombie = All Gore/No Scares

    by DirkAngerReloaded23

    Wha the fuck is it with horror directors nowadays thinking that just cause you can make a movie ridiculously bloody/gory/torture filled that that will ultimately make it scary? Anybody? Anybody? There is a HUGE difference between guys like Rob Zombie & Eli Roth, and old school John Carpenter & Wes Craven, and that difference is that the original Halloween & Nightmare on Elm Street, along with Friday the 13th, the Thing, etc, is that they were SCARY! There was actually this really old, almost mystically archain technique used back in the day by those directors that would help in this goal: BUILDING SOME ACTUAL TENSION WITH CHARACTERS THAT WE GIVE A SHIT ABOUT! Wow, what a concept! Buckets, upon buckets, upon bathtubs, upon cargo liners full of blood & gore do not a scary movie make if we don't give 2 fucks about the characters biting the bullet, and even then, try building some goddamn tension for once before you knock them off. Learn how to make us feel for the characters and not just make them some ancillary tool for some mysoginistic manics to knock off like they're swatting flies.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 2:23 p.m. CST

    I didn't have any problems with the changes

    by bluebottle

    I just didn't like it because it was so poorly made. Zombie is not that great of a filmmaker, which is fine when he's doing his own thing, but he should be kept away from movies that a lot of people might want to see.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 2:28 p.m. CST


    by TheDohDoh

    Anyone remember what song starts the theatrical version? In the work print it's Monster Mash, but they changed it for the theatrical. Not sure why. Obviously, if I can't remember it, it's not as good. Thanks dudes!! It's killing me trying to remember.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 2:33 p.m. CST

    Kevin Williamson treatment

    by Beldo84

    One quick thing...the final script to Halloween H20 was very different from Kevin Williamson's tiny treatment (not even sure it was a full 20 pages). In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if the writers didn't even glance at it. All they really had in common were "Michael Myers, Laurie Strode, boarding school."

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 2:45 p.m. CST

    Stuck in the middle with you...

    by The Dum Guy

    I'm not angry or happey with this film, I'm just so Meh. I liked it more than House OATC, but no where near as much as Devil's Rejects. I guess I agree with Massa, I think that after Carpenter's Halloween(s), this incarnation is the next best...<br><br>I really want to know if they'll keep this as the start of a new Myers mythos, or they'll just make another one and leave the origin background ambigious. You know there will be another one eventually.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 2:54 p.m. CST

    "But what it all comes down to is: ...

    by mbeemer

    what do you want in a remake?"<p><p> That assumes I want a remake in the first place.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 2:55 p.m. CST

    To be fair, there *were* some interesting behind H-VI..

    by Stalin vs Predator

    Both the wynn and the thorn are actual runes and Old English characters, both were transformed into phonemes used today, both had connotations with mythology and magic (then again, which rune didn't...) - and it all made an interesting tie to the mysterious appearance of Samhain's name all the way in H-II... and the druid magic in H-III. I've always said that the concept behind H-VI was an interesting and - at its beginning, that is - probably a rather well-thought and researched attempt to combine all the disjointed plots and ideas of all Halloweens into one solid mass. Of course it all degenerated into a nonsensical final product (Joe Chappelle is one mediocre director, but judging by the "producer's cut", the project derailed long before Chappelle signed on - he just set fire to it)... but the intentions behind H-VI were good. Let's honor them by adding them to the pavement in the courtyard of hell.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 2:59 p.m. CST

    Sleepy & making as much sense as H-VI the final cut...

    by Stalin vs Predator

    ...I do ask for an Edit option. Hey, after 10 years online, maybe it might make a nice innovation? I hear some sites, forums, etc. have started adding such a feature recently. Oh, by the way, someone file a complaint with Baron Samedi about this "zombie".

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 3:01 p.m. CST

    Excellent review, Massawyrm!

    by LoneGun

    Thoughtful, level-headed and objective. I'm going to see this movie in about one hour, so I'll find out soon if I feel the same way about it as you. But I think you've approached the film with a fair attitude. Interesting comments on the re-imagining of our horror icons.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 3:04 p.m. CST

    I think we are heading for the phase of Reset

    by theycallmemrglass

    Rather than sequeals. Batman Begins, JJ Abrams Star trek, Superman Returns (uh strike that last one). I'm all for it and this Halloween sounds like a good 'un. Am I the only one who ennjoyed Halloween 3 btw ??

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 3:49 p.m. CST

    Just saw it..F'ing incredible!!

    by jojo-pimp

    Nothing will ever compare to the original in my eyes...but damn, this was just a great frickin movie all the way around!

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 3:58 p.m. CST

    Massa, you fucking rule.

    by SebastianHaff

    That is all.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 4:06 p.m. CST


    by Fireball XL-5

    Massa comes through again like a super hero, cutting through all the self-important bull and bringing things back down to earth. That whole opening riff on "Boogie Man" was brilliant, Massa. Thanks.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 4:06 p.m. CST

    "..a remarkably unique voice in filmed horror..."

    by Bob Cryptonight

    I agree with this...but unfortunately this "voice", like his music, is designed to appeal to the angry teen-age-boy-mentality, the old "I'm different and nobody likes me" crowd... He is really a very phoney, calculating "artist."

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 4:29 p.m. CST

    just saw this...

    by GavinVanDraven

    i really enjoyed the movie, but i didnt like the beginning. once meyers was an adult the film got alot better. making michael come from a fucked up childhood makes him less of a monster. of course, i understand... mommy is a stripper, sister is a slut and stepdad calls me names. thats motivation right there. i find hannibal rising to be weak in that aspect as well. it would have been better for meyers to not have killed because his life was fucked up, but rather (A).because one day he simply snapped. just some normal kid wakes up one morning and starts killing for no reason. or (B. he should have been a fucking mute for his whole life. just this catatonic kid who would sit in class and draw pictures of dead things. he should have been living in his own head the whole time. you dont have sympathy for those kinds of people. you know you're dealing with a monster there. no excuses, no reasoning, just evil. anyways... the second half of the movie rocks.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 4:32 p.m. CST

    Rob Zombie

    by Cleyu

    What a fucking stupid idea to remake Halloween...........did you really think it would work? You fucking moron.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 4:34 p.m. CST

    I agree, Zombie did great!!!!!

    by spideystreet

    Have to agree with Massa on this one. I just saw it today and though it was tough at times getting the original out of my head, Michael Myers extends beyond Carpenter and I think that's what Rob shows us with this one. Personally, there are flaws with each of the installments but where they go right more than makes up for them, that's why I love Halloween more than any other horror franchise. However, for me the only entries that exist are 1, 2, H20 and now this 2007 version. Just my opinion but that's why I think Massa is dead on with this review. I also thought the new "Chain saw" reimaginings were great too as well as the "Dawn of the Dead" remake. I think they all brought a worthy voice to an iconic film. I'm not big on the entire horror genre either, that's why certain entries of each horror icon really bugged me (i.e. any "Friday 13" after #3, every Freddy passed #1, and most Halloween entries. That said, had a great time and like it better the more it sits with me. Seeing it plenty while it's around. Would love to see an uncut version on dvd when it comes out. Thanks Massa, great review dude!

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 4:40 p.m. CST

    He put a Shatner mask on Leatherface.

    by Cleyu

    And bored people to death.....his best movie was 'Werewolf women of the ss' a film that was 2 minutes long.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 5:01 p.m. CST

    A)$25.00 a day

    by GavinVanDraven

    Q) How much money did nick castle make per day to play michael myers in the original movie

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 5:03 p.m. CST

    massa is an idiot.

    by lovethatjoker

    That review was shit.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 5:09 p.m. CST

    I prefer Myers in The Spy Who Shagged Me

    by spacechampion

    Yeah, baby! Yeah!

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 5:48 p.m. CST

    Dearest Robert Zombie,

    by Kingdaddy

    Did it feel good when you took one of the most beloved horror films in history and BALLS DEEP SKULL FUCKED IT INTO OBLIVION??? I just wasted $6.50 on your hack re-imagining of "Halloween". If I wanted to watch House of 1000 Corpses dipped in Devil's Rejects and covered with shit I'd rent "See No Evil" with Kane. In fact, that's just what you made. You made a WWE wrestling horror flick and tried to gussy it up by using the Michael Myers mask. Don't think we didn't notice you placed every famous horror actor and actress into shitty cameo's so they could impress us with their D grade acting chops. Wink Wink Robert...we get're a fan of horror. And while I'm at it, why in the hell did you turn Michael into a demolition expert at the end of the flick? 10 minutes of him kicking doors, hitting walls, and knocking the ceiling down made me feel like I was watching "Extreme Makeover : Home Edition". Christ on a Cracker that was annoying... Too bad you didn't let someone with taste read your shitty script or watch your silly dailies. Please just go back to directing Marilyn Manson videos or some worthless shit like that. You have no place in addressing the classics. Respectfully yours, Kingdaddy P.S. Can't wait to see what you do with "See No Evil 2". Maybe Jason will let you use his hockey mask???

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 6:24 p.m. CST

    not so fast....

    by felonious

    i wouldn't call this a good movie by any stretch of the imagination. the first third (before the return to haddonfield) was okay and somewhat interesting but a little too violent/graphic to say the least. the second third was absolutely pathetic, just a copy of the first halloween. but! the last third, michael chasing laurie was actually pretty good! for the most part, i prefer that to the original. you could insert zombie's version of that into the first movie and actually make it a better movie.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 7:06 p.m. CST

    I Am The Only Person In the World Who Liked Halloween 3

    by LaserPants

    I know it was totally retarded and ridiculous, had nothing to do with Michael Myers whatsoever, and was really kind of awful, but I thought it was great. Like, the robots with the apple sauce that came out of their heads? Awesome. Of course, it made no sense, and had no business being called Halloween 3, but I thought it was great when I was a kid. Of course, I haven't actually watched the movie in over 20 years, so... <br><br>Anyways, that part where all the bugs and snakes come out of the kids head and kills his parents was pure retardo-awesomeness. Great apocalytpic ending too. Yes, yes, I know, I'm the only one who doesn't hate it.<br><br> All that being said, given the piss poor reviews this has gotten thus far, I think I'll wait for DVD. I love Zombies stuff, but I think maybe he was out of his depth on this one. He's more of a transgressive horror kind of guy whereas Halloween is a little more subdued / restrained / suspenseful (at least the first 2 -- the only really good ones). Still, I eagerly look forward to whenever he sees fit to do the WEREWOLF WOMEN OF THE SS full-length feature...

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 7:09 p.m. CST

    Oh Yeah, And HALLOWEEN 1 & 2 Pretty Much Say It All

    by LaserPants

    On the Michael Myers "saga". pretty much all you need to watch are part 1 and 2. They're both classic. Everything after that gets progressively worse. Still, I do want to see Zombies version before I make the final judgement. I loved his other moobies.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 7:11 p.m. CST


    by Err

    It figures he'd like it. *eye roll*

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 7:15 p.m. CST

    Giving it a shot...

    by Forsakyn

    I obviously enjoyed the original, but it's not on some sort of pedestal for me. The Thing is still by far Carpenter's best work (in my opinion, of course). Heck, all of his films were good back then. Anyhow, soon enough I'll know if it's good, passable, or just plain sucks.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 7:21 p.m. CST


    by Kingdaddy

    No, he didn't rape my sister. He just raped my eyes, my brain, and my wallet. It's as if Uwe Boll remade Goodfellas but decided to make all of the lead characters gay men. It just makes no sense why he made the choices he made. Zombie just made an absolute trainwreck out of a classic story.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 7:27 p.m. CST

    All I know is...

    by yaz67

    Dr. Pepper rules.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 7:37 p.m. CST

    no torture porn here

    by zooch

    there was no rape, no sadism, no torture in this film. There is violence but Myers just kills people, straight up. I was surprised the film had a lot of real scares. They even made me jump a few times.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 8:36 p.m. CST


    by slappy jones

    you summed it up so nicely...that is what I have been saying. this is just a nice cover version of a favorite song I can nwo enjoy along with the original. the phoney hatred at this movie is nuts...if you want to rage at anything rage at the fucking stupid druids and rage at "trick or treat motherfucker" busta rhymes taking a huge piss all ovber myers legacy. This is a great addition to the halloween franchise. I will gladly take this over ports 4-8 any day. the hate all seems so predetermined that it is so obvious people were just not prepared to give it a chance at all. Look I love quint and all but he hated the script. he hated the trailer so why even bother reviewing it?? it is fairly obvious what he was going to think of it.......

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 9:06 p.m. CST

    Just saw it. FANTASTIC horror film.

    by LoneGun

    Scary as hell. And twisted in the most devilishly entertaining way. As far as I'm concerned, Rob Zombie hit this one out of the ball park. Cheers!

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 9:12 p.m. CST

    Speaks volumes...

    by yolt13

    ...that the people who are being assholes here are talking about Rob Zombie rather than the film. Excellent movie. It's funny how I've seen it twice and, while I see his stylistic touches, I never once saw Zombie himself in the film. Never once found myself thinking "Boy, I don't give two shits what's happening onscreen! Since when does the quality of the movie matter to me? I'm just going to hate this because that HOUSE OF 1000 CORPSES guy made it!" Maybe some of you guys nursing hate hard-ons for Zombie should try actually watching the movie.

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 10:01 p.m. CST

    Did Massawyrm Review a Workprint too?

    by TheBladehelm

    Although the characters clearly BELONGED in a trailer park, in the version I saw, they lived in the same neighborhood as Laurie and her friends live in, in a two story house with a pool no less. Where was the trailer park?

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 10:01 p.m. CST

    it just sucks

    by blonde redhead

    RZ needs to stop making everyone a redneck in his films. really. he also needs to understand that my theater was fairly empty to begin with and that another ten-fifteen people walked out at the halfway mark. he should also know that at the end there was a rousing chorus of BOOOOs from some people in the front row who spent most of their time laughing out loud at the entire thing. the in-jokes annoyed. sheriff 'lee brackett'--annoying. putting 'white zombie' starring bela on one of the tv's in the background--annoying. reusing 'the thing' on the tv's in the background--also annoying. i loved the devil's rejects but this movie sucked. badly. anyone who says it was great is highly delusional and trying desperately to convince themselves otherwise. let me tell you that in the end you will fail because this movie blows chunks. what time period are we in? it's not the seventies, so cut those kids' hair, rob. and yeah, every girl i know listens to blue oyster cult. where the hell are we in this film? the sense of space was so retardedly idiotic. we're in a basement! now we're in an attic! or something! and there's a wire fence down there too and who the fuck knows why! now we're in a swimming pool? was that michael's old house? i thought they were trailer trash! too many crawling deaths, why is michael a pro wrestler, sorry rob but chicks don't talk like that in front of their parents unless they're idiot sluts which laurie most certainly isn't, your film sucked, please make your own stuff and stay away from remakes kthxbai

  • Aug. 31, 2007, 11:55 p.m. CST


    by TheDohDoh

    you know it's true. Zombie slammed this fucker home. It's what any good director would do with this property and it kicks the living shit out of Tarantino's Death Proof. If this thing was directed by Tarantino and not an outsider like Zombie all of these AICN reviewers would be sucking its anus. Fuck you Moriarty. You're going to give Shoot Em Up a better review when it's just a variation on Crank. Your career is going to die and Zombie's will flourish. You know why? The dude's an original. He doesn't give a shit what Carpenter's done. He's his own man and he's out to do horror for a new generation. Sad BUT TRUE>!!!

  • Sept. 1, 2007, 12:42 a.m. CST

    Hey! Hey! It's a Monkee Cameo!!! Anyone catch Mickey?

    by Drunken Busboy

    I won't bother to review this for people. To me nothing beats the original. However did anyone notice the Mickey Dolenz as the red neck gun shop owner in this movie! For me that was the only part of the movie that surprised me.

  • Sept. 1, 2007, 4:21 a.m. CST

    What the Hell!

    by maxx36

    John Carpenter must be ready to kill Mr. Zombie after what he did to his classic movie. The movie even made me what to kill him, the original was great and this one did nothing but make me want to kill everone in the movie. Does everyone in Zombie's movies have to be white trash? It just Sucked and should have gone to DVD and even them it would still suck.

  • Sept. 1, 2007, 4:30 a.m. CST

    My honest 2 cents...spoiler free

    by Joey_Redballs

    I just got back from a late night, and I figured while I was munching on Mac & Cheese I'd give you my review of Halloween. (spoiler free) Is it as good as the original? Of course not. But it tries-to-be "original". It is very different in many, many ways. It's definitely worth seeing at the theater if you're a horror hound. If not, it can wait for DVD. It could have been a lot worse of a remake by far. I went in with my expectations REALLY low, and afterwards I was satisfied that I spent my time watching it. But then again I saw it for free (via inside-DVD "Joupon" from Best Buy). So my advice for watching Rob Zombie's Halloween is much the same as my "soup kitchen" approach for struggling guys trying to get laid..."Keep your hopes high, and your standards low." And in this case, you'll enjoy Rob Zombie's Halloweeen. I did. 2.75 stars out of a possible 4 stars (0.25 of a star was added cuz I saw the movie for free, and free makes everything better) P.S. I'd say I give the original John Carpentar's Halloween 3.5 out of 4 stars, but I might be padding that by 0.5 of a star cuz pop culture has driven into my brain that it's a "classic". And it is. It didn't give birth to the slasher genre, but the original Halloween certainly did popularize the slasher subgenre (leading to countless copycats, homages, and tributes) so without it..would there have been enough slasher movies to warrant coining the term "slasher flick" in the first place? P.P.S. Since over half the movie takes place BEFORE Halloween day, it's more of a prequel but still its own thing, so it's still a remake. It's a "requel"? P.P.P.S. I loved seeing the guys in row 3 who were videotaping the movie with their cell phones. I saw the bright light of their phone screens during nearly the whole movie. A good cell phone video would have been of me videotaping them videotaping the movie. Hindsight is 20-20.

  • Sept. 1, 2007, 6:10 a.m. CST

    Beware any sentient being that LIKED this film

    by quantize

    its first class DOGSHIT for fucktards ONLY

  • Sept. 1, 2007, 6:28 a.m. CST

    where was the outcry when

    by slappy jones

    busta rhymes was fucking shaq fuing myers and kicking his ass in hand to hand combat? if anything did its darndest to fucking "ruin" carpenters film it was that....or those fuking stupid druids and whatnot...i will take this version over any of those fucking terrible sequels any day..I just did not see this type of outcry when busta rhymes was saying "trick or treat mother fucker"....oh and I am sick of seeing reviews and comments where people say things like "man he ruined the original" ....its horseshit.....the original is is still there safe and sound.

  • Sept. 1, 2007, 6:34 a.m. CST

    3 more days to Halloween....Silver Shamrock

    by classyfredblassy

    Tom Atkins performance in Halloween was truly one for the ages. I mean, it is up there with Ed Norton's turn as reformed skinhead in American History X. In the scene were he is forced to watch Conal Cochran's test subjects suffer and die via the closet circuit tv was so powerful. You could just feel the rage and sorrow in Tom Atkins as he watched the young boy's head melt into a sea of bugs and snakes. The way he just clenched his fists and closed his eyes......"sigh". Talk about saying so much with so little. And who could forgot the evil Dan O'Herlihy famous words ""A good magician never tells"..."a little bit of this, a little bit of that"....gasp!

  • Sept. 1, 2007, 9 a.m. CST

    Memories-Of-Murder, yes it from Halloween 3

    by classyfredblassy

    Season of the Biotch. What a haunting melody, huh? And why is there no love on this board for Halloween: H20? That was ten times better as a sequal than Halloween 2. In Halloween 2, all Laurie (Jamie Lee) did was limp around and mutter in a drug induced stuper. Now in H20, she had some balls, like you would expect Laurie to grow up to be like. Plus, H20 had the best score since the original Halloween. John Ottman = Future John Williams.

  • Sept. 1, 2007, 9:49 a.m. CST

    Not to flip-flop from Mori's comments but

    by Stalkeye

    I digress,the best part about the remake was the first half or as i would call it: Micheal Myers the early years. It puts a 'humanzing' face on the character without making him too one dimensional and the scenes of Micheal and Loomis showed promise afterwards the film became a mess. I was content with the choice of Tyler (Sabertooth from Xmen) mane as the shape,same goes for mcdowell as loomis, but do we have to see Sherry in every movie Rob makes? The chick that played curtis' role can't act to save her ass from micheal,freddy or Jason. It had potentual but it was too rushed,but at least it payed more homage to the original unlike Superman returns to Superman.BTW love the misfits song Halloween 2 good choice for the soundtrack.

  • Sept. 1, 2007, 10:07 a.m. CST

    Long Live Kevin Williamson!

    by Callowtween

    Yet another eager fan boy panders to the likes of a talent less HACK like Rob Zombie. This film, which has no reason to exist, sabotages a simple masterpiece by exposing the “facets” of what was nothing more than a horrifying forms of sorts. Inept musicians should steer clear of generic psychoanalysis in order to justify some form of action. R.Z. is at liable for the erosion of intelligent horror, such as John Carpenter’s original. M. Myers has been condensed to a non-in-the-least-bit menacing, scowling fat turd of kid and The Undertaker. Kevin Williamson’s treatment is compelling because it remains true to the Carpenter formula: the Shape remains a Shape, therefore we do not question any measures he may take.

  • Sept. 1, 2007, 10:19 a.m. CST


    by Mr. Nice Gaius

    It was a fucking joke.<P>Relax.<P> Take a chill pill and smoke your pipe.

  • Sept. 1, 2007, 10:30 a.m. CST

    Figures with Massa

    by PhantomSpazzz

    His reviews are solely based on running in the opposite direction of the popular belief at the time. He sucks.

  • Sept. 1, 2007, 10:56 a.m. CST


    by INWOsuxRED

    Yes, I would expect Jamie Lee Curtis to have balls too...if you know what I mean.

  • Sept. 1, 2007, 11:05 a.m. CST

    Massawrym - WRONG ONCE AGAIN

    by El Scorcho

    Seriously, at this point I can read Massa's reviews and know I'm going to think the opposite. Fucker is unhinged.

  • Sept. 1, 2007, 11:07 a.m. CST

    HALLOWEEN 3: A Lost Camp Classic Of Awesome RetardoFilm

    by LaserPants

    The part where the bugs and snakes come out of the kids melting head, who then proceed to kill the parents is pure retardo awesomeness. I think there needs to be a violent resurgence of HALLOWEEN 3 fandom. It ruled. Because it was awful. Perfectly awful. In the way that it sticks in yr head forever; a camp classic!

  • Sept. 1, 2007, 11:09 a.m. CST

    Which version of "I'm your boogie man" do you want?

    by INWOsuxRED

    I suppose it depends on if you want to rock out or not. When I'm in the mood to rock out, AND I'm also in the mood to hear "I'm your boogie man", I choose the version from White Zombie.

  • Sept. 1, 2007, 11:14 a.m. CST


    by INWOsuxRED

    You can take the girl out of the trailer park...

  • Sept. 1, 2007, 11:27 a.m. CST


    by Mr. Nice Gaius

    Devin over at CHUD gave this film a "FUCK YOU OUT OF TEN"! Nunz's review is pretty brutal, too.<P>More and more, this just sounds like a BAD film on every level. Thankfully, I'll let Zombie's precedent speak for itself and save my money.<P>Wake me up when someone actually makes a good, original horror movie.

  • Sept. 1, 2007, 12:28 p.m. CST

    This is like letting Harry review a KFC bucket

    by Doctor_Sin

    It's gonna get glowing reviews, no matter what. Massa is *wrong* here.

  • Sept. 1, 2007, 12:49 p.m. CST


    by TheDohDoh

    Woooohah. Zombie's a made man. Can't wait to see his Sasquatch dream project become a reality. Celebrate. Fuck the haters. Michael Myers is back!!!!

  • Sept. 1, 2007, 12:59 p.m. CST

    This is only unbiased review on this site

    by zooch

    and it's not because it's positive either. It's because he liked for what it was and not for what he thought it should be.

  • Sept. 1, 2007, 2:52 p.m. CST


    by TheBladehelm

    Stephen King once said of the movies made from his books that no matter how shitty they were, they would never ruin the original source material. So I take your point that people just need to let it go and stop with all the raping my childhood talk.<br><br>My complaint about this movie stems from the fact that it is TOO like the original in some places which negate the efforts to make it different, and even creates glaring inconsistencies. People have been telling me to judge this movie on its own, so I am...And the movie on it's own is a hodgepodge mess. He tries to humanize Michael and make him realisitc, but then he just becomes a giant hulking unstoppable killing machine in the mold of Jason Vorhees. All humanity and realism leaves the film as soon as we get back to 'present day' and it becomes a slightly more graphic and nowhere near as scary retread of the original.<br><br>And still no one can tell me why Massawyrm thinks a two story house with a pool is a trailer in a trailer park.

  • Sept. 1, 2007, 2:53 p.m. CST

    And yes, Kevin Williamson sucks balls.

    by TheBladehelm

    I blame him for the general decline in the quality of horror.

  • Sept. 1, 2007, 3:12 p.m. CST

    Scream was OVER-RATED

    by classyfredblassy

    But Halloween H20 was pretty damn good. Nice to get away from all the druid nonsense. Who the fuck was that dude at the end of Halloween 5 that blow up the jail cell to let Meyers out? WTF was that all about?

  • Sept. 1, 2007, 3:19 p.m. CST

    is it scary though?

    by abner pepper

    I don't care how different it is.Is it fucking scary?And yes Halloween 3SOTW was the balls.

  • Sept. 1, 2007, 3:48 p.m. CST

    abner pepper

    by TheBladehelm

    No, NOT SCARY. Startling at times, a little gross, and sometimes a bit too gratuitous. But I never got creeped out or scared, not even once.

  • Sept. 1, 2007, 3:49 p.m. CST

    this movie is SHIT

    by Mogwai Democracy

    it's not about canon, or anything like that. it's about pure lack of competence in writing, editing, and directing. this movie is a mess & zombie shouldn't be let within a mile of a directors chair ever again.

  • Sept. 1, 2007, 4:17 p.m. CST

    Hey Rob Zombie!!!

    by Kingdaddy

    Why did you pick Memories-of-Murder as your AICN profile name? Oh, and while I'm here, your Halloween still sucks YAK BALLS.

  • Sept. 1, 2007, 4:49 p.m. CST


    by PhantomSpazzz

    you state my "hypothesis fall falt on it's face when we consider that Massa enjoyed and gave a positive review of Bayformers. Try harder next time, and this time with an informed opinion". Of course....I was generally speaking you tool! If you read any talkback of Massa's reviews you'll notice a communal "eyerolling" in the talkbacks in response to his shitty-ness. As far as saying that Kevin Williamson is overrated I believe his script for the original Scream was very brilliant and entertaining. I think we can all agree that it was fun to FINALLY see a horror movie point out the genres cliches as the story progressed which was ground breaking at that time. I'll actually go out on the limb and say that Scream really revived horror because at that time the genre was stale and old. I know your really excited Memories-of-Murder that your getting ready to start your freshmen year of college and just because you received your Film101 book in the mail this week from Amazon your ready to spread your wisdom to's cute.

  • Sept. 1, 2007, 4:51 p.m. CST

    Agree wholeheartedly, Massa

    by Zeke25:17

    Here's what I emailed to a friend just the other day: Carpenter's scary little independent feature (made for $300,000 and shot in three weeks, can you imagine?) is now rightly regarded by many as a classic of the genre, right up there with Hitch's Psycho. No doubt this is one of the reasons internet people who live to bitch about things were pretty much predisposed to hate Zombie's take from the start. It's almost easier to find a good moment in a Uwe Boll film than a positive review of this movie. Notice I don't say "remake". Because it really isn't: it's a complete reworking of the basic idea. The original Halloween was focused more on the character of Laurie Strode; here, Michael Myers himself is the protagonist. Zombie doesn't actually want you to root for him: rather, he liked the concept of taking the supernatural aspect of Myers away, and he does this by giving him a pretty good backstory. We see him as a kid (the young actor is wonderfully creepy), we see his time in the asylum...and finally, in the last third or so of the film, we see Michael as we came to know him almost 30 years ago. Certainly, not everything in the film works...but then, not everything worked perfectly in the original, either. To me--while I was watching the film, anyway--I rather enjoyed it. It's only afterwards that a continuity error or two shows up in your memory (honestly, I've never been good at spotting those; some people are so adept at it it's sickening); or you start to ask yourself how in hell Myers knew not only what his younger sister would look like today, but who adopted her and where to find them. I find that for the most part, if a movie is working for me, nagging little details tend to be disregarded as the story moves forward. Something you may not have known: Carpenter's first idea for the film was simply that it would be about a killer who stalks babysitters (it would have been titled simply The Babysitter Killer...stroke of genius there!), and it was producer Irwin Yablans who came up with the whole Halloween thing. What I'm saying is, it wasn't like we were witnessing the second coming of Shakespeare here. Zombie, frankly, is up to bigger things with his version; and does what anyone attempting a redoing of an older film should do--form something new and different using elements of the original. This, indeed, he does. Neither he nor Carpenter should feel they have to apologize for anything.

  • Sept. 1, 2007, 5:17 p.m. CST

    It had a pretty good Friday take...

    by Forsakyn

    $10,950,000 (according to - so hitting 25 million or so through Monday seems pretty feasible. Don't know what the budget was, but I imagine it wasn't too bad, so the movie will already be profitable after this weekend. Not sure how long its legs will last, but this will certainly set up Zombie for his next film - and I'm glad. Again, I didn't like House of 1000 Corpses, but thought The Devil's Rejects was great, so I actually look forward to Zombie's films. I'm hoping his next after Halloween will be original again, but even if it isn't I'll see it in the theater. And I'll be checking out Halloween on Monday.

  • Sept. 1, 2007, 5:28 p.m. CST

    Original Halloween Doesn't Work For Todays Teens

    by LaserPants

    Teenagers being the optimum demographic for horror films. The whole exploitogorefest thing that Zombie does is much more their speed. I reckon old heads will be disappointed, but the youngins will go batshit crayzay for this. Do ya think? I think I'll wait for DVD, but maybe I'll go see it. <br><br> Oh, but, fuck remakes in general. RZ should make WEREWOLF WOMEN OF THE SS; really sleaze it up and pornify it. That would rule.

  • Sept. 1, 2007, 6:24 p.m. CST

    About as valid as "The Fog".

    by The Devilled Backscribe

    Over-gore. Over-white trash. Over-expletives. 30 minutes in, I was over Zombie's version. There's not one scene that Carpenter didn't do better. I don't need to see 40 pointless minutes of psychology about Michael. He was scarier when was inexplicable. Ten plus mill already? Sad.

  • Sept. 1, 2007, 7:48 p.m. CST

    Today's Teens Can Blow Me

    by TheBladehelm

    If the pacing and style of a good movie isn't going to appeal to todays teens (who technically, for the most part, aren't allowed in rated R movies in the first place) then fuck them in the ass! Horror is a genre that is usually thought of as the lowest common denominator of film as it is, it doesn't need any more dumbing down.

  • Sept. 1, 2007, 8:42 p.m. CST

    Perhaps my standards are too low..

    by Jme

    ..but I liked it. It's always good to see a horror movie in a major cineplex, and I will continue to support them whenever I can no matter what the word-of-mouth is(even if GRINDHOUSE was just a glorified action movie). I will, however, admit Zombie dropped the ball big-time once Myers returned to Haddonfield. Much of the latter half was by-the-numbers-word-for-word. Unfortunately two of my favorite scenes were completely destroyed. Annie's "hey creep speed kills" line was gone, which I though was a cool little moment in the original. Also, the scene that in my opinion was the HOME RUN of the original: 'Was that the boogeyman?' 'As a matter of fact, it was.' That exchange was completely raped. Ruined. Shit :( I was also hoping to see the confrontation in the closet. But I didn't see that. Or did I? The last 30mins was kind of a blur, actually. Anyway, despite all this I really liked it. It didn't take away any of my fondness for the original. And I kind of liked the shocking and harsh nature of the first half. *as a side note: I like HALLOWEEN 2 and 3 more than 1 anyway <runs for cover>

  • Sept. 1, 2007, 9:59 p.m. CST

    Enjoyed it as well.

    by Fenrisulfr

    As flawed as the film is in its plot and characters, I enjoyed it. The biggest problems were the plot and the characters. When unmasked, Daeg Faerch is not half as creepy as he should have been. He plays young Michael like a simple child who has troubles at school, never like a psychopath in becoming. The only time he is convincing is when he wears his clown mask and actually kills. But the rest of the time he just doesn't have that evil aura one could have expected him to display. Tyler Mane doesn't have much to do besides slamming people into walls and stabbing them to death, a job he does really well, even though he's not quite as scary as Andrew Bryniarski's Leatherface. But the connection between young and adult Michael is just hard to buy. How can such a small kid become a beast. It would have been plausible if Myers was 6 in the film, but here Daeg looks already like a young teenager, and at that age you can already have an idea of his adult corpulence. Certainly not Tyler Mane's. So it was a bit distracting, and contributed to that feeling of disconnection between the two parts. The rest of the cast is on and off. Sheri Moon Zombie gives the best performance. She does have some interesting scenes, like when she visits Myers at the asylum and later when she decides to commit suicide. Malcolm McDowell... man, I really prefered Donald Pleasance as Loomis. McDowell's performance is often too over-the-top and some of his lines (actually many of them) are absolutely terrible. Scout-Taylor Whatever as Laurie Strode was far from the best choice. Too nice, too naive, too annoying. She is so cheesy and is not what I could call a good actress. William Forsythe is great as always.. He is such a convincing asshole, and an expert at mean, violent characters that I always enjoy watching him shit on people all around him. I cheered everytime he said "Bitch!". And then there are the victims.I know most of them are onscreen to be killed by Michael, but there's a minimum that you have to do to keep people interested in your protagonists. Here you never give a shit about any character because they have close to ZERO background and are for the great majority unlikable, with very few exceptions (the cutie Danielle Harris, veteran of the series). The second problem is the plot and the way the scenes are cut. A perfect example is the arrival of Michael in the asylum. Zombie wastes the exploration of the characters (both Myers and Loomis) by resuming the killer's descent into a silent madness to a few sequences of "Come on Michael Talk to Me". Because of the way they're edited, you never feel the progression of Michael's evil side. After a while he just decides to shut up, kill a ridiculously stupid nurse (who turned her back on this young psycho as if to say "please stab me in the back") and then the first film cuts abruptly to the second one. Now, with such major flaws, you can't call it a good movie. But still, there are some other things to enjoy, and this is precisely what I did. I loved the Halloween ambiance and overall look of the film. I loved the kills, which were brutal and very bloody. The best killing sequence, which happens to be also the best moment of the picture, is the family massacre. It's filmed with a visceral intensity and is emphasized by an awesome soundtrack. The score, made of distorted, disturbing sounds is probably what I loved the most in the film. The theme during the climax when Michael chases Laurie was great as well. Whoever composed the score did a great job. And of course, there were Danielle Harris's boobies. So here it is, the final word about Rob Zombie's Halloween: It's a flawed horror movie full of blood and tits, with a great score and atmosphere.The flaws are mostly the characters and the plot and can only be attributed to its writer/director. This remake was not necessary, it could have been much better, but I still liked it.

  • Sept. 2, 2007, 9:34 a.m. CST

    The Descent rocked!

    by classyfredblassy

    Good call IAmMrMonkey! That is one of the few films that completely silence the teenage-baseball-cap-on-sideways cell phone crowd that is the theater. THey came to yuck it up, but about an hour into the jaws were on the floor, and their biotches were hiding their faces in their hands.

  • Sept. 2, 2007, 12:22 p.m. CST


    by zooch

    The Descent has no atmosphere or visual style?!? are you nuts?

  • Sept. 2, 2007, 2:34 p.m. CST


    by INWOsuxRED

    "Saying he sold out is one way to put it. a more fanciful way to put it is to say he's retired, and the paychecks he gets from the remakes of his previous work are his retirement pension."</br></br>The point of the conversation was you tried to suggest validity in "Zombie's" work because Carpenter gave him his blessing, but the reality is Carpenter could care less what happens with his catalog. Call it "Sell-Out" or call it "retirement", Carpenter obviously doesn't give a shit about relaunches of his films.

  • Sept. 2, 2007, 3:41 p.m. CST

    zooch, i'd day he is equally nuts on

    by classyfredblassy

    the issue of zero character development in the Descent. How many horror films send an hour with the characters before the shit hits the fan? Oh wait, that would be the Excorist and Jaws, guess they suck toom huh KanekoFan.

  • Sept. 2, 2007, 5:48 p.m. CST


    by quizkidsmith

    Courtney Gains and Adrienne Barbeau were in this? Where???

  • Sept. 3, 2007, 2:07 a.m. CST


    by Cromley

    this movie is the biggest piece of crap in film history. hell you prolly loved coneheads massa

  • Sept. 4, 2007, 5:11 p.m. CST

    Usually when Massa likes something that Mori didn't

    by Lando Griffin

    Mori comes and takes some subtle jabs in the talkbacks. Wha' happened?