HERCULES Muscles His Way Back To The Big Screen!! It Is Written!!
Variety tells us that Millennium Films is prepping yet another iteration of HERCULES. This is, no doubt, sparred by the success of 300, and because there have been so few spins on the story in recent years (how many have there been, 73 trillion...there 'bouts?).
The project has already been scripted by Sean Hood. He wrote THE CROW: WICKED PRAYER and HALLOWEEN: RESURRECTION. No word yet on how they’ll approach this material, or who will direct.
300 stylization, perhaps? An angstier, angrier hero seeking redemption? A young, beautiful, misunderstood bad boy vying for the love of an excessively violable maiden chick – even though the dashing bad guy (the son of some king) already has her attention? Or, maybe the concept will be reinvented, and Hercules will find himself an uncharacteristically talented professional wrestler, who comes to learn that he’s actually the descendant of Gods & must defeat the local Ganstas (Wesley Snipes and Snoop Dog) in order to save the Hood. Lest a horrible misunderstanding occur, I’m just goofing around here…I don’t know what they’re up to.
All I know is that I smell another 2 hour long History Channel special airing the night before the film’s release, and that they’d better consider Coaxial’s Hercules for the title role before going any further. 'Cause, you know, a creature of might he is.
For my money, no one will ever equal the strange and troubling Lou Ferrigno HERCULES movie. Check out these clips. I can’t decide which moment rocks harder: the line of dudes being slowly smashed into the wall by Lou Ferrigno’s tree trunk (that doesn’t sound right, does it?), or Hercules applying the physics he must have learned in Sweaty Muscle Man Combat School to propel his chariot through the heavens. It’s all, very Mel Brooksian, isn't it?
Read the original Variety article HERE!!!
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May 31, 2007, 8:54 a.m. CST
by Mr. Nice Gaius
"That rock is too large. I could lift a smaller one."
May 31, 2007, 8:58 a.m. CST
"By-the-Gods," thet should make that.
May 31, 2007, 8:58 a.m. CST
Bring back Kevin Sorbo. It must be done.
May 31, 2007, 9 a.m. CST
May 31, 2007, 9:02 a.m. CST
by Franklin T Marmoset
I liked that part, Merrick. That was funny. Because when you've just said this is the guy who wrote Wicked Prayer and Resurrection, you really already know how they're going to approach the material.<p>They're going to approach it shitly.
May 31, 2007, 9:05 a.m. CST
Yeah, bring Sorbo back for one final fling at Hercules on the big screen. And bring that chick back ho played Aphrodite on the series....
May 31, 2007, 9:09 a.m. CST
by Nice Marmot
. . . they tell how Hercules went on to manage the Coaxial section at AICN. That would rock.
May 31, 2007, 9:11 a.m. CST
by THE KNIGHT
I hear they got some issues!
May 31, 2007, 9:14 a.m. CST
faux Harryhausen effects are awesome.
May 31, 2007, 9:19 a.m. CST
by Spandau Belly
Maybe get the guy who played Ryan to show Hercules as a fish out of water confrontationalist/ class warrior. Play a bunch of emo. Could be fun.
May 31, 2007, 9:21 a.m. CST
by Borgnine JR
..unless there's feisty midgets. If they do it up right. They should totally go the crappy Italian muscle-man route. For the new millenium.
May 31, 2007, 9:21 a.m. CST
You know, the one where the half-man, half-god grows up the biggest bully in Greece, kills his wife and kids in a temper tantrum, and then is somehow redeemed by performing a bunch of labors using his incredible strength? That will play well with the feminists.
May 31, 2007, 9:24 a.m. CST
by Boba Fat
this movie will flop! Flop I say!.....wait a second, why didn't he throw throw the bear in space straight away?
May 31, 2007, 9:29 a.m. CST
The Sorbo-series, the Young Hercules spin-off and the Disney version plus TV-series were not THAT long ago. Unlike Robin Hood. When was the Costner-movie? 1991? And Men in Tights was in 1994, so we really need a new Robin Hood!
May 31, 2007, 9:32 a.m. CST
by Crimson Dynamo
Virtue in his heart, Fire in every part, Of the Mighty Hercules.
May 31, 2007, 9:33 a.m. CST
Seriously, Hollywood don't you realise you'll be combining LOTR respected fantasy and Gladiator? That's a HUGE fucking cash cow waiting to be milked. How have you not figured this out yet?
May 31, 2007, 9:34 a.m. CST
or more like Clash of the Titans with CGI?
May 31, 2007, 9:36 a.m. CST
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DZ2paDoZ--g Cheesy and awesome at the same time!
May 31, 2007, 9:43 a.m. CST
If you're talking about Mark Marek's "Hercules Amongst the North Americans", by the gods that would be a funny movie. I think they did some cartoons on MTV years ago featuring him.
May 31, 2007, 9:55 a.m. CST
Don't we all need more Lucy Lawless in our lives? Kevin Sorbo can have a supporting role, but I need me some Warrior Princess.
May 31, 2007, 9:58 a.m. CST
I can't wait to see which rap star they cast as Herc's wisecrackin' sidekick. DMXicus. "Dat's what I'm talkin' bout. Step off, Hydra!"
May 31, 2007, 10:12 a.m. CST
by Angry Golfer
Hercules In NY was the best!
May 31, 2007, 10:19 a.m. CST
Round 2 to come when Die Hard 5 is released. That will be a G rated sequel.
May 31, 2007, 10:40 a.m. CST
by Ned Pepper
...the sign of quality motion pictures.
May 31, 2007, 11:13 a.m. CST
by Osmosis Jones
May 31, 2007, 11:18 a.m. CST
by Thomas Cromwell
Hercules is the Roman way of spelling it. Looking forward to seeing him clean out the dung from the stables and chopping off the Hydra's heads. Chip chop chip chop
May 31, 2007, 11:32 a.m. CST
Thanks for that video Merrick. I had never heard of that film and I now feel like I've seen enough. It is amazing what passed as eye popping in trailers back then. Hercules PUSHES DOWN A DOOR?! LOVE IT PUT IT IN!!!! And I really like how they wholesale stole the lightsaber sounds. Thanks again.
May 31, 2007, 11:51 a.m. CST
... and my hopes for the film went out the window.
May 31, 2007, 12:20 p.m. CST
Give us the SORBO! Better yet, give us a Xena movie too. I also love me some Warrior Princess!
May 31, 2007, 12:31 p.m. CST
I can't see anyone else in the Hercules role now...
May 31, 2007, 12:42 p.m. CST
Best b-movie tits next to Adrian Barbeau. <BR> <BR> As far as Sean Hood writing this, well that just lost me right there. Very shitty choice IMO. <BR> <BR> Now off to Amazon to see if that Lou version of Heracles is on DVD.
May 31, 2007, 12:50 p.m. CST
May 31, 2007, 12:52 p.m. CST
I really fucking hate that there is no goddamn edit button for us. Please Harry, fix that. Please. <BR> <BR> http://tinyurl.com/2ppyrz
May 31, 2007, 12:55 p.m. CST
Oedipus or Mourning Becomes Electra? Incest seems to be popular on the net. Pauly Shore as Hercules would be a hoot.
May 31, 2007, 1:06 p.m. CST
The Millennium Films logo is very familiar to me due to my viewing of the Seagal pictures. OUT FOR A KILL, MERCENARY FOR JUSTICE, BELLY OF THE BEAST (that last one probaly being the best movie they've ever made). So don't expect 300 here. They are trying to do theatrical releases now, but half the time they don't end up getting shelved forever and not making it to theaters (EDISON FORCE, PROZAC NATION), the other half they are notorious debacles (BLACK DAHLIA, WICKER MAN REMAKE). I guess the one exception was 16 BLOCKS which was completely mediocre despite Walter B's great performance.<p> Hopefully JOHN RAMBO will be their first big success. But no, I do not believe they will make a Hercules movie that makes it to the big screen or that anyone here watches. Chances are against it.<p> As for Herc playing Hercules, if he is too busy watching TV I think we got some other musclemen here. Demon Dave would be my first choice obviously (as an evil chaotic Hercules) followed by Juggfuckler and then third choice would be I think his name was Panterarocks who used to always talk about bodybuilding.
May 31, 2007, 1:07 p.m. CST
by Borgnine JR
Marshmallow Pits of Typhus IV! Hercules can be the doorman.
May 31, 2007, 1:15 p.m. CST
Demon Dave as Hercules in all his Demon Davness, inspired casting...but Juggfuckler would be an excellent choice as well
May 31, 2007, 1:16 p.m. CST
Yup Sybil Danning and rainbow prism effects....ahhhhhhh, good times, good times...
May 31, 2007, 1:26 p.m. CST
I do remember Sybil tough.
May 31, 2007, 1:42 p.m. CST
by Stalin vs Predator
The only logical followup to "Hercules in New York". The tagline could be "Ze vater eez a diet!"
May 31, 2007, 2:10 p.m. CST
Those old Steve Reeve's Hercules films were great. I wish they had a widesceen special edition DVD of them. Steve Reeves will always be my ideal version of Hercules.
May 31, 2007, 2:12 p.m. CST
by Spandau Belly
If it's willing to put money into a Wicker Man remake and DTV Segal movies, why wouldn't they give me 7 million dollars to make 'Hitter'?
May 31, 2007, 2:26 p.m. CST
May 31, 2007, 2:42 p.m. CST
by Automaton Overlord
that the guy who directed the first season of Xena got that job because of a sword and sandal movie he directed long before. its called "Death Stalker" its super over the top. Everyone should see that.
May 31, 2007, 2:49 p.m. CST
by Alonzo Mosely
Demon Dave is an inspired choice, he can write, act and direct... It could be his Citizen Kane... Fred Williamson for Zeus...
May 31, 2007, 2:51 p.m. CST
just make sure it has dedalus, and the horse boy, Newt. over here Herc, over here! nuf said.
May 31, 2007, 2:56 p.m. CST
May 31, 2007, 3:12 p.m. CST
With guest appearance by BRUCE CAMPBELL. You know you want it.
May 31, 2007, 3:30 p.m. CST
God of War! C'mon...anyone?
May 31, 2007, 4:10 p.m. CST
... was Bill Murray in "Il Returno de Hercules." <br><br> King Laetes: "So, Hercules, once again, we meet. By the gods! Look at you! You really have let yourself go!" <br><br> Hercules: "I have not exercised much since the last Olympics. And I've learned, to my sorrow, that if you stop exercising, the muscle turns to fat."
May 31, 2007, 5:23 p.m. CST
by David Lazarus Long
Have you seen the BBC series? Very tongue in cheek. Like the British bastard son of "Prince of Thieves" and "Men in Tights": Serious enough to be pretty badass, but laughs at itself enough to not be a snooze. <p> As for Herc, well... Nothing will ever replace the days of fighting my brother with swords made of K'Nex and duct tape while watching Kevin Sorbo and what's-his-face Iolaus kickin' some ass.
May 31, 2007, 5:26 p.m. CST
I throw my vote in for The Fuckler Of The Jugs. He has already demonstrated great bravery. I doubt Demon Dave could portray the redemptive aspect of Herc's arc, as he is all to aware of the corruptive forces concealed by the Doorway Of Pure Evil. And 5'll get you 10 Panterarocks is 5'2". I assume I was left out because you don't want me getting typecast...
May 31, 2007, 5:32 p.m. CST
no one has mentioned that Hercules/ Three stooges movie yet. Now that was all kinds of awsome, with a heaping side order of kick ass right there.
May 31, 2007, 5:44 p.m. CST
One of the best of the "Sandals and Swords" epics.
May 31, 2007, 5:55 p.m. CST
He even had a beard and carried the weight of the world on his shoulders(unlike Atlas) and buried Raimi's cartoony action version with Sorbo, which also begat XENA.
May 31, 2007, 7:44 p.m. CST
Hercules in the Haunted World directed by Mario Bava. It's got Christopher Lee, nerds.
May 31, 2007, 7:55 p.m. CST
by The Rondo Hatton Blues Explosion
Though all I really remember about it is my cousin's drunken musing: "You know, I love me some trim, but I'll be damned if I'd swim the ocean for it." Words to live by, brothers and sisters, words to live by.
May 31, 2007, 8:39 p.m. CST
THOU ART NOT THOR!!!!!!!!!!!!!
May 31, 2007, 9:40 p.m. CST
Hopefully she and her massive boobage will still be up to the task of this mighty remake.
June 1, 2007, 2:42 a.m. CST
I figured you were bored of that shit by now. Maybe you could make a cameo as Dr. Hercules, Hercules's uncle, he is kind of like Richard Roundtree's character in the Sam Jackson version of SHAFT.
June 1, 2007, 3:48 a.m. CST
by Hideo Kojima
he said he better be cast as Hercules because he's GOTTA EAT!
June 1, 2007, 4:07 a.m. CST
... if they get Michael Bay to direct and have ILM create a cgi Lou Ferrigno. I'd watch it.
June 1, 2007, 6:08 a.m. CST
"I'm gonna pop a cap in that muthafucka Zeus's ass!"
June 1, 2007, 11:46 a.m. CST
Kevin Sorbo's Hercules was one of the greatest tv shows ever.
June 1, 2007, 7:33 p.m. CST
a jefferson starship cameo, and it would have been just as sweet as the star wars holiday special
June 2, 2007, 11:50 p.m. CST
"Zeus! Yeah, Zeus! As in father of Apollo? Mt. Olympus? Don't fuck with me or I'll shove a lightning bolt up your ass? Zeus! You got a problem with that?!!"
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