Hey, everyone. ”Moriarty” here. Man, I don’t want to dislike this movie. But so far, I have yet to hear anything that would suggest this is a worthwhile retelling of a story that’s been made three times previously. So far, each of those tellings has managed to bring something new to the premise, but is this film one trip too many to the well? We’ll see. For now, we’ve got two reviews. Here’s our first one:
So, I thought I was fortunate enough to attend a screening of Invasion the other day and I could see that I was not alone as there was a good crowd on hand to see it as well. I figured, b/c of the size of the crowd, that there would be another "spy" to write in a review of this movie. I, myself, did not want to write in a lame review of an even lamer movie. And with Bruce Willis talking back on the site here, who in the hell wants to read about a boring as hell movie? Well, I believe it is in the best interest of you all out there to spread the word to avoid this film. I'll try to do my part. To my knowledge, this movie has been on the shelf for two years or so while it was being tweaked, re-shot, etc... In my opinion, they need to keep this movie on the shelf for another two years, or maybe even longer. Let Daniel Craig do a couple more Bond films before you decide to ruin his career. Or at the very least, show us the car accident Kidman had while re-shooting the finale chase sequence. (Does that make me sick?) There is absolutely no suspense, no thrills, no nothing for any movie goer looking for such. Why? For one, they never show the aliens or monsters or whatever that's supposed to be taking everybody over. No pods with tentacles or some other scary looking creature to be afraid of. Creative choice not to show it, you say? Clever idea to build suspense? If it was, it didn't work. In fact it bombed miserably. We just see some snot covered bodies that are "infected" and then those bodies wake up, peel dried snot off of them and are now "baddies." Come on, snot? Really? I'm supposed to be terrified of boogers? What is this, 2nd grade? All the movie is, is people staring into the camera. It's like it was a movie extra's dream come true. The number one rule of an extra is not to stare into the camera. But all you see in this movie is exactly that. Numerous extras staring into the camera. Apparently that's what the aliens do when they are scoping out potential non-aliens. I guess this is supposed to make them threatening. Sorry, I have had numerous staring contests in my life and I didn't pee my pants during any of them. Not one. And then the movie likes to throw those quick cut/edits at you, you know, the ones that trigger epilepsy in small children. Except, with these edits we see animation of blood cells being taken over by the infectious disease. And not just once, no no no. The audience might not have gotten it if it was shown only once. They show it countless times. I think the movie makers didn't have a long enough running time and they thought it was smart to show the disease taking people over. Then some jackass wearing a suit said, "Brilliant!! Put it in! That's gold baby!" Minor spoiler----------- The only semi-interesting part of this film is that the son is immune to the disease and therefore a threat to the aliens (or whatever the hell they are). That story piece alone sets this film apart from the other body snatcher movies. But this movie hardly deals with that aspect. The boy is staying with his infected father (Kidman's husband, they're separated) and the father tries to infect/change the boy. They do this, by the way, by spitting more snot into whatever people are drinking and that's how the disease is spread. Anyway, the boy doesn't change(immune) and the father is just like oh well, next! There's no build up payoff blah blah blah. Kidman does come to get him but you'd think that the aliens would have done something with him or to him and make it just a teeny bit harder for her to rescue him. (Moviemakers, are you listening?) The best part of the movie is the very ending where Kidman stares at her son lovingly/wonderingly and we're treated to a renditon/cover of John Lennon's "Imagine." This scene coming after the two run from the aliens and get rescued, fade to black. Then "Imagine" scene. No getting back at the aliens, no showing what the boy's immunity does to them. None of that... what do you call it? Oh, right PAYOFF. The whole audience burst out laughing at this moment as well they should have. This film was a monumental let down. Avoid at all costs. If you've read this far, I apologize for taking you away from the better aspects of this website. Oh, and Screening Exchange (the people who exhibited the screening)? Stop trying to ask everybody if they write online reviews (Alok I'm talking to you). Like it's some crime or something. Please, the studios love this site for the honest feedback they get. They should be solicitng our opinions more, not less. Alright, all done. Culan Dephi
Ummmm... ouch. If that wasn’t damning enough for you, check this one out:
I saw a review of the film up at Bloody-disgusting and figured you didn't get one, so here goes. This review contains spoilers. The Invasion is the 3rd remake of the original film (and all four are based at least in part on the Jack Finney novel). Up until now, each version of the film has had its own strengths, resulting in a rare 'trilogy' of well made films that are ostensibly the same. Does the 4th continue that tradition? No. More on that in a minute. Let's get the plot out of the way. Nicole Kidman plays Carol, a DC based psychiatrist. She is divorced, her ex (Jeremy Northam) works for the Center for Disease Control, and he is seeking joint custody of their son. Daniel Craig plays her best friend/would-be lover/apparent neighbor, Ben, who is a doctor. Early on, when trick or treating, her kid finds some sort of slime on his candy. Puzzled, she gives it to Ben for analysis. He and his colleague, Jeffrey Wright, determine it's alien. And then, the standard Body Snatchers plot more or less follows: people begin acting strange, our heroes do not know who to trust, etc. Throughout the film we are given two themes. One is how war-torn the world has become. We see news reports of warfare (mostly factual, i.e. Iraq, Darfur, etc) throughout the world. As the film goes on, the reports begin to change, and we hear, among other things, that the Shiites and Sunnis have reached a truce. In other words, the alien beings can bring peace. The other theme, one which isn't nearly as prevalent, is that of medicine being a quick fix to make you happy. Carol prescribes pills in order to make her patients feel content, just as the aliens are doing via their 'invasion'. How is Carol any different than the aliens? Now, reading that, you might be thinking, wow! This is a pretty interesting, or at least different, take on the Body Snatcher mythos. This movie might be pretty good! You would be completely wrong, however. The Invasion is possibly one of the worst major studio films in quite some time. All of those things I mentioned take up maybe 5-10 minutes of screen-time. And their impact is completely muddled by all of the contradictary actions of the aliens, especially near the end of the film. Suddenly, the peaceful and serene aliens are running around like "the infected", even making makeshift molotov cocktails at one point. We have a few car chases, a helicopter rescue, etc. It has been widely reported that the Wachowski brothers and V for Vendetta director James McTeigue were brought in to 'save' the film after Warner was disappointed with Oliver Hirschbiegel's original cut. We can only assume that is true since no one has denied it. The problem is, they are making an entirely different movie. Where Hirschbiegel's film was obviously more cerebral, the McTeigue version is an all out action movie. One or the other would have been fine, but instead they are combined into one ridiculous mess. Making matters worse (MUCH worse) is that someone behind the scenes decided that, in order to make the film even more "exciting", that they would edit in clips of scenes that have yet to take place in the middle of the scene currently taking place. For example, there is a scene where Kidman's husband is trying to get her 'on his side'. She is seemingly trapped in a house while he talks. Suddenly, we see her running outside, driving away, etc., in short bursts, before returning to the scene at hand. This continues almost throughout the entire film. Imagine if say, in Psycho, during the scene with Norman Bates talking to Marion in the parlor, Hitch began intercutting shots of the shower murder. Or maybe in Shawshank Redemption, showing Andy outside in the rain during one of his beatings. It's as ridiculous as it sounds. Maybe if they used it once or twice it MIGHT have been effective for a cheap jolt scare, but by my estimate they do it no less than in 30 scenes. The result? The film is never once suspenseful, because we have been told every single time what will happen. We know she escapes from her husband the second they cut to her running away, so going back to it is fruitless at best. Worse, this makes an already short film (95 minutes maybe) actually SHORTER if you think about it, because we see many scenes twice! The epilogue, always a tricky part in these type of films, goes in the most wrong direction a film could ever be. Rather than end on a downer, like most of the others have done, we get a "one year later" scene, where the aliens have been reverted back to their human self, and, I shit you not, a cover of "Imagine" plays on the soundtrack while someone points out that war in Iraq is as bad as ever. The guy in front of me burst out laughing as soon as the song began, and within 10 seconds most of the theater was joining him (one person NOT laughing was likely Joel Silver, who was in attendance). Way to make a bad movie worse. I can only pray that Warner comes to their senses and at least gives Hirchbeigel's original version some sort of release, a la Paul Schrader's Exorcist sequel. As it stands now, the only use this version has is a textbook example as to how badly studio interference can ruin a film. BC
