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Capone rolls out with TRANSFORMERS to destroy the evil forces oooofffff.... the Decepticons!!!

Published at: June 8, 2009, 9:28 a.m. CST

Hey, everyone. Capone in Chicago here. Deep down inside, I feel that not enough has been written about TRANSFORMERS or how much everybody hates its director, Michael Bay. Saying you hate Michael Bay is about as original as saying Michael Jackson is slightly weird. But the truth about Bay's films is that they are nearly impossible to take your eyes off of, not always for the right reasons. But you watch them with a sense of "Well, I've never seen that before." TRANSFORMERS is the perfect fit for Bay's brand of ultra-slick action filmmaking, where character development doesn't just take a back seat to the special effects and rapid-fire editing; it's actually dragged along behind the movie like a dead carcass. But unlike Bay's previous films (THE ROCK; ARMAGEDDON; PEARL HARBOR; THE ISLAND and the BAD BOYS films) where a little more investment in the characters might have actually made a difference, TRANSFORMERS doesn't require such depths. These alien robots were introduced as toys and a cartoon series, so to pile on motivation and anything beyond a surface-level mythology would be foolish and unnecessary. In the interest of full disclosure, I'll admit I have zero history with any incarnation of the Transformers, but I'm guessing that didn't really make any difference in my evaluation of the film. There are several converging stories happening here. A group of military types in the Middle East are attacked by a helicopter that turns into a robot. Nearly all of the men are killed, except for a small group (which includes Josh Duhamel and Tyrese Gibson) that escapes into the desert. A teenage boy named Sam (Shia LaBeouf) goes out with his dad to buy his first car. For reasons that become clear later in the story, the car ends up picking him. And somewhere on earth, is a giant mechanized cube (known as the Allspark) that is of great value to two armies of robots from the planet Cybertron. And that's pretty much all you need to know going in. Of course, Sam's car turns out to be one of the good guy robots (known as Autobots, led by Optimus Prime), who are protecting him from the Decepticons, a fearsome (and much cooler, in my estimation) group of 'bots bent on finding the Allspark and using it for their evil purposes. Sam's long-dead ancestor discovered a century ago the location of the Allspark on earth and imprinted the information on his glasses, which Sam just happens to have. After the attack on the military base, the government (headed by Secretary of Defense Keller, played by Jon Voight) enlists the help of the world's top computer hackers to discover exactly that the nature of the attack was and to help counter a virus that was injected into the world's computers during the attack. The rest of the film is one spectacular battle sequence after another, interrupted by lame jokes and dozens of underdeveloped characters. Now I know I said that character development isn't important in a film like TRANSFORMERS, but there are entire groups of characters introduced who do absolutely nothing in this film. Let's take for example the introduction of Anthony Anderson into the mix. I like Anderson as an actor, but he's brought in kind of late in the film as the only hacker in the world who can figure out the meaning of a mysterious signal that the Decepticons sent out during an attack. But to get to that point, we have to go through a painful introduction to his character that is meant to be funny but just ends up being dumb and time consuming. While we're on the subject of hackers, an entire group of them is brought in at one point and they just kind of sit there, with the exception of this smoking-hot Australian chick. Hmmm, I wonder why Bay picked her? Similar wastes of time can be found in comedy attempts involving Sam's parents. Twenty minutes could have easily been trimmed from this bloated work, and you wouldn't have even noticed it. But ultimately TRANSFORMERS lives or dies on the strength of its title characters; and those damn robots really and truly blew me away. I was so busy trying to examine the complexities of their constantly shifting and moving design work, that I barely remember what they said. I can say without a hint of blowing things out of proportion or overstating my case that you have never seen anything like the special effects in TRANSFORMERS. I can fault the film on many levels, but not on the craftsmanship that went into designing and bringing to robotic life these astonishing creatures. And the effects magic doesn't stop there. The battle scenes are tremendous. Cars and trucks and tanks and helicopters are tossed all over the place, and each vehicle is given a weight and destructive power when it lands and rips up the street or ground beneath it. And I never really got tired of watching the robots transform from whatever vehicle they were pretending to be. One of the film's big mysteries is the location of Megatron, the leader of the Decepticons. I won't ruin that surprise, but his reveal is pretty great, and the film's destructive splendor is tripled when he arrives. It's hardly worth mentioning the human actors in the movie, but I will single out Shia LaBeouf for breathing some much-needed life into the proceedings. He fulfills every geek fantasy about becoming a hero while the fate of the earth is at stake. But more than that his reactions to being amongst these incredible Autobots are genuine. Of course, he would be struck dumb; who wouldn't be? He has a wild crush on a classmate (the ridiculously stunning Megan Fox, (who, up to know, has mostly done TV work), who ends up becoming his partner in fighting against the Decepticons. And even that storyline kind of works. I should also mention the almost surreal and very welcome presence of John Turturro as Agent Simmons of the super-secret Sector 7 agency. He knows he's in a Michael Bay movie. It's as if he studied Bay's works and came up with ways to stand out amongst all the insanity around him. His performance is so over the top that he makes a far more effective comic relief vehicle than anyone else in the film, plus his character actually does something, which makes him indispensable to the movie. I'm not one of those people who recommend anyone switch off their brain during the summer movie season; I just don't believe you need to pretend to be an idiot to enjoy any movie. But finally acknowledging that TRANSFORMERS is a big, dumb, entertaining flick went a long way toward me actually enjoying most of what I was watching. Even die-hard Bay detractors are going to have a hard time denying the good time they have watching TRANSFORMERS. Capone capone@aintitcool.com



Readers Talkback

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  • July 2, 2007, 1:27 p.m. CST

    first

    by jro123

    first

  • July 2, 2007, 1:28 p.m. CST

    can't wait

    by stvnhthr

    6 hours til showtime!

  • July 2, 2007, 1:29 p.m. CST

    BooYAH!

    by dekionplexis

    ..

  • July 2, 2007, 1:30 p.m. CST

    faggots

    by gotem

    r gay

  • July 2, 2007, 1:31 p.m. CST

    gotem

    by PervOmatic

    is lame

  • July 2, 2007, 1:34 p.m. CST

    Boooyaaaa!

    by bigbaldpapa

    Can't wait till 8pm tonight!

  • July 2, 2007, 1:35 p.m. CST

    transformers

    by cammywobs

    are sexy

  • July 2, 2007, 1:36 p.m. CST

    1 more day....

    by Papayon

    This movie is going to truly be by far the best movie of the year...can't wait. F U!!! to all of the Bay Haters....that man can make anything BLOW UP!!

  • July 2, 2007, 1:36 p.m. CST

    Soundtrack

    by Philvis

    Did the Scottie Brothers do the soundtrack?

  • July 2, 2007, 1:38 p.m. CST

    I love this film

    by filmcoyote

    I've seen it twice and i'll see it again this weekend. The effects truly are incredible and it's great fun.

  • July 2, 2007, 1:39 p.m. CST

    Remove gotem

    by bgart13

    Highly offensive. And not even the best slur they could have come up with. How about motherfuckers?

  • July 2, 2007, 1:39 p.m. CST

    CONVOY er OPTIMUS

    by iwontwin

    FLAME ON!

  • July 2, 2007, 1:42 p.m. CST

    "TRANSFORMERS doesn't require such depths."

    by Thylacine

    Well, I'm glad you cleared that up for anyone hoping for things like character, decent story, or epic space opera. Perhaps you could make us a list of other properties that don't require any meaningful investment of time or thought, so SpielBay can get back to work as soon as possible. I’ll say it again, this movie is so bad, the only way it can get sold at this point, is to market it like a really awful car wreck that charges admission. “Take a look and see things you’ve never seen before!”

  • July 2, 2007, 1:42 p.m. CST

    Optimus has an energon cube and cheats on RC

    by iwontwin

    Where the girl autobots at?

  • July 2, 2007, 1:43 p.m. CST

    WOW

    by mastes360

    The thread is already a few minutes old........and no haters!

  • July 2, 2007, 1:44 p.m. CST

    I'm really starting to get Jazzed about this flick

    by chrth

    Who knew?

  • July 2, 2007, 1:44 p.m. CST

    Saw the movie last night

    by gambit88

    It was actually alot of fun. Sure the dialogue was terrible and the movie essentially mounted up into one giant toy commercial. But it was the best damn toy commercial I have ever seen in my life.

  • July 2, 2007, 1:45 p.m. CST

    Trey Parker made me a Michael Bay hater I think...

    by Transmetropolitan

    BUT... amazing effects, giant robots kicking the shit out of eachother, and promising reviews of a good time in the theater have made me lose all worry and go absolutely crazy about seeing this tonight.

  • July 2, 2007, 1:46 p.m. CST

    Thylacine

    by mastes360

    For fuck sake dude, its a film about giant alien robots that just happen to look like vehicles on Earth, who come here to have a big old barny!. Please for the mother of god......just go and watch the damn film and TRY and have a good couple of hours worth of fun entertainment!!!.

  • July 2, 2007, 1:46 p.m. CST

    once again

    by BadMrWonka

    another review that says, "I'm not the kind of person to advocate having to turn off your brain to enjoy a film", and then admits that you have to do just that to enjoy it.<p>but people yell at me for insinuating as much...ok, well, not insinuating, flat out saying it.<p>I'm sorry my brain doesn't turn off. you guys have your fun.

  • July 2, 2007, 1:47 p.m. CST

    does that make me a Michael Bay fan?

    by Transmetropolitan

    Then bravo, Michael... bravo.

  • July 2, 2007, 1:52 p.m. CST

    I'm sorry my brain doesn't turn off. you guys have your

    by gotem

    it turns ur brain off for u

  • July 2, 2007, 1:56 p.m. CST

    Wait, what?

    by Mattyboy122

    When I watch a Bay film I almost always go "well, I have seen that before" and on top of that, I've most likely seen it done better (in most cases, by Tony Scott...which says a lot about Bay when Tony's got him beat). And when I do see something in a Bay film I haven't seen before, it's usually so over the top it becomes cartoonish. Bay has shown no interest in spreading out or growing as a filmmaker; he's perfectly content with being a director with the mind of a 12-year-old boy (ie wants to see tits, hear cussing, and make things go boom).

  • July 2, 2007, 1:59 p.m. CST

    This movie is KICKWUMP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    by Oatu

    It did not destroy my childhood... I want to sleep with Optimus Prime...!!!

  • July 2, 2007, 2:11 p.m. CST

    Finally a version of Transformers worth watching!

    by FILMFUNK

    Robots in my pies.

  • July 2, 2007, 2:14 p.m. CST

    Let's face it...

    by sapno_krei

    ...This movie only needed to be good, not great, to make Spielberg, Bay, et al happy. It is, after all, the sequels where the truly awesome stuff will come into play. I'm talking Constructicons/Devastator, the planet Cybertron, Unicron. Based on the early reviews, it looks like the filmmakers have succeeded in laying the foundations. I can't wait to see them really kick ass in the sequels.

  • July 2, 2007, 2:16 p.m. CST

    RE: Dr. Gonzo on Michael Bay's Talent

    by mrdinky

    Well, you're partly right. I was bread of DIE HARD and LETHAL WEAPON, so it's not like big action movies make me cry foul. But Bay's are usually bad and fairly talentless. He's good at creating big (usually unrealistic) explosions. That's a talent. He is NOT a talented film maker. There's more to a movie than making things go boom. But I thought THE ISLAND was a nice turn for him. Almost as if to say, "hey look. I'm at least interested in making a whole movie." Unfortunately, he has a taste for over the top that I usually look for in comedies, not action/drama/tragedy. :-(

  • July 2, 2007, 2:17 p.m. CST

    heh

    by mrdinky

    bred. lol

  • July 2, 2007, 2:29 p.m. CST

    "Its Robots from Space what do you expect"

    by Screentime

    Uhhhh, Star Wars that's what I expect. Something of the same level of investment. People act as if the concept is entirely ridiculous. Why are there so many sci-fi movies where the robots take over their planet and gain emotions? Why are there so many alien movies? Because the possibility of both events are highly likely, not ridiculous. When Captain Picard goes to an alien world he disguises himself as one of it's inhabitants, they call it the Prime Directive. Cultural and civilization experts agree that if there was an advanced alien race they would be very likely to follow a similar to the prime directive. It's not ridiculous and should never have been thought of as such by anyone involved in the production.

  • July 2, 2007, 2:31 p.m. CST

    A 'So-So' Review...HATERS ATTACK!

    by Pawprint

    This is what you've been waiting for!<p> Try and vindicate your irrational hatred of this film by picking up on (and blowing out of all proportion) all your favourite criticisms in this 'on-the-fence' review!<p> Go on guys; knock yourselves out - you can have this one if it makes you feel better!

  • July 2, 2007, 2:32 p.m. CST

    ILM is BACK!!

    by kwisatzhaderach

    Eat dirt WETA, ILM have the Oscar in the big this year.

  • July 2, 2007, 2:38 p.m. CST

    Screentime, good job.

    by Thylacine

    But it's all a wash now. The movie is out, and sucks. Wouldn't it have been cool, if someone with vision, and talent, like Brad Bird, made the Transformers movie? But instead of giving it further minutes of our lives, I suggest a new strategy. Heap love upon Ratatouille. It's miles better than Transformers, and needs our love.

  • July 2, 2007, 2:39 p.m. CST

    Go see Ratatouille

    by Thylacine

    The animatiuon is better than photo-realistic- it's chartacter driven! Who'd have thought that one up?

  • July 2, 2007, 2:40 p.m. CST

    im a bay hater but i'll probably like the explosion

    by sokitome

    even though transformers does deserve better, it's still a toyline. At least it's not the abomoination "I,Robot" was. and to those who say "I,Robot" was alright I say you know nothing of Science Fiction if u think that piss poor movie deserved any kind of connection to the brilliance that is the book.

  • July 2, 2007, 2:40 p.m. CST

    You're right about that kwis. ILM...

    by Banshee7

    has served notice. They are THE BEST in the business. Period. Between Transformers and Pirates 3, they have left all other fx houses in the dust. (Although I thought they deseved the oscar for both Episodes 1 & 3 too)

  • July 2, 2007, 2:41 p.m. CST

    god I wish the term "haters" would die...

    by BadMrWonka

    I never hear it from the mouth of anyone with anything legitimate to say...it's a lot like "pwned" in that respect...

  • July 2, 2007, 2:52 p.m. CST

    because..

    by Screentime

    Thats what happened in the cartoon. it showed in the past, over 12 million yeas ago. Cybertron was ruled by organic creatures. The organic creatures were not humanoid but the customers who the quintessons sold their robots to were (thus why the robot forms are primarily bipedal). The quintessons sold the robots as consumer goods and military hardware to many civilizations across the galaxy. but their robots became intelligent and sentient and then took over the planet, forcing the Quintessons to leave. For millions of years the robots lived peacefully building a civilization of their own until Megatron lead the Decepticons to rule over the planet. The power struggle would sway back and forth, the mechanical creatures go through 3 "great wars" between the military hardware who now called themselves Decepticons and the consumer goods who now called themselves Autobots. The Autobots still had time to search the universe for new sources of energon and resources as well as to learn more of the universe. In doing so they adopted an order or rule similar to that of Star Trek's "The Prime Directive". The autobots would disguise themselves so as to not interrupt the natural course of evolution amongst rapidly advancing civilizations.Autobots space cruisers were outfitted with highly advanced computers that would search out and design new forms for each robot.<p><p><p>In the first episode of the cartoon the battle has swayed towards the Decepticons. The Decepticons are winning the battle and the Autobots have just stolen enough energon to help power their escape from the planet in search of a final source of energon. Megatron learns of this and when the Autobots launch their space cruiser, the Ark. Megatron follows them through the cosmos to Earth, before reaching Earth the Decepticons board the Ark and they fight to take control of the it. The ship is damaged in the battle and spirals out of control upon crashing into a volcano. There these Cybertronians remain dormant for 4 million years.<p><p><p>1984 the volcano awakens and in doing so rocks the ship, the molten lava providing a source of energy to the ancient ship. The computer launches a sky spy which travels through the earth gathering information of the planet and returns to the Ark to begin repairing and reconfiguring the onboard crew. Unfortunately the first one it recongfigures and activates is a Decepticon who then revives the rest of the Decepticons.

  • July 2, 2007, 2:55 p.m. CST

    ^ LOL

    by mastes360

    Sorry but i had to.

  • July 2, 2007, 2:59 p.m. CST

    the point is..

    by Screentime

    this is a HUGE interstellar story with great characters with a mythology spanning prolly 50 million years and cahracters that have been around since before the big bang. the difference between its scope and star wars is that this one is in fact BIGGER for us because the story is brought home, to earth. not to mention the characters arefar more badass than even darth vader and his crew.

  • July 2, 2007, 3:01 p.m. CST

    atleast that's how it should have panned out

    by Screentime

    instead we have robots fighting over a metal football and a human saving the day. in the cartoon the decepticons stood and laughed as humans tried firing their weapons a them.

  • July 2, 2007, 3:02 p.m. CST

    Banshee7

    by messi

    Fuck off, episode 3 over king kong? Kong itself is the greatest achivement in CG history, the amount of detail to create something so complex and make it photorealistic is still unbelievable. You have no idea how hard it is to animate hair.

  • July 2, 2007, 3:05 p.m. CST

    Big Bang

    by mastes360

    How the hell could the Transformers be around before the Big Bang lol. If thats the mythology then maybe Bay was right to take the 'all out action' route that he has!.

  • July 2, 2007, 3:06 p.m. CST

    Capone with no history

    by messi

    obviously thinks it's just surface material. Dig deeper capone and you'll find great memorable characters. One of the autobots Sunstreaker, is a sociopath who cars more about his looks than anything else. Mirage is from high society and was thrust into war and can't wait to get home. Hound on the other hand loves earth life and wants to stay.

  • July 2, 2007, 3:08 p.m. CST

    Transformers is as deep as a puddle....

    by pdennett316

    always has been, always will be. The "stories" were threadbare, the animation was shitty, and some of the voice work was pretty poor - and I liked Transformers as a kid. Like it or not, this movie is primarily about robots blowing shit up in order to get an energon cube (fucking allspark? Energon sounds way better). Honestly, if you cant just sit back and be entertained, you must be one joyless motherfucker. I appreciate the more thoughtful and worthy films as much as the next man, but sometimes you just can't be arsed dealing with weighty stuff and appreciate the light and fluffy instead, souflee instead of triple chocolate fudge cake. This is one of those films. If you can't appreciate this for what it is, you can't have looked at a sunset and gone "wow". Yeah, Transformers = Sunsets. Bless you Michael Bay!!!

  • July 2, 2007, 3:09 p.m. CST

    Unicron and Primus,Primus gave life to the transformers

    by Screentime

    in the comics... and both of the characters were from a neighbouring universe I would imagine. Remember when humans thought there was only one land mass and the earth was round and the sun was the only sun and galaxy was the only galaxy? Well I think its fair to say that there are more than one universe as well so its just taking the whole mythology of story telling to another level. Beyond the stars.<p><p>This is where film SHOULD be going. Star Wars was from the 70s, film storytelling should be traversing the universe by now.

  • July 2, 2007, 3:11 p.m. CST

    I was being ironic at the end....

    by pdennett316

    so please, no reactionary bullshit from the braindead and generally hard-of-thinking please.

  • July 2, 2007, 3:11 p.m. CST

    pdennet

    by Screentime

    Yes the cartoons were toy commercials but the mythology behind it was deep. All anyone wanted was someone to fill in the blanks, connect the dots and write a cool story around an existing, awesome mythology.

  • July 2, 2007, 3:12 p.m. CST

    The comedy with the parents

    by messi

    was funny and if you didn't think it was funny then you sound super jaded and elitist, i didn't think bumblebee peeing on simmons was funny but everyone else thought it was, they also thought the comedy with the parents was the funniest in the movie and taking that out would take away alot of the charm of the film.

  • July 2, 2007, 3:15 p.m. CST

    Meghan Fox

    by kafka07

    The hell with the robots, I'm just gonna see it for her, and that Australian hot chick too. I love being hetero.

  • July 2, 2007, 3:16 p.m. CST

    Screentime...

    by pdennett316

    To be honest, all I really watched of Transformers when I was a kid was the movie, was never into the series much. The thing is though, if a director chose to go that route with a film, deep mythology featuring giant robots, I truly doubt the film would be a success. Perhaps the second film will be slightly deeper a la Xmen 2, though if Bay directs again I doubt that'll happen.

  • July 2, 2007, 3:18 p.m. CST

    Liking Transformers Movie = Hetero....

    by pdennett316

    hating it = teh gayness.

  • July 2, 2007, 3:38 p.m. CST

    BRING IT!!!

    by Motoko Kusanagi

    TOTAL FUCKING DESTRUCTION GALORE!

  • July 2, 2007, 3:40 p.m. CST

    To all the haters....

    by bongo123

    You have been proven well and truly wrong! enjoy that humble pie you nerds

  • July 2, 2007, 3:46 p.m. CST

    PLANT!!!

    by Big Dick

    CAPONE IS A PLANT! MICHAEL BAY RAPED MY CHILDHOOD! WAAAAAAAAAAH!

  • July 2, 2007, 3:49 p.m. CST

    who is the arse trying to

    by gomez33

    who is the arse trying to find some hidden mythology in a shitty 80's cartoon. They are robots blowing shit up, nothing else to it. There never was. Thats why Bay has done an okay job. Though some of his action scenes really fuck me off in this film. Can't see what the hell is going on.

  • July 2, 2007, 3:52 p.m. CST

    Thanks for the spoiler warning

    by Razier

    ... bitch

  • July 2, 2007, 3:56 p.m. CST

    I have a question!!!

    by Strelnikov!

    I really really don't like Shia LaBeouf. Or Eli Roth. Or Sarah Silverman. Or Tom Rothman. Does that make me an anti-semite?

  • July 2, 2007, 3:57 p.m. CST

    So far I've been seeing the same reviews

    by DigitalDong

    The story is shit, but the effects are great, GO SEE IT!! Obviously this movie is what is...but I think the reason there are haters is because they know TF could have been more, alot more, than just a Michael Bay movie with ILM effects.

  • July 2, 2007, 3:57 p.m. CST

    Friggin' Fraggin'

    by pigsinspace

    This movie is awesome. It truly is. "I can't turn my brain off." Blah, blah, blah. You apparently just did if you can't enjoy this movie. I love deep, insightful movies, edgy innovative movies, odd, small foreign films -- I can appreciate so many different forms of movies. And, this one rocks, exceptionally well. If you can't open your mind that tiny bit, yeah, you will hate this movie. But, seriously, I fail to see why you are on this site at all, then. This is AintItCool... and giant robots are COOL.

  • July 2, 2007, 4 p.m. CST

    bongo123

    by BadMrWonka

    thanks for proving my point yet again...

  • July 2, 2007, 4:07 p.m. CST

    DigitalDong

    by Datascream

    what exactly could have been more? The damn story line for the cartoon was weak all on it's own. How is a live-action movie going to be any different? The story in the animated movie made no sense except Unicron was coming to eat everyone. Anything regarding Transformers can only be told on a basic or weak level. I just seriously can't see what everyone is complaining about.

  • July 2, 2007, 4:15 p.m. CST

    FAR too many reviews...

    by spencey7

    ...are doing the following: "TRANSFORMERS doesn't require such depths [of character development]." Then going on to say: "I have zero history with any incarnation of the Transformers, but I'M GUESSING that didn't really make any difference in my evaluation of the film." Oh well, as long as the whole thing gets jumped-up wannabe jocks masturbating over military fire-power, then we should all be happy. BIG EXPLOSIONS~!!!!!!

  • July 2, 2007, 4:20 p.m. CST

    "Evening" or "License to Wed" for everyone else...

    by pigsinspace

    Transformers has a story that serves the exact purpose it needs to. It is actually a much better story than I expected. Shia, also, was much better than I expected. I knew the huge robots with explosions was going to be enough to entertain me and it did. It was well worth my time. If you don't think that it would be a fun time, kudos to you -- don't go. But, wow, you must be a miserable person to hang around. No sense of escapism / fun. And, please, don't claim that you do, because you don't.

  • July 2, 2007, 4:21 p.m. CST

    Coming from someone that despised X3...

    by AdrianVeidt

    I find myself in the opposite boat now. I'm not a fanboy of Transformers, so I'm completely okay with watching a movie that entertains and I will have no room for disappointment. I am and always will be an avid fan of XMen so I about shit a brick when I saw how horrible X3 was. After awhile, and a forced second viewing, I tried to appreciate the film for it was was from an outsider perspective, from someone not caught up in the fandom, but rather a moviegoer looking for a summer flick. Though I haven't yet seen it, I feel that Transformers will be better at this than X3 was. I don't think it will piss off any fans to the extreme that X3 did, and I REALLY doubt there will be a line like "I'm the Megatron, BITCH!" Dear god, I hope there won't be.

  • July 2, 2007, 4:37 p.m. CST

    He like Turturro

    by Fabulous Freak

    But Massa didn't. Huh.

  • July 2, 2007, 4:44 p.m. CST

    I love how Star Wars...

    by chi3fhog

    is suddenly the pinnacle of excellent dialog. It was one of the first "event" movies and had a wonderful mythology behind it. That being said: I will always love the original trilogy, but most of what is said in the first one is utterly embarrassing.

  • July 2, 2007, 5:03 p.m. CST

    Linkin Park?

    by DamnYouMB

    Is their Transformers theme in this movie?

  • July 2, 2007, 5:03 p.m. CST

    His name is BUMBLEBEE, ASSKNUCKLE.

    by LordEnigma

    Jesus Capaone, you must have turned off your brain because you forgot the name BUMBLEBEE. Seriously you never turn your brain off. If you did, then living would be one hell of a bitch. So stop it with your analogies and let people like what they like. It's a big world of cinema out there. Why quantify it so damn much?

  • July 2, 2007, 5:04 p.m. CST

    "Where character development isn't necessary."

    by superninja

    Capone wouldn't have even had a review without this point. A little manufactured.

  • July 2, 2007, 5:06 p.m. CST

    Most of these reviews by AICN seem to just attempt

    by superninja

    to stir the pot as it were. They also are making it glaringly obvious the film is mediocre.

  • July 2, 2007, 5:06 p.m. CST

    Will someone please realise...

    by spencey7

    ...that this movie shouldn't just be about "BIG FUCKING ROBOTS BLOWING SHIT UP~!!!!" regardless of how much that entertains your typical mentally-challenged (and Republican) Bay fan. It should be about TRANSFORMERS, for which character and character development is key. A classic reason as to why this project was doomed from the get-go.

  • July 2, 2007, 5:08 p.m. CST

    No, Mute Math, do the THEME.

    by LordEnigma

    Yes...MUTE MATH! This generations' LION! You dont know LION? REMEMBER!

  • July 2, 2007, 5:11 p.m. CST

    Travelling thru hyperspace ain't like dusting crops boy

    by Orionsangels

    You're right! Amazing dialogue

  • July 2, 2007, 5:11 p.m. CST

    Spency get over it.

    by LordEnigma

    The tranformer stories suck, but the characters mean a lot to us. That's the thing about all of this. These characters mean the world to us, but they existed in really shitty stories. So it's a give and take, and people love giant fucking robots. Stop hating on a spectacle!

  • July 2, 2007, 5:13 p.m. CST

    Who was bigger than Unicron?

    by Orionsangels

    SunStar, he was a transformer that turned into a Sun. No I just made that up.

  • July 2, 2007, 5:21 p.m. CST

    "I'm the Megatron. Bitch!"

    by mrdinky

    ROFLMAO ah. that was great! (I hope it's not in the movie either, but great talkback!)

  • July 2, 2007, 5:23 p.m. CST

    All these "positive" reviews read like...

    by rbatty024

    the writer was cringing while writing it. "Well...the effects look cool and things did blow up...I guess it was good." They come to the thumbs up/thumbs down part and deliver the verdict with a resounding shrug. Not terribly impressive.

  • July 2, 2007, 5:28 p.m. CST

    LordEnigma

    by Screentime

    You dont know shit buddy. The stories were freaking ccol. how they introdced characters all the time. there was always some cool way they did it. Megatron could have just built the 5 Combaticons as a new way to defeat the Autobots. but NO. Starscream was banished from the Decepticons so he travelled to Cybertron to escape 5 Renegade Decepticons from Decepticon jail. (thats right these 5 Decepticons were TOO BAD TO BE DECEPTICONS) So starscream broke their personality chips out of Decepticon jail and gave them all new bodies on Earth to defeat Megatron. At the end Megatron brings out Devastator and Starscream says "I have prepared for this..COMBATICONS MERGE TO FORM BRUTICUS!!!" Then Bruticus kicks Devestators ass. That shit is awesome right there.......sure some shallow shit but as a general outline of a story BAD ASS. And thats why Transformers will always kick ass.

  • July 2, 2007, 5:29 p.m. CST

    Saw it...

    by Tourist

    Very annoyed that it was too loud to sleep through. I'm either the wrong audience for this film, or I share a planet with severely limited people whose imaginations and abillity to process and explore new ideas has become so stunted that they find this repetitive, dull, noisy film entertaining. Probally the most boring film I have seen in a cinema this past year. However LeBouf was as good as he could be, and despite trying to not to, I found Megan Fox quite stunning. On the other level, the production itself looked like shit. And as realistic as the CG looked...it still looked like CG.

  • July 2, 2007, 5:30 p.m. CST

    rbatty, I think it is undeniable that people are having

    by superninja

    fun watching the movie. Something about it works for them.

  • July 2, 2007, 5:30 p.m. CST

    Oh Oh Screentime!

    by BillyPilgrim

    You went and underestimated the power of the force. Better watch your back dog! Vader is gonna bitch slap the midichlorians out of you!

  • July 2, 2007, 5:32 p.m. CST

    Oh, I should add...

    by Tourist

    That I was possibly alone in my opinion of this movie at the showing I went to. The majority of the audience, except an older couple who walked out, went fucking nuts for it. Especially the garden bit. There were a row of semi literate text aholics in front of me who laughed all the way into the next scene.

  • July 2, 2007, 5:33 p.m. CST

    What is interesting is that a couple of the negative

    by superninja

    reviews are annoyed that Bay stocked it with his cliche human characters and people wanted to see more of the robots. Gosh, ya think?

  • July 2, 2007, 5:36 p.m. CST

    some characters werent introduced at all..lol

    by Bouncy X

    i was watchin the dvds a while back and there's this 2 part episode and when part 2 starts, suddenly Cosmos is there without explanation as if he's always been around when that was his first appearance. and he's just one of many who just appeared out of the blue. but hey, it was the 80s so its part of the charm of it all. lol. as for the live action movie, why are those against still complaining? its done, its in theaters tonight, some will like it and others wont. but who cares anymore, if you truly think its shit then dont go see it and get over it so u can moan about another movie thats coming. and those who have or want to see it, well go and enjoy urselves. not that there was to begin with but there's nothing left to defend or attack. its like those who arent happy cant handle someone enjoying it and then those enjoying it cant handle someone not wanting to see it or hating it if they have seen it already. as i said before, some people dont understand the concept of opinion. off topic, i just saw die hard 4 and yeah, u could so see all the edits and dubs for the language, it was sorta funny. planned to be PG from the get go my ass. lol

  • July 2, 2007, 5:43 p.m. CST

    Dear Fanboys,

    by BillyPilgrim

    If you have so much invested into cartoon characters from the 80's that you have a shit fit over the characterization, you really need to get a life. Try meeting new people. Get a pet. Seek therapy. Start drinking heavily. Move out of your parents basement. Sleep with a real woman. Don't think about your mom when sleeping with a woman. Sell all your worldly possessions and become a professional hobo. Anything to improve your life at this point.

  • July 2, 2007, 5:49 p.m. CST

    Why the fuss over Transformers?

    by skimn

    Capone hit the debate of Bay's talent on the head. Bay has always seemed to be more interested in metal and plastic than flesh and bone, so he should be the perfect choice for Transformers. Even his emotional scenes were fake and "plastic". And I'm not familiar with the Transformers mythos, so beyond giant robots beatin' up on one another, what is there....? Oh yes, its a movie based on friggin toys...!

  • July 2, 2007, 5:51 p.m. CST

    be careful SoylentMean

    by Bouncy X

    someone's gonna bring up some giant robot movie they think had logic to use "against you"...and going by how predictable this place is, my bets are on Iron Giant. lol

  • July 2, 2007, 5:52 p.m. CST

    That was....

    by PirateEmery

    .... short? Mori's seemed a lot longer.

  • July 2, 2007, 5:53 p.m. CST

    Something I find amusing

    by DrPeterVenkman

    Is the people who are so Anti-ILM or Anti-WETA. Albeit, there is not alot of that on here, but there is some. I can understand being for or against this movie for whatever your reasons are, but what does a special effects outfit have to do to get on your shitlist? <p> This is not a bust on anybody and, believe me, I won't try to talk bad about anyone's right to hate anything, but I just don't understand it. To me, it's like saying fuck you Dasani bottled water, Deer Park is winning the best bottled water award this year!

  • July 2, 2007, 5:59 p.m. CST

    Tourist...

    by pigsinspace

    If you think you are "the wrong audience for this film," then, you are.

  • July 2, 2007, 6:02 p.m. CST

    I want logic in all my movies. I want all movies

    by superninja

    to be honest portrayals of human behavior. Unless they are specifically being contrary, and then you can appreciate it on that level.

  • July 2, 2007, 6:11 p.m. CST

    Tell us Gus...

    by BillyPilgrim

    Is the movie this years "Little Miss Sunshine"?

  • July 2, 2007, 6:12 p.m. CST

    FINALLY!!!

    by Hamish

    A movie (and a big one at that!) opens here in NZ first! I saw it last week! I can read these reviews with absolutely no fear of spoilers! Here's a spoiler for you - Megan Fox will give you wood! Even if you're a woman! That's how hot she is! Exclamation marks! It's that kind of movie!

  • July 2, 2007, 6:18 p.m. CST

    Sci-Fi can have logic

    by Big Dick

    Look at the Iron Giant!

  • July 2, 2007, 6:21 p.m. CST

    Exclamation marks!

    by DrPeterVenkman

    Heh

  • July 2, 2007, 6:21 p.m. CST

    Leme sum up Transformers for ya...

    by LargoJr

    Original steel toys = TOTALLY Kewl >_< New Plastic cheap toys = GHAAAYYYYYYY

  • July 2, 2007, 6:21 p.m. CST

    Is it just me. . .

    by Big Dick

    or did you all have friends in high school and college who hated action movies but went to see them anyway and then complained about how they sucked afterwards?

  • July 2, 2007, 6:24 p.m. CST

    FUCK TRANSFORMERS, BRING ON THE THUNDERCATS!!!

    by FrankTheCrank

    And while your at it, do a porn version of Strawberry Shortcake. FU ALL!!

  • July 2, 2007, 6:36 p.m. CST

    FUCK THUNDERCATS BRING ON SILVERHAWKS!

    by DOGSOUP

    WAIT! BRING ON SPEED RAC.........oh.

  • July 2, 2007, 6:39 p.m. CST

    FUCK SPEED RACER...THUNDERCATS, HO!!!

    by FrankTheCrank

    Transformers is gay.

  • July 2, 2007, 6:40 p.m. CST

    Action and cool VFX are all i ask of this film.

    by knifeandfork

    As long as transformers is full of cool action, state of the art special effects and a few laughs here and there, i'll be satisfied.That may sound superficial but come on, what more can i ask of a michael bay giant robot movie based on toys, huh? Character development? Intircate plotting ? Artistic integrity? Nope. I want an entertaining film in which giant robots beat each other up.And it looks like thatS what will be delivered.

  • July 2, 2007, 6:55 p.m. CST

    JaySmack

    by JaySmack

    "These alien robots were introduced as toys and a cartoon series, so to pile on motivation and anything beyond a surface-level mythology would be foolish and unnecessary." Then I trust we won't have to hear you bitching anymore about the quality of the Pirates of the Carribean movies. After all, they were based on a theme park ride! Not even a toy or a cartoon, both of which usually come with back stories lending themselves (indeed requiring) fleshing out and developing. I love how free swag from Bay makes the would-be discriminating tastes of AICN's crack (or is it crackhead?) staff of critics drool on themselves as they say, "Who cares if the movies shit, Bay makes things go BOOM!" Star calling this site Ain't It Crap News if you're going to go down this route. Either that or have the decency to at least list how much a studio has to pay to get you guys to shamelessly pimp their movie like you're doing this one.

  • July 2, 2007, 7:04 p.m. CST

    JaySmack

    by JaySmack

    Amazing how the guys on this site who give this flick positive reviews all have to start by saying the cartoon sucked and how stupid the fans are. Then they have to say later on "I don't believe in telling people to turn off your brains in order to enjoy a movie, but this movie is great because all you have to do is turn off your brain..." Isn't this hypocrisy? No, it's just kissing Bay's and the studio's asses so you can keep getting free swag from them and keep getting "access" which apparently means memo's from the studio telling you to defend their shitbombs against any and all criticism, even when it makes you look ridiculous. This site doesn't need PLANTS, it's already a propaganda mill. Classy fellas, real classy.

  • July 2, 2007, 7:11 p.m. CST

    F(GUNSHOT) THUNDERCATS, BRING ON THE THUNDERBIRDS!

    by Pennsy

    Yes.

  • July 2, 2007, 7:31 p.m. CST

    Billy Pilgrim Grow Up and Move Out of Your Moms House

    by JaySmack

    Anyone who likes this stupid movie is probably ten years old, mastubates at even the mention of Bay's name, rode the short bus to school or gets up in the morning and asks their mother if they can bring some friends home tonight. What could possibly make my point on how STUPID the supporters of this film are than the fact that they boldly proclaim, "We WANT a stupid movie! We don't care if the movie's bad, or that it has no story or that it's just stupid!" Yep, idiots begging for idiotic movies. What entertains the ignorant.

  • July 2, 2007, 7:56 p.m. CST

    Why is it out today?

    by darquelyte

    When the release date was supposed to be Wednesday? When did this change? I'm surprised it's in theaters now.

  • July 2, 2007, 7:57 p.m. CST

    LOL Liking a movie=propaganda mills

    by andrew coleman

    That made me fucking laugh. Some of you guys don't seem to realize that you belong to a very fucking small minority of people who give a shit about the mythology of Transformers. Also Jaysmack only the ignorant try and belittle people for what they like to watch. How is it bad that people like to watch Robots blowing shit up? You want a subtle movie with characters go see Evening, you won't because all you guys look for is something to rant about. Sadly for nerds like us will rarely ever get a true to form version of anything we've ever loved because frankly we are a minority. They are trying to make lots of money, how do you do that during the summer? Fill a movie with action and stupid comedy bits. They have done that here but the battles are AMAZING to witness and that is all. If you can't handle that you seriously need to calm down and go watch the cartoon again it is that simple, you don't need to go hating on people who want to go see the movie.

  • July 2, 2007, 8:14 p.m. CST

    I Don't Get It.

    by truthmaster

    Why do people go to theme parks and ride the rides there? There's no real story behind a simple roller coaster, but people stand in line and ride them over and over. Some people like to watch the news, partake in political debates or catch a play and philosophize about the meaning of life. Some people like to go the beach and do nothing, but have a good time. Why can't a person do both? Why can't a movie just be entertaining and fun. Isn't there enough real stuff in the world to think about? Do we need to think about it ALL the time? Why can't some movies be like an amusement park ride...you know, FUN?

  • July 2, 2007, 8:19 p.m. CST

    MICHAEL BAY OWNS THE HATERS

    by Logan_1973

    Haters be silenced. This movie is a tremendous piece of filmmaking. I got to see an early screening and I can't wait to go again. Bay has proven everyone wrong and I'm glad for it. This film makes G1 look exactly what it was: A TOY CARTOON.

  • July 2, 2007, 9:19 p.m. CST

    Even if its a decent movie, the haters aren't "owned"

    by GibsonUSA Returns

    ...imo.<BR><BR> I mean, a lot of TF fans wanted a movie that respected the franchise and its origin story. TF is deeper than you think. So even if this movie a a "big loud dumb fun movie" and is entertaining and fun to watch, I don't see how haters are "owned". Think about what could have been.<BR><BR> That being said I have nothing against Michael Bay. I hope this movie is great, but I hope Bay fixes the designs for the sequel. Flames on Optimus are never good. Bay should at least give in a LITTLE BIT to the TF purists.

  • July 2, 2007, 9:20 p.m. CST

    The way I see it...

    by Mentieth

    I didn't exactly grow up with Transformers. I watched the reruns of the old show on TV, and the movie was the only video I rented from our town's first rental store. I liked the Transformers, and I still have a load of the toys that I bought as a kid. But looking back on it, I don't think I was as into it as some people here are, so I won't play this from the fanboy route. I caught the tail end of the Transformers "craze", and I it was something I liked. And looking back on it, the reason I watched the cartoon and kept renting that movie is the same reason I'll be seeing this movie on Wednesday with my friends: because there are giant robots that transform into vehicles fighting. I didn't get the mythology then because I was too young, and now that I do know it, I find it to be just as silly and cartoonish as this movie looks. Also, I may be the only one who does this apparently, but plot holes and such don't seem to affect me. If we're gonna sit here and think about the movie, why not fix the plot holes while we're at it? I mean, I can pretty much imagine anything is possible to help my suspension of disbelief. That's probably why I watched the cartoon as a kid and liked it, and why I can watch this movie and like it. I don't see plot holes as problems, but rather, opportunities for me to figure them out. So, having said that, I will say that I will be seeing this movie, and in doing so, I will not care one lick what the mythology was or what the characterizations are. All that matters to me is what I see in the movie and read in the prequel novel. And no matter what, I'm sure that Michael Bay will entertain me enough for it to be worth my money as he always does.

  • July 2, 2007, 10:01 p.m. CST

    knifeandfork dickhead

    by messi

    transformers had great character development, that's what made it so memorable. the fact you assume so little makes you an idiot.

  • July 2, 2007, 10:07 p.m. CST

    TRANSFORMERS DELIVERS! HATER FANBOYS DENIED

    by LORDRANDO

    Saw it. Its not Bergman, its Bay. You wanted it. You got it. Robots in DISGUISE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • July 2, 2007, 10:22 p.m. CST

    SHIA & CULLEN'S NARRATION=THE ONLY REASONS TO SEE THIS.

    by Shermdawg

    Yep.

  • July 2, 2007, 10:27 p.m. CST

    I'm sorry that I doubted Micheal Bay

    by Angelus_420

    He did an amazing job! All you fanboys can go to hell cause if you hate this film after seeing it you have no clue anyways. Lame jokes??? This whole movie worked even the house scene as cheese as it was worked! As for the character development well I don't what TF you watched Capone but I thought it was good. There were reason for the humans to be with the Autobots and not just put there to add human elements. What more do you want the movie is 1 of at least 3 we can develop the characters of the Autobots and the humans as the series continues but for this movie they were good. Nickpicking about that is a pretty big bitch move dude. The theater I was in was packed and everyone was completely blown away by this film. The only negative thing I will say is that at some points I had trouble figuring out which Decepticon was which because most looked alike. I'm talking about the end stuff in the city where you can't tell Megatron from Starscream. Other than that I would say this movie was an A with a little room for improvement.

  • July 2, 2007, 10:34 p.m. CST

    you know what

    by RubenDaniel

    My wife got sick from the near epileptic inducing frenetic action shaky cam quick cuts. She's never gotten sick before. She doesn't have epilepsy. Most of that action was just poorly filmed. Bunch of parts flying everywhere...sigh...

  • July 2, 2007, 10:38 p.m. CST

    Just saw it. Starscream was the shit.

    by eggbeater

    Alot of the film was sooo ridiculous and it felt mostly like a car commercial. But it was a great time at the movies.

  • July 2, 2007, 10:49 p.m. CST

    Good Flick

    by Alientoast

    I liked it. BumbleBee rocked and old school Prime voice rocked too. And surprisingly, the two human "kid" helpers weren't annoying! On a side note, what the FUCK was that trailer that played before the movie? The one with the explosions in the city and the monster roar and the Statue of Liberty's head getting punted? Godzilla? Gamera? C'Thulu? Anyone got a clue?

  • July 2, 2007, 10:53 p.m. CST

    Gus Van Rant

    by Logan_1973

    Keep playing with your TF dolls.

  • July 2, 2007, 10:57 p.m. CST

    TINO

    by haitu

    MICHAEL BAY read out text: TRANSFORMERS IN NAME ONLY!

  • July 2, 2007, 11:01 p.m. CST

    Starscream WAS the shit, no doubt!

    by Grayle

    Hopefully he gets some real dialogue on the next movie, but damn, what he lacked in words, he made up for in whoop'n ass... And personally i thought John Turturro's character was one of the weakest points of the movie, that actually took it down a notch (a bit too hokeyish, even in a movie about giant robots), but hell, with everything else, it was easy to overlook...The frantic battles, did mess with your head some, but i liked how it was done, like a real fuck'n battle! not the camera all perfectly centered on every movement of action, all nice and tidy... there was shit flying everywhere, it was chaotic, jets and choppers were flying this way and that, buildings were getting ripped apart by gunfire...it was a awesome... and it was something different for a change... i'll take it!

  • July 2, 2007, 11:08 p.m. CST

    Actually, effects were done by DIGITAL DOMAIN

    by Dallas1701D

    The new owners of Hollywood effects. Love ILM, but credit where credit is due.

  • July 2, 2007, 11:09 p.m. CST

    Just Saw It!

    by Mad-Maximus

    That was one of the most amazing movies I have seen in a long time! The whole movie crowd was into it and I am speaking on behalf of my friends but we thought the movie effing rocked!!! I really do not care what you hardcore fans think, "TINO", "Bay ruined my childhood", all the whining things you guys have posted; all I care about is that I saw a movie that I plan on seeing again. At the theatre I saw it at, every show was sold out tonight with long lines waiting and when you were leaving you could hear everybody talking how great it was. It's funny how you guys try to nitpick everything but who cares! From the beginning to the end we were all hooked and thats all I care.

  • July 2, 2007, 11:10 p.m. CST

    Fucking. Awsome. i had so many "oh fuck" moments

    by wcoop893

    during this movie. strangely though, my theater was half empty. because its a monday? anyways, everyone who saw it loved the shit out of it, great applause at the end.

  • July 2, 2007, 11:15 p.m. CST

    Loved the film, but my only question in the films logic

    by Dallas1701D

    Is why the transformers had the ability to scan and change into anything they chose, and could "change" that chosen form at any time (ala old camaro/new camaro) then why did they have to keep those elemental details as robots? I know to keep some kind of iconic look to the characters, but I would think Prime wouldnt want Side View Mirrors hanging off of his boobs.

  • July 2, 2007, 11:17 p.m. CST

    "Starscream is here" that was a MAJOR geek out moment.

    by kikuchiyoboy

    Fun movie. But you definitely don't want to sit too close to the screen.

  • July 2, 2007, 11:24 p.m. CST

    THANK YOU MICHAEL BAY!!!!!

    by NubtheSquirrel

    That's right Haters, Michael Bay just owned your asses! The flick rocked hard! The action was kick ass. The babe was hot and Shi LeBouf was funny as all shit. Cry yourselves to sleep because you were WRONG! Flames on Optimus=nipples on Batman? I don't think so! You are so busy looking at other things, that you don't even notice the fucking flames! TINO? Fuck that. This is badass and hardcore Transformers all the way through. I am a fucking die hard fan from the 80's cartoon. Was my childhood raped? Nope. Did I feel like a kid again? Hell yes. Bring on the sequel! Bring on the Dinobots!

  • July 2, 2007, 11:27 p.m. CST

    Nothing beats the logic of a certain frozen character.

    by kikuchiyoboy

    1930s? How did they freeze that dude? That's a lot of ice. Must of shared the boat ride with Mr King Kong. <br> <br> Hee hee. The only thing I didn't really dig was Jazz's character. He was more refined in the cartoon. But honestly I still can't believe they made Transformers into a movie. A movie that set up it's own universe efficiently. <br> <br> I mean it a movie about robots basically fighting for their next meal. Yet it still worked and was a decent time at the movies. I just wish that Bay would back up the camera little and give room for the audience to soak it all in. There's a lot of metal on metal going on.

  • July 2, 2007, 11:29 p.m. CST

    Dallas1701D

    by Chairman_Kaga

    Your wrong. While Digital Domain did a small amount of farmed out work ILM was responsible for the bulk of the FX.

  • July 2, 2007, 11:31 p.m. CST

    I think

    by RubenDaniel

    if you guys call calm down and let the loud pretty explosions and nice visual effects pass, you can sit down and discuss why this movie was really really poor.

  • July 2, 2007, 11:33 p.m. CST

    Alientoast it was "Cloverfield".

    by kikuchiyoboy

    At first I thought it was a coke commercial. Here's the aintitcool link: <br> <br> http://tinyurl.com/37dnyr

  • July 2, 2007, 11:45 p.m. CST

    You guys

    by WolfmanNards

    No. I was prepared to be entertained. I dealt with the setup. Okay, fine, do what you gotta do to get to the point where the transformers battle. Are you done? No? Okay. I waited, and waited, and finally when the battle came. When the action BEGAN, which is like the last 10 minutes. All they did was FUCKING CUT TO THE PEOPLE! During the fight between prime and megatron, YOU SAW LIKE 1 FUCKING PUNCH! FUCK ANYBODY THAT LIKED THIS! There was nothing in it. I waited, and I waited. PATIENTLY! FOr what? There is no redeeming quality to this film.

  • July 2, 2007, 11:49 p.m. CST

    You don't even see the transformers

    by WolfmanNards

    The rare moments when the transformers are on screen, ITS FUCKING SHAKY CAM! Theyre hard enough to look at already let alone this shaky shit. Anybody that liked this is an ape. You're entertained by ANYTHING. Well Im gonna take a shit soon, come check it out if you want, I'm sure you'll love the show. FUcking dipshits. You're hurting the cause. You're all gonna see this over and over again, and people are gonna think that this is what the standard should be. FUCK YOU GUYS. I FUCKING HATED THIS MOVIE. This isn't coming from the perspective of a fan, it's from a guy that just wanted to see a movie that didn't suck.

  • July 2, 2007, 11:57 p.m. CST

    I agree wolfman nards

    by RubenDaniel

    100 percent. Bay's style is an insult. he even recycled two action scenes from his previous films. Bad Boys 2 when the robot was behind the column and the island with optimus falling down a huge building with shia and him living

  • July 3, 2007, 12:17 a.m. CST

    Damn. What a ride.

    by Se7en

    I'm such a Bay fan. My dream project for Bay is to make a Super hero movie with NO TIES to DC or Marvel, the hero being a Superman-like powers, maybe throw in some quasar powers, have the script made by the Wachowkies, NO HUMOR especially toilet humor.. (ah Bay, why would you go there ? It really drags your work down so low when your technical level is so above everybody else... argh!!!! ), and leave the script untouched.... I promise you gentlemen, he... will.... RULE.

  • July 3, 2007, 12:39 a.m. CST

    Now that's a fucking movie.

    by LordEnigma

    And the glasses are not a MacGuffin. They are a tangible part of the plot. Seriously, you cannot follow a fucking TRANSFORMERS MOVIE PLOT? Seriously? And I do know shit buddy. Im just not as clueless as you fucking are.

  • July 3, 2007, 12:46 a.m. CST

    Transformers in Name Only is some WEAK SHIT.

    by LordEnigma

    Seriously fuck those who came up with that week shit. If you do not see how that's PRIME and the other AUTOBOTS. If you do not get how the PRIME couldnt KILL HIS BROTHER. If you dont get any of this. You are a fucking biased jackass that deserves a good kick in the cheeks.

  • July 3, 2007, 12:49 a.m. CST

    A MINDLESS SPECTACLE? FUCK YOU.

    by LordEnigma

    Seriously if you hate this fucking movie. If you hate on it for some lame ass reasons. I should throw down on you with all the FUCKING LOVE I STILL HAVE FOR G1. Dont fucking tell me what's TRANSFORMERS OR NOT ... you egotistical asshat. This is TRANSFORMERS. If you dont like it. Get that rod out of your ass and give it a chance.

  • July 3, 2007, 12:49 a.m. CST

    A little silly, but it worked

    by bib fortuna

    for me anyway. The jokes were..well..way way over the top. And y'know, somehow I enjoyed it. Anyone expecting a hardcore sci-fi flick with deep social commentary was in the wrong theater. The film reminded me a lot of the cartoons I watched after school in the 80s. Yeah I wanted to see more of the action, but action films nowadays, not just Bay, seem to value speed over detail. Probably so they don't have to work too hard on the CGI. And anyone who was a fan of the original cartoon had to feel a shiver of joy at certain points. Lines from the film that made me smile "Autobots move out!" "Once again you've failed me, Starscream!" "It's you and me, Megatron." "No, it's just me, Prime!"

  • July 3, 2007, 12:56 a.m. CST

    True fan? You can determine what makes a fan cunt?

    by LordEnigma

    Seriously you ignorant ass. If you would watch the film instead of being blindingly pissed off at it. I would get where you are it. Again, I get the GEEK FEVER you are in, because I have had it countless times. Nevertheless, get the fuck over it, and realized that you losed. This is transformers. This is what kicks these characters up another level. If you dont want that. If you want it all to yourself. Fuck you because of your arrogant attitude.

  • July 3, 2007, 1:11 a.m. CST

    Just saw a Sneek Peek

    by ShiniGamiSan

    I liked it. I didn't love it. I agree with the review above, alot could have been cut or were characters who never really did anything. Also, maybe even more development for the Transformers. Minor Spoiler, Jazz gets ripped in half, and you have no idea who he is, so it's just like some robot out of nowhere gets killed. And some robots just seem to disappear, never to be seen again. But the FX are pure eye candy.

  • July 3, 2007, 1:38 a.m. CST

    WAY to much shakey-cam...

    by Darth_Inedible

    Overall the movie wasn't bad but the overuse of fucking shakey-cam ruined most of the third act for me. When you can actually see the TFs, like the few shots of them standing still in broad daylight at the end they look fabulous. The shakey cam ruined it because A: the designs are already so overwrought and complex that unstable camerawork often turns the characters into visual gibberish and B: ILM hasn't figured out how to make their CG motion blur integrate with live action shakey-cam, so we get smeary transformers against the blurred live action plates. MR BAY, it can be visceral without being unintelligable. Slightly simpler character design and and slightly less shakey cam would have greatly improved this film.

  • July 3, 2007, 1:43 a.m. CST

    I FUCKING LOVED IT

    by flipster

    Optimus is fucking awesome - that dude kills. Looking forward to sequels! Hope they have enoough cash to make big film..mo money puleeze. Worth every cent all away round - sure there are holes but what the fuck ever - nothing can detract from that shit - it was a blast!

  • July 3, 2007, 2:17 a.m. CST

    Is it me or are Michael Bay movies just a little racist

    by clone-o-mat

    ?? Seriously. Not a lot racist, just a little bit racist. I always feel just a little bit uncomfortable during his inevitable "black people are hilarious" moments, but it keeps happening and no one ever mentions it. I think I need some perspective here. So, how about it talkbackers...is it just me? (PS pull back the camera a little, why doncha?)

  • July 3, 2007, 2:19 a.m. CST

    and why do black people always die?

    by s0beurself

    ok, so it was a robot (jazz), but it was black, and it got ripped in half. wtf? oh, and yeah, the movie still rocked.

  • July 3, 2007, 2:40 a.m. CST

    damn

    by s0beurself

    The cartoon was different from the comics, the movie was different from the cartoon - but the basics stayed the same: giant robots fighting, and it was awesome. damn, leave it at that haters.

  • July 3, 2007, 2:54 a.m. CST

    sobeurself

    by Joe Huber

    The difference between the comics, cartoon and movie is that the comics and cartoon had stories. They had 3-dimensional characters. Hard to believe but those characters were more real than anything in this movie, including the humans.

  • July 3, 2007, 3:09 a.m. CST

    To anyone who calls this 'TINO'

    by GilesT

    Its a business, and less people would've gone to see the version you wanted.<br> <br>Multi-million dollar movies are made to appeal to as many demographics as possible. Not just the little bitches who get upset if one of the characters didn't look exactly the same way as they did in a 20-year old cartoon.

  • July 3, 2007, 3:10 a.m. CST

    i admit no story...but

    by s0beurself

    it's the summer, and noisy shit sells. yes, there are movies that blend action and story well, and yes, I admit the movie lacked the epic feel it may have had with some more depth. BUT, because the action was handled so well, i accept it as a fun ride with a dash of nostalgia. where X-3 and spiderman 3 were too fcked up to forgive, Transformers delivered on enough levels for me. And who knows, if it does spawn sequels, maybe they'll flesh out the story element. . . *cough* maybe

  • July 3, 2007, 3:45 a.m. CST

    This movie F'ING SUCKED!! This web page LIED TO ME!!

    by GibsonUSA Returns

    I am f'ing pissed!What the F*** was that??????? <BR><BR> This webpage was hyping up THAT CRAP?????? It was just 2.5 hours of stupid jokes! It was embarassing! The only redeeming quality was the very very end, but by then the lame cheesy jokes already killed it. <BR><BR> WHY DID YOU LIE TO ME????? Seriously, why did you lie to me?? Yes, I had been trashing the designs, but I repeated over and over again that I hoped the movie itself would be good. You guys got me hyped up. WHY????? NO, it's not even good for a mindless movie. It's not good for ANY movie. The whole crowd walked out depressed. Live Free was so much SO MUCH better. OMG how could you lie to me......f'ng robots hiding around a house....WTF....

  • July 3, 2007, 3:51 a.m. CST

    This movie isn't even good for "noisy sh*t!"

    by GibsonUSA Returns

    Live Free was a highly entertaining, mindless popcorn movie. I can accept such a movie. But Transformers was UTTER CRAP!!<BR><BR> I cannot believe people can find time to defend this utter garbage! It was just 2.5 hours of stupid jokes! Bunch of humans cracking retarded one liners that a Disney Channel movie would reject! Robots hiding around the house....pee jokes...oblivious doofus parents...one-liners galore...the bored operater...the nerdy Sector 7 agent....WTF???? It's just total garbage! Stupid kiddie jokes for 2 hours.<BR><BR> Michael Bay is not to blame here. It's the hopeless script. It was just so retarded and un-Transformers. And weren't the Decepticons supposed to refuse to speak English?? How come Megatron ONLY speaks english????

  • July 3, 2007, 4 a.m. CST

    So a popcorn movie requires this level of kiddie jokes?

    by GibsonUSA Returns

    It requires a little dog peeing on an Autobot? It requires oblivious goofy parents? <BR><BR> It's giant robots blowing shit up? Last I checked the humans hogged the screen.<BR><BR> ANd I am working on my doctorate. You?

  • July 3, 2007, 4:07 a.m. CST

    Die Hard and Jurassic Park.

    by GibsonUSA Returns

    Both fun popcorn movies. Did they require kiddie humor the level of Bumblebee peeing on an FBI agent? Anthony Anderson screaming at the screen? Goofy moms giggling at a girl in her sons room? Autobots parked in the backyard?<BR> What about Batman Begins?

  • July 3, 2007, 4:08 a.m. CST

    daMN

    by slkboxrman

    wolf without nads gets around when he wants to bash a movie....

  • July 3, 2007, 4:12 a.m. CST

    not to be cold

    by slkboxrman

    but from the VERY FEW crying folk in the room "why did u lie to me !!!!" i hope u commit suicide and put urselves out of your misery....u would think someone stole your first girlfriends bra that u had bronzd cuz that was the only ass u ever got...GTA ass dont count....buncha babies.....most reviews from the most adamant fanboys has been "OMG its fckin awesome"

  • July 3, 2007, 4:22 a.m. CST

    Where have I seen this before?

    by Mentieth

    Oh yeah, back in 2004 when the remake of Dawn of the Dead came out. Hardcore fans were calling it DINO and calling the movie shit right from the start. Why? Because the zombies ran. Stupid reasons to argue, just like the reasons we have here. Flames and lips on Optimus and the new designs. Really, when did this become such a problem? Personally, I prefer the new designs, because they just truly evoke that feel of robots in disguise for me so much more than the old cartoon designs did. So here's my point: regardless of the source material, a movie lives or dies depending on how well it caters to the target audience. And like it or not, that audience is not Transformers fanboys, but the public in general. This movie was, from the start, not made for the purists, regardless of what promises the director and writers may have made. And it seems that, from the early reviews, it is appealing well to most audiences, because the majority of them have no previous experience with the Transformers lore, and probably couldn't care less. Though the box office results will be the true decider of this, it seems that if the movie makes enough money, it will be a success regardless of what anyone thinks of it. Because, let's face it, when faced with money or opinions, studios will take the money every time.

  • July 3, 2007, 6:27 a.m. CST

    "LEFT CHEEK! LEFT CHEEK! LEFT CHEEK!"

    by spencey7

    Cringe-inducing and utterly embarassing. One reason the US is viewed the way it is internationally is because the majority of the population find stuff like this script funny.

  • July 3, 2007, 6:30 a.m. CST

    "[insert name here] OWNS YOUR ASS~!!!"

    by spencey7

    What does that even mean? To all the Bay fans complaining about "the haters": We don't like the movie - What right does that give you to attack us?

  • July 3, 2007, 6:32 a.m. CST

    spencey

    by Lost Prophet

    It should be<p>"[INSERT NAME HERE] PWNS YOUR ASS<P>I think it means that they were right and the "haters" such as me were wrong. <p>Kind of like an annoying child running in circles screaming "Told you so".

  • July 3, 2007, 6:48 a.m. CST

    STOP DOUBTING!!!!!

    by LORDRANDO

    Logic? Plot? Turturro? What the hell are you fanboys bitching about. . TF in name only? They are cool toys but the cartoon sux if u watch it grown up...talk about low budget...go watch Hostel or some other cheap thrill piece of shit. They so called, epileptic (which is not funny to joke about) frenzy of the qction is spot on. It puts the viewer in the melee a la Private Ryan. But this has giant FUCKING ROBOTS. Grow a pair fanboys, stop bitching, or go watch lifetime movies for plots you might like.

  • July 3, 2007, 6:50 a.m. CST

    Autobots, roll out

    by AKRay

    This film was great. People picking on dumb dialog, go back and watch the cartoon. It's a great balance between the old Transformers mythology and the new direction they are taking it. Prime and Megatron weren't brothers, just friends before Megatron turned. The humans hogged the screen? You must have been watching another flick, because this was action, a little dram, more action, a little drama, a shit load of action, then a little drama. I have been a fan of Transformers since I was 8 years old, that's going back 22 years. I had my doubts, but I think this might be the best action film I have ever seen. If you don't like this film, don't watch it. But you should know that Bumblebee should lubricate you!

  • July 3, 2007, 7:26 a.m. CST

    Wahh...wahhh

    by stoopidDclown

    You fucking jerkoffs really make me laugh. You talk about how wonderful the acting and character development was in STAR WARS. Look, I was one of the biggest star wars geeks that ever was (I never got a costume and went to a con dressed as a jedi, but then again, i'm not retarded) but I can still see it for what it was...a classic re-telling of old myths for a new age. The acting was crap, the dialouge was crap. You're all seeing it through the rose colored glasses of your childhood and while that's to be expected, it's also cutting the legs off your own argument. I went to see Transformers last night at the theater where I work and I enjoyed it. After it was over, I went into another aud where it was playing and I just watched the kids faces. I don't mean the "smarter than everyone" trans-tards that shit on this movie and every other film that doesn't capture the fantasies of their deluded minds perfectly. No I watched the REAL kids faces. They were enraptured. Their faces lit up everytime a robot was on screen. They almost cried when Bumblebee was taken down by the sector 7 guys and they cheered when he said, at the end, "I wish to stay with the boy". What I'm getting at is this: This film hit every mark for the audience last night. The adults liked it for what it was, summer entertainment, and the kids looked like they had just had a religious experience. Just like I looked the first time I saw Raiders, or Empire. Am I comparing this to those? No you idiots! all i'm saying is this: Think of the misguided love you have for the 86 flick and now look at it through a critic's eyes....it's total shit. Denying that is making you all look even more sad than you already do. Nothing is ever going to hit you the same way after you're an adult. it just never will. that's why everyone complains that the movies that came out when "we were kids" were so much better...it's because WE WERE KIDS!!!!! I will never understand why you pack of angry jackyls don't get that.

  • July 3, 2007, 7:45 a.m. CST

    tailhook

    by messi

    it's just you, although i kind of agree on the print thing, but not so much skank as snob but that's just her eyes, in the movie however she does a sincere performance where she seems sweet and geniune. the new Mary Jane. Fuck off Kirsten Dunst.

  • July 3, 2007, 8:08 a.m. CST

    Kick Ass movie

    by Philvis

    I was worried that the trailers were seeting me up for a disappointing movie, but luckily that wasn't the case. Transformers really pleased. Sure it wasn't an Oscar picture, but it entertained the hell out of me. This was a fun, blockbuster movie. My only complaint was the supernerds in the audience. They made some of the Star Wars super fans look normal at times. At least no one dressed up like a robot I guess. My wife and nephews loved it as well. I definitely can see myself going to watch this again. Great work Michael Bay. Oh, I still don't see why everyone was up in arms about flames.

  • July 3, 2007, 8:08 a.m. CST

    stoopidDclown

    by messi

    watch star wars again dumb cunt, you'd see it actually does have great acting and dialogue.

  • July 3, 2007, 8:24 a.m. CST

    GOOD FLICK!! But.....

    by Alexanderx

    There were some screwy things. 1.The tired Michael Bay dramatic camera sweep that always occurs after a dramatic battle or explosion. (BOOOOO!) 2.The pimping of products was a little much. 3.The "BLACK FACE AUTOBOT" JAZZ. The scene where they introduced him was sooooo corny. Hopefully they use the advanced technology used to create the special effects to edit that scene out. Along with every scene John Turturro was in. Other than that it was a fun flick.

  • July 3, 2007, 8:34 a.m. CST

    Messi

    by stoopidDclown

    No. no and again...No. it has classic dialogue. That doesn't make it good dialogue. Again, I'm not hating...I LOVE star wars. Saw it 27 times in the theater, back when they would re-release it every year. (before video) I love it. had every toy there was and knew...KNEW almost every line of dialogue. That doesn't make it good dialogue. Just classic. You should know the difference.

  • July 3, 2007, 8:52 a.m. CST

    Turturro was horrible

    by GrandMuffTarkin

    Mass had it right, JT phoned this one in. In that scene with Jon Voight where he's asking Turturro if he can contact the Air Force, you can almost see the thought bubble above John's head saying "I wonder how the weather is in Brooklyn?" Even for a Michael Bay movie, he was ridiculous. If I want over-the-top in an action flick, I want the Malkovich-Simon West-Con Air over the top, not this.

  • July 3, 2007, 9:13 a.m. CST

    stoopidDclown

    by spencey7

    So BayFormers does not contain shit dialogue, just "classic dialogue"? Re-read your post and you'll find it makes absolutely no sense whatsoever. Out of interest - Did you enjoy Episodes I-III? For Transformers fans what Bay has done is the equivalent of Lucas putting Zebra stripes on Darth Vader and having Obi-Wan Kenobi tell a fart joke. P.S. God forbid the BayFormers production team actually tried to make a movie to SATISFY THE FANS OF THE FRANCHISE, that would just be RIDICULOUS, wouldn't it??

  • July 3, 2007, 9:16 a.m. CST

    Bumblebee CAN'T LOOK LIKE HERBIE...

    by spencey7

    ...Yet Bay has him come across on screen as more like Herbie than Herbie is.

  • July 3, 2007, 9:56 a.m. CST

    What's Shia's Midichlorian Count In This Flick?

    by uss cygnus

    Meesa thinks is hugen bombad!

  • July 3, 2007, 9:58 a.m. CST

    My official apology to Michael Bay

    by TruPhan

    I doubted his skills as a filmmaker, but you know what? Despite myself, I had a great time watching it. I didn't laugh at every joke, and did notice some logical fallacies ("Let's hide the cube in the city and endanger all civilian life!") but I had such a good time (and wanted to see said city destroyed so badly) that I didn't really mind.<br><br>Transformers was originally a space opera? Huh. At the end of the movie it said it was based on toys.

  • July 3, 2007, 10:02 a.m. CST

    ILM did 95% of the FX - Digital Domain did a few shots

    by captain_sulu

    Dallas1701D, get your facts straight you retard.

  • July 3, 2007, 10:17 a.m. CST

    Oh yeah Im all sorts of powerful around here...HA.

    by LordEnigma

    Nah, just been around here a long time. Nevertheless, this movie is the movie that has made this Summer. So you either get out of the way or shut the fuck up. If you want to stay angry and scream "TINO", then go right ahead. Screaming something changes absolutely nothing. Dont you love stuff like that?

  • July 3, 2007, 11:34 a.m. CST

    For mature, deep and engrossing Transformers...

    by ScarranHalfBreed

    ...try the Simon Furman new Infiltration continuity. The movie looks like a good fun toy commercial, but nothing more.

  • July 3, 2007, 11:40 a.m. CST

    I haven't really had a good time...

    by SlickyVonBoner

    at a movie lately. Maybe that's why I'm so psyched to see this. I'm going to try to see this opening weekend with a big crowd. Should be blast.

  • July 3, 2007, 1:27 p.m. CST

    Gang Bang Grannies 6...

    by clone-o-mat

    Do I have to see the first 5 in order to understand it?

  • July 3, 2007, 1:31 p.m. CST

    Autobot American

    by Resevoir Doggystyle

    It's been proven again in Hollywood, the "black" guy/robot/whatever always dies first...even if he's a robot.

  • July 3, 2007, 2:09 p.m. CST

    Saw it last night...

    by kilerb

    First half was really enjoyable, then it turns into a big chase/battle that really only relies on special effects and characters you don't really care about. I was hoping for better things. Like I said the first half was REALLY good, but towards the 80% mark I just couldn't wait for it to be over. I never thought I would be saying this, but if you have to choose between this and Die Hard 4. SEE DIE HARD! I'd rather watch Die Hard 2 more times today, than see Transformers again.

  • July 3, 2007, 3:18 p.m. CST

    The rubix cube of life

    by nate26322000

    film owned. i went in with the lowest expectations, and was completely satisfied. Kinda sucked that i knew the spoiler because i went on a rattatouille talkback. ehhhh, w/e

  • July 3, 2007, 4:26 p.m. CST

    I sat in a full theater last night.

    by Briannicus

    Had ALOT of T-formers fanboys at the show. Due to the massive amount of applaus at the end of the movie, I would have to say it definitely delivered.

  • July 3, 2007, 4:40 p.m. CST

    Bay is worthless

    by globalkace

    Why does Bay make us sit through all that crap with the Autobots hiding around the house, the talk about masturbation, Turturro being a complete waste of space and time, only to have most of the fight scenes between the robots filmed 2 feet from the action so that we cannot see what the HELL is goin on!??! If you liked this movie, I understand. It's because every other movie "blockbuster" has completely sucked, and you're yearning to have something be good. I say, don't give in. Tell it like it is. Michael Bay is a worthless piece of crap that ruined this for everyone. I'm not a "fanboy," or a "hater." I'm just someone who wants to see a great or even good movie this summer, and so for I've been let down every time.

  • July 3, 2007, 8:21 p.m. CST

    Capone is a Douchebag

    by TheYellowBoy

    just like most of the other fanboys on here that just need to go out and get laid. This movie was great. I go to watch a movie to be entertained, not to pick it apart because you have this desire to feel "wanted" and "relevent". Watch a movie and see it for what it is...a high octane (excuse the pun) action movie about robots that whoop ass. The movie is called Transformers, not Character Development. Jesus...get off your fucking high-horse and enjoy yourself for once, you self-important prick.

  • July 3, 2007, 11:17 p.m. CST

    saw it tonite !!!

    by slkboxrman

    it was THE BEST MOVIE I HAVE EVER SEEN IN MY 36yrs of life...i said it in harrys review talkback too....this movie is the literal definition of "masterpiece".....the humor, the plot, the dialogue was awesome, even better than i expected and i was pumped for this movie last year.....the dialogue btween the autobots and decepticons was great and hit the "little kid" nerve that hasnt been hit since The Grinch that Stole Christmas (go ahead, laugh)..there was only one small laughable part, an "independence day" type goof, but it was passed over so fast u can forgive it, and soon will forget it given the immense amount of action..well worth the $9.50 ticket and will be worth it multiple times more......haters can hate but the movie was great!

  • July 3, 2007, 11:22 p.m. CST

    oh yea

    by slkboxrman

    for those that say it was all ACTION with NO STORY...again, what movie were u watching??....the action and story blended together seamlessly with the humor and the special effects, which should win an acadamy award. the quick cuts that bay is famous for are few and very far inbtween....overall an over the top action movie with a great story..... i basically knew the plot and what was going to happen and it still sent tingles up and down my spine

  • July 3, 2007, 11:30 p.m. CST

    "I GOT THA MONEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEY!"

    by Osmosis Jones

    I put the money in the jacket..an' the jacket on the kangaroo...an' he be hoppin' a-WA-HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!"

  • July 3, 2007, 11:35 p.m. CST

    All I want is for transformers to do well so we can...

    by Sulik2

    see Superman fight a giant robot in the next superman movie. Let the giant robot craze continue till 2009 please.

  • July 4, 2007, 12:24 a.m. CST

    I don't get how anyone can deem this movie good.

    by GibsonUSA Returns

    Everyone is entitled to their opinion, but I just don't get it.<BR><BR> I wasn't looking for a deep movie. I was looking for a fun popcorn movie. Live Free delivered. This didn't. 2.5 hours of stupid jokes, pee jokes, hiding around the house, GMC logos everywhere, and just total utter cheese. Yeah, like someone said "left cheek! left cheek!"....and what about the bored operator? <BR><BR> A few money scenes is not enough to save this mess. It's NOT non-stop action. The end had a lot of action, but the beginning and middle were just pure cheese.

  • July 4, 2007, 12:29 a.m. CST

    What's good about this movie?

    by GibsonUSA Returns

    The story? Nope. The designs? Nope. The character development? Nope.<BR><NR> The only thing you can praise this movie for is the highway fight and the finale. That's about it. The whole goofy parents thinking its an earthquake, the Autobots parked in the backyard, and basically all the humans stuff is basically total junk. Junk.

  • July 4, 2007, 4:58 a.m. CST

    Hey Capone, wanna buy some Amway?

    by GQtaste

    Shame on you sir. Or better yet, somebody call Penn and Teller cause that was some major Bullshit on your part!

  • July 4, 2007, 8:39 a.m. CST

    Again

    by globalkace

    It's like when you saw The Phantom Menace for the first time and could'nt face up to the fact that Lucas screwed it up. You wanted to believe. You wanted to feel like fans did in 77 leaving the theatre after seeing Star Wars for the first time. I know it's hard to believe that even Michael bay could screw up Transformers. But it has happened. It's okay. You can cry now. Let go.

  • July 4, 2007, 11:04 p.m. CST

    On the money

    by Bald Evil

    I saw the movie today, Capone's review pretty well covers my thoughts on it. I was perfectly happy to suspend nearly all disbelief and enjoy the movie, except for Megan Fox... I could never believe she (or her character) would settle for a nerd, no matter how many robots were involved.

  • July 5, 2007, 2:06 p.m. CST

    Worth the money

    by Alexanderx

    Let me start off by saying that I HATE MICHAEL BAY. His thick healthy head of hair, the camera swoop thing he does after a dramatic battle or explosion….HATE HIM. Somehow he managed to make a movie that I actually liked. The movie has many flaws: The whore’n of products, John Turtorro and the ebonics Autobot “JAZZ” and JOHN Turtorro. There are a lot of positives about the film. Mainly that it is entertaining. The special effects and sound were incredible! I sat up close because I arrived a little late. The Autobots and Decepticons look really, really nice. Not exactly the way I remember from my childhood but still damn good. Everyone is entitled to their opinions and like A**holes everyone has one. I really think that people need to cut this movie some slack. As far as the summer blockbuster season goes it is a good flick. Not perfect but good. Better than BOTH fantastic four films. Better than X3, SPIDERMAN 3 and Pirates 3. I am really surprised that the reaction to this film has been somewhat negative on this site. Actually now that I think about it, I am not surprised. Most of the people hate’n on this movie can’t be pleased.

  • July 5, 2007, 2:49 p.m. CST

    I loved Transformers!

    by uhitmeintheear

    It's like getting punched in the retina by a robot. And then your eye explodes. and you're like "thanks!" and then you go to work and wish you had your eye back.

  • July 5, 2007, 6:06 p.m. CST

    The Cloverfield trailer was far better

    by batzilla

    than the piece of shit Transformers. That movie sucked so bad. WTF?

  • July 6, 2007, 4:29 a.m. CST

    hmmm

    by slkboxrman

    well the movie is raking in the money, broke a tuesday record, set a new july 4th record.....on its way to breaking alot of records.... its a great movie, every friend of mine, including non transformer fans are saying its the best movie they ever saw...and i agree...all of u haters need to grow up and stop slamming the movie because its not a carbon copy of the cartoon...the story was even good, humor included, the parts that could have been cheesey were handled well within the movie so it worked...cant wait to see how bay tops this for the sequels

  • July 6, 2007, 8:32 a.m. CST

    a song for you...

    by longevitymonk

    (sings to the tune of the Transformers theme...) "Mi-chael Bay! Jacks off in your eyes!"

  • July 6, 2007, 10:30 a.m. CST

    The problem is...

    by globalkace

    This summer has been let-down after let-down. Of course Transformers is the best of the bunch so far. Doesn't anyone see though!!???! Standards for movies are severely diminishing! We watch crap like FF2, X-Men 3 and Spidey 3, and of COURSE we like TF better. I will not "give this movie a break" just becuase it was slightly less shitty than the other "blockbusters" this summer. Sound off like you got a pair and identify this movie for what it is. CRAP. Someone PLEASE make a movie worth seeing.

  • July 6, 2007, 12:20 p.m. CST

    I saw tfs yesterday, i cant

    by huggerorange

    I saw tfs yesterday, i cant say that i enjoyed it only because someone kept calling and caling my cell phone throughout the movie and i was beginnning to think it was an emergency. Everytime i would look down at the phone i would miss a key element to an action scene.finally i walked out of the theater to answer and sure enough, wasnt an emergency..what ever. Ill have to rewatch this. I saw this at a big theater during the day but for some reason the sound wasnt as loud as it shouldve been--do theaters turn the sound level down during daytime hours?. Everyones review commented on how badass the sound is and i didnt enjoy that either. Ill have to see this again for sure. From what i saw the transformers , like harrys review says, are lacking a lil more development. Loved Optimus, Megatron, and bumblebee though, the other TF's were badass too and deserved more screen time.I shouldve left the phone in the fucking car.

  • July 6, 2007, 12:37 p.m. CST

    I saw diehard 4 last week

    by huggerorange

    I saw diehard 4 last week and was really impressed at how good it was, i didnt see what everyone was saying about the jetfighter sequence being ridiculous over -the -top. The whole sequence had the right build up/tension and made sense. I was expecting something ridiculous like mclane surfing the jet, but what was so bad about this? I loved dhard w/ a vengeance and i think this one is just as good w/more action.

  • July 25, 2007, 9:08 a.m. CST

    IF YOU GONNA BULLSHIT US

    by Bunyon Snipe

    Please be consistent... Megatron can't change into a gun because he can't transform into some thing that doesn't have the same mass, yet the allspark does just that 100 feet tall one minute, being carried around by Shia Lebeuf the next, for fuck's sake make your mind up, Bay!