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Tons more SPIDEY 3 reviews crawl to us... some AMAZING, some not so much...

Ahoy, squirts! Quint here. Yes, I’m psyched for Spidey 3. And yes, that means I didn’t fully read any of these reviews in a selfish attempt to not ruin the whole film for me. I read enough to make sure they were legit, but other than that… I played it safe. I’m about a week away from seeing the flick… and I hope I radically disagree with some of these reviews, which are disappointed with it… even going so far as comparing it to X3 or even BATMAN & ROBIN. I don’t think there’s any possible way of it being that bad. But we’re also getting good word. There’ll be a mix below. So be warned of spoilers and start abusing that scroll button! Regular ZeMightyJedd kicks it off with a mega-positive review.

ZeMightyJedd here. I just saw Spider-man 3 at the Grove in Los Angeles. It was a press screening, and a good friend invited me at the last minute (she knows I'm a huge movie and comic fan). I have too many thoughts rushing through my head to write a standard review, so I thought I'd just post some thoughts as they come to me. I have thoroughly enjoyed reading AICN's special essays on the films of 1982, and sometimes I become melancholy and wonder if films now will ever be as joyous and electrifying as the movies of my youth. Well I am extremely happy to report that Spider-Man 3 is one of the most fun and exhilarating movies that I have ever seen. Recent films like 300 and Grindhouse have been great, but Spider-Man 3 is awe-inspiring. Not since Return of the King have a been so stoked with a movie. It's everything a superhero movie should be. This is definitely the strongest of the Spider-Man films, and that's saying a lot. Be warned though: it is not perfect, and there are some less-than-great parts to the movie. There is also a section of the movie that will totally divide audiences. More on that at the end of this review. However, the movie as a whole is wonderful. I will begin my review with the truly AMAZING stuff: FIGHT SCENES: This movie contained two of the best action sequences I've ever seen, ever. The first is Peter Parker's first fight with Harry Osbourne. This fight occurs about 5 minutes into the film, and it's just unbelievably great. The effects are really impressive, and the choreography of the fight is awesomely creative and well-structured. But mainly, the fight is BRUTAL. I really winced several times as both of these guys just beat the crap out of each other. The second awesome action sequence occurs a bit later when Spidey saves Gwen Stacy from a construction accident atop a skyscraper. Again, the effects and the sheer creativity of the sequence make it one of the most memorable action sequences of all time. The other sequences were outstanding as well. Peter's battles with the Sandman and his vicious second fight with Harry are totally awesome. However, the two I mentioned above aren't just great, they're iconic. ACTING: Tobey is better than ever—he totally carries the movie, and I pray that he returns for a 4th. Kirsten Dunst shows more depth than in any of the previous movies. Bryce Dallas Howard is sexy and sweet as can be—I had serious doubts when she was cast, but she really is the perfect Gwen Stacy. Thomas Hayden Church is haunting in his performance—his eyes show such sadness and desperation. And Topher Grace is great as Eddie Brock; he really sells Brock as a nice guy with a dark, desperate undercurrent. But there's one more actor to mention… JAMES FRANCO: Franco gives perhaps the strongest performance in the entire film. And that's really saying something, because all of the actors are spectacular. I've never been a huge fan of his, nor have I ever had anything against him—I guess he's just never stood out one way or the other to me. But in Spider-Man 3, Franco steals the show. The character of Harry Osbourne goes through so many emotional changes, and Franco delivers. He provides the biggest laughs of the movie, the biggest gasps, and the most tears. He's just incredible. I can't say enough. There is a scene in a coffee shop where Harry flashes an evil grin at Peter, and it sends chills down your spine. SANDMAN: The character of Flint Marko is really well-handled. He's both a frighteningly powerful villain and a sad, sympathetic man. While I don't want to give it away, I love how the end of his storyline is handled—it's very mature, and very different for a superhero movie. The special effects for Sandman are really cool throughout. I was especially thrilled by the scene where Flint first becomes the Sandman. As he transforms, his face just scatters away—it's a beautiful, haunting image. AUNT MAY'S RING: Honestly…Aunt May annoys me (more on that below). But the scene where she gives Peter her engagement ring so that he can offer it to Mary Jane is priceless. Peter hugs Aunt May, and as we see the tow of them embracing in May's kitchen, we really understand that she is a fragile old woman who truly loves Peter. It's hard to explain, but it's a really touching moment. STAN LEE: Stan Lee's cameo is great, and his line truly brought tears to my eyes: "One person really can make a difference. Nuff said." COMEDY: While being the most brutal and action-packed of all the Spider-Man films, this is also the funniest. Sam Raimi has a fantastic sense of humor, and he really knows how to get an audience to crack up. Examples: * Bruce Campbell gets a nice, fat scene, and he is HILARIOUS. Playing a snooty waiter at a French restaurant, Campbell just steals the show. Our audience of jaded press people were cheering at his every line. * Gwen Stacy's speech when she gives Spidey the key to the city: "I fell 62 floors and someone caught me." Soooooooooo funny. * In the same "key to the city" scene, when the little boy begs Spider-Man not to kiss Gwen Stacy. What an outstanding little moment. Of course a little boy doesn't want to see a superhero kissing a girl! Right on, kid! * J. Jonah Jameson's first scene with Betty Brant had the audience in stitches. On a side note, the actress playing Betty is the hottest chick in the movie. I wanted to see much more of her. * There's a great scene where Peter Parker is on the phone with Dr. Conners, but keeps ignoring him to flirtatiously order the landlord's daughter to bring him milk and cookies. Thought the scene exists to show how the symbiote is affecting Peter's personality, it's also extremely funny. Okay, now that I've listed all the amazing stuff, here's some of the just okay stuff. Not bad, but JUST OKAY: VENOM (SPOILERS): The way that the symbiote appears is kinda bland. Peter is in Central Park with Mary Jane and a meteor just happens to crash silently right next to them. The black goo crawls out of the meteor and hitches a ride on Peter's bike. It's not horrible or anything, but I wish Raimi had come up with a more intelligent, creative way to work the symbiote into the story. Also, effects-wise I wasn't thrilled with the full-on Venom face. I thought that Venom was much scarier and more powerful as a villain when we could see Eddie Brock's face sticking out from beneath the black costume. When the costume totally covers his face, it tends to look too cartoony. Just like all comic fans, I was dying to see Venom with his pointed tongue and fangs. However, in execution it was a bit of a letdown. That said, the death of Venom at the end is PERFECTLY EXECUTED, both in script and effects. THE FINAL FIGHT (SPOILERS): I have a lot of thoughts about the big final fight, which features Harry and Peter vs. Venom and Sandman. The GOOD: The teamwork in this scene is incredible. I know I might sound like a broken record, but the choreography and creativity of this sequence puts other superhero team movies to shame. Venom and Sandman really work together and collaborate to nail Spidey—they display way more intelligent teamwork than villains in the X-Men movies. And likewise, when Spidey teams up with Harry, they also display awesome teamwork. They are not just two super-powered dudes fighting in the same vicinity-- they are teammates, working together and taking advantage of their combined strengths to battle their foes. "Team" movie franchises like X-Men and Fantastic Four should really take their cues from the end of Spider-Man 3—this is exactly how action sequences with multiple heroes and villains should play out. The NOT-SO-GOOD: My one big complaint is that the fight takes place in an unexciting construction zone. Why didn't Raimi choose to stage this scene in a more iconic New York landmark, like Times Square or Madison Square Garden or Yankee Stadium or Rockefeller Center??? Also, though it makes total sense to the plot, I was a bit annoyed that once again, a Spider-Man movie climaxes with peter having to save Mary Jane from a villain. Been there, done that. Also, for some reason Raimi kept cutting away to several distracting side scenes, such as a little girl talking to J. Jonah Jameson, or a reporter filing a live news report. The scene would have been much, much stronger if Raimi had stayed with the action and not continually broken the intensity by focusing on throwaway moments. AUNT MAY: Is it me, or is Aunt May really annoying? She just is not a believable human being. All she does is enter the film at key moments and offer sage-like wisdom, without any sense of humanity or humor. Not horrible, but kinda lame. With the exception of the engagement ring scene I mentioned above, Aunt May really didn't add much to the rest of the movie. Now, the most DIVISIVE part of the movie: Raimi's depiction of the symbiote's effects on Peter. DARK PETER: Similar to the very brief "Raindrops Keep Falling On My Head" sequence form Spider-Man 2, Raimi takes a very humorous and musical approach to Peter's dark transformation. We see Peter literally strutting down the streets of Manhattan, lecherously hitting on women and shaking his stuff Travolta-style. This section of the movie climaxes with a flat-out ridiculous scene where Peter does a dance number at a restaurant where Mary Jane is working. That's right, a DANCE NUMBER. This scene is totally out of left field—it's absurd, preposterous, and totally over-the-top. And you know what… I LOVED IT! I FUCKING LOVED IT! Peter Parker using his superpowers to strut his stuff on the dance floor. In a strange way, I feel that this was the most brilliant way to show Peter's total decent into conceit, aggression and selfishness. That said, I totally understand that some people will HATE this section of the film. They will feel that Raimi has gone too far and is turning the film into a joke. While I don't agree with this viewpoint, I do understand it and I can't really argue it. As I've made clear, these scenes worked for me, but they are extremely risky. FINAL THOUGHTS: You are an absolute idiot if you don't see this movie in the theaters. I mean that—you are an idiot if you don't see this on a big screen. Spider-Man 3 is outstanding, and it provides some of the best film moments that I have ever witnessed. This is an "event film" in the most positive sense of that phrase. Raimi has given it all to us: Laughs, Tears, Gasps, Action, Horror, Suspense, Romance, Chills. And yes, superhero dancing. I don't know how he does it, but Raimi has once again managed to bring a comicbook to the screen. There is a brief shot where Spidey swings in front of an American flag, and it is a perfect little moment. In my opinion Spider-Man is the American hero, more so than Superman or Batman or Captain America. Raimi has truly crafted a movie that earns the image of Spidey in front of that flag. Bravo!

Ze follow up to ZeMightyJedd… not quite as enthusiastic… Here’s “Spiderslayer!”

And it tears my heart out to report that it blows. Not quite Batman & Robin-blows, but something akin to X Men 3-blows. I managed to get a ticket to the premiere here in Dublin last night and as you might imagine, I was stoked. Now, before I start, let me just clarify, I love parts 1 and 2 and I love Sam Raimi's work. He's as creative a director as there is working in the business today and has been for 20 years, and I guess that's what tears me up about the mess that is Spiderman 3. I'll keep this as spoiler free as I can, as I believe in letting people make up their own minds... Where to start? Ok, let's start with the good... As you might expect, JK Simmons and Bruce Campbell are top notch. Simmons continues to channel the spirit of J Jonah Jameson to a tee and Bruce, in a more fleshed out cameo than 1 and 2, has a lot of fun as a Clouseau-esque Maitre' D. Also, the CGI for the symbiote suit and subsequently Venom was also well done without being overly flashy, and this was a concern of mine going in, that it might be about the effects rather than the story. Unfortunately, as far as good things go, that's it. As for the bad, I don't know where to start. Right from the get go, something didn't feel right (I'm not fanboy enough to say it was Spider-sense!). The opening credits were embellished with scenes from 1 and 2, not comic book art as used to good effect in 2, but actual clips. This felt a little hackneyed and un-necessary. The opening scene where Peter goes to see MJ perform on Broadway was the real clincher. Here we have Kirsten Dunst on stage, miming to the worst dubbed-over singing I've seen outside of Bollywood. It was painfully obvious it wasn't her and made even more so by a scene later in the movie where she sings in a jazz club and it's obviously her... and the girl can sing! That was the real clincher for me that things were going wrong and so it came to pass. I could go on all day about everything that was gut-wrenchingly bad about the movie but I'll try and condense it as best I can. First, Spidey/Peter Parker. As normal Spidey/Parker, Tobey Maguire does his usual solid job as the geek with powers. It's when he becomes Black Spidey that things go wrong. He's just not bad-ass enough. I don't know whose idea it was, but the way they convey that he's no longer nice, dorky Parker but is instead Peter Parker, neighbourhood thug is to comb his hair differently and have him wear eyeliner, like some reject from Panic At The Disco. This leads to two of the most cringeworthy scenes in the movie, one a Saturday Night Fever pastiche and the other a dance scene! (I know, I know, you want to read that again, but trust me, they both happened!). There's no in-depth insight into the struggle between the real Parker and the suit, as there was in the comics. When he does come to the realisation of what's happening to him, it's almost a throwaway moment to create an easy transition to Venom. Which brings me nicely to the baddies. Firstly, Venom/Eddie Brock... sorry to disappoint, but Venom is in this move for all of 20 minutes, 20 minutes of a 2 and a half hour movie. Whilst the look is impressive, all you are getting is Eric Forman on speed, whereas the pre-venom Brock is just Eric Forman. I'm sure Topher Grace has more strings to his bow than reliving his TV past, but I've yet to see him do anything else, and this movie is no different. In my opinion, the whole Venom origin storyline is one of the strongest in the comic's long and illustrious, but for the most prevalent baddie in the Spidey mythos over recent years to be reduced to little more than a fanboy-pleasing cameo is frankly sinful. With Sandman, the problem is different. He's in it plenty and Thomas Haden-Church is solid in the role. The problem is the role itself. No longer is Flint Marko a petty hood who goes on an ego-trip when he gets his powers. Instead, he's a victim of circumstance, an everyman who's been downtrodden by God and justifies his actions with the most hackneyed plot device, the sick daughter. Even the revelation that he had killed Ben Parker but it "wasn't my fault" felt shoe-horned in as a means of excusing his actions. Finally, we have Harry Osborn/Green Goblin 2. Let me get this off my chest, I don't like James Franco. His acting involves either looking tortured or shit-eating grin, that's it, that's his range and he's not called upon to change that here. He's still got daddy issues to take out on his best friend, but he's nowhere near manic or vengeful enough to be believable and then as if the word "hackneyed" hadn't been used enough in the preceding paragraphs, the film-makers throw in another cliche... he get's amnesia from a bump on the head and forgets that Spiderman "killed" his dad! This occurs early on in the film, and i was already close to tearing out my own hair and that of everyone else around me! I won't go into the romantic sub-plot as let's be fair, very few people care! It's a bit of a rehash of the one from part 2, only this time with Peter being the overachiever. Yes, Gwen Stacey appears, but she's barely more than a stock damsel-in-distress or, in the case of Bad Peter, a tool to make MJ jealous. Also, when the romance element rears its head, it's the cue for Aunt Mae to pop up, give Peter a little homespun wisdom and disappear again. It takes up WAY too much time in the middle act which could better have been used to flesh out Venom, or make more of the Parker-Symbiote conflict, but it doesn't and that's more sad than irritating. Overall, as a movie, it's too busy. 3 enemies mean too many cooks spoil an already-nicely simmering broth. We saw it with Batman Forever and Batman & Robin and we're seeing it here. There's very little of the human drama of the first two movies, rather there's a lot of melodrama, and we all know they're not the same thing. Also, to relegate two major characters from the Spidey universe, Gwen Stacey and Venom, to little more than scene-filling cameos, is nothing short of criminal. The finale is what had me closest to tears. Whilst the action was fine (and I should point out that throughout the movie, the action scenes were still rather good), the characterisation was apalling. As I said, I'm not one for spoilers, but giving Spidey a sidekick? C'mon, man, what the hell?!... and the dialogue was something George Lucas would have cringed at! I'm sure it will still rake in millions upon millions of dollars, as the first two would ensure a lot of return business, but Spiderman 3 smacks of a franchise that's run its course, at least for now, and needs to be put in suspending animation for a while a la Batman to allow for fresh eyes and fresh minds to try again some time down the road. What they need to do is make sure they don't decide to put a fourth installment in the hands of a lesser mortal than Raimi *cough*Ratner*cough* because it would truly destroy all the goodwill built up by the work that had gone before. It's time to let the Spidey franchise retain as much dignity as possible and let it rest... for now**************************

And the pendulum swings back to a positive look from Germany!

Hi Harry! Here's my review for the just seen SPIDER-MAN 3. This is the link to review on my page: http://www.greekgeek.de/spider3review_en.html And here's the review: I just saw SPIDER-MAN 3 at a press screening here in Hamburg, Germany! The theatre was packed! I will try to stay away from any spoiler, but I have to say that you see most of the bad guy stuff in the trailers. The other interesting stuff, the parts that work the best in the SPIDER-MAN movies are surprising and not in any trailers!!! First off: it's a great movie! They managed to squeeze all the three bad guys storyline into 140 minutes without making the movie too crowded. This has to be the blueprint for any SuperHero movie from now on!!! SPIDER-MAN 2 is for me THE best Superhero Movie off all time! Now this one, SPIDER-MAN 3, manages to get with one screening right behind the second one (on my list). I wonder what will happen when I see it again. I always thought that the first one was a real good movie but not that great. I became a SPIDER-MAN Movie fan since the second one! Sam Raimi shot a great conclusion of the "first" SPIDER-MAN trilogy. It ends all the storylines that runned through the first two movies. Directing is as always great, the screenplay is like the second one (who thought than Alvin Seargent is so good!!) and the actors are even more comfortable in their parts than ever before. SPIDER-MAN 3 is action-packed! There are many big set pieces: the loose crane, the bank robbery chase sequence, the showdown. But between those amazing action scenes is everything that makes SPIDER-MAN 3 so great. The M.J.-Peter Storyline with all their problems and misunderstandings is more lively than in the last ones. And then, after the midpoint, it gets even more interesting. Gwen Stacy, Eddie Brock and Harry Osborne cross their personal lives. The "Revenge Storyline" with Sandman is the shortest one and runs through the whole picture. Every beat and every twist propels something else in the story... and it delivers! Tobey Maguire is again great as Peter Parker, especially with an edge after the symbiont takes possesion. Kirsten Dunst plays this time the part of the sad partner in an relationship and afterwards she's (again) the damsel in distress. James Franco as Harry Osbourne is this time slightly better. I thought that he was always the weakest actor in this great series! Sandman and Venom work great but they are not the main players in this story. They are part of the big picture, as is the "New Goblin", but the main story is the not-so-great relationship between M.J. and Peter. When he ask her "go get them tiger?", to get her approval, when he's ready to chase the bad guys, she's rolling with her eyes and isn't anymore the girl at the end of the second movie. She is the opposite of Peter: she has no sucess with her acting job and her lovelive isn't exactly good! Peter is happy with himself. He has a crush on Gwen Stacy (Bryce is very cute - please stay away from M.Night) and the whole city loves him!!! And then he gets the black suit and every thing get out of control! JJ.Jameson is just great (I would even watch a spin-off just with J.K. Simmons screaming around) The part with his heart condition alarm is perfect! Even Stan Lee has another cameo - this one his best: (to Peter) "I guess one person can make a difference". And of course the "Bruce Campell Scene", this time as an french waiter in a funny but sad (for the Parker/Watson couple) scene. Now the only thing I didn't realy understand is why Raimi changed Danny Elfman with Christopher Young??? They said that they split up because Raimi used a music cue from Young for SPIDER-MAN 2 (I think for the train scene) and Elfman said "here's the Main Theme. You can have it. I'm gone". So, in this one we have "The Elfman Main Theme" all the love Theme cues from Elfman (especially the sad moments from the second one) and just a new "black suit theme" from Young?!!? Everything else (mostly the "main theme" in all of it's glory) sounds like Elfman! So this one ends the story, but it doesn't have the feeling of an closing end. Please Tobey, just make another one (or two!!!) I can't tell you anything about the showdown because I can't tell you who fights whom and with whom!!! If anyone wants to hear spoilers, please go to the Forum of my Website, (to the SPIDER-MAN group: http://www.greekgeek.de/forum/index.php?board=28.0) start a Spoiler Thread and I will tell you anything that you want to know about SPIDER-MAN 3 This is a start of a big summer and SPIDER-MAN 3 is the biggest start ever! Please excuse my english! And if you print this, call me GreekGeek!!

Here’s another positve, from a long time reader, first time writer!

Hello all of you, First review for the web-don't know how to begin- Will they be happy to hear how I found a way to see SPIDERMAN 3 in advance ? How hard it was to find a good parking space not to far from the theater ? Did I put my Spidey outfitt on to see it ? What was the color of the seat inside the theater, did it match my mood as I sat in it ? No one gives a fuck of course What you people want to know is an honest point of view on Spider-man the Third. Here is mine You won't read any spoilers, cause I have already enough hatred for myself, I do not need yours. Let me break it down for you... Overall Spider man 3, is a huge gift, a huge thousand dollar bill you find in a small pocket of a jacket you didn't wear since college times. There's so many stuff in this movie that has never be done and seen before...It is a like you cool people say in the U.S. : an eye fucker!! I am French, please excuse all the misspelling from before, and the ones that follows. An eye fucker…But... not a heart fucker. Cause I have to say, the movie suffers from a real "But", The "but" you didn't want to be there, the "but" you don't want to see or feel, the « but » you try to erase when you leave the theater, the "But" you don't mention to your friends when you call them over the phone so you won't spoil their pleasure when they'll see it. A real " but" guys too massive too thick to look away, and act like it's nothing. Where is the fucking rythm ? Where is the pace man ? How come after the first hour, I felt like I was in there for two ? How come it felt like watching the godfather part 2 ? I am not kidding, It is so fucking long !The movie feels like 3 hours long ! It moves slow! To be honest it’s not that slow, I have a exagerate a little but that’s a real issue in this one. Now that was the first feelings, allow me now to review all the aspects in details... There is action, you stop breathing, you see spiderman swinging in the air, you think : did he really do tha...Yeah man, he just did. You see Sandman you go : Man ! how big is this thing ?! it is bigger than king kong. You see Venom, and you are really fucking scared, I mean « predator without the mask » scared. You see MJ…well you know… You implore your own eyes to not miss a thing! Please guys do not let me down ! Please brain remember, reccord everything (cause if I pull out a camcorder, even a cell, the sniper from the balcony will shoot me in the head Schindler's list's style). You hear yourself saying "you’re so cool !!" between two fat strangers, sorry did I say that ? No I’m not gay ! Spiderman 3 does to spiderman 2 what Spiderman 2 did to the first one, it makes old it look old, really old. It burries it deep into the ground like a bone you're ashamed to have loved some much. Those guys made a giant visual leap. The imagery, the photography is so touching, look at the sky, look at the buildings, the Streets, this the New York that I imagined when I was thirteen, in my bed in Paris ! This is the light that builds the bridge between reality and comic book esthetics : Full of life, hope and naivete, the mood of Spiderman. the universe of the film is as good as the second one. Even a basic froggy like myself loved seeing Spiderman passing in front of the american flag, this so so cheesy and classy at the same time 5you guys have the classiest flag ever, go look at the Mozambiq's). Actually this is excactly why this series works so well, it balances perfectly between classyness (can you say this word ?) and cheesyness. The music, is pretty much the same, the theme for black spidey works all right. But for me the score has never been great, this is so average compare to Superman. I guess we'll have to wait for the fourth one, a new series to hope for something that drives you crazy. Now I want to talk about what really matters to me. THE STORY. Is it good ?... It’s a complex question to answer… So I’ll say the story’s good, yeah, but it’s not well told. Don’t worry at this excact moment, I feel myself drowning under the tons of treasures of hate you just produced to crush my brain because of what I just said. But still, let me get a chance to explain… I mean first the story is good, yep it’s true, I liked what it’s about, revenge-selfishness-friendship-forgiveness-. All the themes are there, Every part is interesting Green Goblin’s, Venom’s, even the sandman one, which is pretty thin, I Liked. It is what it’s telling. For plot that simple, you dindn't need scenes that long, sometimes you feel like you are trapped inside a horse track and running around without stopping you go : haven't we been here before. I like my spiderman as a looser, a guy that suffers from the cruelty from the others, a man secretly in love, a guy I can identify with, a man with a good heart that only one girl sees..etc.. In this movie Peter has everything, it is about a guy who has it all, he is almost Tony Montana, He has nothing to overcome exept is own ego. I am not saying it is a bad angle, the black suit is a great subject anyway. It is just a theme harder to connect to Peter Parker. What I loved about spiderman, it it’s fragility, not it’s strenght. Besides that, You have everything, all the plots treated in previous episodes are solved… but that's the minimum you could ask for. The love story is weaker, less problems, leads to less drama, leads to less tension, leads to less interest, who wants to see Peter dating MJ ? We want to see him fight to get her love. Otherwise it is a little bit « petit bourgeois ». Remember Rocky 2, I mean common Adrian is in a coma, that's real drama, nothing really bad happen to MJ. Now for the rest : there’s the way the story is told and this is the reel problem I have with this movie…It is not bouncing, no plot makes move another plot forward . They mixed everything, but there is no real threading. You do not get that interesting sitcom feeling in the structure you had on the first and on the second one. There’s no surprises, no twists, everything you forsee in the back of your head happens on the screen. You don’t have emotional cliffs, I mean don’t get me wrong, it is pleasant, smart, funny, it’s just less powerfull. You remember in Spiderman 2, the scene when Spidey’s body is carried by the new yorkers who swear they’ll keep his secret. That was fucking powerfull !!!That’s what happens to a superhero-super emotions. In this one you won’t get it. A lot of weeping, a lot of good acting, but that is all. And you know what, maybe that’s enough. Now for me what makes a really great movie is the details, some particular scenes..a dialogue here..etc.. some precise souvenirs you can cherish and you can evoke to a friend when you want to save a terrible dinner. the movie is loaded with it. Remember the Bruce Campbell cameo, the story about the island told by Aunt May, Harry’s butler on the top of the stairs, Peter and the sand in his boots, Peter walking in the streets..etc.. those were some of my moments.. now go find yours. I hope all of you love this movie, because even if it’s not perfect, it is a great feeling to love spiderman. Call me « Le Mec le plus frais de Paris »

That was a… unique review. Lots of negatives, but still calls it a thousand dollar bill found in an old jacket pocket. Interesting. Here’s our last review of the batch. If we get a flood of them through the day, I’ll throw a few more of them here. This one’s more mixed/negative.

Hi Harry / Moriarty I managed to see Spiderman 3 at London screening (Odeon Leicester Square) yesterday I thought I'd share my review with you guys.... I'm not quite as enthusiastic as some.... Its a sad fact that no trilogy is ever perfect, The Indy Trilogy had Temple of doom, the original Star Wars had Return of the Jedi, Lord of the rings had The Two Towers, Back to the future had part 3. Could it be that the Spiderman be the first consistent trilogy the SF & Fantasy genre has yearned for? The short answer is simply no. The story starts off well, with Peter Parker riding high on his success at the daily planet, his relationship with Mary Jane (which he intends to formalise by popping the question) and Spidey's popularity, Harry Osborne is still plotting his revenge for his fathers death. The film continues strongly as Flint Marco (played with a gruff attitude by Tomas Hayden Church) is introduced as a good man driven to do bad things to help his ailing daughter and soon enough through a now typical science goes mad experiment that seem to populate the Spiderman universe he is transformed in to Sandman. Where the film flounders and where the biggest criticism lies with the inclusion of the black suit and subsequently Venom. Where Spiderman and its sequel had a deft touch and a nice balancing act of emotional resonance in between the CGI wham bam action, the alien symbiote in Spiderman 3, which feeds off strong emotions, simply muddies the waters between Peter and MJ by driving Parker away with his pride before a fall arrogance , which in turn extends the relationship side of the movie past a natural conclusion. Once the symbiote jumps from Parker to disgraced rival photographer, Eddie Brock (Topher Grace, in cocky smart arse mode) the movie gains an extra villain it didn't need and that adds more padding to a story that's already taking its sweet time getting anywhere. Its a big inditement of the Venom character that you come away feeling that had it not been included at all, the film would have been a pacier and a tighter one, its clear as day that Rami has no love for the character, but was somehow forced to include him.... As a result what you end up with is Sandman getting sidelined and his storyline left hanging in an unsatisfying way, this in turn ends up with a movie that should have wrapped up the lose ends not having enough time to do so, no mean feat for a two and a half hour film. On the plus side the acting is pretty consistent with the previous movies, although Tomas Hayden Church is wasted as Sandman, without enough real screen time (not as a CGI roaring monster) any emotional pathos you should have for the character is lost. The CGI is as good as you would expect for a movie of this calibre, and some of the fight sequences are vomit inducing rides where you're at times left confused as to exactly which way is up! In the end fans of the previous two will find a lot to like about Spiderman 3, the humour, Rami's frenetic camera work and elaborate set pieces are present and correct, but in the end its over long running time and lost focus where the villains are concerned, combined with a feeling of forcing the story beyond its natural end leave you cold and yearning for a more restrained film. If you use this review call me Lightwave7871


Readers Talkback
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  • April 19, 2007, 5:39 a.m. CST

    itll be good

    by Campfiresongs

    it will

  • April 19, 2007, 5:43 a.m. CST

    Aw man, I so wanna see it! NOW!

    by DerLanghaarige

    NOWNOWNOWNOWNOWNOWNOWNOW! Not in a few weeks, NOW!

  • April 19, 2007, 5:48 a.m. CST

    Daily Planet - Bugle

    by Lightwave7871

    Anchorite.... yeah busted! I wrote that and sent it off and had that "Oh shit" moment when I realised my mistake.... I hang my head in shame at the faux pas.... ;) Next week I'll be watching the Hulk movie thats set in Gotham ;)

  • April 19, 2007, 5:52 a.m. CST

    its almost....

    by Lightwave7871

    like phantom menace in so far as it manages to look great in the trailers and push the geek buttons on paper, but in the end the film loses direction and feels over indulgent and bloated compared to the others....

  • April 19, 2007, 5:53 a.m. CST

    "Lord of the rings had The Two Towers"

    by Primus

    Er... Two Towers was just as good as Fellowship, if not better. Certainly can't trust this guy's opinion. Let's hope Spidey 3 is in the same league as Two Towers!

  • April 19, 2007, 5:54 a.m. CST

    And BTTF3 was way better than part 2

    by Primus

    Certainly more fun.

  • April 19, 2007, 5:54 a.m. CST

    I saw it too

    by Fuck The Napkin

    Agree that Venom feels kind unsatisfyingly tacked-on. The black suit stuff works well with the whole "revenge" theme but Venom's just popped in too quickly and half-assedly, almost just to keep Talkbackers happy. Would have been nice to have saved him for a fourth film and really gone to town with him. Bruce Campbell was great, I really liked the fact there was more cartoony humour this time (the dance scene's fine with me), but really it's still another mediocre love story with lots of CG characters falling off buildings and smashing into things.

  • April 19, 2007, 5:55 a.m. CST

    Sequel Overcompensation = Too Many Bad Guys

    by Mullah Omar

    An alarming number of screenwriters seem to believe that after a few films in a series, one bad guy is no longer dramatic enough. That's too bad, because my favorite bad guys are the ones with about as much screen time and character development as the hero.

  • April 19, 2007, 5:59 a.m. CST

    Primus - sequel opinions

    by Lightwave7871

    If you liked Two Towers and BTTF 3 thats cool, but I was more illustrating that while good in their own way they're not as good as the others in the series... It wasn't damning either film, purely expressing an opinion that no trilogy has been consistantly great...

  • April 19, 2007, 6:01 a.m. CST

    ZeMightyJedd, you're a plant...

    by redtom

    ...so get the fuck out now before I grab my weed-killer...

  • April 19, 2007, 6:03 a.m. CST

    two towers was weak

    by lionbiu

    the story was choppy and the acting was non-existant...definetely the weakest link in the LOTR Trilogy. I hope this movie is good...and most signs are pointing to yes.

  • April 19, 2007, 6:03 a.m. CST

    Ok

    by NudeandAroused

    Still going to see the movie. Didn't think that 2 would be good. It turned out to be a classic. Hopefully 43 will be as good.

  • April 19, 2007, 6:06 a.m. CST

    and GreekGeek?

    by redtom

    ... so are you - that's it, where's my weed-killer...

  • April 19, 2007, 6:12 a.m. CST

    my spidey sense is tingling...

    by just pillow talk

    in high anticipation of this movie. I sure I will enjoy this one just as much (if not more) than the first two. And RighteousBrother, there is no way X3 is in the same ballpark of shit like Batman & Robin.

  • April 19, 2007, 6:16 a.m. CST

    Who cares

    by Stollentroll

    I can't believe all the love for the spidey movies. Why would anyone care for this pretentious crap? They may even work as children movies...but definitely not for me. When the first reviewer talks about how Aunt May doesn't feel like a real person - that's how everything in parts 1 and 2 just DOESN'T FEEL REAL. Am I the only one to recognize how bad the acting in those movies is? And the art direction? And the CGI?

  • April 19, 2007, 6:16 a.m. CST

    "Lord of the rings had The Two Towers"

    by NachoNegro

    Primus if you think TTT was better than Fellowship you are clearly profoundly retarded, to the point of being completely dependent on your carers for any and all aspects of daily life. TTT had it's moments (Helm's Deep), but it was by far the weakest of the 3 films. Fellowship was the most coherent film of the trilogy.

  • April 19, 2007, 6:24 a.m. CST

    Is this real?

    by Spartacus Hughs

    http://tinyurl.com/2zwh6y

  • April 19, 2007, 6:32 a.m. CST

    am I the only one

    by Kloipy

    who hated Treebeard? Because I thought the work on the Ents was pretty bad. I'm sure it's diffucult to make them, i just was unimpressed

  • April 19, 2007, 6:35 a.m. CST

    batman begins

    by hesky75

    Now thats a film that holds up on a second viewing and on the 3rd and 4th ....... Spiderman1 doesnt at all ! spidey 2 does but I hope venom isnt tagged on and I certainly hope this isnt no X3.......

  • April 19, 2007, 6:36 a.m. CST

    batman should have stopped after the first one

    by Kloipy

    I think they need to make The Maxx into a movie. Something really different.

  • April 19, 2007, 6:43 a.m. CST

    Two Towers was weak???

    by Primus

    Two Towers was masterfully directed and edited. It had the hardest job to do of the three films, having to carry all the sub-plots without much resolution, but it did it fantastically. I thought ROTK was the weakest actually. Fellowship was also awesome of course, and certainly easier to follow, for the obvious reason that its narrative was much more linear than either sequel. Two Towers was darker, richer and grittier than the Fellowship, and it was thrilling for it. Can't believe there isn't much love for Two Towers!

  • April 19, 2007, 6:43 a.m. CST

    kloipy

    by hesky75

    batman begins is awsome it has the whole training bit, just like the original part of highlander both sean connery and liam neeson have the gravitas as a mentor ......Not the qui gon shit ! and the uncle ben but never carried that much weight

  • April 19, 2007, 6:44 a.m. CST

    Hit and miss

    by Affleckwasthebomb

    I had 2 friends go see it last night, if I wasn't working I would of gone. I hate resposibilty, why can't I just be able to drop everything and see a movie. Any way they both thought it was hit and miss but one was more please than the other. Apparently not weel written with some dodgy CGI but it also kinda gives you what you want. I can't wait to check it out myself though.

  • April 19, 2007, 6:45 a.m. CST

    Bullshit!

    by Dazzler69

    that S-M3 is not in America playing b4 these forign markets!

  • April 19, 2007, 6:46 a.m. CST

    Primus, I agree

    by Kloipy

    TT was much better than Return. And Hesky, i agree that Begins is def. the best one since the first batman, but it just happened to bore me. I used to love batman as a kid, but now, it's just lost all interest for me.

  • April 19, 2007, 6:47 a.m. CST

    Nobody has mentioned the Mysterio cameo.

    by Spartacus Hughs

    I thought there were four villains.

  • April 19, 2007, 6:49 a.m. CST

    really?

    by hesky75

    wow boring!

  • April 19, 2007, 6:49 a.m. CST

    Trilogies - Lightwave7871

    by Primus

    Point well made dude. And I totally agree that trilogies are never 100% perfect - I was just surprised by your choice of which entry was weakest! But life would be dull if we all agreed on everything... For the record, I think Exorcist II is the weakest in that trilogy (ignoring the prequels). :-)

  • April 19, 2007, 6:50 a.m. CST

    Grant morrison's The Filth

    by Spartacus Hughs

    Would make a good movie adaptation. Directed by Chris Cunningham. And what's happened to Steve Norrington?

  • April 19, 2007, 6:51 a.m. CST

    How about the Matrix

    by Kloipy

    both of the sequels sucked rock hard cock all night long, till the break of dawn, they got it on, with a two chamber bong

  • April 19, 2007, 6:53 a.m. CST

    We are idiots if we don't see it in theatres

    by Turnquest

    It's nice when you are threatened and insulted by a reviewer...with sticks and stems and leafs and bugs crawling all over.

  • April 19, 2007, 6:53 a.m. CST

    Two Towers Rocked . . .

    by kevinwillis.net

    And X3 was made $459,256,008 worldwide, so even if Spiderman 3 sucks that bad, it'll still do pretty frickin' well because . . . haters are irrelevant. That said, Spidey 3 will do great domestically and dominate foreigh box office, to the tune of at least 600 million and may pass 800 million. And I liked most of the movies that were pointed to as trilogy "ruiners" . . . I love Back to the Futures II & III equally, Return of the Jedi is still my favorite Star Wars film (the final duel with Vader beats all the fancy CGI footwork in the prequels), and Leia's metal bikini, 'nuff said. So I'm pretty sure I'll enjoy 3, although it probably helps I don't worship Gwen Stacy (a story line I was an avid collector during) or Venom (a story line I pretty much completely avoided). But I like Spiderman, I like Sam Raimi, don't care if they reworked Sandman's motivation . . . So I predict this movie will be like an exploding shotgun full of handjobs. That is all.

  • April 19, 2007, 6:54 a.m. CST

    Norrington !

    by hesky75

    He refused to make another film after lxg because of his arguements during filming,rumor had it that he and sean connery almost came to blows!

  • April 19, 2007, 6:55 a.m. CST

    Six words for primus

    by fireclown

    Wasn't no elves at Helms Deep.

  • April 19, 2007, 6:55 a.m. CST

    Spartacus Hughes

    by Affleckwasthebomb

    Doesn't look real to me. I think it's a bit early for posters. I like super heroe films but only in a throw away...way except for Batman. I fricking love Batman and with Nolan I can't wait to see where it goes. Batman is the best non super super heroe in the world.

  • April 19, 2007, 6:58 a.m. CST

    yeah

    by hesky75

    batman rocks, well the last one!

  • April 19, 2007, 7 a.m. CST

    Why do I keep putting an e at the end of hero

    by Affleckwasthebomb

    fucking idiot.

  • April 19, 2007, 7:01 a.m. CST

    The Two Towers rocked. ROTK was the wink link

    by Teamwak

    So that reviewer doesnt know what he's on about then.

  • April 19, 2007, 7:03 a.m. CST

    shannon sossamon for cat woman

    by hesky75

    NOW THATS THE SHIT IM TALKING ABOUT !!!

  • April 19, 2007, 7:07 a.m. CST

    Worst Trilogy ever

    by Kloipy

    Star Wars.

  • April 19, 2007, 7:07 a.m. CST

    Please please please please please please DON'T SUCK

    by Steve Rogers

    I couldn't handle it. Come on Raimi, deliver the goods. Pretty please with sugar on.

  • April 19, 2007, 7:08 a.m. CST

    Two Towers vs RTOK

    by Leopold Scotch

    I agree: I was most hyped up for RTOK out of the three, but in the end, my favourites are Fellowship and Two Towers.

  • April 19, 2007, 7:08 a.m. CST

    orrr cmon

    by hesky75

    that pvc cat suit you know it works! she'd be great!

  • April 19, 2007, 7:09 a.m. CST

    "Le mec le plus frais de Paris"...

    by SpencerTrilby

    Unique review for sure. Next time try not to borrow my Title. I fought hard for it.

  • April 19, 2007, 7:09 a.m. CST

    LOTR is almost unwatchable

    by Turnquest

    I've tried to watch Two Towers, and its boring. Straight up, that's what it is. Heck, it's first-hour of King Kong boring. Fellowship worked and remains the best because it stayed true to the books. Two Towers and ROTK are both flawed because they deviated from the books storyline. Who is Peter Jackson to say that his plot and screenplay would be better structured than Tolkien's ? I mean, are there people out there who still sit around and watch LOTR? Compare to those who watch Harry Potter, or Superman or Aliens or Star Wars. In my circle at least, LOTR has lost any fanlove that it had back in 2003. Pretty much, I'd rather read the books. Enormous CGI battles does not a movie make. Aragorn "dying" and coming back for no reason does not a movie make. Friggin' angel music and elves and Hugo Weaving with giant eyes intoning in that quintessential LOTR flat monotone "THIS IS DEADLY SERIOUS" dialogue doesn't sustain for 9 hours. Any love for language that JRR had was lost in the adaptation, and the whole thing, particularly Parts II and III smack of ennui and actors just going through the motions. As Kevin Smith wrote, they walk, and walk and walk....

  • April 19, 2007, 7:10 a.m. CST

    I mean ROTK

    by Leopold Scotch

    I have seen it (honest) ;)

  • April 19, 2007, 7:10 a.m. CST

    Affleckwasthebomb

    by just pillow talk

    just add a 's' as well...since it returns next week....<p>I second that fireclown!

  • April 19, 2007, 7:13 a.m. CST

    Jurassic Park 2 and 3

    by Kloipy

    were pretty God-awful don't you all think?

  • April 19, 2007, 7:15 a.m. CST

    that's your circle Turnquest...

    by just pillow talk

    Me, I watch LOTR more than the Potter movies, which overall, are pretty weak. The first two, while I understand why they did it, are too kiddified. POA is the best, with GOF next. But again, one can question what they chose to put in the movie and what they chose to keep out. And I would argue that those movies are too bloated...

  • April 19, 2007, 7:16 a.m. CST

    Le Mec le plus frais de Paris, WTF are you on?

    by redtom

    I mean it, that's gotta be some serious shit you're smokin...<p> <p> <p> I reckon the reason why Sony are showing this all over the place before America is coz if they showed it in America first word of mouth would destroy whatever money it would make elsewhere... this is plain old damage control in operation folks...<p> <p> <p> <p>

  • April 19, 2007, 7:24 a.m. CST

    thanks redtom

    by teutoneer

    Finally someone called me a "plant".;o) It's a great honor to be called "plant" on the AICN Talback! Me, the SUPERMAN RETURNS basher!!! Greets, GreekGeek!

  • April 19, 2007, 7:27 a.m. CST

    aunt may and the missing ring

    by Kloipy

    she keeps it hidden in her twatbox which was sewn up in the long, long ago

  • April 19, 2007, 7:28 a.m. CST

    KLOIPY

    by Frijole

    I think JP2 was a total wash. Save for Julianne Moore and the raptor attack in the tall grass. Now JP3 may have been somewhat misguided and the ending WAS a copout. But overall it had a better cast than 2. It brought back Sam Neill. And it also included many of the set-pieces from the two novels that hadn't made it into either of the previous movies. I like it MUCH better than 2... and as the third in a series, it could have been WAY worse than it was. I don't own it... but watch it when it's on. Yeah.

  • April 19, 2007, 7:37 a.m. CST

    frijole

    by Kloipy

    I agree as the the second one being the worst. I'm just saying, it's like the Matrix, as in the first one is classic and the sequels were just made to make tons of money, and lost all of the feeling of the first

  • April 19, 2007, 7:44 a.m. CST

    Are these "official" reviews?

    by Fecal Debris

    Because they've officially given me a boner

  • April 19, 2007, 7:53 a.m. CST

    TTT and ROTK were overblown wank

    by LightninBolt

    Fellowship was great but it's the best book anyway. SM3 looks overindulgent but definitely worth seeing.

  • April 19, 2007, 7:54 a.m. CST

    "Lord of the Rings had the Two Towers"

    by 18to88

    Finally someone said it. That movie was made completely redundant by ROTK. ROTK did everything the Two Towers did, but bigger and better. That was my biggest complaint about ROTK at the time....It is so solid that it overshadows TT and makes it fairly lame.

  • April 19, 2007, 8:02 a.m. CST

    Jesus, people, why are you talking about LOTR???

    by Nice Marmot

    As for Spidey, the negative reviews of 3 make it sound on par w/ 2 for me. Dont' get me wrong, 2 had some great stuff in it, there were just so many scenes I thought were retarded. Pete battling the broom closet while delivering pizzas. The "Raindrops" scene. The stupid elevator scene w/ Hal Sparks. Pete getting his suit back w/out J.J. seeing it happen. The pointless scene where Pete eats cake w/ the landlord's daughter. Just so much stupid shit. Hell, change the GreenGoblin suit and remove Macy Gray from 1 and that movie is 90 times better than 2. I love a good comic book adaptation but I just can't give the Spidey movies the huge geek stamp of approval that so many others do.

  • April 19, 2007, 8:03 a.m. CST

    Alfred Molina acts his socks off

    by smallfry

    Alfred Molina acts his socks off

  • April 19, 2007, 8:04 a.m. CST

    FELLOWSHIP is definitely the best film in the trilogy

    by SpyGuy

    THE TWO TOWERS was the worst of the three, but still entertaining. Still, Jackson should have received his Best Picture for FELLOWSHIP and everyone knows it, which is why ROTK was an apology Oscar.

  • April 19, 2007, 8:12 a.m. CST

    spiderman 2 was good

    by Kloipy

    but I thought it was too long. def. the best of the superhero films imo.

  • April 19, 2007, 8:12 a.m. CST

    Mary Jane kidnapped AGAIN

    by I Dunno

    Christ, is there one comic book movie where this doesn't happen in the last act?

  • April 19, 2007, 8:16 a.m. CST

    too much information

    by BizarroJerry

    There is just too much information out there about this movie. The multiple trailers alone give away far too much of the film. Goddamn studios, thinking we want to know exactly what a movie's about before we see it. And I must continue to bitch about the constant spilling of spoilers all over the internet, with or without warnings. I wish people didn't want to read them. A movie is about watching it, not about just getting all the information on what happens in the plot. When you're expecting and waiting for a "bad" scene you read about, and are anticipating it, you'll hate it all the more. I'm avoiding the biggest spoilers, but I don't like that they're out there at all. Oh, and X-Men 3 was a slightly disappointing, "OK" movie. Batman & Robin was a steaming pile of horse shit. Although, at least farmers can get used to the smell of horse shit.

  • April 19, 2007, 8:21 a.m. CST

    CHILL OUT

    by Kloipy

    The power in that line alone from B&R had enough sleaze to feltch jizm from aunt may's sandy v-jay

  • April 19, 2007, 8:22 a.m. CST

    Another SPOILER FILLED review - negative I'm afraid

    by Mr Gorilla

    On the surface of it, Spider-Man 3 has it all: great cast, amazing effects, and unlike poor X3, the director that helmed the first two. So what are the problems? Well, they're mostly in the script, and in the tone of the thing. The first 20 minutes are confident, lively, funny, exciting, and one sits back in one's seat expecting 2 great hours. What Raimi does over that 2 hours is undermine that trust, bit by bit, so that by the end of the film myself and my four friends looked at each other and said 'What the HELL just happened? That was crap!' SPOILERS follow. Characters just don't make sense: 1. Even though this is the one where Peter Parker is meant to get cocky and arrogant, it still feels like he does stuff out of character. For example, Spider-Man gets handed the keys of the city, and at the ceremony snogs Gwen Stacy - in an echo of THAT upside-down kiss from Spider-Man 1 - in full knowledge that Mary Jane is in the crowd of onlookers. No boyfriend is that stupid, unless they want to chuck their girlfriend. 2. Mary Jane gets fired from a play: you think the first thing she'd do is tell her boyfriend, but - to help the flimsy plot on - she doesn't. For some reason. 3. Later, a villian tells Mary Jane to break up with Peter - which she does. But there's no scene later in the film where she explains to Peter that she was forced to behave like that. Then there's some creaky, creaky storytelling. 1. We flashback to Uncle Ben's death in the first movie - and find out that his killer WASN'T the guy we thought it was, but - wouldn't you know it - one of the villians who's just popped up in the current movie. How convenient. 2. There's a LOT of mumbo jumbo in a short space of time. Mainly the symbiote stuff that leads to Venom, and the 'experiment' that leads to Sandman. Neither of these bits of science feel that someone has attempted to make them believable, in the way that they did with Doc Ock's experiments in Spider-Man 2. In that film they took the time and as a result you bought in to the whole thing so much more. 3. The old cliched trick of showing a news reporter is used: except it's maybe the least confincing news reporter I've ever seen on film. And they employ this device at the point where the big final action scene is beginning. Which kind of pulls you out of things. 4. Evil Harry Osborn gets knocked on the head, and temporarily loses his memory, forgetting all the Green Goblin stuff. So he can have lots of nice scenes with Peter and Mary Jane about how they are friends, and we can watch him turn evil all over again. How convenient. Later - at the end of the film - he turns good. But by that time anyone in the audience with a brain is saying 'Jesus wept!' 5. If you've already used the 'news reporter' way of telling a story, don't worry, there's always the chiche of 'butler who has seen more than he previously gave away, and talks some sense into his master'. That's what they do here. And the tone! Man they get it wrong. 1.When Peter turns 'bad' there's a terrible, terrible sequence that culminates in a dance which is only comparable to Will Ferrell's 'Jazz Flute' scene in Anchorman. Parker is skidding all over the bar, dancing on tables, defying gravity - it just feels like a lame comedy sketch. So, as an audience you disconnect a bit more. 2. And bang in the final scene, there's a TERRIBLE little skit where JJonah Jameson tried to buy a camera off a little girl - it jsut goes on and on and on. END SPOILERS Final thoughts. The action is fine - but it's kind of all the same - people fighting in mid-air. So the law of diminishing returns comes in to play. The first fight, with Green Goblin 2, is stunning. But by the big finale, you feel a bit Meh! Sandman to me feels like a flawed character for a movie, in that he's just an effect (imagine that desert stuff from The Mummy - but done a bit better) so you lose the actor's performance. Hayden Church never gets the chance to shine like Willem Defoe or Alfred Molina. Oh, one more thing. Danny Elfman famously left the project, and a guy called Christopher Young is reworking his themes. Or more specifically, reworking THAT theme, again and again and again. Pretty much every time Spider-Man appears. It significantly marrs the film. At a key point at the end, Spidey lands in front of a big American flag and the music swells. For god's sake - even Superman Returns had the sense to tone down the '...and the American Way' stuff. On the upside, Bruce Campbell is funny funny in this one. Won't spoil it for you, but in this cinema of 2,000 plus, his was the one sequence where I felt that the audience truly woke up.

  • April 19, 2007, 8:25 a.m. CST

    What's even sadder

    by Mr Gorilla

    At the end of X2 it looked like we were on our way to a brilliant brilliant trilogy - like the original Star Wars, or Back to the Future, or Lord of the Rings. X3 cocked that up, and also manages to devalue the other two. Spider-Man 3 does the same thing. Everyone who goes to this site - and therefore cares deeply about movies - deserves something better.

  • April 19, 2007, 8:30 a.m. CST

    Fuck The Napkin

    by Fuck The Napkin

    Nah, Spider-Man 3's certainly no worse than the other two. If anything, it's slightly better. It's just really uninspiring how similar it is to the previous movies in setup, feel, dialogue, story, action, etc. It's like another two and a half hours of Spider-Man 2.

  • April 19, 2007, 8:31 a.m. CST

    What a knob

    by Fuck The Napkin

    I put my name in the subject line. Doh!

  • April 19, 2007, 8:31 a.m. CST

    I'm sure its a good movie but I dont believe the review

    by Cotton McKnight

    that absolutely gushed over this, calling it "iconic" and what not. Why? Because this guy clearly believes the previous two Spiderman's were "iconic" as well, and I don't know a person alive who shares that view. Sure they are fun and the first one had GREAT timing (after 9/11) but other than the whole kiss scene in the first movie (which I will admit is iconic because its been imitated/parodied endlessly), can anyone think of a single scene that is really memorable? I mean really, really memorable? To the level of ET, Jaws, etc etc? Of course you cant. Well this guy can, and thats why I dont believe a word he says.

  • April 19, 2007, 8:33 a.m. CST

    Just be happy you even get a Spiderman movie

    by Kloipy

    it could be much worse. I mean look at the rape of most of the comics we love. Fuck Star Wars

  • April 19, 2007, 8:35 a.m. CST

    Kloipy...

    by BizarroJerry

    Worse than "Chill out" was the unforgiveable "Take two of these, and call me in the morning." God almighty, it's a cliched cliche. How could someone put that down on paper? How could they type it out? How could Arnold even say it? Now, I hate to dredge up this stuff, but when confirmed the line above, I came upon the quote page from IMDB. Check out the horror: http://tinyurl.com/2evs8p

  • April 19, 2007, 8:36 a.m. CST

    All you fanboys...

    by Kid Z

    ... just HAD to have Venom in the film, Had to! Same for Gwen Stacey even though that character was a complete mismatch for Raimi's Spidey-verse. Well, you got your wish... Venom and Gwen are shoehorned in... and of course it negatively effects the pace and plot of the 3rd Spidey film. Happy now geeks?

  • April 19, 2007, 8:38 a.m. CST

    ICE TO SEE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    by Kloipy

    AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA WTF!!!!!! hahahahaahahahahahahaha Bizarro, i'm with you on that one buddy

  • April 19, 2007, 8:41 a.m. CST

    I'll tell you how than can do it

    by Kloipy

    money. Most movies now are so out of control with cheese. It's just like did they seriously let a 9 year old austistic kid, wired out on 7 year old Surge and pixie sticks write the screen play for this crap?

  • April 19, 2007, 8:42 a.m. CST

    AUNT MAYS RING

    by TheAllSeeingEye

    That just made me laugh out so loud at work that people are sat staring at me.<br><br>Anyway, i have nothing but high hopes for this movie. A friend of mine has also caught a screening and has assured me it's the best movie of them all. I'd love to read more of the negative reviews, but there's spoilers in there but, from what I did read, it seems mostly to be people nitpicking.

  • April 19, 2007, 8:43 a.m. CST

    Or hows about...

    by Kid Z

    ... Arrnuldt in those "Visit California" PSAs?... "Cuhlifahrrnyuh! I like! Is nice!"

  • April 19, 2007, 8:47 a.m. CST

    remember when Robin said

    by Kloipy

    Cowabunga! when he was surfing down the roof. That was one of parts of my life I wish I could erase.

  • April 19, 2007, 8:49 a.m. CST

    Aunt May: pain in the ass

    by BizarroJerry

    Yes, Aunt May is truly the biggest pain in the ass in comic book history. Back when I was a kid watching "Spider-man and His Amazing Friends" I recognized this. Does anyone bring down a superhero story and ruin everyone's fun like Aunt May? Oh no, is Aunt May okay? Aunt May's sick! Someone kidnapped Aunt May! Aunt May hates Spider-man! What will happen to Aunt May? Ugh.

  • April 19, 2007, 8:49 a.m. CST

    I WROTE I OF THE REVIEW ABOVE

    by FRESHEST GUY IN PARIS

    IF YOU WANT TO SHARE SOME IDEAS ON THE THE MOVIE JUST ASK...I'LL BE PLEASED TO ANSWER

  • April 19, 2007, 8:57 a.m. CST

    Aunt May: Hot Piece of Ass

    by Kloipy

    come on, you know all of you would hit that

  • April 19, 2007, 8:58 a.m. CST

    3 full spidey movies

    by charm_of_making

    and no even remotely acceptable goblin. for shame.

  • April 19, 2007, 8:59 a.m. CST

    Dancing in my head

    by smallfry

    The dancing scene sounds pretty bad. But nothing could be as bad as Doc Oc's monologue in numebr 2. Voices...in my head...

  • April 19, 2007, 9 a.m. CST

    cool convo

    by Kloipy

    it would go like this. Your Friend: Hey dude, you ever sleep with someone famous? You: Yeah I banged that broad from Spiderman! Your Friend: who? Kirsten Dunst? You: No way man, Aunt fuckin' May, dude. YOur friend: Holy shit, let me suck your cock. You deserve it.

  • April 19, 2007, 9:03 a.m. CST

    So far it all seems great.

    by Mooly

    The two positive reviews are a little hard to take seriously when one guy actually says that Topher Grace has only done Eric Foreman in movies (which is BS) and says that bad-spidey isn't "bad ass" enough...and the other guy complains that in a movie with like 7 actions scenes the story is too slow? Sounds like weak criticism too me from people who think S3 should have been nothing but 90 minutes of spiderman killing people.

  • April 19, 2007, 9:06 a.m. CST

    I'm a cool American

    by SithMenace

    and I've never described something cool as being an eye fucker. Just sayin'.<p>And Spider-Man 2 was great filmmaking. Almost everything in that movie added to it's greatness, including the broom closet scene. If three sucks it's Kharma for what Raimi did to Elfman, although it will affect Raimi in practically no way whatsoever.

  • April 19, 2007, 9:13 a.m. CST

    ONE MAJOR THING I FORGOT TO WRITE IN MY REVIEW !!!!!

    by FRESHEST GUY IN PARIS

    BEWARE OF SPOILERS !!! On the final action scene, to fight Venom and Sandamn Spidey jumps on harry's glider. Harry being right behind SPidey, this is one the gayest thing that I saw on screen since Cruising with Al Pacino. Like I wrote before I loved the movie even if it's to long. Le Mec Le Plus frais de Paris

  • April 19, 2007, 9:13 a.m. CST

    Mooly - Its slow with 7 action scenes...

    by Lightwave7871

    not because I wanted to see nothing but action, it has more action than Spidey 2 for example, but the action, although well done for the most part, feels like its just cut in to break up the character scenes... as I said earlier in the talk back, its kinda like Phantom Menace (though nowhere near as bad as a movie), in so far as you get long plodding scenes which are intercut with action set pieces that feel like a different movie... If Rami could have had the emotional story tie up with Peter and MJ without the black suit fucking things up, the movie would have been a smoother ride but instead you get the emotional scenes from the past two films played out all over again, peter pushing away those he loves etc etc and it has a drawn out feel so when the action does come it feels like something put in to hold the audiences interest rather than a key moment of the story....

  • April 19, 2007, 9:16 a.m. CST

    A few thoughts...

    by Childe Roland

    ...uponm reading all of this:<p>First, I'm still way irritated with Quint's habit of characterizing a review as a positive or a negative in the preface to that review. Let the fucking reviews speak for themselves and, if you don't think they're doing that well enough, don't use them.<p>Second, I'm kind of surprised at all the Two Towers hate. For my money, that's the best of the bunch (ROTK could've been better if Jackson had streamlined some of his twelve endings and Fellowship, while necessary, is largely just set-up).<p>And lastly, it seems like this movie is going to divide folks along the same lines they were divided on when the villains were first leaked. Some folks like Venom a lot (I tend to think of these follks as the kids who started buying comics in the 90s and who consider the cartoons canon). Some prefer the classic villains (I probably fall into this latter category). I think the Sandman, as described, sounds pretty perfectly adapted and like a very compelling villain. Venom seems to have been given appropriate screen time for what he is (I lump Venom in with Bizarro and Reverse Flash and Prometheus as some of the most uninspired villains of all time).<p>The only thing that sounds like a disappointment is the way they're using Gwen. I really hoped that Gwen would enter the franchise just in time for them to kill off MJ and truly distinguish this as a an altrernate reality kind of Spidey where events still end up being parallel to the comics we know. Sounds kind of like she was shoehorned into this.<p>Still, I'm very much looking forward to this movie.

  • April 19, 2007, 9:18 a.m. CST

    I Dunno

    by Kal El Vis

    There WAS a comic-book film without a "KIDNAPPED damsel in distress" ending...Superman: The Movie. And guess what? The best superhero movie ever made, in my opinion anyway......

  • April 19, 2007, 9:21 a.m. CST

    I'll be killed for this

    by Kloipy

    but i can't stand Superman. Seriously, it sucks.

  • April 19, 2007, 9:23 a.m. CST

    SO GAY

    by FRESHEST GUY IN PARIS

    When you'll see Harry and Spidey flying together on the glider, and being so happy to do it. It looks excactly like an episode of the ambiguous gay duo.

  • April 19, 2007, 9:25 a.m. CST

    Roland

    by Kloipy

    I agree with you about TT. And I feel you on the whole Venom thing. But you know, I couldn't imagine what it must be like to be in Sam's shoes. I mean just think of the pressure that man is under to make something that unites fans. I mean the guy isn't God. I think he's done the best job that he could which is more than I can say for most directors out there today

  • April 19, 2007, 9:26 a.m. CST

    I choose to watch SPIDER-MAN 3 spoiler free.

    by JDanielP

    I hate having to skim this stuff. But this is too important to me. When I was a kid, I had difficulty in choosing my favorite superhero, Spider-man or Batman. But I came to the realization that... although I was enjoying the Spider-man comics much more (at that particular time), Batman was my favorite character. Hey, ...it's a tough decision, but ya have to draw the line somewhere. And hell yes, I'm looking forward to this. And cheers to "THE DARK KNIGHT" in '08.

  • April 19, 2007, 9:28 a.m. CST

    Just think what would have happened

    by Kloipy

    had this movie been in the hands of Mark Steven Johnson, or Mike Bay, you know.

  • April 19, 2007, 9:28 a.m. CST

    How can you dare to say Superman sucks ?

    by FRESHEST GUY IN PARIS

    Heve you ever seen a scene as beautiful as the scee when clark says bye to his mom and she says: I always knew you would leave. Or the monologue of Brando "the father becomes the son..etc.." are you crazy. Next time you say something like that, I'd rather fuck aunt May than hearing it

  • April 19, 2007, 9:35 a.m. CST

    Fresh Guy....

    by Lightwave7871

    You need to take a chill pill or something... ok you thought Harry and Peter looked gay on the glider, we get it... As I recall the scene though, I think your interpretation of it says more about you than it does about the film...

  • April 19, 2007, 9:36 a.m. CST

    well i guess you'll be fucking aunt may a lot then

    by Kloipy

    I've seen many scenes as beautiful as that. I know a ton of people love Superman, that's cool. I just don't. I just find the whole thing boring.

  • April 19, 2007, 9:37 a.m. CST

    "What's everybody looking at?"

    by BizarroJerry

    Sorry, just a quick "ambiguous gay duo" shoutout. And I also apologize for using the term "shoutout"...

  • April 19, 2007, 9:37 a.m. CST

    FRESHEST GUY IN PARIS

    by ManosTHOF

    Simple answer: because there are haters for everything. People who want to stand out by being contrary. Hell, in one of those reviews, Godfather II was criticized / implied as being long and boring. I'm sure if Cool Hand Luke or Raiders of the Lost Ark or any other genuinely great film came up in the discussion they would be hated on by someone.

  • April 19, 2007, 9:37 a.m. CST

    Agreed Cotton

    by The Mothman

    Sam Raimi seems like he has his heart in the right place with everything he's involved in, and is more than capable of setting up great scenes, but sometimes I wonder what images James Cameron would have bought to the screen. Alas, when you start thinking of the 'what-if's with the Spidey films, it becomes a long, sometimes harrowing discussion.

  • April 19, 2007, 9:40 a.m. CST

    DANCE NUMBER IN SPIDEY 3 = LIPS ON OPTIMUS

    by Pound Sand

    Although there's no way this movie will bomb because Tobey, Kiki and Sam are all involved.

  • April 19, 2007, 9:41 a.m. CST

    I'm not trying to be different

    by Kloipy

    I just don't like superman. That's all I'm saying. Sure peoples tastes differ. That's a part of life. I'm sure some of you hate "classics" as well. Some people also love movies just to jump on the bandwagon.

  • April 19, 2007, 9:41 a.m. CST

    'Even Superman Toned Down the American Way Stuff'

    by kevinwillis.net

    Yeah, and that really helped. World wide gross for 'Superman Returns' was $391,081,192, and only $200 million domestically--about $50 million less than its rumoured budget (which, to be fair, included the cost of all the pre-Singer false starts). <br><br> By comparison, the original 1978 Superman, which did not tone down that "American Way" stuff, grossed a world wide, inflation adjusted $928,225,777-approximately $300 mil in 1978 dollars. Inflation adjusted, even Superman II came in around $750 mil in today's dollars. Don't be surprised when Spiderman 3's domestic gross tops $450 million compared to Superman Returns anemic $200 mil (which, inflation adjusted, is about as much as Superman III made with Richard Pryor as a whacky builder of evil computers!).<br><br> But people who think toning down that "American Way" stuff in superhero movies about American's, in American cities, fighting bad guys and saving lives are uniformly jackasses. So, I don't think Raimi has to worry about their negative reviews. <br><br> It would be like Speilberg worrying over bad reviews of "Schindler's List" by neo-nazis who, when not busy shaving their heads and working out, read and re-read "Mein Kampf" in their parent's basement. <br><Br> "I don't know Sam. That big American flag is really likely to alienate the 'Death to America' crowd. Maybe we should make it a giant Koran? Or a sickle & hammer? That would really bring in the pro-communist workers!"<br><br> Feh.

  • April 19, 2007, 9:42 a.m. CST

    I'm getting hated on

    by Kloipy

    just for expressing my opinion.

  • April 19, 2007, 9:42 a.m. CST

    some one brought luggage to the theater

    by Darth Hater

    Spiderslayer seems to have brought some baggage with him. I Hope it's great!

  • April 19, 2007, 9:50 a.m. CST

    Superheroes Kicking Ass Are Gay

    by kevinwillis.net

    Because what are they kicking? They are kicking ass. Any why? Because they are so obviously gay. <br><br>Why has every thing got to be gay? And I say this as someone who often likes to point out when things are gay. But everything doesn't have to be gay. Why can't Harry and Peter ride on the glider together, and work together as a single heterosexual unit--like a new superhero, called The Harry Peter.<br><br> Where are the Broke Back jokes? Why do I even read these talk backs any more if there aren't going to be any Broke Back jokes? Brock Back Venom? Come on, something. Preferably in trailer form. Re-cut trailer splices that make it seem like the movie is really about the dudes in them movie being gay . . . they rock. <br><br> BTW, Two Towers rocked. It was totally NOT gay. <br><br>And French guy--isn't just being in France gay? That's what I've always thought. Be a man and move to Germany or Italy.

  • April 19, 2007, 9:52 a.m. CST

    Kloipy . . .

    by kevinwillis.net

    Have you ever read a Talkback before? That's what happens. You say what you think, and then you are attacked for it. Or you say what you are pretending to think, and then you are attacked for it, or smarter people attack you for saying something you don't really think like you do think it just to stir shit up. <br><br> It's a Talkback. Do not participate for a boost in self-esteem.

  • April 19, 2007, 9:53 a.m. CST

    Kloipy - don't worry dude

    by just pillow talk

    I completely agree with you on Superman Returns. Yes, there were some beautiful scenes, but the plot sucked. Superman did not act like the character of Superman, and of course they ignored the effects of kryptonite. Aunt May is free, so commence with the screwing Freshest Guy...

  • April 19, 2007, 9:55 a.m. CST

    c'mon kevinwillis.net...

    by just pillow talk

    the Transformer talkbacks are full of such love and harmony and goodwill...

  • April 19, 2007, 9:56 a.m. CST

    Kevin,

    by Kloipy

    I know man, i've been on here for awhile. And def. not looking to boost anything. I just think it's funny that these people can be such hypocrites.

  • April 19, 2007, 9:57 a.m. CST

    i would have hated to see the TB's for

    by Kloipy

    Shindler's List. I can only imagine

  • April 19, 2007, 9:58 a.m. CST

    I wrote the thing on the Godfater Part 2

    by FRESHEST GUY IN PARIS

    I guess I have been missunderstood. How could I criticize Godfather part 2. This is one of the most perfectly done film ever. But this is a movie you love for its slow pace. You know the story unflods on a 50 years period. It deserves a slow pace. But for spiderman, come on man, the movie last 2 hour 20, such a long time to say so little. It is a terrible exemple but look at woody allen's movie. 1 h 20 minutes, and so many thing said, so many surprises. 5I know it's a bad example) The biggest problem of spidey 3 is the poor ryhtm, At some moment you guess they cut some scene cause it was really too long. So the movie speeds up sudenly (Venom unites with Sandman) Some point remains in the dark why MJ accepts quit Peter under Harry's pressure, what's at stake ? And at the same time Raimi kept this terrible interviewer that acts like a bad replica of aprile o'neil from the TNMT anime. I still mainain I love the movie anyway, I am no hater. I am just looking for a little fight that's all

  • April 19, 2007, 9:58 a.m. CST

    Aunt May: pain in the ass, or piece of ass?

    by Pound Sand

    For Spidey 4, McG should cast Rose McGowan as Aunt May.

  • April 19, 2007, 10:07 a.m. CST

    Has anyone seen the "Faust: Love of the Damned" movie

    by Kloipy

    That movie is hillarious

  • April 19, 2007, 10:11 a.m. CST

    Transformer Talkbacks . . .

    by kevinwillis.net

    Everytime I started to read them, I'd see words like "flames" and "nipples" and I'd zone out like Homer dreaming of a donut.<br><br> Don't ask me to explain. <br><br> Schindler's List was a little pre-AICN Talkbacks. But I can guess how it would have gone. "Spielberg has sold out." "Most BORING Movie ever. Black & White! So artsy!" "The holocaust is gay!" "I can't believe he cast the guy from Darkman! What the hell was he smoking?!?!?!" "THE JEWS RUN HOLLYWOOD!!!" "Too Soon!" "Nipples on Schindler?" Something like that.

  • April 19, 2007, 10:12 a.m. CST

    LOLOLOL Kevin

    by Kloipy

    yep Nazi's gotta eat

  • April 19, 2007, 10:15 a.m. CST

    Just when i thought i could get rid of Superman Returns

    by DarthBakpao

    ... from my memory, coming this May people will start to make comparison between those two. Superman Returns was "good", especially on DVD, all thanks to the fast-forward button so i don't have to sit through those boring moments (and there were plenty of 'em)

  • April 19, 2007, 10:15 a.m. CST

    or "hitler killed the jews but I looked over and Kurt

    by Kloipy

    Russell was laughing so it's ok"

  • April 19, 2007, 10:16 a.m. CST

    To kevinwilis..

    by FRESHEST GUY IN PARIS

    I Do not what to say, what to answer. Lol for the Hetero sexual unit ! I totally agree It's great to point out gay things, a little bit homophobic i guess but so fun. Everybody needs a little of that, a little bit of racism, antisemitsm to make the society works. and I mean a little bit just in jokes. I did not know than being french would make me gay. I thought it would make me complain about everything, wearing a black beret and eating a baguette in front of the eiffel tower and also selling jews to germans. I guess I was wrong. Do not worry I know we are a terrible country but I wish I had a president with cowboy boots.

  • April 19, 2007, 10:18 a.m. CST

    I Can See Schindler's Balls!

    by kevinwillis.net

    Seriously, Ain't It Cool ought to have "Back in Time!" special articles where Harry or Quint or someone give tongue and cheek reviews of movies from the 90s and 80s and, heck, even 30s. <br><br>"Harry Say's He Would Definitely GIVE A DAMN About Scarlett!" With the requisite Hollywood gossip about David O. Selznick and Spencter Tracy and Katherine Hepburn. And the TBers would have to play along! "Deviates from the source material! How could they cast a British actress as Scarlett? Were they pinching laudanum?!?" "Glorifies slavery! Shouldn't be surprising because it was MADE BY JEWS!" "I'm straight as an arrow and still Clark Gable gives me a Massive Pants Pole!" And so on. Good fun!

  • April 19, 2007, 10:23 a.m. CST

    Harry sinks his fangs into Nosferatu

    by Kloipy

    Mori gives biting satire

  • April 19, 2007, 10:26 a.m. CST

    Frenchest Guy In Paris

    by kevinwillis.net

    I love the cowboy boots. Main reason I voted for Bush, that and the video where he does his hair before an interview by brushing it with his hand once and then flipping off the camera. That rocked.<br><br>Seriously, I like French people a lot. The bread. The fries. Multiple mistresses. Not having to take a bath. The French have given us a lot of great things. Like the Statue of Liberty, and Kirsten Dunst as Marie Antoinette. <bR><br> I've been to France once (in 1982), and I stayed at a hotel that backed up against a small excavated Roman-era arena. That had been converted into a little park type of thing. That was so cool. <br><bR> Thomas Jefferson observed that the French live a life of sensuality and art, that there are parks every few blocks, that there is a fountain (it seemd to him) on every street corner.<br><br> Paris is, indeed, very beautiful. And we all know that beautiful cities make you gay.<br><br> While waiting for movies about muscular men who swing around the city in tights is a highly masculine, heterosexual thing we American's like to do. <br><br>And I am secure enough in my manhood to admit that I find Bruce Campbell a little attractive. Must be that two weeks in France. Now, as a French waiter . . . damn, this I gotta see.

  • April 19, 2007, 10:29 a.m. CST

    Quint has a whale of a time at Orca

    by Kloipy

    Capone goes directly to jail in the Crying Game

  • April 19, 2007, 10:29 a.m. CST

    Sphincter Tracy

    by kevinwillis.net

    Seriously, the "Spencter" Tracy thing was a typo, and has nothing to do with a lifelong animus towards Spencer Tracy because he got to diddle a young Katherine Hepburn and I never will. <br><br>Now someone else needs to bring up something that has nothing to do with Spiderman 3. This could easily become . . . the Greatest TalkBack of All Time! (insert echo)

  • April 19, 2007, 10:31 a.m. CST

    Does Angelina Jolies poop smell really bad?

    by Kloipy

    because I imagine that she takes really large dumps

  • April 19, 2007, 10:36 a.m. CST

    Maybe she smears her period blood on the walls

    by Kloipy

    in order to save the world

  • April 19, 2007, 10:36 a.m. CST

    Whale of a Time at Orca!

    by kevinwillis.net

    Man, that movie bored me. Of course, it came out when my favorite movie was "The Big Bus" (a movie that just begs for a remake, if you ask me). Wasn't it like Richard Harris (who I love) and Bo Derek walking around on ice looking for shadows? And some salty old sea tales that sounded suspciously regurgiated from Jaws?<br><br> "Harry says: Jaws is Tasty!" "Quint Has Seen ROTJ and says Ewoks Rule! Sorry, Haters!" "Can A Car Be The Hottest Chick in a Movie? It can if it's John Carpenter's 'Christine'!" "Harry Says Likeable Sam J. Jones, the New 'Flash Gordon', is destined for a Long and Illustrious Film Career!" "'Taxi Driver' is an Intense Ride, But Travis Bickle is Tragically Miscast!"

  • April 19, 2007, 10:38 a.m. CST

    Angelina Jolie Hates Her Father

    by kevinwillis.net

    And gets her revenge by phoning in crappy performances in crappy movies.<br><br> That is all.

  • April 19, 2007, 10:38 a.m. CST

    Harry gets the jitters from Critters!

    by Kloipy

    Capone loves the deadly sin in The Goonies! Harry goes on autopilot during Flight of the Navigator!

  • April 19, 2007, 10:40 a.m. CST

    just pillow talk, and others...

    by Kal El Vis

    I said SUPERMAN: THE MOVIE, not that piece of shit Superman Returns. How ANYONE can make THAT mistake, I'll never know....

  • April 19, 2007, 10:41 a.m. CST

    Harry says The Garbage Pail Kids Movies is the best

    by Kloipy

    movie he's ever seen! Mori wants NOTHING to do with the NeverEnding Story

  • April 19, 2007, 10:41 a.m. CST

    I'd Love to See a "First Time" Review from Harry

    by kevinwillis.net

    (Or Quint, or Moriarty) of movies like "Goonies" and "Tron" and "My Science Project" and "War Games"--a cautionary tale of the futility of Ronald Reagan's arms build up!--and "Temple of Doom" and "Last Star Fighter" (which we almost kind of got not that long ago). <br><br> That's probably just me, tho.

  • April 19, 2007, 10:43 a.m. CST

    Superman Returns was a Great Movie . . .

    by kevinwillis.net

    If you want your childhood raped. Or if you want to sleep in the theater. Or if you want to feel that an eight dollar movie ticket was the biggest fucking waste of money in your life, and you would have been happier sending $1000 bucks to Nigerian scammers. Superman Returns was great for that, too. And am I the only one who felt that Superman was a little gay in that movie? Kind of, you know . . . French?

  • April 19, 2007, 10:45 a.m. CST

    kevinwillis.net

    by Kal El Vis

    "Superman" was VERY "emo" in that shitfest. No doubt.

  • April 19, 2007, 10:45 a.m. CST

    Two Towers WAS the weakest

    by Razorback

    It was messy. Sure, it had some of the coolest sequences, but then so did Return of the Jedi. However, like Jedi, Towers feels like a movie poorly constructed. There is a reason for that... it was pieced together after the whole screenplay had been written. Towers was an afterthought because they didn't expect to make all 3 movies.

  • April 19, 2007, 10:50 a.m. CST

    So it's an 'eye fucker' with 'no emotional cliffs'?

    by raw_bean

    That hilariously bad review deserves 'tons of treasures of hate'.

  • April 19, 2007, 10:51 a.m. CST

    Totally agree

    by FRESHEST GUY IN PARIS

    Yep you're right we do have a nice country thank you. I would never die for my country, cause it's a stupid project to die for something that makes you pay taxes. But still I have to say that we do bathe. We have the dirtiest sidewalk ever, but we wash. And we're not crazy about Jerry Lewis also. Thank god This generation is dying. This country is getting too old to remain populated with frenchmen, we should become something else I guess. Something with more entousiasm and youth. Old people not knowing who is Will Ferrel are killing me. Use to live in the US myself and you're right, you guys are so ignorent and narrow-minded (I know you never said that,it was for my own pleasure) but at te same time your country invented the air Jordan. I do not know where to stand. I love America and at the same, I want to burn your O'Reilley. (guy form fox) To go back on spiderman... I have to say that you guys make people dream big enough to make a movie about a patriotic superhero. There's not a single chance that we could make a Rat-man a french superhero waving the french flag. It would be so pathetic. Our actors look to rude or to gay, I guess. It is a problem. I can wait to see the Captain America movie, I am sure it would do great in France;-)

  • April 19, 2007, 11 a.m. CST

    from the "eye fucker guy" who deserves tons of hate

    by FRESHEST GUY IN PARIS

    I know my review is not that great, but come on man, i tried my best. I tried to write with generosity, And that's what counts. I guess there's some stupid parts and I lost a lot of my english. Sorry You know what to appologize i'd love to fuck your mom, so we are square. What do you think ?

  • April 19, 2007, 11:04 a.m. CST

    Geez, Frenchie, calm down, man...

    by redtom

    ... did you not take that chill pill the doctor recommended earlier?<p> <p>

  • April 19, 2007, 11:08 a.m. CST

    Superman Returns

    by kwisatzhaderach

    What a fucking piece of shit. SUPERMAN THE MOVIE is the greatest comic book movie ever and always will be. Bryan Singer, you are truly devoid of talent to screw up making a Superman movie. Superman III and IV may suck but at least they got the character of Superman right in them.

  • April 19, 2007, 11:16 a.m. CST

    Ignorant And Narrowminded Americans

    by kevinwillis.net

    Actually, that's just a put on. The whole "don't know shit, don't read, don't know nuthin' except wrestling and McDonald's and Budweiser" . . . the whole thing is an act to piss off snooty French people. They teach it to us in nursery school. Normally, when I meet people from Paris, I ask them: "Paris, Texas or Paris, Tennessee? And why do you talk so funny?"

  • April 19, 2007, 11:23 a.m. CST

    Burn my O'Rielly?

    by kevinwillis.net

    Seriously, Frenchy, keep your hands off my O'Rielly. I've heard about guys like you.<br><br> Actually, O'Rielly is a jack ass. But I like him and I like his show. Sort of the same way I like a lot loudmouth TalkBackers. Of course, I'm a rock-ribbed, flag wavin' conservative Republican--and of the opinion that the more Europe hates us, the better we must be doing.<br><br> However, that doesn't mean I wouldn't want you to fuck my mother. She likes wussy men. And she speaks French! Although she's about as old as Aunt May, so you might want to reconsider . . . although, technically, it wasn't my mother you were originally offering to fuck. So I hope I'm not being too presumptious. <br><br> Just ribbin' ya. Like a French Tickler, I rib for your pleasure. You have a fine review. And I'm looking forward to seeing S3, and nobody is gonna rain on my enthusiasm.

  • April 19, 2007, 11:29 a.m. CST

    no total

    by Kloipy

    are you hitting on me or something?

  • April 19, 2007, 11:32 a.m. CST

    Whoever put up the Joker link - AWSOME JOB!

    by kinghenryVIII

    That looks great - here's to hoping it stays like that.<p>I'll watch this for the fighting scenes - Spiderman - but that's it. Give me more Batman anyday! I would wait to just rent this but I am feeling the action will look better on the big screen.

  • April 19, 2007, 11:35 a.m. CST

    Actually, kwisatzhaderach...

    by Kal El Vis

    It's easy to fuck-up Superman if you have NO IDEA who the character is. If you go on some "hazy" childhood memories of a movie, combined with what MUST be a love for cheesy soap-opera "drama", you are BOUND to fail. And fail he did.

  • April 19, 2007, 11:38 a.m. CST

    Why not Kill Spiderman?

    by kevinwillis.net

    Mary Jane and Peter have hot sex in spiderweb and just as they both orgasm simultaneously Venom kills them both and then the Hulk kills Venom.<br><br> Leading logically to the next Hulk movie: Edward Norton and Brad Pitt in "Hulk Club". First rule: Don't make me angry. Second rule: Don't make me angry. Third Rule: You wouldn't like me when I'm angry. Then it turns out Bruce Banner's just nuts and Hulk is just a figment of his trouble imagination.

  • April 19, 2007, 11:40 a.m. CST

    TOTAL FUCKING DESTRUCTION . . .

    by kevinwillis.net

    Totally wants to do Kloipy. He wants to give Kloipy wet sloppy coffee-and-cigarette kisses.<br><br> Although, word on the street is that the TOTAL FUCKING DESTRUCTION only lasts about TOTALLY FIFTEEN SECONDS, so don't get your hopes up.

  • April 19, 2007, 11:41 a.m. CST

    LOLOLOL that would be a much better Hulk movie

    by Kloipy

    and it ends with a hulk-like curbing

  • April 19, 2007, 11:41 a.m. CST

    TT Extended edition is far better than the theatrical

    by CrichtonAstronut

    The most improved I'd say. While the other two were enhanced by the added scenes, I think The Two Towers really needed them. When I went to see it in theaters I was really hyped to see and after a little put off by how often they cut from one story line to the other just as I was starting to get in to that part. It became very distracting. The extended cut slows the pace and deepens each storyline so I really get into each arc before shifting gears into one of the other. And transitions seemed much smoother for it. I think the extended cut was really closer to the structure PJ wanted when he made the film. What makes it all the more impressive is that it had to start in the middle and end in the middle and work dramatically, and in the exended cut it does. That said, ROTK kicks major, league ass, and Fellowship is exquisitly rendered, and maintain their basic structure in both versions.

  • April 19, 2007, 11:44 a.m. CST

    Well he did say it was the express lane

    by Kloipy

    and he probably doesn't even cuddle afterwards

  • April 19, 2007, 11:47 a.m. CST

    God bless you

    by FRESHEST GUY IN PARIS

    I'll be happy your mom too. I love to bring my help anywhere i can. What do you mean by talking funny ? Does it mean agressive, or does it mean poor english ? Anyway go see S3, you're smart enough to see what works and what doesn't. Who needs those reviews, one written from a german (i mean come on like those guy knows anything about art, they are germans the joke is already inside their name) A greek guy, that calls himself the greekgeek how low can you go ? As if the're was enough money in his country and waste to produce geeks inside the society. And a frenchguy such as myself who makes up expression like eye fucker just to to sound a little bit more american. What a looser league to review this movie. This is the first time that i write talkbacks it's so addictive, and i the same you waste some much time. I love it. You always have a guy who wants to link the subject you are talking about to lord of the rings. (What a terrible movie by the way, so goyish) Spiderman that's a jewish super hero. That's why I love the guy also. In the outside he's a looser who doesn't fit in. But inside he's strong and has a good heart. This is the jewish soul that's told in this movie. For example Batman is totally a gentile super hero. What jew on earth with money, a huge mansion,( a mansion, no jews has a mansion) would risk his life to serve a death wish. The guy would to the shrink and that's it period. This is my point of view. It engages only myself of course

  • April 19, 2007, 11:48 a.m. CST

    $150 million dollar weekend

    by Mr Incredible

    Bad reviews or not, this movie will make a crap load of money. It will have mine that weekend (money, not crap,so to speak).

  • April 19, 2007, 11:52 a.m. CST

    Freshest Guy

    by Kloipy

    what the hell are you talking about? Also, i hope you are joking, because you just came off as the most pathetic person I've ever heard

  • April 19, 2007, 11:54 a.m. CST

    I think

    by Kal El Vis

    He's trying to be "funny". He should try harder.

  • April 19, 2007, 11:55 a.m. CST

    Of course i am joking

    by FRESHEST GUY IN PARIS

    How can you believe I would be serious.

  • April 19, 2007, 11:55 a.m. CST

    does Total Fucking Destruction mean

    by Kloipy

    gay sex? because it sure sounds like it does. Oh yeah, I also heard that Brad baked a loaf of bread out of Angelina's crusty yeast infection. and they shared it with Maddox. Destruct that bitch

  • April 19, 2007, 11:57 a.m. CST

    well then bravo my friend

    by Kloipy

    because you really have done justice for your people

  • April 19, 2007, 11:57 a.m. CST

    "We saw it with Batman Forever and Batman & Robin"

    by The Artist FKA Vesuvio

    Uh-oh.

  • April 19, 2007, 11:58 a.m. CST

    Destruct that Bitch!

    by Kloipy

    I think I just became an action hero

  • April 19, 2007, 11:59 a.m. CST

    Oh man come man

    by FRESHEST GUY IN PARIS

    Batman being jewish that's a funny image. Imagine the guy getting anxiety attack in his own batcave.... I would love it

  • April 19, 2007, 12:01 p.m. CST

    actually it's more racist than funny

    by Kloipy

    but i guess that's just a cultural divide

  • April 19, 2007, 12:04 p.m. CST

    Kloipy Is Actually John Voight

    by kevinwillis.net

    Using AICN TalkBack's to get back at his estranged daughter. Uncool, dude. Uncool. I expected more from the Midnight Cowboy.

  • April 19, 2007, 12:05 p.m. CST

    I am jewish, i like

    by FRESHEST GUY IN PARIS

    I am jewish, i like pastrami, i worry too much, i terrible in sports, And i do have pannick attack I am a steretoype i guess. But you need those otherwise reel racists doesn't know what to fear

  • April 19, 2007, 12:06 p.m. CST

    FRESHEST GUY IN PARIS

    by Kal El Vis

    Racist comment? How dare he?? I demand he be suspended from the Talkbacks for 2 weeks, followed 1 day later by his "firing" from said Talkbacks! There is NO room for these kind of comments HERE.

  • April 19, 2007, 12:06 p.m. CST

    after that football movie I did it went downhill

    by Kloipy

    I have a problem, i'm sorry Angie

  • April 19, 2007, 12:09 p.m. CST

    I don't think Jewish people talk like Tarzan

    by Kloipy

    They Fear fear itself!!!!

  • April 19, 2007, 12:13 p.m. CST

    Lol . I know, i am making

    by FRESHEST GUY IN PARIS

    Lol . I know, i am making any effort to write properly it is a lazy day for me. I in bed, i computer on stomach, i not move never, see what kind of guy i am.

  • April 19, 2007, 12:14 p.m. CST

    Why did Doc Ock continue with his device after

    by ComputerGuy68

    the accident? I thought it made no sense. I'll catch SM3 via torrents thank you...

  • April 19, 2007, 12:20 p.m. CST

    Firing Frenchest Guy on Talkbacks . . .

    by kevinwillis.net

    He's French. That would be racist, to fire him for supposed racism. That would be like there being consequences to Al Sharpton participating in a fraudulent show trial to try and get an innocent white guy put in jail and getting in trouble for it. Or calling Jesse Jackson on the carpet for his anti-Jewish comments.<br><br> There are two important things that must be in place before someone can be accused of racism: 1: "They must be white and American or pro-American but preferably actually American, and preferably male" and 2: "They don't need to do anything else. If they're white and male and American, they are de facto racists. Fire their asses. Now."

  • April 19, 2007, 12:22 p.m. CST

    I guess that makes a racist then

    by Kloipy

    Thank God, we don't have double standards in this country!

  • April 19, 2007, 12:23 p.m. CST

    What a looser !!!

    by FRESHEST GUY IN PARIS

    How can you watch a movie like that trough torrent. I mean with such a poor quality, do not watch it at all. Do you really want to see it on a computer with a moving frame, hearing the laughters of an audiance so dumb it doesn't notice a camecorder on a tripod. You know what man FUCK YOU !! Yep Fuck you for your lack of exigence in life. I hate people like you, you'd better never watch the fuckin' thing. At least rent the dvd. "I'll catch the torrent" Dumbass! you should be ashamed.

  • April 19, 2007, 12:24 p.m. CST

    Dock Ock Continued With His Device . . .

    by kevinwillis.net

    Because the tentacles told him to, through their neural nano connections.<br><br>A better question is why didn't a trillion degree fusion reaction, even if ostensibly contained, at least result in a gigantic steam explosion when it hit the water? Something of that size, at fission or fusion temperatures, should have caused a mushroom cloud of steam over New York at the very least. But then we couldn't have seen that dramatic scene of Doc Oc sinking into the blackness. <br><br> Spiderman 4: Bruce Campbell as Mysterio. Topher Grace can play Peter Parker, for all I care. And then he can team up with Firestar and Ice Man and they'll call themselves the Spiderfriends!

  • April 19, 2007, 12:27 p.m. CST

    I Have Issues With the Words . . .

    by kevinwillis.net

    "Doc" and "Ock". I suppose that's why I could never break into comic book writing. <br><br> Torrent's suck. Go see the movie, buy the DVD, or don't watch the damn movie.

  • April 19, 2007, 12:29 p.m. CST

    I'm waiting for the Jubilee movie

    by Kloipy

    July 4th the sparks will fly

  • April 19, 2007, 12:29 p.m. CST

    Looser . . . ?

    by kevinwillis.net

    The word is "Loser", Frenchy. I frequently have made fun of the spelling and speech of people for whom English is not a first language, even though I don't know any other language. I once harasses a South Korean guy in college about it (years ago), and it pissed him off, but, fortunately, he didn't decided to shoot me. <br><br> Or, if you want to be extra hip, try: "Lozer!" or just hold up your finger and your thumb in the shape of an "L" on your forehead.

  • April 19, 2007, 12:33 p.m. CST

    also you should say "Word to your mother"

    by Kloipy

    as often as possible. That's what the cool kids say all the time

  • April 19, 2007, 12:34 p.m. CST

    Two Towers

    by Mattyboy122

    Was the weakest because they made a film that was just as long as Fellowship while containing about half of the content of the actual book. While the Extended Edition of Fellowship only made it better, it made The Two Towers even more boring. If Anything, TTT needed more cut out (like, say, the superfluous stuff Jackson threw in there). What's more, Helm's Deep is cringeworthy much of the time. Too little meshing of cg and live-action footage in the same shot, making it painfully obvious when we were seeing an all-effects shot and an all-real shot. Luckily Jackson fixed that problem by combining cg and live-action in Return of the King. But yeah, Fellowship was the best of the bunch there. Oh, and Spider-Man 3 looks pretty awful, Batman Begins was good, but dull, and Mask of the Phantasm is the best comic book flick made. Done and done.

  • April 19, 2007, 12:37 p.m. CST

    Jubilee: The Motion Picture

    by kevinwillis.net

    They made that movie: <br><br> http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0076240/ <br><br> Oh, you mean the mutant. Well, hell, I'm stilling waiting for a Dazzler movie. Mutant disco would kick seven different kinds of ass.<br><br> More the the point, hopefully the Wolverine movie will establish that the X-franchise is an excellent source of spin-offs. I'd like to see more of even the crappy characters, in other movies. Surely, more Iceman and Pyro, much more Kitty Pryde, Colossus, Nightcrawler . . . most of these characters are good enough to get their own movies. I'm a big fanboy of the idea of having the next Hulk film, or the first Hulk sequel, be a thoughtful, well-scripted take on the Hulk Vs. Wolverine series of Hulk comics that was Wolverine's debut. <br><br>And Angel. What a great character, and really short changed in X3 (which I did not hate, btw). Although I'm hoping an X4 features a re-powered Mystique and Magneto squaring off. And maybe Nightcrawler comes back, and Halle Berry's shoe-horned Storm dialog disappears forever. And Tobey MacGuire makes a guest appearance as the photographer from the Daily Bugle. And Kirsten Dunst gives me a lap dance. Am I asking too much?

  • April 19, 2007, 12:40 p.m. CST

    Word to Your Mother!

    by kevinwillis.net

    If there was a problem, Yo, I'll solve it. Check out the hook while my DJ revolves it! Ice, ice, baby.

  • April 19, 2007, 12:41 p.m. CST

    Halle Berry should just disappear

    by Kloipy

    after Catwoman. I didn't hate X3, def. the worst of the series, but still had it's moments of coolness

  • April 19, 2007, 12:41 p.m. CST

    I just want The Maxx to be a movie

    by Kloipy

    and I'd be happy

  • April 19, 2007, 12:42 p.m. CST

    Sounds plantastic

    by Rupee88

    but I agree it doesn't matter if it sucks, most everyone will still go see it.

  • April 19, 2007, 12:43 p.m. CST

    To the extreme I rock a mic like a vandle

    by Kloipy

    Look who's back. Dude, I'm not the one telling people I'm going to give them Total Fucking Destruction. That just screams "2 inch penis"

  • April 19, 2007, 12:44 p.m. CST

    The Two Towers was awesome!

    by Darth Thoth

    And the extended edition was a classic.

  • April 19, 2007, 12:46 p.m. CST

    X3 Underserved the Concept of the Phoenix Arc

    by kevinwillis.net

    It should have save Phoenix for 4, and kept the elements of the mutant war, beefed up angel, excised Storm, and it would have been a better movie. Famke would have had less to do, but she could appear to Wolverine and Scott as visions in their mind, with hints of the truly planetary destruction Dark Pheonix was leading towards . . . or had her come back, troubled but safe, with only hints of the darkness to come. <br><br> Ah, well. I don't care that they screwed with the comicbook plot (I really didn't want to see the Starjammers, sorry) but Dark Phoenix should have been wider in scope. Otherwise, I liked it--I liked that Beast took out Magneto, I liked that Magneto got taken out. And so on. But now, I must lunch.

  • April 19, 2007, 12:51 p.m. CST

    Enjoy my friend

    by Kloipy

    eat deep

  • April 19, 2007, 12:58 p.m. CST

    After Watching Spidey Film Clips

    by zinsider

    there is no way this movie could suck. http://tinyurl.com/26f3tl

  • April 19, 2007, 1:07 p.m. CST

    But w/ respects to SM3

    by Darth Thoth

    Great reviews. Thanks to those who sent them in. Good reads. I had to skim the spoiler stuff but from what I was able to gather it appears to play out exactly how I expected it to- good and bad. Well, in 2 weeks I'll find out for myself. Peace.

  • April 19, 2007, 1:09 p.m. CST

    X3

    by Darth Thoth

    Sucked. I'm sorry. It sucked so bad I was personally offended. Marvel should be ashamed for the way its property was treated. Pathetic.

  • April 19, 2007, 1:15 p.m. CST

    kevinwillis.net and frenchy

    by ComputerGuy68

    Thought it was a dumb plot for an otherwise OK film (Doc Ock stuff that is) <p> As for torrents, the stuff I watch is anamorphic, AC3 rips from DVD. And I watch them on my Widescreen TV. Never heard of a home theater PC?

  • April 19, 2007, 1:21 p.m. CST

    Oh and I get them about a month before the DVD hits

    by ComputerGuy68

    the store. Frenchy, go surrender to someone OK?

  • April 19, 2007, 1:47 p.m. CST

    Kevin Smith and the "they walk and they walk..." remark

    by Mr. Phoenix

    Yeah, like I'm going to seriously listen to the guy who made Jersey Girl. LOTR: Best trilogy yet made. Each film gets progressively better. Period. Spider-Man 2 is brilliant, I have high hopes for 3. Now back to the useless bitching and moaning.

  • April 19, 2007, 1:55 p.m. CST

    Eye Fuckers Are Go!

    by Doctor_Sin

    Thanx to everyone for the reviews. Pretty much sums up my expectations. I'll be there.

  • April 19, 2007, 2 p.m. CST

    Enjoy Spidey 3's bank truck chase

    by Fecal Debris

    and know that it's really Cleveland, and that I watched it all happen for real. Hey pillow, my house could use a vaccuum cleaning. Please send Hilary Duff over when she's finished there.

  • April 19, 2007, 2:24 p.m. CST

    "I Saw Highlander...It was Sheeet!"

    by DarfurOnTheRocks

    The first reviewer is clearly a plant. Here he is talking about the great movies of 82 and him wondering if any other movie to recapture that sentiment, but then forgets to mention that Pirates of the Caribbean? Nice try...

  • April 19, 2007, 2:26 p.m. CST

    ROTJ's duel better? WTF?

    by NightArrows

    QUOTE: "the final duel with Vader beats all the fancy CGI footwork in the prequels"END QUOTE Jesus, that's the dumbest thing I've read in a long time. The ROTJ duel is the weakest in the entire saga, that includeds Old Ben's duel in ANH. At least he had the excuse of being a thousand years old. ROTJ's duel was supposed to, and should have topped, ESB's. It's the final showdown and was weak as shit, "Wow, I can wave my saber back and forth cause this is the last film and I'm alowed to be fucking LAZY". I'm sorry but TPM's and especially ROTS's kicked it's fucking ass, then wiped it's ass with it. Am I also to believe you liked X3? That would say it all. X3 is an aborted piece of uninspired shit that catered to the mouth breathing masses who keep Paris Hilton in the spotlight and Britney Spears in Rolex...From top to bottom X3 was horrible, and missed so many opportunities to be great that Ratner and Rothman should be fired into the fucking sun.

  • April 19, 2007, 2:32 p.m. CST

    THIS SOUNDS SHIT. Raimi dropped the ball

    by performingmonkey

    We're getting two half-baked villains, more crap acting from James Franco (not to mention a STUPID plot device where he has amnesia just so they can include some scenes where he's normal), the symbiote meteorite just happening to hit next to Peter, Venom looking terrible, MJ not dying, Aunt May not dying and just being annoying, ruining the Uncle Ben thing by having Sandman involved. FUCK IT.

  • April 19, 2007, 2:37 p.m. CST

    Lightwave7871 you have a TERRIBLE taste in movies

    by Proman1984

    For my money "Two Towers" was by far the best movie in the LOTR trilogy. I mean WTF, man? Same goes for "Temple of Doom". You want to talk about dissapointing entires, how about "Back to the Future 3" or "Godfather 3". Or Batman Begins for that matter? Yes, I am one of those people who disliked "Batman Begins".

  • April 19, 2007, 2:39 p.m. CST

    NightArrows ->

    by kevinwillis.net

    X3 was fair. ROTJ duel was better than Empire and especially all of the tedious Revenge of the Sith. Two Towers rocked. The opening was da bomb. Gandalf's duel the the Balrog was better than any duel in the whole Star Wars pantheon. <br><br> Britney Spears is a troubled woman. I don't think much of Paris Hilton. But, yes, ROTJ duel was better and the movie was a remains my favorite of the series, with Empire next then ANH, then all three prequels strung together with all of the dialog that isn't Ian McDiarmid cut out. And anything that shows Christian Hayden's face for any length of time. I also enjoyed Back to the Future II and III equally. So there.

  • April 19, 2007, 2:41 p.m. CST

    I Enjoyed X3 About Ten Times More . . .

    by kevinwillis.net

    Than Superman Returns. And so did the rest of the movie going public world wide, judging by the box office. Ratner owned Singers ass, and not in a gay way. That is all.

  • April 19, 2007, 2:54 p.m. CST

    wow...

    by NightArrows

    You really have no fucking taste. Gandalf and the Balrog? WTF are you smoking? It's the worst compositing in the entire fucking series. Box office means jack fucking squat, as again, I direct you to Britney no talent Spears. She sells millions of "albums", and they are shit. Enjoy your Reality Distortion Field™, it seems to be working really well...

  • April 19, 2007, 2:57 p.m. CST

    To be fair...

    by Kal El Vis

    X3 WAS a better film than Superman Returns. But, that isn't saying much....

  • April 19, 2007, 3 p.m. CST

    The Landlord's Anorexic Daughter is back for this one?

    by themikejonas

    Awesome! That's all I needed to know!

  • April 19, 2007, 3:03 p.m. CST

    ROTJ duel was awesome because you had so much

    by superninja

    invested in the characters at that point. It beats anything in the prequels, that fight with Darth Maul was boring - who cares about any of those characters? Who care Qui-Gon and Maul bit it? I sure don't.

  • April 19, 2007, 3:04 p.m. CST

    Yeah, the gag with the landlord's daughter is odd

    by superninja

    and I'm not sure why it's being continued. Maybe she is Black Cat, hahah.

  • April 19, 2007, 3:09 p.m. CST

    That Gandalf/Balrog fight was bad.

    by superninja

    That should've been the most intense moment in the film, and it fell flat because of the scale. It needed to be more clausterphobic, more intense, but I never got a sense of dread at all. Disappointing!

  • April 19, 2007, 3:19 p.m. CST

    Gandalf/Balrod Fight Rocked

    by kevinwillis.net

    I Love It. I've watched it dozens of times. I can see your point about it being more clausterphobic, but I don't care. Still love it. I'm all for the landord's anorexic daughter being back. I liked Spiderman 2, and she certainly didn't hurt. Schwing!!

  • April 19, 2007, 3:21 p.m. CST

    The Gandalf/Balrog fight, not so much

    by kevinwillis.net

    You didn't see the Balrod fight? Maybe that was a different movie. I think that was Jenna Jameson and The Two Rock Hard Towers. Or The Coming of the King.

  • April 19, 2007, 3:23 p.m. CST

    NightArrows, I Hear You Are Frustrated

    by kevinwillis.net

    I'm sorry the success of Britney Spears and Brett Ratner has made you so unhappy. I wish you all the best in your own creatively superior endeavors!

  • April 19, 2007, 3:31 p.m. CST

    Who Let the *PLANTS* Out

    by da-giez

    who who who...

  • April 19, 2007, 3:32 p.m. CST

    What do you like about it? I'm curious.

    by superninja

    Choices like that (repeated throughout all three films) make me want Jackson nowhere near The Hobbit.

  • April 19, 2007, 3:42 p.m. CST

    What's Wrong With...

    by Darth Melkor

    Return of the Jedi, Back to the Future 3, and The Two Towers?

  • April 19, 2007, 3:47 p.m. CST

    Dude, I'm hoping that's a typo and you meant

    by superninja

    Back to the Future 2. :)

  • April 19, 2007, 3:51 p.m. CST

    "lord of the rings had two towers"

    by naked_mandy

    bullshit man. the extended cut of Two Towers is a fantastic movie, with the best pacing, characterization and tone of all three. The theatrical cut? maybe a bit weak, but still, I think it's bullshit to say that Lord of the Rings is a true example of a trilogy with a weak chapter. Then again, I also liked "Back to the Future part 3" quite a bit so maybe I'm just off my rocker.

  • April 19, 2007, 3:54 p.m. CST

    But X3 was fantastic!?!

    by ejcarter9

    So I don't get it.

  • April 19, 2007, 4:08 p.m. CST

    First harry/spidey fight scene ICONIC?! fuck i hope not

    by wolvenom

    if its the same scene we all got likea 7 minute preview of and you're telling me thats one of the top 2 fight scenes in the movie then FUCK THIS SHIT! That scene was mediocre at best.

  • April 19, 2007, 4:56 p.m. CST

    Just say, 'I love crepes!'

    by Jackie Boy

    Hakuna Matata, bitches!

  • April 19, 2007, 5:29 p.m. CST

    X3 better than Superman Returns?

    by Mr. Phoenix

    GIVE ME A FRIGGIN BREAK. Furthermore, Paris Hilton is not a better actress than Meryl Streep. The only place Ratner would ever own Singer's ass is in a "dumb fuck" competition. The Batrog/Gandalf duel IS CLEARLY AMAZING. IT's epic, iconic, and is true to the books. Don't hate on things just so you can feel unique.

  • April 19, 2007, 5:39 p.m. CST

    On Two Towers...

    by Godardwhowhatnow

    Two Towers had, hands down, the best dramatic pacing of all three films, and is by far the most watchable of the trilogy for that reason. Fellowship is great, but has its climax 45 minutes before the end of the film, and thus ends with a relative whimper. ROTK suffers from massive battle overload. The battles in ROTK seemed to be 'cranked to 11' daylight versions of Helm's Deep, and while they were indeed amazing in many ways, by the time Aragorn and company make it to the black gate, I was COMPLETELY desensitized to massive battles with swords and arrows. It was like watching the finale of a fireworks show go on for thirty minutes. Conversely, while the second act of TTT doesn't have the fury and spectacle that ROTK's does, it does have tension, which ROTK needed much more of. When Aragorn and company are suiting up for battle and preparing the villagers for their last stand, it actually feels like they're all doomed. This makes the Uruk army's first appearance over the horizon truly frightening. When Aragorn and company are barricaded in with Theoden and they suit up to ride out and face their attackers, part of me is actually worried that they may be going to their death. And best of all, it's a true climax. We don't get a watered down Amon-Hennish pseudoclimax, and we don't suffer through a half hour of [let's face facts, here] boring, "it's my duty to the fans and to the Tolkien estate" epiloguery. I left the theater after seeing Fellowship with restrained excitement, and I left the theater after seeing ROTK exhausted, but I left the theater after seeing TTT feeling exhilarated.

  • April 19, 2007, 6:13 p.m. CST

    two towers

    by silent 1

    felloship was the better film but two towers had the better beginning and climax gandalf vs the balrog and gandalf riding down the side of the mountain seeing those two scenes in the theater was nothing but fucking biblical

  • April 19, 2007, 6:18 p.m. CST

    SM3INO!!

    by finky089

    Eh, it CAN'T be worse than TINO will be in July. Just can't be.

  • April 19, 2007, 6:29 p.m. CST

    My freakin' luck

    by Darth Thoth

    I DJ part time and last fall my mother asked me to DJ an event on May 4th for some teachers at her school. A retirement dinner thing. Nothing big I thought. I was thinking a quick 2 hour afterschool/ afternoon affair in the gymnasium or something. I'd DJ it and then that night go out and watch SM-3. I just found out 20 minutes ago that the event is at a country club and runs from 6-11pm. Factor in equipment set up and breakdown time and my evening is now officially shot. That means no Friday night live crowd NYC Imax action. I am freakin' pissed! Pissed! PISSED!!! My freakin' luck. Do my mom a favor and get screwed out of my fun in return. Of course when I got this news I flipped. And of course my mother couldn't understand why and told me to get over it. Unreal. I'm so depressed right now. So depressed.

  • April 19, 2007, 6:31 p.m. CST

    Two Towers

    by Maceox

    Did that guy just call TTT the weak link in the trilogy? Ummm O.K. everyone has opinions but well...Ummmmmm...(Be Nice) Ummm I respecttttt your opinionNooooooo. What a Dumb Ass!!!! Whew I tried to be nice. Oh Well.

  • April 19, 2007, 6:32 p.m. CST

    Le Mec le plus faible de Paris

    by Barry Guiler

    You’ve ruined our reputation in the United States more than Chirac did back in 2002 using our veto power at the UN Security Council against the Irak war...Well done dude.

  • April 19, 2007, 6:37 p.m. CST

    Lord of the Rings

    by Darth Thoth

    I thought the beauty of that series was that all 3 were of serious quality and top notch. Whereas other trilogies there may have been a clear weak link, in Rings, you could argue any of the 3 were the best. There's the wonder and magic of the first. The splendor and honor of the second. And the majesty and spectacle of the third. Of the theatrical releases, I will say though that I think ROTK was the worst and FOTR was the best. TTT was smack in the middle. But the extended editions of each were all classics. Each movie can stand alone as an epic adventure and cinematic achievement that history will remember as special.

  • April 19, 2007, 6:48 p.m. CST

    The Two Towers

    by Doc_Strange

    I think it is a good middle ground to the trilogy but I think the parts Jackson included that weren't in the book were dumb and unjustified such as the two kids in the beginning that had nothing to do with the story, then Aragorn falling off the cliff with a warg only to show up in what's possibly the most "Hollywood" moment of the three films. Basically all the parts that Jackson made to the films make them a little bit weaker. I mean who didn't want to see the struggle Frodo went through after being stabbed by the ringwraith? The pain that he went through only to get to the Ford of Rivendell (by himself) on his horse, near death and yet still defiant all the while the black riders calling out to him to come back with them to Mordor. The whole scene having Arwen protecting him while racing to Rivendell was the stupidest part of all the films. Want proof? Check out the Bakshi LOTR for that very scene. It was done a thousand times better in a lesser movie. I will say though that LOTR as a whole is one of the greatest film trilogies of all time though there can be only one Return and it's of the Jedi

  • April 19, 2007, 7:04 p.m. CST

    HARRY WHERE IS THE STORY ON SPIDEY THE MUSICAL?

    by Deus Vult

    LOS ANGELES (Hollywood Reporter) - Get ready for "Spider-Man: The Broadway Musical." <p> That may not be the official title, but Marvel Studios is putting the pieces together for a musical on the Great White Way starring the popular superhero. <p> Julie Taymor, who won Tonys for direction and costume design for the Broadway production of "The Lion King," will direct, with U2's Bono and The Edge creating new music and lyrics for the project. <p> Auditions are taking place, and a reading is scheduled for the summer. No dates for a Broadway opening have been set. <p> While the Spider-Man musical marks the first time a Marvel character has been the subject of a Broadway show, it's not the first time a superhero has hit the stage. Superman was in the spotlight of "It's a Bird, It's a Plane, It's Superman," which opened at the Alvin Theatre in 1966. Despite fairly positive reviews, it closed a few months later. <p> Spider-Man will next be seen on the big screen, when the third installment of the blockbuster franchise opens across North America on May 4. <p> Reuters/Hollywood Reporter

  • April 19, 2007, 7:56 p.m. CST

    Gays Gotta Eat Too

    by Roboteer

    Even in France. Couldn't resist. But when it comes to Liz Banks, count me as a lesbian... Aunt May wouldn't last the year in France. They'd all come back from vacances in Septembre and find her mort from hyperthermia. C'est la vie. Elle était vieille enfin. And never forget... Mon aéroglisseur est rempli d'anguilles!!!!

  • April 19, 2007, 8:06 p.m. CST

    "There can be only one Return and it's of the Jedi"

    by kevinwillis.net

    That's so true. Plus, naked_mandy, I also liked Back to the Future III a great deal. I love the whole Back To the Future trilogy.

  • April 19, 2007, 8:09 p.m. CST

    Of course the LOTR movies could've been worse.

    by superninja

    Since when is that considered a credit to a film? I guess when you accept mediocrity, that's when. The films are competently made in an ocean of incompetence, that's true. My issue is that they could've been better, stronger, there could have been a heightened otherworldiness about them they were not magical enough. Of course McKellan, Holm and Bean pulled off their characters perfectly. But that Mortenson is not a great Aragorn. Bean should've been Aragorn.

  • April 19, 2007, 8:10 p.m. CST

    Deus Vult there was a whole story dedicated

    by superninja

    to it, it's just that no one really cares so it fell off.

  • April 19, 2007, 8:12 p.m. CST

    I wish I had gotten to go to the London screening

    by Smashing

    Instead of that moany reviewer, I am stoked for this film, and Spidey dancing is listed as one of his powers in a recent issue of a comic so bring it on.

  • April 19, 2007, 8:13 p.m. CST

    Spiderman the comic awesome, the movies not so much

    by 18to88

    Raimi's Spiderman annoys the tar out of me, mostly how pathetic Tobey is. Terrible casting - he's such douche. I wanted to love these movies, but sadly they both rank in my top four most annoying movies: 1. Shrek 2. Shrek 2 3. Spiderman 4. Spiderman 2 5. 6. Anyone want to guess what movies I'm reserving spots five and six for?

  • April 19, 2007, 8:42 p.m. CST

    Skull Fucker

    by erikharrison

    The term is "skull fucker"

  • April 19, 2007, 9:22 p.m. CST

    18to88...

    by MonteCristo

    I assume 5 and 6 go to POTC: COTB and POTC: DMC?

  • April 19, 2007, 10:07 p.m. CST

    Fine then, superninja

    by Mr. Phoenix

    Go make YOUR version of LOTR, since you obviously have a brilliant, intelligent, and undiscovered talent. Ocean of incompetance? Yeah, right. Your kids must think you're the COOLEST.

  • April 19, 2007, 10:39 p.m. CST

    I love how the 2nd..

    by Redfive!

    Review points out at how disappointed the film is and coughs *Ratner* at the end of his review.Considering how Raimi's worst film is still better than Ratners best im thinking this dude had one too many pints going into the film and probally loves the rush hour films...CANT WAIT FOR RUSH HOUR 3 HUH?

  • April 19, 2007, 10:40 p.m. CST

    Yeah, that logic never fails to amaze me.

    by superninja

    You have to go make your own movies to have a critical eye. Because you know, when you make comments about anything, you have to have actually done it yourself to have an opinion.

  • April 19, 2007, 10:49 p.m. CST

    Ugh

    by SgtFretSurfer

    Damn I must be deficient because I really liked X-Men 3. And I praise the work Singer did on the first two. I just love them all, really. But on Spidey, this is the kind of movie I wanna see in the theater. I like having things like this to look forward to as an event to plan for going to the movies. Popcorn, soda, crowds, all of it. I just wanna have a good time at the movies. ;;

  • April 20, 2007, 12:27 a.m. CST

    I like this movie, so I am better than you

    by INWOsuxRED

    You like a movie I don't like, so you are wrong about everything.</br></br> I hope no other tentpole American movie ever releases in other countries first. The foreign reviews coming in first just aren't right for an American icon. Most of my fears about this movie seem to be hit on by the reviews, to the point where I have very low expectations, which will be fulfilled by the effects alone. I know this movie will be great because Dunst is in it.

  • April 20, 2007, 12:40 a.m. CST

    I still say..

    by Resurrected

    ..that Spiderman couldn't be any gayer even if he stiched his costume out of rainbow flags. It's unbelievable the hilarity that came from all the "Oh, how do I get MJ to like me?" While snaggletooth was getting double teamed by Harry & the astronaut.

  • April 20, 2007, 12:57 a.m. CST

    YES!!!

    by Style_92

    The tide has turned! The Legion of Talkbackers now hate Sam Raimi, Tobey Maguire, and the Spider-man franchise! Vindication is mine! LET THE SLAUGHTER BEGIN!

  • April 20, 2007, 1:04 a.m. CST

    "The JOKER" on set pic

    by The Artist FKA Vesuvio

    In other news, you're welcome (despite the crappy quality of the photo) ... www.tinyurl.com/3ck4do

  • April 20, 2007, 1:06 a.m. CST

    Nice Joker pic, there. Too bad AICN won't give props

    by Doctor_Sin

    But, we, the viewers, thank you.

  • April 20, 2007, 1:07 a.m. CST

    Oh, and also

    by The Artist FKA Vesuvio

    Here http://tinyurl.com/3yjpza , and here http://tinyurl.com/33n2dx .

  • April 20, 2007, 2:42 a.m. CST

    X-men "close to a brilliant brilliant trilogy"?!

    by Devil By The Deed

    Part one and that cockamanie "turn everyone into mutants" scheme was almost as lame as the third one. I betcha Singer does the same with Superman and the sequel is way better than the first.

  • April 20, 2007, 3:46 a.m. CST

    FIRST PIC OF LEDGER AS THE JOKER

    by bomardv

    http://tinyurl.com/yu2num

  • April 20, 2007, 4:42 a.m. CST

    Smashing...

    by Lightwave7871

    Moany reviewer eh? Hey ho thats your opinion based on a movie you haven't fucking seen... Sam Rami, Sony and Marvel bless you for your blind devotion and would like you to go buy a ticket to every showing because you love the film already... Also if you could just write a review now that says "Wooo fuck yeah Best. Movie. EVAH!!!" that would be fantastic.... Its interesting though that more issue has been raised about my choice of "weak" chapters than about the fact that Spiderman 3 might actually not be that good... And for the record, for the third time, I'm not saying they're bad films per se, simply not as good as the others in the series, its a relative thing... I'd still watch Two Towers over Spiderman 3 any day, but conversely I liked Spiderman and the sequel so, you know its an opinion...

  • April 20, 2007, 6:40 a.m. CST

    Superman Returns

    by Mixlexic

    Saw it in the cinema and was unimpressed, Watched it yesterday on DVD and loved it, I guess my point is that after the hype dies you watch a film on its own merits and cn be pleasantly surprised. I even found X3 tolerable on a second veiwing.

  • April 20, 2007, 7:45 a.m. CST

    Disappointing....

    by grendel69

    ... As I always knew including Venom/Black suit was a mistake. I never got what people saw in Venom anyway. And I though TTT wasnt a good movie either. Nothign happened until the battle of whatever. I still think the first film is the best one.

  • April 20, 2007, 8:18 a.m. CST

    Critics Are More Common Than Water

    by kevinwillis.net

    And are about as valuable and as useful as moldy sacks of putrid Bonobo monkey vomit. The vast majority of critiques are malodorous, like the flatulence of a disease hippopotamus.<br><br>While it can be fun to critique and express our opinions, to pretend that it is anything other than public verbal masturbation is to way over value the filthy product of our own bowel movements, and consider the foul issuance of our narcissistic self-absorption to be the equal of an edict from the Gods. <br><br> Thus, when you piss on creative works that do extremely well by any rational yardstick--and the LOTR trilogy was hugely profitable, hugely popular, deeply satisfying to the great majority of viewers, moved tons of DVDs and special editions, and won numerous awards--what should not be surprised that, given the fact you have done almost nothing creative, productive, or worthwhile with your life, and seem to derive what little poisoned joy your small and pointless life does have by attacking the creative triumphs of others--that some will critique back, explaining that, due to the paucity of output on your part--indeed, the complete vacuum of anything productive from your life visible to us, whatsoever--that your public masturbation of your tiny and deformed critiquing rod will earn the occasion boo or catcall.<br><br> My critique of the critiques of others is complete. I have thus relieved myself. My apologies to the Bonobo monkeys.

  • April 20, 2007, 8:20 a.m. CST

    X3 WAS better than Superman Returns

    by Kal El Vis

    Period.

  • April 20, 2007, 8:20 a.m. CST

    Kevin Willis

    by Mr Gorilla

    Man - you're on fire! The stuff about flag-waving, and the 'American Way' (which includes, by the way, the waging of illegal wars). But it's not really fair to compare to the 70s Superman film. After all, The Spy Who Loved Me (1977) had James Bond using a Union Jack parachute - and I didn't notice much of that stuff going on in Casino Royale. Maybe because the British wage illegal wars too. My feelings come down to this: I personally hate having a flag waved in my fact when I'm trying to have a good time. (Unless, of course, it's actually relevant to the story.) Doesn't matter what flag it is. But I believe Stan Lee once went on record saying that he didn't want his heroes used for propaganda purposes - I can't find the quote on this, though, and would be happy to be put right on it.

  • April 20, 2007, 8:31 a.m. CST

    Glad you're amazed.

    by Mr. Phoenix

    Kevinwillis.net said it all perfectly.

  • April 20, 2007, 8:35 a.m. CST

    Mr Gorilla

    by Kal El Vis

    Just because YOU inject politics into a symbol, doesn't mean the rest of us do as well. "waging of illegal wars". Give me a break, you fucking broken record.

  • April 20, 2007, 9:52 a.m. CST

    Dark Peter = Teen Wolf??

    by Mike_D

    Is that what they're saying? haha, thats priceless.

  • April 20, 2007, 10:33 a.m. CST

    May parker: herald of cloud-lactus

    by silverdog

    now, that´s an spin-off worth making.....

  • April 20, 2007, 10:47 a.m. CST

    Kal El Vis

    by Mr Gorilla

    Hey there - the 'waging...' sentence does sound a bit broken record, you're right about that. But to be fair, when it comes to symbols, a flag is definitely nearer the more 'political' end of the spectrum. It's a national pride thing that is often rolled out at elections at at times of war. Spielberg used the US flag at the very beginning of 'Saving Private Ryan', I'm sure you'll recall. Patton walks out in front of one at the start of, er, 'Patton'. So don't accuse me of 'injecting politics' into the issue. And baby, don't use that foul, foul language.

  • April 20, 2007, 12:14 p.m. CST

    Political is in the eye of the beholder

    by Fecal Debris

    a flag is only as political or as patriotic as you make it out to be. Otherwise, it really is just a piece of colored fabric. It's people who project meaning into it. And if a flag appears in a movie in a military cemetery, it's probably not because the director wants to make a statement, but because it's a friggin movie about dead American soldiers and has a scene in a military cemetery. That's all.

  • April 20, 2007, 12:27 p.m. CST

    Well Aint It Cool News...

    by Double-Oh

    that Raimi just confirmed that there will be a Spidey 4,5 and 6?

  • April 20, 2007, 12:40 p.m. CST

    4, 5 & 6??

    by nonsensical

    How different will these be if Raimi and the cast aren't returning? http://tinyurl.com/2tcv7r

  • April 20, 2007, 12:47 p.m. CST

    Oh and if this does happen...

    by nonsensical

    I swear to the almighty gods of hollywood that if Sam Raimi doesn't bring in Burce Campbell as Mysterio or finally turn Connors into the Lizard, I will kill his car. I mean seriously, look at the way he's mamnged to get his damn car to appear in every one of the Spidey films. I wonder if that car has its SAG card or an IMDB profile.

  • April 20, 2007, 1:09 p.m. CST

    Spiderman Copies the Superman franchise!!!

    by IG76

    I- Discovers Powers/Faces Nemesis 2- Wants to give up powers/Faces Nemesis 3- Turns Bad. F**k me? Can you not see this? Go watch Superman I-IV (Yes, I said IV) because there's more heart in three seconds than this trash. Even Bruce Campbell wanted NOTHING to do with it. Suck my balls Spidergeeks!

  • April 20, 2007, 1:20 p.m. CST

    Haha. What did kevin willis write there that actually

    by superninja

    meant anything? I love it when people criticise criticism, but then fail to refute the points made or add anything of their own to the discussion. That whole post is masturbatory. Of course its valid to debate the merits of anything.

  • April 20, 2007, 1:38 p.m. CST

    IG76...

    by Double-Oh

    The content of the first two films occurred in the comics long before the Superman movies. And no thanks, I don't suck balls, but I'm pretty sure people who like Superman IV do.

  • April 20, 2007, 3:14 p.m. CST

    The America Flag, The American Way

    by kevinwillis.net

    Was always a big part of Superman, like it or not. Not "Truth, justice . . . all that stuff." Sheesh! I have no trouble with the Union Jack in The Spy Who Loved Me. I think it would be awesome. The only thing I dislike about my favorite BBC shows than their anti-Americanism is their anti-Britishness. It's so cool and emo to hate your country. Like, gag me with a spoon.<br><br>The flag, especially, doesn't really come with a requisite political agenda or partisan viewpoint, unless you are anti-whatever-country. In which case, there are plenty of movies being made for you, but "feel good" superhero films aren't them. And Spiderman landing in front of a flag while the music swells is proganda for only on thing . . .Spiderman. And Marvel Films. Which is kind of like 2 things. But has nothing to do with Shia Labeouf, so I don't know why you even brought him up. <br><br>BTW, national pride is largely separate from a particular contemporary policy. You may think Bush's war in Iraq sucks, I may think Clinton's war is Kosovo was Bonobo monkey excretions, and yet I liked America during Clinton, took care of my flag and displayed it then, have displayed during Bush, would be displaying it during Kerry as we cut and run, if that had been the case, and will display it, with pride, under either Hillary or Obama.<br><br>As a wise man once said: "America! Fuck yeah!"

  • April 20, 2007, 3:20 p.m. CST

    Superninja: It Is Certainly Valid to Debate The Merits

    by kevinwillis.net

    Of anything. Including the vacuity and substanceless of the ill-informed opinions of dilettantes. That's what gives us, as Elton John sang in some Disney movie, the circle of perpetual criticism.<br><br> Frankly, I've found all your opinions to be thoughtful and well-reasoned, and you've certainly changed my mind on a whole host of issues, from traffic laws to global warming. <br><br> And, like you, I love it when people criticize things without adding anything valid to the argument or actually refuting a single point. So you go, girrrl!

  • April 20, 2007, 3:25 p.m. CST

    Spiderman 4,5 and 6

    by kevinwillis.net

    That's not exactly news. Raimi said that as early as May, 2005.<br><br> http://www.ropeofsilicon.com/news.php?id=2153 <br><br> Also recently covered here, with Tobey saying he would do it if the right "elements" ($30-cough-million-cough-plus-hack-backend-cough) came together: <br><br> http://tinyurl.com/2kmanv

  • April 20, 2007, 3:42 p.m. CST

    kevin, I did make a point. My point is your criticism

    by superninja

    arguement is a straw man.

  • April 20, 2007, 3:49 p.m. CST

    I mean given that no one here seems to be of an

    by superninja

    opinion that their criticsm is anything other than just that, at what point do you get to decide that they are accomplished enough (at whatever it is they need to be accomplished at in your opinion, I'm not sure what that may be) to be able to have valid criticism on anything, much less a film?

  • April 20, 2007, 4:31 p.m. CST

    POTC is destined to be the funnest trilogy ever

    by Doc_Strange

    After seeing the new trailer and having seen the previous two I believe that title is warranted for this franchise, as well it should be.

  • April 20, 2007, 4:42 p.m. CST

    Watched Spidey 2.1

    by nonsensical

    Have to say... the J. Johah Jamison in the Spidey costume thwiping around his office is priceless. Absolutely priceless. <p> Rent it, watch it, maybe even own it.

  • April 20, 2007, 4:53 p.m. CST

    Venom the Musical!

    by canvasseamonkey

    thats what i say

  • April 20, 2007, 7:55 p.m. CST

    Superninja: So?

    by kevinwillis.net

    And your criticisms are tedious and pointless. Plus, even if my critique of your critique is made of straw, and your critique is made of sticks, both can be blown down by the Big Bad Wolf. It will only be the criticism made of bricks that is worthy of our attention. <br><br>If it's any consolation, I find Harry's reviews about worthless 90% of the time as well, and he's the Headgeek.<br><br>As far as creative output that you need to produce before I'd consider your critiques meaningful, you're right, that whole argument is a straw man. If you had a reasoned and thoughtful critique that showed reasonable consideration and didn't deal in a bunch of absolutes, I wouldn't care if you'd ever even written a short story (or some really solid web code). However, if you were secretly Peter Jackson (or Kevin Smith) and I found your criticism tedious, I'd ride you on it, anyway. <br><br> Sort of like, what's good for the goose is good for the gander. Just what I'm doing right now is as easy as tossing off a dozen random criticisms about a movie or book, but actually making a movie or writing a book is a great deal more involved and complicated, so nit-picking good creative work to death seems to me to be a product of irrational expectations.<br><br> As a result, I often enjoy films that most people hate or don't care for, because I do not expect miracles and I'm not looking to pick them apart, or rooting for them to fail. I even went into Ghost Rider with an open mind, and my criticism afterwards was basically, "Meh." <br><br> And I went to art school. You think I'd be more appreciative of the art of critiquing.

  • April 20, 2007, 7:59 p.m. CST

    I Own Spiderman 2

    by kevinwillis.net

    It's a great superhero movie, on a dozen levels. Sure, I liked X3 only slightly less than X2, but Spiderman2 4is a brilliant movie. I'm gonna watch it again tomorrow. But I will never watch it as many times as I've seen Superman the Movie. I've seen it something over sixty times. Years ago, I could basically recite the dialog, although that ability is long gone.<br><br> Never gonna do that with the anemic Superman Returns. "Truth, justice, all that stuff." Meh and double-meh.

  • April 20, 2007, 8:42 p.m. CST

    Superninja's arch-nemisis

    by Style_92

    The straw man, and an army of straw soldiers ready to misrepresent arguements. Maybe I'm employing a straw man right now! Or maybe Superninja employs straw men as fall guys by accusing others of using Straw men! Oh, the Straw-politics of it all!<br> <br> But I love ya Superninja. It's Kevin Willis I don't care for, who thinks that just by being creative with how you phrase "took a shit" makes your arguement more inteligent.

  • April 20, 2007, 11:07 p.m. CST

    Nah, I don't have an arch nemesis.

    by superninja

    I just think its odd to come to AICN and then bash on geeks for bashing on movies. Its the most bashingest place on the internet. It's not the geekest, though.

  • April 20, 2007, 11:11 p.m. CST

    We do agree that Superman Returns

    by superninja

    should be returned. Also, I think people are generally unfair to X3. In perspective of the other films, it is a good finale. I'm not sure why people expected the scope of the Dark Phoenix saga with the two prior films being so small in scope all things considered.

  • April 20, 2007, 11:45 p.m. CST

    I can except X3

    by Style_92

    as the flawed but still good finale to the X-men trilogy. But I still think it could have been better.

  • April 20, 2007, 11:46 p.m. CST

    err, "accept X3"

    by Style_92

    I'm an asshole

  • April 21, 2007, 12:22 a.m. CST

    I think they could've been better, same with

    by superninja

    the Spider-Man movie, same with the LOTR movies. Harry Potter 3 is a perfect movie. No complaints about that. I would like to sees Curaon direct a superhero film.

  • April 21, 2007, 12:23 a.m. CST

    "See". Curaon direct a superhero film. I am still

    by superninja

    waiting for someone to make a true superhero film, enough with this realism stuff.

  • April 21, 2007, 1:46 a.m. CST

    Harry Potter 3

    by Mr Gorilla

    Yesss. It IS a lovely movie. A kid's movie, but so what? So was ET. I see it getting some love on these pages, but it's interesting how much hate the Potter films get in other forums. On Emporeonline.com, for example, they all seem to hate it.