Cool News
Uncapie Bids An Affectionate-But-Welcomed Adieu To Batboys And Killer Kittens!!
Yo! I'm Uncapie!
Weekly World News, the comic bookesque tabloid that graced newsstands and grocery stores across the nation since its debut in 1979, will finally print its last issue August 3rd.
Like the late "National Lampoon" magazine from yesteryear, they were
noted for such bizarre headlines as "Boy Locked In Refrigerator; Eats Own Foot," "Space Alien Meets With Bill Clinton," "I Was Bigfoot's Love Slave," "London Double-Decker Bus Found On Moon" and the most famous, "Bat Child Found In Cave," who later became their world renowned mascot, "Bat Boy."
Bob Greenberger, an editor with the Weekly World News, explained that he and his staff were called into a meeting and were told that the board of directors decided that it was in the best interest of the new owners that publish several other newspapers to cease publication of Weekly World News and to focus on the serious side of journalism.
Like we have enough of those already.
Weekly World News was never taken to be serious. It was all about a bunch of guys sitting around(Probably drunk.) dreaming up the weirdest stories the public would buy. They were funny, strange-o and just too far out to be believed.
Whose head didn't turn at the check-out line looking at some of those headlines and found yourself picking up a copy reading the story "Boy Gets Locked In Refrigerator Again! Eats Other Foot!"
They created a comedic diversion in a world that's constantly under pressure allowing us to laugh at the world and at ourselves.
And a few extraterrestrials thrown in for good measure.
Thanks for the laughs guys!
Uncapie
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it'll be missed!
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I am seriously sad that Weekly World News is gone... when i was in college my buddies and i couldn't wait for the new issue each week, then we would buy it and sit around getting loaded laughing our asses off.
Goodbye Weekly World News... -
But how will I ever find out how many steaks the world's fattest man eats in a day? :(
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Like the Blob.I'm not sure if this is a good sign, or a bad one. One thing, there won't be those stupid headlines, that some people swear might be true. The other thing is, now what in the hell will I look at when I'm standing in the check-out? I'm sick of looking at all those pretty people on the magazine covers saying how they lost all the weight, and half the time I wish I didn't know which "hot star" has cellulite.
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one of those things I never really picked up and read but it made standing at grocery line a little more easier reading goofy-ass headlines while some goon in front of me is paying 20 dollars worth of groceries with a plastic bag full of change.
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I didnt know these stories were fake. u bastard
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I never bought it, but I think we need things like this out there. Poor Batboy.
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I read weekly world all the time. Have since I was a kid. This world will suck without it. WHAT THE FUCK! Somebody else should pick them up. Seriously. It's only been getting better as the years have gone by. Way better than the pretentious onion.
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One of the best scenes in men in black is when they go to weekly world news for the actual news. "An Alien Stole My Husbands Skin"
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Weekly world news played a prominent role in the smash hit film "So I married an axe murderer"
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...as long as we carry its memory in our hearts (which may or may not be outside our bodies and/or have something to do with the end of the world). I loved WWN as a teen, proudly buying my first issue (Bat Boy) when I spied its glorious cover in the checkout line at Safeway. I've bought T-shirts, considered a Bat Boy tattoo, and even went to see Bat Boy: The Musical. Yep, WWN, you will be missed.
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Am I nuts or was there a short lived Weekly World News TV show back in the mid 90s? Maybe on USA after Duckman??
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No more Bob Barker...No more Weekly World News...what next?!?!?
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Wait a minute...wasn't that one actually from "Airplane!" ??
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details inside!
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. . . I need to hurry up and order that Batboy t-shirt like I've always wanted to do. That picture cheers me up every time. I still remember my Dad having to explain that this wasn't a real newspaper as I stared in awe at a real picture of fucking Bigfoot in line at the grocery store. I was crushed.
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"Alien proclaims: 'I will land my UFO at Mardi Gras... ON FAT TUESDAY!'"
I think if someone took some old covers and made posters out of them they would make a killing. -
I still have my copy of George Bush Sr. meeting with the alien on the White House lawn. I think that alien met with every president since the paper started. Great publication and its too bad the new owners have such a large stick up their ass.
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... Batboy Escapes! Leads Cops on High Speed Chase! Accompanied by heavily (and badly, natch) Photoshopped pic of our hero at the wheel of his getaway car followed by seemingly hundreds of cop cars a la The Blues Brothers. Now all I have to amuse myself in the interminable grocery store check out line (I always get stuck behind the inevitable 300 lb. woman in a housedress buying bag after endless bag of pork rinds and cat food and paying in single bills and coins, plus the always-present 500 varied coupons, half of which have passed their expiration dates... but I digress), as I was saying, the only thing left at the supermarket now are celebrity mags with stories about La Lohans latest drug bust (doesn't she have at least 3 or 4 of those a week?) and how she has to wear some kind of ankle bracelet that gives her a massive, heart-stopping electrical shock every time the thing senses cocaine in her blood, which is 24 hours a day. And she's actually become addicted to the rush she gets from the electricity and has developed the mutant ability to hurl bolts of lightning infused with vaporized blow as well as having grown to gigantic proportions and has, therefore, signed on to headline JJ Abrams latest project, code-named Blowfield or La 1-18-08 and blow-detecting, mutagenic ankle bracelets are now a hot fashion statement amongst the young, rich party-going set.
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if there isn't an online version already.
Why waste all that money printing paper when so many people prefer reading online.
It will be one of my regulars along with The Onion -
I used to buy and save this for many years, and built up a huge pile of issues. The real humor came from reading the entire issue over many weeks. One article one week, would be cross referenced in another article the next week, etc. And the Psychic stuff was really great.
Alot of my friends would buy this regularly, but in the early 90's, it was 50 cents, then I think it was 75 cents, then 1 dollar, and then 2, then 3, then 4. Recently it's still 4 or 5 dollars. The page count also dropped. So it became something I might only buy once every few months if it looked good.
It priced itself out of the market. They need to figure out an on-line model, or it's just history. I'll miss the "Hell is now full", or "Clinton with Aliens". BatBoy was OK. They seemed at their peak in mid 1990's. But again, I lost interest as price doubled, and doubled, etc. It was the only reason I even looked at all the worthless trash at checkout. -
Apparently his nightvision is what found Saddam in the cave. This is true. Man, though, this sucks, now what will I read? I always said I hated tabloids but loved WWN because they actually knew they were full of shit and went with it, as opposed to all the ridiculous celebrity shit. Fuck....
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I never will forget my favorite cover, about the skeletons in the Titanic life rings that were found holding hands, and the shocking revelation that they were two male skeletons! Gay couple on the Titanic!
So where are we supposed to go for crazy fake news now? Fox? -
We all atleast know one person in our lifetime that reads that mag and thinks it's true. I used to have an old lady that lived next to me that would get me to pick her up a copy whenever I went to the store. I made the mistake of goofing on the cover story one day,it had a picture of the Waco Texas compound burning down with the devils face in the cloud of smoke. When I laughed and told her how fake I thought it was she got very upset. Good luck WWN and thanks for the laughs. Now all we need is a WWN movie where someone finds out this shit was all really going down. Not in a comedic way either,thats been done to death, a real dark spooky kind of deal.
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Jul 26, 2007 4:45:00 PM CDT
The Men In Black just lost a primary information source
by greatwhitenoise
Now they'll have to rely solely on the Enquirer and the Star. (Mind you, I suppose they have CNN and Fox News to fall back on.)
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We all knew it would happen eventually. The aliens, the mafia, and the terrorists all worked in cahoots to shut down the one mouthpiece of truth in our corrupt society. My only question is, why didn't any of WWN's on-staff psychics see this coming?
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Elvis Presley sperm bank? The world wonders.
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Good for chuckling at in line at the grocery store, yes. Did anyone over the age of twelve actually ever buy a copy?
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...Starring Tom Cruise as Batboy, Christopher Walken as The Alien, John Travolta as Bill Clinton, Tom Hanks as Jesus and introducing Harry Knowles as The 300 Pound Baby!
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